Please move.
That sounds kind of polite, right like when someone is standing in your way at the grocery store with a cart full of food.
All you want to do is just grab some yogurt real quick.
But they're standing there looking at all the options, maybe reviewing a recipe on their phone and checking something off their list.
But those words, please move, they're not at all polite in English.
And what about, excuse me, please move?
Nope, it's still rude.
In fact I wouldn't even say that to my sister if she were on the metro and I wanted her to move over just a little bit so I could sit next to her.
So why is this simple statement so rude in English, and what are the more polite alternatives that you can use for situations just like this in your daily life?
The truth is those two words.
They sound like a command, and even with the addition of the word please, it still sounds demanding and pushy, as if someone else's time schedule or needs are more important than your own.
So whether you want someone to create space for you at a presentation where people are sitting elbow to elbow, Or you just quickly want to get through a crowded space at the airport.
The phrases English speakers actually use in these moments, things like scoot over, squeeze past and slip by are not taught in most English courses.
So that's exactly what we're going to do today.
Now there's one thing we need to know before we learn specific polite phrases to get someone to move over or create space.
We have to understand how to shift a rude demand into a polite request.
All we need for this are some small little words like just, a bit, and a little.
These words make a huge difference in the tone of our request.
When we combine them with words like modals such as could and would, along with sorry or excuse me, we have everything we need to appropriately soften the language.
As a result, an abrupt, rude please move becomes sorry.
Could you move over just a bit?
You're going to hear these words again and again in requests that we share to get someone to move, to indicate that you want to move past someone or to reach around someone, like when you want to grab your coffee and leave quickly at a busy coffee shop.
Before we get into the specific phrases today, I want to mention one important thing.
Today, you're going to walk away knowing exactly what to say in those moments.
If you want that same confidence, knowing that you have the right words in any situation, I've got a free training for you.
It's called Get the Confidence to Say What You Want in English.
It's a free English fluency training that I've shared with more than 20000 people, and I'd love to share it with you as well.
I'll be sure to share a link in the episode description below.
And now let's start with our first common situation.
You're somewhere crowded and you just need a little bit more space, like in a movie theater, on a city bus or in a waiting room at the doctor's office.
Maybe someone is sitting or standing a little too close, or they're simply taking up too much space.
In those moments, here's what you could say.
First, could you scoot over just a bit?
This verb, to scoot, means to slide or wiggle your body a short distance, and we use this when we want someone to move just a few inches or centimeters, so there's just a bit more space for someone to sit down or slide by.
Another word that we often use here is scooch.
Could you scooch over just a bit?
For example, on a crowded city bus, someone might say would you mind scooching over just a bit so my mom can sit down?
Or do you mind moving over just a little?
Would you mind moving over just a bit?
And finally, could you slide down a bit?
This one with the phrasal verb to slide down is always used for seated situations, like people sitting on a bench in a waiting room or in a movie theater.
I want you to pay attention to those examples.
In each case, do you notice that we're using could or would in almost all the examples, or we're using a play alternative with do you mind?
In each case, The request is polite and warm.
To truly understand this, I want to walk through a quick real life scenario.
Imagine for a moment that you're on a subway during rush hour.
Your stop is coming up next, but someone is standing right in front of you.
And once those doors open, you need to get through those doors quickly.
In this situation, you might say, excuse me, could you scoot over just a bit?
My stop is next.
Adding on a reason like so my mom can sit down or because my stop is next contributes to the politeness of the request.
You don't need to go into a lot of detail here.
All you need is a quick, simple explanation.
Now, sometimes the problem isn't that someone is too close.
Instead, the problem is that they are completely blocking your path and you need to get through.
This happens all the time in busy places like a grocery store or airports, and it can feel totally awkward if you don't know what to say.
So here's how to handle these situations smoothly.
One you could say could i just squeeze past you?
I love this expression to squeeze past?
It means that you're trying to make your body as small as possible, like squeezing a balloon to flatten it so that it can fit through a small gap.
I have to thank my niece for reminding me of this common English expression, which is particularly helpful when you want to politely move around someone.
As an alternative to this polite request, you could also say sorry, I'm just going to squeeze past you real quick.
Now, for a more straightforward approach, you could say, excuse me, could I get by you?
Or excuse me, could I just get through here?
These two are especially useful. when someone is blocking an entrance or an exit.
And here's a couple more.
Sorry, could I just get past you?
Or do you mind if I slip past you?
With each of these, your goal isn't to get in front of someone.
Instead, it's to move around them so that you can keep going on your way.
So again, let's take a look at how we might use one of these in a real situation.
Imagine you're getting ready to leave your apartment building and your neighbor is in the narrow hallway with a bunch of grocery bags and they're blocking your way.
But you need to get through.
In that moment, to encourage them to move slightly out of your way, you could say excuse me, could I just squeeze past you.
And now our last set of phrases is for when you need to reach past someone to grab something.
Maybe it's something on a shelf at the grocery store, or perhaps you're reaching for a door handle, or you want to get something that is across from you at the dinner table.
Most of the time, reaching across someone is considered a bit rude because it invades their personal space.
On top of that, reaching your arm out on a crowded table, for example, could knock over a glass of water or a stack of documents.
So it's usually more polite to ask someone to pass you what you need.
For example, could you pass me the stapler or could you pass the salt and pepper?
But sometimes reaching across or around someone is more practical.
Maybe their hands are full of grocery bags or they're deeply focused on something else.
So in those moments, here's what you could say.
First, sorry, can I just reach past you for a second?
If, for example, there's something specific you want, you could add.
Sorry, can I just reach past you for the salt and pepper?
Or, do you mind if I reach across?
Pardon me, could I grab that real quick?
You'll notice that these phrases often start with sorry rather than excuse me.
Both work, but sorry, feels a bit more natural here because again you're reaching into someone's personal space.
That word sorry adds a little bit of extra warmth.
In this situation, I want you to imagine that you're in a meeting room at work.
Someone is sitting right next to the stack of handouts and you want to get one before the meeting starts.
On the table, they have their laptop and coffee spread all around them.
And they're obviously very focused on something.
You don't want to interrupt.
So in that moment, you could say, I'm so sorry, could I just reach past you for a second?
Or pardon me, could I just grab one of those handouts real quick?
These moments on the subway, in the hallway, in the grocery store or in the meeting room.
They don't have to feel stressful or awkward.
And we certainly don't need to use rude, inappropriate demands.
All you need is a quick sorry or excuse me, a modal like could or would and those small words such as just or a bit.
Using that language together is all it takes to transition from a rude demand into a polite request to get someone to move in the way that you need.
As always, if you found today's lesson helpful to you, I would love for you to subscribe or follow wherever you're watching or listening from today.
Thank you so much for joining me and I look forward to next time.
