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Hey, Wowzer fans, Mindy here.
And before we start the show, I gotta let you know that this November, with a special new episode featuring our friends at Circle Round and Terrestrials on Radiolab for Kids,
And don't miss when Elmo from Sesame Street stops by Wow in the World to make us all belly laugh on November 24th.
Oh, but that's not all, Reg.
On December 1st, we are sharing our 250th episode of Wow in the World with all of you.
We think this one is going to be music to your ears.
Literally.
Did I mention it's a musical?
And if you're a member of the World Organization of Wowzers...
Oh boy, do I have a surprise for you.
You can listen to our 250th episode early with me and other members from around the world on Saturday, November 22nd, at 7 pm.
Eastern.
That's right, we are throwing another listening party.
Join us as we dance along to our new songs.
React to the episode with other members in the chat and more.
Grownups.
If you want your wowzer to join this members-only listening party, you can sign up to become a member today at Tinkercastcom.
Slash wow.
Already a member?
Well, you can find the link and password to join the event when you sign in at Tinkercastcom.
Slash wow.
That's it.
It's going to be a November to remember.
But for now, let's get on with the show.
Woo!
Welcome to Wake Up and Wow.
I'm Gail Richard Simmons.
And I'm late for breakfast.
Bob, we talked about this.
The jokes.
All right, sorry.
I'm Bob Ralph Nader and on today's show, T-Rexes.
What's up with those little baby arms?
One paleontologist is on the prowl to find out.
And we'll also meet a short and spicy grandma who will compete in an epic hot pepper eating contest.
Against a pack of wild dogs.
That's right.
She'll be spilling the spicy beans on her competitive eating secrets.
Ooh, I can feel the heat.
Also coming up this morning.
Our wake-up-and-wow spy witness, snoop Dennis, will be bringing us the local scoop.
Dennis will be joined by his ventriloquist dummy, Baby Dennis?
Bob, did you write this?
No, I didn't.
I told you, no jokes, okay?
Gail, this isn't one of my jokes.
Hold on.
Who changed the script?
I did.
Baby Dennis needs an intro.
Yeah, Baby Dennis needs an intro.
Dennis!
Cut to commercial.
Dennis, we've been over this.
You are not bringing that ventriloquist dummy on set.
Oh, come on.
Give the people what they want, Jerry.
Yeah!
Grandma G-Force, I'm looking for Grandma G-Force.
It's time to put her mic on.
Now, what's he talking about?
Oh, it's almost time for you to go on, Grandma G-Force.
On what?
Wake Up and Wow, your favorite morning news and lifestyle show.
Well, huh.
Stop wiggling around, G-Force.
I'm trying to finish getting your makeup on.
I gotta de-accentuate these jowls.
Excuse me?
Grandma G-Force?
Excuse me, producer.
We found her.
Grandma G-Force's is over here.
Oh, there you are.
Okay, Grandma G-Force, time to get your mic up here.
Mind if I just clip this to your unitard?
Yep.
I do.
Super duper.
I'll just, oh, wait, what?
I said I do mind.
This is my lucky unitard.
Oh.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Maybe I can help.
I'm her granddaughter.
Oh, really?
Don't believe her.
She's just always saying that.
Grandma G-Force, he's just trying to get you ready to go live for your TV segment.
Well, when's it gonna be?
Oh, just hang on.
There's a TV over there.
Let me see where they are on the broadcast right now.
Our top story this morning is all about a prehistoric dinosaur known as the T-Rex.
Hey, Gale.
What do you call a big pile of dinosaurs?
Bob, no jokes.
A Tyrannosaurus wreck.
Ugh.
Um now, while scientists haven't solved every mystery about the dinosaurs, There's a lot we do know about the T-Rex, like the fact that it lived in North America and ultimately died out 66 million years ago, during the late Cretaceous period.
We also know that the T-Rex was big, don't we, Gale?
Really, Bob?
Now, how big was he?
No more jokes, Bob.
Oh, fine, Gale.
The T-Rex was real big, massive, over 40 feet long and 13 feet tall.
Ooh, that's tall.
But with arms no longer than a three foot long sub sandwich.
Well, Bob, that's big for a sandwich.
I suppose you're right, but it's small for arms in this case.
More right here on Wake Up and Wow when we come back after the break.
Introducing.
Oh.
Wow, makes you wonder why the T-Rex had such tiny arms and such an enormous body.
I know, Guy Raz.
Just picture it.
A towering beast, 45 feet long with a 5-foot head as big as Grandma G-Force.
Oh.
And then these teeny tiny baby arms measuring in at only 3 feet each.
Wow.
Yeah, that would be like if me, a 6-foot tall human, had...
Five-inch arms like the one on Dennis' ventriloquist dummy.
I know, dummy.
I a baby.
Be quiet, baby.
The show's coming back on.
Welcome back to Wake Up and Wow.
We're talking this morning all about the T-Rex.
The question this hour is why.
Why did the T-Rex have such weak and puny little arms?
Well Gail, scientists have been asking this question ever since the very first T rex fossils were discovered.
Back in 1900, the dinosaur hunter named Barnum Brown found those teeny-weeny little arms and wondered the same thing.
But now a paleontologist from the University of California Berkeley has come up with a hypothesis that could hold the answer.
But before we get to that, our local spy witness, snoop Dennis, will bring us today's neighborhood diary entry.
It's all coming up right after the break.
Dennis, you're on in five.
Oh, that's me.
Mindy, look after baby Dennis for me while I do my segment here.
Ow, why do you even have a ventriloquist dummy Dennis?
Ask Baby Dennis!
Ugh!
Get it off of me!
Oh.
I can't believe they cut to Dennis right as they were getting to the meat of this T-Rex story.
I know.
They love a cliffhanger here.
But actually, Guy Raz, I think I can fill you in on that hypothesis or, as I like to call it, a hypothe-guess, since a hypothesis is an educated guess.
Oh, yeah, I suppose.
Well, if you ever need an uneducated guess, Fingerling here is full of them, aren't you, Fingerling?
Ah, gee, Forrest, keep still, would you?
I'm trying to powder your giant forehead before you go on the TV.
So...
About this hypothesis.
There's a paleontologist who thinks they might know why the T-Rex had such tiny arms.
Well, sort of.
You see, his name is Dr Kevin Padian and he's a paleontologist from the University of California Berkeley.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
I need to see a paleontologist about some issues I've been having in my lower digestive system.
What?
No, Fingerling, that's a proctologist.
Oh, well, what are you talking about?
A paleontologist is a scientist who studies the history of life on Earth through fossils or bones left behind from once-living things.
Oh, so a paleontologist can't help me with my gassy, bloated, farty mouth?
No!
Okay, okay.
Anyhoo, this...
The paleontologist, Dr Kevin Padian, thinks that maybe we've been asking the wrong question the whole time.
Really?
I know it.
Yeah.
Instead of asking why the arms of the T-Rex were so small, maybe we should be asking how having those tiny arms helped the T-Rex to survive.
Huh.
Okay, let's just get these stuck on right about here.
Ow!
What?
Where?
Sticking them?
Fake eyebrows, fingerlinger, making me look like I got a mustache.
That mustache was there when I got here.
So Mindy, now that we know the question, we should be asking what benefits came from the tiny arms and the T-Rex.
Can we get to the hypothesis or educated guess from Dr Padian?
Oh, yeah.
Actually I think I might have the journal right.
It's right here boy, in the scientific journal.
At the Paleontologica Polonica.
Oh.
Where'd you get that?
Well, I've just been using it as a booster in this here makeup chair.
Oh, just give it here, G-Force.
Oh, this is a pretty thick book of science.
Let me see that.
Well, now what am I going to sit on to boost me up?
Oh, there.
Why don't you sit on Dennis' ventriloquist dummies?
You want her to sit on a baby?
Sure.
Well, okay.
Just stick it right there under my rump.
All right.
Oh, well, well.
Oh, the snooping feller ain't gonna like that.
Speaking of Dennis, look, he's live on the show.
Oh, my.
Oh, that's so juicy.
What other neighborhood gossip do you have for us this morning, Dennis?
Gale, enough about the neighborhood.
I actually want to talk to you about that T-Rex you mentioned earlier.
Oh, well, okay.
When I heard you mention those tiny T-Rex arms, I got to thinking all about things that I can do with my arms that a T-Rex can't.
Oh.
And I made a list.
Number one, slap myself in the face.
Oh, but why would you?
Ow!
Oh.
Oh, that hurt.
Ew.
Yeah.
But the T-Rex couldn't do it because it can't reach its face with those little stubbers for arms.
Jerry, this is getting weird.
Can we cut to commercial?
Mm-hmm.
Number two, take off my shirt.
Oh, goodness.
No, no, Dennis, please keep your shirt on.
You see, the T-Rex's arms were once again too short to stretch forward to get its shirt off like this.
I'm stuck.
Now, just give him a moment, Gale.
You can do it, Dennis.
I give up.
Moving on to number three.
Pick up this news desk we're sitting at.
Oh, no.
Now, could the T-Rex do this?
Dennis!
No!
You're breaking it!
You see?
The T-Rex couldn't do any of this.
Because it's ours.
We're little nubbins.
Wake Up and Wow is currently experiencing technical difficulties.
But don't worry, we'll return in just a moment.
Wow.
What just happened?
This is the best show ever.
That's it, Dennis.
You're fired.
And you'll never work in show business.
Right, Jerry.
That's what you said the last three times you fired me.
See you all Monday.
Oh, no.
That boy forgot his baby dummy.
Oh, he'll be back, I'm sure.
But before Dennis got kicked off the air, he made some pretty great points about the T-Rex.
Are you sure about that, Guy Raz?
Yeah, I mean, what Dennis did out there was ridiculous, but when you think about it, so were the arms of the T-Rex.
What do you mean?
Okay, so the T-Rex's arms were not all that functional, right?
Right.
I mean, they weren't long enough to touch and reach its mouth or stretch very far outward or upward.
Oh, yeah.
And its giant head and neck stuck so far out in front that it couldn't even get close enough to anything to pick it up.
So when it came to attacking its prey, those arms must have been pretty worthless.
Oh, worthless, huh?
Well, there you go, Fingerling.
There's something you got in common with that T-Rex.
What?
Worthless?
You call this contouring on your cheeks worthless?
Oh, snap.
I'm beautiful.
All right.
Okay, Kermit C-Force, you are on in five.
Bob and Gale are just going to ask you a couple of questions and then we're going to let some wild dogs loose in the studio and watch you fight over a pile of hot spicy chicken.
What?
Don't worry, folks.
It's just so biz.
Oh, yeah.
And they fired Dennis for lifting the news desk in the air?
Wait a minute.
Actually, I just realized something.
Well, there goes our light bulb.
That is very strange.
So just like Grandma G-Force and a pack of wild dogs fighting over a pile of hot chicken...
T-Rexes, who also hunted in packs, did the same with the fresh meat of their prey.
Okay, let me just imagine this scene for a moment.
So we've got a ferocious pack of wild Tyrannosaurus Rexes with enormous heads and massive jaws full of razor-sharp teeth.
Oh, yeah, I see it.
And now the pack of Tyrannosaurus rexes have surrounded a fallen Triceratops that, at this point, is looking a lot like fresh lunch.
Oh, no!
And as they go in for the attack, their watery mouths are snapping open and shut.
And their teeth are gnashing and crashing against any meat they can sink them into.
Quick!
Someone change the channel!
Ah!
True.
Well, now that's one way to lose a limb.
What?
Well, how do they know they're not eating their own arms off?
Or each other's arms off?
Well, that's simple.
Their arms are simply too short to... Wait a minute.
There goes that light bulb again.
Yeah, I don't like it.
Go on, Guy Raz.
Is it possible that the T-Rex's tiny arms actually helped it to survive an eating frenzy with a pack of other T-Rexes?
What do you mean?
Well, because its arms were so tiny, maybe they couldn't be ripped off by other hungry dinosaurs.
Ah, thinking like a paleontologist, Guy Raz.
What?
Mr. Razzy is thinking like a fart doctor?
No, Finger Link, for the last time, that's a prop.
Paleontologist?
He's talking about a paleontologist.
Oh.
No, no, just hear me out, okay?
I mean, why would the T-Rex have arms that were basically worthless?
I mean, they couldn't even use their arms to catch their prey.
But maybe they were meant to have short arms to stay safe during a feeding frenzy.
You know, with all those gnashing teeth and snapping jaws.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Wow.
Okay, I like where you're going with this.
Go on, Guy Raz.
So just imagine if the T-Rex had arms that fit the size of its body.
In the middle of a feeding frenzy, its arms and claws would be in there trying to pull the meat apart.
Well, where do you get a load of me fighting them dogs for that hot chicken?
Uh, but G-Force...
You got normal-sized arms.
Exactly.
I mean, if you put your hands and arms into the mix, Grandma G-Force, there's no telling what those dogs could do to them.
No, Guy Raz is right, Grandma G-Force.
If the T-Rex did this, it would surely have its arms bitten off by the other hungry T-Rexes.
I mean, this could lead to massive bleeding, infection, even death.
Death?
What?
What a big whoop.
Big whoop?
Mandy's got a point, G-Force.
If you go out there and get your arms chewed off by those hot chickens.
Dogs.
What?
Dogs.
Wild dogs.
The hot chickens are what they're eating.
Yeah, that's what I said.
If you go out there and get your creaky old arms chewed off, you'll have nothing left to whack me over the head with when you see that I shaved off your eyebrows.
You what?
Shh, let the man speak.
No.
G-Force, listen to me.
The only way I'm going to let my best old bag of a friend out there with those wild chicken dogs is if you cut off your arms first and leave them here with me, so the dogs can't eat them.
What?
Oh, Fingerling.
Okay, that sounds like a really bad idea.
But Fingerling's right, Guy Raz.
There is no way that Grandma G-Force can just go out there on Wake Up and Wow how she fights wild dogs for hot chicken with a set of full-sized arms.
Have you not learned anything from the T-Rex?
We are not cutting off Grandma G-Force's arms, Mindy.
That's where I draw the line.
Okay, Grandma G-Force, two minutes to show time.
Anything you need before you go on?
Yeah, I'm gonna need some duct tape.
Oh, sure.
Here you go.
Wait, what?
Now, where's that duct tape?
Baby Dennis dummy doll.
Um, you're still sitting on it.
Oh.
Uh, what do you want the doll for?
If I'm gonna go out there and face them wild dogs, I'm gonna need to hide my real arms.
Oh, I gotcha.
Okay, we're going live in three...
Welcome back to Wake Up and Wow.
I'm Gail Richard Simmons.
Our next guest is a pro wrestling spicy pepper eating world champion who's ready to take her leotard to new heights.
What you're about to see may be disturbing.
Okay, Miss C-Force, you're going on in one minute.
Mandy, you got them baby dummy doll arms for me yet?
No.
Hey Guy Raz, how about I hold one end of the baby Dennis ventriloquist dummy, and you hold the other and we pull them off at the same time?
Got it.
On the count of three.
One, two, three.
Yes, we did it, Mindy.
We ripped the tiny arms off baby Dennis.
Great teamwork, buddy.
And look, they squeak.
Oh, that's pretty cute.
Get them dummy decoy arms taped to my unitard here.
I gotta fool them dogs.
Okay, I'm taping, taping, taping.
And one staple for good luck.
I'm ready for battle.
All right, Ms.
Speed Force, it's time.
You're on.
And it's now time to welcome for the first time to the Wake Up and Wild Studios...
Grandma G-Force.
So, Grandma G-Force, tell us what is the secret to going tooth to tooth with wild dogs in a hot chicken eating competition.
Well, first and foremost, it's all in the arms, boy.
Oh, and mind if I squeeze your muscles there?
Just a ho-ho while they squeak.
Oh, that's cute.
Didn't expect that one, Bob.
Certainly not.
Hey, Grandma G-Force, why do you have such cute squeaky little arms?
Seems a little bit odd.
Well, maybe you're asking the wrong question, Bob.
Maybe you should be asking how these little baby arms are gonna keep Grandma G-Force alive during the battle Bob.
Maybe keeping my real arms out of the We'll keep them dogs from gnawing them off, Bob.
You keep saying my name and it scares me and I love it.
Well Grandma, G-Force to demonstrate how you do it.
We've brought in the spiciest hot chicken in town.
We sure did.
Cue the chicken.
And let's bring out those wild dogs.
Well, they do look hungry.
They sure do.
Are you ready, Grandma G-Force?
Ready.
Okay, then.
On your mark, get set, eat that pile of hot chicken.
Come here, hot chicken.
I'm gonna eat you all.
Oh, goodness gracious.
Yeah, she's really got her head in the game.
But look, Guy Raz, those little baby dummy arms that we taped to her unitard.
They're not long enough to get into the pads of any of those hungry dog mouths.
It's working.
Wow, she is really going at it.
I didn't know she could eat that fast.
Careful, T-Force.
Don't eat the dogs.
Oh, Matt.
And there you have it folks, it looks like we have a winner.
Oh yeah!
Grandma G-Force looks to have eaten the vast majority of the hot chicken.
And the wild dogs are cowering in a puddle of their own fear.
I'm the best at this.
Thanks for joining us, folks, for this morning's edition of Wake Up and Wow.
I'm Gail Richard Simmons.
And I'm Bob Ralph Nader.
Be sure to join us tomorrow as we share the top ten ways to use a hot dog bun around the house.
Until next time, have a wow-turfle day.
Oh, Jerry, can we change that line?
It does not roll off the tongue.
And we're clear.
Great job, Grandma G-Force.
That was amazing, Grandma G-Force.
Now, who's taking me to breakfast?
I'm so hungry I could eat a horse.
Uh... first we gotta get those baby arms back on Dennis' little dummy doll.
Well, you'll have to fat me for them first.
Put them up, my darling.
Ah!
T-Force, win it!
Ah!
Oh, yeah!
Let's go, Guy Raz.
It's time for us to get out of here.
You know Mindy, I know we now have a hypothesis that the T-Rex's small arms helped it to survive feeding frenzies.
But
How will we ever know for sure?
Well, we might not, Guy Raz.
I mean, it's pretty tough for even the best scientists to prove a hypothesis after 66 million years.
Yeah, it's amazing that we're still able to learn anything new about dinosaurs after that much time.
But Dr Padian is hoping that we could get closer to the answer by asking museums to examine the T rex fossils in their collections and specifically to look for any bite marks.
And if they find bite marks on the heads rather than the tiny arms, then maybe there could be some truth to this hypothesis.
Yeah.
I mean it might not be enough for the whole truth, but it could tell us if we're asking the right questions.
And it could definitely show that it's time to start looking at the function of the T-Rex and its tiny arms in a whole new way.
Mindy!
Guy!
I accidentally left baby Dennis behind in the studio.
Do you know where he is?
Did you bring him with you?
It's baby G-Force now.
Ah!
G-Force, no!
Oh, yeah.
Don't worry, feller.
I know a good proctologist that'll get him back together in no time.
Oh, baby Dennis!
Why?
Loud in the World will be right back.
This message is for you.
Our Wow in the World toys help your wowzer learn about their world through play.
Plus, you can hear exclusive audio content from me and Guy Raz to help your wowzer discover even more wows.
Grownups.
Give the gift of wow and wonder this holiday season with our latest Wow in the World toys designed with your curious wowzer in mind.
You can shop our Wow in the World toys at Tinkercast.com slash toys.
That's Tinkercast.com slash toys.
I'm from Monmouth, Oregon.
And my wow in the world is that the Greenland shark can live for over 500 years.
Say hi to Dennis.
Hi there.
Reggie.
Bucky.
And the sleigh cat for me.
Bye.
Hi, I'm Azeem Gairaz.
My name is Ian.
And I'm Claire.
And our wow is Oh, and we live in Lake Forest Park, Washington.
And our wow is that some sand dunes make mysterious noises like whistling, singing and the croaking of a frog.
Say hi to the sleigh cat, Thomas Fingerling, Dennis, and Reggie.
And Baby D. Hi, Mindy and Guy Love.
My name is Scarlet.
Five years old.
And my name is Logan, and I'm seven years old.
We live in Utah.
My wow in the world is that starfish don't have brains.
And my wow is that jellyfish don't have brains or bones or hearts.
Isn't that wonderful?
And also, hey, Reggie, I have a question for you.
Hey, Minion Girls.
My name is Elena.
I'm eight years old, and I'm from Edmonton, Alberta.
My wow in the world is that scientists have figured out how to unboil an egg.
And say hi to Dennis and Reggie for me.
Hi there.
I'm Indian Guy Ross.
My name is Mason, and I live in South Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
My wow in the world is it is impossible to tickle yourself.
Isn't that awesome?
Bye.
Oh, and also, say hi to the rest of the Blonker Balls group for me.
Well, I mean, that goes without saying.
End of messages.
Wow in the World is written by Mindy Thomas and Tom Van Kalken with help from me, Guy Raz.
Original sound design and music editing is done by our senior producer Jed Anderson and Tyler Thull.
You can also hear Jed Anderson in the voices of Dennis Thomas Fingerling, Reggie and many of the other silly characters you hear on our show.
Jessica Bode keeps our facts straight as our fact checker and Meredith Halpern-Ranzer powers the wow at Tinkercast.
Our theme song was composed and performed by three-time Grammy nominees, The Pop-Ups.
Find them at thepopups.com.
Special thanks to the rest of our team of tinkerers, including Anna Zagorski, Rebecca Caban, Kit Ballinger and Henry Moskal.
To keep the wows rolling, visit us at tinkercast.com.
There you can learn more about becoming an official member of the World Organization of Wowzers.
Learn more about upcoming events.
Shop our shop and pick up a copy of our new number one New York Times bestselling book, The How and Wow of the Human Body.
Grownups, you can follow Wow in the World on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter at Wow in the World.
And our email address is hello.wow.
And if you're a kid with a big wow to share with us, call us at 1-888-7-WOW-WOW for a chance to be featured at the end of our show or an upcoming episode of Two What's and a Wow.
Thanks again for listening, and until next time, be fun wowing!
Wow in the World was made by Tinkercast. and sent to you by Wondery.
