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Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeart Radio.
Good morning.
This is Laura.
Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to say, I love you more often.
There is no point in being stingy with these words with the people you love.
So why not let them know?
This episode is first airing around Valentine's Day.
We buy flowers and cards for our spouses and candy for our kids, all of which is great.
It's also great to show love for people in our lives every other time of year.
There are lots of ways to show love and all of those have their merit.
But honestly, one of the simplest ways is just to say it.
I began trying to consciously say these words more often with my kids a great many years ago, particularly when my eldest was starting school.
I realized that it was going to be quite easy to have the last words they heard from me each morning be something like why aren't your shoes in the mudroom?
What do you mean you don't have your homework?
You can't wear shorts in January, or something like that.
So while I still say all those things, I then try to end with love you as in.
Come on, you've got to get out the door to the bus right now.
Love you.
I'm not sure if they notice or care.
But if any of them does have a bad day for some reason or another, at least their mother's parting words to them were affectionate.
You might try saying these little words when you part from your loved ones too.
If you are not known for being particularly showy with emotions, you might start with some more demonstrative texts.
Send these people an emoji heart.
Then you can work up to words.
Your spouse and kids might be surprised, but they will probably be happy to get an I love you, thinking about you text on their lunch break.
I am not sure there's a good reason not to say I love you frequently.
It's not like it means less just because you say it more often.
It also isn't an invitation to downplay or write off bad behavior.
You could absolutely tell a kid.
The school principal had to call me today about the incident in class.
I love you no matter what you do.
I am also taking away your iPad.
Until you can show that you can be trusted to live up to your obligations to your school community.
And if you and your spouse happen to be in a rough patch well, saying I love you frequently is a down payment on your future happiness.
As in, I love you and I trust we are going to work this out.
Anyway, if you are not particularly effusive, why not use Valentine's Day as an excuse to get started?
Sure, the candy and hearts are all commercial, but it feels a little more normal to talk about love on this holiday.
Then you can use that newfound showiness to keep going.
See if you can say those little words once a day to the people you love most.
Then, see if you can sometimes say them more than once.
You just might find that you feel more loving the more you talk about loving people.
And, it tends to be reflected, you will feel more loved as well.
In the meantime, this is Laura saying, Thanks for listening.
And here's to making the most of our time.
Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast.
If you've got questions, ideas or feedback, you can reach me at Laura at LauraVanderkam.com.
Before Breakfast is a production of iHeart Media.
For more podcasts from iHeart Media, please visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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