Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners, Lee here.
Have you ever seen one of those guys that seem like they work out a lot?
Well, today's story is about that kind of guy and the revenge taken upon him by the inanimate objects that like him the least gym equipment grown-ups.
Guess what?
Until our new season debuts, you can get twice as many new stories on your feed by subscribing to story pirates creator club plus.
Subscribers get the ad-free version of the show and premium members even get to participate in a quarterly video meetup with lee and peter, where we create a brand new story together for the podcast.
But most of all, creator club members help us support the cost of the show so we can keep bringing it to you every week If you're already a Creator Club member.
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Today's brand new story and a special message about the upcoming season coming up.
After a few more words for the grownups.
I'm very different from everybody.
Confusion is the step before curiosity.
Okay, that's a really funny idea.
We have to send that in.
I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling.
I believe all the things in my story.
Human beings are just able to create.
Welcome back to the Story Pirates podcast.
Did you know that some people actually do go to the gym to work out at midnight?
Like when everyone else is asleep?
Yeah, it's true.
And today's new story is about one such person.
Here are the authors to introduce it.
Hi, I'm Naomi and I'm 10 years old.
And I'm Max and I'm 8 years old.
And we're from Canada.
This is our story.
Excessive Workout Guy and the Revenge of the Gym Equipment.
Another successful day here at 1440 minute fitness, the only fitness gym that's open all 1440 minutes of the day.
Bark, you said it, rufus.
Well, it's 11 pm.
Time for me to clock out and leave you a normal dog in charge.
Bark, take good care of the gym equipment while i'm gone and watch out for excessive workout guy.
You know the guy who comes every night at midnight and works out excessively.
I'm sure you'll handle it.
See you in the morning.
Bark!
She's gone.
At last, the gym equipment and I can talk.
Good, because we have to figure out what to do about Excessive Workout Guy.
Barbell, is he really that bad?
Yes, he always slams me to the ground excessively.
Treadmill hates him too.
I sure do.
He sets my speed way too high.
Well, at least he doesn't excessively swing on you.
I'm the monkey bars, not the gorilla bars.
You think you have it bad?
Dad, try being me, a trampoline.
Last time, he jumped on me so excessively that he almost broke my springs.
He's so excessive.
Easy now, my poor little springs.
Maybe we can steer him away from all of you by keeping him busy on the climbing wall.
No way.
Did you hear the thud he made when he landed on me?
Don't get me started on the excessive climbing up and down.
Everyone, calm down.
I swear on my mother's favorite rawhide chew, I will handle Excessive Workout Guy!
Good, because he's going to show up at the stroke of midnight.
Oh no!
Hello, empty gym.
I'm Bob, and I'm here to... work out.
Hello, silly guard dog.
You can't stop me.
First, the barbells.
Rufus, he lifted me so suddenly!
Help!
Did somebody say something?
Nah, I'm probably just imagining things.
Excessively!
Back to my reps.
Ouch!
I'm dizzy.
Now, the treadmill.
Should I set this thing to 100%?
Bark!
Bark!
That would be excessive.
Which is why I'm gonna do it!
Treadmill!
Hey, this treadmill's making weird noises.
I better run faster.
Oh, boy.
Now I run!
All right.
Next on the list, the monkey bars.
Here I go.
Monkey bars.
My bars.
Stuck the landing.
Next, I'm going to jump off the trampoline and onto the climbing wall.
And jump.
I'm going to climb up, down, up, down, up, down, and down.
Wow!
Another successful workout for me.
Excessive workout guy.
And no one's here to stop me.
In fact, since no one's here, I can say out loud my only weakness.
Bananas.
Bark!
That's right, dog who lives at the gym.
But you can't tell anyone or do anything about it since you're just a silly dog.
See you tomorrow!
That was awful!
Please, we can't go on like this.
Didn't you all hear?
Excessive Workout Guy told us his one weakness.
What does that mean?
It means I have a plan.
Excessive Workout Guy, prepare to meet an excellent source of potassium tomorrow.
It's almost midnight, and Excessive Workout Guy should be here any minute.
Then we will have our revenge.
I'm back!
Time to work out!
First up, the barbell.
He's headed right for barbell, Rufus.
Good, because I put banana all over it.
All right, here I go, barbell.
There's banana on this barbell.
Mama mia, that hurt.
Well, since I didn't get a good barbell workout, I'd better work out extra hard on the treadmill.
Nope, I don't like the sound of that.
Remember the plan.
I think I'll set the treadmill to 100%.
Bark, bark, bark, bark.
What is it, dog?
Are you trying to tell me there's free protein shake over there?
He's not looking.
Time to change those settings to banana.
Hey, that wasn't a protein shake.
Wait a minute.
Somebody set this treadmill to... banana?
He hit that yoga ball dead center.
Oof, tough landing.
Right on the butt.
And my booty.
Well, thanks for nothing, treadmill.
Moving on, the monkey bars.
Up I go.
Someone put banana oil all over these monkey bars?
That's it.
I'm going to the last station, the trampoline and climbing wall combo.
And it better not be cursed like the others.
It's not working, Rufus.
Just wait, Barbell.
The plan will work.
Let's see.
No bananas on the trampoline.
No bananas on the climbing wall.
No bananas anywhere.
Just the gym dog.
Who's a little puppy wuppy?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, gentle yentl.
No need to rage at me.
I'll just continue with my excessive workout business.
Time to jump on the trampoline.
Jump.
I am Bob, the excessive workout guy.
Springs, time to let go.
Here we go.
Jump.
The trampoline is tearing.
Oh, yuck!
I landed in a banana tar pit?
Who would put a banana tar pit under a trampoline?
Mark!
It was me.
You can talk?
We all can.
What?
I put the banana tar there because you have been working out too excessively.
And so we were forced to play all these banana pranks on you to teach you not to use gym equipment so aggressively.
Okay, that is a lot to process, but if my workout style isn't appreciated here, then i guess i will leave and never come back.
You, my friend, have lost yourself a customer.
Oh, that was not the reaction i was expecting.
I thought you'd all like apologize.
Can you at least help me out of the banana tar pit?
No, but maybe the gym owner will help you out when she returns tomorrow morning.
Tomorrow mor- Good morning, Rufus.
I'm back.
Bark!
Bark!
And I'm sure you took great care of the gym and customers.
Hey, wait a minute.
Is that excessive workout guy over there stuck in a banana tar pit?
Somebody help me!
Bark!
Eh.
You probably had your reasons.
I sure did.
Yeah, you... Wait, you kicked the end!
We'll be right back after a few words with the grown-ups.
Hey, guess what?
Season 8 of the Story Pirates podcast is right around the corner, and we need your new stories.
So right now is a great time to sit down and finally write that story that you've been thinking about.
You know, that one.
The one that's so weird, so silly and so bizarre that it just makes you kind of giggle to yourself when you think about it.
Remember, stories can be as short or as long as you want.
And though we can't put every story we get onto the podcast, we do respond to every single story we receive.
Grownups can submit stories at storypirates.com.
We can't wait to read what you've been cooking up.
That's it for today's episode.
Thanks for listening and a big thanks to today's authors, Naomi and Max.
We'll be back next week with more brand new stories.
Until then, stay creative and stay kind.
Bye!
The Story Pirates Podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios.
Executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka.
This episode was produced by Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller, and Lee Overtree.
Recording, sound design, and mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City.
Theme song by Bobby Lord.
Roll call theme by Andrew Barbato.
Musical scoring by Jack Mitchell.
Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin.
Excessive Workout Guy and the Revenge of the Gym Equipment was written by Alexis Simpson and features performances by Alec Brown, Christina Groth-Peach, Hallie Haas, Tara Halpern, Nehemiah Marcos, Peter McNerney and Harry Wood.
Oh, hey, it's me, the opposite of Excessive Workout Guy, here to work out, I guess.
Or I could not.
Workout?
Okay, okay.
I'll work out a little bit.
Here we go.
There.
I lifted my phone.
Hello?
Yes.
Yeah, I'd like to order one large pepperoni pizza, please.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Thanks.
