The need to be perfect is something that is some sort of an ideal that just keeps you stuck and prevents you from taking action or speaking up or doing things that you want to do, like applying for that job or connecting with people or starting that business.
Hey.
You're listening to the Influency Podcast.
I'm Hadar, your host, a pronunciation expert, fluency coach, and a proud non-native speaker.
With over 16 years of experience teaching, I am here to share with you all my secrets on how to show up in English clearly, with confidence and freedom.
On this podcast, I'll provide step-by-step strategies lessons, stories and practical tips to keep you inspired and motivated on your English journey.
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Hi everyone, it's Hadar.
And today I'm going to share with you five things that I believe we should all leave behind in 2025, as we're entering 2026.
So I'm recording this video at the end of 2025.
Hashtag I can't believe time flew by so quickly this year.
And I was thinking about the things that don't serve me.
And I wanted to offer you an invitation to leave those things behind you in 2025 so you can step into 2026 feeling more confident, more free and more expressive.
So English can become more joyful.
A lot of mores, because we want more.
If you're new to my channel, my name is Hadar.
I'm a non-native speaker of English and my work is all about helping you get the tools and the strategies you need to improve your clarity and your fluency, but also how to change the way you think and the way you feel in English, with mindset, work and different perspectives that I share, so you can really tap into your full potential in English.
If you want to learn more with me, go to my website at hadarshamishcom for hundreds of different lessons.
And you can also follow me on social media, where I share daily lessons about pronunciation, mindset and fluency strategy.
Now, before we get started, I want to invite you to download my free confidence challenge.
It's a seven day email challenge where every day, I'm going to share with you some insights and a small activity to do to build your confidence in English.
It is fantastic and it's absolutely free.
So click the link below to download it.
So now let's talk about the things we want to let go of, to leave behind in 2025.
And the first thing is the need to be perfect.
The need to get it right.
I often talk about how perfectionism can actually kill your fluency, but not just your fluency any type of progress or achievements, or Sticking to your goals or anything that you want to achieve in life, especially if you want to do it while feeling fulfilled and happy and content and not always feeling bad about yourself and like you're not good enough.
This idea of doing things perfectly, getting it right, not making mistakes, is so destructive because, first of all, it makes us procrastinate, because we feel like, oh okay, I need to do it perfectly.
And if I can't do it perfectly, I might as well not do it at all.
And we do it with projects that we want to achieve or to complete, but also with speaking, right?
Think about it.
How many things have you not said because they weren't perfect in your head?
And the result is that these things were never said and you were waiting for the right opportunity, but that opportunity probably hasn't come.
So the idea of waiting for the perfect moment, waiting for the perfect time for your English to be ready for the perfect sentence, without mistakes or without hesitation,
That is not going to happen.
We need to let go of that because perfection is overrated and it's the killer of fluency.
And if you want to really start feeling expressive and really like you are connected to yourself and authentic when speaking, you gotta let go of perfection.
You, you gotta let go of the need to be perfect, because even when you are trying to be perfect, i bet that it's not perfect, because perfection is impossible in a way.
So when you think about it, then the need to be perfect is something that is some sort of an ideal that just keeps you stuck and prevents you from taking action or speaking up or doing things that you want to do, like applying for that job or connecting with people or starting that business.
So let's do our best in 2026. to let go of the need to be perfect.
The second thing is to let go of the fear of judgment.
Now, it definitely connects to the need to be perfect, because we need to be perfect, because we're afraid of judgment.
But I decided to give it its own category because the fear of judgment is so controlling of our lives.
What are people gonna think?
It's so controlling not just in the sense of you not doing things or waiting for things to be perfect, but also in how you identify your true self.
Because when we're afraid of judgment, What ends up happening is that we're not being authentic to ourselves.
We constantly think about what people expect of us and how people want us to show up.
And instead of saying what we think and what we feel and showing up the way we are and being our true self and being authentic, instead of that, we're constantly thinking about how people expect us to behave or what they want us to say.
And then we do that instead of what we want because we're afraid of what people are going to say if we show up authentically to how we feel and who we are.
So it's not just about not doing things and not speaking enough.
It's really about not being your true self, that fear of judgment.
And of course, a huge part of it is staying safe, right?
Not doing the thing that will require you to get out of your comfort zone.
Not doing the thing that will make you feel more vulnerable because you might get judged.
And let me tell you this.
Receiving judgment.
Let's say you do something and someone says something about it.
They have an opinion and it's not a good opinion.
This is such a beautiful moment for you to grow.
And so that you can understand how to separate yourself from their thoughts and what they expect of you.
Because when we receive judgment, It's such a beautiful moment for us to be like wait, but this is what I want.
And if they don't like what I want or what I say, it doesn't mean that I'm not good enough.
It doesn't mean that I'm doing something wrong.
It just means that they don't like it, but it doesn't mean that I shouldn't be doing it or saying it.
And only when you face that conflict.
When you receive criticism or judgment, that's how you can grow.
If you are living your life, just pleasing everyone, receiving no judgment, you're not growing.
And you're not doing what you want to do because you're doing what other people want you to do.
So at the end of the day, judgment is not bad.
It's an opportunity to clarify what it is that you want and to fight for it, and to do it despite people's opinions.
So don't shy away from judgment.
Let go of the fear of judgment and step into being yourself, doing what you want with respect, saying what you want to say with respect, and not worrying about what people are gonna say, because they will have opinions, they might judge you and in 2026, you're not gonna care.
Okay, Moving on to the next thing, which is letting go of things that do not work, especially in English, because now we're going to talk about English.
I want you to think about all the things that you've been doing out of habit when it comes to learning and practicing and speaking.
And I want you to make a list of things that don't bring you joy, that feel tedious, that feel ineffective, that feel like they're keeping you in a plateau stuck.
Maybe you've improved, but now you're stuck.
I want you to make a list of all those things that don't make you feel joyful about practicing or speaking English, and I want you to let go of them.
And I want you to start new things.
I want you to try new things.
I want you to explore different methods, different ways of practice.
All of this is possible.
There's so many ways to learn and practice and speak and enjoy conversations.
And maybe if something hasn't worked for you in 2025, it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you.
It just means that it hasn't worked for you or maybe it has and now it's no longer working.
What got you here won't get you there.
So in 2026, you are going to try new things.
You're not going to just base everything, everything that you do, on what you already know.
No, you're gonna.
You're going to explore, not just in english okay, but that's you know.
Like you, you take what you need from this conversation.
Now i have one caveat.
Sometimes the actual practice feels tedious.
Don't stop practicing, okay.
I'm not saying let go practice because you know it doesn't work for you.
No, you still need to practice.
You need to do the work, but within that, explore what works and what doesn't.
You know like.
Try to be super objective.
Think as if you were to give guidance or feedback or coaching to a friend.
What would you say?
So that's another thing you're going to leave behind in 2025 and let go of it going into 2026.
The next thing is comparison.
Stop comparing yourself to others.
Definitely when it comes to English, but When it comes to anything, your starting point is not the same as others.
Your experience in life is not the same as others.
What's available to you, whether it's time resources money environment, it's not the same as others.
Nothing is the same.
Do not compare yourself to others.
Do not compare your English.
Do not compare your achievements.
Do not compare their social media platform, do not compare yourself to others, because it is not helpful.
It only makes you feel not good enough, especially if you compare yourself to others when, where you think about all the things that are working for them, all the things that they're really good at and you're not.
How fluent they are, how great their accent is, right.
So when, when this is how your brain works, it immediately thinks oh, but i'm not there yet, you know.
And then there is this story about all the work that i've done and this is where i'm at, or i'll never be able to get to where they are, because i don't live in an english-speaking country, because i speak spanish german russian japanese, whatever that story is.
So comparing yourself to others is not helpful because it generates this feeling of not being good enough.
And when you feel not good enough, then it creates this negative emotion where you're like what's the point?
And then you tend to avoid doing the work, slack on your practice, distract yourself, procrastinate and all the things that prevent us from doing the things that we want or reaching the results that we're after.
So, at the end of 2025, you're going to let go of comparison and you're going to step into a year where you center yourself around what it is that you want to achieve, and only around what you have already achieved.
And that's it.
And when you see someone being successful in their English or their work or whatnot, just think about the possibility that it could be your reality as well.
So, instead of comparing yourself to them, use that as inspiration, as motivation, as something to look forward to, as an idea of what it is that you want for yourself.
That's it. but not to feel bad.
We're gonna let go of the feeling bad, okay?
We've had enough of it.
We're done.
We're done.
The last thing is you're going to let go of your old story about your English and who you are in English.
Your story, The narrative that you have in your head, is the result of the thousand thoughts that you have daily around who you are and specifically about your English.
It's the actions that you take.
It's the feeling that you have before talking, while talking, and after talking.
It's the entire speaking experience and who you are in English.
All of it connects to the story you tell yourself. about your English.
So, for example, if the story you tell yourself is that English is hard and that it's never going to work out, and I've tried it so many times before, and if the story you tell yourself is that I'm not a person who communicates well in English, or the story you tell yourself is that Every time I speak, people judge me,
That story needs to stay in 2025.
Because if that story makes you feel shame humiliation frustration disappointment, feeling anxious, feeling sad, bad and all of those negative thoughts that we sometimes feel the burden of speaking English it's a burden then it's no longer serving you.
Now, changing your story is not going to immediately change your English, but letting go of that story and stepping into a new story, a story where you are constantly working on your English.
You are a fluent speaker.
You know how to express yourself, even if it takes you more time.
People are interested in what you have to say, even though You may not use all the fancy words.
Whatever that looks like for you, that new story that you want to tell, it's going to impact your confidence, your willingness to do things, the actions that you take and, most importantly, how you feel when you speak English, before you speak English and after you speak English.
So letting go of that old story and creating a new story for yourself, a story that makes you feel empowered and therefore allows you to take action, is what we want, is what you should want for yourself in 2026.
So how about you identify that story that holds you back?
You leave it behind and in 2026, You create a new story for yourself.
And I'm inviting you to journal about it and write a few thoughts and a few ideas about who that person is.
Who is the new you?
Who is the 2026 you?
And what is that person's story?
And what does it look like?
What does it feel like when you are tapping into your full potential?
All right, that's it.
I wish you a beautiful, glorious, healthy, successful, happy new year.
And I hope that you can let go of all the things that we talked about, and more, all the things that you don't want in your life.
I hope you can let go of them and leave them behind in 2025.
Whatever happens in 2026, whether you achieve your dreams and goals or not, as long as you do your best and you show up like yourself and you let go of all the things that get in the way of you being you, that's all that matters.
I fully believe in you.
I want you to know that and if you need a little bit of my help to start 2026 with a bang and to start it strong, i have a start strong challenge that is absolutely free, so you can sign up for the waitlist to be notified when we open the challenge, or maybe registration is already open when you watch this video, so you can already join.
Thank you so much and I will see you next week, next year, in the next video.
Bye!
