I think you're going to make that work.
Oh god.
Oh, this is actually handy.
Actually, that's never been done before.
Hi Amelia.
Hi, oh my god, thank you.
It's so lovely to see you.
I saw you the other day.
Did you?
On a bus.
Oh, yes.
Yeah.
I remember I was on the bus and you were just standing at the window.
No.
Awkwardly.
Your face was imprinted on the bus.
Mm-hmm.
And then before that, you were in my dream.
Really?
What happened?
Essentially, this is our second date.
Does your wife know that you're on a date right now?
She does know that.
She does?
Yes.
Okay, great.
And the only reason I'm allowed here is that, you know, she's your number one fan.
Ooh!
Mm-hmm.
Oh, my God.
That is right.
Brooke from Gossip Girl loves you.
Serena.
Serena.
Blair.
Blair.
Serena.
Anything that has a Brooke.
Do you want some ketchup?
Oh, yes, please.
Where do you like it?
On top?
Just on the side.
I don't like it everywhere.
Okay.
It's too much.
I'm a control freak.
I don't know.
I can't have it everywhere.
Thanks for letting me pour for you as a control freak.
I'd say that is a great sign for our day.
You've got a journalism degree.
Yes.
So do I. Do you?
So similar.
But you actually turned it into a living.
Yeah.
I ignored it.
You didn't.
No, no, no.
Deadpool vs. Wolverine.
So that's the sequel to Deadpool 2 and Deadpool and then, what was it, Detective Pikachu?
Well, no, nothing to do with Detective Pikachu.
And I probably come to think of it could have been a little bit more creative with the titles.
Well, hindsight's a beautiful thing.
It is, I know.
Isn't it?
Yeah.
So how much do you bench?
No, not much.
I'll show very little go.
I'm not like a- That's part of being a superhero.
No, I'm pretty much out of testosterone, thankfully.
Oh, God.
That shit is gross.
Hugh, though, oof, that guy's a beast.
Could you bench me?
Probably.
Probably?
Okay.
Yeah.
Cool.
Yes, he could do a lot of things.
I didn't mean like that.
I just meant that he could probably lift you places.
So I've wanted to have someone to lift me places?
I heard that, like Wolverines, when they're frightened they like a kind of smell comes out of their anal glands.
Was that quite tough like filming with?
With a method actor?
Yes.
Weird.
A little bit weird.
Do you know that the wolverine is the largest member of the weasel family?
And also, did you know that their breeding season is between April and August?
Ditto.
Which is like perfect timing.
Yeah.
I can't even make love unless the weather is warm.
No.
And there's a light northwesterly breeze coming in around 10 knots.
Yeah.
Vivaldi playing on low.
It's very specific.
And a mouthful of chicken.
So you were I voted people's sexiest man alive in what, 2010?
How does it feel to have let yourself go?
Right, hanging on by a thread.
This is weirdly the best date I've ever had.
Yeah, I was thinking that too.
Is it okay to talk on a date, like talk and eat?
Yeah.
Really?
I do it all the time.
Okay.
Well, I do all the time.
I actually don't know if it's okay.
Were you brought up with a lot of manners like that?
No.
I was manners.
No elbows on the table.
Do not talk with the mouth full.
We only ate dinner in front of the television.
Oh, my God.
We could never have.
No, we never ate as a family.
Really?
Yeah.
And you're struggling to find one true love.
I don't understand.
I met Gordon Ramsay today.
Did you?
Yes.
I'm not trying to name drop, but I met Gordon Ramsay and Tilly, his daughter.
Well, were you cooking with them?
I did.
Yeah, we did.
Yeah, we cooked with them.
Oh, cool.
Well, glad you had fun doing that.
No, no, this is much better.
Don't talk about other content series around me.
It's not appropriate.
Absolutely right.
I apologize and I won't do it again.
Is this sexy?
Well, the lead poisoning is not going to look sexy in about six months from now.
I'm pretty sure this is, yeah.
Is this... Technically adamantium, but... Okay.
Yeah.
You know what?
And we could... No, don't do that.
Wow.
Have you done second dates?
I'm not at liberty to say.
Oh.
So I can't actually disclose that kind of information.
Do you have a favorite?
Well, apart from this one.
Don't worry.
I'm literally dead inside.
I don't care.
Okay, cool.
Who's your favorite?
Oh, seriously.
My favorite date... Paul Meskel.
We'll leave that out.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'm not producing this.
So what do you think of the Wolverine haircut?
Like seriously, like be honest with me.
Yeah, it's problematic.
I was thinking that.
I didn't want to say it, but I'm glad you said it first.
I think the ozone layer is mainly due to him and the hairspray.
A lot of hairspray to get it up there.
Seriously, I was thinking.
Rain, it's a problem.
It just goes flat.
Because really all the power's in the hair.
Did you sing as Wolverine?
No.
Oh, damn.
I'm going to slice him.
I'm going to dice him.
I was missing a trick there.
Wolverine the musical?
Come on, you'd watch it.
Come on, surely you'd pitch that?
No.
I am now, though.
Thanks, Amelia.
Was it tough to get him to agree to do the film, Hugh?
A lot of people think that it was my badgering that got him to do the movie.
It wasn't.
It was his own midlife crisis.
I heard you would turn up unannounced outside his house.
I've lived for four months under his bed.
What, so you don't think me and Ryan are a good match?
I don't think he's a good match for anyone, even Blake.
I tell her that all the time, you know, and she agrees.
But they're sort of, you know, it's kids, it's a whole thing.
I know.
They're locked into it.
Honesty is really nice to have in a friendship.
I don't actually speak to him.
Oh, okay.
Well, you get your manager to speak to him.
Yeah, I mean, I was AI in the movie.
I never was on the set with him.
Right.
The reputation is terrible.
I mean, it comes across very charming funny, you know, in the way, like Ted Bundy was apparently charming.
Yeah, now you're saying that I'm kind of thinking about our interaction a bit differently, because he was smiling, he did have really nice glistening eyes, but really maybe he's evil.
No, maybe.
It's pretty clear.
Who would make the better boyfriend, Deadpool or Wolverine?
Wolverine is just emotionally stunted in almost every way, shape and form.
Although in this movie, in one scene, he has more lines than he's ever had in any one of the movies possibly combined.
I've never seen them.
Oh.
I've never seen the Wolverine ones.
I don't even think the editor of those movies saw them.
Did he try and kiss you?
No, he didn't.
He tried to kiss me as I was walking.
Are you kidding me?
It was... But he knows that I'm on a date with you and he tried to kiss you.
I felt unsafe.
Was it tough then to say yes to doing Wolverine Deadpool?
That was a hard decision to make.
In truth, I rang him.
Okay.
Right, so you're playing some mind games now.
You're a bit toxic.
I can be a little toxic, but in a sexy way.
Okay.
What's your last name?
De Moldenberg.
De Moldenberg, which is... Derivates from... I don't know where it's from.
Do you think you'll change your name when you get married?
You'll keep it.
My partner has to take my name.
Isn't it a bit crazy?
So if, I don't want to, but if, so be Hugh de Moldenburg.
Hugh de Moldenburg.
That actually sounds good.
If he senses that you and I had a successful date, he will hurt me.
Well, I heard you're going to Brazil.
I am.
To get a butt lift.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I've always wanted one.
Yeah, I always thought that you needed one.
I do need one.
Yeah.
But I thought if I'm going to get a Brazilian butt lift, get it in Brazil.
Brazil.
Okay, well, I'll see you there then.
Brian and I are going to get a two-for-one.
Are you coming?
Yeah, but not for the butt lift.
Okay.
Just for the vibes.
I don't know what the recovery is on the butt lift.
I think it's quite hard on the butt.
So when I see you, I may be laying on the front.
Okay, that's fine for me.
Is that okay?
Yeah.
Okay.
It's my favorite.
