This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 2, 5 Words to Eliminate from Your Business English Emails.
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Okay, on Facebook. So the article is five common words that make you sound less confident in emails.
And, you know, we know that a big part of connection, which is what we believe in here at All Ears English, is confidence, right?
We want to make sure that we can really connect with people.
So we have to let out that confident vibe.
And I think our listeners often ask us, how to do that, not just in speaking, but also in emails.
But the five words that we're going to talk about today, actually, I believe that they create the same problems in speaking that they do in an email.
They make you sound less confident. What do you think, Michelle?
Yeah, I definitely agree with that. So I think that we should go through them.
Yeah, this article, it's really interesting.
It's by Lily Herman and it's on themuse.com if you want to check it out.
So yeah, anyway. We'll try to post a link to the article in the show notes of this episode, allearsenglish.com slash three.
What's this episode, Michelle? 330, oh, 340, I believe.
Yeah. Sorry, 341. Yeah. So let's go through them, Michelle.
So what are they? What are the words? And then we'll talk about whether we agree or not.
What's the first word that makes you sound less confident in an email?
The first word is just. Yeah. And we've, well, let's go back to it after.
Let's just read number two. Number two is hopefully, right?
Hopefully. Number three is actually. Good.
And number four is kind of. And number five is sorry.
Yeah. All of these words are kind of, I don't know, Michelle, what are these words have in common in your mind?
They kind of, I just said kind of. They take away from what you're saying.
They're indirect. Yeah, they're kind of unnecessary, aren't they?
Yeah. And I just said kind of again, too.
Yeah. They're unnecessary. They take away from what you're saying.
They do make you sound less direct, but they're not really adding any value to what you're saying.
And to start off, I mean, this word just, we've touched on this a couple of times, Michelle, when we talked about gender, the different genders, and we talked about how women tend to use this more.
I find myself going to Starbucks and I'll order a coffee.
I'll walk up and I'll say, oh, I'll just have a tall, dark, you know, dark roast.
Just. Just. Why do I say just? Yeah, it's so interesting.
And, you know, we've actually even talked about... you know, using wanted, right?
I just wanted. But it's interesting, you know, because we use it all the time, but I don't know why.
Yeah. And it's interesting. I mean, you know, for example, if we start the email, what they warn against in this article is starting emails with things like this, just checking in, or I just wanted to ask a question.
I just wanted to drop a message. You know, things like that kind of, they take away from, they do make you sound less confident.
And I've had times when I've been texting someone that I'm dating, for example, and I'm about to write, oh, I just wanted to say hi.
And I think, no, no, no, I don't. I shouldn't say just because it makes me sound less confident.
Right, right. So really, you should just say hi.
Right. Just say hi. Be more direct. And it's also just simpler to say hi.
Hello. Right. You know, and I never thought about this before.
And but it's just it's just. It's so true.
And I think that we need to work on sounding much more confident.
And I totally agree with you, Lindsay, that this is not just for emails.
Yeah. And so just, oh my gosh, I just did it again.
I can't believe it. So to reiterate, when you say, I'm just checking in, I just wanted to ask you a question, you're making it sound like you're not as important.
You're not an important person. Like you're not important.
You know, you're kind of making it sound like you're bothering someone.
Right. Or you believe that. Okay. Kind of like you're like tapping on their shoulder, but like with this really hesitant face, you know?
Right. I'm sorry to bother you. Please, you have a moment for me.
I'm only a poor, I'm a poor pauper or something like that, right?
Yeah. I like that. You deserve the attention.
You're such an actress, Michelle. You're an actress at heart, I think.
But okay, let's go on to the next one. So the next one was hopefully.
Now, what's the problem with this? So yeah, you, you, why are you hopeful, right?
Yeah. You should expect things, right? You deserve it.
Yeah, yeah. So in the article, she says, if you're telling someone that you'll hopefully get something done, right?
So for example, if you say, hopefully I'll have this done by Tuesday, if you say that in a business email, you're kind of saying, as the person who wrote this article suggested, you're kind of saying that you don't have any control over what happens.
Almost like we can't count on you. We can't rely on you.
So instead of saying, hopefully this will be done by Friday, Just say, this will be done by Friday.
Right, right. And that's what I was saying.
Like, yeah, like expect it. Like this is like you're confident in it, right?
As this person says, apparently the author's mentor said, oh, you shouldn't have to be hopeful for anything, right?
You should know, right? You should be confident.
So people can expect it and can rely on you.
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Exclusions apply? See details online. Now, these are such subtle nuances in our speech that, you know, even as native speakers, we need to pay attention to this.
You know, this is something that I want to start paying more attention to.
I think I commit these errors sometimes.
But, you know, our listeners, as our listeners want to push up to that advanced level, it's really interesting for you guys to start to look at this and notice when native speakers are using these and decide whether or not you want to put this into your speech patterns or whether from the beginning you want to leave them out.
Right, right. Exactly. So the third one is actually, actually.
What's the problem here? You know, I feel like this has become a filler word almost.
And I mean, I use it on this show a lot.
So I feel like I don't have the right to even say we shouldn't use it, but it is kind of annoying.
Right? I mean, you know, we just we say it all the time, right?
When do you say actually? Um, it's a good question.
Um, when do I say actually, I know that I say that all the time.
I actually, I actually think that we should do this, right?
Why can't I just say, oh, I think that we should do this, right?
Yeah. Yeah. It's almost like, again, it makes you sound less confident.
My web guy, my web developer uses this word actually all the time in emails and it makes him sound as a man.
It makes him sound less confident. Right.
Especially less confident as a man when he uses this.
So, guys, just try to avoid it. Don't put it in if it's not needed.
Just say what you want to say. Right. Exactly.
So, yeah, you can always go through. I, you know, try and edit a lot of my emails before I send them out.
And now I'm going to go through and delete some of these words.
Yeah. Okay. Number four, kind of. Kind of.
Yeah. That's really, you're just, you're backing off from what you really want to say.
You're kind of, ha ha ha, you're going halfway.
Yeah. As this article says, the article says you're not totally committing or have no idea what's going on.
That's from the article. Right. If you say, for example, I kind of feel like we should change the theme of this episode, right?
What do you feel? Do you think we should change it or not?
It's too wishy-washy. It's too vague. Right, right, right.
Wishy-washy. That's a good word, Michelle.
Wishy-washy. Yeah, I love that word. Yeah, commit, commit, right?
And, you know, even if you aren't, there's a phrase, fake it till you make it, right?
Yeah, yeah, exactly. What does that mean?
It means even if you're not feeling 100% about something or you don't feel completely confident, if you act confident, people will believe you're confident and eventually you're going to get there.
That's right. Yep. You got it. So try to avoid this if you can.
Number five is sorry. Using sorry. What's wrong with this?
You don't need to apologize for things that you don't need to apologize for.
Yeah. Now, this is sticky. This is a really sticky situation because last year we did an episode when my former co-host was on the show. she had a very strong belief that we say sorry too often.
And then we had a response from one of our listeners, from my student from Brazil.
She got quite upset because she was worried that this, we were giving people the impression that we don't need to be polite.
I do believe it's very important to be polite and to be kind of, you know, in integrity, right?
Of course, when you've done something wrong, it's good to apologize.
But this is different, right? This is kind of when you don't need to apologize for something.
Right, exactly. Just to feel like... People just throw it in wherever, right?
And some things aren't so serious that you need to apologize for them.
You need to do the right thing, but don't feel the need to always apologize.
This makes me think of in England, you know, that kind of becomes a slang.
When I was in London in January, you know, everybody, sorry, sorry, sorry for everything.
And that's really just... That's a part of their culture.
And I actually, I feel like I fit right in because I think I apologize a lot.
But I shouldn't. It's very cultural. And here, I think we do it a lot too.
But especially when it comes to something with business, I think you might sound a little bit, you know, weak.
Week, yeah. That's what I was going to say.
I mean, the example that she uses in this article is when you're trying to arrange a time and someone suggests Monday.
And in the email, you write back and you say, sorry, I can't do Monday.
Does Tuesday work? Why say sorry? Just say, I can't do Monday.
Does Tuesday work? So that's the kind of thing where you really don't need to say sorry in that case.
Just say that you're not available on Monday.
But you know what the funny thing is? I'm reading these and I'm thinking –
Well, if somebody just wrote to me, I can't do Monday, does Tuesday work?
I might feel that they're being a little bit abrupt.
Yeah. No, that's true. It's tricky. I mean, people need to get to know you also beyond your emails, right?
So the idea, the point of an email is hopefully not just to email with someone forever.
Hopefully, we want to eventually have a meeting with them, meet them somehow and know them as a person, right?
But I do think that these words make us feel a little bit weak.
I mean, I basically agree with the article.
Do you agree with the article, basically, Michelle?
Yeah. I do agree with the article very much so.
I would say that the number five was the one that made me think just for a second because I'm thinking about being on the receiving end of these emails.
And, you know, sometimes an email, even if the person doesn't mean to sound a certain way, they sometimes can.
And I'm the type of person, and I think we could talk about this more another time, about who I love exclamation points.
Like, And I may have even mentioned this before, but I love them.
And I find if somebody writes with exclamation points, I feel like they're very friendly.
And really, it's just somebody just pressed shift one and it says nothing about them necessarily, right?
Right, right. And, you know, sometimes people, it depends on the person, right?
Sometimes someone might think you're being a little bit abrupt, but they're also going to think that you're confident.
And really, so if that's what you're going for, and you should be, of course, then go for it.
Totally. And a part of connecting with people is understanding how they might feel.
So a more advanced tactic would be if I'm emailing you or emailing someone else that I know might take something more personally, I might change my language depending on who I'm emailing.
Right. We do that in language, spoken language all the time.
Right. But today we just want to just throw these out there.
So let us know what you guys think. You know, come on back to allearsenglish.com slash three...
And let us know if you agree or disagree.
And what about in your culture? You know, the translations of these words, do you use them in your spoken language or in your emails?
And do they make you feel seem kind of weak?
Or do you have similar words that are redundant?
They're not necessary and they make you appear less confident.
So let's hear what you guys have to say.
Come on back to our website. Michelle, any final thoughts, any final tips or tricks here?
Be strong, be confident, be beautiful. All right, let's end on that.
Thanks, Michelle, for hanging out. Okay, have a nice day, Lindsay.
See you soon. Bye. Bye. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional.
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