I'm trying not to cry.
I'm just like, um, I hate suffering.
I've suffered myself and so I hate to see anybody suffer.
And so, um, this is my mission.
This is what I'm made for.
And, um, I'm just one guy that I can't do everything, but I can do a lot.
Um, I always try to help people say, how can you turn your worst day into your best day?
Please help me.
Welcome to the stage.
He's the nation's number one life and business strategist.
He's worked with royalty, elite athletes, Oscar winners, scientists and everyone in between to overcome their limitations and accelerate change.
Can you take us back to the environment that shaped you into the man that you are?
So I grew up in a tough environment.
I had four different fathers.
My mom, she drank alcohol and took prescription drugs.
We had no money, no food.
And then the thing that changed my whole life was a knock on the door on Thanksgiving.
There was this tall guy standing there with two bags of groceries and an uncooked frozen turkey in a pan.
And my dad saw this man.
He said, we don't take charity.
And he went and slammed the door on the guy.
But it became a very useful indistinction for me about how he and I processed that day differently, because there's three decisions you make every moment of your life, and the real problem is the story you have.
For example, that day, my dad's focus was the fact he might fit his family and he was worthless.
However, i took that as stranger's care, and so the story is the belief you've told yourself over and over, because belief is the invisible force that controls everything in your life.
And then there's the third decision what am i going to do?
And so what i decided to do is someday i'm going to do this for others and end suffering where i can't, And so I'm going to show you how to get clear on what you really want, figure out what's been stopping you, put the plan in place and teach you the most important thing that's made me successful.
And I don't think people fully realize the significance of how many of the most influential people on planet Earth you have worked with and continue to work with.
What is the pattern that you noticed in those people?
So I found four things with them.
And the first thing is, Just give me 30 seconds of your time.
Two things I wanted to say.
The first thing is a huge thank you for listening and tuning into the show week after week.
It means the world to all of us.
And this really is a dream that we absolutely never had and couldn't have imagined getting to this place.
But secondly, it's a dream where we feel like we're only just getting started.
And if you enjoy what we do here, please join the 24 of people that listen to this podcast regularly and follow us on this app.
Here's a promise I'm going to make to you.
I'm going to do everything in my power to make this show as good as I can now and into the future.
We're going to deliver the guests that you want me to speak to and we're going to continue to keep doing all of the things you love about this show.
I was shocked.
It was so surprising to me that you had the childhood you had, based on the outcomes that you've accomplished in your life.
And, as someone that has followed you for a very long time, I imagine that there's many other people that have followed you for a very long time that have no idea about the early context.
For those people, can you take us back to the environment that shaped you into the man that you are?
I think, you know, I grew up, I grew up in a tough environment.
I had four different fathers.
My mom was a very intense and passionate woman.
We never had any money.
We were very, very poor.
My mom was probably the most important influence in my life by far.
Very loving woman but a very stressed woman.
And under that stress, she drank alcohol and took prescription drugs.
And when she did that, she became very violent.
So I took the brunt of that and then figured out how to manage her emotions, basically.
That's where all my beginning training really happened.
And yet at the same time, she was loving and she pushed me.
She believed in me.
She wanted me to be something.
So she influenced my life in so many beautiful ways.
And then probably what changed my life the most though, is my forefather especially Made it clear no one gives a damn about anybody else.
We lived in what I thought was an upper class community or city, but we were on the other side of the tracks.
It was lower middle class.
We were literally right by the railroad tracks where the worst of the worst lived, so to speak.
And so we kind of looked down on.
And so it really looked like nobody cares.
And then the thing that changed my whole life, a single event was a knock on the door on Thanksgiving.
We had no money, no food.
When I say no food, we had crackers and peanut butter, but not a Thanksgiving dinner, right?
And my dad has been, mom are screaming each other through a door and my dad had lost his job.
You get the knock on the door and I go open the door and there's this tall guy standing there with two bags of groceries, one in each hand.
And at his feet, he had an uncooked frozen turkey in a pan, you know?
And he said, is your father here?
And I was like, just one moment, you know?
And I was like, it was Christmas morning.
And so I go to my dad and I go, hey, dad, there's someone at the door for you.
And he goes, who is it?
And I said, I don't know.
It's for you.
He goes, well, you answer.
I said, all right, dude, it's for you.
So he goes over there and I'm waiting like with such excitement for him to open the door.
And he saw this man and he was not happy.
He looked at this man before the guy said he had a word and he said, we don't take charity.
And he went and slammed the door on the guy.
But the man had leaned in because of the groceries and hit his shoulder and it bounced off, which made my dad even madder.
And they said, sir, sir, he said, somebody knows you're having a tough time.
Everyone has tough times.
They want you to have this food for your family for Thanksgiving because I'm just the delivery guy.
And my father said, we don't take charity.
And he pushed the door again.
But this time, because the guy's leaning, his foot now stepped in.
It hit his foot and bounced off.
And then now my dad's getting more fired up and I'm standing looking at this whole thing and it's like a car crash happening.
And the guy said something to my dad.
I thought my dad was going to punch him in the face.
He didn't say it meanly.
He said, sir, he said, he saw me.
He said, don't make your family suffer because of your ego.
And I can still see it like it was yesterday.
My dad's veins on both sides of his neck were just pumping and he was red as can be.
And then he just dropped his shoulders.
He took the groceries.
He slammed it on the table and he slammed the door.
And he never even said thank you.
It took me maybe a decade to eventually figure it out.
It became a very useful and distinction for me about how he and I process that day differently, because I believe there's three decisions you make every moment of your life.
You're making them right now if you're listening to me and so is your audience.
The first one is what are you going to focus on?
You're going to be focused on what happened yesterday, what you're going to have for lunch, what I'm saying, how it relates to you.
There are millions of things you can focus on, but you don't experience life.
Experience the life you focus on.
And most of us are distortion deletion creatures.
Our brains don't take it all in consciously.
It's too much.
So our brains delete things.
We distort things.
We generalize things so we can make it through our lives.
And so if you don't control your focus, you react.
And that day, my dad's focus was on the fact that he did not fit his family.
It wasn't hard to figure out.
He said it over and over again after he slammed the door.
And my focus was, wow, there's food.
What a concept.
I was excited.
But the second decision you make every moment, the minute you focus on something your brain has to figure out.
What does this mean?
Is this the end of the beginning?
Is this person dissing me?
Are they challenging me?
Are they coaching me?
Are they loving me?
And whatever meaning you give it produces emotion.
And out of that emotion, you make the third decision, what am I going to do?
And that day, I know the meaning my dad did.
It wasn't just that he didn't feed his family.
It's that he was worthless.
You know, I can't even feed my family.
And he muttered all this stuff continuously.
But I took that as stranger's care.
It completely violated everything I had experienced in my life up until that point.
And my brain was like if a stranger doesn't even want credit for this.
And they fed my family on Thanksgiving—.
I gotta care about strangers.
And so what I decided to do is someday I'm gonna do this for others.
And so when I was 17, I went out and I didn't have a lot of money, but I was doing okay.
And I went to a grocery store and I told the manager what happened in my life.
And I said, I wanna feed two families, help me out, give me a discount.
And he gave me 10% off, and I thought cheap bastard, but I took it.
I had the most enjoyable shopping.
I took two shopping carts and just filled it up for two families.
And then I called this church and I said who do you know that needs help, but won't ask for it, won't come for it?
And they gave me two families' names.
And so I wrote a little note.
I just put, this is a gift from a friend.
Everyone has tough times.
I hope you have a beautiful Thanksgiving.
And someday, if you can, pay this forward.
I didn't use the word pay it forward.
I said, do this for someone else.
But now you look at this, pay it forward.
And I put, love a friend.
And then I realized I was going to the barrio area of the city.
And I was like, maybe they don't speak English.
So I had a friend of mine write in Spanish on the back.
So I figured I could flip it over.
And the first house I went to, it was a little tiny place.
I knock on the door and this woman, about this tall Hispanic woman, sees me and sees the food and screams.
And then grabs my head and pulls it down and starts kissing me on the cheek.
I said, no, no, no, delivery boy, delivery boy.
And I pull out the note and I flipped it over in Spanish and she read it and then she started to cry.
And she goes, and she started giving me a kiss again.
I said, no, delivery boy.
She goes, no, gift of God, gift of God.
And I'm trying not to cry.
I'm just like, I feel like it was yesterday still.
And so...
The door opened.
It's a tiny little place.
The size of your kitchen here.
Reminder of your kitchen.
And I was so excited.
I stuck food down.
All of a sudden, I heard screams.
And then next thing I know, I'm hit by one and then by another.
Four boys.
One hit one leg.
One hit the other.
They saw the food.
They went crazy.
And I said, come help me.
We had other stuff in the van.
And when they saw the pumpkin pie, it was really over, you know.
And we bottled this food in and it was time to go.
And the father had left them.
I found out later, four days before Thanksgiving, with no money and no food.
And anyway, I'm looking through the mirror and I just started crying uncontrollably.
And I'm like, why am I crying so bad?
This is such a beautiful moment.
And I just realized, you know, my worst day of my life was really my best day.
The day that was the most painful to me because that father is the one who adopted me.
I carry his name.
I wouldn't be there that day.
I'm a good human being, but would I work as hard as I worked to feed other people?
Next year, I did four, then eight, then 12.
I had a little company.
I got my employees involved.
I got to a million people, two million people.
Then about 12 years ago—
I just thought I want to feed a billion meals here in the United States in 10 years.
And so it's grown and grown and grown, all from not being fed.
And so I see it as a blessing.
I always try to help people say, how can you turn your worst day into your best day?
That's when life is really magical.
How many years has it been since you met that young mother with her four children?
I was 17.
I'm going to be 66.
Wow.
50 years.
Yeah.
And it still brings you to tears to recount that story.
It really does.
Why is that?
I have a – I hate suffering.
I've suffered myself, and so I hate to see anybody suffer.
And so I'm unbelievably driven to end suffering where I can, to help anyone do that, whether it be hunger, or emotional hunger, or depression, or sadness, or a relationship or – I just – I don't know what it is.
I just – I love human beings.
I hate suffering, and I hate – and I love to see when somebody awakens to who they are.
And we all are so much more than we ever – you know, perceive ourself to be.
But many times you don't discover that until you have to.
I like to try and show people how to do it so they don't have to wait till life hits them.
You know anything you can imagine.
We're all going to go through extreme stress in our lives, but how do you use stress to distress you?
And so my whole thing is help people, show them how to use stress, because I don't care how good a person you are.
I don't care how spiritual or religious you are.
I don't care how smart you are, how rich you think you are.
Every human being is going to go through extreme stress multiple times in their life.
And the real question is, what are you going to do with it?
And the first thing is, if you're going through hell, keep going.
But if you keep going, you discover, number one, how strong you really are.
Because if you don't give up, you'll discover who you are.
The second you find out is who your real friends are, because when things aren't so great, you're going to see who those are.
And then third, it almost gives you like an inoculation to future stress.
Because I got a friend that was shot down in Vietnam and was in a prison there for seven years in solitary confinement.
And Captain Coffee is his name.
And I remember I met him later in life.
And he was going through this tough thing with the IRS.
And it was so unfair.
It took him three years.
He got his money back.
But I said, doesn't that drive you crazy?
He goes...
After I've been with a North Vietnamese, he goes, you know, what could the IRS do to me?
So I think those pieces are there.
But everyone gets called on the journey.
Most people try to resist it.
But that journey, that's what the call is.
It's a call to grow.
So I'm big on change your story, change your life.
And I'm big on understanding the narrative of where you are in the story of your life.
Because if you understand where you are, it gives context.
It gives meaning.
And it doesn't make you feel overwhelmed.
Had your mother not suffered in such a way, do you think this would be so important to you?
Had you not observed that suffering?
Yeah, no, I've often said, like I said earlier, I think I'm a good human being.
I think I still help people.
But would I provide 62 billion meals working around the clock, on top of, you know, my 114 companies and all that.
No, I don't think I would.
That hunger comes very often from pain, but pain's not enough to keep you going.
Pain only goes so far.
You've got to find something that it's like I tell people there's two types of motivation, right?
There's push motivation.
You know, you're making something happen.
And I have enormous willpower.
I'm sure you do.
Most of the people we probably interact with have great willpower, right?
But there's still a limit to it.
There's no limit to pull motivation.
Pull is there's something so magnificent?
You want to serve something that you care about more than yourself.
That's where all the energy in life comes from.
You know what's in your heart and your soul, what wakes you up in the morning and makes you go.
And I think if I hadn't had the pain, I don't think I would have been sensitized.
But I also.
If I hadn't felt the pleasure of serving and seeing impact on such a large scale, then you'd be limited.
Because listen, meeting your own needs is not that hard.
Like my biggest beef with right now since COVID is this whole self-care revolution we've got.
I mean, you've got to take care of yourself.
Don't get me wrong.
I take care of myself.
And, you know, you get weaker and weaker the more you focus on yourself.
The human mind is always going to figure out something that isn't good enough.
But when you're serving, you're not there.
Like your mind's not there.
You're with the people.
You're with what you're doing.
And it's the escape from the mind's reductionism.
And so I really believe that people, the secret to life is to find something you care about more than yourself that gives you that pull motivation.
And then you're never going to lack for energy.
You're never going to lack for passion.
You're never going to lack for anything.
And you're going to have a life that's extremely meaningful.
It's not happy every moment.
There's not meant to be.
If you smile, have you ever smiled so much your face hurt?
We need variety.
But meaning, that's something you can find no matter what.
I asked you before we started recording a question.
I almost never ask any of my guests, which is what is the thing that we should be talking about the most?
And you told me shortly after what your answer was.
But even shortly after that, you then went on to talk to me about how you're driven to end suffering.
Now, if I compare these two answers the answer you gave me to the question I asked about what's the most important thing for us to be talking about, and your second point about your desire to end suffering there's probably some kind of overlap.
It is, yeah.
So if I were to ask you, just because we weren't recording, then what you think maybe the most consequential thing we should be talking about right now is, as it relates to suffering and everything that's going on in society, what would that answer be?
I think it's AI, but it's not just AI, it's nanotechnology.
It's how technology, the rapid change in technology, and if you don't believe it's going to destroy humanity and it's going to liberate us from a lot of labor, if you believe that the ones that promote that concept.
If that does happen and we displace this many jobs in this short a period of time.
Jobs are not just money.
Jobs are meaning.
It's not the only form of meaning, but it's meaning.
So it's like you talk about well, we'll give people UBI, and okay, I think you might have to, because the change is going to happen so rapidly.
Like I said, you know, farming, 80% of us were farmers 150 years ago.
Now it's 3% and we feed the world.
That's a long transition.
I think I mentioned to you off the air here I was visiting with President Obama 10 years ago and towards the end of his term there.
And I was saying, hey, I just got to talk to you.
You know, you inherited a pretty tough economy from the original 2008 explosion breakdown.
We lost 8 million jobs.
So I said there's technology coming right now that we can predict is going to displace more than those 8 million jobs.
And I talked to him at that time just about – I said, just take one, like self-driving cars.
They're just starting to come out.
I said, in the next 10, 12, 13, 14 years, they're going to become ubiquitous.
And I said, there's 8 million truck drivers, Uber drivers, and taxi drivers.
And –
Are you doing anything to retool them?
I said because just in the US, just in the US.
I said because, if you don't think about this, I'm a business person and I can hire a person to drive a truck only eight hours a day.
I have to pay for the health care, which gets more expensive every year.
They're going to bitch at me about things and I can buy a truck.
They can drive 24 hours a day.
My insurance is cheaper because it doesn't make mistakes and I can depreciate the asset.
Am I going to hire anybody?
I said, so those jobs are going to go away.
That's 8 million jobs.
That's one sector.
We can look at pharma.
I mean, there's so many industries affected.
So I said we've got to retool those people now, where there's 10 years to gear them up, because these are not people that are going to do it on their own.
And they're going to be shocked.
The shock to their system, the loss of dignity, of being a troll agency of their own life, of their own job, of their own direction, is huge.
And if you go back to like the Luddites, You know, you're from the UK, right?
You must know your history there.
1800s, you know, mercantile.
They come up with these machines.
And how do people react?
And by the way, this story is the same across history.
We have a radical change like this.
All these people are displaced.
And what do they do?
They rioted.
They took hammers and they destroyed those machines.
They threatened to kill the owners of those companies, and some were shot and killed.
They blew up and firebombed places.
And what did the UK do about this?
They passed a law in the first year of this.
These Luddites saying you destroy a machine, it's capital punishment.
They hung people.
Because they couldn't have them destroy the growth of the economy, right?
And guess what?
Fifteen years later, the same thing happened again with the thrashers.
Thrasher machines that were used for wheat and they lost all the jobs and the people and the government overreacted.
I'm not trying to be overly dramatic, but if anybody thinks this transition is just going to be smooth by us doing nothing, they're wrong.
And the problem is, as I mentioned to you before, I think the leverage— is not in favor of us taking care of society.
The leverage is the carrot and the stick.
The carrot is.
I can make a trillion dollars if I have the right LLM or, you know, if I get to artificial general intelligence, who knows?
And if we don't do it, China's going to do it.
That's the stick.
And then they're going to run the world.
So there's no focus on safety virtually, as you well know.
And there's certainly no focus on what's happening with these jobs right now.
High school students are getting jobs more than college students for the first time in 50 years.
Right?
You see the displacement.
You know.
You've got friends just like I do.
Mark Benioff is one of my dear friends.
They let go of like – what was it?
I think it was 5,000 customer service agents and now it's done with AI now.
Now he wants to elevate them to other jobs.
So we have to look at what this means to our society.
We have to anticipate what this means, and we've got to retool not just the jobs but the psychology, because –.
People talk about a post-work world.
You hear people talk about this all the time.
Elon, people like that.
Labor is like electricity.
You just take it for granted.
It's so cheap.
It's so easy.
Well, if that's true, and he's talking three to five years.
A lot of people say Elon's early.
He usually is on his predictions.
But Ray Kurzweil is a good friend of mine.
He's the most accurate predictor of technology in history.
And he's been saying 2029 for almost 20 years. is when you have artificial general intelligence.
If you go to Hinton, I think you've interviewed Hinton, haven't you?
Right?
So he's the longest.
He's saying 2030 to 2040.
He's given us a little more room.
In the next three to 10 years, this is going to happen.
How are we prepared for this?
And so this is the questions I'm trying to bring up to people that have influence to say if you're in business, you got to take a look at this.
If you're in government, you got to take a look at this.
And so I just got.
They haven't announced yet, but I just got selected to be on the Federal Advisory Committee for the president and for the health and human services.
I'm on the mental health side and I'm hoping to use that position to bring more of government's focus into this category as well, because it's got to be addressed.
When we recite these- And that's, by the way, the answer to your question is, and that's suffering.
That's suffering at the highest level, not just financial suffering.
That's emotional suffering.
That's loss of identity suffering.
If I am a coder, I am a truck driver, and I lose who I am.
Now, I just want to say one last thing.
We've already been in a post-work world, because one person said to me recently well, for 4000 years we've tied our identity to our work.
I said, no, Americans all go, what do you do?
Not everybody in the world does that.
And For 4000 years our connection before the agricultural revolution was really what tribe we're connected to.
And our sense of significance was maybe our courage in battle, not our financial component.
Or maybe it was our creativity, our poetry, our storytelling capacity.
Or maybe it was our generosity.
Maybe it was our wisdom.
So we can find other things to have meaning besides a job.
But if you don't take a culture that's been conditioned for 200 years to think a certain way, we're going to have a lot of pain.
And I would like to see us have less of that if we could.
And I'm only one person, but I'll do my best to help people make that transition.
It's funny because when we think about those historical examples of transition I, for many reasons, think this is even more extreme.
I agree.
Because you have intelligence and you have, you've basically disrupted both the muscles and the mind.
But you know, the reason it's going to explode even faster is because we're moving from LLMs to now actually studying visually what's happening in the real world.
And when robots do that, then the game changes their tempo of learning.
And just think about this.
You and I are having a conversation.
I picked up one of your books here and I'm reading through your book, so I'm going to get a feel for who you are and everything else before I came here.
I've seen some of your videos, and I really enjoyed it.
But I had to go get that.
I had to take a couple hours to dig through that.
You and I have a conversation.
If either one of us learns something, you're a machine.
Every machine knows it instantly.
You push one button and they have all that knowledge.
There's none of this word transfer.
It's just it's now.
So people don't realize what this really means.
And when you're learning from the real world, not just LLMs.
Right now, you and I, our brains are predictive devices.
They're predicting what is going to happen next to the best of our ability.
And we're trying to close that gap as much as we can or we get jolted.
Well, think how predictably that's going to do to people's heads when, all of a sudden, their labor is not needed.
And it's no longer blue-collar labor, which is what people thought it would be.
It's white-collar labor.
I mean, like my financial – I have a lot of – I own 95 different private equity firms.
I own the firms, not the actual funds, right?
So I get the two and 20 of them.
And I got pieces of all of them.
So they're the biggest in the world.
And so I get to take a look at some of the things that are happening so fast.
And I look at all those jobs and I see people in those industries and –
Quantum is taking – it took over maybe five years ago.
I've seen the shrink in these offices from staffs, the guys who are making 5 million, 10 million a year that are now unemployed.
It's not just the blue-collar worker.
It's everyone.
So you're right.
This has never happened before in history.
And what's being done about it?
More money's been put into it to accelerate it.
The carrot and stick, the trillionaire and China, those two pieces are driving it all.
And a few people are trying to hammer like Kenton and a few other people.
We got to work on safety here so it doesn't eliminate the human race.
And I'm not a reactionary person, but you know of what is it?
25, 30 percent of the people that work in AI say that they think it could potentially do that.
I mean, you could use electricity to kill people or light up a city.
So all technology has that challenge.
But this is a different technology.
This is a technology that keeps learning, can replicate itself.
Right now, they don't even know how some of this actually works.
They don't know how the AI is actually working.
It's teaching itself.
These AIs now have their own language.
I'm sure you know.
They're talking no longer in English to each other.
And you know I'm sure you've seen the studies right where they give them information in the email and then they say they're going to shut off the AI.
And it blackmails them by giving them fake information that somebody having an affair and it blackmails them.
I mean, it lies.
So we're living in a crazy world where the opportunity is greater than any time in history for us to be creators.
We were created and we're meant to create.
And we've got tools to create like never before.
But we're going to have to make sure that, as we're doing that, we've got some parameters around safety and some parameters about what does it do to society.
And I don't have the perfect answers for it, but I do know one thing.
Retooling is the answer.
And I don't believe most people will be replaced by an AI.
They'll be replaced by somebody who knows how to use AI.
Yeah, one of the things you said that really blew my mind when I watched a video from Boston Dynamics this week where the guy explained how these robots are going to learn.
And he goes, there's two ways.
One way is we're going to get our factory workers to wear a suit.
And every time the factory worker does something, all the robots are going to learn that thing.
And the other thing is he said, is if one of our robots learns something whether it's how to pick up a book or how to make an omelet every robot learns it instantaneously.
And my mind was like, wow.
That is, I personally... don't know where this leaves us.
So that's kind of.
Well, neither do I, but there are certain things you know it's leading us towards.
You know it's going to lead us to a great deal of violence, because there are going to be people, like have always happened with.
Technology displaces them.
Only this is going to be our global event across multiple areas, and not just drivers of Ubers and truck drivers.
If we don't get our act together and have a plan, there's going to be violence for some period of time.
There'll be.
There's that grief, period of loss, and that people go through when something jars them that much.
And some people don't return from that grief.
And some people are going to take this technology and they're going to go off.
It's already happening now even without AI.
There are more males at home 25 to 35 living at home with their family, not working than any time in human history, including the Depression.
Right.
There are I think it's 25 percent or if it was 30 percent.
I forgot the number.
Just saw it recently of young men have never approached a woman to ask her out for a date.
They play video games all day long.
Their mom does their laundry and they order Uber Eats.
This is a mass number of people.
That's just the technology of getting somebody gamified.
Imagine with AI.
So some people are going to go live there and some people are going to go the Star Trek route and say I'm going to figure out what makes human existence be here.
But it's not hard to figure out.
The majority are not going to go the Star Trek route.
And so we've got to have a bridge because of the time compression.
If this was 100 years to do it, we could adjust.
There will be more jobs.
There'll be new jobs.
There'll be new time.
But it's the timeframe that I'm most concerned about.
So when you ask me what I'm concerned about, that's what I'm concerned about, because it creates suffering.
And it's something that we can predict is going to create suffering.
And yet I see very few people in positions of influence and power doing much about it.
So, on an individual level, if you were an 18-year-old Tony Robbins, What would you be doing at this moment?
What would you be focusing on work-wise?
How would you be designing your life for such a world?
I have five kids and five grandkids, right?
So I have a 52-year-old daughter, and I have a, thanks to COVID, a four-year-old daughter.
So COVID was good to me.
I was home.
So I look at my especially my grandkids and my daughter and I say they're entering a world that none of us have known before.
And so how do I arm them for it?
And the answer is a couple of things.
Number one, I have to teach them not to do what most people in the world do.
Most people you talk to, of any even quote successful people, whatever that means.
They're stressed all the time.
Stress.
I'm so stressed.
You hear people talk about stress all the time.
It's like they argue about who's more stressed.
And I look at that and go, why are they stressed?
And the answer is because they're managing their life.
We're not made to manage circumstances.
We're made to create.
We were created by something.
Call it your creator, call it the universe, call it God, whatever you want to call it.
And we were made to create.
And when we create, we're alive.
When we just try to maintain or manage or hold on to something.
If we're just caught up in making a living instead of designing a life, life is a bitch.
And that's why so many people have so many challenges.
So I'm teaching my kids to be creators.
And I teach them the second piece, the most important thing, I believe, that's made me successful.
And anyone I've ever interviewed, you interviewed a million people.
See if you agree or disagree with me.
The three most important skills in life now are the ones that allow you to learn more rapidly.
If you learn rapidly, you can win no matter what happens with the technology.
And what are those three skills?
Number one, the skill of pattern recognition.
When you can recognize patterns, you eliminate fear.
Fear comes from, this has never happened before.
I don't know what this is.
Chaos.
Like I hear people all the time talk about how we've never been this place politically.
We're here in America.
We're the most, we're going to have a civil war.
They don't do any history whatsoever.
I have these two placards that I have because back then they didn't have ads, right?
They had placards.
And one is from Thomas Jefferson talking about Adams and one for Adams about Jefferson.
And they said stuff that made Republicans and Democrats look like they're nice to each other.
I mean, it's just unbelievable the stuff they said.
This is a cycle.
And so when you recognize a pattern, it gives you power, potential power at least.
The first power is you're not afraid anymore.
You go, no, this is not something that's never happened.
This is not something that's – I can see this.
I can see how this has been dealt with.
What took us from living in fear from being –
Hunter-gatherers are trying to survive every day.
Didn't know if we're going to survive every day to being able to stay in one place.
What pattern recognition?
I was going to say the seasons.
You got it.
Really?
That's it, the seasons.
I figured you'd get it.
The seasons, because before that, you could do the right thing at the wrong time, and you get pain.
And three of the four seasons are the wrong time.
So once we figured out, oh my God, if I plant in the spring and I take care of it through the hot summer, I get this big reaping.
And if I hang on to some of it to make it through the winter, I can live here.
I don't have to worry.
All my fear disappears.
So the minute we understood seasons, it changed humanity.
And by the way, there's the seasons to your life. you could say zero to 21 is springtime.
Springtime, how hard is it for something to grow in springtime?
If you start a business in an economic spring where everybody's optimistic, you think you're a genius.
You're just in the right season, right.
So zero to 21, you're taken care of.
And that season you grow like crazy.
Somewhere around, roughly, everyone's different, 21, 22 years old.
You go to the next stage, 22 to 42, and that's your summertime.
That's the testing period of your life.
What happens?
You are 21.
You've heard all this stuff.
And now you go, you know what?
I don't know if I believe this bullshit.
I want to see what I believe.
I'm going to test.
All history, all studies of psychology show this is the most difficult time in most people's lives.
Right?
22 to 42.
So if you're in that range and you're listening, I love you.
Hang in there.
This is your ground.
If you keep growing, this is a great time.
All right?
Somewhere in that range, you make a transition.
Somewhere around 30, 35, 40.
You're 33, you just got engaged.
Congratulations, right?
You start to move towards a family.
You start to have those experiences.
I'm sure yours will be very successful.
Many aren't, right?
So at 42 or 43 to 63, that's the fall.
If you planted in the spring, right?
And you worked your tail off during that hot summer.
Right now, you can do more with your pinky than working around the clock.
You know more people, you have relationships, you recognize the patterns, you know what's going on.
Nothing's really a shock or surprise to you.
You're more strategic, you're more efficient, you're more elegant, you have more choices.
You've learned a lot of lessons if you grew.
Now, if you didn't plant in the spring and work hard in the summer, you're going to weep in the fall, not reap in the fall right.
So now this is your power period.
This is when most people earn the most money in their life if they're going to grow because they've accumulated knowledge skills, relationships and so forth.
And then the winter, as it comes back to that, 64 to 84 to 104 to the oldest humans, 124 years.
That period is a transition period to where you become a real leader, because you're no longer you know that 22 to 42.
You're trying to prove yourself to yourself or maybe other people, or both.
But there's a point when you get into your power group, you know who you are.
By the time you get into this last season, this you know 64 to 84 104, 124.
You know who the F you are.
I mean, and you want people to like what you do.
But if they don't, it's like you know who you are.
You don't give a shit.
I've just entered that season myself.
I'm about to be 66 in a few weeks.
And it's the most fulfilling season of all.
It's mind-boggling.
I wouldn't believe that when I was your age.
That's why I'm sharing it.
If you're healthy, if you're fit, if you're strong.
If you don't do that, then it can be a bitch that time.
But if you're healthy and strong, you have 40-year relationships, 35-year business relationships.
You have friends that adore you and love them.
It's unbreakable.
It's unshakable.
You have an intimate relationship or a family or husband and wife relationship.
If you've built to that point, that is strong, beyond anything you'd have dreamed or hoped for.
You wake up every day and you know that life is a gift and you want to give back even more.
Like you're more driven than you were when you were in the 22 to 42 stage.
Those are the seasons.
There's one more.
There's seasons of history.
And your season of history shapes how you shape your life.
So you can look at a thousand years of Roman history I'm very much in history and 500 years of Anglo-American history and you start to see patterns.
In fact, I'd recommend for everyone, there's a book called Generations.
Have you read it?
No.
When I was working with President Clinton.
In those days I worked with President Clinton.
I went across the other side and worked with the Speaker of the House, Gingrich.
On the same day, on Clinton's—on his desk, on the Reslo desk, was this book, Generations.
And I asked him about it.
And he told me about how it's amazing.
It shows how history is somewhat predictable and why the cycles are generated by different generations, how we react the way we grew up.
And then I go over to Gingrich's office, and he's the historian.
He's got it on his desk.
It's a pretty thick book, good-sized book.
My point is if you want to navigate your life, you need pattern recognition.
So you don't go into reaction.
And one thing is to understand seasons are a great pattern.
They freed us.
There are seasons of your life.
You should think about this season.
What's this season about for you?
What do you want to extract from this season?
And every season has predictable challenges and predictable opportunities.
And where am I in the season?
Some people go through their springtime during a war or wintertime.
Some people go through springtime in a fall.
We all grew up with different environments.
And so we're shaped by that, and that's why history has changed.
But let me finish the last piece.
I've gone way long.
I apologize.
I said there's three skills.
What do we need, right?
First one is pattern recognition.
The second one is pattern utilization.
So I watch you.
Like you, you and I both we developed companies, took them public very early ages, made a lot of money and figured out it wasn't just about money, right.
I'm going to look at your history.
You didn't just recognize patterns.
You used them.
You saw them in marketing areas.
You saw online opportunities.
You saw things.
You didn't just, oh, now I understand it.
You jumped on it.
Anyone who's incredibly successful in anything, if they're great at dance, if they're great at investing in companies, if they're great in running companies, if they're great in singing they recognize there are certain patterns.
And then the final skill and this is what I'm teaching my children is you ultimately want to become a pattern creator.
Take an example.
Say we learn to play the piano, right?
How do you learn to play the piano?
You got to recognize patterns and usually you're taught someone else's patterns that produce something beautiful, right?
Could be Bach, Beethoven, could be some rock, could be whatever you're learning.
And so you learn those patterns, and you practice them.
You learn to use them, right?
And now you can produce the same music.
There is a point, and I'm sure you've experienced this already and you're going to experience a lot more in the next 10 years of your life.
You've taken so much input in that You've recognized so many patterns that now you come through and you become the pattern creator.
And that's when you start to become the goat of your industry, the best of all time.
You look at, you know, Tom Brady's a friend of mine.
Like he made pattern distinctions no one else made on how to keep his body strong one of the most important ones, so he had the duration but also how to read the defense, know what's happening.
Those tools, he started to create his own patterns about how to deal with that, right?
And so, once you create your own patterns, you bring something your table has never been there before and you make something you've never been there before.
Your value goes through the roof.
When I met Jim Rohn, my original personal development teacher—
He changed my life radically.
I went when I was 17 years old.
He, oh yeah, that's a great picture.
That's great.
I love that man.
Beautiful man.
I went, what I did was I was working as a janitor. high school, sophomore year.
And I had.
My mom came home one day and said we've got a friend that needs somebody to help move stuff.
And I was always trying to earn some extra money.
And so, and it was the weekends.
I wasn't doing the janitorial work on the weekends.
So I said, okay, I'll do it, volunteer.
And my dad said, yeah, you ought to find out what he did.
He used to be such a loser.
Now he's so successful.
Right.
And so when I went to go see this guy, you know, I'm a hard worker.
So I worked really hard.
And so he took me to lunch and he starts asking me questions.
I said, I want to ask you questions.
I said, you know, my father said, used to be such a loser.
Now you're so successful.
How'd you change your life?
I'm just a kid.
I wasn't trying to be funny or mean, right?
The guy you'd said, your dad said, what?
He goes, well, it's true.
And he said, well, what changed my life is I went to a seminar.
He goes, yeah, it was, you know, three and a half hours.
Name is Jim Rohn.
He told me the whole thing.
And he's here in Orange County.
He's coming up to an event pretty quick.
I said, could you get me in?
And he goes, yeah.
I said, well, how much is it?
He said, $35.
It'd be like $250 in today's money, right?
And I said, $35?
I'm making $40 a week as a janitor.
I go, I said, I can't do that.
He goes, well, then just learn on your own experience and waste a few decades.
I said, you really think it's that valuable?
He goes, no, you have to decide if it's that valuable.
And so I remember I wrestled with this like it was the biggest decision of my life, a week's pay.
And I went in and I heard this man speak.
He said some simple things like, you know, for things to change, you got to change.
For things to get better, you got to get better, right?
Interesting things.
But at the end, I was so excited.
I went up to him and I said, I want to come work for you.
I want to learn this.
I want to be a part of this.
And he turned to me and said look kid, he goes.
You know, if you want to come work for me, you got to go through all my programs.
And I said, what does that mean?
And he said well, you got to this this this, you know it was like 1200 for just one of the programs for a weekend.
$1,200 is like $10,000 today to give you an idea, $12,000.
I'm, at the time, sleeping in my car, working as a janitor.
My dad left.
My mom kicked him out.
Mom's a strong woman.
And then she chased me out with a knife.
She wasn't going to kill me, but I wasn't going back in that place.
And so I'm like, I can't do this.
And then somebody said, you know, decide.
He goes, some people have to survive.
Some people succeed.
Decide which one you are.
And if...
If you're ready by next Saturday a week from Saturday he goes.
I'm starting a training and you can join it.
But if you don't have the money for it, you won't be able to do it.
And I remember leaving thinking, this guy just wants my money.
He's such a jerk.
And I was so angry.
But then in my head, I was like, he's right.
He's right.
And I've always gotten what I had to have.
I haven't had to have much.
And so I started going to banks.
I walked into this place, five banks turned down and I saw this woman who looked persuadable and sweet.
And her name was Mrs. Williams.
This woman looks at me and she goes, the bank's not gonna loan you this money.
And she's like my fifth bank.
And I said, you don't understand.
And I got all passionate.
She goes, with this kind of focus and energy, I think you can do something.
I'd like to give you something good.
And she goes, I want to talk to the bank, but if the bank won't lend me the money, I will.
If you look me in the eye and you swear to me I'm never going to have to come find you and you will take care of this.
And I jumped across, hugged her and kissed her.
She wasn't quite ready for that.
I went to Jim Rohn's seminar.
I went to work for him.
And the first question when I finally got a private moment with him that I asked was I had four fathers.
They were all good men.
They all worked hard.
How come we never had any money and sometimes no food?
I said, I look over at the school teacher who makes $35,000 a year, I think, in those days.
And then I see this hedge fund guy who made a billion dollars in a year.
I said, that is so unjust.
And he gave me a lesson that changed my whole life.
He said, Tony, he said, you're right.
We're all equal as souls. but we're not equal in the marketplace.
And so what does that mean?
He said, well, let me ask you a question.
Is it possible for someone to make twice as much money in the same amount of time?
Yeah, four times, 10 times, 100 times.
Yeah, people do it.
How?
He goes, you have to become more valuable.
He goes, if you go to work at McDonald's, you get this tiny little income.
It's not made to be an ideal job.
It's a first-time job.
Anyone can learn to do it in two hours.
And I've been obsessed about it ever since.
And that changed everything in my life.
My whole life became how do I add more value?
And so today I have 121 companies and we're doing 12 billion in business across almost every industry.
You can imagine that I'm a part of.
I couldn't run one company in the start and make it successful at $300,000 a year for the revenue.
All that became in every industry, and I have a lot of them.
I'm the number one in the industry.
It's because I'm obsessed with adding value.
And so I think that piece is what's missing also from our youth.
You're saying, what do they need new?
They think I'm here to get something.
No, life is calling you.
What are you going to give?
Not just what you want to give, but what people need.
And so my focus is I give people what they want.
They want to make more money.
They want a better relationship.
But my goal is so I can give them what they need, which is a life that has more meaning.
And that's one that goes beyond yourself.
It's going to be a stressful period.
Yes.
To say the least.
I think algorithms are actually making our online experiences more stressful.
100%.
Because you know they're designed to retain our attention, and the best way to retain our attention is probably fear.
And I think this with myself I find myself watching all these fucking short form videos that are just like they feel, like they're at some level, frying something, depleting something in me.
But it's designed the algorithms to serve me up, the next one that's going to hold me or scare me or whatever.
Yeah.
So in such a world, where the algorithms are probably going to, you know, in the online world, especially for younger kids, it's going to be better at taking hold of us.
What are the tools that I need to deal with this stress and this angst?
The first step to me would be take 15 minutes out of your day and go for micro learning. like decide you're going to learn what matters, right?
About yourself, about AI.
We tell people like you already have habits, right?
Most people are scrolling a good portion of the day.
Give me 15 of those minutes and let's do micro learning on something, a new language to stimulate your brain philosophy history AI, something pragmatic, something that's valuable.
It's just getting people to have some habits that, you know, the 1% growth metaphor, right?
You know, you know, 27 times at the end of the year.
It's like, it's pretty simple.
All we have to do is create a new direction.
If you try to do it one giant step, it's overwhelming for people.
The secret to life is chunking.
Think of it this way.
Some people never work out, but they eat easily.
So I'll say to them, why don't you work out?
And they'll give me all the reasons.
And I'll say, but you know, I'd have to join a gym.
I said, okay, well, tell me what's entailed.
And they'll go, I got to look up where the gyms are.
And then I got to drive to each of the gyms.
And then I got to park the car each place and find it.
And then I got to get out and hopefully get a pass.
And then they take you on the tour.
And then they want to sit you down and sell stuff to you.
And they got to back in the car and you got to drive things.
And then when you go do it, let's say you sign up, then you go and you got to check, check in and take off all your clothes.
And then they drop and get wrinkled.
And then you go work out and it's sweaty.
You got to wipe other people's sweat off.
And then afterwards you got to go do a shower and your hair is messed up or your makeup.
You got to start all over and everything else.
And then you got to get the thing and you got to back out.
It's like, it's too much work.
What does it eat?
Oh, you just go.
They chunk eating as one thing.
They chunk working out as 29,000 things, right?
So if you chunk too big, try to do everything in one bite.
It's overwhelming.
And if you chunk it too small, It's overwhelming.
So there's a different size for different things.
And if we want to learn and grow which is what the secret is to your future is to become a learning machine about what matters.
Like most people major in minor things.
They know more about some actresses or actors' love life than they do, or their skin regimen than they do, about their own values and needs and what makes them tick as a human being.
Today, you can learn from the brightest, smartest people on earth.
They're available.
They're available online.
They're available by contracting or coaching.
They're everywhere.
There isn't a limit anymore.
There's zero limit except you're deciding to be a creator and not a maintainer.
So you're deciding I'm not just going to manage my life.
I'm going to design and create something because the tools are available everywhere.
And so I'm just one of those.
I have a couple of questions based on what you've just said.
The first one, starting at the top, was around.
You talked about the side of pattern recognition, utilization and creation.
The question I had from that section was, is there a way to get better at pattern recognition?
Yeah.
First, by understanding it's the most important key.
Okay.
So it's like, if I'm fearful, what's the pattern I'm missing here?
What's something that could give me some history to understand that this isn't random?
Like, you know, people say, I overeat, I overdrink, I get really angry at others.
You don't overeat every moment.
You don't smoke every moment.
What are the triggers that you use?
And do you recommend people write?
How do they raise their self-awareness enough to start spotting these patterns?
I believe in diaries.
You call it diary, I call it journals.
I believe in journals to be able to do that, to guide yourself.
But yes, but it's more than that.
You have to...
You have to not only make the distinction, but you also have to have a different state to it.
For example, let's say I say to you, I know, I know.
I need to lose weight.
I'm going to do it.
I'm going to go on a diet.
I'm going to work out.
Am I going to do it?
No.
No.
Because I'm not in the state to do it.
Now, most people are trying to figure out what to do.
And there's nothing wrong with that, but it's the wrong sequence.
Because when you think about what to do, if you've never done it before, you feel uncertain.
You don't follow through.
If you have done it before, but you don't feel strong enough, you're not going to follow through.
So I tell people, if you want a breakthrough, it's three things.
Strategy, story, state.
Most people, if they want to have a breakthrough, they want to change their body.
They want to change their life.
They look for how to do it.
And that's natural, but it's the absolute wrong order.
And if you do things with the wrong order, it's like having the numbers to a phone for someone and you dial the wrong order.
You don't reach somebody.
Or the vault, right?
You've got the right numbers, wrong order, vault doesn't open.
Why are so many people overweight in this country?
Like 60% of the population is overweight.
How is that possible?
Is it because what it takes to be fit and strong is so incredibly complex?
No, only the 1% knows.
No, it's super expensive.
No, you have to work not to know what to do.
So the how is not the problem.
So I say strategy, story, state.
That's how you have a breakthrough.
Yes, I'm a strategist.
The right strategy can save you 10 years.
I love that.
It's fun.
But if I start with a strategy, you'll listen and go, yeah, that's cool.
And you won't do it.
The real problem is the story you have.
The story you have is I've tried everything.
The story you have, nothing works.
The story has all the good ones are gone and I'm gay and they're not or they're gay and I'm not.
It's the story, is the belief you've told yourself over and over, because belief is the invisible force that controls everything in your life.
And when you have a belief that you've honed because you're fearful and you've never done this before, then I can show you exactly how to do it and you'll say it doesn't work.
I've tried that.
Yeah.
How many times?
How hard?
How many minutes?
Right?
Right.
But what's behind the story is your state, your mental, emotional state.
If I said to you, I am going to lose 12 pounds in the next six weeks, that is non-negotiable.
Here's why I'm going to do this and this and this and this.
Do you think I'm going to do it?
Yes.
Bet your ass I'm going to do it.
Right.
You can feel the state.
Yeah.
So people are usually trying to figure out how to do something.
And they got a story about it when what they need first is the state.
When you go in the right state.
How many of this happened, where you get in the flow and something comes to you.
You're hitting a tennis ball or you're doing, or you're speaking.
And at the end of you're like, that was pretty awesome.
I did that.
How did I do it?
I don't know.
That's just flow.
That was pretty awesome.
Right.
You're in a peak state.
I put people in a peak state while they're doing the things we're talking about.
So what do you do right before you come out on stage?
And what can anyone listening at home do before the big meeting, the big moment in their life, or really like on a daily basis to configure our state?
The first thing I do in my little daily routine is I use the jacuzzi for a moment to open my body up and everything else.
And then I go on the cold plunge.
And I've been doing that for 18 years.
Now everybody talks about it.
But I go in that cold plunge.
And the secret, though, is I don't negotiate with myself.
I go in the cold plunge for both the health purposes because it floods your body, right, completely.
But the real value is the mental discipline of I don't go, okay, I'm ready.
And I don't get in one and just lie in here.
I dunk under.
I jump in.
I've got one that goes above my head.
I go under the water.
I dive into it, right?
And I don't stand there.
I don't stand there and go, oh, I feel cold right now or wait a minute.
Like I've trained my brain.
When I say go, we go.
And I've done that for decades.
And so I'm not in the place when I say go somewhere else, my brain obeys.
I don't have these stories in my head, back and forth, trying to have a conversation with myself, to try to convince myself to do something.
I've decided.
Right?
So decision point is everything.
So I've trained myself to do it.
But also it produces a massive change.
It is not comfortable.
I don't think there's been a morning in my life that I've looked forward to doing it.
But it changes you.
So that's one thing.
The thing I do before I go on stage, I have a routine of how I shift my body.
I have a prayer that I do, which is use me, Lord.
And I picture being to serve as many human beings as possible.
I see them not only where they are now, I see where they're going to be by the end of what I'm done.
And then I make this rattle shift in my body.
I make these moves and explosive breath.
And then I storm out there.
And then I've taken myself, imagine, on a 0 to 10 to a 20 of intensity.
So now I can drop down to a 9.
Feels like I'm very relaxed.
But I've got a lot more gears in me than you know.
And that's how I can project to the guy at the top of the stadium and hold him for 12 hours.
You know, who wouldn't sit for a three-hour movie someone spent $300 million on?
And do you think a lot about your diet and nutrition?
Yeah, I'm totally committed to that.
And I also train like a crazy person.
And I do hyperbaric oxygen.
You name it.
I'm a biohacker.
And I'm committed.
I have a whole company that does it for people as well.
So I've always done that because I've had to, to perform.
And I'm 66 going to produce results that, you know, were designed by a 25 year old.
Right.
But I'm stronger today than I was then.
I got more aerobic capacity.
I've got more muscle capacity.
So, I mean, there's a limit, but I haven't found it yet.
If you follow me, you've probably heard me talk about hiring more so than anything else.
You've probably seen me on Behind the Diary, which is our other YouTube channel, talking about how obsessed I am with the hiring process.
And this really brings me to a recommendation I'd love to give you, which is to check out our sponsor LinkedIn, if you're having hiring difficulties.
Their new AI assistant filters out applications for you based on the criteria you've set for that specific job, surfacing only the best matches.
That way, you're not left having to hunt through a mountain of different resumes.
It'll recommend 25 candidates daily who fit what you're looking for, that you can then invite to apply for the role.
LinkedIn is where we go to find the long-term A players that I have in my team.
In fact, employees hired through LinkedIn are 30 more likely to stick around for at least a year compared to those hired through other job networks.
Hire right the first time by posting your job for free at linkedin.com slash DOAC.
Then use the promotion feature to access LinkedIn Jobs new AI assistant.
That's linkedin.com slash DOAC.
Terms and conditions apply.
In a world of challenging meaning, where a lot of my viewers are struggling with meaning.
One of the things I've noticed is that it appears, especially with young men, who you talked about earlier, it appears that more and more of them are turning to religion.
And you mentioned your faith in God there.
It's a really interesting phenomenon for me that I've observed in my own life.
I've talked about this a few times.
Certain friends of mine who were very individualistic.
They were living the dream in any way that you might define it.
You know, They had money, they had freedom, they had no boss, no dependents, no partner.
And suddenly you see their life turn into what looks like depression, a form of depression, an absence of meaning in their lives.
And I wanted just to throw this out there, because we are in a society that's, I think, increasingly encouraging independence right.
And there's upsides to independence, of course.
We all understand those.
But I wondered if there's sort of a double-edged sword here.
You kind of said it earlier about making the world more about just me me, me and I.
And in a world of abundance, I imagine many more people are going to choose to make it about I I I I I, Because they can.
I could put a headset on, theoretically, never leave my house.
A robot puts the food in my mouth.
I could have some sex robot that just gets me off.
Yeah. money comes in my account by UBI.
The reason your friends got depressed, I've had this happen.
I've seen this as well.
I've had, you know, most of my friends are older than I am.
Usually, for some reason, I gravitated to men that were 18, 20 years my senior, who brilliant, and learning from them and seeing where they're going in their life, and so forth.
But I watched some of them like sell their company and make a billion too.
And then they were happy for like a month maybe.
And they'd call me, let's go to this, go do that.
And I'm going to try to go to them some.
But I got, You know, I got a lot of companies, got a lot of kids.
I got a lot of things.
Right.
And it's like and eventually they all want to get back in the game because we have six human needs.
Certainty.
Uncertainty.
Because think about this.
If you were certain every moment of your life, you know what someone's going to say.
And I'm sure you've had this somewhat.
You know what they're going to say before they're going to say it.
But if you knew what someone's going to say before they're going to say, you know what's going to happen before it's going to happen every moment of every day, in the beginning, it would be cool.
But after a while, what would you feel?
Bored.
Out of your mind bored.
So God, in her infinite wisdom, gave us uncertainty.
We need variety.
We need surprise.
So I ask people, you're going to stay in 15,000 people, and I say, how many of you love surprises?
And everybody raises their hand, yay.
And I go, bullshit.
You love the surprises you want.
The surprise you don't want, you call problems, but we need those too, right?
Third need is significance.
They need to feel unique.
You need to feel special.
They need to feel important.
Who do you think has that need?
All of us.
Everyone.
Yeah.
Now, some people, like Donald Trump, it's pretty obvious, right?
And some people, though, it's like, I don't want significance.
I don't want to be special.
That's only because they feel if they get special, they'll get attacked.
Some people do it by earrings.
Some people buy tattoos in certain areas.
Some buy knowing box scores about a sport more than anybody else.
Some people buy their art.
Some people buy the way they dress.
Some people buy their money.
Some people buy more generous.
Everyone finds a way, okay?
However, some people do it through violence, okay?
So let me give you another seed.
Why has violence always been with us?
If I feel I'm insignificant—
And this is, by the way, even more powerful in most men's cases, because the nature of testosterone right.
Testosterone is about significance.
It's about being dominant, right?
So if I'm in a community and I'm driving by or I'm walking by this community and it's a tough community, a tough environment somebody comes up, puts a gun to my head.
I've never met him in my life.
Why?
Well, first of all, how certain do you think that person is you're going to respond when they put a gun to your head?
Before, you may not have paid attention to them, but you're going to pay attention now.
How significant are they in your life on a zero to 10 scale with that gun to your head?
They're the most significant thing on earth.
And by the way, every time it's a little different, they give variety.
Anytime you meet a belief, an emotion or a behavior meets at least three of these six needs, you will become addicted to that thought, that feeling or that behavior.
It could be a positive one or a negative one, but you will become addicted to it.
So violence connects to those three.
But you can also get significance by tearing other people down.
So why do we have so many warriors in their little house, you know, doing their little virtual signaling, doing what they're doing?
Because they've never done anything with their life.
And it used to be I'd have to confront you.
Now I don't confront you.
I don't even know who I am.
I can say all this terrible shit and I'm sitting in my place and make my seal feel significant because I make you smaller.
I'm bigger.
It's why social media is so terrible.
There's great things.
Social media is what's so terrible about it.
It's like people now can meet their need for significance without much effort.
No consequence.
You come and say this directly to me, you're going to pay a price of some sort, right?
That's no longer there.
Now, fourth need, connection and love.
Everybody wants love.
Most people settle for connection because they've had love at one point.
It was so painful when it ended, they decided to settle for connection.
How can you get it?
You can get it by going for a run and feeling connected to God, to the universe, nature.
You can get it by prayer.
You can get it by being with some friends.
You can get it by making love.
You can get it by getting a dog.
If nothing else, get a dog.
Don't get a cat.
Cats leave.
But, you know, dogs, you leave for two minutes.
It's like you've been gone for six months.
They'll make you feel very loved.
There's a million ways to feel connection and love.
Some are positive.
Some are negative.
Some people get connected by their problems.
They're always comparing problems.
You ever seen two people comparing, but I have this.
Well, you think that's bad.
Let me tell you mine.
They're arguing over significance and they're connecting through their problems, right?
So the biggest drug on earth is not cocaine.
It's not fentanyl.
It's not dope.
It's problems.
Because the deepest fear everybody has is they're not enough.
And our deeper fear is if we're not enough, we won't be loved.
I've never met a human being.
I've worked with kings, queens. winners of everything you can imagine, Academy Awards, scientists.
There's some point in which you might feel, for someone you care about most, that you're not smart enough, young enough old enough, pretty enough, funny enough, rich enough, playful enough something enough.
And it is the worst feeling on earth.
To feel like you are unloved and worthless is internal death.
So people come up with a story.
It's just because I have, you know, I have this dyslexia.
That's why.
Or it's because I was raped and maybe they really were raped.
I'd like to kill the guy that hurt them.
But that's not why they're feeling what they're feeling right now.
It's because they're fearful.
And so if you have a big problem, that's why I'm not where I want to be.
It's not that I'm not enough.
I'm not worthy of love.
And so people use problems the way to connect.
Now, these first four needs, certainty, uncertainty.
You can see how they'd have a conflict.
But have you ever rented a movie you've already watched?
Yeah.
Get a life.
I have two.
Why would we do that?
Because we're certain it's good, but it's been long enough that we hope there's a variety.
We won't remember it all.
I'll have a variety once again.
So you can meet multiple needs through the same task potentially.
But certainty, uncertainty, significance, here you are in Hollywood.
Why do people come to Hollywood?
Be famous.
Be famous, right?
They don't know what that really is.
If they did, some of them would move away from it.
But significance is what they're looking for.
But what they really want is love.
That's what everybody wants.
But you know what the problem is?
They think if they're significant, everyone's going to love them.
And I get these clients without mentioning any names the biggest names in Hollywood, the biggest names in sports.
And you know what their number one thing is?
They're angry.
Why are they angry?
Because they thought if I'm significant, everybody loved me.
And now they go, people rip me online.
They interrupt me with my family trying to have dinner.
They don't give a shit about me.
They just want a picture.
They just want this.
And if I don't do it, they write that about me.
They care about themselves.
They care about themselves.
And so what happened is I thought by being significant, I would be loved.
And now I'm super significant and I'm not loved.
I'm attacked.
Because the more you try and push your significance on someone, the less significant they make you.
If you love someone, there's nothing more significant than that.
True love, not a trade, not I'll love you if you give me something.
Genuine love.
And if that happens, you become significant in people's lives.
But that's the number one challenge in this community.
So significance, love, have a tack.
If you're significant, you're the individual.
But I need to be connected.
Well, if I'm so connected, who am I?
And that's the pull.
The secret to it all are the final two needs.
These are the spiritual needs, not religious, but spiritual.
And that is we all must grow.
When you grow, you feel alive.
And if you don't grow, you start to die inside.
And this isn't my rule.
Everything in the universe grows or dies, as you well know.
This is the law of the universe.
If your relationship's not growing, it's dying.
Don't bullshit yourself.
If your business is not growing, you're a businessman, you know.
It is not growing.
It is dying.
You better do something now, right?
But we grow so we have something finally to give, which is where meaning comes in life.
When I grow, I have something more to give.
And if I can give that to someone, then my life is more meaningful than just the pleasure of I have the machine that you know makes me feel pleasure in certain parts of my body and feeds me and all the things you talked about.
If you went to Vegas and you pull down that you know that little jukebox thing and you get boom boom boom bars bars, bars.
What's your reaction?
Amazing.
Amazing.
And you pull it a second time and you get it again.
Amazing.
And you do it a third time and you get it again.
That's amazing.
And now you do it a hundred times.
Yeah, that's amazing.
And now what you have is a job.
You do this and you've got a predictable outcome.
The fact that you don't know what the outcome is, that's the jackpot in it.
They get someone hooked on anything.
That's what makes it significant because it's scarce.
Right?
So, when you do this, if I said to you Osama bin Laden, what would you say is top need driving force.
Was it certainty?
Was it variety?
Was it significance?
Was it love?
Was it growth or contribution?
I'd say probably significance.
100%.
He was one of, I forgot the number, 27 children.
Literally, he was 27 children.
He was a nobody.
He took his dad's money.
He was not very religious.
And he went to Afghanistan and he used his money and became significant.
Not by shooting people.
He provided resources.
And then all of a sudden his entire life changed.
How do you know?
The most significant thing is he sent other people to die.
He didn't go to die.
He sent other people.
Now, his number one drive of significance and his way of doing it was to get other people to die.
On that same day in 9-11...
There are men and women in the fire department, police department who entered those buildings knowing a good chance they would die to save a stranger.
Also driven by significance, but with different rules.
If I die a hero, my life is meaningful.
And that's a meaningful life.
So people can even have the same need structure, but their beliefs about how to meet those needs are the most important thing.
And the needs of connection and love, growth and contribution have no downside.
Certainty make.
If you have certainty as your number one thing, you're always trying to keep life the same way and you're going to be stressed out especially with AI you're going to be really stressed out.
If you're a variety person, you can have a lot of fun, but eventually not much variety.
The life you described for all these people.
Now, they have the money, they have the sex, they have this, they have that, they have the woman, they have the notoriety, they have the Academy Award.
It all gets old, right?
Because if we're not growing, it doesn't matter.
How many people do you know that were famous, who were rich, who had supposedly everything people want and took their own life?
Why did they take their life?
They stopped growing and stopped having a sense of meaning by giving.
I can show you example after example of people.
So these need structures in the new world have to be met.
We can meet certainty right now very easily by going online and controlling our communication.
That's why people text.
That's much easier than communicating back and forth with someone, right?
We can get variety by going online so easily now.
We can get significance, tear other people down or work on something significant, we think, right?
AI, explore the world.
We can get a sense of connection through people online or through a robot.
Or these days, people have an AI and they talk to it like it's their boyfriend or girlfriend, because it totally affirms them.
They say something idiotic and they tell you, you're so smart, right?
You're better, right?
But you're missing growing and contributing.
If you're missing growing and contributing, you will not feel fulfilled anymore.
You as a person.
If I've read your books correctly and I didn't read them all, but I've had pieces of it probably the best lesson you got early in life was there's the science of achievement and there's the art of fulfillment.
They're two different skills.
If you want to extraordinary life, you need both.
You go to the East, they're really great about fulfillment.
They can live in poverty and feel totally happy and connected to God or the universe.
You come here and people can have an incredible external life, but their internal life often not so nice.
They get really pissed off because they didn't get their special sauce on their burger, right?
It's a different world.
I believe you can merge those two.
How?
You master the science of achievement.
There are rules to achieve, as you well know.
You wrote an old book with 33 rules in it.
Me too.
Right.
So I know those rules.
I know books on finance, three of them.
I want an answer.
Is it still possible to win the financial game?
Because so many young people think it can't be done.
So I interviewed 50 of the greatest financial people alive today.
All started with nothing.
All billionaires, nobody from the Lucky Sperm Club.
They all did it on their own.
Ray Dalio, Carl Icahn, Warren Buffett, all of them.
And guess what I found?
They're all different, but I'm a modeler.
I found the strategies that are common between them and I applied them.
I taught other people, wrote the books, but I applied them myself.
And that's how my businesses and my life grew geometrically.
I modeled.
I didn't have to learn on my own experience.
You follow?
I've got to ask you some questions on those two points.
So on these six needs, because I also want to ask you about the 50 rich people that you've interviewed for the books.
But on those six needs, when you look at someone like me and you look at the broad world that I'm heading towards as a 30-year-old man, what configuration of these needs?
Well, I'll tell you what creates all the pain first.
Okay, please.
So if I go to a room and I'll say, I explain these needs like I have.
I know this is kind of lecture here.
I didn't mean to be that, but I just want to share because I'm so passionate about it.
And I'll get people to understand what they are.
And then I ask them I want you to write down what you think your top two needs have been, not in what you want, but in the way you've been living.
Because people might want love, but they think they have to be significant before they can get it.
Or they might want love, but they want certainty that love will never go away.
You follow me?
And so that modifies things.
And I'll say, so the way you've lived, the way you've lived, what have been the top two?
And then I say I want you to write a paragraph about what's the downside of having that one so high on your list.
And it's amazing.
So then I say now write what you think.
Your list top two should be to go to the next level of your life.
Okay.
Let's have you do that.
What do you think your top two needs?
I see you doing an array, which I love.
I love how active you are.
So what would you say your top two have been up until now?
I think if I'm being completely honest.
Yes.
And, by the way, I want to thank you because I watched several of your pieces and you are you're not bullshitting about it.
There's just no, I'm going to die someday.
So there's no, even if being honest makes me look bad, it's like, who cares?
My, of course, like significance, of course.
Yes.
Especially from where I you know where i came from.
Yeah, that was the big problem was you know, being different and not in a good way, that's right.
And then i would say um interestingly, it feels like uncertainty and significance are really really high for me because yes yes i've, for some reason, i have a very, a huge appetite for uncertainty.
Yeah, you're wired that way, in a beautiful way.
It also leads to learning for you.
That's one of your vehicles for learning, is it not?
Yeah, dropping out of school, stopping going to school when I was younger, dropping out of university, quitting jobs where I shouldn't have quit them after a month?
Which, by the way, if certainty was your top need, would you have done that?
No.
No, completely.
So you understand, I'm talking about the six controlling forces of your life.
There's a million stories about your life, but there's only six reasons you do anything.
You have all these stories with reasons.
So what would you say would be the downside of that?
By the way, there have been upsides, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Great, yeah.
We're sitting here because of the upsides.
Your desire for significance made you look for significant ideas, significant application, succeed in business.
Oh, the downsides of wanting significance is— At the top.
Because it's valuable.
Significance is valuable, period.
Everyone should want it.
But it's the sequence.
So if it's the top of your list, what's the downside?
For me, it costs me connection and love and some of these other opportunities.
That's correct.
That's correct.
Which is what you really want underneath it all.
Yeah.
Your desire for significance really came from the fact that you were not loved and connected by people.
People judge you because of your skin.
They put you in a community where you were different.
You were outside the... So it's like, I'll show them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right?
Which, by the way, was a very healthy response.
Right?
But now, this stage of your life...
This is the gift that you have now at this stage of your life, right?
You're entering this second season, right?
Now you don't have to be driven by that anymore.
You already are significant.
What more are you going to do that's not significant?
I'm sure you'll find more significant things to do, but you've done so many significant things.
You've helped millions of people, I'm sure, through your insights, your elements.
You've written books.
You've built businesses.
And you're only 33 years old.
That's pretty fantastic.
F and awesome, right?
So now you get the leisure of being able to sit back and say now, with a greater level of consciousness, what would ideally be my top two.
What would you say?
Your top two need to be to have the next level of your life, to go to the next level.
For you,
It was really easy for me to answer this question.
Connection and love and the need to grow and give.
Yes, yes.
Yeah, well, those are two different ones.
Contribution, growth, and contribution.
Of those two, which one do you think is even more important for you?
Oh, God, of those two?
Yeah.
It's hard because one you can see as a vehicle to the other.
Yeah, exactly.
I understand that, but I'm asking a different question.
I'm saying which is more important to feel, experience?
It would be contribution.
Yes.
So for you, you're saying love and contribution?
I'm saying love and contribution.
In what order?
Love first and then contribution.
It's a good choice.
In my head, I tried the other way around, and I thought, no.
It's almost like monks have said to me many years ago that you need to fill up your cup so you have something to pour out for others.
And that's what I was thinking of.
I was thinking it doesn't work the other way around.
That was a wise choice.
Most people wouldn't make that choice.
I, for most of my life, was contribution first and then love.
It was my way of earning love.
And so, like I'd be on stage for 13 hours and this is before people had phones and everybody wants to sign something and give me a hug.
I work my guts out and then that was my take it in time.
So I'd be there, finish at 130 or 2 in the morning and I'd be there till 330 till.
Every person had an autograph, got their hug and everything else.
Now it's pictures a lot faster, but that was my life.
I met my wife, Sage, changed my entire life.
She didn't care that I was Tony Robbins.
She just loved me.
And all of a sudden, I never thought 12,000, 15,000, 20,000 people of love pouring out.
You could compare it.
One person could compare.
But way beyond that.
So now I finish it.
And when I give my guts, I go to one in the morning.
But then I get up and I leave.
I take pictures in the middle of the day.
But then I leave at that time.
I go and be with my wife.
And it switched where love was there.
Because think about this.
If contribution is first, and this is what a lot of people do.
Then it's a way to protect yourself from feeling rejected, because if I'm always giving to you truly generously, over beyond what you can imagine, and then you treat me like shit, well then you're clearly the problem, right.
I don't have to think I'm not enough.
But the more honest way is love, because if it's love first, now I'm giving because I want to, not because I have to.
Does that make sense?
So tell me how you think that would change your life if you made love and contribution your top two, and the way you actually live.
Because you already value love and contribution.
But if they were the highest priority, how would it shift your life for the better in your mind?
I feel like I would be significantly less stressed.
You are correct here.
You are absolutely correct.
So when I ask the audience this, I have them write down and I've got 15000 people and I'll say okay, how many have certainty on your list?
And they've come to an event that has a firewalk, right?
And you get like 50, 60% of the rooms on the top in their top two of their list.
Right.
Because it's in our culture.
It's still the most important one.
It's the foundational.
It's the one that's going to have the biggest problem with AI, because they want things to stay the same.
And life isn't.
The only thing that's for certain is change.
And now rapid change, like geometrically rapid change.
OK.
Variety, small number, significance through the roof.
Social media has made significance disproportionate in our culture.
And that's why people are so unhappy.
You used to maybe compare most yourself to your neighbors or your friends.
Now you compare yourself to a billionaires of which there's only 3000.
Right.
And so you're like, my life's not that great anymore.
Or you compare it to pictures that have been doctored.
A friend of mine owns a gym and he says, so you can't believe it.
Women and men come in here who are influencers.
They lay everything out and then they do their video and they never work out.
They're 27 years old.
They don't have to work out for shit.
I mean, it's like they do a minimum workout.
They got jeans.
They're just fine.
They don't even do the workout.
It's all pictures.
It's all bullshit, right?
You know he goes.
It makes me so mad because you know real people.
They're working hard to make something happen.
So that's why people get so women especially depressed comparing themselves to images that are not even real, right.
It's totally absurd.
So when I do it with the audience, though, certainty and significance is 80% of the room.
Right.
There's growth people, contribution people.
But that's the dominant force, because of our cultural conditioning and because certainty is basically a survival tool.
Then I've asked them to do what you did.
And I say, OK, tell me.
I don't tell them anything like I didn't tell you anything.
And then I say, OK, who has certainty on their list now?
And in a room of 15,000 people, 12,000 people, there might be like five.
OK, there's five people that really don't like pain.
So I point that out to them and they look at me.
And then I go, okay, how many got variety?
It'll be more variety.
How many got significance?
The number plummets, just like it did with you.
People, I didn't tell them anything.
Their own intelligence knows this, right?
How many got love?
Through the roof, right?
Contribution through the roof.
Growth through the roof.
Those are the ones that expand.
And then we show people how to condition that, though, because it's one thing to know it.
It's another thing to start training it in your body to make those priorities happen in your life right.
Just like any other habit, working out or anything else.
You have to build the neurology of that.
You have to practice putting yourself in those states over and over again where you make the value based on love or you make the value based on contribution.
See, before, you do something to be significant and you miss out on some of the love.
Now, love is probably always what you wanted.
That's why you can make that decision so quickly.
Right.
But now I'm going to go for that first, not this circuitous route.
By the way, you will still be significant.
You'll be loving first and you'll be contributing and that will make you significant.
Is it really possible to change like that deeply?
No, not at all.
I've never been able to do that in my 49th year.
I'm just, I've never seen that happen.
No, I was thinking really, really deeply about what you were saying.
And I was thinking there will be some people that are listening.
And I think there was maybe a part of me, my conscience, that's like Because that's a journey I've never gone on before.
I've never shifted from the... Well, you're not going to do it by discussion.
You have to have leverage.
What is that?
Leverage is you have to have something you value more than your present way of doing things.
Leverage can be pain or pleasure, right?
Like my fiancée.
Yeah, your fiancée.
I understand how you got to L.A.
A little leverage, right?
Her love, her happiness, her joy.
Oh, that's beautiful.
That's my girl.
You and Sage.
That's awesome.
You're good at putting people's state with their pictures.
That's impressive.
It's a beautiful photo.
Yeah, I love her so much.
We've been together 25 years.
I love her more today than ever before.
She is a force in nature, this woman.
Really, really great.
But yes, she's leverage in my life.
My youngest daughter's massive leverage.
She's four and a half years old.
It's beautiful.
But I'll give you an example.
I worked with a woman one time on stage and She was a colon therapist and vegan.
But she was always sick because she's so stressed all the time trying to be perfect at everything.
There's a constriction in her body, right?
And the level of stress was just ridiculous, right?
So I was trying to get her to see have some other options about what to do, without boring me the whole story.
I'm looking for leverage always.
That's how you get someone to make a change.
You got to make change a must, not a should.
Not me making it to you.
If I put a gun to your head, that's leverage.
But some people would rather die than bend to your will.
You have to find out what moves that person.
It's unique for everyone.
Not what motivates them.
I hate the word motivation.
I've never used it.
I want to know your drives.
Look, if you're fat, you're motivated to eat.
I want to know what's underneath.
I want to know what the drives are.
So this woman, I'm trying to help her make changes and I show her these things and see the consequences, and she wouldn't change, wouldn't change.
So finally I said, man, I got to push this lady.
It's like I said How long I wouldn't tell her this.
I asked, I said how long would a person with a level of stress with these things you're doing and these ailments, how long will a person like that live if they don't change?
And she paused and she thought and she said, probably to 35.
How old are you?
32.
Okay, she's going to change now.
I mean, she's going to do it, right?
That's the leverage.
She's got to change.
But I can't change.
I just can't.
It's just how my life is.
I said, well, I said, this session is on videotape, you know?
And I said how do you think your daughter's going to feel when she's carrying your coffin?
And she knows that you knew you could shift this and you didn't.
This is pretty intense.
I mean, she thinks she's going to die.
If she doesn't do it, she probably could.
So I'm picking up big leverage, right?
She goes, I know that's horrible, but I can't change.
And part of my head, I'm like, holy shit, she's not going to change hair.
What the hell is going to change her?
And then I said to her, I said, yeah, what if her new mother is a meat eater?
And she exploded on stage.
That is not happening.
I will not make this happen.
I mean, she went berserk.
And she goes, fine, I'm changing this now.
Like there is always leverage.
There is something that will make change a must and not a should.
Change is never a matter of ability.
It's always a matter of strong enough reasons, of motive.
If you've got strong enough reasons, you can do just about anything.
But if you have weak reasons, you're not going to do anything.
So the fact that you understand this is our discussion.
In an event, you'd be in a rather peak state and I'd take you through a process of consequence where you will envision what the consequences are and then you can make that shift.
And you've still got to condition it.
This specific change is the hardest one.
I think a lot of people might say I was thinking forward of life events to come and becoming a father.
Yes, that will do that.
It will absolutely shift a lot of people.
Becoming a father, getting married, falling in love.
There are certain events.
Losing people will make you reevaluate things.
Hitting a birthday, you know, you're 33.
When you hit your 40th birthday, I'm sure you don't think it will be any different.
I remember people telling me that.
But you tend to reevaluate. for some weird reason in our culture.
And after 40, usually a five-year or a 50-year or 60-year.
It's just part of the way we look at life.
There's a process you go through and there'll be different things that trigger you.
But when you want a real lasting change, you have to change the driving force.
When we change these, it's changing your values.
So again, like think about how your brain is a predictor and it's trying to close the gap between what it's predicting and what reality is.
When it's not working, it looks for an answer.
When you get to the point where your old strategy doesn't work enough and you have enough pain, you will search for something new.
And if at that time we can give you something that actually works, you'll grab it.
It's like if you're drowning in a sea of confusion and I throw your life raft, you're not going to go.
I don't like the color.
You're going to grab a hold and it comes into your unconscious.
And the last thing I'd say about that is it's also about going beyond your conscious mind.
If you ever try to do something and then sabotage yourself, it's just consciously.
You wanted one thing, subconsciously another.
I believe all lasting change happens in an altered state.
When I say an altered state, you could call it hypnosis.
I tell people I'm a de-hypnotist.
Most people walk around in hypnosis.
People tell me, like, you can't hypnotize me, and they're in a hypnotized state in that moment.
Did you ever drive your car?
And then something catches your attention and you stay focused on it too long.
And all of a sudden you realize, holy shit, who's been driving the car?
That was a hypnosis state.
Hypnosis just means you're inside, not outside most of the time.
And in a hypnotic state, what goes in, goes in deeper than just a consciousness state.
That's why I like doing storytelling.
And I'm I'm, my wife and I are.
There's certain things in life that just shouldn't happen, that are inhuman, and trafficking is one of them.
And we had a friend whose child was taken and trafficked.
It was the most brutal thing.
And so I got us involved.
And so now we've contributed to 72,000 children being saved.
I've gone out on some of these undercover with scars on my face and elements.
It's the most brutal thing you can possibly imagine.
But I tell you this because when you witness certain things in life that are so intense—
They alter you.
They change you.
They change what you value.
They change what you make important in your life.
And so what I say to people, you want your life to keep growing?
Keep putting yourself in new environments.
Keep getting around things you're not used to and let something hit you.
People don't know their passions because they keep going and doing the same things.
It's like get around where it's better and see what hits you.
And something's going to strike you.
Something's going to wake you up.
Something is going to make you feel more desire, more want to give something to life as opposed to just live your life.
Because the life you describe to those people is predictable.
You get familiarized, even pain.
I mean you look at people in Auschwitz.
You know Man's Search for Meaning is one of my favorite books.
Have you read it?
Victor Franklin.
Yeah, and I bought the rights.
I'm making the movie, right?
Oh, really?
The reason I was telling you about finding the kids is I made The Sound of Freedom.
Did you see it?
Yes, incredible.
And we beat Disney that week, and people thought that would never happen, right?
But that movie changed people radically, woke them up, brought resources to the table.
Has created real shift.
Man searched the meaning, I think, can do that as well.
But in those places, they get habituated to the pain.
You get habituated to pain or pleasure.
That's why we've got to grow.
And when we grow we get that life cycle.
We feel more alive, and then we got something to share, and then we feel meaning and it's like a virtuous cycle and life gets better and better.
Last month, I told you about our sponsor, Function Health, and their team, who've developed a way of giving you a full 360 view of what's going on inside your body.
They offer over 100 advanced lab tests covering everything from hormones toxins inflammation, heart health, stress and so much more.
So Jack, who started this show with me, got his first blood draw done a couple of weeks ago.
So I thought I'd let him tell you a little bit more about his experience.
This test really opened my eyes to personally what I should be doing with my health.
I hear a lot of information in this podcast.
I sit in every single recording.
So to know how I can relate each one to me personally is super valuable.
You sign up and you schedule your tests.
And once you're done, you get a little report like the one I have here.
I can see my in-range results, my out-of-range results.
And there's a little AI function too.
So if I have any questions about my out-of-range results...
I can just go in there and ask it any question I want.
And these tests are backed by doctors and thousands of hours of research.
You get an annual draw done and a mid-year follow-up.
So if you want to learn more, head over to functionhealthcom slash DOAC, where you can sign up for 365 a year.
I'll put the link in the description below.
It is just $1 a day for your health.
You know, every once in a while you come across a product that has such a huge impact on your life that you'd probably describe it as a game changer.
And I would say for about 35 to 40 of my team, they would currently describe this product that I have in front of me called Ketone IQ, which you can get at ketonecom, as a game changer.
But the reason I became a co-owner of this company and the reason why they now are a sponsor of this podcast is is because one day, when I came to work, there was a box of this stuff sat on my desk.
I had no idea what it was.
Lily in my team says that this company have been in touch.
So I went upstairs, tried it, and quite frankly, the rest is history.
In terms of my focus, my energy levels, how I feel, how I work, how productive I am, game changer.
So if you want to give it a try, visit ketone.com slash steven for 30% off.
You'll also get a free gift with your second shipment.
And now you can find Ketone IQ at Target stores across the United States, where your first shot is completely free of charge.
I was stunned at how big your business empire is.
You know, even as you're speaking there you're talking about movies that I've watched that I had no idea that you're involved in.
And you're talking about all these other incredible things you've done.
And yeah, your company's doing, what, $12 billion in revenue annually?
Well, it's a group of companies.
Group of companies, yeah.
And then earlier on, you said you'd spoken to these 50 very, very rich people in the pursuit of writing the books that you've written about wealth and finance and money.
Pattern recognition.
That's right.
What is the pattern that you noticed in those people that you then applied to yourself?
What is the pattern?
You know, this is called the diary of a CEO.
So I'm sure we have a lot of people that are thinking about building businesses, want to get financially free, especially in a world of AI where they're very uncertain about how they'll make money and how they'll provide stability to their family.
What is the pattern that you have found in all of those people that you have met and interviewed?
And I know you know some of the most wealthy people on Earth because I know you coach a lot of them.
I don't think people fully realize the significance of how many of the most influential people on planet Earth you have worked with and continue to work with.
I found it hilarious reading that Bill Clinton called you the day before he was going to be impeached, telling you that he was going to be impeached and asking you what he should do.
Yeah.
First, let's say what everybody makes the mistake on the majority of people.
We live in a free enterprise system and we have kids that all think communism is great.
I just want you to know I went to the USSR when I was still the USSR.
I was 24 years old.
I was brought there because of my firewalking experience.
And I went on a train from Moscow to Siberia and back for two weeks.
On the train.
We were all fed caviar and the most incredible meals, as were all the Russians on the plane.
Right.
We're supposed to be all equal.
Right?
That's supposedly what communism is.
Everything's fair for everybody.
Every single town, we'd stop in the square where they're there.
And in the square there's a big building and they wrapped around for about maybe a quarter of a mile.
People standing in the freezing cold to get a quart of milk and a half a thing of bread.
I left there, and I became a capitalist.
I didn't know what a capitalist was, but I knew I wasn't a communist, right?
So people in our country are the free enterprise system, but they don't understand it.
So what are they making the mistake of?
They're consumers.
They're not owners.
We are a consumer society, and we train these kids to be consumers, adults as well.
So I'll give you a simple example.
I was trying to give an example to a young kid the other day, so I actually did the math on it.
You have an iPhone?
Yeah.
Okay.
Have you always had an iPhone?
No.
Well, yeah, for the last decade or more, yeah.
All right.
So iPhone's around for, what, 18 years, 19 years?
I went and did the numbers and found out what the cost was for every iPhone and it up.
If you've got an iPhone, each time somebody who's older than that, you spent 22000 and some change.
That's the retail price.
If you bought the stock.
I went and saw what the stock was.
On the same day the thing came out and you bought the stock.
Same amount of money of the stock.
Apple stock.
Apple stock.
$326,000 right now.
Instead of out 22 grand, you have 326.
If you're going to use an Apple phone I'm not saying Apple specifically, I'm not making a recommendation.
Why would you not own the company?
Right?
Because we don't teach people to think that way.
And so now they think communism is going to be the answer.
They don't understand what that really means.
They have no clue.
So you have to become an owner.
You have, that's what you have to do.
Then the second piece is when I interviewed all these people, I found four things with them.
I found number one.
Their focus didn't matter if they're a macro trader or if they were value trader, or it didn't matter what their style was.
The four things that had in common.
I call them the core four was number one.
They all were focused on not losing money.
Most people are trying to make money.
And the reason is they know if you lose, you know you lose.
You get 100000 investment and you lose 50.
How much do you have to grow your money to get your money back?
And people will say 50%.
No, you got to grow it 100%.
Right.
Get it.
Yeah.
Right.
So they know that.
So they're first making sure they don't know.
How do they do that?
They do it by asset allocation.
Right.
They all have different asset allocation strategies which, at the most basic level is you don't put all your eggs in one basket.
Most people put all their money in their business or their house or Right.
They know that that is the kiss of death.
And so they look at how to divide their assets where they have a certain amount in a more secure environment, meaning not a lot of upside, but it's like the nest egg.
And they have some that are more at risk and there's different.
And I learned what theirs are and I taught those different ones.
But the most valuable one I know.
You know because I read it in your book and I was really impressed.
Asymmetrical risk reward.
Their entire focus is not about taking risks.
There are only a few people.
You think you're a billionaire because you took giant risks.
No, no, no.
Some do, but they don't usually stay billionaires doing that.
How do they do it?
They figure out what's the smallest amount of risk with the most amount of upside that I can do.
And so Paul Tudor Jones' approach was five to one.
If I'm going to risk a dollar, I want to be certain I'm going to make five.
You and I, most average people would normally think.
I used to think well 12 15 20, return right.
But here's how it works.
If I risk $1 and I'm certain I'm going to make $5 and I'm wrong, I'm down $1.
I can risk $1 and still make $4.
I can be wrong four times out of five and still be okay.
That's how those guys become billionaires.
Asymmetrical reward.
I was talking to a gentleman who in 19 – 2008, excuse me.
He took $25 million and turned it into $2 billion in the worst economic time.
He anticipated what was going to happen with real estate.
Everybody thought it was going to keep going up.
He used synthetic bets and bet against it and made $2 billion.
Brilliant, brilliant job.
And I said to him, you know, what is the things that's missing for investors?
He goes.
Well, the smartest investors are usually the worst investors, because they want absolute certainty.
They know everything before they decide.
And by that time, the opportunity is gone.
And he said, but the most important key for him was asymmetrical risk reward.
He said, I risked, I think he said he risked six cents for every dollar.
He could have been wrong a dozen times, but he wasn't.
That's how he did it, right?
And then the fourth one is the obvious one we both know, which is diversification.
But this is the real key.
You know Ray Dalio is, right?
Yeah, I've interviewed him actually.
Yeah, so Ray's a good friend.
One of the questions I asked him was if we had to reduce it to the single most important investment principle to know.
I mean, you're the da Vinci of investing.
No one has made more money than you in this area.
And I said, what is it?
Is there one?
There's got to be one.
And he goes, Tony, there is.
He goes, I spent almost nine years refining this, and it's so simple.
The holy grail of investing is to find eight to 12 uncorrelated investments that you feel strongly about.
If you find eight to 12 of those, you reduce your risk 80% and keep your upside.
In fact, you slightly enhance your upside. uncorrelated for someone.
Uncorrelated.
Now, that's the hard part today, because so many markets are correlated.
What does uncorrelated mean for someone that does this?
Well, for example, stocks and bonds.
Traditionally I thought it was uncorrelated, meaning you know stocks in a tough time those are the excuse me in a growing time, stocks are where you put your money, but bonds are to protect you when the market goes down.
Unfortunately doing most things like 2008 or 2020.
They both go down at that time, but nobody talks about that.
They just go, oh, it's this weird thing.
It happens regularly.
So things that don't move together.
That's right.
They don't move together.
Well, so much is tied together today.
But the only way to really do it is you've got to have private investment, private equity, private credit, private real estate.
You have to diversify beyond just stocks and bonds.
And then you can get that across it by different industries, different elements.
Because think about this.
This will blow your mind.
Private equity, basic private equity, not I interviewed 12 of the best in the world.
Basic private equity has outproduced every stock market in the world for 40 years.
Every single stock market in the world every year for 40 years.
Now, you don't have total liquidity.
You're giving something up, but your returns are in a different place.
They don't have to sell when things are tough.
They take advantage.
These are the smartest people out there.
And they're not just trying to get alpha.
They're building value, right?
They take a company.
They put AI in it.
They bring new people to it.
And then they take it to the public, or in most cases, they sell it to private companies.
There are fewer public companies than ever.
So I looked it up, and it was a fantastic seed.
The average S&P for 39 years was 9%.
Nice return.
If you put a million dollars down, you know you'd have 28 million.
You know, 39 years later, without doing anything,
But if you put it in basic private equity, basic private equity is average 15.7%.
Think about the difference of compounding that every single year.
It's crazy.
Now it's worth $328 million.
That's the difference between the same investment in public versus private.
So it's finding these pieces.
But when you do 8 to 12 uncorrelated investments or more, reduce your risk by 80%.
That's how you get higher returns and the same time because most people are behind.
You didn't come from a financial background.
No, I have no financial background.
You didn't study finance in university.
No.
So where did you learn all this stuff about finance?
By going to the very best on earth.
Like why would I go to university to a professor who's never done anything, when I can go to 50 of the smartest people on earth?
Or in private equity, I went to 13 of the smartest ones, most successful in history.
Is your superpower learning?
Yes, I think that's what I tried to say to you from the beginning.
That's what pattern recognition, pattern utilization, pattern creation is.
If you don't learn at a rapid tempo in the world right now, you're cheating yourself of an extraordinary life.
Is there a tactic or a strategy to make me a better learner?
Especially someone that does this podcast.
I get to meet people like you, so I want to store everything in this time that we have.
Yes, I believe in immersion and spaced repetition.
So I believe, like, did you take a language in school?
Oh, God, yeah, German.
Can you speak it?
That's right.
So most people go to college or high school and college and they take a language, right?
And five years later, 10 years later, they can't speak a word, right?
Immersion is how you do it.
So if I wanted to teach you a language and you had the time and money, I would take you to Italy and I would drop you in the middle of Rome and say I'll see you in 90 days.
With no one to teach you in 90 days, are you going to be speaking the language?
You're going to speak the language.
You're going to know the nuances of the language.
You're going to have a pitch and tone.
That's more there, because it's how you learned originally, by total immersion.
So the reason I do 12 hours a day for four days –
50 hours in a weekend or 60 hours.
And most people think I'll never do that, but they're having the time of their life.
So time disappears when you're enjoying yourself and you hate it.
I mean, it feels like eternity.
But the reason I'm able to do that is that immersion is like years of experience and you're in a peak state while you're doing it.
So you remember it because it's locked in like 9-11. as opposed to 811.
So I lived out.
The other thing that I do is I'm capturing it.
I use AI now to do it.
I've kept journals my whole life, just like it looks like you've done.
But I'm building on it.
But I have my AI that I've been feeding over and, over and over again.
The things I wanted to remember, the principles.
And I create structures to evaluate these things.
And I asked you there about how these wealthy investors make their money.
The last question I really have around this is how the best entrepreneurs in the world make their money.
Again, we're called the Diary of a CEO.
So there's lots of entrepreneurs and business builders watching.
And I know you've worked with many of the world's top entrepreneurs.
In fact, one of them wrote you a letter.
Oh, which one?
Mark Benioff.
Oh, I love Mark.
He's a beautiful man.
For anyone that doesn't know who Mark is, he's the founder CEO of Salesforce.
Yes.
Yeah, he actually came to four, I think, or five of my seminars originally in a row, same seminar.
And, you know, Mark's as big as I am.
He's a big guy.
And he was going for it full tilt.
And finally, after the fourth one, he came up to me and said you've convinced me, I'm going to leave Oracle.
I'm going to start my own business.
I want you to come on the journey with me.
It's called Salesforce.com.
He said, we're going to change business around the world.
And he said this to me, he goes, And I promise you, we'll get to $100 million in business.
Now he's doing like $42 billion, right?
But what I love about Mark is he's a contributor.
He's a social CEO.
He does things for society.
He isn't just about himself.
He's an extraordinary human being.
He said, dear Tony.
I'm so deeply grateful for everything that you've done for me over the last four decades.
He talked about the seminars he'd been to with you and says that you've transformed his life through your inspiration and ideas.
He talks about that particular seminar you referenced as the moment that led him to go deeper and deeper and deeper.
He said it was at date with Destiny that I made the firm decision to leave Oracle and start my own company.
We even had a brief conversation about it back then, if you remember.
I remember.
Fast forward...
26 years and Salesforce now has 80,000 employees and generates over 40 billion in revenue annually.
It stands as the largest enterprise software company in the world.
I truly could not have done it without you by my side.
And, as you always say, we often overestimate what we can do in one year, but we vastly underestimate what we can do in a Tony.
I started this letter with gratitude and I'll end it the same way.
When I reached my most difficult moments, you were there.
When I reached my highest heights, you were also there.
I never forgot that whenever I reached out for help, you returned the phone call or text always quickly.
Business and politics are temporal, but relationships are eternal, and yours is one I carry with me always.
Congratulations on everything you're doing.
I look forward to a wonderful future with you.
Aloha, Mark.
That's very beautiful.
That makes me a little emotional.
I love Mark.
He's such a good man.
And that's very kind of him to write that letter.
He gives me more credit than I deserve.
But I love him personally.
I love strangers.
I'm driven by that.
But I love Mark because he's such a giver.
I see him as a role model of what a great CEO is someone who understands the social impact of what they're doing as well as the business impact.
He's got a heart of gold.
And of course, we all have ups and downs throughout our lives.
And he thinks he's just, I've just helped him.
He's helped me too.
It's like, it's never a one-way piece.
It's not like I go around and coach all these people.
I'm no idiot.
I've learned so much from Mark.
It's priceless.
So I have to send that thanks right back to him.
No question about it.
Where does that emotion come from, nice, in your face?
I don't know.
It's just like I'm an emotional guy.
I'm an empathetic guy, and I'm a lover.
That's what drives all that I do.
And to see somebody I love and to see how far he's come and to know that I've been able to be helpful to him at key moments is meaningful.
It's extremely meaningful because he's provided opportunities for me, millions of people 80000 employees, but millions of people through his creativity and his focus, and We've done a lot of cool things together.
I called him one time.
I was up in San Francisco for other business.
And I read in the paper that this landlord was kicking out these nuns who had the food kitchen in the worst part of the city, there in the Tenderloin District.
And I was like, this guy's an idiot.
I mean, I got to do something.
So instead of leaving, I spent an extra day and I went and met these nuns.
Most incredible ladies.
And they were spending all their time cooking food so they could sell food, so they could make money, so they could actually prepare food for the homeless there.
And in this tiny little building, and they were getting kicked out.
So I called the owner and I said, listen, I own a lot of real estate also.
I understand your rights as a real estate guy.
But I said, do you want to be the most hated guy in San Francisco?
I said, I'll give you an option.
How about let them stay to the end of the year.
I'll pay their lease.
I'll pay twice the amount and then I'll get them out.
I said, but you don't push them out now on the street.
So we agreed.
And so then I said to ladies, let's find a place for you and I'll help you find a place.
We'll rent a place for you.
And then I started getting phone calls and the phone calls I got.
So it was realtor and he goes, they're looking to buy a place.
And I said, I said, well, where are they getting the money?
They said, I don't know.
So I called, made none up.
And she goes.
I said, you know?
I said I'd pay for a place for you guys for a year.
You know, lease you a place.
I said, but I hear you're looking to buy a place.
Do you guys have some capital I'm going to wear?
And she goes, no.
She goes, God will provide, Tony.
Like, God will provide.
So I spent, I don't know, a million, two, something like that to find them a place.
But then I called Mark because I didn't want them living in the place.
I said, Mark, match me on this.
And, I mean, he didn't hesitate a second.
He had not even met the nuns.
Then he went to the nuns.
We went and met them.
And he went and he bought them a home for them to stay in.
And then we went through four years of the city trying to not let them take over this place.
But that's the kind of guy Mark is.
So he's incredibly generous.
And I'm very touched that I could count him as a friend and be helpful to him.
And he's been so helpful to me.
I've learned quite a lot about you today just from observing you.
And one of the big things that I've learned is the two moments where I've seen tears in your eyes have both been moments where people have expressed a huge amount of love and appreciation for you.
It's true.
And I work back through your earliest years and again it's almost like a jigsaw puzzle coming into formation in my mind of how much you love, love.
I do.
I think love is life.
Love is the driving force in my life, for sure.
There's no question about it.
And that's why I hate to see suffering, because it's the opposite of love.
If you love somebody, what do you do?
Anything you can.
That's what I'm called to do.
And it is, it's a calling.
It's not a job.
It's not a business.
You know, I have all kinds of businesses, obviously, and I enjoy business, but this is my mission.
This is what I'm made for.
And I'm just one guy that I can't do everything, but I can do a lot.
And I'm always thinking how to scale myself.
My wife and I.
We're fortunate enough to have our own plane, and I don't want to just burn up a bunch of carbon.
So I found out it's 3,000 trees.
I said, let's plant 100 million trees.
So we're up to 75 million.
I think we're going to hit the 100 million this year.
But we didn't just plant the trees.
We taught the farmers, worked with an organization about how to build a crop not once a year, but to do it across 12 different months so that something drops, they come out, and they go from – earning $1.25 a day and starving to making $12 a day, which doesn't sound like much, makes them rich in that community.
So we're doing that.
It's like, I just, I love taking things to scale too.
It's like, I love the individual impact and I love the global impact.
The combination of the two make life ever challenging and ever exciting.
With people like Mark and entrepreneurs.
My last question about this pattern recognition and my last question is just as me, I'm an entrepreneur.
I'm building businesses at the moment.
I'm earlier in my journey, much earlier than someone like Mark.
But what is the pattern that you've seen in these exceptional founders and entrepreneurs, as it relates to building great businesses, that you would impart on me?
I don't think there's anything I'm going to impart on you that you don't already know, because the fundamentals are so simple.
The business has to be more than a vehicle for money.
And don't get me wrong.
I mean, there are people who certainly succeed that way.
But if you look at the people that build something that's lasting, it has to be a passion where it's something you believe in so much.
It's so valuable.
It's a contribution sense to you, not just an economic sense.
Because in the beginning of a business, it's like having a child, you know.
You don't get a lot back.
You work around the clock.
You'll discover when your first child comes and you love them.
It's the pride of ownership.
But if you're just – a lot of people start a business, think they're going to get rich overnight or make some – and those people never succeed.
So it's like finding something, a vision that not only you believe in, but others are completely moved by, because you can attract people.
You can't build an organization without great people.
Do you think I could run all these companies if I was just sitting there every day?
I mean, I've got some of the greatest leaders I could possibly recruit.
I'm constantly looking for the second part, which is how do I find leaders?
How do I find leaders that are smarter than I am in various areas and where I can pull together the right people together and create a culture that adds massive value and continually does so, until it dominates that industry or that market or whatever?
That marketplace.
So I think you have to find something that's more than just a business for you.
It has to be more than economics for you.
It has to be a mission for the most successful people.
You have to be able to have something you can articulate that can attract people.
And you have to constantly find the very best that you can.
And you got to constantly prune. because the law of familiarity shows up.
That's what your friends went through, right?
They got all these great things, but now how great it is after a while, it's familiar.
You know, it's like, they don't have the same hunger.
I look for not only wickedly smart people, which I love, but hungry people.
When people ask me like what is the one common denominator of people that succeed on a massive scale around the world?
I'd always in the beginning say well, I love wicked intelligence, but I know a lot of very smart people that I can't fight through out of a paper bag in their relationship or their finances.
You know, they're smart in one area, not another.
But the one that is absolutely completely accurate is hunger.
The hunger to be more, to do more, to give more, to share more.
Somebody who has a hunger that doesn't die, not a hunger to make a certain amount of money or a hunger to achieve a swimsuit size, but a hunger that's unquenchable.
Those are the people that you know their names.
Because they have an impact.
So it's like whether it's Richard Branson who's in his 70s.
He has the same hunger today as when he was 16 years old in that crypt in your country, coming up with Virgin right.
I mean, it's the same level.
Let's give it a go, right?
He's got that piece, you know.
Anybody you see.
Look at the people you have on your show and think about how many of them still have that hunger.
Kevin Hart, he's a friend of mine.
I know he's been on your show.
I mean, he's one of the hardest working guys, but he's hungry.
He loves it.
He just wants to do it all.
To me, that's the gift.
And stoking your hunger or awaking someone's hunger that doesn't have it, that's a real gift.
And that's one of the gifts I think I've tried to refine within myself and help people with.
My last question is of all the things we've talked about today and everything else that's going on in your life and the world, what is the most important thing we should have talked about that we didn't talk about?
We covered a lot of territory.
I'm impressed by the diversity of what we got to cover.
Thank you.
We went deep.
I don't know if there's anything off the top of my head right now.
I do think that I hope people leave with the idea that if I'm stressed in my life I got to stop managing.
I got to start creating.
And that sounds like just an overwhelming thing, but it's like creating life on your terms, like deciding what are the immutables.
It's like if you want to take the island, you've got to burn your boats.
If you have a way to go back, the mind will rationalize and you will go back.
But if you really are committed to a greater quality of life, You've got to master the science of achievement and the art of fulfillment.
And fulfillment is not like achievement.
There's very cool rules for achievement.
Like what to do with your body.
Multiple ones, but there's certain fundamentals that are immutable.
What to do financially.
Certain things that are immutable.
Fulfillment?
Success without fulfillment is failure.
And fulfillment is an art.
It's not a science.
It's different for you and me and everybody we meet.
And so I'll tell you one real fast example.
I know we've gone over in time.
Steve Wynn's a good friend of mine.
Built most of Las Vegas.
Brilliant guy.
Absolutely brilliant.
And one day Steve calls up.
He goes, there's a painting that I have coveted for over a decade.
And he goes.
I just recently outbid everybody at Sotheby's and it just got delivered and you got to see it.
And I said, okay, I can't see it.
I said, but I got to ask a question.
How much did it set you back?
And he goes, $86.9 million.
I go, $86.9 million?
Okay, I got to see what an $87 million painting looks like.
So I go to his house.
He takes me in. shows me this wall.
It's a red square.
It's a Rothko, if you know what a Rothko is.
It's a red square.
And it's not totally red, a little red and orange, right?
And I look at him, I go, Steve, they missed some spots.
And he looks at me and gives me the look, and I start to tease him a little bit.
I go Steve, if you give me 100 with the red paint and you give me 10 minutes, I think I can match this.
I'm just screwing with him a little bit.
He knows I'm screwing with him.
He goes, you know, this is a Rothko.
I said, I know.
He goes, no, but you don't know.
Like, you know, he committed suicide.
He tells me the whole story, right?
And I go, well, that better be blood if he has $87 million, right?
But the reason I tell you this story is it's not making fun of Steve.
It's making fun of me.
He can look at that and he can barely see, and he knows what every stroke means.
It has meaning for him.
He knows what it's about, what it means, the uniqueness of it.
He knows the man's life.
I see a red square.
He has an experience.
The richness of life is when you go deeper and figure out what makes you feel like it's a red square for someone else, but this is your thing.
This is what fulfills you.
I know what fulfills me.
Family love, as you can probably tell, and contribution in a meaningful way, light me up like a Christmas tree and they've made me go for 66 years and it'll keep me going right.
But people got to find what that is for themselves, because if you succeed and you're not fulfilled, what do you got?
How many people have taken their life as super successful on the surface, but they weren't fulfilled?
Some of the people made everybody on earth laugh when they took their life.
Some people did businesses and took their life.
I don't think most people are going to take their life, but you don't want to live more decades and not really be here, not experiencing fulfillment.
So my passion is to help people be fulfilled, not just achieve.
Amen.
I mean, I've got so many other photos that I might as well show you the ones of.
This is the moment my wife and I met.
That is the moment you met.
Literally the moment we met.
How did you get this?
That's my mom.
That's Jim Robbins.
This man adopted me.
Oh, that's down.
This one is actually down in Haiti.
I went down there.
That's where the first group of people went to save all these kids.
These were kids that had been trafficked.
Yeah, my brother and sister.
Wow.
You do your homework.
Very impressive.
We have a closing tradition where the last guest leaves a question for the next, not knowing who they're leaving it for.
And the question left for you is, if you could choose your life span, how long would it be?
And at what point would you choose to die?
Hmm.
That's a great question.
Well, I certainly want to live.
I don't know if I'd want to live forever.
I don't know, you know, there's talk about, you know, uploading your consciousness to a machine and so forth.
I don't, I believe in spirit and soul.
I don't know if that's going to be uplifting machine.
Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe it's just the process, but I want to leave as much legacy as possible.
I want to live as long as I'm interested and useful.
You know, those are the two things that really matter.
And, you know, my minimum, I think, is 92 is my goal, as if I had control, right?
Life will tell me.
But 92 is the number that somehow I've had in my head.
And with some of the boosts we have with biochemistry and element stem cells, who knows?
Maybe it goes past 100.
But I think a century of living and giving would be an extraordinary experience for me.
I don't know if I'd want to live for eternity, but...
I'm not at that point where that's really a choice, so I don't have to think about it.
I will tell you the only fear that I really felt in my life was dying too soon.
I think part of my drive early on was just I want to squeeze everything out of life while I'm here.
I don't know where it's come from.
I think you know a couple of things could have contributed to it, but I think death was a good counselor for me.
It gave me drive to the today.
It's not a fear for me, other than I want to be here as long as I can for my family and for especially all my children, but especially my youngest.
But yeah, that would be my answer.
I'd say not forever, but as long as I'm useful and helpful and I can enjoy it all.
You used the word legacy there.
Yeah, well, legacy is what I leave when I'm gone.
In other words, I don't have to be here to continue to have impact, right?
It's like that's the best part of life.
I looked at, you know, leadership is influence, right?
What makes you a leader is your ability to influence thoughts feelings emotions, actions of another person.
If you're a positive leader, for good.
And I look at levels of influence.
One is can you influence someone to change their state?
Then it's can you influence them to change their state when you're not there?
So you're no longer a manager, right?
You've changed their values.
Could you change your state?
And they're not there for a group of people right.
Could you change your state with a mass number of people and you're not there, right?
That to me is the ultimate level of influence.
And now with audios and videos and AI, especially with AI, I've got an AI that's amazing.
We have 4.9 on Apple and people love it and their life's changed by it.
And I'm working right now with another group to create a platform for interventions and therapy that's not just me with AI, Because there aren't enough therapists, there aren't enough great therapists in the world.
I want to have that.
It's already in 50 languages.
So the whole world, I want to have a legacy that the world has people that can help them 24-7, 365.
And I think AI is one of the tools.
It's getting better and better to do that.
And what happens when you die?
Where do you go?
I don't think anything in the universe.
I know nothing in the universe ever destroys or changes form.
What does that look like?
Do I have conscious awareness as I do now?
I don't know the answer to that question.
All I want to do is make sure I live fully while I'm here and whatever's next when it shows up, I'll take that journey.
Thank you so much.
For so many reasons.
I think you've been a mentor to so many of us for so long in so many ways.
I remember how profoundly impacted I was when I watched your piece on Netflix.
I'm not your guru, yeah.
Yeah, that was really the front door for me into your world.
I'd seen your work before.
I'd read the books and stuff.
But for me, that was really a paradigm shifting moment.
I think it was in that documentary where there was a young man who was suicidal.
Yeah, it was that one, the Netflix.
Yeah, there was one.
That's how it started, actually.
Matthias?
Yes, Matthias.
Matthias.
That was, what, six years ago?
No, that was 2014.
Okay, wow.
11 years ago, yeah.
Gosh.
There was a young woman there also.
I don't know if you remember the young woman that was in that sex cult where they made the children have sex with the adults.
That one was very emotional.
I was down in Brazil and I was doing a seminar for about 10000 people and I'm walking through the aisle and this woman kept looking at me, and then I didn't realize it.
She goes, don't you recognize me?
And it was her.
She got herself out of the group.
She wrote a book.
She's now a therapist.
She helps other people get out of it, so...
It's really fun to see years later.
We actually did a follow up at the seven year mark or something like that afterwards, to show what happened with these families.
It's been really nice to see.
Did you say his name was Matthias?
Matthias?
Matthias.
He just wanted to.
He sent an email just to say that for anyone that doesn't know.
He was a guy in the audience who had suicidal ideation and was clearly struggling.
It's been a decade roughly since then.
You supported him, you helped him, and he just sent an email to say that attending that event that day was a huge dream for him and the experiences that he got from that have completely changed the trajectory of his life.
And those memories continue to impact him as he continues to support um his growth, his habits, his decisions and his outcomes.
He wanted to send his regards to you for that.
That's really kind of him to reach out.
That's nice.
I love seeing People a year later, 10 years later, 20 years later.
That's the great gift of my life.
I walk down the street anywhere on earth.
Sarah Desert, it's happened to me in China.
People come up and say, you changed my life.
And I always remind them, I didn't change the life you did, but glad I got to help.
What happened?
And then they tell me stories.
And outside my family, there's nothing that gives me more joy than to hear those stories.
Well, you've done that for more people than I could possibly receive emails from.
Hundreds, billions really, if we're counting the amount of people, the amount of meals you've fed through the work you've done through your company.
You've invested tremendously also in saving the planet through your green energy investments, which we didn't get to talk about today.
But I'm going to link that below for people to read about.
One thing I would mention, if I may, is Paramount approached me and we now have a 24-hour day channel.
And it's a fast channel, so it's free, advertised, supported television.
It's a TV I grew up with instead of cable.
So if you go to whether it's Pluto, or if you go to Roku, or if you go to Amazon Prime and you look for live TV, there's the Tony Robbins Network.
And 24 hours a day.
There's content there that's free, that anybody can watch and educate themselves in a full of interventions like these that you talked about.
So i hope some people will check it out because it's a, it's a way.
I'm another way.
I'm trying to give people a gift to support their lives.
I'm going to link that below and also i'm going to put a link below to your free three-day virtual event called time to rise, which i think we mentioned.
Oh yeah, please come to that.
You don't say come, you can do it from anywhere in the world your office, your home and it's coming up on the 29th through the 31st of january and it's perfect timing.
It's at the start of the new year, people thinking about making a change in their life.
I'm going to link that below as well, if anybody wants to attend.
It's free three days and it's.
I think it's a great continuation of the conversation we've had today, because we've talked so much about change, a changing world and how to change thyself, and that's what you've done for me, it's what you've done for so many people and it's an absolute honour.
It's actually for me.
I have certain moments in the job that I do where I think, fucking hell, like how lucky and grateful am I to get to do this.
And this is one of those such moments that is a real dream for me, because you're such a huge inspiration to me.
So thank you so much, Tony, for your graciousness.
I just want you, I feel the same way.
I feel like you're the next wave of contribution to this world and you're doing an amazing job already.
But I got a ticket to your parade.
I'm going to watch how you evolve over the next couple of decades.
And I know your contributions will only grow because I feel the sincerity in your heart not only to grow but to give.
And I hope that you continue to move towards that love and contribution you're talking about, because I think that's your true essence.
I think that's really what drives you anyway.
I think so too.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
We're done.
This is something that I've made for you.
I've realized that the Diary of a CEO audience are strivers.
Whether it's in business or health, we all have big goals that we want to accomplish.
And one of the things I've learned is that when you aim at the big big, big goal, it can feel incredible, incredibly psychologically uncomfortable, because it's kind of like being stood at the foot of Mount Everest and looking upwards.
The way to accomplish your goals is by breaking them down into tiny, small steps.
And we call this in our team, the 1%.
And actually this philosophy is highly responsible for much of our success here.
So what we've done so that you at home can accomplish any big goal that you have, is we've made these 1 diaries And we released these last year and they all sold out.
So I asked my team over and over again to bring the diaries back, but also to introduce some new colors and to make some minor tweaks to the diary.
So now we have a better range for you.
So if you have a big goal in mind and you need a framework and a process and some motivation, then I highly recommend you get one of these diaries before they all sell out once again.
And you can get yours now at thediary.com where you can get 20% off. our Black Friday bundle.
And if you want the link, the link is in the description below.
