Who do I want to become?
It's not about the goal.
It's about the growth you're willing to undertake in order to achieve the goal.
Success is quiet mornings, late nights and a hundred almosts before one yes.
Success is choosing discipline on the day's motivation doesn't show up.
Success is doing the work when no one's watching and no one's clapping.
Success is walking away from what drains you so you can protect what grows you.
The number one health and wellness podcast.
Jay Shetty.
Jay Shetty.
The one, the only Jay Shetty.
I was stuck, confused and unsuccessful until I did this.
What if I told you that one year from today, you could wake up as a completely different person.
And the only thing standing in the way is the way you're thinking about this year.
Most people never change their lives.
Not because they're lazy, not because they're untalented, but because they don't understand this one truth
Your life doesn't change in a year.
Your life changes in the tiny decisions you repeat for a year.
We waste entire years waiting for motivation, waiting for clarity, waiting for timing, waiting for confidence.
And while we wait, the year quietly disappears.
Here's an uncomfortable statistic.
92 of people never follow through on their New Year goals, not because they don't want to change, but because they're using hope as a strategy instead of a system.
But here's the inspiring part.
One year is long enough to transform almost anything about your life, your body, your relationships, your career, your self-worth, your habits, your emotional health, if you understand the science of real change.
In this episode, I'm going to give you a 12-month blueprint that has helped millions of people transform their lives a framework backed by psychology research and real human stories.
And I promise you this, by the end of these 30 minutes, you will no longer fear the future.
You will feel prepared to shape it.
So let's begin.
Before we talk about how to change your life, we need to talk about why most people don't.
It's not a lack of intelligence.
It's not a lack of discipline.
It's not a lack of opportunity.
It's a lack of a system.
Let me tell you a story.
A friend's one told me, Jay, I keep trying to change and nothing sticks.
Sound familiar?
He'd buy new planners, he'd download new apps, he'd watch motivational speeches, and every year he ended up exactly where he started exhausted and confused.
He wasn't failing, his strategy was failing in moments of temptation.
Only three to five minutes.
Motivation spikes and crashes.
But systems, routines, environments, structures, they keep going long after motivation dies.
So here's the first truth.
Your life won't change when you try harder.
It will change when you redesign the system you live inside.
Let's build that system together.
If you want a new year, you need a new default.
Most people try to change their life using motivation.
Science shows your environment drives 45% of your daily behavior, almost half your life.
Let me give you a real example.
I once worked with someone who could never stick to a morning routine.
She tried alarms, apps, planners, nothing worked.
Then we changed her environment.
We rearranged her nightstand.
We moved her phone to another room.
We put her journal where her phone used to be.
We laid out her gym clothes the night before right next to her bed.
We simplified her kitchen counter. suddenly her identity matched her environment.
She didn't become a disciplined person, she became a supported person.
Here's what I want you to do.
Here are some actionable steps for this year.
Number one, redesign your morning and night anchors.
These two 30-minute windows shape your entire day.
If you understand this one thing, you can build discipline.
Make the things you need easy to find and make the things you don't want hard to find.
You want to work out in the morning?
Make sure your gym clothes are easy to find.
You don't want to have a midnight snack?
Make sure those chips are hard to find.
This leads us to number two, remove friction from good habits.
Make good habits easier than bad ones.
So many of us make good habits hard to do.
We make it hard to stay healthy because our snack drawers are full of bad snacks.
We make it harder to work out because we subscribe to a gym that's 30 minutes away.
We make it harder to be focused on our work because our desk is full of clutter.
Number three, upgrade your identity.
Don't ask, what goal do I want?
We all go, what goal do I want?
Here's what I want you to ask instead.
Who do I want to become?
It's not about the goal.
It's about the growth you're willing to undertake in order to achieve the goal.
Success is quiet mornings, late nights, and a hundred almosts before one yes.
Success is choosing discipline on the days motivation doesn't show up.
Success is doing the work when no one's watching and no one's clapping.
Success is walking away from what drains you so you can protect what grows you.
Success is being patient with the process even when the results are late.
Success is becoming the person your future requires, not the person your past expects.
Here's the second truth.
A year equals four seasons of learning.
A year is long enough to learn a skill that can reroute your entire life.
Not a hobby, a skill.
Skills change identity, skills build confidence, skills increase opportunity, skills compound.
Statistics show learning a new skill reduces anxiety and depression by up to 34%.
Adults who engage in continuous learning report significantly higher life satisfaction.
Let me tell you a story.
A woman once told me she felt stuck in her job and stuck in her identity.
We made one shift.
She committed to learning public speaking 20 minutes a day, just 20 minutes.
One year later, she was leading meetings, pitching ideas confidently and interviewing for a promotion.
The skill didn't just change her career, it changed her self perception.
So here are practical choices that you can make this year.
Pick one of these and master it.
Public speaking, emotional regulation networking mindfulness, creative writing, financial literacy, communication skill.
One skill can create 10 opportunities.
I think about all the skills I invest in every single year and how they've transformed my life.
If you want to change your life in a year, learning one skill could help you accelerate and transform your trajectory in ways nothing else could.
Here's what I recommend.
Do what I call immersion weekends.
Spend a whole weekend attending courses seminars, reading books, listening to podcasts about that subject.
You will know very quickly what you want to invest in and what you want to spend more time on.
Here's the truth.
One decision can separate who you were from who you're becoming.
One decision can end an old chapter and begin a better one.
One decision can change your confidence forever.
And one decision can rewrite your entire story.
All it takes is one decision.
Truth number three, fix the relationships that matter because connection equals quality of life.
The Harvard study of adult development, conducted by Robert Waldinger, who I've had the honor of interviewing on On Purpose twice this is the longest happiness study ever done found the quality of your relationships is the strongest predictor of your future well-being.
Your life doesn't change alone.
Your life changes through better conversations, better boundaries and deeper connections.
So here's what I want you to do in 2026.
Repair one relationship this year that matters.
Release one draining connection that has expired.
Deepen one meaningful bond for more support.
Schedule one weekly connection ritual.
Here's the harsh truth.
Loneliness is not the absence of people, it's the absence of understanding.
Loneliness is not the absence of company it's being surrounded and still feeling unseen.
Loneliness is not the absence of conversation it's talking without ever being heard.
Loneliness is not the absence of relationships it's the absence of someone you can be honest with.
Loneliness is not the absence of someone it's the absence of safety.
Ask yourself which relationship is worth improving or which ones do you need to distance from?
Which relationship would have the greatest positive benefit in your life if you invested in it more?
Here are four questions that will change your relationships.
Who do you need to call more?
Who do you need to talk to less?
Who do you want to spend time with?
Who do you need to distance from?
If you focused on transforming your relationships this year it will transform your life.
You know what truly holds you back?
Relationships that drain you.
People who misunderstand you no matter how clearly you speak.
Conversations that take energy but give none back.
Connections that make you doubt yourself instead of support yourself.
It's not your potential that's limited.
It's the people who keep pulling you backwards while you're trying to push forward.
Take an inventory of the people in your life this year.
You don't have to make big changes.
You don't have to just cut people out, but recognize what would move the needle and give it some time and energy.
Truth number four, fear becomes bigger the further you stand from it.
Fear becomes smaller the closer you move toward it.
Action reduces anxiety.
Avoidance amplifies it.
Here are some practical steps for this year.
Create a fear list instead of a to-do list, right?
We all make to-do lists, but I want you to make a fear list.
Break each fear into five micro actions.
And then I want you to reward action, not outcome.
Because here's the mistake we make.
You don't have to overcome fear before you do something.
You have to do the thing whilst you're still feeling the fear.
You don't get over your fear, then start a business.
You start a business, feel scared, nervous and anxious, and still move forward.
What the fear list does is it makes you face what you're actually struggling with.
The reason you don't do your to-do list is because you're scared.
The reason you cancel that meeting is because you're scared.
The reason you don't send your resume is because you're scared.
The reason you don't ask for a promotion is because you're scared.
We're so scared of rejection, we're so scared of failing, that we don't take action before we can remove that feeling.
What we don't realize is that life is all about doing things even with the feelings that you think are holding you back.
Please don't let your fears ruin your future.
Please don't let your fears keep you stuck in places you've already outgrown.
Please don't let your fears make you walk away from something good before you've even tried.
Please don't let your fears turn temporary uncertainty into a lifetime of regret.
And please don't let your fears talk you out of the future you know you deserve.
It's fascinating to me how many of us set goals and don't meet them, not because the goals aren't right, but because we haven't addressed the fear.
If we don't face our fears, we can't move forward toward our goals.
So, instead of just looking at your goals every year and wondering why you're not there yet, make this the year you face your fears.
Address them, focus on them, break through them by taking action, even when they exist.
One of my favorite quotes that I've ever heard is, if you feel afraid, do it afraid.
If you feel scared, do it scared.
If you feel anxious, do it anxious.
And if you feel nervous, do it nervous.
It's better to do the thing, even feeling that way, than to hope you will get over that feeling so you can finally start.
Truth number six, the power of service.
Service isn't just charity.
Service is identity.
It's meaning.
It's medicine.
Neuroscience shows that helping others activates the brain's reward pathways, the same circuits that light up for purpose and joy.
There's even studies that show that when people are experiencing depression, if they help others with depression, theirs goes down.
So sometimes we also say to ourselves, I'll help when I have more, not realizing you'll have more if you help now.
If you help someone now, You feel greater self-esteem.
You count your blessings.
You realize what skills you have.
I learned about the skills and talents I have because I started using things in the service of others even before I knew I had them.
Here are some practical ways you can do that.
You could volunteer one hour a week.
You could help one person quietly.
You could use your skills for someone else's benefit or the community.
Pick one issue you worry about and get involved.
If you wanna change your life, change someone else's day.
If you wanna change your year, change someone else's week.
If you wanna change your month, change someone else's hour.
You can transform your life by transforming someone else's.
So here's your year redesigned.
Break your year into four 90-day seasons.
Season one, reset.
Redesign your environment and your habits.
Season two, learn.
Master two skills that change your confidence and direction.
Promise you it will make a big difference.
Season three, connect.
Repair, deepen, and rebuild relationships.
Season four, expand, face fears, take risks, and create something new.
You don't have to do everything I said in one season.
A year has four seasons.
You don't see the weather trying to snow, rain, sunshine, and everything else all in one day.
That's not what the climate tries to do.
Move in seasons.
Remember this, a year isn't 365 days.
It's 52 chances, 12 chapters, and four seasons.
Your life can change this year.
Not because the year is magical, but because you are capable.
You don't need a perfect plan.
You don't need certainty.
You don't need confidence.
You need momentum.
You need one decision.
You need one step, and you need to remember this.
One year of intention can undo 10 years of drifting.
So choose one thing today one habit, one relationship, one skill, one decision, one fear, one act of service, and just start.
A year from now, you will look back and barely recognize the person you used to be.
Because your life doesn't change someday.
It changes the day that you just start.
The insight and advice that I've shared with you today will truly make a difference.
I've had the fortune of having incredible years in my life where I have changed my life in a year.
And when you look at it that way, you actually give yourself the opportunity to transform.
Sometimes we want to change our life in a day.
We want to change our life in a month.
Give yourself a year this year to really make a difference.
See, we think consistency looks like this.
Real consistency looks like this, right?
If you think to yourself I'm going to work out five days a week, every week for the rest of the year the one week where you only do three days you'll feel like a failure.
So what do you do?
You recognize five's the average.
There'll be some weeks you do seven.
There'll be some weeks you do three.
There'll be some weeks you do four and there'll be some weeks you do six.
When you give yourself that flexibility and adaptability to hit the average not the ideal, every single week, you finally give yourself an opportunity to make a huge difference.
I've seen so many people try to put too much pressure on themselves.
I've seen so many people who've been so harsh to themselves.
If you really want this year to be the year that everything changes, follow these steps, stay accountable, find someone you can share these goals with and move forward together.
Your goal doesn't get you to the goal.
It's the growth that gets you to the goal.
How are you willing to grow?
Who are you willing to become?
What are you willing to change?
If you focus on transformation over the destination, you will get there quicker.
Often we keep looking at the goal and thinking it's so far away, it's so hard to get there, I don't know when it's going to happen.
If we just focused on the next step, the next step forward, just one step at a time, you'll be at the destination faster, in no time.
Please know that you can change your life in a year by changing the few things that I laid out.
And remember, I'm forever in your corner.
I'm always rooting for you and I wish you all the best.
Thank you so much for watching this video.
I'm so grateful for your support.
2026 is going to be the best year yet.
I want you to subscribe to my channel so you never miss a video.
Thank you so much for listening to this conversation.
If you enjoyed it, you'll love my chat with Adam Grant on why discomfort is the key to growth and the strategies for unlocking your hidden potential.
If you know you want to be more and achieve more this year, go check it out right now.
