I got the idea for this episode because I was quite literally... procrastinating writing an outline. for a podcast episode.
I didn't have an idea for a topic. I didn't have the mental energy to sit down and brainstorm.
And so I was procrastinating. Not to break the fourth wall, but I do spend a decent amount of time sitting down and doing building out a concept for my podcast episodes.
Because if I don't, I go off on too many... unnecessary tangents.
And I never come to any sort of conclusion.
I do need a little bit of organization or else the episode is just a mess.
So anyway, I'm actually glad that I'm having... a procrastination week this week.
Because... I do think that this is an important topic.
I mean, everyone... struggles with procrastination.
And at times... The human condition can feel like this constant fight. against procrastination.
I literally feel like life sometimes is just...
One big battle against procrastination because we constantly have things that we need to do.
And simultaneously we have so many things that we'd rather be doing. that are more fun, more lighthearted. more enjoyable.
Life is also a constant battle in one's mind. we're constantly having to remind ourselves that, that we have to get the work done before we can have our play, you know?
And the thing about procrastination is that not only... does it cause stress because we don't get things done that we need to get done.
And there's usually consequences for that.
Um, But also it can impact the way that we see ourselves.
Like it can impact our self-esteem. It's quite a nasty thing.
It never ends well. It causes a lot of distress. procrastination does.
And so I'm glad we're talking about it Because to be honest, procrastination is something that A lot of us just vaguely understand.
It's something that we know we do. But we don't necessarily fully understand why we do it. or how we can stop doing it, I think a lot of us are so busy struggling in this state of procrastination that we don't take the time to step back and ask ourselves, why are we procrastinating?
What's happening here? Why are we unable to get something done?
Like what's the root cause of the issue?
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Things people love. I think the first step to... learning how to manage something is to fully understand what it is.
So I will share with you the definition of procrastination.
Procrastination is the act of unnecessarily and voluntarily delaying or postponing something, despite knowing that there will be negative consequences for doing so.
I think the key detail here that might normally go unnoticed would be that procrastination only exists if there are negative consequences. for doing so.
Personally, I would say I have a very average... rate of procrastination.
I don't feel like I procrastinate more than the average person, but I
Definitely don't think I procrastinate less than the average person.
Like I would say I'm right in the middle.
I'm right at the average because I do procrastinate. relatively frequently, but I don't procrastinate to a point where it controls my life and ruins my life.
I still do get things done. I almost always meet the deadlines I need to meet For things in my life.
I have a decent enough. sense of willpower, I guess. you know, I can sort of push myself through feelings of procrastination probably 80% of the time. in order to get things done when I need to get them done.
But There are times that it gets the best of me and I don't get the shit done that I need to get done.
And... There are consequences and it's awful.
But I would say I'm a good person to discuss this topic because I do think I'm right at the average amount, you know?
So I find I personally procrastinate in a few different scenarios.
Like I have repeating offenders in my life that cause me to procrastinate.
Number one, when I have a task to do that will require me sitting and working for a long period of time, I mean, this is universal.
But it takes discipline to sit down with no distractions and to dedicate yourself to completing a task.
It takes a lot of discipline. And there are times when you don't have... the motivation to do that.
There are times when I'd rather be outside.
I'd rather be at the beach or something.
I'd rather be... on a little jog outside.
I'd rather be... In the sun, this is especially challenging during the summer.
But there are also times when I'd rather be sitting at my desk online shopping or on Instagram or on Pinterest or something like there are times when I would much rather use my sitting time to do something else.
It does take a level of mental strength to dedicate yourself to a task. for a long time.
And it's especially challenging when you know that It's going to take a while.
It's one thing to have a task. that will require you to sit and work for like 30 minutes.
But when you know that you have a task on your plate that's going to take four hours, five hours, maybe even three days. it's much more daunting and it's much more challenging to even get started.
So I find I procrastinate these types of things probably the most.
I also procrastinate when a task requires too much thinking.
I don't tend to have a problem finishing... mindless tasks.
Like, if a task requires little brain power...
I have no problem getting it done. I'll get it done immediately.
Even if, It's time consuming if it's somewhat mindless.
I can get it done. It's fine. But when something requires a level of... or a level of contemplation in order to be completed, that requires a certain headspace from me.
In order to work on a task like that, I have to be sharp.
I have to be on my A game. I have to be well rested.
I have to be in this perfect place in order for a task like that to be easy and fun and seamless and great.
But the truth is in life, we're rarely in that perfect place where we have lots of energy. and we're in a good mood and all is going well.
And we feel mentally strong. Like that's not a feeling that, we get to experience 100% of the time.
We maybe experience that feeling once 40% of the time, 50% of the time, I'm almost always challenged by something. exhausted by something.
I think we all are. It's rare that we feel like we're in this perfect mental state.
And it's almost always daunting to work on a task that requires a level of analysis and and contemplation.
It takes a lot of energy and just the nature of being a human is exhausting and challenging.
And so very rarely are we going to feel like we're in the perfect place. to work on that type of task.
I also procrastinate when I feel overwhelmed.
When I have too much on my plate, I have too many things that I'm supposed to be doing.
I end up doing nothing because I'm so overwhelmed by the amount of things that I need to do that I don't even know where to start.
And instead of starting, I procrastinate and I do not Get started.
And it's ironic because it's like when my... schedule is the most packed and I have the most that I'm supposed to be doing.
That's when I have the least energy to do anything.
And I end up sleeping all day and getting nothing done.
Whereas when I have nothing to do and my schedule is wide open, I am just nonstop.
I am... Suddenly I have... inspiration to get things done that I don't even have to be getting done. suddenly I'm doing even more.
You know what I'm saying? But it's a psychological game that I play with myself.
My brain... functions the best when there's no pressure.
You know? I also procrastinate when I'm not confident that I'll do a good job.
When I feel like an upcoming task is too challenging for me, I will procrastinate doing it because I don't want... to experience the failure that I think is going to come my way, you know?
I procrastinate completing the project more because I don't wanna experience the feeling of failure.
Now, in my conscious mind, I know that failure is okay.
It's important. Like it's an important thing.
You know, you have to fail. I know that.
And I know that all you can do is your best and the rest is just, it is what it is.
But still, subconsciously, I don't wanna fail.
Because even though failing is important, That doesn't mean it's fun.
And subconsciously, I don't want to fail.
And so I'll procrastinate if there's room for failure, which there is. almost everything, but there are times when it feels more overwhelming than other times.
And I would say the last reason why I procrastinate is when I'm emotionally distraught for some reason.
Now, I'm emotionally distraught frequently.
And I would argue... Everyone is like, I don't care who you are. there's always some shit happening.
You know what I mean? Nothing's ever perfect.
It's not like we ever get to just be in this state of perfect homeostasis.
Maybe, maybe every once in a while. But that's not... the resting position of a human.
That's not the place that we get to live. even 50% of the time, there's always something happening that's challenging.
Sometimes it's something huge. Sometimes it's something small.
But there's always something. And that's so normal.
But... Depending on how emotionally distraught I am, sometimes it can be impossible for me to get anything done because I'm too...
And it's just too hard to... to push myself when I'm in a place where I'm emotional.
Now, I also have to share the ways that I procrastinate.
Because those are the reasons why I procrastinate.
But I have to tell you all the ways that I procrastinate.
Number one Now, this is the most devious way for me.
No, that's not true. All of them are somewhat devious, but I will do productive chores. that are not timely, that are not even necessarily necessary. in order to procrastinate.
And the reason why this is devious is because I'm convincing myself that I'm doing the right thing. by doing productive chores, I will say this form of procrastination is somewhat rewarding in a way because yes, I am getting other things done.
But at the same time, I can exhaust myself doing chores.
And I can sort of convince myself that I'm doing something that I need to be doing when in reality, There's something else that I need to be completing that will come with negative consequences if I don't complete it.
And I'm sort of tricking myself into thinking, I'm doing the right thing while simultaneously exhausting myself.
Because Doing chores and working on things like that is relatively tiring, you know?
So instead of me procrastinating by taking a nap, which is the next way that I procrastinate, I'm procrastinating by doing something that will exhaust me to a point that I actually won't be able to complete the task.
Thank you. unless I rest first. Do you see what I'm saying?
It's a little devious. It's a little devious thing that my brain does.
And I've been known to like, suddenly start scrubbing the floors to not have to do something that I don't want to do, but that I know I have to do.
I'll do the dishes. And I'll scrub every plate and every fork extra, extra hard. and extra, extra long just so that I don't have to go do the thing I don't want to do.
Like yesterday, I decided I would... cook myself food for the next two days.
I didn't need to do that. You know, I'll go to the grocery store and just walk through the aisles and get nothing. to procrastinate.
Or I'll go out to buy something stupid that I didn't even need.
I'll be like, you know what? I have been craving... sun-dried tomatoes and I don't have those.
So let me go get some sun-dried tomatoes.
I actually really need those. Ooh, I've been really in the mood for...
You know, wasabi. I need to make a sauce with wasabi at some point.
Maybe I should go buy wasabi and find it at the store somewhere.
Like, it's like, no, I don't need that right now.
I don't need to do that right now. But I'll like convince myself that I need to.
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The next way I procrastinate is by taking a nap.
Now, I will say... I'm not sure if this is procrastination because I think if you need a nap, You should take a nap.
Because trying to get work done when you're exhausted is...
It's a nightmare. You actually end up getting more done if you take a nap. honor your tiredness, and then get back to work.
So I don't know if I'd consider this procrastination But there are times when I'm not really tired and I really don't need a nap. but I'll kind of force myself to take a nap.
That's a little bit more like procrastination because But there's a blurred line there because there are times when you really need a nap.
And actually that... step is going to get you closer to finishing your task.
But then there are also times when you don't need a nap and you're not even tired and you're just getting into bed and closing your eyes just to run away from the from the task that you don't want to do.
Now, my least excusable form of procrastination is going on the internet, abusing the internet.
Wow. I am really good at procrastinating this way.
I'll go on Instagram. I'll go on Pinterest.
I'll online shop. Now listen, I don't think there's anything wrong with going on Instagram, going on Pinterest, online shopping in a healthy way because there is a healthy way.
If you got all your work done for the day and you're laying in bed or you're sitting on the couch and you want to go on Instagram, Pinterest, online stores, whatever.
Sure. I don't think that you need to completely cut those things out of your life, but it has to be healthy.
And I will say it's incredibly challenging to have a healthy relationship with your internet usage. using the internet as a way to procrastinate is one of those challenges.
It's so tempting. to just say, you know what?
Let me just give myself 15 minutes. on this online store.
Let me just take 15 minutes. to scroll through social media.
Just give me 15 minutes. Let me just watch one YouTube video.
I'm just going to watch one YouTube video and then I'm going to get to work.
Okay, wait, I'm just gonna... Watch one episode of this show on Hulu.
Okay, then I'm going to get back. You see what I'm saying?
It can be so easy to say, oh, let me just give myself a little bit of this and then I'll get back to work.
It rarely works that way. It can, but rarely.
I think... The problem with procrastinating by using the internet is that A lot of times when you're in a place where you're procrastinating, you're in a place where you're not... emotionally resilient.
When I am in a good place mentally and I'm not stressed out.
Going on social media doesn't really bother me.
Like if I see other people thriving, living their best life, I'm like, rock on.
But when I go on social media and I'm procrastinating, And I see everyone else living their best life and I'm stressed out and I'm procrastinating and I feel bad about myself because I'm not getting shit done. then social media has a really negative impact on me.
Or when... I'm stressed out and I'm procrastinating and I decide to turn on YouTube or turn on a show, a TV show or something.
I'm going to have a harder time turning it off because I'm not as emotionally strong.
I'm somewhat weak you know and my willpower is down.
It's already down. So then... It's even easier for me to get sucked into a show or into YouTube because I'm not resilient.
Or if I'm online shopping, I'm more likely to impulse buy something because I'm again, the willpower is gone.
I already feel kind of bad about myself.
I just want a little dopamine hit. You can online shop and use social media and watch various things. without it being toxic.
I really do think it is possible. But the first step to using the internet in a healthy way is... to check in with yourself first.
What type of headspace am I in right now?
Am I going to get sucked into this? in a bad way because I'm not in a strong mental state.
Yes or no? If the answer is yes, then...
You got to put your foot down and say, you know what?
No, I'm not going to let myself do this.
I need to wait until I'm at the right headspace.
And then I'm going to use the internet. I think the worst part about procrastination is how it makes me feel.
It makes me feel so awful. It's... such a terrible feeling.
It takes a stressful task and makes it even more stressful. because I'm putting it off.
You know, a task can be stressful. But when I decide I'm not going to do it right now, I make it 10 times more stressful because I'm running out of time.
You know? I'm now giving myself less time to complete a task because...
I didn't want to start. And that just makes it worse.
So procrastinating over the course of a period of time makes you more and more stressed out.
You only end up more stressed out when you procrastinate.
It's not like, oh, if I procrastinate, then... the stress will go away.
And then once I'm, Not stressed out anymore.
I can start the task. No, it doesn't work like that.
You just get more stressed out. And it just gets even harder to start the task.
Procrastinating also... makes the rest of life feel like a nightmare.
You can't enjoy anything when you're procrastinating.
For example, let's say I decided instead of getting my work done, I was going to go to the beach.
Well, I'm going to go to the beach and be stressed out, which is not fun, right?
I would much rather... get my work done first, then go to the beach because then I can just be relaxed at the beach.
But no, if I decide to go and do something else. instead of getting my work done, I'm not even going to enjoy the thing that I was trying to use as a distraction.
And it also makes me feel insecure and incapable.
Sometimes I'll procrastinate because I feel insecure and incapable.
But other times I'll procrastinate for a different reason.
And then the feelings of insecurity come later.
They come as a result of the procrastination.
They aren't the reason for the procrastination. shitty feeling that is to feel incapable, to feel insecure, to feel like I can't, complete this task.
I'm not smart enough. I'm not hardworking enough.
I'm not talented enough, etc. What a shitty feeling.
So... I decided to Google why we procrastinate as humans.
Because I do believe that understanding something helps us get better at managing it.
I mentioned that earlier. But I think the first step to managing something is understanding it.
And I had my own suspicions about why we procrastinate. but I wanted to read the facts.
Read the facts on the internet, which, you know...
Listen, I got all this information from the New York Times.
I feel like that's a reliable source. According to the article that I read, we don't procrastinate because we're lazy.
I always thought that procrastination was just rooted in laziness. procrastinating has always made me feel like I'm lazy.
But according to this article, that is not true.
Procrastination is a way of coping with challenging emotions and negative moods induced by certain tasks.
Negative moods, including boredom, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, resentment, self doubt and beyond. we don't procrastinate because we're just simply too lazy. but we procrastinate because there's another layer of emotion there.
There's something preventing us from completing the task that is rooted in our emotions.
This is interesting to me because I never really thought of it that way.
But it's so true. When I actually think about it, It's so true.
It's always rooted in some sort of negative emotion.
This article also says that procrastination is an emotion regulation problem, not a time management problem.
And this is interesting because it actually reminded me of another way that I procrastinate. which is by spending a lot of time scheduling things out.
I will literally procrastinate by organizing my schedule.
And the next thing I know, I'm like color coding everything.
Why? It's like... What am I doing? You know, we can actually procrastinate by trying to schedule our life.
Which, again, it's ironic because it's like we can convince ourselves, oh...
If we organize our schedule and manage our time better, then we won't procrastinate.
But in a way, that in itself is procrastination.
Don't get me wrong, I do think a level of scheduling and organizing is important.
And I definitely do that. And it really helps me stay on track.
But Creating an organized schedule really doesn't take that long.
What? It takes five minutes. We don't need to have 10 different apps on our phone to help us stay on schedule.
We don't need to spend time color coding everything.
I think a lot of that can actually be procrastination in itself.
But procrastination is rooted in negative emotion.
It's kind of all a mind game. It's not like, oh, there's not enough time in the day.
That's why I'm not getting everything done.
That's not that's not it. We procrastinate because there's something emotional happening in our minds.
People procrastinate because of an inability to manage things. negative moods and feelings around a certain task.
Procrastination is about being more focused on the immediate urgency of of managing negative moods than getting on with the task.
So it's sort of like when we're feeling a negative emotion around a task, we have two options.
We can either make ourselves feel better by completing the task or we can make ourselves feel better by procrastinating.
And both give us a sense of relief, but at different times.
When we procrastinate, we get an immediate sense of relief.
We get like an immediate, oh. Don't have to do it right now.
But then long-term, you become more stressed out.
Completing the task despite the desire to procrastinate Doesn't give you immediate relief, but it gives you long-term relief.
And it gives you somewhat permanent relief, at least in regards to that specific task.
You see what I mean? We procrastinate to avoid negative feelings, but then... over the long term, we end up feeling more negative feelings.
And according to this article, there's...
This thing that we as humans have called present bias, which is our hardwired, tendency to prioritize short-term needs ahead of long-term ones so we're sort of wired to choose something that gives us immediate gratification.
But in so many scenarios in life, right path to take is the one that offers delayed gratification.
We almost have to fight against our nature at times in order to do what will lead us to the most long-term success. happiness and fulfillment and stress-free slay, you know?
We also can procrastinate, as I mentioned earlier, because...
We're doubting ourselves. We have low self-esteem.
We have anxiety. We're insecure. when we feel like we're gonna fail, we don't even wanna start the task.
We don't even wanna try to complete the task.
If we believe that we're gonna fail, then we don't see the reason to even start.
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We tend to have negative emotions around procrastination itself.
Like when we feel that we're procrastinating, we tend to feel negative emotions about that.
And ironically, that makes us more stressed out which then makes us procrastinate more.
It's just like... One big vicious cycle, and it's incredibly challenging to break.
But there are ways, okay? And let's discuss those ways.
First, I'm gonna start out by telling you the ways that I personally break the procrastination cycle.
Number one, I reward myself in some way.
I either reward myself before the task or I reward myself after I complete the task.
I think it's more effective to reward yourself after you complete the task.
Because I find that sometimes if you reward yourself before you complete, the task you can then end up rewarding yourself too much.
And then you again are just procrastinating.
But sometimes I'll let myself have a little treat before I start working.
Like I'll give myself... an hour of online shopping.
Not even necessarily buying anything, by the way.
I don't even buy things that much. What I enjoy about online shopping is just browsing.
That's what I adore about it. So I'll give myself an hour of something enjoyable.
And then maybe I'll set a timer for like an hour.
And then once the timer's up, I have to get started with the work.
This works sometimes, but sometimes it doesn't.
I will say, giving myself a reward after tends to work a lot better.
I'll promise myself that when I complete a task...
Maybe I'll order myself some yummy food or...
I'll let myself go get drinks with friends or I'll give myself the next day off.
You know, Some sort of reward. Okay, the next way that I manage procrastination is by... somewhat forcing myself to just get started.
The hardest part is getting started. And you kind of just have to go mind over matter.
And just do it. Even if you're kicking, crying and screaming along the way, just force yourself to just do it. it's not always possible, to be honest.
There are times when I can't just force myself to start.
But if I know I need to get something done, there are times when I can just force myself to start.
And then once I get through that initial challenge of getting started, then it's actually not that bad.
And I realized, okay, You know, I actually can do this.
I also try to focus on how good I'm gonna feel after I complete the task.
I remind myself the relief I'm going to feel.
And I look at that as a reward. What a beautiful day it's going to be once I finish what I need to finish.
What a relief. I also think it's important... to remove all distractions.
I'll put my phone in another room. I'll make a rule.
No more internet usage until I complete this task.
Put all distractions as far away as possible.
This is incredibly helpful because... When things aren't right next to you, easy to grab, you just don't grab for them.
Like when I put my phone in another room, I just will not use my phone to procrastinate.
I just end up not doing that. You know, it's when it's right there, right next to me that I use it to procrastinate So I think removing all distractions, whether it's through making rules for yourself or it's through physically removing distractions, that can be incredibly helpful.
Next, I like to make a plan. When looking at a big, daunting task from a bird's eye view, it can just look impossible.
You can just feel like, oh, this is so daunting.
This is So much, I just, there's no way I can handle it.
But if you zoom in a little bit and break down the daunting task into pieces. you'll realize, oh, this big daunting task is actually just a bunch of small tasks that put together and the individual small tasks are much less daunting.
So if you can sort of zoom into this big daunting task, break it down into smaller tasks and then make a plan to organize how you're going to complete the task, it can just make it feel better.
But sometimes what I really need to do is just take the pressure off.
I don't necessarily work well under pressure.
I mean it depends, but for the most part I don't work well under pressure.
And sometimes all I need to do to get a task done is to push the deadline.
And you know what's funny? A lot of times when I push the deadline for something, I end up actually completing it on time.
Like... I end up completing it on time to honor that original deadline.
But just simply removing the pressure by changing the deadline can completely change my mindset because psychologically, I don't feel... paralyzed by the pressure.
But more than anything, it gives me the time to... rest, make a plan, mentally prepare, and work at my leisure.
And that's, Very helpful sometimes. And last but not least, sometimes I'll romanticize the task.
I'll light some candles. I'll get into comfy PJs.
I'll make myself a coffee. I'll make myself a little... snack, you know, and I'll try to make the experience romantic.
This doesn't always help, but sometimes it can, you know?
Maybe I'll play soft music that I like. You know, it can help.
So those are the ways that I've been fighting procrastination for... years now, but I did decide to Google it because I wanted to see if there was some other tactics that I haven't tried yet.
And I did find a few. Thank you to the New York Times once again for basically doing all the hard work for me.
Something that I have not done very well is forgive myself for procrastinating.
This article says, forgiving yourself allows you to be productive because...
It allows you to move past your negligent behavior. and focus on the upcoming project without the burden of past procrastination.
It just allows you to move forward forgive yourself and just get the shit done.
Because when you get all wrapped up and feeling bad about yourself, because you procrastinated, you just end up procrastinating more and getting less done.
If you can just decide to forgive yourself and say, you know what?
It's okay. I'm just going to get it done now. then you'll just end up getting it done.
On that note, this article also said, having compassion for yourself can be incredibly beneficial. kindness and understanding in the face of our mistakes and failures. can help decrease psychological distress, which causes procrastination. and also can help boost motivation, enhance feelings of self-worth,
And help to develop positive emotions like optimism, wisdom, curiosity. and personal initiative.
When we look at ourselves in a fair way.
And we sort of treat ourselves gently. And with love, we're just naturally put in a better headspace to be able to complete challenging tasks.
So much distress is relieved when you have compassion for yourself.
And that can help you get some shit done.
The article also recommends mindfulness. to sort of look inward and ask yourself why you're procrastinating. and simply the awareness Just being aware of why you're procrastinating. can help you sort of make a plan to then complete the task.
And last but not least, make it as easy as possible to complete the task that you don't want to do.
For example, if you know that you need to study in the mornings before school, because maybe there's exams coming up, whatever.
If you know that you need to study before the school day starts, Make it easy for yourself by... laying out all your study materials the night before, laying out all your clothes the night before for school, making breakfast for yourself the night before.
Make the morning as easy as possible so that Getting some studying in before school starts is even easier.
Or let's say you have a task that you need to complete for work.
Let's say there's like a handful of things that you need to do before you even start. you need to write a few emails or something or start working on a presentation deck or something.
Like you need to... Send all those emails, set up the presentation deck and all of that.
First, get that done as soon as possible.
So that when you really sit down to start working on it, you can just get right into it.
Make it as easy as possible to complete the task that you don't want to do.
Okay, you guys, I'm done. That's it. I think the fight against procrastination is ongoing.
I don't think... will ever be fully relieved from that.
I think... The struggle continues for the rest of our lives, but we can continue to get better at managing it.
And it's something that I want to work on because to be honest, procrastination causes me a lot of distress in my life.
And I really... don't like feeling stressed.
Okay. I exist. I don't like being stressed out.
Who does? That's all I have for today. Thank you for listening.
Thank you for hanging out. Hopefully there was something of value. in this conversation today for you.
If you like Anything Goes, subscribe to Anything Goes.
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Check out my coffee company. chamberlaincoffee.com.
If you want to pick up coffee, tea, mugs, tumbler cups, straws whatever your heart desires use code AG15 for a little discount I really appreciate you spending your time with me today.
It is... Always such a pleasure. And I just love and appreciate all of you.
And I will talk to you very soon have an incredible rest of your day.
Okay, and if you're procrastinating by listening to this podcast episode right now, Turn it off, turn it off and get it done.
You got this. As if that's helpful. Me saying, you got this?
What am I, a fucking soccer coach? Anyway.
Talk to you later. Love you. The game is on.
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