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Hi there. It's Eve.
Welcome to Radioheadspace and to Wednesday.
So it's the middle of a busy week.
I thought it'd be nice to start with a quick grounding exercise.
So often we're doing multiple things at once.
So for the next few moments, see if you can be fully here and present.
So keeping your eyes open, notice what you can see around you.
What shapes, colors do you notice?
Then listen to what you can hear – sounds are all around us.
And now feel your feet on the ground, your body supported.
And then take a slower, deeper breath.
Breathing in through your nose, and out through your mouth.
And see if you can allow the body to soften and to release any tension you might be holding.
Thank you for doing that with me.
So, we live in a world where there are a lot of different opinions.
I mean, you just have to go on social media or watch the news to see quite how many differing opinions there are in the world.
And I want to start by saying that it's actually good to have different opinions, it's healthy.
But what's not okay is when people try to force their opinions onto you or convince you that you're wrong for what you believe in.
I'm pretty sure we've all been in conversations where someone says something that you completely disagree with.
Perhaps your chest tightens and then your mind starts racing with counterarguments.
I think what's become more challenging in recent years is how to navigate the onslaught of differing opinions, which can often cause a lot of harm and be really divisive, especially if they don't align with our own core values.
As human beings, we're all uniquely different and our beliefs, our values, our opinions are shaped by so many factors, our upbringing, our experiences, and the people we surround ourselves with.
So when someone challenges what we believe in, whether that's in person or say through watching the news.
It can feel like a personal attack, almost as if they're questioning who we are.
It feels deeply personal, and a lot of anger can arise.
And it's OK to feel angry or to feel defensive, especially if what you're seeing and hearing is causing you and others distress.
But feeding into that anger with more anger is not always the most helpful thing to do.
What can be helpful in those moments is to pause, to step back, to take a breath or two or three and then choose how to respond.
When the brain is hijacked by strong emotions like anger, we don't always act in the most But doing so with a little more clarity and calm is often much more effective.
I remember a conversation with my mom about something we'd had completely different opinions about.
I was pretty frustrated she didn't agree with me or see my point of view.
But instead of listening to her point of view, I was just waiting for my turn to speak.
I wasn't curious about her perspective.
I was solely focused on how I could prove my point.
The conversation didn't end that well, and you know what?
I would give anything to be able to have that conversation again.
My mom passed away 18 months ago, and we were really close, but I often think back to times we had disagreements, and I wish I could rewind the clock.
Perhaps I could've learned something from her and expanded my perspective.
Knowing that we will encounter many people in our lives that do have different opinions, what's a more mindful way to handle conversations we don't agree with, without getting defensive or shutting down?
When someone says something you strongly disagree with, your first instinct might be to react immediately.
But, before you respond, pause, take a breath, and ask yourself, am I actually listening or just trying to prove a point?
2. Be curious. But you also may learn something you didn't know before, and it may expand your perspective.
3. Know when to walk away.
A lot of conversations are worth having.
They help us to understand different perspectives and challenge our own thinking.
But some conversations can go around in circles and become toxic.
In those moments, it is A -OK to step away.
Setting boundaries isn't about avoiding discomfort.
It's about knowing when a conversation is no longer productive or healthy.
I hope this was helpful.
Thanks so much for joining me today.
I'll leave it there and I look forward to seeing you back here tomorrow.
