Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners, Lee here.
Today's brand new story is about a boy who grows an orange tree in his stomach, which provides all sorts of unique business opportunities.
Grownups, guess what?
Until our new season debuts, you can get twice as many new stories in your feed by subscribing to Story Pirates Creator Club.
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But most of all, Creator Club members help us support the cost of the show so we can keep bringing it to you every single week.
If you're already a Creator Club member, thank you so much.
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Today's brand new story, plus another edition of Roll Call Live, with Lee and Peter coming up after a few more words for the grownups.
I'm very different from everybody.
Confusion is the step before curiosity.
Okay, that's a really funny idea.
We have to send that in.
I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling.
I believe all the things in my story.
Human beings are just able to create.
The Zoli Pirates.
Welcome back to the Story Pirates podcast.
OK, let's get this out of the way.
You really shouldn't eat orange seeds if you can help it and not because you'd grow an orange tree in your stomach.
That wouldn't actually happen just because our bodies aren't designed to digest orange seeds.
Or a lot of different seeds, actually.
But luckily for us, stories on the Story Pirates podcast aren't real life.
So we can still imagine what it would be like if eating orange seeds did make an orange tree grow in your stomach.
Here's the author to introduce it.
Hi, my name is Elias.
I'm nine years old and I live in Uganda.
This is my story, The Boy Who Ate Orange Seeds.
Oh, yes!
Another beautiful day, and what better way to start it than with a tasty orange?
Mom!
Yes, Elias?
Can I please have an orange for breakfast?
Only if you pair it with a slice of chicken breast.
Orange and chicken breast.
Name a better pair.
I'll wait.
Hey, Elias, think fast.
Ha!
Perfect catch for a perfect orange.
Remember, Elias, don't eat the seeds because if you do... I know, I know.
One day an orange tree will grow in my stomach.
All right, enjoy.
See you later, hun.
My mom is hilarious.
There is no way an orange tree is going to grow in my stomach.
I could eat one million seeds a day and I would still be orange tree free.
One week later...
Well, it's been a week and I've eaten a total of seven million orange seeds and I'm still orange tree free.
My mom was absolutely.
Oh, no.
Something is happening.
Oh, bleh.
Oh my goodness, a full orange fell out of my mouth.
Could there be an orange tree growing in my stomach after all?
Breaking news, my mom was right.
What was that, honey?
Nothing.
I could have sworn you said, breaking news, my mom was right.
No, I said, breaking news, my mom's aight.
What?
As in decent or mid.
That sounds like an insult, but I won't dwell.
Why don't you hurry up and eat this delicious breakfast of cold chicken breast I made for you?
Actually, I'm pretty full from this orange that fell out of my mouth.
I mean that I ate in my mouth.
Too full for chicken?
But we are chicken farmers.
Eating and loving chicken is our entire identity.
Are you sick?
Should I take you to the doctor?
Not the doctor!
I'm fine.
In fact, I think I heard the school bus outside.
Gotta go to school.
Here I am at school, and wait a minute.
The entire classroom is empty?
Oh, hello, Elias.
You're here.
Miss Edwards, where is everyone?
I am sorry to say.
The entire class came down with a nasty cold that you seem to have somehow avoided.
Someone must be getting their vitamin C. Am I ever.
Looks like you and I are the only ones who didn't catch this nasty bug.
Ah!
Oh, no, Ms.
Edwards.
It sounds like you might be actually coming down with something.
I have this homegrown orange that should keep you healthy.
Homegrown where?
In my stum... I mean, my garden.
25 cents and it's yours.
I feel like I shouldn't be buying things from my students.
But desperate times.
Here you are.
Whoa, my very own quarter.
Oh, bleh.
And here's your very own orange.
Did that come from your mouth?
Potentially.
Like I said, desperate times!
Say, I could make an easy buck off these stomach oranges.
To the farmer's market!
Welcome to the farmer's market.
We've got a special on seaweed and nut milks.
Can I get a basket started for you?
No, I'm not here to buy.
I'm here to sell oranges, baby.
Kid, we're literally swimming in oranges at the farmer's market.
Why should we sell yours?
What if I told you my oranges are grown from a tree that somehow managed to take root inside my stomach?
I'd say that's disgusting.
What if my disgusting stomach oranges cure the common cold?
Well, I'm currently nursing a weapons-grade sinus infection.
So, try me.
Have a slice of this.
Actually, I think I'm good on the orange.
Don't knock it till you try it.
Fine.
Whoa.
I'm breathing effortlessly through both nostrils.
Your stomach orange healed me.
Stall number five is yours.
Amazing.
One month from now, there's going to be a line around the park.
One month later.
All right, people, make the line.
No pushing.
There should be enough stomach oranges for everyone.
Golden flu season is around the corner.
I'll take two of your medicinal stomach oranges.
Here you go.
Wow, you really just...
Vomit them out, don't you?
Thanks!
My toddlers are in daycare and are walking germvectors.
I'll take four.
This is incredibly hard to watch.
Four stomach oranges.
Thanks.
Yes, I'd like 25 stomach oranges, please.
I plan on never being sick again.
Oh man, this is gonna be rough.
Huh.
I think I speak for the crowd when I say... Gross.
I'm sorry folks, but we have officially run out of oranges.
I physically cannot produce anymore at the moment.
I'll see you back here tomorrow.
Are you serious?
Another profit-filled day.
Time to go home in my limo, which I bought with my hard-earned stomach-orange money.
Where to, Elias, sir?
Limo driver!
My only friend.
Take me home and step on it, please.
I gotta get there before mom is home from work, so she still doesn't know about.
This whole orange tree growing in my stomach turned into a lucrative business thing.
Of course, sir.
We're home, sir.
Thanks, pal.
By the way, isn't that your mom?
Oh, dang!
Quick!
I better hide behind the limo.
Was that my son, Elias, jumping behind that limo?
Oh, it can't be.
I must be hallucinating because he has no business being in or around a limo.
I should go inside and lie down.
That was a close one.
Are you just going to let your mom believe she's seeing things?
Where does this web of lies end for you?
I never thought of it like that.
You're right, my best friend in the world.
I gotta come clean.
Mom, wait!
Elias?
You're not hallucinating.
I was, in fact, coming out of a limo.
And it's because you were right.
I did eat too many orange seeds.
And an orange tree did take root in my gut.
And the oranges from that tree cure the common cold.
And I've been selling my miracle oranges at the farmer's market every morning.
Wait, you haven't been going to school?
That's not the point.
The point is, please don't take me to the doctor.
Look, I won't take you to the doctor if you promise me one thing.
Anything?
You will start eating your chicken again.
Oh, Mom.
You got a deal.
You know you have to start going to school again, right?
Fine, I will.
But first, how about an immunity boost?
Well, that is a lot of oranges.
The end.
We'll be right back after a few words for the grownups.
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And now it's time for Story Pirates Roll Call.
Send us your story.
We read them all.
You know we love them.
Time for Story Pirates Roll Call.
Welcome back to Story Pirates Roll Call, where we take stories written by kids and we read them and we talk about them.
Peter, how's it going?
Lee, it's going great.
I'm excited to do this.
Are you ready for some stories?
Born ready.
Okay.
So this first one comes to us from Scarlett, a six-year-old in Texas, and it's called The Girl Who Loves Her Book, and It Came to Life.
Hmm.
Charlotte.
What a relaxing day to read my favorite book.
I get to stay in bed all day and I don't have to go anywhere else.
Mom.
Charlotte, it's time to wash the dishes.
Charlotte.
Coming, Mom.
I love washing the dishes.
Shwoo.
What was that?
I think my book came to life.
It's a unicorn.
Unicorn noises.
Marshmallow.
My name is Marshmallow.
I will take you anywhere you want.
Charlotte, okay, I'd like to go to the beach.
I'll pack up real quick.
I've got to go for just a little bit.
Marshmallow, we are at the beach.
Charlotte, yay, I'm going to build thousands of sandcastles.
Ah, I've built a thousand sandcastles.
It's time to go home.
Or maybe that might be, ah, I've built a thousand sandcastles.
It's time to go home.
Marshmallow, I'm sorry.
I'm getting sucked into a giant clam.
What?
The end.
Oh, no.
Whoa.
I have so many things to say about this, Lee.
Please.
This story seems... Well, first of all...
It's so pleasant.
Charlotte is excited to read her book, and then her mom makes her do chores and she actually likes the chores.
She's so pleasant.
And then magically her book becomes a unicorn and she goes to the beach and it's all perfect and there's no problems, until the very end.
I'm getting sucked into a giant clam.
I know.
It's just like, after so many... fortuitous turns of events the very end of the story is just like the worst thing that could happen to you on that day you know that feeling you ever i try not to have it but sometimes when everything's just going so right yeah you start to go like it can't keep going this well can it yeah um and no it can't because you should enjoy it while it's happening Next thing you know, your new marshmallow unicorn has been sucked into a giant clam.
That's right.
Which doesn't happen that often.
Do you think that a giant clam, like this is just a passive clam that's just whatever comes by?
Or it's like an evil giant clam?
I think it's just whatever.
I think it's like a normal clam in the ocean.
I don't think it's evil.
You know, I think the author clearly would have let us know if we should characterize this clam as anything other than just a normal clam you'd find in the ocean.
Well, it's giant.
We know that.
That's true.
All right.
Well, Scarlett, we love your story.
Thank you so much for sending it in.
Peter, would you read us the next story?
I would love to.
This story comes to us from a 10-year-old from Pennsylvania named Julian.
And Julian's story is called Cuckoo Kebab.
My name is Johnny McJelly'd Belly, and I love to eat.
Today, I'm very hungry, and I want to make some good food.
Here's what I have to start with.
My fridge is practically empty, except I do have ketchup mustard sprinkles, cheese cookies, relish sour cream, burger patties pickles, supersized hot dogs, a birthday cake, chicken logs, ice cream lemons, yummy custard, a super salad and some stone ground mustard.
But what could I possibly make with this?
Let's make a kebab.
Not just any kebab.
This is a cuckoo kebab.
Now it's time to eat it.
Eating noises here.
Oh boy, I don't feel so good.
Dot, dot, dot, dot.
The end.
Okay, so, Julian, awesome story, but this fridge is not practically empty.
It's practically busting at the seams.
Bursting at the seams, even.
By the way, do you know what a chicken log is?
I have never heard that before, but I assume a chicken log is like a chicken leg?
No, I don't know what it is.
I think that Julian is choosing things that are in their fridge at home that they assume need no further explanation, such as stone-ground mustard.
Stone-ground mustard.
I don't know that I know what that is, but if I heard it, I'd be like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
If you saw it on a package, you'd be like, oh, it's fancy mustard.
It's probably got little seeds in it.
Yeah, exactly.
It's ground with stones.
You put it on a knockwurst.
Well, mustard is a seed, right?
Yes.
Right?
So you want to make it into a squishy squelch.
You got to ground it.
You need to bust it.
You need to burst it at the seed level.
So here's my other... It's bursting at the seeds.
Here's my other... And that's all we got for today.
All right.
So...
This is my other question.
The technical definition of kebab and I looked this up because I was like, can it be a kebab if it has all these things on it?
And a kebab is defined as meat and vegetables only, as far as I can tell.
But here is something that is very interesting, is that kebab, K-E-B-A-B, and kebab, K-A-B-O-B, are the same dish—
But the difference in spelling is purely one of regional preference, but they're pronounced exactly the same.
It's true.
Kebab, kebab.
Although in Down Under, like New Zealand... Shrimp on the Bobby?
No, well, they don't say that, but they say a kebab.
Kebab?
I love a kebab.
I think you're thinking of like...
Of Wisconsin and Minnesota.
Oh, that's how we have a kebab.
Oh, kebabs.
You want a kebab?
Yeah, put a kebab on the grill.
Put a shrimp on the barbie.
Bob.
Bob.
You're right.
I did grow up saying Bob.
Bob.
Bob.
Bob, did you put the kebabs?
Mom.
Mom, you got the kebabs?
Mom, you got the kebabs?
Where's my bag?
Bob's got them.
I have to have them.
All right, let's read the last story, shall we, Lee?
All right.
This is from Olive in Oregon, a seven-year-old, and this story is called Sir Weirdo's French Fries.
This is the story of a knight that didn't know how to be a knight.
His name was Sir Weirdo.
He had a best friend talking elephant.
I don't know how they met, but it was a very funny story.
The elephant wears a funny dress.
Sir Weirdo also has a dog that barks a lot.
Sir Weirdo led everyone to the king who was very angry, but was a millionaire.
The king's name was Joe.
Sir Weirdo brought French fries for King Joe that made him happy.
The end.
Wow.
There's like several stories in here i know, and my the first one that really popped out to me is uh, best friend is a talking elephant.
I don't know how they met, but it was a very funny story.
So all this is olive really understands character development and knows that you can't just give someone a sidekick and not tell a funny story about how they met, but doesn't really have the patience to tell us that story, Or it's like well, she's saying she doesn't know how they met, but it was a funny story.
How does she know?
Because people have been talking about it and she knows that, like everyone knows, they have some funny story of how they met, but I never actually heard it.
But it's good.
So the narrator here you're saying is like someone in the village who's like heard the talk.
Well, they're confident that it's a very funny story, but they don't know the story.
You're right.
Maybe it's a villager.
Uh, sir weirdo has a dog that barks a lot.
Do you think his name is sir barks a lot?
Sounds like it could be.
Yeah, and i also love that, sir.
Sir weirdo uh led everyone to the king, who is very angry but was a millionaire.
Like, how can you be angry if you're a millionaire?
Money can't buy me love.
Well, it should be able to.
If you're a millionaire, you should at least have enough consideration of the rest of us to not be angry.
Yes, at least pretend like your life is perfect.
Yeah, just enjoy yourself, you know?
Sir Weirdo led everyone to the king who was very angry about a millionaire.
Sounds like a revolution, right?
Or a revolt?
But the king's name was Joe.
Sir Weirdo doesn't... lead a mob to the castle he brings french fries to cheer up king joe and it works yeah olive your story is amazing thank you so much for sending it in uh and to read all of today's roll call stories just head to storypirates.com and remember you can watch an even longer version of roll call on the story pirates youtube page with help from your grown-up Now it's time for you to write us a story.
Grownups can submit stories at storypirates.com.
And remember, we respond to every single story we receive.
That's it for today's episode.
Thanks for listening.
And a big thanks to today's author, Elias.
We'll be back next week with more brand new stories.
Until then, stay creative and stay kind.
The Story Pirates Podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios.
Executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka.
This episode was produced by Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller, Lee Overtree and Austin Sanders.
Recording, sound design, and mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City.
Theme song by Bobby Lord.
Roll call theme by Andrew Barbato.
Musical scoring by Jack Mitchell.
Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin.
The Boy Who Ate Orange Seeds was written by Rachel Jorofsky and features performances by Greg Barnett, Ben Blackman, Katie Hammond, Blake Merriman, Peter McNerney, Megan O'Neill, Samantha Turrett, and Brandon Zellman.
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