Hi, welcome back to Eat Your Crest podcast.
I'm Jisoo and I'm Crystal, so our topic today is, i think, quite a funny one.
We wanted to talk really about having a type, and i think colloquially.
When you hear this phrase of having a type, you often think about romantic relationships.
But i do think that in more casual relationships, like friendships or even in work relationships, for example, You can kind of see a pattern in what your quote unquote type could be.
Okay.
Do you feel like I have a type?
And then I'll answer if I think you have a type.
Okay.
So I would definitely say that you have a type.
Okay.
I feel like you always say this and then I try to deny it.
Because sometimes things line up in a way that I didn't mean for.
Okay, honestly, I can understand that there's no intentionality behind it.
However, I feel like the laws of attraction show what you find attractive.
I see.
There are some common themes.
All right.
What is one of the common themes?
So I have three factors that I think are like your type.
Okay.
One is height.
I'll accept that.
The dude has to be like over 6'1".
At least.
Height is actually a very big factor for me.
Number two, well-educated.
Okay.
Very well-educated.
Actually, I think that is kind of fair.
I think if you said it in a different way, maybe it wouldn't be.
But I actually do really care about if I think the person is smart because...
I feel like I ask a lot of questions and to be able to like uphold a conversation from that is important to me.
Sometimes I ask stupid questions.
For example, the other day I literally was like do you think it's possible to create a warm front in the bathroom by showering hella hot on like a hella cold day?
And then you got a serious answer back.
Yeah, like I'm trying to solve this question.
So yeah, I'll accept the way that you've described it.
Okay, okay.
The last one is you like an older brother.
Okay, that one, I didn't realize it.
But when I reflected back, I was like, oh, I guess everyone has been an older brother in some way.
Which I think is kind of interesting that you say that, because the other two you're probably more aware of it.
You know, maybe they're like active things that you choose and like want for in a partner.
But there are things that I feel like people are attracted to, that you don't realize until afterwards.
You only notice the pattern, but you're not actively seeking it out.
Right.
A type can be multidimensional.
Okay.
Yeah.
Maybe older brother is a substitute for my ideal, which is the guy should be a little older than me.
This is also hard when I'm only really thinking about like two people.
I think that's the same for you.
Should I send you some pictures right now of ex-boyfriends?
I just have all of their tabs open on LinkedIn.
Yeah.
But I'm thinking about what you have presented for me.
And I'm thinking about that across more than two people.
And it's like mostly true.
Okay, so it seems like you accept my description of your type.
But is there any factor that you have in your mind that I might have missed?
I guess a lot of this has to do with personal preference, what I look for in people who I would want to date.
I think some qualities have maybe changed as I've gotten older.
Or maybe it's also that some of the things that I like in a more physical sense, I guess i know are not very realistic, so then i don't necessarily follow that to a t.
Do you remember back in the day i was like yeah, i really like guys with skinny legs yeah, but i'm like i know that's not always going to be the case.
That's something that i'm willing to give up, i guess.
And then I guess one of the other more unrealistic things I like curly hair on guys, which is interesting because also in the past few years, curly perms have been a popular thing.
But that I've always considered as something I probably just have to give up, because most Asians don't have naturally curly hair.
Yeah, yeah.
So I guess those are things that you're attracted to, but not necessarily a pattern in your relationships.
Yeah.
Oh my god, wait, I thought of a hella funny one.
And I think you'll see it when I say it, but it sounds so wrong to say it.
I think I really like it when the guy is like I don't know how else to say this, but obsessed with me.
Oh my god, that is totally a pattern for sure.
Oh god, I literally don't know how else to say it.
I guess it's like some golden retriever energy.
Maybe that's the right way to say it.
Yeah, like your number one fan.
Oh, that's a cute one.
Is it?
It makes me sound so vain.
But I feel like that's kind of something you can train in a guy.
Whoa.
It's not necessarily like Half the people in this world are born obsessed with you and half aren't.
You know what I mean?
Okay, fair, fair.
But then how do you train it out of someone?
No, I think you can though.
I think to an extent it's like a game.
Like dropping breadcrumbs for them during the chasing stage.
Exactly.
But maybe you're right.
Maybe that quality of being obsessed with you is something that some guys are more susceptible to.
You know what I mean?
Some guys are primed for it.
I mean, I did hear this theory that the person that you date and how they treat you and how much they love you is a reflection of how much you love yourself.
So I'm like, oh, okay, I guess I'm just, I have a good relationship with myself.
You're also your own number one fan.
I'm like, if you don't treat me better than how I treat myself, tough competition.
Dude, honestly, I like that a lot.
It's like a good thing to strive for.
Yeah.
And of course, as long as it's a healthy balance, I jest, you know, about being obsessed.
I think it's more about that golden retriever energy.
Yeah, for sure.
I guess it's like making sure that both people are like invested.
If someone was like half-assed dating, it probably feels bad if it feels half-assed.
I think it also matters how it's expressed too.
Even if how they feel towards about you is very strong, if how they channel it into your relationship isn't fully what you want out of a relationship, it's also just like well, the energy is only half the battle.
True, true.
Okay, I'm a little scared, but let's flip it.
So how would you describe my type?
Okay, this was hard for me because your relationship has been going on for so long.
So, you know, that kind of overwhelms everything.
But we did recently have a conversation that prompted me to think maybe I have a couple of things.
Okay.
One the person has to be well-liked in in general, so they probably have good, positive energy and people around them are usually fans of them, i guess, yeah.
Two this might sound silly, but maybe they're like a stereotypical guy in in the sense of some interests okay, sports and like games and things like that.
Yeah, Maybe a better way to put it is they have active social lives, so they do active slash social things.
That's a good way to put it.
I feel like I want the guy to be able to talk about something when another guy asks him about it.
Yeah, you want them to also be able to hold their own.
Right.
Let me think of a third one, if there even is a third one.
I guess they're Asian.
That's an easy one.
Yeah, it's my cop out.
I think your first two ones, well, I guess the third one too, but it's pretty accurate.
The first one, especially the way you put it, I think is very accurate.
Wait, I already forgot what I said for the first one.
You said someone who's well-liked.
Oh right, right.
Yes, i feel like i'm very drawn to that kind of energy.
I think certain people tend to be like social pillars when you go out with a big group yeah, not in like a commanding energy type of thing, but more just like your go-to people you know that are generally looked favorably upon.
I'm a big fan of that kind of person Also.
What's funny though, is that Ashley James I feel like he did fit that, but now he fits it even more
Like, he got more confident after you guys dated.
Interesting.
Well, actually, that brings up an interesting point.
Do you think that having a type is not only the precursor to picking the people you date, but also what happens after?
Like, do we mold people a little bit into our types?
Do you think you date for potential?
It's like hiring for a job.
There's probably some of that.
But they have to have the beginnings of it.
So I guess it is they have to have the potential for it.
Yeah.
So if they grow into it, then that's a success, I guess.
Or that's like a good thing.
But I mean, if they don't, it's fine, because they already had traits that were still very good for you.
I guess that goes back to the whole like you wanting the guy to be like obsessed with you.
I think you can sort of train that out of someone and you can shape your relationship to be in that archetype you know.
Interesting.
Have I been unknowingly just shaping things that way?
You're like, welcome to your new role in this relationship.
This is your position.
All right.
The more we say obsessed, the more I'm like, oh God, I'm going to reword this into they have to have a lot of enthusiasm towards dating me.
OK, rebrand.
I think another thing that relates to what you've just said is how you yourself are like in a relationship.
And maybe that also shapes things and also determines what's compatible with you.
Yeah.
So like maybe some wants are just your subconscious being like.
I know this would work well with how you function.
That's true.
I feel like how I like to be in a relationship is I want to be a very strong partner to someone, both internally in our home lives, but also in social situations.
I like to feel like I'm a half to another half.
And I feel like that's where the liking social pillars comes in.
Because if someone is very well liked, it's like easy to be a strong support to that person.
And also fun.
You can do banter, like have memes between each other.
Maybe that's where that comes in to play.
Yeah, I can totally see that.
And you yourself are also pretty social and you have a lot of good and close friends.
So I feel like your partner would have to be able to keep up.
Oh, yeah.
You know, meeting new people, figuring out a way to fit in all of that kind of stuff.
I feel like I would be really sad if I introduced my SO to like a group of friends and then my group of friends didn't have overwhelmingly positive things to say.
I could see that devastating you.
It would crush me.
But I feel like that's totally fair, because in the friend groups that we share, and also in your other friend groups, there's a lot of time spent with them.
So if your partner can't figure it out, I guess that's like a lot of shared time that is lost.
Essentially, for sure, I guess it comes down to what I value right, like I value these big friend groups, this social network that I have and I need my partner to enmesh well into those, and I feel like in big groups and stuff it's easy to get separated.
So then your partner also needs to be able to like hold their own and not have to like lean on you, I guess, Right.
It's all clicking.
It's all making sense.
Actually, the second thing you said too, which was, I guess the guy has to be aware of, like the stereotypical guy conversation topics and maybe just fit into that role if he needs to.
I think that's pretty fair because I try to fit into like the stereotypical girl role to an extent.
Or I like just being able to like keep up with that world as well.
And it's not meant to be like restrictive, right?
It's not like, oh, I want my SO to only be into sports and not be into anything girly.
Like it's nothing like that.
It's more like the base level needs to be there just for conversation purposes.
So I think that's an interesting one too.
Love when a guy talks about sports.
I could be like, oh yeah, go sports.
I wonder if I should amend this, or maybe it's just that your partner has gone above and beyond this, because I feel like, in addition to just the baseline typical guy stuff, he's actually very randomly knowledgeable or into a wide variety of things.
So he's able to keep up conversation in a lot of different situations.
Some are like maybe a little more unexpected than others.
Love a man with a fun fact.
Okay, also what i was surprised by how wide his knowledge of sports spanned.
There's like the typical sports, right like basketball and football, but then james and some of our other guy friends also just know a bunch of random shit about other like slightly more niche sports and i'm like what the heck?
When do you guys have time to learn about all this?
It's so crazy.
Like one day, I remember we were talking about like ping pong or something.
And then James was like, oh, yeah, that guy used to be number one in the world at ping pong.
And then now this guy took over.
And I was just like, what?
Of all the sports?
Like, I'm confused.
Like, why are you following this?
You don't even play.
Yeah.
This is also a quality that I wish to learn from.
I would love to have this breadth of knowledge as well.
It's always nice to, I think, see factors in your SO that you don't have that you want to strive towards.
Ooh, okay.
So then, are there any other things you think maybe you look for in a partner, because you yourself also want to strive towards that?
Ooh, okay.
Yes.
So I would say a big one is athleticism.
Oh, okay.
Which is so funny because I'm like very unathletic, as in even the things that I do to like.
Keep active, right.
It's like going to the gym or like golf, Pilates.
These are things that don't require a high level of athleticism, if that makes sense.
I'm not playing like team ball sports, you know?
So I think I, like someone who is into team sports or like can be very athletic, just has that sort of naturally baked into their body.
Yeah.
It's okay, Jisoo.
I think you have a baseline level of athleticism.
Wait, really?
Wow, thanks.
I think that's like a big one.
Athleticism.
Maybe that even combines to our like DNA and our history.
True.
Like you want someone who feels like sturdy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Someone who will bring back the like deer carcass while I'm out there foraging for berries.
I can totally understand that.
Maybe that's why i like tall people, because they seem sturdier.
Well actually, the real reason is because i'm a little tall, so i hope that they'd be at least at least like five inches taller than me.
Yeah, you want like a proportional partner?
Yeah dude, but do you think there's any like maybe more physical attributes, kind of like how i have that height thing?
Yeah, I like people with broad shoulders.
I knew it.
I remembered it as I asked you the question.
I was like, oh wait, she likes broad shoulders.
I think it's like the feature that I find the most manly.
You know, like a tall guy with broad shoulders.
I think mine are way less niche than your like skinny legs and curly hair.
Oh, maybe good eyebrows.
Oh, okay.
That's a good one.
Because I have like no brow hair.
Oh my god, do you think of like genetics when you date people?
Oh my god, i'd like to say i don't consciously, except for maybe seeking out a partner who is tall.
That probably is blatantly a genetic thing.
But when it comes down to it, the brow preference probably a genetic thing, right.
Broad shoulders maybe even could be.
I feel like my parents have narrow shoulders.
I also kind of look at skin.
If they have good skin, that's like a bonus.
Am I crazy?
I feel like most guys have decent skin.
Yeah, I guess you're right.
There's always that meme about how guys just wash their face with nothing and you're like wait, why is your skin hella good?
Guys doing nothing and having perfect skin and long eyelashes.
Dude, fuck, you're kind of right.
I do have like a lot of niche likes, huh?
Because I just thought of another one that I have.
Yeah, i like when a guy has good looking hands, i'm like kind of particular about what hands look like.
You know, that's kind of funny because you're not the first person to say that and i have to say i've like never looked at or cared about a guy's hands.
Okay well, i'm glad i'm not the only one.
Well like, what do you think it is?
Is it because having nice hands implies something?
Maybe like musical skill or like them being good with their hands?
Dude, I have no idea.
I just know I have a preference.
It's fair.
I guess the closest thing I could think of that I have, I like seeing veins on like buff arms.
Okay.
Okay.
That could be somewhat niche.
Yeah, yeah.
I think that's a very fair one too.
Yeah.
It's kind of related to like their physicality.
Right, right.
I don't really love fat hands or like thick hands.
Oh, interesting.
Yeah.
Very interesting.
I like...
Hands that are like a little more long and, I don't know, elegant, I guess.
Hands that look like they've never touched a drop of water in their life.
Dude, do you think subconsciously you like long, slender hands because you like long, slender men?
Oh my god.
Whoa.
Actually, though, I'm connecting the dots here.
Maybe there's a connection there.
Maybe there is.
They can't be like too feminine, I guess.
They have to be well balanced.
I'll send you some pictures later.
It's just Jimin's hands.
All right.
Well, besides romantic relationships, now that we've kind of established some pieces of our types, do you think there's other categories of ships that you have types for?
Do you think you have like a friendship type for people at work even, or just like day to day friendships?
I was kind of thinking about this.
So I feel like it's actually way easier for me to categorize a work friendship type than it is to categorize a close friend type.
Because the factors that I can think of for like patterns amongst my close friends are are just like a definition of a good friend.
I'm like okay, the pattern between my close friends are dependable loyal, fun to talk to, like fun to hang out with.
I'm like those are qualities that anyone seeks out in a friend right, right.
But for work friends i do feel like i seek out specific people.
Okay, i have a feeling i know where this is going, But go ahead.
And then I'll tell you my thoughts before and after.
I think one archetype of work friend that I really like, the funny older sister archetype.
Maybe an older woman who loves to crack jokes and like poke fun, very teasing and, just like in general, very fun and easy to talk to.
And the second one is like a dependable friend, someone who you can talk about niche work things with, where I know I can trust this person.
I know it's not going to get out like someone to goss with a daily driver type of work bestie.
Yeah.
The third one is like a easygoing work hangout buddy.
We don't have to always get into the deep stuff, but we can like go out for a cup of matcha or like go on a walk together or grab lunch together, one on one, and it's like chill and not awkward and we can just talk about anything.
Okay.
Those are like the three work friendships that I seek out.
Okay, i guess it didn't go too much in the direction i thought it was.
I was thinking like maybe they would share some similarities of things that you like in a partner.
Oh interesting, the first one is kind of the older sister person who can crack jokes and have a social presence.
There was like a little bit of connection there.
But then the other two are like a little more generic.
You're like you seek out people with broad shoulders, love sports okay.
But maybe to help narrow it down, think of all your work friends and i'll ask you a few things of like is there a maybe some traits that they all share?
Are they talkative or less talkative?
Talkative, most of them Yeah, I would say most of them are talkative.
Okay.
Are they well-established in the work social place or are they more outcast?
I think they're usually well-established.
Are they older than you usually or like same age or younger?
I think usually they're same age or older.
Okay.
Okay.
Whoa.
Oh my God.
I do have a time.
What the fuck?
So you like to go for older, social, like slightly more extroverted people.
Yeah.
Wait, this is crazy.
I feel like I'm getting shown my inner thoughts, you know?
And I think you bring up a good point.
As different as it seems on the surface, it is actually kind of similar qualities that I do seek out in a relationship.
Wow.
Mind blown.
What about like regular friendships?
Do you think those three things are also similar?
It's like on the talkative scale they're more towards the middle slash, higher end of talkative and then pretty social, I guess.
Or have have a lot of connections around your age, maybe a little older.
I mean, I think it is true that generally my close friends are same age or maybe slightly older.
Whoa.
Wait, this is like mind blowing.
Maybe it is also applicable to my close friends.
I feel like all of my close friends could hold a strong conversation generally are praised wherever they go for like being awesome people.
I mean they all get along with each other as well just super likable kind, dependable humans.
But okay, counter argument this is just like generally like cool people you know what i mean no, but like you can have friends who are really quiet, you know.
But i think most of your friends, when they need to be, that they're very engaged.
That's true.
They're all very socially adept, I think.
Whoa, this is crazy.
I feel like we're going too in-depth into my soul.
So let's flip this onto you.
And I would like you to describe patterns that you see or friendships that you have in the workplace, or just in general.
Okay.
I'm thinking work right now.
It's maybe a little hard to describe work fully because it's still a work in progress, but I've definitely gotten a lot closer to to some of my work friends than I have been, you know, in even just like a year or two ago.
So I'm thinking of like what clicks.
I think they have to be chill.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
I think I know how to describe this.
I understand rule following, especially at work.
But I think they also have to have a level of chill where it's like okay to bend the rules a little bit, or like try to problem solve around the rules.
So I think that is a factor.
Because I think, you know, generally in life, I'm also somewhat chill.
So if someone is like constantly bothered by everything, I think maybe that like dampens my mood or I can't relate because I'm like oh well, I don't really care about that.
Okay, so it can't be too uptight.
Yeah, i think there's two aspects here.
One they have to have a level of outgoingness or or ability to like hold a conversation, slash lead.
One, because at work i'm like introverted crystal okay.
Okay, i'm like don't talk to me, i'm gonna go have lunch by myself, you know like all that kind of stuff.
So I think they have to probably work a little harder to like talk with me.
Or I also have to work a little harder to like muster up the courage.
But then another thing is I feel like if we establish a rapport and maybe it's just like a gut feeling, like I feel like they're pretty trustful.
I think that's a catalyst factor, because then maybe I'll share something that's more a part of my personal life.
And then that makes me feel closer to them.
Oh my God, people at work probably think of you as like a puzzle.
They're like oh, Crystal told me something about her boyfriend today, or like about her personal life.
New puzzle piece unlocked.
Oh my God.
Actually that kind of connects to like you wanting your partner to be devoted to you, or like maybe more enthusiastic.
Right, right.
It is a part of a game of like, okay, I trust you a little bit more today.
So here's a little morsel of my life.
Wow, thanks for sticking to the rebrand.
I corrected myself halfway.
Okay, that's interesting.
Maybe the pattern is that you value effort.
Oh wait, maybe you're right.
They have to put in the effort to like, get to know me.
Yeah Yeah, I think actually that ties in with something I thought about a lot.
When you see someone every day and you ask them the same question every day, it starts to feel very shallow kind of and I think we've talked about this before too like what helps when you are talking to people, like people at work, who you see every day, instead of asking like oh, how was your day?
Sometimes it's nice to be like oh, I remember you had told me yesterday that you, your kids, had a recital last night, so how did that go?
Versus you know, the less effort catch-all question.
Seeing some of that, if people can pick up on my morsels and ask specific questions.
And I think I also try to reciprocate that.
You're like Hansel and Gretel, leaving like breadcrumbs, seeing who picks it up.
So the other thing that we talked about for your romantic type was well-educated.
And hilariously, I low-key think that you can find that quality in work people as well.
You know, like maybe people who are the go-to person that just magically knows everything at work.
Do you feel like you are drawn to those people, whether as a work friend or as like a work mentor?
Shit, you might be right people who i think are really good workers.
Yes, i don't look up my co-workers on linkedin really, so i'll say it's not completely education based.
I think it's definitely seeing how they are in the workplace and whether i really respect their problem solving.
Maybe that's how i survey it in the workplace.
You're like guys, trust me higher degrees and like the good education just follows me.
I'm not seeking it out.
I didn't know.
Yeah, that's just a coincidence.
Well, what about amongst your close friends outside of work friendships?
Is there a pattern that you see?
And is it similar to the patterns that you see for romantic and work relationships?
All of your close friends have long, skinny fingers.
That's a really good question.
I think for close friends and stuff, a lot of it is kind of similar to where it's like they're a good person.
And that's like kind of the baseline.
And then I usually believe good people will always find ways to succeed.
And, you know, none of our friends are like bums.
Yeah.
I think they all have definitely an area where you can tell that's like their specialty, almost you know.
Yeah.
And yeah, I think at the end of the day it's like we have interesting and fun conversations and they're just fun to be around, I guess.
Honestly maybe this is like a similar thing where it's like education itself is not necessarily like an important thing, like i don't really care how merited you are or whatever, but if i feel like you are smart in your own way, which i do believe is true of like all my friends Yeah, I like that.
You know, one thing that I feel like might be a theme between your romantic type and your close friends is I consider you someone who has close friendships with like, older people.
Not necessarily like big age gap people, but I feel like a lot of your friends are slightly older than us.
And I feel like maybe it's for the same reason that you're attracted to like older romantic partners.
You like someone who is dependable that you can kind of fit into that like little sister archetype.
I think that's totally true, actually.
Yeah, like I can learn from them.
I can be like a little sister.
Okay, maybe this is some like trauma.
Okay.
Cause my older brother and I are like really close in age.
And then we kind of agreed early on, like he didn't want to be an older brother.
So we're like, okay, we're like equals basically.
But then I'm like, shoot.
But like now, now I want like an older sibling.
You're robbed of your little sister experience.
So maybe that's me seeking out slightly older people.
It's a theme.
All of these relationships are like just the same thing, but different aspects of life, you know?
Different skins.
So I have a final question to wrap up.
Until now, I think we've been trying to find similarities in factors that we look for across all of our friendships, whether that's at work, in our true friendships or in our romantic relationships.
But I feel like everyone has that one quality that you truly do not care what it is.
That quality... is super varied across all the relationships in life.
So what do you think your one quality that you truly do not give a fuck about is?
Whoa, that's hard.
I think maybe I don't really care what the person's job is.
As long as it's something that makes them happy and is like survivable, wait okay.
Counterpoint to this only because i feel like with friends it doesn't matter, but with a partner i feel like their career does matter.
So would you be okay if your partner was like a dj or like you know what i mean?
Or like a fisherman?
A fisherman yeah, I mean if they make enough money to survive and they like it, I think I don't mind them.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
But I guess I would know better when I'm actually in the situation.
Because maybe some jobs have certain caveats.
Like a DJ might have to travel a lot.
And that sounds okay to me right now.
But like maybe if I were in it, things are slightly different.
Yeah.
I don't know.
And, like a fisherman, might not have like a PhD.
They have a phd in fish, in biology, in marine biology.
Yeah honestly, your answer surprises me.
I feel like if you truly don't mind, then that's a good answer.
At least that's what i think.
Yeah, i think i don't mind as long as the logistics work out and like make sense.
Yeah, so i was thinking.
For me i don't really mind what member of the family they are, so like whether they're an only child, younger sibling, older sibling, middle sibling.
I feel like, looking across my friendships, there's not really like a major pattern.
Okay, but that's friendship, i mean relationships too.
Really, are you sure you're not into only children?
I feel like, if I open up my Rolodex, there was variation.
Okay.
What's it like to date an only child?
I have never done that.
Oh, it's amazing.
Best experience ever.
Would highly recommend.
Unbiased.
I think that's a really good one.
You're not picky about what archetype there is.
Younger sibling, older sibling.
Yeah.
Only child, middle child.
Yeah.
I think it's because I'm an only child.
So then it's like a blank slate almost.
You're like, I know I already have the best of any world.
So you can't even compete with me.
So it's fine.
Like it's all a new experience to me, you know?
Fair, fair.
Okay, another one that I have.
It's a select thing within a preference.
I want people to have hobbies, but I don't care what their hobbies are.
As long as it's like not illegal, I guess.
To see someone have like a passion for something.
I think that is like a pro.
But like what that passion is for, I'm not picky.
I guess the only thing is like wanting say like one shared hobby or something across most of your friendships, right?
So that there's something in common or relationship or whatever.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
Wait, I thought of something.
Sorry, this is not one that I don't care about.
This is actually one that I really care about.
Okay, let's hear it.
And I think it fits all categories.
I want someone who's down.
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
Because I think I sometimes have really like random whims, I guess.
I'm like, oh, I want to go do this right now.
And I want someone, especially I guess if they're a partner, I want them to be down.
Yeah.
I think that's an important one.
I mean, even at work, right?
It's like you want that co-worker.
That's like, oh my gosh, should we just go and like do this right now?
Like, yes.
And it brings so much energy and like breathes so much life into your day to day.
Yeah, like they can't be so uptight that every time I suggest something they're like no actually, like we can't do that.
Dude, I'm also dying because I've had so many conversations with your SO about how he and I are both uptight.
So every time you say the word uptight, I'm like, damn, this is an L for me and Crystal's baby.
It's okay.
I'm loosening him up.
Hopefully.
I have one factor that I do look for as well.
I feel like I really value people who are not picky eaters.
Oh, I like that one.
Yeah, everyone has their like one or two things that they don't prefer.
And I feel like that's fine.
But I think there are people who have pretty restrictive guidelines on what they prefer to eat in their day to day.
And I'm just that doesn't jive with me, you know?
Yeah.
They're like, I'm deathly allergic to 10 things.
You're like, that's past the limit.
No, I'm just thinking of like people who can only eat chicken tenders.
Sorry to all people with allergies.
My apologies.
No, I get what you mean, though.
I think it maybe relates to like having an open mind, which I can totally understand.
And I think it's totally fair if someone's like they don't like the food, but they were willing to try it.
Yes.
Yes.
And that rings true for you for like every category of ships.
Yeah, although I guess I don't really mind as much if my work bestie was like I don't like to eat this.
I wouldn't be like, we can't be friends anymore.
What if you had lunch with your work besties every day and they just ate chicken tenders every single day?
I guess I would just be like, yeah, I don't know.
Maybe it's one of those things that subconsciously I would be like Hmm, maybe we're not that compatible.
Damn, this episode is me finding out I'm judgmental AF for no reason.
You're like, hmm, chicken tenders again, huh?
Oh, what'd you get today?
Oh, I see, the huge...
Although alternatively, I actually do have co-workers who eat salad every day.
And I guess I'm never like judging that.
Dude, I was just about to say I feel like salad is a common one, but for some reason it doesn't feel wrong.
Yeah, yeah.
Because that to me feels like there's like intentionality behind their restrictiveness, you know?
They're like choosing salad because it's healthy.
But chicken tender seems like you're choosing it because you can't stomach any other option.
Hey man, maybe they just really like chicken tenders.
You're right.
I think I just value the illusion of choice.
Same, same.
Also with like salad, you know, you could mix up the toppings.
Yeah, yeah.
Ooh, you got cherry tomatoes today.
Corn yesterday.
Ranch today and olive oil tomorrow.
You know, what I'm realizing through all the jokes and stuff through this episode is that I feel like in our actions or like these small things that we choose to do every day, there's a little bit of implication of our true personality or our true preferences.
So part of me is kind of interested to decode the people that we choose to be close to and find patterns amongst our friendships.
But another part of me is like, what are the energies and like the feelers that I'm putting out into the world?
You know, these small minute actions?
Oh true, what categories have we been satisfying in our friends?
Yes types, how would my work friends describe me?
How would my partner describe me?
Are you james's type?
Shit, i hope so.
Oh shit actually, that's crazy like.
Am i my so's type?
Like, do they have a type time to pick a fight tonight and ask yeah, i'll go grill him later.
Sorry, before we wrap up though, now i have a final question for us.
Do you think it's better or worse that you fall into, like the person you're dating's type?
You meet their friends and then later you find out they're like, she's so your type.
You always date people like this.
Is that a good or a bad thing?
Okay, I was actually thinking about this recently.
And I would prefer to not fall into the type.
And I think that just has to do with my personality.
I find it very hard not to compare.
So then, if there's like direct comparisons, me and two other girls share the same exact qualities, I think it would eat me up alive.
But if you're more confident in yourself, you don't care about those things.
Like you don't tend to compare directly as much as I do.
I feel like it's fine.
Just for me, since I'm sensitive to those things, it would just kill me.
Yeah.
All right.
I care for a different reason.
Oh, okay.
I'm like, dude, am I not like special?
You don't want to be just one of the other girls.
Yeah.
I can fall into like some general type stuff.
But I think what saves it is like if I have a unique thing outside of that.
Right.
And or there's maybe like a couple differences that deviate from the typical type.
Yeah yeah, if you're like easily able to discern okay, she's different from me.
This is like a carbon copy of yourself.
Okay, do you want to know a really funny thing?
Yeah, i don't remember if i ever said this on the pod.
One of my partners back in like high school or whatever, after we broke up, he dated someone with the same name as me And I also dated someone with the same name as him.
Totally coincidental.
Was that at the same time?
No.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
It just happened to be that way.
I still think that's pretty funny, though.
Add that to the type.
That name.
No.
No, that name's banned now.
All right, sorry to have interrupted you wrapping us up like two or three times, but we're ready to finally wrap up.
This was fun and I think it's always helpful, slash funny to have someone who's not stuck in your mind help connect the dots of it.
And describe what they are seeing.
So thank you Jisoo, for spending the last hour with me chatting about what might or might not be our types in life.
And for our listeners out there.
If you have any funny type descriptions or common patterns of types in your life, feel free to share with us.
We have social media. at eatyourcrustpod.
And we also have email eatyourcrustpod at gmail.com.
And if you'd like to catch our other episodes, then don't forget to follow us on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
We upload new episodes every other Wednesday morning.
Thanks for listening.
And don't forget to eat your crust.
