That space video!
Greetings, greetings everyone!
Welcome to Radio Headspace.
My name is Kaisonga and it's Monday.
I'm hoping everyone was able to have a restful and enjoyable weekend.
So for today, I wanted to talk a bit about betrayal, being stabbed in the back, being
duped, getting hoodwinked and bamboozled.
And I know I know what a positive way to start the week off Kaisonga.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
But to be honest, I'm not sorry.
For this podcast, I tend to discuss those things that are most pertinent in my life,
or topics that have come into my awareness.
And it just so happens that the topic of betrayal has revealed its deceptive head as of late.
So as my therapist used to say, let's talk about it.
One of my favorite things to do is to sit down with some snacks and watch a good movie.
Well, that's exactly what I was doing on this particular day when I received a phone
call from a friend.
He was obviously distressed and talking frantically.
I told him to take some deep breaths and to explain to me what the problem was.
He plainly said, I'm divorcing that BITCH.
Hearing him say this, I immediately knew that something terrible had occurred.
He had been married for about eight years and truly loved his wife.
The marriage wasn't perfect by any means, but whose marriage is.
But overall, they were happy.
Or so he thought.
He told me that he recently discovered that she was having an affair with an old boyfriend.
Their affair had been going on for about six months.
He was heartbroken in experiencing a whirlwind of strong emotions, anger, sadness, confusion,
anxiety, worry, and on and on.
I felt so bad for him.
This was one of the greatest forms of betrayal, and it got me thinking about the many dynamics
of betrayal.
How it affects us on all levels, physically, mentally and emotionally.
And how can mindfulness help us to navigate it effectively?
But trail.
Just hearing the word can evoke a sense of discomfort.
It's that moment when trust is shattered and it feels like the ground beneath you completely
disappears and you're doing a free fall into nothingness.
It's really the most sinking feeling.
You're a friend who breaks your confidence, a partner who deceives you, or a colleague
who undermines you.
A trail can leave deep, deep scars.
Physically, a trail can manifest in many ways.
You might feel a knot in your stomach, your heart might race, or you could experience severe
muscle tension.
These reactions are your body's way of saying something's wrong.
Your nervous system goes into high alert, and it's easy to feel like you're in a constant
state of high stress.
Emotionally, like I said, betrayal can lead to a whirlwind of feelings, anger, sadness,
confusion, and even guilt.
You might question what you did wrong or wonder if you could have prevented it.
It's a rollercoaster of emotions that can be quite overwhelming.
Mentally, betrayal can make you question everything you thought you knew.
Trust once broken is very hard to rebuild.
You might find yourself replaying the events, trying to make sense of them, or even doubting
your judgment.
It says if your mind is stuck in a loop, seeking answers that may never come.
So how can mindfulness help us through this turbulent journey?
Because that's exactly what it is.
It's a journey.
Mindfulness is the practice of being present, of observing your thoughts and feelings
without judgment as you travel along this journey.
It gives you the space to process your emotions and begin the healing process.
And it is a process.
It's badly as you want to feel better right away, unfortunately, it just doesn't work that
way.
As one of my teachers would say, the only way to the other side is through.
Now some of this is going to sound familiar as we have discussed mindfulness in depth before.
But in my humble opinion, you can never talk too much about the powerful practice of mindfulness.
After all, repetition is how you learn.
So first off, mindfulness can help you stay grounded.
When betrayal triggers a fight or flight response, mindfulness can anchor you in the present
moment.
By focusing on your breath or bodily sensations, you can calm your nervous system and create
a sense of stability.
Secondly, mindfulness allows you to acknowledge your emotions without judgment.
Like I stated, betrayal can bring up intense feelings and it's easy to suppress or ignore
them.
But mindfulness encourages you to embrace them, to sit with them and helps you to understand
that there's nothing wrong with what you're feeling.
It's a natural response to an undesirable situation.
And from there, an appropriate action may reveal itself, like calling up a friend as
minded.
Third, mindfulness can guide you towards compassion.
And for yourself and eventually for others.
When you're betrayed, it's crucial to practice self-care, to treat yourself with kindness
and to recognize that healing takes time.
Mindfulness helps you cultivate this compassionate mindset.
But betrayal is never easy and the journey through it can be long and challenging.
My buddy that I previously mentioned is going through that journey right now.
And it is a rough one.
But with mindfulness, you can navigate it with greater clarity and resilience.
And of course, I remain available as a support system for him, especially on those really
tough days.
Remember, it's okay to feel hurt, angry or confused.
These emotions are part of the process.
By staying present and compassionate, you can eventually find your way back to a place
of peace and understanding.
Okay, I'm going to stop there for now.
I hope this was helpful.
Please check out the heartache meditation on the app by yours truly.
And as always, if you have any questions, please send them to me on Instagram at K-Sunga
Giskombay.
Or you can email me at askksungaatheadspace.com.
Alright, take care for now and I'll see you back here tomorrow.
Peace.