This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 12, The Business English Feedback Sandwich to Build Real Relationships.
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Hey, Michelle. What's shaking? What's going on with you?
Hey, Lindsay. Not too much. Not too much.
How's it going with you? Well, I'm feeling pretty good.
But, you know, when I get feedback and the feedback is not so good, I don't tend to take it very well.
What about you? Do you take feedback very well or are you kind of sensitive to feedback?
Um, I think I'm all right with it. Yeah, I mean, I'm kind of, I don't know, I try and not take things personally.
Oh, it's so hard, though. It definitely is, of course.
But yeah, you can just kind of, you know, take it all in.
And, you know, even in class, you know, I want my students to be able to give each other feedback, and I need to give feedback.
So you just have to realize it's not personal, but it's meant to help you improve.
Exactly. And a lot of our listeners are business professionals, guys.
And, you know, today's episode is specifically for people in the workplace.
Like, you know, how do we how can we be more charismatic at work when it comes to offering feedback?
And often feedback is negative or constructive, right?
Called constructive criticism is this expression that we have, this chunk that we use as native speakers.
So we want to show you guys how to do that today.
You know, how do you actually introduce feedback?
Where do you place the feedback? Do you include praise?
And how do you do that in English? So today is kind of a big topic for you guys.
So if you're using English at work, I want you to, you know, listen closely here.
And, you know, during the episode, at the end of the episode, we're going to show you how you can practice this a little bit more, okay?
So let's jump into it, Michelle. I mean, what are some ways that we could introduce bad feedback, you know?
Okay. Yeah. Well, you could say, just for an example, you could say, don't take this the wrong way.
Yeah, exactly. Don't take this the wrong way.
But, you know, whenever I hear that, I know it's going to be something bad.
Yep, yep, yep. Yeah. Yeah. Don't take this the wrong way.
But you did not do a good job on that report.
No, no. Yeah, I mean, you should brace yourself for some negative feedback when someone starts a sentence this way.
Okay, guys? Obviously. Another way to do it would be to say, you know, you're very organized.
Having said that, one area for improvement could be the accuracy of your reports.
So this having said that is kind of a transition, okay, that signifies that now you're going to move into some negative feedback, some constructive criticism.
Right. Right. So both like this and don't take this the wrong way.
You know, you're going to be picking on something.
So it's going to be like, yeah, don't take this the wrong way.
But I think X, Y and Z could be improved.
But, you know, don't take it personally.
And the same thing for your very organized, having said that.
Yeah, both of them. It's like kind of, you know, be prepared.
Yeah, don't take it personally. Exactly.
Exactly. And then one last phrase that we could use is what, Michelle?
Something that could be done better is... Yeah, I like how this one is used in the passive form, right?
Could be done. Something that could be done better.
Instead of something you could do better, something that could be done better.
And we're going to talk a little bit more.
Sorry? What? No, I said could be done better.
Wink, wink. By you. By you. Yeah, exactly.
Exactly. So it's all about how can we be very careful...
When we introduce these phrases to not sever the connection, that's why we're here.
And connections at work are so, so, so important to our career success and our happiness.
I mean, we spend 40 plus hours a week every week at work around our colleagues and we want to have good relationships with them.
And it's such a shame if the reason we don't have good relationships is that we don't have the right words.
That's why we created our course, the Charismatic Connector Guides. at allearsenglish.com forward slash charisma.
And you know, that's why we're helping you guys today.
We want you to master these skills. So Michelle, have you ever heard of the feedback sandwich?
It sounds familiar. Where is this from? I don't know.
I mean, it's from it's from pop culture, business, the business world.
It's there are some derogatory terms that are used to describe this kind of sandwich, too.
But I'm not going to use that word on this show.
This show is clean. Well, yeah. So what is the feedback sandwich?
All right. So it's when we have like a sandwich, like the bread is something positive.
The meat is the criticism and the bread on the other side is something positive.
So we start with a positive. We add the negative and then we say another positive.
OK. And this is very cultural. Right. I mean, this is something that's kind of expected in the U.S. to do it this way.
It's a good way to do it. But in other countries, you know, there might just be that negative feedback and that's it.
So we have to be careful when we work across cultures that we know what the expectations are of the people that we're working with.
You know, it's interesting. Right. Yeah, because it's good.
You know, you introduce the feedback on a positive note.
So the person, you know, knows, okay, you have faith in them.
And then you go into the little negative part or the little constructive criticism.
But then you want to end on a positive note, right?
Yeah. Yeah. And you could even add to that by adding like a future suggestion.
You know, that's good, too. So let's give our listeners an example of the feedback sandwich.
So let's let's start. You know, let's say that I just gave a presentation.
OK, and you're going to give me a little feedback.
So, Michelle, what did you think of my presentation?
Well, I really liked the visuals that you used.
Oh, great. Okay. Okay. I'm glad to hear that.
Yeah. It seemed like the presentation could have been more interactive.
Oh, I see what you mean. Yeah, that's a good point.
I could have asked more questions. Yeah.
I mean, but overall, I think you're doing a great job.
Oh, thanks. I did have a good time presenting today.
You know, I enjoyed it. Why not try adding a few more points to your conclusion next time?
Right. A future suggestion. Yeah, exactly.
So this is a good example of the positive.
What was the positive point that you said, Michelle?
OK, well, I said that I really liked the visuals that you used.
OK, so you started with something positive and then you moved into the criticism.
You said it seemed like again, I think using this phrase, it seemed like is another strategic way to not be so direct.
Why is that more? Why isn't that more indirect than saying you could have been more interactive in your your style?
Why is it? Well, a couple of reasons. It seemed like because usually when things seem it's not 100 percent definite.
Right. Exactly. Yeah. And also and also wait, I lost my train of thought.
It's yeah. So that was the main that was the main point.
That was the main point. It appeared that right is another way.
But if we say it appeared that that's a bit more formal.
So but it means the same thing. It was my impression that that's the way I saw it.
And also, yeah, you're not saying you're not focusing it on the person.
You're just focusing it on the work, you know, that it's not personal.
It's towards the presentation. Yeah, it seemed like the presentation could have been more interactive.
So that's, you know, that is the criticism piece here in this feedback sandwich.
But it's still not so intense, like as if I were if I said, for example, oh, your presentation should have you should have made your presentation more interactive.
That would have been very direct, right?
And, you know, I think that in American culture, in many workplaces, again, it depends on the workplace, we do expect this kind of indirect, you know, giving out of feedback.
I do think that, you know, we're a culture where...
You don't want to be super, super, super direct in your feedback, especially if you're focused on building those relationships at work.
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Exclusions apply. See details online. And then I did, you know, for the positive, I said, overall, I think you're doing a great job.
Overall. Overall. In general, right? In general.
That's the positive. And then you gave me a future suggestion.
What did you say? I said, why not try adding a few more points to your conclusion next time?
Right? So I'm saying, why not try? I like that.
Again, it's not as direct as saying, why don't you try?
Or you should try. You say, why not do this?
Right? Right. So again, these are all very strategic phrases, guys.
I really want you to write down these phrases today because if you just listen to today's episode and then you go to work and you try to use this, it's not going to work.
You need these phrases on a list that you can try to practice when you're ready to practice them, okay?
Yeah, for sure. And then, yeah, of course, I said next time, you know, and that's a good way to talk about, you know, in the future to show that, you know, you're talking about positive changes for the next time, not that you have to do them right this second.
Exactly. Exactly. So let's let's move on.
Let's skip over this next piece. Ways to make things less.
Actually, yeah, let's go into this piece.
The way that we make something less direct one other way.
We're just giving our listeners a whole bunch of tips today, a whole bunch of phrases and methods to make feedback less direct.
And one way to do that, guys, is to avoid the word you.
And how would we do that, for example, Michelle?
Mm hmm. Like, for example. Yeah, go ahead.
OK, well, you could say, oh, I noticed that some of the examples were missing a reference.
Right. Instead of saying I know that I noticed that you missed a reference in some of the examples.
Right. The examples were missing a reference.
That's different than saying you missed a reference in some of the examples.
You're saying the same thing, but you're taking the emphasis off of you.
You're not pointing your finger at the person.
Right. Right, right. Exactly. Exactly. Which is similar to kind of, you know, when earlier I said it seemed like the presentation could have been more interactive, you know, so directing the attention somewhere else, you're talking specifically about the work, not about the person doing the work.
You got it. This is a great skill for our listeners for today at their level.
I love this. And another example of that, how to take you out of it is some details got skipped over in the last presentation, right?
Instead of saying what? You skipped some details.
It's very different. The feeling is very different.
Right. It also kind of communicates a sense of maturity, I think.
Right. I think it sounds more mature to say some details got skipped over or were skipped over instead of saying you skipped over some details.
Right. That sounds immature and petty, I think.
Right. Right. It sounds like you're making it personal, even if you don't intend to make it personal.
Exactly. So again, this depends, guys, on your relationship with the person you're talking to, depends on your workplace, the values at your workplace, depends on a lot of things.
But we're just giving you some very neutral skills that you can use if you want to.
Okay. So I think we have too many vocabulary expressions today, Michelle, that we wanted to try to teach.
But why don't we... All right, let's just go through these last few, Michelle.
Here we go. What are some other ways to soften suggestions?
Okay. Well, you could say, for example, perhaps you could expand your theory.
Yes. Or you could say, maybe expanding the theory would help.
Ah. Or you could say, one idea is… And then… X, Y, Z. Yeah.
The idea. Or you could say, I wonder what would happen if… Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Or what's the last one?
You could say, what about adding more details?
Yeah. Yeah, like I like all of these phrases.
And I think if someone were helping me to come up with ideas, I would appreciate a suggestion if it were delivered in this way.
You know? Yeah, yeah, for sure. It seems very non-confrontational.
Like you're really just focusing on the work.
Yeah. Exactly. You're focusing on the work and it feels like a peaceful interaction.
Again, you know, I think maybe I'm a particularly sensitive person sometimes when it comes to feedback.
So, you know, take this with a grain of salt, guys.
But, you know, these are good skills to have.
So, okay. In this situation, Michelle, let's dive into it and show our listeners how it's done.
I'm an intern, Michelle, and you are my boss.
Okay. And we are at a final review meeting for my internship.
It's the end of the summer and I'm finishing up.
Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Here we go.
All right. So, hi, Ms. Kaplan. Thank you for taking the time to meet with me today to go over my work here.
It has been really rewarding interning for All Ears English.
Oh, my pleasure. We have really enjoyed having you here this summer.
We're going to miss you. Well, thank you.
Now, let's get into some details here. So your advisor wants to know about the thoroughness and accuracy of your work here.
Right. I would say that your presentation behind the camera has been strong and right in line with our brand's vision.
Oh, really? I'm happy to hear that. Yeah, well, something that could be done better is that you could have gone into more depth with some of your explanations.
Okay, I see. Overall, though, we have been really happy with your content work.
You may want to consider starting a blog yourself to keep up the skills you have learned.
Well, thank you for your time today, Ms.
Kaplan. It's been wonderful interning for your company.
Yeah, I did say, oh, you know, you could have done something, right?
So be careful because, yeah, if you wanted to take it away from saying, oh, something that could be done better is that you could have gone, into more depth right you could you could change that if you want to take it you know the attention a little bit away yeah how could you you could have said something like for example the explanations could have had more depth yes yes yeah now we're getting into some real nuances here guys yeah for our listeners they're ready for this good let's just recap this this conversation real quick and let's pull out a couple of really good phrases that we used here michelle i mean what did we use here Okay, well, I said, I would say that your presentation behind the camera has been strong and right in line with our brand's vision.
Mm hmm. Good. Good. So that's the feedback.
Right. And then again, we talked about the depth in the presentation.
The criticism was that something that could be done better is that you could have gone into more depth.
And again, we could have said the explanation explanations could have been deeper, could have had more depth.
Right. Right. And then what was the end?
The other part of the feedback sandwich, the bread, the other part.
So then I said, overall, though, we have been really happy with your content work.
And then I gave a future suggestion. I said, you may want to consider starting a blog yourself to keep up the skills you have learned.
Awesome. I love that. So that's really good, guys.
We've given you some really high-level phrases, and these phrases will pay dividends in the long run as you start to build the relationships at work that you want to build.
These are the phrases that are going to help you build those relationships.
Right now, you might be feeling lonely at work because you don't know how to do this, but But when you go ahead, grab the transcripts, you get your tutor on italki.
Again, you know, we have that special deal going through italki and you'll hear about that in the ad today.
That's the way to build these skills so that you can really, really build those connections.
That's why we're here. Absolutely. Okay, Michelle, I will see you next week.
All right. See you soon, Lindsay. Take care.
Bye. Bye. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional.
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