at the last day of our Mindful Music segment week.
So today's song and lyrics actually came to me during one of my mindful reflection sessions I allow myself to have.
They go like this. And I just had to live.
And I want to give, I'm completely positive.
The time has come for me to break out of this shell.
For me, these lyrics speak to the power of being a good person and not letting anybody or anything hold you back from your goals or dreams.
And also the power of being your authentic self.
Now, as I stated, this song and these lyrics came to me during one of my mindful reflecting sessions where I allow myself time to reflect on some aspect of my past.
During this particular session, I was thinking about my bartending days.
When I was in graduate school for acupuncture in New York, I worked as a bartender on the side for extra money.
I actually thoroughly enjoyed it, engaging with the customers and hearing their wild and crazy stories.
That was the best. And I also enjoyed the people that I worked with.
After working at a few spots, I landed at a popular restaurant in Long Island.
I worked mostly weekends.
They were a mix of really crazy and funny characters that I worked with.
The one who stood out was a guy that we called O.
O was a server or waiter.
He was in his early 30s and he was openly gay.
And remember, this was the early 2000s.
So as crazy as it sounds, this was still heavily frowned upon, especially where I'm from, but he didn't care.
He was out. He was proud and he was hilarious.
He had a snapback for everything.
I remember this one time, he had placed a dirty glass in the wrong spot on the bar and was walking away.
Oh, the glass doesn't go there, man.
I said this to his back as he was walking away.
He twirled around, looked me dead in my face for a dramatic second, and then said, will are your hands broken?
And then promptly turned back around and continued on his way.
I had to laugh. You just couldn't even get angry with O.
I think it was his confidence and self -assuredness that prevented anyone from truly getting upset with his antics.
I remember I had a really great conversation with him one night after the last shift.
He was at the bar waiting for his cut of the tips, and I just asked him about his life.
Surprisingly, he opened right up.
He revealed to me that he was abused as a young boy.
He knew that he was gay for most of his life, but he kept it hidden.
He had numerous romantic relationships with women and didn't come out until he was in his early twenties.
When I asked him what made him finally come out, he said it was a good platonic friend of his who identified as queer and instilled in him the confidence and the strength to be himself.
This friend also convinced O to seek out counseling, and O said that that was hugely beneficial also.
So yeah, these lyrics are just so appropriate for how O described his life journey to me.
And I just had to live.
And I want to give.
I'm completely positive.
The time has come for me to break out of this shell.
O allowed himself to break out of his shell and to be his authentic self, being positive in how he wanted to live his life.
I'll never forget how O made me feel after that conversation.
I felt empowered and courageous to be my authentic self fully.
These days, I have my mindfulness and meditation practice to lean on for this reminder and as a source of reinforcement.
But O was that person from my past that had a great impact on my life in regards to having self -confidence.
One thing he said that I will never forget, it doesn't matter what anyone thinks of you.
You have to be happy with you first and foremost.
Okay, let's end it there, party people.
I invite you to check out the meditation in the app called building self confidence.
And today's song is I'm coming out by Diana Ross, which is wildly appropriate for what I discussed today.
I truly hope you enjoyed my segment of mindful music this time around.
It's always a privilege.
Please continue to send me any questions or thoughts that you may have to my Instagram at Keisunga gisgombay and to my email as keisunga at headspace .com.
All right, until next time, everyone, peace and blessings always.
Thank you.
