Let's have a look at an interaction that I know you probably feel nervous about, which is asking somebody to go for lunch or have a coffee in a professional context.
I'm going to share with you all the phrases you'll ever need so you can feel more confident.
Let's crack on, then shall we?
Hello and welcome back to Confident Business English.
You're here with me, Anna, your neuro -language coach. So, the inspiration for this episode comes from one of my clients, and this person has to both travel around the world to different branches of their company, and catch up with internal colleagues, but also go to different conferences and summits where they meet people from across the industry that maybe they see once a year or twice a year, they were talking to me about this and they said, you know, I really want to get better at making conversation.
We started laying out the fundamentals and role -playing some scenarios and I found that they got stuck on one specific part that I've seen many, many times, which is just asking people to go for a coffee or inviting them to go for lunch. And I think across the board, this is just one area that we kind of overlook and we don't really think about.
And then when it comes to the moment, we're like, oh, actually I don't really know what to say.
That means that you lack some confidence in that interaction and you might feel nervous about asking the other person.
So I thought that's it, I'm doing an episode only dedicated to this.
And I hope by the end, you will feel more confident and know just some set phrases that you can use time and time again.
Let's get these more basic things on autopilot and you can spend more energy on the more difficult part, which is having the conversation.
Right. First then I'm going to show you three questions that you can use in different scenarios to invite somebody for coffee or lunch. Then I'm going to go through some different responses because I think that's also important.
And also if you do go for the coffee or the lunch, how to discuss paying, because that can also be a little bit awkward, right?
Your first question then is, would you like?
Would you like to get a coffee?
The second one is, shall we?
Shall we get a coffee before the meeting?
Thirdly, are you free?
Are you free for a coffee before the meeting?
What's the difference between these structures?
Would you like is definitely your polite and professional option.
This is best for people you don't know very well.
It could be an executive, it could be somebody in a different company that you don't know very well, or just somebody that you meet at a conference and you'd like to get to know them a little bit better.
In that case, would you like is the best option.
Here are some examples and practice out loud with me.
Would you like to get a coffee before the meeting?
Would you like to get a coffee at some point this week?
Would you like to get a coffee later?
You of course can add any time reference there.
At some point is a really nice one to sort of say an unspecific time in the future.
Would you like to get a coffee at some point this week, at some point today for example?
Let's look at some sentences with lunch and you can repeat after me.
Would you like to get lunch before the meeting?
Would you like to go for lunch in the break?
Would you like to meet up for lunch tomorrow?
If you want to sound as natural as possible the first thing is that connected speech. Would you?
Would you like to get a coffee?
Moving on to your second question, imagine that you are visiting the New York office and you are working with people that you know very well, and you just want to make a suggestion that you get a coffee.
In this case, if it's somebody you know quite well and you're familiar with, shall is a beautiful option.
We can think about shall as more of a suggestion and would you like as more of an invitation which is more appropriate when you don't know somebody very well.
Don't get me wrong, I would understand if you ask me both of these questions but I'm just trying to you what's the better fit.
Here's some examples that you can try right now.
Shall we get a coffee before the meeting?
Shall we grab a quick coffee before we start?
Shall we get some lunch at some point?
Shall we have lunch tomorrow before I head back?
To head back just means to go back.
So if I'm saying before I head back, it just means before I go back to the head office, or before I go back to Madrid or Paris or Rome, wherever you are based.
Last but not least, your final sentence is are you free for.
Are you free for a coffee before the meeting?
Even though this could work with any of the groups that I've said before, and certainly would be understandable, I think it's really the best fit for internal people that you know very, very well, people on a team that you're working closely with, and you want to make sure that they're available.
If it's somebody we don't know very well, asking them that more open invitation of would you like, is I think more appropriate in that context.
But again, you could use any of these questions.
I'm just trying to give you some clear boundaries and make your life a little bit easier.
Here are some sentences that you can use with Are You Free?
Are you free for a coffee before the meeting?
There are just a few things I'd to go over?
Are you free for lunch tomorrow?
I just wanted to speak to you about something.
Are you free for a coffee later?
It would be great to catch up actually.
Those are your three questions then.
Would you like for somebody that you know very well, or when you need to be more formal.
Shall we for people that you do know, but you wanna make more of a suggestion, and then finally, are you free for when you are working closely with people, but you wanna just double check if they're available.
What's the follow up then, because imagine they say, oh, yeah, that sounds great.
And then you're like, oh, um, what do I say next?
Perfect questions you can ask next are when works for you or what time works for you?
And then they'll say something like, oh, well, maybe 11 o 'clock.
And you say, perfect, that's great.
Where should we meet?
Where shall we meet?
Shall we meet at reception?
Shall we meet in my office?
Shall we meet downstairs?
So this is you suggesting a meeting point, which I think is important actually these questions because you don't really think about it until you actually have to do it.
Then you're like, oh yeah, I have to suggest where we meet.
This is what came up with my client when we were practicing it as well.
Then imagine, actually they say, no, maybe they're really busy and they're like, ah, I'm really sorry, but I can't today or I'm heading back this afternoon so I won't have time.
What would be a natural thing to say there?
I would just say, okay, great, no worries.
Hopefully see you around.
That's a really nice one.
If it's somebody at a conference that you don't know very well, see you around.
It's just kind of this general term saying, see you at some point somewhere.
If you're going to see that person later, you could say, okay, no worries.
See you, see you later on.
Or if you want to be a little bit more casual, you could just say no worries, another time.
Let's finish up finally talking about paying because this is the awkward part, right?
When you invite somebody for a coffee, you don't necessarily have the conversation before saying, don't worry, I'll pay for it.
And it can be a little bit awkward at the end, right?
Maybe you're at the bar or you're at the table, the waiter brings the bill, or maybe they go to get their card out of the pocket and you're like, no, no worries.
I'll get it. I'll get it.
Just means I'll pay for it.
Or another way that you could say it is, no, no, no, no worries.
This one, this one's on me.
This one's on me. There we go then, that brings us to the end of the episode.
And this is the thing.
If you learn those phrases, you can get it on autopilot and you don't have to worry about it anymore.
It doesn't have to be awkward anymore.
And you can ask everybody for coffee's and invite everybody for lunch without feeling nervous.
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Thank you so much as always for squeezing in this session into your very busy day.
I'm sure, and I look forward to speaking to you again next week.
Bye.