You're tuned in to Roundtable.
I'm Steve Hatherly.
Today with Fei Fei and Xinyu.
Coming up.
Forget Awkward Dinner Dates.
China singles are now finding love through laughter at stand-up comedy matchmaking shows.
Fun!
From improv icebreakers to instant audience feedback, dating has become a live game.
But is this booming trend about real connection or perhaps people are just out for a laugh?
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And now.
Traditional matchmaking is getting a comedic glow-up.
Across China, young singles are ditching awkward dinner dates and stepping into the spotlight, so to speak, at stand-up comedy matchmaking shows.
Here, dating becomes a kind of game.
Improv punchlines double as icebreakers, and lighting the lamp means instant attraction.
The crowds are bigger than ever.
They are really popular.
And organizers can barely keep up with the booming number of people wanting a ticket.
But critics and there are always critics.
They're asking are these low-cost social events really about finding love, or people just chasing a good laugh on a fun night out?
I say, before we even start this story, I say... who cares?
Yeah, exactly.
My point.
Critics always ruin everything.
Yeah.
I mean, this is, you can't lose really.
You can't lose.
If you go out looking for love at a comedy show and you end up just laughing at the comedian.
Well, that's a win too.
All right.
Well, let's find out exactly what this is all about.
It is, um, a really fun trend that's happening.
Yes.
Actually.
Um, the other day I just listened to a podcast.
It's, It's a stand-up comedians.
They are sharing or chatting during a live show, but they turn it to a podcast.
But recently they have just organized a matchmaking session for these single guys and girls.
Onto the stage.
And these stand-up comedians, they are working as hosts.
On that particular episode, there were three guys, young guys and three young females.
They don't know each other.
And then the hosts will like ask random questions about their personality, what their hobbies or interests are or preferences are of finding the partner.
So that kind of whole scenario makes the this matchmaking more like humorous or relaxed and interactive, rather than this.
You know the Traditional awkward matchmaking side when you have to speak to another stranger.
Imagine that.
Imagine having to speak to another human.
Or sometimes it's dozens of human beings and they're taking turns to talk to you.
That kind of matchmaking.
I would think that this would be... I mean, it depends on your personality, right?
For some people, going out on a blind date one-on-one can be a really anxiety-inducing experience.
But for others?
Standing up in front of a crowd being on a stage while a host tries to matchmake you with a random stranger.
I mean, I can see how it takes the pressure off, but for other people I could see how this puts the pressure on perhaps a little more.
But comparing to the traditional matchmaking event, I think I was watching a really old movie back in the 2000s.
It's also about, you know, dating and getting married.
And there is a scene about this traditional matchmaking event that launched by a lot of these matchmaking agencies.
And the thing they do is that they sort of have a hall in, for example, a hotel or in a restaurant.
And, of course people, males and females, enter the hall and they start to have take-arounds and talking to each other.
Like speed dating.
Yeah, they only have like one minute.
Yeah, right.
But they cannot see each other?
They can see each other, but it's like we have 10 guys and 10 females.
It's like two rows of people.
And you sort of rotate.
Yes.
So you can meet as many at the opposite side of your partner, potential candidates as possible.
And you can be very direct when it comes to what's your income?
Where are you from?
What's your family member?
What are your family members?
Where do you live?
Do you have a house?
Do you have a car?
Sounds like a policeman.
I feel like you are speed dating me right now.
I don't want to answer any of this.
Taking a list and checking every point.
All right, so how does this work then?
So you go to a comedy club.
Oh and, by the way, we should say that you don't have to get a seat or a ticket for the matchmaking part of the show, right?
You can just go, and it's known to the comedian, I guess by where you're sitting, that you're not going to be involved in that part of it.
But if you are involved, well, how does that work?
In some cases, there will be these comedians or they work as the hosts.
They step off the stage and move through the crowd.
And they will randomly invite the audience up one by one.
And they will ask questions like their job, their age, and what they're looking for in a partner.
And some of them, they have these designated matchmaking seats that I mentioned before.
There are just three candidates for each side.
And then these are like people who have applied before and they have selected some of these candidates people to be on the show.
And they also have this lighting the lamp section when, if you have this particular interest on a particular audience, then the house will, the lights will turn up and it will allow a two-way selection under full visibility.
So people will know that.
Under full visibility.
Wait, so what?
So if you see a dude and you're like, oh, he's hot.
You light his lamp or do you know how that works exactly?
Or do you have a lamp at your table and you light up your own lamp and then they ask you who you're interested in.
I guess there's a button for every candidate.
And if you think you are interested in a person, then you can hit the button.
And then there will be a light inside the room will light up.
And then you will know, okay, someone's heart is beating a little faster.
That's for everyone to see.
And then I guess the comedian's job is to...
Take the information that is.
I mean, this is quite, quite the skill, I think, from the host's point of view, because they need to take the information that's provided to them by the match.
Make ease, if that's a word.
And then.
Like spin that into comedy, spin it into jokes and keep the mood light.
And it's kind of improv at that point.
But I think well, when it comes to comedians, it would be one of the skills I would say you require to be able to be able to teasing your audience.
And I think that's also one activity is being expect in a lot of these stand-up comedies not only matchmaking, but in certain areas of the, for example in the front row seats, you are expected to be interacted with the comedian themselves.
You are expected to get teased often.
They have some interactive games.
Some formats include drawing red strings or grouping participants for games on an outdoor lawn.
To facilitate some organic interaction that does not sound organic at all.
Then they've got some post show follow up activities too.
So a lot of shows.
They are collaborations between the comedy clubs and then professional dating platforms.
So these aren't strictly put on by the comedy clubs themselves.
So if a match doesn't happen on stage, then the platforms can also provide some one-on-one matching services afterward, if you're interested to keep the connection going.
And this has become really, really popular.
Yeah, especially among the post-95 or post-90s. well, generations born after 1995 and even 2000s.
There were organizers who even struggled to fill the seats for traditional matchmaking events and now seeing headache.
They're seeing a new kind of headache for having too many applicants.
I think one organizer.
They reported They have nearly 300 applicants but they only have 120 spots available in a single week.
Young people, they are eager to find a partner.
Is this surprising to you that this is so popular?
My question is based on my limited time and experience in China, but from what I understand about Chinese culture and from what I observe in a chinese workplace, people are pretty reserved.
People are kind of shy shy yeah, a little, especially when it comes to romance, a little on the introverted side, okay.
So my observations are fair.
You, you think um, so therefore, are you surprised?
You know, 120 seats but 300 applicants.
It sounds like a job advertisement over competitive right yeah, but i don't.
I'm not really surprised.
Remember we had a really recently, a listener called jenny asking for you know how can i find?
Oh my gosh jenny, are you listening today?
Jenny, go to a stand-up comedy matchmaking show.
Why not, is that?
I think there are a lot of young people out there who are want to get involved in a relationship.
They just don't know how to start.
And when it comes to, you know, traditional matchmaking or setting up a blind date, especially by your parents' generation, that's awkward because Nobody likes that.
Yeah, nobody likes that.
Is that true?
Nobody likes that?
I mean, we still see stories today about applications where the parents are in charge of setting up their kids and then the kids don't know about it.
Like they're doing this behind their back.
Yeah.
Because they don't like it.
That's like a thing now.
And then the parents can take classes through the applications, like how to convince your kid to get married.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
Or something like that, like how to approach the topic of marriage with your child.
And these are paid classes, by the way.
I saw this in the news last week.
So I guess that's part of the reason for the popularity then, because if young Chinese people are facing that kind of pressure,
Or maybe it's not the pressure.
Maybe it's just, if I don't get out there and find somebody myself, my mom is going to be on an app.
By Thursday afternoon, trying to fix me up with her neighbor's cousin or something like that.
There could be one mentality behind that.
But I feel like that's more like the mentality for those people who are in their 30s.
Yeah, over 35.
Not that in their 20s.
I mean these younger generations.
They are going to these stand up comedy shows because first They like watching stand-up comedy shows.
I have a question about that.
The side question, sorry.
Is that a growing new thing in China or has stand-up comedy been around for a long time?
Stand-up comedy is also relatively new in recent years.
Especially because of the popularity on this TV show that features stand-up comedy competitions.
Now it makes a little bit more sense, because stand-up comedy is like a new and growing thing on its own, and then you throw in the matchmaking aspect of things.
I think going to this stand-up comedy can also be kind of a screening process, because when you sign up for these activities, you know people are signed up also for the same event, probably carry the same level of humor, same sense, similar sense of humor with you.
At least they both like yeah, and they don't also open to new things.
Oh no, i'm the critic now.
I was just criticizing.
I know, i was just criticizing critics a minute ago.
Um Yeah yeah, yeah.
You're right.
You're right.
I mean, there's at least a shared interest there that you want to be there.
Yeah, so you don't have to be worrying about getting to know someone really boring on your standard or finding that your hobbies just completely mismatched with one another.
There's just no possibility to get further connected.
But from a critic's point of view, I would feel like... Don't let me influence you.
You have.
I feel like, are these young people they're going there for show or are they really looking for their true love in these stand-up comedy shows?
Is this performative?
Yeah, performative.
Because you have to matchmake in front of the audience.
Then the personality that you presented can be the personality you want people to see.
I mean, on a deeper level, you want to connect with someone.
It should be more private setting.
You know, you can open your heart.
That's a good point.
Yeah, right.
So if you're on a stage and a comedian asks you a question, or one of the other participants asks a question, you might feel some sort of pressure to provide um, an impressive answer or or an entertaining answer.
Because you're in front of a crowd, you might feel pressure to try to be funny yourself.
Then you've got the anxiety of, like i said, if you're not used to being on a stage in front of people, you might not be capable of giving a genuine answer at that particular moment.
Yeah, but I don't think that really matters.
Even though we're coming to, for example, one on one dates with a new stranger, you will be still putting on your performative self.
You are not giving out your true self on the first date anyway.
That's also true.
Yeah.
You're not going to tell your first date, you know, I really like reading.
But, you know, in reality, you like scrolling TikTok videos for hours.
I think we already learned your first date was how much money do you make?
Where do you live?
What kind of educational background do your parents have?
Tell me everything about your family right now.
Yeah.
So it's like.
It's a process.
You get to know people through multiple days in the future anyway.
This is not just in China, by the way.
I did a little digging in Australia.
They have Sunday Singles.
It's called, and it's a comedy show and singles event combined where laughter breaks the ice.
This is from their website, where laughter breaks the ice and comedians turn people's dating disasters into comedy gold.
It's dating done differently.
Vancouver, they have Comedy Speed Dating, what you were talking about before, Feifei.
This is a combination of standup comedy and matchmaking.
And apparently it's become quite the hit amongst, uh, the young generation.
And um, you know there are concerns about depth.
You know the how, how shallow this type of event, these types of events might be.
Privacy concerns perhaps, because you are handing over personal information about yourself.
Uh, Long term effectiveness.
People are questioning this in Vancouver and Australia, too.
But whether you care or not, I mean, I guess it depends on what you're actually looking for.
If you are convinced that you are going to go and find your future, you know, your forever love.
Maybe that's putting too much pressure, right?
On a comedy show.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Just enjoy dating.
Any other potential concerns with these types of things, these types of gatherings?
I think we have talked pretty much.
Like Steve, you just said the like privacy risks and also data labeling as well.
But I feel like the comedy, like stand-up comedy companies or these groups, they are working together, collaborating with these matchmaking professional platforms.
Trap, maybe.
Sometimes they might like prioritize like profits first, then like um, just really helping these young people to find their love, so that kind of.
There's also an issue of balance there.
Well, i say, just enjoy dating, who cares?
Stop saying that, although i do agree.
Yeah, but you're paying for this, right?
I mean you're paying yeah, you're taking, you're paying to go, you pay to go to a comedy show.
So yeah, we shouldn't be surprised that you're you're paying for this as well.
But yeah, i see that as a legit concern.
You're just being filtered.
You're being filtered into paying for more things perhaps I don't know the details on a different platform, or on a platform that maybe you didn't even know existed before you decided to sign up for this.
Would you do it?
Would you be interested if this were applicable to your situations right now?
Well, my dating days are... In a vacuum.
In a vacuum.
But my only concern even though I said you know, just enjoy dating, just don't care about this concerns this criticism.
But my only concern is that, for a lot of introverts out there, if these comedy clubs are also opening, selling tickets to other regular spectators, and you were invited on stage with other people, another bunch of people
That's true because that's what they do, right?
Not everybody there is a participant.
Yeah, that would be kind of really, you know, stressful activity for my, you know, personal experiences.
But I think for even just going to e-comedy nights just for a laugh and perhaps also getting to know somebody new, even though you find that you know it's not really a potential dating partner, you can still make friends at this event.
Just open, just be open.
Yeah, that's my advice, i.
I think for me it really depends on how old you are.
Maybe, if i, like 10 years ago, i would definitely go to these stand-up comedy shows and to maybe personally participate in these matchmaking events, but after like 10 years, over 30, then I am really looking for a more serious relationship.
Oh, that's a bit dismissive though.
That's like saying people who go to these things aren't looking for something more, like they are looking for fun instead of like being serious to find the other angry emails to see you at qqcom.
But i'm just saying from my perspective yeah no, i get it.
Yeah not, maybe not stand-up comedy, and for me i would far rather host the comedy dating night than actually be involved.
You enjoy teasing around with the applicants.
It's kind of what I do for a living.
Anyway, without the matchmaking, right?
Anyway, fun story.
Jenny Jenny, if you're out there listening today, get out there and go to one of these things and tell us how fun it is.
All right, that's it for today's roundtable.
I'm Steve for Feifei and Xinyu.
We all thank you kindly for being with us today, and we ask you to come join us again next time.
