I'm making my body butter today.
I think that the topic that has been on my mind or the feeling that has been on my mind is change.
I'm someone who truly believes that One of the things that can change a life and there is the word again change
One of the things that can make or break a person is your ability to embrace change, your ability to move the miracle of change.
And I consider it a miracle because that's the only thing that is constant, isn't it?
And sometimes I sit and I wonder, why am I always moving?
And I think the answer is simple. because I listen, you know, I listen to the nudge within me.
I listen to whatever it is happening in my body, in my spirit.
And also I'm someone who has forceful interventions.
I don't know if this is the same for some of you.
I'm someone who, if I do not listen to something within me, if I do not listen to what I am being told or what my spirit is telling me, or what my body is telling me, it shows up in a more almost violent more, more hurtful and harmful way.
So I move because I must.
The secret is to wipe, make sure that there is no liquid anywhere.
And I mean, it can't mix practically, but you know what I mean?
You can't even have a drop of water in there because we don't want anything contaminating this.
So I dry it with love and care.
This day, I was moving and I just had this feeling.
It was so loud, you know.
As the guy who took down my boxes.
As he would go up and come down, I just kept feeling it in my body.
Call your mum.
And I was like, hmm, this is a milestone day for me.
Moving is a big deal.
You know, I've moved a lot of times, but moving is always a big deal.
And I don't know why this move just feels very different.
And I was like, OK, I'm going to call her when the truck takes my stuff and goes away.
And I went upstairs and I called my mom.
And I said, hi, Mama, I just wanted to tell you that I'm moving.
And it was this just sweet conversation.
I was just like, oh, I'm so happy you're moving.
I'm happy for you.
Where are you moving to?
I gave her updates to the city I was going to.
And she had this conversation with me and said, I just told her who I was.
I told her so many things about me, things that I know probably she's still afraid of right now as I make this video, but I needed to tell her.
And I remember at the end of the call, I said to her, don't you feel closer to me?
And she said, yes, I do.
I said, exactly.
That's how you get close to people.
You get to know them.
You get to hear who they are, not just who you want them to be, who they are.
And you don't have to accept everything, but you must respect it.
You must.
Ah!
It smells like heaven.
Oh my God!
I wanna eat it.
I saw that people bake cakes and stuff with it, but it's for my skin, so let's keep it that way.
I love baking.
I haven't baked in a while.
But I do love baking.
It really is completely different with family.
With strangers, I don't know, you just, I guess, show yourself and whatever happens, happens.
Who cares, I guess?
But I think with family, because there's just this almost knowing.
They've known you for so long and yet most times they have no clue who you are.
And then it's like something in your brain, you should know me, shouldn't you?
And then you're looking at, especially with parents, it's even worse.
And maybe when the messaging has always been that there's just this path and way to be and you deviate from that.
And then there's this protection.
And it's not even fear.
It's you protecting this person that you are from whatever experiences you've had in that space.
You're like, I will die protecting myself.
Stay away from me.
You, you, whatever name you want to call it.
And I guess it's just allowing yourself, when you eventually get to that point where you're able to go.
You know what?
I know that this person that I am is protected, even when I'm not all like, even when I don't have all my walls up and when I'm not like you know, almost cowering, hiding myself.
It was like.
I know I can open this person up and whatever you choose to do with this information you receive now is your business, you know.
And I think that's what makes the family aspect of it very interesting because, oh my God, a lot of us carry a lot of hurt and confusion because of where we come from.
I'm starting to soak some lentils, which I'll make a fritter out of after making the body butter.
Now this will be called Akara, as a Nigerian girl, but since this is not beans the natural, like the usual beans that we use, I'll just call it a fritter, before y'all come for my neck, because I know how precious you are about food, though you shouldn't be.
Food is art, is expression.
People should do whatever they want with food.
Mix and match.
That is how you come up with beauty.
It's art.
You know, I've been thinking about how a person can become someone who leans into change.
We all hear do it afraid, don't we?
And the idea of do it afraid is that, of course, you are afraid of what you're about to do.
So be afraid and do it afraid.
And I've said it before, but I think there's something I want to remind you of.
Everybody is afraid.
So, whether you are doing it or not doing it, you are doing it afraid.
If you stay stuck, that's you doing it afraid.
If you move, you are also doing it afraid.
Pick your fear.
Which fear is greater?
The person who doesn't take any risks is afraid that by taking a risk, they lose what they have.
That is fear.
Now, That fear keeps them holding on to what they have so tightly, refusing to venture into another space that might open up doors they can't even fathom.
But that fear keeps them stuck.
The person who jumps headfirst into things is afraid.
Sometimes afraid of what they are jumping into, but a lot of times they are afraid of staying sane.
Certainty, freedom, growth, possibility, all of those things happen in movement.
All of those things are found on the way.
No one ever did something magnificent, something so them.
Because I don't want to impose any idea of success on you.
I want you to be what you want.
But no one ever made a difference in their lives by staying where they are, staying the same.
Remember you're always afraid, always.
I can't think of one thing i've done in my life that i haven't done afraid.
Fear it's just a companion.
It really is, but then do you make it an enemy or do you call it a friend.
It's up to you.
I'm adding drops of lavender because my mummy told me to.
I was just going to whisk my oil that way.
But she was like, add something to add some scent, some natural oil.
What do you call them again?
They have a specific name.
Something oil, I can't remember.
Whatever it is, oil.
Yeah.
Human beings are led a lot of times by fear.
And sometimes that fear is so subtle.
And it's subtle because it's been planted.
Things like security.
Think about it.
It's so normalized.
So sometimes you don't even realize that what you call security is a type of fear.
It's an illusion.
Is it really real?
What is security?
What is it?
Hmm.
I mean, it does exist in some forms, but I think it's deeply personal.
But I don't think it exists in the way that we're told it does, which is, oh, just hold on tight.
Don't do this.
Don't do that.
Stay this way.
Follow this path.
Everything will be fine.
Is that the experience we're having?
Look around you.
How many people follow the traditional path?
Unfulfilled.
Unhappy.
Broke.
Broke, let's stay there.
Because money buys happiness.
Okay?
It does.
Money solves 90% of your problems.
Then the 10% your therapist can.
If you're one of those people who hates money when you hate something, you can never have it and let me tell you something that might break something open for you.
There's people who run this world, who run the societies we live in greedy, greedy people.
Wealth and greed are not synonyms.
Money is paper.
It's inanimate.
Money takes on the shape of the heart of the person who wields it.
Money doesn't change you.
Money exposes you.
Money exposes you.
Let the people with good hearts and intentions Start wielding what can make change.
There's a lot of people with greed and evil intentions wielding it.
This inanimate object that can move the world.
Use that intention of your heart to wield it.
Change your community, change your life.
Money is my friend.
Money likes me.
Of course it does.
Why wouldn't it?
One of my biggest dreams is to travel the world and eat, genuinely.
Like I dream of this day where I just pack my bags and just trottle from place to place and just taste food, eat all kinds of food.
I told my mother.
When I spoke to her, I said do you know?
I'm 28 years old, but I have 21 years of cooking experience.
And that is true.
I've been cooking for longer than many people have been alive.
But I don't really enjoy cooking.
I do enjoy eating though.
Now, I want to meet you.
Can you tell me in the comments where you are, where you live, what country, what cities?
I live in the UK.
I want to organize something for us.
It's going to be like a show slash a meetup.
I want to share poetry, words with you, my mind, my heart with you.
And then we chat.
You ask me questions.
We talk, we laugh, yeah.
Obviously I'm in the UK, so this is going to start here first, but I'm thinking sometime in October or November.
Where are you?
Let me know in the comments so I can plant something.
Let's meet.
That'd be nice, yeah?
I think that'd be lovely.
Absolutely stunning.
Completely creamy.
I scream, I scream, you scream.
Behold my labor of love.
Hopefully these get me through winter plus hopefully like mid next year, but I'm quite generous, so probably not.
I love everyone.
It's only me.
Baby.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Stay moisturized.
Do care for yourselves.
Look for something that you love doing and make sure you do at least something good for yourself once a week.
Look at me taking care of my skin, my dry skin, keeping it moisturized.
And I smell like chocolate.
Take care and hopefully I get to see you soon.
Bye.
