Hey guys, it's Syd and welcome back.
I feel like I haven't been this excited to film a video in a while.
Not that I don't love filming, because I obviously love vlogging but this is a video in specific that I've been wanting to do for a very long time.
Basically, as you can already tell by the title, I'm going to be sharing some of my tips and really just my life experiences on how you can really become more confident in yourself.
This is something that i have really worked on and i'm honestly really proud of myself with how far i've come with it.
I will say i am nowhere near perfect.
I have my bad days where i feel insecure, just like everyone else, but i feel like growing up online since i was like 15 years old.
I'm 22 now.
I have learned some things along the way.
I'm basically taking the approach of making a video to almost my younger self, like my 17 year old self, some things that i would have instilled in her, And I see a lot of you guys as like my sisters, my younger sisters.
I think confidence is a journey.
Like you're never really there and you've never really made it.
I am no expert.
Let's get that straight.
This is just my personal tips of my personal experience.
Hopefully you can take something from this.
One of the most important things I've found is taking care of yourself.
You guys know I've talked about it a lot.
I've kind of been on a journey with taking care of myself.
I definitely went through periods where I really neglected my health, and this can come both physically and mentally.
Physically taking care of yourself will be like feeding yourself things that make you feel good, treating yourself well, like doing a spa day or going to your favorite workout class.
Just whatever makes you feel good physically.
I believe that actually really translates and shows on the outside.
That was something that i definitely struggled with.
You guys know i went through a pretty bad eating disorder last year.
I was probably at one of my lowest confidence points at that time.
I wasn't making time for myself to eat, i wasn't putting myself first And that ended up catching up to me.
The next thing I have, this is more of a day-to-day thing.
It's presenting yourself and preparing yourself for the day.
Whatever that means to you.
I find even if I'm running errands, I'm like not seeing anyone that day.
Or if I'm just like staying in my room all day.
Sometimes I'll just like throw on a little concealer.
A really cute sweat set.
No one's gonna see me and I know that, but that's like not the point.
The point is really just to make me feel better for the day ahead by getting a little bit ready, throwing on some gold hoop earrings.
It makes me more productive.
It makes me feel just like I got ready.
There are days when I will wear to class what I wore to bed, like pajamas, but I always feel better when I put a little bit of effort in for no one but myself.
Something I think truly speaks volumes about your confidence to other people is your posture.
When you're walking into maybe, a situation you're nervous about, just like reminding yourself to present yourself in like a confident way.
Even if you don't believe it, fake it till you make it.
It kind of tricks your brain over time.
Confidence is sometimes quiet.
You don't always see it.
Some of the most confident people i've seen really just have like the best posture and poise and i can really pick up on it without them even speaking a word, just how they present themselves like so calmly.
This next one i talk about a lot.
I always say how much i love to do things alone and sometimes it's concerning like sydney, do you have friends?
Yes, i do, I actually do okay.
Being your own best friend is so important.
It really just teaches you detachment.
And I know that kind of comes from like a fear-based lack of trust thing in relationships which I do have.
I'm going to admit, but I do think it's just healthy regardless.
Being able to be independent emotionally is just.
It's something that's really hard and it takes a lot of work sometimes, but I know how to have a good time with myself.
And there's just something about that that's really empowering.
And if it's like scary for you to maybe like go out to eat by yourself or like go to the movies by yourself, try it.
And I promise it gets easier if that's something that makes you nervous.
And it's a good thing to do.
Exposure therapy if doing something that makes you nervous.
It's something that I actually kind of started to treat like a relationship.
So sometimes I deliberately allot a night a week to go out to dinner with myself.
Having that time set aside for yourself is important because, if you think about it, when you foster a relationship with someone, you do need to spend time with just them alone.
It's also important to foster that same relationship with yourself.
If you kind of struggle with where to start in terms of building confidence and trusting yourself, I think one of the easiest things to do is literally sit down in a room, close your eyes and envision the ideal version of yourself.
This is something I've heard like time and time again and I really didn't start doing it until recently.
Visualizing things really can be a form of manifesting for yourself.
Even as simple as like making a pinterest board on what you want your future to look like is a really good way to like visually.
See that.
If you watched my video recently, i even made a physical vision board for myself.
I do think this is also probably the most crucial and difficult situations.
Maybe you're in a pressing situation or like an argument with somebody, a breakup, and your emotions take over and you really want to handle something a certain way.
That might not be the best.
Taking a step back, taking a deep breath and thinking about how the highest version of yourself would handle the situation really has helped me in those times where maybe I want to do something that I shouldn't do.
One of the biggest things that has helped me with my confidence since I was like 18 is really pushing myself.
This can be in so many ways, whatever way you want to push yourself in.
And it doesn't have to be in like an aggressive, scary way, doing something that you just really don't want to do.
But for example, when I was 18, a lot of you guys know, I moved from Minnesota to LA.
Moving to a big city like LA, like all by myself, I had my own apartment, was not easy.
I obviously made the decision like safely reckless decision i was making.
But at the end of the day it was something i knew deep down i wanted.
But i did have to push myself a little bit to do that and it was hard, it was scary, but i think it was so worth it.
That has really helped with my confidence because now i can look back whenever i'm in a hard position and be like i did that.
So i think i can do this next challenge that i'm nervous to do.
So whatever that means to you, pushing yourself a little bit can sometimes be really good for yourself and confidence building.
The next thing I have is to set goals for yourself and achieve them.
These don't have to be crazy goals.
These don't have to be like get your dream job in one year from now.
It can be as simple as reading a book a month.
It's really just a commitment to yourself and then showing yourself that you can follow through on that commitment and, if you think about it, that's a way that we build trust with other people and like friendships in our lives.
Like over time, you become closer with the person because you maintain commitments with them.
That's how a lot of relationships are fostered.
So by doing that with yourself, you're really just trusting yourself more, and that also helps with like making decisions in your life, being more confident in your choices, and i always feel the most confident myself when have goals and i'm actively achieving them.
The next is also so important i feel like i'm saying this about all of them.
It's having positive and deliberate relationships in your life, and i'm not saying you have to like go out and interview people that's actually concerning but really just taking a step back sometimes and analyzing your relationships can be eye-opening.
At the end of the day, you are who you surround yourself with, and i see that so often.
I also think having like a mentor or just someone you can look up to.
I would say I have two or three people like this in my life that are a bit older than me, and I go to them for advice.
They've lived longer than me and they always try to steer me in the right direction.
And at the end of the day, just being with people who make you feel better about yourself.
How you feel after hanging out with someone is a huge indicator of if it's a healthy relationship or friendship or not.
This kind of segues into my next point, which is creating boundaries and sticking to them.
I think it's important for everyone to have like a set list of boundaries in their life for whatever it is, if it's like for friendships relationships, about things that you will and won't accept.
For me.
Something I've definitely had to reestablish for myself is that I won't take disrespect from anyone.
So sometimes having those boundaries and if you need to reinforce them with people and maybe cut someone off if they're not respecting them, then that's just you protecting yourself.
Next up, sit down and create a list of things that you love about yourself.
This might seem a little bit self-centered, but it's not.
I feel like we live in a society where we can't even love ourselves sometimes.
It's looked at as like egotistical.
I think that's crazy.
I think you need to love yourself first.
So sit down, write your favorite things about yourself and really just acknowledge the things that you love about yourself, things that are unique to yourself, that you bring to the table.
If I'm like kind of going through it and I'm just not feeling confident, I will sometimes just look in the mirror and say things like positive affirmations like you are strong, you are confident.
And even if I don't believe it in the moment which usually I don't in those points it really does something subconsciously.
And repeating that, doing that over and over,
I'm telling you, if you do that every day for a month, you will notice some type of difference.
Sometimes it's fake it till you make it.
There are signs behind it.
The last thing I have is to explore your interests and find things that you like to do.
A new hobby, an activity you've been wanting to try for a while.
For me personally, I love piano.
I'm not the best at it.
I can't even read notes anymore.
Like it's actually kind of sad.
I've also been into painting, you guys know.
I'm not good at that either, but that's not the point.
Try like a new class or something that you've been wanting to try.
What did I do recently?
Me and my friend Jake did this trapezing class a while ago and it was something that we talked about for a while and it was so fun and it literally made sense to no one but us.
But doing things that you've been wanting to try, things that are fun for you.
I think it's super important.
It's just another way to kind of find out more about yourself.
Discover yourself, discovering your passions, your hobbies, things that you enjoy.
That is everything that I have for today's video.
Even if you took away one thing from this, that's all I hope for.
It might seem online maybe your favorite celebrities or influencers or people at your school, as in like everybody has it together.
There's just some confident people that are just simply confident and i can't have that or i cannot become that confident, but that could not be further from the truth.
Even the most confident people have days where they're not confident and have insecurities.
Everybody has them and i think beyond social media can really make it difficult to see that people have insecurities because people never show them.
Also, i do believe confidence is something that you can work on.
I think anyone can improve their confidence if you put in the effort and the work and try.
It's really just about loving yourself.
It's a journey.
No one, no one, will ever have it all together.
That's me.
I don't have it all together, obviously.
These are just some things that have helped me and some things that i think might help some of you guys, but i love you guys.
I hope you enjoyed this little heart-to-heart girls chat And guys sorry and you guys watching me.
Love you guys.
Love you guys and I'll see you in my next video.
Bye guys.
