This is an I Heart podcast.
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good morning.
This is Laura.
Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is that you are not the only one who can show love and support to your kids, friends and extended family.
Other people can show up for them too.
It doesn't always have to be you.
And there may be upsides to showing people the breadth of people who support them.
So my husband and I have five kids and two busy careers.
So it is simply not possible to be at everything for every kid.
It is not even a matter of work and life clashing.
You know that trope of someone being devastated because a late flight means she misses the softball game.
In my case, it is often life and life clashing.
If one kid has a game at the same time as another kid's game, there is no way to be at both simultaneously.
It doesn't matter if you are super mom or super dad.
It is still not physically possible.
When people say things like I've never missed a game, I think well, they just must not have that many kids.
But anyway, I digress.
We go to a lot and miss other things.
When we can't do something, we can often enlist someone else to go instead.
For instance, my five-year-old had a special person's tea last spring at school, right around Mother's Day.
I am very glad they called it special persons.
I was speaking overseas and my husband was also gone.
So who went?
Our 15-year-old son, who happened to have the morning off school because the high school was doing some testing that he wasn't scheduled to need to do.
My older son was a good sport about it, and how cool for a preschooler to have your teenage big brother come to your class.
Frankly, I think that's a lot more special than having mommy come.
Mommy does a lot of preschool stuff.
Teenage brother, not so much.
Especially as we head into December with all the extra performances and holiday parties and the like, it can be great to spread the love.
Maybe grandparents can come to a band concert and take the kid out for ice cream while you are traveling or are at another kid's dance recital, which happens to be at the exact same time.
Maybe a neighbor can bake cookies with a kid.
If you are tied up with swim meets on multiple weekends with another child.
This is also true for visiting elderly relatives or driving them to appointments or errands.
It doesn't always have to be you.
If you can mobilize friends or a broader network to visit and help out from time to time, there's less pressure on everyone.
Your mother might enjoy a half-hour visit from your childhood best friend.
And your childhood best friend, who also has elderly parents, will be perfectly comfortable interacting.
With a little invitation or nudge, your mom's former neighbor might be willing to visit too.
Or maybe a friend just had a new baby or is recovering from surgery.
And you know her family could use help with meals.
You don't have to cook for her family and yours every night.
Create a meal train and rally others to help out or send lots of DoorDash gift certificates.
Those work as well.
As people say, it takes a village to raise a child.
It also takes a village to care for other relatives and keep them connected.
It takes a village to get through hard times.
Don't assume that you have to be everything to the people you love.
One of the best gifts you can offer is to invite other people to extend their love and support too.
This takes pressure off you and lets your loved ones see the broader family and community that will support them.
There is a lot to be said for all of that.
In the meantime, this is Laura.
Thanks for listening.
And here's to making the most of our time.
Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast.
If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at laura at lauravandercam.com.
Before Breakfast is a production of iHeart Media.
For more podcasts from iHeart Media, please visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and I'm the host of the On Purpose podcast.
Recently, I had the honor of sitting down with the iconic Kris Jenner.
Even if one of your children has been through something really difficult with their partner or an ex-partner, you still love them as part of the unit and the family.
These are the fathers of my grandchildren and that love doesn't go away when we experience really challenging times with them.
Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
On the podcast Health Stuff, we are tackling all the health questions that keep you up at night.
I'm Dr. Priyanka Wally, a double board certified physician.
And I'm Hari Kundabolu, a comedian and someone who once Googled, do I have scurvy at 3 a.m.?
And on our show we're talking about health in a different way, like our episode where we look at diabetes.
In the United States, I mean, 50% of Americans are pre-diabetic.
How preventable is type 2?
Extremely.
Listen to Health Stuff on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
This is an I heart podcast.
