This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 11.
How to say no to a business invitation with style in English.
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Oh, my gosh. Yeah. So it really snowed. It snowed a lot.
It snowed like four or five inches here yesterday.
Yeah. I didn't know that. Wow. Here it's just cold and rainy.
Yeah. And we're recording this, guys, in early April.
I know this is coming out at the end of April or possibly even in May.
But anyways, we got snow in early April and nothing makes me angrier than when we get snow when it's supposed to be spring.
That's just wrong. Yeah. I know. Me too.
Oh, gosh. Okay. Well, and I keep on looking at the forecast and it's not improving anytime soon.
No. All right. We won't go off on our weather rant too much more here, but that's okay.
So, all right. At least we can stay in and just podcast all day, Michelle.
That's right. That's fun. We love podcasting.
All right. Cool. So, Michelle, what are we talking about today?
We're going to answer a question from one of our listeners about what?
Okay. Well, we are going to talk about how to say no to an invitation.
Yeah. And specifically a business invitation.
Exactly. Exactly. So guys, we're going to focus a little bit more on some of the episodes here.
Not all of them, but some of them on All Ears English on business topics because we know that you guys are working on your English for work.
You want to succeed. You want to get that promotion.
You want to make more money. And you want to support your family better.
And the way you can do that is through English at work.
So we're going to help you with that, starting off with today's episode.
Exactly. Okay. So, Michelle, let's go ahead and read the question.
The question was from Ri Huang from maybe China.
I'm not sure actually where the student is from.
But, Michelle, you want to go ahead and read the question?
Sure. Okay. Okay. Here it is. Hi, Lindsay and Michelle.
Thanks for this great podcast. It has really improved my English.
Yay, you're welcome. I wonder now, what is an appropriate way to say no to invitations?
Okay, so simple question. Good question, though.
I don't think that we have covered this nuanced question yet, Michelle.
So I'm really actually excited to dive into this.
Yeah. Yeah, because this is a really good example of a topic that's going to help our listeners.
And guys, remember, as you're listening today, if you feel like you're really getting a lot from today's episode and you're scrambling to write everything down, instead, just go over and grab the transcripts at allearsenglish.com forward slash transcripts.
Okay? Nice. So, okay, Michelle, we're going to show our listeners today how to say no, but not just how to say no, but how to say no to a business invitation.
Okay. Okay, yeah, that's important because sometimes you can feel really bad and guilty about saying no or like you're not supposed to say no, especially in the workplace.
Don't you think so? Oh, yeah. I think you have to be really careful about how you turn down.
Again, turn down an invitation is another way to say decline, right?
How you turn down business invitations because, you know, they could be great opportunities, but maybe you just don't have the time and you want those opportunities to keep coming your way.
Right. Exactly. Yeah. But if you say the wrong thing, the person will not come back to you and invite you again.
Yeah. And you don't want that to happen.
Exactly. Exactly. Michelle. Yeah. So what are some of the things that you should consider that we want to consider for our listeners when we turn down an invitation, when we say no to the invitation?
OK, well, well, the first thing is, you know, you want to acknowledge that you appreciate that they thought of you.
Yeah, totally. It's not a small thing, you know, and I think that this is applicable for anyone.
If you're working for a company or if you're self-employed, it's especially important if you're self-employed because, you know, constantly opportunities are coming your way and you can't say yes to everything.
OK. Right. Right. Right. Right. Exactly.
Yeah. And also, I mean, the second thing is that you don't have to give a reason.
Yeah. You can just say no. You know, you can just decline.
Yeah. I think we feel the social pressure to always give a reason.
I know I feel that pressure. Do you feel that, Michelle, to always give an excuse or a reason?
Yeah, I think that that's a common thing.
You know, you want to, oh, no, I can't because blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, but, you know, that's not required.
It's not necessary. So, you know, just decline.
And we're going to show you guys exactly how to do that right now.
So what's the third thing that we want to think about when we turn down an invitation?
The third thing you want to think about is to just keep the connection healthy.
What does that mean to you, Lindsay? Well, that just means to me that there's a reason this person asked you to do this thing.
Let's just give some quick examples of some invitations that might happen.
For example, in the business world, well, on this show, I invite teachers from italki to come on our show.
And that's one example of a business opportunity, a business invitation for that teacher.
And it's very important the way that that teacher – declines or accepts, right?
The words that he or she uses. That's just one example.
What would be an example of another business invitation we might get?
Um, well, let's see. I mean, it makes me even think of something as simple as like going to lunch.
Yeah, lunch. I was thinking like a lunch meeting, right?
An informal like, you know, maybe it's someone from another company that you don't immediately work with.
But maybe you want to get to know that person.
Maybe in the future, you're interested in working for that company or in that industry, right?
Yeah. Right, right. Exactly. Yeah. So there, you know, there might be certain meetings or certain extracurricular things like in the office that come up, you know, even, even something like I know offices have different, you know, clubs and, you know, maybe even like exercising or do some sort of contest or whatever.
And somebody, you know, might get involved as a group and then you feel like a little funny, right?
Exactly. Those are all good examples, like in the corporate world, right?
That, you know, there are other ways to build business relationships in corporations beyond just behind our desk.
You know, we could join, we could, you know, go take an exercise class at lunchtime with someone from work.
And if they invite us to do that, then that's kind of in some ways a business invitation because we're building a business relationship.
Right. Right. Yeah. That's really interesting.
So. All right. So when we do that, we want to keep that connection healthy.
And to me, that just means that we want to make sure that they want to they feel OK to come back and invite us again another time.
Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah.
And that is the fourth thing. You know, you want to hint that you would like to be invited another time.
Right. Don't just close it off. Exactly.
Exactly. So we're going to show you guys how to do all of these things in English right now.
So the first thing was, again, to acknowledge that you appreciate that they invited you.
What are some phrases we could use to do this, Michelle?
OK, well, you could say, wow, thank you so much for the opportunity.
Yeah, I like that. Wow. I like your intonation.
Can you do that again? Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Good.
Thank you so much is a very polite way to say thank you.
Right. A very thorough thank you. And then also, I really appreciate the opportunity is another thing we could say.
Right. Be careful of saying this for more like casual like lunch things.
Yeah. Yeah. You might want to keep it to like thank you so much or I really appreciate like you're asking me or something like that.
But like for something for something like more simple like lunch or some sort of a club like.
You know, you might sound a little funny if you say if you talk about it as an opportunity.
I don't know. That's true. That's a good point.
We have to be careful with the word opportunity.
You know, as I just mentioned, sometimes I invite teachers to come on the show for my talkie as guests.
And that's definitely an opportunity because that's a huge, huge opportunity.
But if it's just a lunch invite, then it's not exactly an opportunity.
Right, right. So for the more casual things, you can, you know, say like, I really appreciate it.
Oh, like that's. That sounds, you know, I don't know.
Exactly, exactly. So the key here is listening to what native speakers say, you know, when they decline invitations to see what these levels of formality are, right?
Exactly. And what's another thing we could say to acknowledge that we appreciate?
Uh-huh. Well, do we do the second one or – yeah.
Yeah, we did the second one. So, okay. The third one is I'm honored that you thought of me for this.
Yeah. That reminds me of like when someone invites you to join a project or something.
Right, right, right. Also not good for the lunch.
Also not really that great for a lunch opportunity.
But these are really, really important for these, you know, special opportunities at work, right?
Where you like, you know, a special project, like Lindsay said, or a special meeting.
Maybe somebody is asking you to lead a meeting or something.
Yes, totally. And the last one, Michelle, is very formal.
Like I think I would use this in like super formal situations.
What is it? Unfortunately, I have to decline.
Yeah. Yeah. So that might be for something really formal, like you're working for the queen or something.
Right, right, right. No, I'm just joking.
It's not only reserved for that, but yeah, this would be for a more formal situation.
Right, exactly. And a couple of other ways to decline.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to participate this time.
Right? Ah, that's good. I like the this time edition.
Why do you like that? What does that do?
It leaves the door open for next time. Yeah, it leaves the door open for next time.
And that's what we want to do. Exactly. And it softens it, you know.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to participate sounds like very final.
But when you say this time, it's like, well, I don't know.
I don't know what's going to happen next time.
Exactly. When we drop these things like next time, this time, that implies that you want there to be other times in the future.
You know, that is a way of building a connection.
I mean, even like in the dating world, like I've used that before when I say, oh, maybe next time we can do that.
You're implying that you want to see the person again.
Yeah, it's amazing how these little words can really tip a connection.
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Exclusions apply. See details online. Okay, what's another thing we could say?
One other. You could say, I wish I could join you, but I can't.
Okay, good. I really like that one. Yeah, that one would work great for the lunch invite.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Exactly. This one is perfect for that.
Okay. And there are a couple of other ways to keep the connection healthy.
That's one other thing we said we want to make sure we do that we think about when we decline an invitation.
How do we keep the connection healthy, Michelle?
What do we say? Okay. Well, one thing you could say is, I hope you'll let me know if something like this comes up again.
Okay. I like that. I like that. Or I hope to be able to accept the invitation another time.
That's a little wordy. It's a little wordy.
It takes a long time to say that. So that may be better written in an email.
Yeah. Yeah. I could see that. Yeah. Okay.
What are two other things that you would say?
Maybe, for example, if you're writing an email and you're declining to end that response?
To keep the connection healthy. Right. Well, you could say, let's stay in touch or keep in touch.
Those are both good. So those are good ways to just keep that bridge open and make sure you're still connected to the person because you don't want them to think that you're never going to accept that invitation.
Yeah. Right, right. Exactly. Yeah. These are all really useful, Lindsay.
Oh, well, good. I hope our listeners are going to go out and use these and not be afraid to experiment a little.
Guys, that is the way that you improve your English is that you go out and you try at least one of these phrases.
We're giving you a bunch of them today. All you need to do is try one of them. and bring that into your vocabulary permanently, okay?
So let's show them how it's done, Michelle.
Let's go ahead and do a little role play conversation.
Are you ready? I'm ready. Okay, so here we go.
So, hi, Michelle, can I speak with you for just a minute?
Sure, Lindsay, what's up? Well, Michelle, next week, I'm going to a conference to meet with 100 other podcasters and media producers around the country.
It'll be heavily focused on voice work, the kind of thing that's right up your alley.
Oh, wow. That sounds amazing. Yeah. Would you like to join me at the conference?
I can get you tickets at a 50% discount, and I would be happy to introduce you to some big names in radio.
Oh, wow. That would be really great for building my network.
Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Oh, I'm honored that you thought of me for this.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to go. Oh, okay.
That's too bad. Yeah, but I hope you'll let me know if something like this comes up again.
Of course I will, Michelle. Oh, that does sound awesome.
I don't think I would turn that down. I know, I know.
I wonder why I can't go. It's unrealistic.
It's unrealistic. But here you use some of the key phrases that we talked about, Michelle, right?
You said, oh, I'm honored that you thought of me for this.
I think that's very nice. That really is recognizing that you feel, yeah, you appreciate the offer.
Yeah, right, right. Exactly. And then I said, unfortunately, I won't be able to go.
And it's interesting. I didn't tell you why.
Yeah, you didn't. Exactly. You didn't tell me why.
You just said that you can't go. Yeah. So that's fine.
I mean, you don't need to get into that slippery slope of saying, oh, I have something that weekend.
And then maybe the person solves your problem.
And then maybe, you know, don't go into the details.
It's not important. Yeah. And also, you know, I could add if I wanted to, I could add, unfortunately, I won't be able to go this time.
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. That's another possible thing that I could have said, right?
Talking about using this time, next time, things like that.
That's what we said before. And I like that.
That would have been even better if you had said that because, you know, then I would be thinking, okay, next time we get this conference opportunity to meet other podcasters, we'll definitely bring Michelle, right?
We'll invite her again. And then finally I said, I hope you'll let me know if something like this comes up again, right?
Another, you know, a signal, a very direct signal, you know, that I really want to go, but I can't.
Yeah. No, totally. Totally. Absolutely. That's it.
So this is good, Michelle. I mean, I think this is a huge skill, especially if we're in that place where we're moving to the advanced level in English and we want to build those business relationships just to have a better career.
I mean, the worst feeling in the world is walking into work and knowing that you can't communicate with your colleagues.
Right, Michelle? Mm-hmm. Yeah, completely.
Yeah, that's really hard. So, yeah, guys, here are some really good tips on, you know, how to, you know, unfortunately, when you have to turn down an invitation, how to do it with style.
With style. With pizzazz and style. I like that.
I like that. And this is very much in line with other topics that we covered in the Charismatic Connector, right, our course.
Yes. And Michelle and I built this course this winter for you guys and for this exact purpose, to build better business relationships and to be charismatic at work.
So, guys, if you want to get our free Charisma Masterclass to get started with a few of those strategies and skills, go to allearsenglish.com forward slash charisma.
And also remember, you can go over and get your native tutor at italki if you go to allearsenglish.com forward slash I-T-A-L-K-I.
This is a really good way, a good topic to work on with a native tutor, okay?
Because you can't just listen to these and then go out and use them.
You do need to practice them. Yes, yes, yes, for sure.
Okay, cool. Well, Michelle, this has been fun.
Yes, yes, yes. I will talk to you soon. Okay, take care, Michelle.
Bye. Bye, Lindsay. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional.
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