Hi everyone, I'm Debbie Millman, your guest host for the week.
Welcome to Radio Headspace and to Tuesday.
If you listen yesterday, then you know that this week is all about being intentional
about creating a career and a life that we love.
But before we can do what we love, we have to know what we love and what we really want.
Today we'll discuss different ways to determine what we want out of life and how that can
help focus our career.
So when I graduated college, I hadn't even known about what it meant to do an internship
before you graduate.
My only job when I was studying in school were working at a pizza joint, making pizza
pies.
And so when I graduated, I really only knew one thing and that was I wanted to live in
Manhattan.
My dad lived in Manhattan for a couple of years as I was growing up.
I'm a native New Yorker and this felt like the perfect place to sort of make my life.
But I also knew that I wanted to live a creative life and I suspected that I couldn't do both.
And this is really where I, in many ways, compromised on what I was considering possible
for myself.
And I moved to Manhattan and I could have become a waitress or a bartender or any number
of other types of service jobs.
But I was afraid that if I did that, my pain might become quite unpredictable and therefore
it might be very, very challenging to sustain a life in Manhattan.
And so I became a commercial artist.
I pursued a career as a designer and a commercial artist as opposed to one that was all about
fine art.
And for decades, I was sure that I had compromised on what I wanted because I was doing commercial
work as opposed to more fine art and creative work.
But what I realized many years later was that I didn't really compromise on the most important
thing that I wanted at that time, which was to live in Manhattan.
So for me, it was about being able to make enough money to be as self-sufficient as I could
be, as safe and secure as I could be at that time.
And it was only decades later that I felt that I could manifest a couple of the other
things on my list.
As we are navigating the path of our careers and our futures, oftentimes we are afraid
of doing something as we've talked about because we are unsure about the outcome.
The most important step in moving into a future that you want to have is the courage to
make it happen.
Courage is so much more important than confidence.
Danny Shapiro, the writer, told me after an episode of Design Matters that she felt
that confidence was overrated.
And it really startled me because it suddenly reframed everything that I thought about what
I needed to be in order to get what I want.
All you need is the courage to step into that space of uncertainty.
So I define confidence as the successful repetition of any endeavor.
We build and grow confidence after doing what it is that we want to do enough times to
become first slightly successful and then more successful and then successful, actually
successful.
It doesn't mean you're always going to be successful at it.
But if you can do it enough times, you'll become better at it over time so that ultimately
you will be successful.
Okay, that's it for today.
Tomorrow we'll discuss how to deal with professional setbacks and how to still move forward when
things don't quite go as planned.
Because that happens to everyone.
Thank you for listening and I'll see you back here soon.