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Hi, it's Andy here and welcome to radio headspace and to Wednesday morning.
I had the good opportunity to sit down with an incredible young woman called Alison who is facing terminal cancer.
And as part of that she's exploring life, she's exploring her own life, she's exploring the lives of others through the lens of having no time to waste.
It was an incredibly inspiring, for me like incredibly inspiring conversation I feel like there is nothing like that sense of urgency to sort of narrow the focus of what is important and what's precious in life.
We got into a conversation about cancer, cancer myself a number of years back and we were talking about the journey of that.
I was very very fortunate by comparison and had operation went into remission and everything else and thankfully hasn't come back.
For her it's a very different situation where she's gone into remission at times, it's come back, she's kind of thought it was gone again and it's come back again and it's been incredibly persistent.
She's really sort of come to terms with this idea that it's not necessarily going to disappear and we got into a conversation not only about the journey of cancer but also the philosophy of the approach and look really easy for those of us who aren't facing a terminal diagnosis really easy to sit there and wax lyrical on what kind of philosophy might be and I can say
prior to having cancer like I may have had one idea about how I might approach it and retrospectively I look back and think actually in that situation kind of feels a little different you know but we were talking about it and I was blown away by her approach and her philosophy but we got into something very particular about the idea of how to approach cancer or any kind
of illness or pain this way in a sort of a skillful way approaching it perhaps with love rather than hate perhaps with a sense of patience rather than impatience perhaps with a sense of acceptance rather than resistance.
You know very often they're so frequently talked about in in the world of cancer but we talk about being a survivor of cancer we talk about fighting it and beating it and look for many people those philosophies and those ways of thinking they work and I'm not suggesting for a moment that if they don't work and we shouldn't kind of use them out of course it is such a personal
thing and each of us have to find a way of approaching it a way that works for us based on our own experience in life but definitely when I received that diagnosis the idea of fighting it in the mind if we are fighting something then there's a sense of you know an enemy in some way that the very least is a sense of conflict because if we're fighting something we want to beat that other
thing and I think when there's conflict in the mind there's tension in the mind and when there's tension in the mind there's tension in the body I'm not sure it necessarily creates a space that is conducive for healing in the body I could be wrong and there will be many many examples of people who have had that mindset who have recovered and are well and well aware of that but I
just wonder what would happen if rather than we thought about sort of beating it instead there was a sense of okay how can I create the conditions in my body and in my mind to allow healing to take place because ultimately the idea of beating something in our mind at some level there is a sense of wanting to take control and a feeling that if we can control it in some way
then we can define the outcome but my own experience of being in that situation was that I had no control ultimately nature would decide of course I chose to have an operation I chose treatment and everything else but beyond that there was a feeling that it was out of my control and that all I could do in fact the only thing I had any control over was creating the conditions
for healing to take place and I happened to think that it's not in tension it's not in fighting it's not in hate it's in love and it's in acceptance and creating a space and I know that's easier said than done and as Alison and I talked about this the other day she was like but surely you didn't just sit there and accept it and look I was definitely challenged in the were days
when I would cry and when it was it felt too much and I felt overwhelmed but there was no point where I kind of felt that ultimately I would get to decide what the outcome would be if meditation can help us in just one area of our life it's in being okay with not knowing it's being okay with uncertainty knowing that we can't control everything in our life and that may impact
us in an everyday situation or scenario or it may come into play in a really different really difficult and challenging aspect of our life either when I went through the one Alison's kind of going through now and hers is a far more serious kind of situation but I feel like if we can bring a bit of that philosophy into our everyday life then essentially we're training
for those more difficult times in life so if you can if you're able to as you go through your day today just allowing I guess a sense of letting go of control a sense of being more at ease with not knowing ultimately of resting in uncertainty I hope you have a great day today thanks for listening I look forward to seeing you back here tomorrow
