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What are the four types of attachment in our relationships?
Thanks for asking. The types of attachment were theorized by British psychologist John Bolbe in the 1950s.
They're widely used to help us understand how we react to situations in our relationships, whether it be with romantic partners, friends, or family members.
Bolbe relied on research on the impact of early separations between infants and their mothers and emphasized the importance of attachment relationships in the social and emotional development of children, as well as their long -term mental health.
During the 1970s, American psychologist Mary Ainsworth expanded on Bolbe's work, helping him develop an observational method to assess different types of attachment in children and adults.
What exactly is an attachment style?
According to Psychology Today, our attachment style is the way we establish bonds with other people, which develops in infancy, and becomes refined in children, adolescents, and adults.
In simple terms, it's the way you interact with those around you.
There are four main types of attachment.
The first is secure attachment.
Children with secure attachment feel safe and protected when they're with their parents or caregivers.
They seek comfort from them when they feel anxious or scared, but are also capable of exploring the world around them, knowing they can always return to their attachment figure if needed.
The second type is avoidant attachment.
Children with avoidant attachment tend to avoid or ignore their parents or caregivers when they feel anxious or scared.
They're less likely to seek comfort from them, and prefer to explore the world without their assistance.
What about the other two types, then?
The third type is anxious attachment.
Children with anxious ambivalent attachment constantly seek attention from their parents or caregivers, but struggle to be reassured even when they're close to them.
They may appear preoccupied with the possibility of being abandoned, and can be highly reactive to signs of separation.
Finally, the fourth type is disorganized or chaotic attachment.
It's characterized by a child's paradoxical and disorganized behavior in the presence of their attachment figure.
This type of attachment is less common, and brings chaos into the lives of those affected.
Their emotions can be excessive and devastating, and at times the person may seem absent or disconnected from reality.
There are many online tests which can help you work out your attachment style.
It generally stems directly from our childhoods.
If you're not aware of it and haven't considered it before, it tends to remain the same throughout your life.
But looking into it may help you understand your reactions towards friends or partners in certain situations.
You may even learn to predict your own response, and with time develop a more secure attachment style.
There you have it. Now you know what the four types of attachment are.
In under three minutes we answer your questions, and help you understand the true meaning behind the trends, concepts and acronyms that are making headlines.
Listen along and you will really know it for sure.
