Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners, Peter here, and I'm back with another pair of Peter's Picks.
That's right. Once again, I'm here to choose two of my favorite stories from the Story Pirates archives.
And today's selections are something special, as they involve two of my favorite things, TV and butter.
A whole lot of butter.
Peter's Picks are coming up after a few words for the grown -ups.
I'm very different from everybody.
Confusion is the step before curiosity.
Okay, that's a really funny idea.
We have to send that in.
I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling.
I believe all the things in my story.
human beings are just able to create The Zoli Pirates Welcome back to Peter's Picks My first pick comes from all the way back in season 3 and it's a story called Family Room Wars Now, have you ever fought with somebody over control of the remote control for the TV?
It can be a real battle especially between siblings and cousins for that That control of the remote.
And that battle can get intense, real intense.
You know, when I was growing up, we didn't have shows on demand.
You had to watch the show when it was on, which meant whoever had control of the remote had real power.
The author of this story really understood that feeling.
They took it to a whole new level, and so did we.
I love this story, and I think you will too.
And here's the author to introduce it.
Hi, my name is Jackson.
I'm 12 years old, and I live in Utah.
This is my story. It's called Family Room Wars.
Yes. That's exactly the word. I bet they're getting along great.
You're probably right.
I'm sure there's nothing to worry about.
Cousin Bill, I bring news.
Silence, Cousin Jim.
Can you not see we have yet to reach a commercial break?
Yes, but... And is it not said that whoever holds the remote is king of the family room?
It is so, my liege.
However, I bring word from the other siblings and cousins.
They have invoked a meeting of the family room clans But there hasn't been an official meeting of the clans Since the great labor day cookout of 2012 You can only mean one thing They mean to usurp me My lord, fear not The largest of them is not yet in fifth grade They have not the strength to remove you from the throne of blankets Of course you are right Let them come!
Assemble the clans!
My liege, I present the Couch Potato clan!
Yeah! And their leader, Cousin Larry Cottonwood!
Ah, Larry, how goes lacrosse?
My mother tells me you made the travelling team this year.
Spare me your small talk, Cousin Bill.
Or should I say, Bill the unjust movie picker.
I will tolerate your insolence only because our mothers are sisters And because you sent me those cool snap bracelets for my bar mitzvah But watch your tongue, or I will change the channel to a documentary You wouldn't dare Try me, I'm in middle school now And am developing a taste for non -fiction Gentlemen, please Next, I present the Slacker Clan and their supreme leader cousin meh hey hello cousin um i see you got your braces off that's gotta be exciting it's okay why do you slackers even show up you never seem to care what movie we -we -we watch uh you know honestly i uh you know whatever and from the gamer
clan cousin beep beep boop yeah beep beep boop in the house what's up guys ah yes cousin beep i think we all know what you do if you had the remote play video games and not give anyone else a turn come on we could do multiplayer?
And from the Movers clan, I present your little sister, Zigzag.
Hey, Big Brother! Sis, can't you and your clan just sit still while we're watching the movie?
You're constantly moving and it's crazy distracting.
Mom says I'm a tactile learner.
I gotta move! Oh, whatever.
And finally, I present the leader of the Sleeper clan, Troopy, the Passer -Outer.
Huh? What? Was I asleep?
What did I miss in the movie?
Who's that guy? I'll make it off the island.
Did I miss lunch? Go back to sleep, Uncle Drew.
Now that we are all met, I have but one question.
Who called this gathering?
Twas I, Larry Cottonwood, dear cousin.
For this is a rebellion.
We mean to take back that remote in the greatest form of family room combat.
A pillow fight. My liege, be wary of your glasses.
Very well. If it must be war, then let's get on with it.
Breakfast is soon, and I hear mom's making waffles.
Jim, bring me my secret weapon.
You can't mean... That's right.
Dad's memory foam pillow.
It never forgets. Just remember, cousin Larry.
Because of you, we are all missing the movie.
Couch potatoes, hear my battle cry.
Screen time! Support jockeying!
Out of my way, Jim!
I will not move! Then you'll face the wrath of my pillow!
Oh, the kingdom! Face it!
You'll never defeat me!
The remote is mine!
What remote? What remote?
The remote for the TV!
Which one? The remote in my hand!
Right here! George, now!
Nick, pillow, boomerang, ha!
The remote? He dropped the remote!
What is going on in here?
It is the mighty mum, stopper of wars.
Okay, everyone out.
Breakfast is ready.
No more screen time.
Now come on, I made waffles.
it uncle drew what what happened i thought you were watching them watching who what oh look the what about it it's the end we'll be back with another of my picks right after a few words for the grown -ups you chose to hit play on this podcast today smart choice progressive loves loves to help people make smart choices.
That's why they offer a tool called AutoQuote Explorer that allows you to compare your progressive car insurance quote with rates from other companies.
So you save time on the research and can enjoy savings when you choose the best rate for you.
Give it a try after this episode at Progressive .com.
Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates.
Not available in all states or situations.
Prices vary based on how you buy.
this episode is sponsored by sitter city hey grown -ups have you ever found yourself really in need of a sitter but you don't know where to look you already texted everyone you know and looking online can be just kind of overwhelming i know when i first became a parent i didn't even know where to start with finding a sitter and i really could have used a service like Sitter City.
They have sitters that fit your family, sitters that you can trust, and sitters that kids really like.
It's important to me that sitters know about child development and that they engage with kids using creative play.
And at Sitter City, they really emphasize all of that.
When you open Sitter City, you just know you're going to find someone solid, complete with references and all sorts of impressive credentials.
Find a sitter that's perfect for your family at sinnercity .com Welcome back!
My second pick comes to us from Season 5 and it is a story called Now We're Cookin' With Butter I loved this story so much when I first read it the joke was clear, the absurdity was high and the amount of butter was unbelievable This author wrote an incredible absurd cooking game show in which which the only ingredient is, well, I don't want to give it away, but you'll never guess.
You'll never guess what the secret ingredient is.
Sit back, relax, and enjoy.
Now we're cooking with butter.
Hi, my name is Oliver.
I'm 10 years old. I live in Pennsylvania, and this is my story.
Now we're cooking with butter.
We couldn't think of a concept for a show that could be better, so here it is.
is now we're cooking with butter show hello all you butter lovers out there and welcome back to now we're cooking with butter show the show where we just use butter before we meet this week's contestants let's say hello to our judges judge number one tell us what are you hoping to see today well host I'm hoping our contestants just use butter well that is the only requirement so so here's hoping.
Let's say hello to our next judge, Judge Number 2.
What will you be looking for from our contestants today?
I'm mainly going to be judging their dishes based on whether or not they're made of butter.
Makes sense. And finally, our third and final judge, La La La La, the singing one.
I'm hoping to see lots of butter, yeah.
Ha ha ha. Oh, me too, La La La La, me too.
All right, now it's time to bring out this week's contestants.
As always, they have no idea what they're doing here, but they're about to find out.
Let's bring out our chefs, Mark and Rachel!
Whoa, whoa, what's happening?
Is this a game show?
I have the same questions.
Welcome, chefs, to Now We're Cooking With Butter Show.
Today, you will be preparing a unique dish for our panel of judges.
Oh, uh, well, I am a chef, so, uh, this should be fun.
Yeah, what a relief.
The only rule is that you have to use butter.
That shouldn't be hard. I use butter in pretty much everything.
Me, too. In fact...
And nothing else. I'm sorry, what?
You have five minutes to complete your dish.
Did you say only butter?
We'll be right back.
Do you love butter?
Butter. Then you'll love butter.
But how does it butter?
It's easy. It's butter.
I butter... Try some.
Butter! Butter! You're eating butter.
That's the butter. Butter!
It's butter. Butter, it's butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter.
It's butter. Butter.
And welcome back to Now We're Cooking With Butter.
Show! Let's check in with our contestants.
Mark, how is your dish coming along?
Well, I've only been given a few minutes to think, and I'm not sure if I really have an idea.
Ooh, that buzzer means that time is up.
What? Mark, please present your dish.
to the judges. Uh, okay.
Uh, so I made a butter soup with butter vegetables.
Which is simply a bowl of melted butter next to some butter shaped like vegetables.
Dude, I like all this butter texture.
Yes, I know. All I had was butter.
Hmm. Nice butter flavor, Mark.
Again, all that I had to use in my fridge was butter.
Yum, this is really good!
La la la la la la la butter!
Okay, I gotta say, this is getting pretty annoying.
Like, literally, all you guys talk about is butter well it certainly is butter next let's check in with our other contestants Rachel Rachel please present your dish for the judges uh okay I made butter cupcakes with butter sprinkles which is just rounded blocks of butter with cold butter shavings on top so it's butter mm -hmm nice going with that butter flavor Wow all I had at my station was butter texture on the the other hand i'm joking it's great butter texture you know my station was only supplied with butter right these cupcakes are really sugary amadonamine buttery la la la again same thing
as that mark guy all i had was butter all right before we find out our scores let's take another commercial break we'll be right butter am i losing my mind in a world of butter butter butter butter a butter will rise butter butter butter to defend butter butter butter with butter oh butter butter from butter butter productions it's butter the butterer oh coming to a butter near you rated butter for butter Butter!
Butter. And welcome back to Now we're Cookin' with Butter...
show. What is going on?
Stop saying butter!
Contestants, now it's time to find out your scores.
La la la la, will you please tell us what was Mark's score?
25 .6 out of 30 I don't Oh, that actually sounds pretty good And tell us, what was Rachel's score?
24 .4 out of 30 Oh, I'm sorry, Rachel Butter luck next time It was just butter Well, folks, we've reached the end of the show Okay, this is outrageous I demand that you let us go I still don't know how we got here But we've had enough And as always, both of our two contestants will receive a fantastic prize.
Oh, yeah. Let me guess.
Butter? Yeah. $2 ,500.
Yeah, that's what I...
Wait, what? Until next time, this has been Now We're Cooking With Butter...
Show. Butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter, butter.
Good butter, everybody.
Butter! Butter! Butter!
Butter! The end. Butter!
Butter. thanks for listening to peter's picks and a big thanks to today's authors jackson and oliver we'll be back later in the week with another brand new episode until then stay creative and stay kind you
