You're listening to TED Talks Daily, where we bring you new ideas and conversations to spark your curiosity every day.
I'm your host, Elise Hu.
I have been counting down the days until I could share this talk with you, because it is from comedian and rock star Charlene Kay, who took to the TED stage in a brilliantly shiny silver jumpsuit to break down a truly global phenomenon for us.
It's part musical part, dance performance part, comedy part how to guide for becoming a K-pop superstar.
All I can say is enjoy.
Hello, everyone!
My name is Charlene Kay.
I actually started my career out as a pop musician and after 20 years of grinding in the industry, the way I know that I've finally made it is that I am now a stand-up comedian.
And today, here at TED, I'd like to talk about something that I have been obsessed with for years, which is K-pop.
Do we have any K-pop fans in here?
Oh, nice!
If not, don't worry, there's nothing wrong with being a straight dude.
And if you love K-pop and you're a straight dude, are you sure about that?
So you might think that it is extremely difficult to be a K-pop star.
You have to move to Korea, you have to do this whole training program, and I'm here to tell you today that that's not true.
It's actually really easy to be a K-pop star.
Anybody can do it.
And I'm going to show every single one of you how in the next seven minutes.
Are we ready?
Ready?
All right, great.
So in K-pop, you have the girl groups and the boy groups.
You want to be in a girl group?
So easy.
All you have to do is be super cute but not too young.
Looking really sexy but not too slutty.
Really badass but not too masculine.
You know, all the things men have to think about.
So when you start the song, you're not going to sing.
You're not going to sing.
You're going to talk.
Then the main rapper comes in, and she has something the first girl doesn't have, which is... bangs.
Now I'm gonna rap like a sexy baby.
I'm a savage.
You all wanna hate me.
Now I'm gonna twerk like Cardi B, Cause the Bronx is a neighborhood in Korea And then you might know, Korea is a very Christian nation, So you can't really sing about sex, So instead you're gonna sing about fruit Cherries are red and berries are blue.
It's not about sex, we just really like fruit.
And then after fruit, logically, you're going to sing about guns.
I'm serious.
But you have to stay cute.
Never mind that guns are illegal to civilians in South Korea.
You're really cute, but you're also in N.W.A.
All right, now let's talk about the boy groups.
First thing you're going to do is join the other members of your group who are 23 ripped twinks.
And you're going to rap some sexy nursery rhymes.
Now, how do you do that?
You just got to whisper everything like it is the filthiest thing you've ever said to anyone.
It's so easy.
Just like this.
Twinkle little star.
Three little piggies go to market.
Old McDonald had a farm.
Yeah, girl, I'm a little teapot.
Now it's time for the course.
There are too many of you if you were to each have your own line.
So what are we going to yell about?
Guns!
Then all of you jump at the same time.
Turn it up, turn it up, it's showtime.
A line about a gun.
We've never seen a gun.
Then we whisk off a random food.
But it's like sexy.
Spending that cheese, I'm hot like a fever.
And now it's a completely different genre.
There are still 20 dudes who haven't sung yet.
We're going to sing more foods like ice cream, hot sauce, chicken noodle soup donut cherry bomb, butter fondue.
It's not about sex.
We just really like food.
Let's talk about something that happens with both the girl and the boy groups.
And this is something that I call the OBR, or the obligatory reggaeton section.
And in this section, it is mandatory.
You talk about how you're either really cold or really hot, and there's no in-between.
Here we go.
It's either really cold or really really hot.
Super, super cold, except when I'm hot.
I'm freezing like an igloo, I'm burning up a sweat, Trying not to sing in a Jamaican accent.
Cold Winter, winter falls.
Goodbye winter, winter again.
Hot, so hot hot, hot enough.
These are all real songs, by the way.
Winter bear winter winter, flower Very hot, I'm so hot, hot sauce, Snow flower, winter without you, Hot hand, hot issue, hot summer, Sweet winter, the winter's tale.
It's cold, Like it, hot fire, flame and fire.
All these cold songs and all these hot songs.
There's no such thing as warm in K-pop.
We've reached the most critical moment in any K-pop song, which is the dubstep dance break.
For no reason.
Now, how do we do this?
You're gonna do the following moves.
Number one, you're gonna glitch like you're connecting to dial-up internet in 1999.
Then you're going to make pizza in the Matrix.
You heard me.
Then you're going to be a horny mime in a glass box.
And then finally, you're going to give the angriest massage and end in a pose called the Passion of the Christ.
You guys got all that, right?
It's so easy.
We're going to do it together.
Here we go.
We've reached the finale of the song.
This part usually has really uplifting lyrics like shining like a shooting star or climbing to the top of a mountain.
It goes just like this.
I am gonna shine like a shooting star.
I am gonna climb to the mountain top just to be with you.
Then every element of the song randomly comes back and the person with the highest voice in the group does way too much.
Then you end in a move called the magic mic.
Everyone turn their phone flashlights on.
I am gonna climb to the mountaintop.
I'm either really cold or I'm really hot for McDonald's.
Strawberry sundae You can eat my tangerine Girl, I'm a little teapot Congratulations, you're now a K-pop superstar.
Thank you so much.
That was Charlene Kaye speaking at TED Next 2025.
If you're curious about TED's curation, find out more at TED.com slash curation guidelines.
And that's it for today.
TED Talks Daily is part of the TED Audio Collective.
This talk was fact-checked by the TED Research Team and produced and edited by our team Martha Estefanos, Oliver Friedman, Brian Green, Lucy Little and Tansika Sangmarnivong.
This episode was mixed by Christopher Fasey-Bogan.
Additional support from Emma Taubner and Daniela Balarezo.
I'm Elise Hugh.
I'll be back tomorrow with a fresh idea for your feed.
Thanks for listening.
