Welcome to the Listening Time podcast.
Hey everybody, this is Connor and you're listening to episode 177 of the Listening Time podcast.
I hope you're doing great and that your English learning is going well.
And in today's episode, we're going to talk about a very important topic, in my opinion, which is being content Now.
Being content right now, in the present, instead of just waiting for the future, waiting for something to happen in order to be content.
I think that this is a very important topic because if we can understand this and really believe that we can be content right now, then that can definitely change our lives.
And the reason why I wanted to talk about this, this topic in particular, is because I think that many people face this issue, myself included, where we look forward to some future point When something will happen, we believe, and then, after that thing happens, then we're going to be really content.
We're going to be really happy when that thing happens.
And of course that's a good thing to look forward to things in the future and have goals that you want to accomplish.
That will give you satisfaction.
But we don't want to feel discontent now before we've reached that goal.
I don't think we should just always assume that we're gonna be happy later when we have that thing, when we accomplish that goal, etc.
And we aren't happy now, for example.
I think it's important to be content now, be content with what we have, be happy with where we are and, of course, look forward to the future.
But I don't think we should really just live with this idea that, oh, it'll be better later.
It'll be better later.
I'll be happier later.
I think that we can definitely be content now.
So I want to talk a little bit about that today.
And hopefully this episode will be interesting for you.
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Alright, let's get started.
Are your ears ready?
You know what time it is.
It's listening time.
Okay, let's talk about being content now.
So what is the tendency that a lot of us have?
The tendency that a lot of us have is that we have this idea in our mind that when something happens, when this specific thing happens in the future, then I'll truly be happy or I'll truly be content.
So someone might say, When I get that job that I've been wanting, then I'll be happy.
Or when I get a raise, when my boss decides to pay me more, then I'll be content.
Or once I finish my studies, then I'll be happy.
Or whatever.
You could think of a million things that people might say and think this way, right?
So for me, I've had a lot of times in my life when...
I wasn't really completely content in that moment because I wanted this other thing to happen in the future.
And I thought that when that thing happens, then I'll be 100% content.
And that just happened. never really happens.
I'll give you some examples of that.
When I was a teenager, especially when I was about 17 years old or so, I was really looking forward to having my independence as an adult and And I really just didn't enjoy my last year of high school that much because I just thought that when I became an adult independent, then I would be really happy, because I wasn't that content with my life anymore in my last year of high school and I just spent so much time looking forward to my adult life and thinking about it, planning for it.
And then I became an adult and things didn't just magically become perfect and my life was still full of issues and problems and I didn't suddenly become super happy when I became an adult.
I also kind of had this feeling before I moved to Mexico.
I was in college and I really didn't want to be in college anymore.
I was just waiting to graduate and I really wanted to move to Mexico.
And I just had that idea in my mind that when I move, then everything's going to be much better.
I'm going to be much happier.
I won't be in this college anymore.
And I
Yeah, it was great to move to Mexico, but again, I didn't magically just become super happy and content with everything.
That didn't happen.
And then the same thing happened with moving to the U.S.
When my wife and I were dealing with her immigration process, that was awful.
It was terrible.
And we were just looking forward to the day when when it would be over.
And I remember the day that she got her permanent residence card.
I was so happy.
I was so glad.
And then afterwards...
I kind of just continued on with my life and my problems and everything else just continued in the US.
And I didn't magically become 100 content and happy just because The immigration process was over and we were in the US.
And even my most recent example of this, of the fact that now I can make this content for English learners and have this be my career.
Before, I really wanted to have success with this so that I could focus 100% of my effort on this.
And I thought that when I reached this point, when I could just do this and not need to do other things to earn a living, that that would be perfect, amazing.
I thought that that was such an amazing idea in my mind.
And yes, I'm very happy with what I do nowadays and the fact that making all of this content and helping people with my podcast and my YouTube channel I'm really happy that this can pay my bills and this is my job now.
I'm really thankful for that.
But I still have a life with problems and issues and other things that haven't gone away, even though I've achieved this goal.
So what am I saying with all of these examples?
Well, we have this tendency a lot of the time to think that when we achieve this certain goal, problems and issues that we have now won't be there at that time, or they'll be there, but it won't matter, because you'll have achieved that other goal that will really help you be content.
And this just never happens.
It's not something that I think ever happens like that.
I think that this is a big deception.
I think that we deceive ourselves into thinking that we'll be happy when these specific good things happen.
We'll be content when we reach something these certain milestones or these goals.
And it's a deception, because we sometimes reach these goals, we achieve these things, and then things continue on and You're still not perfectly content.
And then you just look forward to the next thing.
It's like for the business example.
But then now you're not satisfied with, you know, how much money your business is making you.
And now you think, oh, no, when I have this amount of revenue, then I'll be happy.
And then you reach that amount, and then you do the same thing and say no, when I reach this amount.
And you just keep going, pushing this goal back, and you don't ever feel content with what you have now or where you are now.
And I think that's a big problem.
I don't think that we should deceive ourselves into thinking that contentment will come when we reach a certain milestone, a certain goal.
We achieve a certain thing.
Those things are good But that's not what will ultimately make us happy forevermore.
No, it doesn't work like that.
And so what are some things that we can do?
What are some things that I've tried to do to not have this tendency?
Because, just like many of you, I've dealt with this issue, like I mentioned.
So now I'm fully aware of this deception and And I try my best not to fall into this trap of not being content with things now and thinking that I'll be more content later.
I'm trying not to fall into this trap.
So here are some of the things that I'm trying to do.
So number one, this is an obvious one.
I try to just be really thankful and I thank God for what I have right now.
And I do this all the time.
This is really important in my opinion.
You should always just remind yourself of everything you have now and be thankful for these things.
So I thank God for everything I have right now.
And when I go through the list of all the blessings I have, it's overwhelming.
And I think, wow, I should be really content right now because look at everything I have.
So that definitely helps when you can just be thankful, practice gratitude.
That's an obvious one that I think we should all do.
We can all benefit from.
We can benefit from practicing gratitude, being thankful for what we have.
And kind of similar to this.
One thing that really helps me stay content and not start to fall into that bad tendency is I specifically take time to look back and see all the things that I was hoping for, that I was waiting for in the past that have now happened, that have now come to pass.
When something comes to pass, we're saying that it happens, it occurs.
So there are so many things that I hoped for, prayed for, that actually happened.
And it's easy afterwards to just forget about all those things.
So I think it's important to take time to look back and see all those things that you were really hoping for and waiting for that actually happened.
And that kind of renews gratitude.
You feel that gratitude in a fresh way when you think back to your life before and then, how you were able to get that blessing, achieve that goal or whatever, and it's good to remind yourself of and to remember how much you wanted it before and then you got it.
And now you should be really thankful because imagine if you never got that thing.
Like for me.
For example, imagine if my wife had never got her residency in the US.
I think about that sometimes and I think about just how that would have really negatively affected my life just considering the last year and a half or so that we've been here.
How things would have been so different if she hadn't gotten that residency.
And I just feel a huge sense of gratitude.
And I remember how much I was hoping for that and praying for that.
And just taking some time to think about that really kind of makes me feel content right now.
Like, wow, I'm so fortunate.
I'm so blessed that we got through that period because that was something that we really wanted.
We really needed.
And it happened.
And I don't want to forget that.
I don't want to just forget, pretend like that never happened.
So that's an example i can give and i'll think about my own business, so to say.
Sometimes, and when things are a little bit complicated or i'm facing some problems uh, with my business, uh i stop And I remember myself two years ago, three years ago or whatever.
And I think wow, I'm really thankful that I've reached this point, considering that I was not at this point two years ago or three years ago.
And when I remind myself of that, when I take the time to look back and remember that, that really helps me to feel thankful again, to feel content with what I have right now, regardless of the problems and the issues that come up with, you know, related to being an entrepreneur or whatever.
Just being able to look back and see the progress, see how I've been blessed, that really helps put things into perspective and it helps me just have a good attitude and be content.
And, And another thing that really helps me just appreciate my life, be content now instead of just thinking about the future and wanting something to happen so that I'll be happier or whatever, is when I consider other people that are suffering more than me and have problems that i don't have.
I think this is like a good comparison.
A lot of times it's not healthy to compare yourself to other people, But I think that this is a good type of comparison.
I think it's good to look at other people that have problems and issues and sufferings that you don't have, so that you can appreciate your own life.
And hopefully it helps.
You have compassion on those other people And you can look at them with compassion and love and view your own life from a different perspective and think about how much worse things could be for you.
I think that's a good way to put it.
Imagine how much more suffering you could have right now, how much worse your life could be.
Think about that.
And let that just really make you feel content with what you have right now, even if it seems like you have problems or you have suffering.
I think that...
Looking at other people, other people's lives, things that other people are going through that thankfully you're not going through now.
That can really help you kind of stop complaining and it can help you be more content now.
Another thing that I think can help and that has helped me is to have low expectations.
Of course, we want to do great things and have ambitious goals.
But I think if we lower our expectations, then we aren't constantly disappointed by things that don't meet our expectations.
I think that if we don't expect much, then we can be content with little.
We don't have to receive a ton and achieve a ton in order to be content.
I think we should try to get better, achieve, progress, of course.
But if things don't go our way, this means that things go badly.
The good things don't happen to us, right?
If things don't go our way, then we won't be as disappointed if we already have low expectations.
So we should have ambitious goals for ourselves, but maybe we shouldn't have really high expectations for everything that we want to receive.
And we shouldn't always expect to have the best of everything, because in this life there are always things that that aren't going to be good, that happen to us.
And if we expect to have some suffering, expect to have some negative things happen to us, then we'll be able to endure and withstand these negative things.
When you withstand something, It means that you endure it, you support it, and survive it.
So it's easier to withstand the negative things when your expectations aren't too high.
And when your expectations aren't too high, then what happens is that things exceed your expectations a lot more frequently, right?
And it feels really good when you aren't expecting that much.
You aren't expecting to earn so much money, but then you do earn more money.
It feels great.
It feels a lot better than when you feel like you deserve this high amount of money and then you don't get it.
That feels awful right.
So that's another little tip.
And then one last thing is that I think it's important to view contentment, to view happiness as a choice and not a goal.
We have the choice to be content.
Even with the negative things in our lives, we can choose to be content.
We don't need to view it as a goal that we will eventually achieve when these other good things happen.
No, we can be content right now if we make that choice.
This is something I constantly tell myself.
Connor, you have the choice to be content right now in this situation.
Even if things aren't good right now, you can still choose to be content instead of just saying oh, when this problem is over, then I'll be content.
No, I can choose to be content now, right?
Okay, I hope that this episode was interesting for you and that it got you thinking a little more about this idea.
You might not agree with 100% of what I said.
That's perfectly fine.
But these are things that have been on my mind recently, so I wanted to talk about them and i want to encourage you to use my advanced episodes if you're interested in practicing with real english spoken fast, at normal speed.
You can sign up by clicking on the link down below and becoming a listening time family member, and you can also sign up for my us conversations podcast, because that's the next step after that to be able to understand conversations when you're listening to more than one person talking.
That's very important to be able to do that, and so that's why i have that podcast to help you practice with that type of content.
So the link to sign up is also down below, All right.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode.
And I'll talk to you on the next episode of Listening Time.
