Hey Max, Caroline told everyone the good news about you going back to take that American history test.
Good for you.
Yeah, I started studying last night and, on behalf of all white people, I would like to apologize for everything ever.
Well, apology accepted for everything ever, except for slavery and the gap.
Here, Max, I brought you the history book which I'm studying from for my citizenship test.
Aren't babies automatically citizens?
I don't know why I wrote for you.
Here, your country has a very rich past, unlike Korea, which had its past stolen by the Japanese.
Khan, we are not talking about European history.
We are talking about American history.
Oof, you're going to be working here forever.
Good luck, lady.
Okay, Max, I've come up with a way for you to work and study at the same time.
Like when you shop and steal at the same time.
I know.
When they show it to me on those security cameras, I'm always impressed.
I mean, I really don't know why anyone else is doing it.
Max, pick up a burrito for table eight.
Jeez, I just walked in.
Why do I have to follow this burrito drama?
First, Caroline says I have to quiz you every time you come to the window.
So, who was the sexually virile male pop singer responsible for the hit song, Jessie's Girl?
Rick Springfield.
Burrito's all yours, Smarty.
Oleg, no.
You have to ask questions from the flashcards I provided.
They're color-coordinated by century and subdivided by president.
Don't look at me like that, Max.
I'm a fun person.
I taught myself the Dougie.
Okay, here goes.
Which amendment to the United States Constitution guarantees a woman's right to... vote?
Wait, women can vote?
So, when you say women can vote, you mean like besides for American Idol?
Next, you think you're not smart, but you are.
You just need to come up with little tricks to help jog your memory.
My memory doesn't jog.
I've smoked so much pot, it's in one of those hospitals learning to walk again.
What was the Great Compromise?
You mean besides you moving in with me?
It created the two houses of Congress.
Hooty-hoo!
Next question.
What was the movement against the sale or drinking of alcohol called?
The bowel movement?
No, the temperance movement.
And don't mention the bathroom.
I've had to pee since we passed that last town that used to make something.
So just go to the bathroom.
What are you so afraid of?
The bathroom.
I will use a public bathroom.
I will use a public bus.
But I will not use the public bathroom on a public bus.
Next card.
No, give me a Twizzler.
I know enough.
No candies.
Study harder.
You're looking at a solid D. Well, my grades should match my boobs.
Next question.
OK.
In what city was the Constitution written?
No idea.
Philadelphia?
Oh, damn it.
I almost said that.
It's right there.
Philadelphia makes cheesesteaks.
The Constitution is cheesy.
Why do I doubt myself?
How much further?
I thought Rhode Island was supposed to be a tiny state.
When are we stopping?
Well, we have to pass Cranston, Providence, and then our stop is Hope.
Wait, Max, you were born in a town called Hope?
Well, just outside help.
And success and money.
Oh, there's no hope for me.
I have to pee so badly.
I'm going in.
Leave the Twizzlers.
Here, study.
Oh, my God.
You know the toilet isn't just there as a suggestion.