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Do you like learning English from podcasts?
I bet you do, and I bet you've heard of this podcast before or, if you haven't, you should check it out, and today we're going to use a clip to learn how to understand fast English.
This podcast is the Mel Robbins podcast.
If you haven't heard of it, she's a motivational speaker.
She's not for everyone.
She's very blunt.
She's very just like, get up and go do what you need to do.
But to me, I find that motivating.
Some people don't.
And in this episode, she's talking to a woman named Dr. Meg Jay.
In this podcast, these two women are talking about advice for people in their 20s.
Although I am no longer in my 20s, I do find this podcast really interesting, just as advice to young people or, if you have children, give advice to them or prepare them for this decade of their life, because it's so important.
And it's just interesting thinking about different responsibilities and different mistakes that maybe you've made in the past.
Let's get started listening to some clips and we'll break down the phrases that can help you understand fast English.
We say, oh, your 20s, these are going to be the most carefree years of your life.
Empirically not true.
We'll talk more about that.
The truth is, your 20s are the most defining decade of adulthood and also, in many ways, the most difficult decade in adulthood.
The reason for that is it's a time of a lot of firsts and a lot of worsts.
You have your first and worst job, your first and worst relationships, your first and worst breakups.
It's a very, very tricky time.
And I think older adults often look at 20-somethings and they think, oh, they don't have partners or houses or mortgages or kids.
You know, what do they have to feel so stressed out about?
But I think what they don't realize is that it's stressful not to have those things and, even more importantly, not to know if you ever will.
In this first clip, Dr. J is saying first and worse, first and worse.
Now, this isn't a classic English phrase or anything, but a lot of times English speakers will come up with phrases like this, or just ways to say something that is rhyming, so that it's really catchy and they can say it quickly in conversation.
So Dr Meg Jay here is.
She's trying to talk about how some of your first relationships, jobs and breakups are actually your worst, you know, because when you're trying out something new and these big life things, they can be kind of bad and painful.
So you might say her first job was her worst job, or being in your 20s can have a lot of firsts and worse.
Let's keep going now in this clip.
Oh, my gosh.
As a parent, you just made me feel sad.
Aw, it's hard.
It's hard to be a 20-something, yeah.
Well, because I have been guilty of saying, well, you don't have kids.
You know what?
You can figure it out.
You can try anything.
The world's your oyster.
Go do what you want.
Like, what are you all worked up about?
Like, da-da-da-da-da-da.
But I'd never really stopped to think about the fear that you might not have those things that you wanted or you might not be able to figure it out.
Right.
If you have never heard this phrase, it's very common.
It's a must-know.
The phrase is, the world is your oyster.
We say this a lot to kids or to young adults, meaning they just have any opportunity that they want to take.
The world is your oyster.
It's a really strange idiom, and I don't even quite understand the origin.
But all you need to know is, when you hear this, it just means you have a lot of opportunities or possibilities for things to happen.
And it's a very positive phrase.
Oftentimes, when people graduate from high school or college, we tell them that the world is their oyster meaning.
Since they have succeeded this far, they can do many positive things with their life.
Another phrase from this clip is worked up.
Worked up.
Instead of saying someone is upset or angry, it's really common to say they're worked up.
They're kind of stressed out or emotional.
You can say to someone, hey, don't get worked up over this.
This just means don't get emotional or angry or upset over it.
And oftentimes this is used in really common fast English and really casual English.
Let's move on.
What's interesting is if you've had a child that has gone off to college or gone into the military or gone to a trade school especially if they leave home there's this assumption that they're maturing and they're gaining those skills and that by the time they get out of college or trade school or the military okay, they got it all figured out.
And what you're making me realize is, wait a minute.
Those are life skills that you don't just stumble upon.
Right.
You have to have experiences or people in your life that teach you those life skills.
Right.
Experiences, usually.
In this part of the podcast, the phrase figure it out.
Figure it out is used so frequently.
It's repeated a lot.
So this phrase to figure something out means to solve a problem or have clarity in a situation, or figure out what to do, which is such a common theme when it comes to people who are in their 20s.
So in this clip you know Dr J, she's talking about how people need to start figuring it out or they need to have it all figured out.
So maybe if you say that someone's starting to figure something out, it means they're kind of trying to see what they should do in life.
Or they're kind of coming up with a plan, but they're not actually doing it yet.
And if you say, I have it all figured out, it means you've already done the plan.
You already have things completely clear in your mind.
Let's move on with more of this podcast clip.
So what do you want to say to someone who is in their 20s and who's saying well, I'll just figure this out later?
I don't figure this out right now.
I got plenty of time.
You know, I think the first thing I would actually not say it would be a question I would ask what are they waiting for?
That I think 20-somethings feel like they have time to figure it out, without maybe fully understanding it takes time to figure it out.
So the sooner you start that process, the better.
If you try to start figuring everything out in your 30s, you're probably going to be pretty crunched for time.
You may not get everything you want.
I don't want that to happen, which is why in the defining decade I don't say you have to have it all figured out by 30.
I say, please start figuring it out by 30.
I love that distinction.
The distinction of oh you know, I have time to figure it out versus it takes time to figure it out.
And so when you're talking to somebody in their 20s, How do you counsel somebody who is freaking out about the fact that they don't have it all figured out?
I would definitely say that more informal phrases are used when English speakers are speaking quickly or, as an English learner, you feel like they're speaking quickly because you're having to process so many slang phrases or so many informal phrases that you don't typically hear or that you haven't learned in introductory English.
Let's talk about two of the phrases that were in this clip.
So the first one is crunched for time, crunched for time.
If someone is crunched for time, it means they are short on time.
They feel like they are in a rush because time is about to run out.
Oftentimes there's some sort of pressure when you feel like you're crunched for time.
If you're taking a test in a classroom, You might feel like you're crunched for time because it's taking you so long to read through the questions and there might be a time limit.
This is a very literal crunch for time.
In life.
A lot of people feel like they are crunched for time when it comes to starting their family, because they feel like they need to build up their career before they can start their family.
But also, if you wait too long, then it can be hard to have children medically.
So this phrase is used in a very like broad sense in life.
You feel like you're crunched for time or, in a very specific sense, like hey, I don't have time to meet today.
I'm crunched for time.
So it can be very literal like I'm running out of time in the day.
Another phrase that's used in casual English is freaking out, freaking out.
If you say that you are freaking out, it means you're panicking.
I'm freaking out right now.
Or just you're losing control emotionally, like, oh, she is freaking out over there.
That means, you know, she's kind of hysterical or very emotional.
And we can use this in a more casual, subdued way, like I was freaking out before I had to have that job interview.
It doesn't mean like you were literally outwardly panicking, but in your head you were probably nervous.
Or, you know, if someone has a big freak out, it can mean they are literally yelling and screaming.
How do you counsel somebody who is freaking out about the fact that they don't have it all figured out?
And now I start to feel anxious that I don't have it figured out.
Now I'm paralyzed by that.
And so when somebody feels paralyzed, they don't do anything, which means they're not figuring it out.
So how do you counsel somebody to flip from that state of kind of paralysis to?
It takes time to figure it out.
And my point is you need to start getting serious about figuring it out.
If we say that someone is paralyzed, this is a medical term that means that they cannot move.
Some people are paralyzed from the neck down so they can't move their hands or their legs, or their arms for that matter.
And This isn't always used in the medical way.
If you say that someone is paralyzed by fear or by anything, it just means that they can't make any action.
They're not doing anything that's productive.
So if you're very overwhelmed, you feel like nervous about everything stressed out and you just feel like you can't make a decision or do anything, we would say that you're paralyzed by your anxiety or your fears.
And this is pretty commonly used in English.
Now I start to feel anxious that I don't have it figured out.
Now I'm paralyzed by that.
And so when somebody feels paralyzed, they don't do anything, which means they're not figuring it out.
So how do you counsel somebody to flip from that state of kind of paralysis to?
It takes time to figure it out.
And my point is you need to start getting serious about figuring it out.
Well, we start.
We start with something.
I think one thing where people go wrong with 20-somethings is that I think they think reassurance and saying it's fine, you've got all the time in the world, you'll figure it out.
Reassurance doesn't actually make people feel better, or it makes them feel better for about an hour or a day, and then they come back for more.
We call clients or 20-somethings like this, people like this, reassurance junkies.
Reassurance junkies?
They're anxious, they get a little hit of reassurance, they feel better for a minute, but then they have to come back for more because reassurance it's empty.
Instead of saying, oh, it's fine, it doesn't matter, you'll be fine.
I say, hey, I'm taking your concerns seriously.
So what are we going to do?
What are you going to do?
Where can you start?
This next phrase is not one that is specifically used a lot of times in English, but putting any word with junkie is really common to use in English.
So you can kind of figure out the meaning of this phrase or any other phrase that contains junkie.
Let me explain it.
So when you reassure someone, You know you're kind of trying to encourage them or you're trying to lessen their doubts about something.
So maybe someone's about to get married and they're kind of nervous.
You might say, let me reassure you, getting married is going to be a good decision.
Or I think that your wife is going to be a really great wife.
Like you guys are going to be great together.
You're trying to reassure them so that they're not nervous or anxious about getting married.
When we say that somebody is a junkie, it can be a very negative term.
This is a slang term.
So it can mean literally someone who's addicted to drugs, but this is a very negative term to use.
Or we use it in more casual, lighthearted context.
Like, for instance, if someone is an adrenaline junkie, They are addicted to the feeling of danger.
Adrenaline like they love to go skydiving or they like to jump off cliffs with bungee cords.
They're an adrenaline junkie.
So in this podcast, she said reassurance junkies.
This isn't a common term, but you can figure out what it means by knowing this.
So reassurance junkie, someone who is addicted or really craves the feeling of people being like it's going to be okay.
You know, they have a hard time with having doubt and anxiety.
Thank you so much for watching this lesson with me.
I hope you liked learning through this podcast.
And if you want to check out the podcast that we learned from today, The Mel Robbins Show, make sure to check out the link below and start listening, because it's great English practice, especially if you discover a new podcast that you like to listen to consistently.
And make sure to visit EnglishWithKaylacom to learn more with me and to join my monthly membership, where you'll get access to all of the lesson resources.
I'll see you guys in the next lesson.
Hey, girl.
This is a matching set emergency.
Ugh, my favorite Lululemon leggings and Define jacket.
You know, the set you got me years ago?
The one you've seen me wear at every yoga class?
Well, I just got back from a weekend trip and had left my gym bag at the B&B.
Girl, I need to replace this outfit.
Could you send me the link to where you got it?
I need it ASAP.
I don't know what I'll do without it.
Thanks, girl.
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Bye.