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Hello, welcome to or welcome back to Trying Not To Care.
My name's Ashley and I upload every single Monday. and I'm so excited that you decided to join me today.
Before we get into the episode, I do want to let you know that I started up a new group chat If you're interested in joining, it's a really fun place to meet other girls who listen to the podcast.
There's rooms to discuss the episodes, talk about pop culture, books... wellness all things adulting just a really cute and fun place for all of us to connect so if you're interested and you want to pop in the link is in the show notes Today's episode is a little controversial because the day that I'm uploading this is September 1st and I am... an advocate for an early fall.
I love celebrating fall at the very beginning of September.
I would argue it is the best fall month, even though it's technically still summer.
Because you get to enjoy all the fall things without freezing your butt off.
There's apple picking. There's pumpkin flavored coffee.
I'm drinking mine right now. There's pumpkin-flavored treats.
You can watch your favorite fall shows, fall movies, plant some fall flowers, you know, get your moms ready.
And it's more enjoyable, in my opinion, because you still have two more months to do it.
I don't want to wait until October to celebrate fall because then I feel rushed and I feel like there's not enough time to do everything that I want to do.
So sue me, I love an early fall. But I get that there's some of you that want to hold off until October.
I totally get that. I see you. I encourage you to do that and I encourage you to come back to this episode when you're ready at your own time. when you're ready to fall out.
But I'm ready to fall out now. Today's episode is going to be the first of all the fall episodes this year and it's going to be a transitional one so today We're going to talk about transitioning from summer to fall and how you can be the happiest, healthiest, hottest version of you this season.
I don't want to just focus on the physical.
I want to give you tips on how to glow up this fall inside and out.
We're going to touch on how to feel more at peace this season how to look and feel your best physically and mentally, how to be more confident and aligning yourself with your goals.
So with all of that being said, let's get into today's episode.
I think one thing that can easily be overlooked is the power of creating cozy routines and rituals.
We're pushed to be super intentional about our goals and we make time for work and things that we quote-unquote need to do because when we're productive we feel good but Being productive doesn't just mean hustling and working hard.
Resting and taking care of yourself is just as productive.
With that being said, making time to just relax and take care of your mental health is so important and actually helps you be more productive when it comes to your work and goals.
Because when you do take the time to look after you, you're well rested, you have a better mindset, and you have more energy to do those harder things.
I really recommend having morning and evening wind down rituals, not necessarily routines, but Things that you make time for even when you have a really crazy busy schedule.
So you might not be able to do all of these things every single day, but you can at least make time for a few of them.
Some ideas for morning rituals are waking up slow, which actually helps you not be super anxious or stressed out because it keeps your cortisol from spiking like it normally would if you were to just feel rushed and get up right away and start doing everything that you need to do journaling doing some positive self-affirmations or EFT tapping Those also help with anxiety and just help you feel more positive.
Stretching, yoga, making yourself a warm cup of tea or a fall flavored coffee, and then putting on like a fall playlist or a fall movie to start your day.
And then ideas for evening and wind down rituals are screen-free time, lighting some fall scented candles, doing your skincare routine, taking a bath, reading a book, putting on some cozy fall pjs or just listening to some really relaxing jazz music while you clean up your space for the night I also think incorporating some type of light therapy into your day is a really good idea.
I don't wear my red light therapy mask every night, but when I do, I feel so luxurious.
I feel so bougie. I feel like I'm taking my self-care to the next level. just so good for you, especially during the darker, colder months.
And yes, I know September is still warm.
Some days are literally hot, but it does. get darker earlier, and it is good to get into the habit of doing red light therapy. for when it does get darker out.
Red light therapy helps regulate your circadian rhythm, which is important because it'll help you sleep better and it gives you more energy.
And then also bright light exposure helps balance serotonin, dopamine, and melatonin, which again will help you sleep better and feel better.
I have the Skin Gym light mask, but I also have this face sculptor that has red light on it.
I think any kind of red light's good. I love doing both of them either in the morning or at night time.
Usually in the morning I'm wearing my mask when I'm making a coffee or doing journaling and then at night time I like to put it on after I do my skincare or when I'm reading a book or I'm just scrolling on my phone.
It's just a nice way to start and end the day and give myself a little more care.
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That's Nutraful.com, promo code TNTC. I think another thing that a lot of people don't think about and don't put a lot of energy into is their social connections.
Sometimes making plans and checking in on our friends and family can fall short because we're just very nonchalant about it.
Some of our loved ones don't care if we don't talk.
They don't care if we go weeks without seeing each other.
They don't care. if you check in on them, so we don't.
But I think it's so important to make space in your day-to-day life for your people and to have nourishing connections.
So many people are often looking for things to satisfy them, things to make them happy, things to get them by.
And the fix to that can be spending time with your loved ones.
We're literally wired for connection and having deep relationships and friendships give us fulfillment.
I love spending time alone. There's times where I desperately need alone time and to connect with myself.
But if I don't have a good balance of alone time and socializing, I tend to struggle really bad with my mental health.
If I go too long in isolation and I don't see any of my friends and family, I get really stressed out.
I get really anxious. and i'm just very in my head so this season i'm going to be very intentional about reaching out and checking in on my friends and family, making sure that I'm doing my part in our connection.
I want to be intentional about making plans and planning romantic but also platonic fall dates, doing all the fall festivities like apple picking, going and getting pies and apple cider and all that fun fall stuff.
I swear there's nothing better than coming home from a good day with your favorite person or favorite people and just feeling so loved and seen and And you just had the most fun.
And also, I just want to share my favorite season with my favorite people.
I don't want to experience failure. fall alone.
I think spending time with your friends and family is just as important as the goals that you make for yourself this season.
Like I said before, yes, working hard and hustling is important, but slowing down and relaxing and enjoying yourself is important too.
Moving on to how we're gonna feel our best this fall, I wanna talk about the things that you can do to feel your best internally.
First tip, wake up earlier, which I know is so annoying to hear and it's also so hard to do.
But I've never regretted waking up early, but I have regretted snoozing my alarm and waking up late.
I know that it could be really hard to wake up early, But it's really only difficult the first few minutes.
Once you get past that, it's not that bad.
There's a few reasons why waking up earlier is going to make you feel better.
The first reason being when you get up with or before the sun, you soak in the natural light, which again helps your circadian rhythm.
It'll boost your mood by increasing serotonin and also increase nighttime melatonin production so you sleep better.
It'll increase your productivity because you have a little headstart since you're waking up earlier, So you have time to do more and you also have time to organize your day.
And then the third reason, you get to romanticize your morning.
More time equals doing what you actually want to do.
If you wake up in a rush and immediately have to get ready and go to work, you're not going to feel as good as you would if you gave yourself an extra hour or two to enjoy your morning if you gave yourself time to wake up slow take a hot nice shower to make yourself a warm cup of coffee to make yourself a healthy breakfast to let your dogs out and get some fresh air.
The one thing that helps me get up and not snooze my alarm is putting my phone across the room.
So when my alarm goes off, I need to get up to turn it off or else it's gonna annoy me for the next half an hour.
So I leave it across the room and when I get up, I don't allow myself to get back into bed.
That approach is a little intense and not super nice.
So if you want to be kinder to yourself and the way that you wake up, I've seen people change their hatch alarm. to the Gilmore Girls theme song, which I think is so cute and such an easy way to romanticize your morning.
I still have not watched Gilmore Girls. I think last year I said I was going to, but I haven't yet.
But I promise you this year I will. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.
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Get outside daily for the same reasons to get some vitamin D, to get some sun.
Even if it's just for a few minutes to let your animals out, drink your morning coffee or tea, stretch, journal out on the porch, just get outside.
My favorite thing, especially in the fall, is going on a morning coffee walk.
Like I genuinely look forward to that. The lineup is, make yourself a fall flavored coffee, obviously my preference is pumpkin.
Put on a big hoodie. I'm talking like three sizes too big.
Maybe a sweater, some shorts, your Uggs, sunglasses, headphones, and go for a walk.
And when you're on that walk, you're going to listen to either a self-improvement podcast, preferably a podcast episode relating to fall, or you're going to listen to a fall playlist.
My go-to album every single fall is read by Taylor Swift.
But that might change depending on October 3rd.
There might be... A whole new album I'm listening to this fall.
But that is my go-to fall album. Red and then Evermore.
That is my fall music. Tip number three. do your best to eat protein throughout the day but specifically some type of protein for breakfast I am a sucker when it comes to fall trades.
I love waking up and having chocolate chip, pumpkin bread, apple fritters, my large iced coffee with so much pumpkin cold foam on top.
I'm not saying that you can't have those things.
But if you're going to have them, try to also pair them with some type of protein because that's what's going to give you energy and fuel your body throughout the day.
I usually crash around 3, 3.30. The clock strikes 3 and it feels like I got hit by a truck.
And it's even worse during the colder months.
So eating protein helps avoid those energy crashes and it also helps with your mood and for focusing by again boosting dopamine and serotonin.
I like eggs. I like having eggs in the morning.
I love eggs with some bacon. some avocado that's my thing but i know that eggs freak a lot of people out so if that's you and you're like i'm not eating eggs i don't care about the protein i'm not eating eggs You could have Greek yogurt, you could have a protein shake, you could have oats, and you could even have some pumpkin spiced granola on top, and still have a cute little fall treat, but still get protein.
And then tip number four, try to find a workout that works for you.
Obviously everyone has different goals when it comes to working out, But during the fall, in my opinion, it's even more important to move your body because your body's producing more melatonin, which can make you feel more tired.
So moving your body, even if it's going for a walk or doing yoga, It's going to wake your body up and give you more energy and more motivation.
I also just feel more at ease When I am moving my body, I feel less anxious.
I would argue that I'm happier and more pleasant to be around.
And I sleep better. And I have such a hard time sleeping.
I have insomnia. I struggle with night terrors.
I just can't catch a break when it comes to sleep.
But on days that I do like go to a workout class, I find that I fall asleep better.
I like to think of fall as a transitional grounding season, so I like to match my workouts to that.
I think during the summer, I'm much more likely to run.
If I do run, let's be honest, I don't run much.
But like if I'm going to run, it's going to be during the summer.
I usually lift weights during the summer.
I just feel like I'm more active and I do more intense workouts during the warmer months.
And then when it gets colder, I like to do yoga.
I've been doing barre. I like to go for walks.
I think Pilates is really good. Just more... lower impact workouts that get the job done, but in a way where you're able to slow down with the season.
Next, I want to talk about feeling good and also looking good.
When I say we're having hot girl fall, I don't mean just physically, I mean we're feeling confident.
We're feeling self-assured. We're magnetic.
We're getting what we want because we deserve it.
Of course, we're still gonna be looking good.
We're gonna be looking hot. It is hot girl fall.
So the first tip is, you're actually going to try to look good.
I feel like during the summer, it's so easy to be effortlessly beautiful and look like you didn't try because you didn't.
Like our skin is tan, our hair is highlighted from the sun.
We're wearing our hair natural. We have that summer glow.
But then the colder months creep in and suddenly things aren't looking so good.
Unfortunately, my tan has already faded.
I am looking pretty pasty. But just because we have to try harder to look good doesn't mean it's a bad thing.
I actually think it could be really fun to try and put an effort into how you present yourself.
It can be overwhelming though to do your hair and do your makeup and put on a fire fit.
So I am going to suggest that when you're getting ready, that you do the two out of three rule, which means you pick two out of three, hair, makeup, or outfit.
You can do all three. but you don't have to.
You're not getting extra credit for doing all three.
This way, you look good, you look put together like you actually tried without feeling overwhelmed and having a meltdown.
So just pick two out of the three. Do your hair and do your makeup.
Fuck the outfit. Put on a cute fit. Do your hair.
Fuck the makeup. Two out of the three. Going off of that, another easy way to glow up the season is to switch up your self-care routines and match it to the season.
For your skincare, I would go for more hydrating products, a gentle cleanser that's non stripping a hydrating cleanser, I would go for a richer moisturizer.
So instead of using a gel moisturizer, go for a cream or a lotion because during the colder months there is less moisture which leads to dry skin and when you have dry skin It's really hard to work with, especially when you're putting makeup on top of it.
I would add in a gentle exfoliator to keep your skin smooth, especially if you are struggling with dry skin.
It's going to make it a lot easier to put makeup on if you're scrubbing the dead skin away.
I would also add in some type of face oil, but I would avoid using it when you're putting makeup on just because makeup doesn't always mix the best with it.
You have to be very specific about which products you're using with each other.
But at nighttime, I like to use castor oil and rosehip oil.
And you can even use castor oil in your hair, on your eyebrows, and your lashes to help with hair growth.
I would also switch to a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner that has ingredients like shea butter and argan oil. not only because of the cooler air but coming from summer your hair can kind of be ratty and damaged from the sun but also if you're swimming in a lot of chlorine So it's good to hydrate your hair and do some damage control.
I like to do a deep conditioning mask once a week.
I usually do this on Sundays. Sundays are my reset day.
But again, to hydrate your hair and to strengthen your hair and to just give it more shine.
If you want to get crazy, I think fall... is the perfect season to give yourself a little hair makeover, especially if If your hair did lighten during the summer, I think this is the perfect time to go a little darker, maybe add some caramel highlights, maybe a little red, a little auburn.
I also like to do a tinted gloss. So if you don't want to commit to dyeing your hair, A hair gloss will still give you some color without having to make a full commitment.
And then, you know, I'm not an advocate for this, but It is a good time to do the bob, okay?
You don't have to do a bob. I got a bob last year, and I deeply regretted it, but...
I do think it's a good time to do it. Maybe even a trim is a good idea too, if not the bob.
Especially if you have split ends and damage from the past couple months.
I just truly love giving myself a makeover with a new season.
Like, new season, new me, bitch. I just thrive off of new energy.
And that's what we're gonna work with when it comes to how we feel this season.
I wanna use this new energy to empower me, to make me feel so confident, so powerful, so hot, and so secure.
So let's talk about some confidence rituals.
The first ritual that we will be doing daily.
I suggest you do this morning and night or whenever you need it, but specifically morning and night.
Daily affirmations. The ones that I go to daily that are ingrained in my brain that I say without even having to think about them are, I am powerful.
I am creative. I'm influential. I'm inspiring.
I'm strong. I help people all over the world.
I'm doing enough and everything is working out for me.
The thing about positive self-affirmations and repeating positive statements to yourself is it shifts your internal dialogue from you criticizing yourself and you being really mean to yourself or you having really anxious thoughts to more positive ones.
On the days where I'm just not feeling too hot about myself, I'm having a bad day, I can't shake the funk.
When I say positive self affirmations to myself, it does make me feel a little bit better.
It makes me feel a little more confident.
It just takes over those negative thoughts and turns them into more positive ones.
And yeah, maybe at first when you're saying positive self-affirmations, they feel silly, they feel stupid, you don't believe them.
But the more that you say it, the more you do believe it.
When you are consistently telling yourself something, whether it's good or bad, you start to believe it.
That's why when you're mean to yourself and you say, I'm so stupid, I'm so ugly, I'm so worthless. you identify with those things because you're constantly feeding that to yourself and telling yourself, this is who I am.
It's the same thing when you tell yourself positive things like I am great, I am powerful, I'm doing enough.
The more that you say that to yourself, the more you identify with it.
We're also going to be intentional about celebrating ourselves big and small.
We're not going to push any of our hard work under the rug and pretend that it's not a big deal.
You should be celebrating yourself every single day and rooting for yourself the way that you root for other people.
Because the more that you celebrate your wins, the more that you believe in yourself and the more that you like yourself.
I like to do this at the end of every day.
I like to think of three things that I did well.
Usually it is work-related, but I also like to think of...
The little things that I did throughout the day, like I did my laundry that's been piling up in my room for the last two weeks.
I said yes to plans even though I was really anxious.
I handled a situation better than I would have in the past.
All of those things should be acknowledged.
Those are great things and they're great work and you shouldn't minimize any good work that you do.
The next thing that we're going to do that's going to help us feel more confident this season is being more intentional about our words and being aware of the value that our words hold.
I want to be more aware of what I say before I say it, so that means not being impulsive before I send a message, thinking before I say something that might be hurtful, and thinking of the impact that my words are going to make before I let them come out of my mouth or before I send that message.
I also want to be more aware of the actual words that are coming out of my mouth.
I desperately want to cut out filler words.
I am so guilty of like and um. And I think the reason I use filler words is because in the past I've tried to cut them out and I've tried to expand my vocabulary and be intentional about how what i say and how i say it and i've had people criticize me and say why are you speaking like that why are you using these big words And they would make me feel bad about it and make me feel as if I'm dumb and I shouldn't be speaking the way that I'm trying to speak.
It made me feel... I was about to say like again, it made me feel as if I wasn't smart enough to speak that way.
And I had to dumb down my words because that was who I was as a person.
That's how they made me feel. But that's stupid.
You shouldn't have to dumb down yourself.
You shouldn't have to minimize yourself. to make other people feel more comfortable about how you decide to express yourself.
When I slow down and really think about what I'm trying to say, it does make me feel more confident about what I'm trying to articulate and express.
I also want to get better at decreasing the amount of what I'm saying I sometimes over explain myself because I want to make sure I'm getting my point across.
But sometimes when you say too much, it's too much and people just tap out and they don't want to listen because you're saying too much.
Most of the time when you over explain yourself it takes away the value of what you're trying to say and people just see you as someone who loves to yap and loves to hear their own voice.
I want to get better at getting my point across without adding the fluff.
I also think when you're speaking to the right people, They appreciate and respect you more when you are intentional about your words and can get your point across in the most clear, concise way.
Not only does it make you feel more confident, it gives off confidence.
It gives off, I know who I am, I know what I'm saying, and I know what my value is here.
I want to end this episode with how we're going to be successful this fall.
Think of this fall as the new January. How would you feel if a brand new year just began?
More than likely, you would feel so motivated, so excited. so ready to start things over and get things right.
We don't have to wait until the end of this year.
We can finish this year off strong and use this year as a new beginning.
I like to look at the goals I made for myself at the beginning of the year.
I take a look at my vision board. I reread my journals and I reread my manifestations. and I evaluate where I was and where I'm at now.
You might look at your goals from the beginning of the year and they still resonate.
You still want to go after them, which is great.
That's when you decide to recommit to what still matters.
But also, more than likely, a lot of you will look at your goals and look at your manifestations and laugh at past you because it is so... far from what you want moving forward.
You have completely changed your mind. You're like, who is that girl?
I don't know why she wanted that, but that's not what we're doing.
And if that is the case, It just means it's time to pivot and let go of what no longer serves you or what you no longer want.
Let go of that. Let go of what you're no longer interested in and get clear about what you do want.
Correct those goals and make new goals and set new intentions.
This is the time to be intentional with your time.
Be intentional about how you move. what you do and what you spend your energy on.
If it makes it easier, create a vision board.
You don't have to only make a vision board at the beginning of the year. make another one.
You could even do a monthly vision board to work on a smaller amount of goals per month to make sure you're working towards them.
It's important that you build routines and schedules that support your visions and goals.
Think about what it is that you want and then think about what are the steps that it's going to take to achieve those things.
And once you know what it takes, you have to schedule them into your day-to-day life.
For example, if you want to get better grades this semester, think of things that you can do to make sure you achieve that goal.
That could be getting a planner to stay organized so you know what assignments need to be done.
That could be making sure you get to class on time so you can get a good seat and talk to your teacher. setting aside time in your day to study and do your homework.
It could be making sure you go to bed early so you're well rested.
Your goals will not work unless you do. So you need to make sure you're being intentional about what you spend your time doing.
Time blocking is also a really good way to help you stay on top of your goals and to make sure that you're checking off everything that you need to do.
Digital detoxing in the morning and before bed is a good idea too, aka having time off your phone and off of any social media that's distracting you so you're not spending your time scrolling or doing things that interfere with you achieving your goals.
I also like the idea of using specific days of the week to get certain things done.
Mondays, for me are my go-to hustle day.
That's when I'm locked in and I try to do the bigger chunks of work And I'm not on my phone unless obviously I have to be for work.
And then Sundays are my reset day. I think Sundays are the perfect day. day to do the tedious tasks like cleaning up your space and going to the grocery store and meal prepping and doing self-care and organizing and getting ready for the week to make sure the week goes by smoother.
These are all tips that I'm going to be doing and implementing into my daily routine to have the best fall to glow up this fall I just want to work to be the most confident successful happy and at peace version of myself this season Again, fall is a season of transition and it's a good time to slow down, but also level up.
It's a time to find that perfect balance between taking care of yourself and working towards your goals.
Whether you're considering September as fall or you're waiting till October, I hope that this episode reminds you to use this new season as a new opportunity to take care of yourself and to work to be the best version of you.
If you have any tips or you want to let me know what you're doing this season to be the happiest healthiest hottest version of you you can let me know on spotify through the comments or you can let me know in the group chat again the group chat's in the show notes and i hope that I see you there.
I hope you join and you come hang out. But that's everything for today.
I hope that you loved today's episode. If you did, make sure to rate it on Spotify and Apple wherever you listen.
Make sure to follow me on my social media and check back next week for a new episode.
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