All right, Crankin, if you can tune into the Cloud C frequencies, please.
Thank you.
Okay, Joe, do you have your music ready?
Oh, yeah, okay.
All right, and we're live in five.
Four.
Three.
All right, everybody, welcome back to Dear Dobbins.
So great to have you here this week.
Give it up for Joe on the pots and pans.
Yes!
Joe, it's great to see you're away from the eggs, honestly.
Oh, thank you.
I miss them, but I'm happy to be here.
All right, folks.
It is time for another week of advice from your dear old Dobbins.
Let's see who we have gone to frequent in and...
Here we go.
You're live on, dear Dobbins.
Who am I speaking to?
Hi, my name is Choo-Choo Buddy.
Say again?
My name is Choo-Choo Buddy.
Choo-Choo Buddy, like a choo-choo, like a choo-choo train.
Oh, come on, Choo Choo.
Choo Choo Bunny, how are you?
Choo Choo Bunny, I'm doing good, thanks.
How are you doing, Dobbins?
Oh, I'm great.
Thanks for calling in today.
Yes, it's thanks for taking my call.
Long-time listener, first-time caller.
I, um, I'm on Dog Toy Island, and... Dog Toy Island?
Okay, I've never been there.
And um yeah, so I'm a dog toy.
I'm a little pig, but my name is Choo Choo Buddy, but I'm a pig, but Okay.
My question is I can't no dogs.
You know we get dogs that come here and pick out toys to take home and I've never been picked.
And I wonder if there's something that I could do to make myself more appealing to dogs.
So that maybe they'll want to pick me up and chew on me and take me home.
Okay, great question.
And you know what?
I'm sorry, I can't.
First of all, great question, okay?
And actually, more common than you would think, okay?
Really?
There's a lot of people... myself included, who sometimes don't feel like they're, they're picked.
Like people want them, want to hang out with them.
Couple of questions.
What? toys are being picked.
Like, is there a theme?
Is there a pattern that you can see?
Why does it smell like peanut butter are really popular?
Okay.
Yeah, and I'm not really a... I don't really smell like anything.
I smell like hard plastic, because that's what I am.
Okay.
And do you talk to the dogs before they pick you?
I try.
Well, like, they can come in.
You can.
Like, sometimes they just seem to make a beeline for some of them.
And then sometimes, like, especially, oh, also the ones that are made out of, like, fur.
These dogs really love...
Yeah, a lot of times there's like ones that are made out of fur and those guys get like the dogs see those and they're just like right to them.
You know what I mean.
And then there's me that's like, hey, I'm just a cute pig.
Okay, I have a couple of thoughts I'm going to throw out, okay?
And you tell me what you think, okay?
I've got three options for you.
Oh, that's great.
Thank you.
I can't write.
All right.
Have your robot record this and you can play it back.
Okay.
Oh, that's smart.
So, listen.
Option one is cover yourself in peanut butter.
Oh.
That's an easy one.
But is that staying true to who you are?
Or don't mind?
That's for you to know and me to find out.
I have a bit of a peanut allergy.
Oh, you have a peanut allergy?
Yeah, I just think it would be bad if I spread it on my body.
Okay, yeah, don't do that.
Next idea one, it's out the window.
Spreading something else on my body could work.
Some cheeses, some meat.
Okay.
Or getting a friend that has a needle in Fred, okay, to sew some fur on you could be painful.
But... It'd be like getting a tattoo.
It'd be like a... But he's a real bad boy.
Yeah, it could be pretty tough, you know?
Just like a patch of fur that's like... Hey, me?
Yeah, I guess I'm a toy.
Yeah.
You know?
Oh, that's not... Okay.
And I would say, if you go that route, don't act too excited.
You know, be cool, just be like oh hey dogs, i didn't even see you there, i'm part wolf probably, or something like that.
Yeah yeah, hey wolf yeah yeah, okay.
Third option is something i really want you to consider.
Okay, you told me you'd been on the island the longest right, It's time for you to become the ruler, my friend.
You can rule?
You don't need to get picked by a dog.
You know everything, right?
You're like the top of the heap.
You're like the senior, okay?
So you're saying, like, my past is my own?
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
I follow my own.
I pick myself.
Exactly.
Oh oh, i like that.
So then maybe i'm like hey toys, let's get organized, because that's the other thing.
It's just like a big, it's just like a big pile of toys is our exactly.
Why don't we get organized so then that dogs can really see what they're looking at and maybe make some more informed decisions?
Exactly, and you know, with this kind of power You could stop other toys from getting to the place where they feel like you do, you know.
You could make things fair and be like, okay, Dennis, you're a bone.
You know Dennis?
Oh, yeah, well, I met him once.
Oh, he was great, yeah.
He got picked, but then he got returned.
That's what i was about to say.
He wrote me and said he got returned.
Yeah right, so you say dennis, you got returned.
You go to the front of the line, you know, don't put out everything.
Make him feel good, i think so.
You know, he said his letters are getting pretty sad, if i'm honest.
Oh no, that's good to know, because he keeps it all inside.
Know how bones are?
Yeah, very stoic, very stoic.
Yeah, all right, does this help?
It helps so much.
I'm gonna go organize, we're gonna unionize, i'm gonna get some um, you know dividers, not like emotionally, just like for organization, and then i'm gonna really work on this and i'll i'll call you and update you someday when i got this going on.
I would absolutely love that.
Oh thanks dobbins, you really are the best advice.
Well, that's what people say, but i don't know.
All right, thank you so much.
Well Dennis, I said hi.
Okay.
We're going to take our next call.
If, Franklin, you can tune in.
Here we go.
And you're live on Dear Dobbins.
Who am I speaking to?
Bing Bamboo.
Hey, it's Punch Pal.
Oh, Punch Pal.
Did we meet each other about two years at a party?
Hey, now, we sure did.
How you doing, job man?
Hey, now.
It is so good to hear from you.
Gosh, it's been a while.
It has been long time, listener.
First time caller.
I love it when people say that, cos it makes me feel good inside.
I know you've only done a few of these episodes, but I've heard them all, buddy.
I love to hear it.
What's having you call in today, my friend?
Well, Dobbins, as you know, I'm an intelligent fruit punch in a big mobile pitcher.
And I love busting through things to help quit people's thirst.
Yeah, and i'm gonna be honest.
When someone told me like pinch pow is coming and i was like okay, where is he?
And then you burst through the wall at the party, i thought this is unreal.
What a guy.
What problems could you possibly have?
My friend, i know what you're thinking.
Punch pal's gotta have a perfect life, but it's not so great here on thirst island.
What's going on?
Well, i've been banned.
To make it short, I've caused so much architectural damage to the various structures here on Thirst Island they don't want me around anymore, even though I'm super refreshing.
Hey, now.
Full disclosure, I may have hurt some people.
Nothing too bad.
But I may have caused a few buildings to collapse.
Okay.
But can I tell you something?
Every person in that building, their thirst was quenched.
You know what I'm saying.
Listen, i know the feeling of being quenched uh, by your mobile picture and i will say uh, they should be grateful.
But what kind of damage are we talking about?
Mum, first let me check in, because i don't know.
This on your island, is everyone's uh like a receptacle for liquid, or are there different types?
No, man Dobbins I'm like one of a few.
It's mostly just thirsty people on thirsty island.
People are always thirsty, so in my mind, I'm like a hero on this island.
Yeah, let me get in there quenching, i gotta get in there quick, But I don't know.
I'm no architect.
I don't know the difference between a load-bearing wall and just, like, some plasterboard.
I gotta get there quick, and that is my mantra.
Get there quick.
Don't let anything stop you.
So I go through the walls.
Right, and you know what I love about you is you want to help people, right?
And that's what I love about you, Dobbins.
Oh, come on.
No, man, you're the best.
I remember when I served some of me up to you.
You drank it and were like, that's thirst quenching deliciousness.
Hey now.
Yeah.
I even said, hey now.
We said it together.
I remember that.
I remember that like it was yesterday.
It was two years ago.
I remember like it was yesterday.
Yeah, that was fun.
You know, okay, couple more questions before I dip into the advice pool.
Are there other things on the island quenching the thirst of these people or are you the only one? yeah no there's a few others there's a carton kevin he's a carton of strawberry milk delicious uh yeah he uh he slides down the chimney causing no damage he's welcome everywhere okay right because he's like the shape of a chimney so it's just he is a perfectly shaped chimney carton yeah just boom right down no damage look I like the guy.
He's a good guy.
But, hey, milk, thirst quenching, no man too thick.
Especially if you're a singer.
You know it will get on your vocal cords and you can't sing.
So Hey look, I wouldn't say it to his face, but like he's a phlegm-generating monster.
Yeah, right, right.
Okay, and who else is on there?
Is it too many to name, or is it just a few?
Oh, no, no, it's just a handful, and we have a support group, so I know them all pretty well.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Sweet Cindy is a carafe.
Right, right.
Of limeade.
A carafe of limeade.
Now here's the crazy thing.
She goes through the door.
Okay.
She says she is as dedicated to thirst quenching as I am.
Right, right, right.
Right.
Right.
No, man, she's smaller.
I'm the biggest.
I'm the biggest of the bunch.
Okay, okay.
I'm a giant, giant pitcher.
Okay, so I... You think a glass pitcher versus a brick wall, who's gonna win?
This guy.
I just go bunch and I do it.
I like it okay.
Yeah, this makes sense.
Okay so, couple of things.
Um one, i want you to think about something.
Okay, so just walk through this with me.
All right, should i close my eyes and visualize?
Absolutely, that is a great idea, great.
All right, my eyes are just a drawing on the picture, but i can do that.
All right, The clothes.
Think of yourself and feel how much you love to help people.
Oh, yeah, I love it.
Got that feeling?
And think, what is it like when you think of someone being thirsty or hurt?
Ooh, ooh, I don't like it.
Right, okay.
I wish I could run right where you are right now.
What if someone had, let's say, a broken arm and then couldn't lift a glass?
I'd pour myself right in their mouth.
Straight in there.
I'd put my little...
What's the spout?
I put my spout right in the mouth.
Pour it right in there.
That's the kind of guy I am.
Right, right.
If you love helping, and you crashing through buildings is hurting people, okay?
Yeah, okay.
I do not like that idea, Dobbins.
Yeah, we like to help, we don't like to hurt.
Even if we can pour ourselves in their mouth, we want to give them agency to pick up a glass.
But Dobbins, let me ask, I see where you're going with this, but can I ask you a question?
Right.
Isn't thirst the ultimate hurt?
That's where I don't know if we're gonna agree on that, okay?
On Thirst Island, when you land on Thirst Island, there's a sign.
It says, first is the ultimate hurt.
It's like right there when you get on the island.
It's drilled into our pictures from the time we're just baby juices.
And are the humans reading these signs?
Like, do they agree?
Oh, we don't give the humans access to them signs.
It's just kind of like in our landing area path.
Okay, I see the problem.
So you've been programmed one way, but the humans don't know that, right?
Hmm.
So I'm thinking, you said you have a support group.
Is there sort of a leader of the group?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Who's the most reasonable receptacle for liquid?
Well, you know, they're kind of a stick in the mud.
Walter.
It's like Walter without the L. Right, right, right, right.
I don't know if you're familiar with him.
Walter.
I don't drink him much, but yeah.
Oh, man, boring.
Boring.
You think that's going to quench your thirst?
How many fruit flavors has he got?
Zero.
Why does anybody want that?
I don't want to get into it because I would better get to the device, but I would say he does quench thirst.
I'm gonna throw it out there.
Anybody out there listening, don't drink water.
That's too boring.
Fruit punch has got multiple fruit flavors to quench all of your thirst zones.
Right right, you know there's different kinds of thirst and my fruit flavors quench them all.
Punch, I'll tell you.
I think I've got an idea.
I've got advice.
Take it or leave it, okay?
I've got no ears, but I'm listening.
Okay.
Listen.
You talk to Whattle, okay?
Walter the Whattle.
Yeah, there's no L. No L in there, yeah.
Okay, you talk to him and have him have a meeting with whoever is in charge of the people.
First thing you want to do is get on the same page, okay?
What is it that is most important?
Broken bones and blood?
Okay?
So we're sort of getting on the same page.
Number two, we need to talk about you having an entrance that is quick and easy for you to get in.
Right?
Right.
You know, she has the door, she's smaller.
It takes her less time.
He has a chimney, right?
So we need to get a punch-sized entrance to buildings, okay?
That's right, so maybe they could change the building code here on the island.
Exactly.
Third idea, and this is really off the wall.
You stay stationary and have people come to you to drink something.
You just kick back and relax.
Drink up the sun, right?
Hey, now.
I love it, diamonds.
I should have talked to you a long time ago, buddy.
Well, this is just what I do, and I'm so glad to hear from you, my friend.
Glad to hear from you, too.
I'm going to run straight to the clubhouse and tell Walter what you said.
Hey, now.
All right, know how it goes.
Okay Joe, I see you over there licking your lips.
You want some fruit punch right now.
Don't you thinking about a fruit egg punch, and how good it would be for the holidays?
Take out the egg and I agree.
Wonderful.
What a guy.
I'd love to invite him to the ship, but I'm afraid he would break it.
Oh, yeah.
So... Yeah.
Yeah, that's true, Cranklin.
Yeah, that's true.
Okay, I think we have time for one more caller.
Okay.
Uh...
Let's see.
Turning in.
Turning in.
All right.
This is Dear Dobbins and you're on the air.
Who am I speaking to?
Hi.
Is this...
Dobbins?
Oh, boy, okay.
Yes, it is.
Who am I speaking to?
Hi.
Ollie the slob.
Oh, my goodness.
I love sloths.
You know, I've never seen one in person, but you are super cute and cuddly.
Thank you, Dobbins.
You're welcome.
Okay.
So, as quick as you can... Long time caller.
First time listener.
Yeah.
I mean...
Long time listener, first time caller.
Good, great, thank you.
Yeah, episode five and we already have some dedicated fans and I appreciate you.
I appreciate you.
Okay, now I don't want to rush you, but we are... Oh, you are totally fine.
I have all the time in the world.
All right.
Well, jumping in, what is your issue?
What can I help you with?
And just like, you know, sum it up pretty short version.
Okay.
All right.
Well, my friends say I'm pretty slow.
And they finish games before me.
Okay, right.
Go on.
Why?
Well, no, like, and that makes you sad.
You know what?
Let's do a series of yes and no's.
Wait, I still have more to say.
All right, all right.
I'm so sorry.
Okay, go ahead.
If we are playing a game...
I am still going, but they are done.
Do you understand?
Yeah, I do.
Let me explain something more.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No need, no need, no need.
Okay.
Let me ask you this, okay?
Ask away.
Okay.
So the other people or creatures, beings, if you will, that you're playing with are not sloths.
Yes or no?
Well, There are a lot of different animals i play with, like okay, for example.
Oh boy the giraffe okay, so pig.
Do you want me to continue?
Well, as much as I love to hear it, and I don't want to interrupt, okay?
Quick yes or no.
Are there other sloths on your island?
Yes.
Okay.
And why aren't you playing games with them?
I am still making my way to them.
Okay, so you got separated somehow.
Yes okay, years ago.
Oh wow years, okay.
Big islands uh, a slow sloth.
Let me tell you how it happened.
Well, as much as I would love to listen to that because I would, I really would but we're growing a bit.
Short time on the show.
I only have a small window that my captain lets me have a break.
Let me ask you this.
Is there a cheetah on your island?
That, you know, like, near you now.
There is Cherry the cheetah.
Okay, Cherry the Giraffe and Cherry the Cheetah.
I love that.
Cherry the Giraffe and Cherry.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
Okay, okay.
So, the cheetah, do you think it could say, hey?
Can I jump on your back or can I crawl slowly up on your back and you would take me to my sloth family and deliver me there, because I don't know if you know, but cheetahs are quite quick.
Yes, I have noticed that.
So what I'm saying is we could actually solve... Oh, no, go ahead.
Oh, you go ahead.
Okay.
So we can actually... Oh, what?
Sorry.
I don't want to interrupt you.
Oh.
Whoa.
It's hard when we can't see each other, you know, to know who's going to talk sometimes.
Ha.
Ha.
Ha.
Ha.
Okay, so what I'm saying is, we could be solving two problems, okay?
One, you get to be back with your family, right?
And I mean in a way I mean I'm not trying to tell you your priorities, but in a way that might be even more important than the games.
But...
Once you get reunited with other sloths, they'll be playing at the same speed you are.
So if you're playing Parcheesi, for example, you could take days to finish it.
That is correct.
I like Parcheesi.
Right, me too.
You know, it's underrated as a game, honestly.
I don't know why more people don't play it.
I don't either.
We have so much in common.
Should we hang out longer and chat?
Maybe another time.
But what's that, captain?
Yes, i'll be right there.
Yeah, i can't stay.
Unfortunately Did I help you.
So get Cherry the cheetah to take me to my family.
Right, yeah, actually, even Jerry the giraffe could probably help.
Not super slow.
Okay.
Listen, I wish you luck.
And please, just write me a letter, okay?
And let me know when you get reunited with your family, okay?
Okay.
That letter will be sent in a few months. when I'm done writing it.
All right.
Could I make a suggestion on the letter sending?
Yes.
Send it with a bird, okay?
In an envelope.
Put a bird bird in an envelope, i mean, give the envelope to the bird right, give the envelope to the bird right and they'll deliver it to me.
Okay, don't send it with a sloth or a turtle.
You see what i'm saying Okay,
Well, that's a laugh.
Okay.
Thank you and have a good day.
Thank you so much.
Happy to speak with you.
Joe, he reminded me of you, if you don't mind me saying.
Oh, I don't, thank you.
I'm very tender with the eggs.
It takes me a long time to cook them just right.
Yeah, you're both very, like, peaceful.
You know?
Yeah, I've heard I'm very, uh, I'm a calming presence.
Before I came to work on the Skytanic, I used to read a series of lullaby children's books and just send people straight off to sleep.
Did you really?
I did not know that.
You know, I'm so glad we're working on this show together.
I feel like we're going to get to know each other more, you know?
I mean Cranklin and I chit-chat all the time, you and i.
You know we're so busy, so this is lovely.
Yeah, it's pretty nice, you know.
I actually um, i'm looking at the stew pot.
I need to get it back over to the to the galley pretty soon because uh, you know, grub time's coming.
We got a whole plate of eggs to mangle Understood.
I've got to go swab the deck, so I understand.
Listeners!
Thank you so much.
You know this started with me just trying to reach out and chat to people, and now it's become a whole show.
I can't believe it.
It's become so popular that we're actually going to do it once in a while.
So I...
I hope you'll tune in, and that's Dobbins signing off for Dear Dobbins.
Goodbye, Joe.
Bye.
Goodbye, Cranklin.
And we'll see you next time.
This has been Dear Dobbins.
Dobbins was played by Amanda Lee Williams.
Joe was played by Eve Kruger.
Choo Choo Buddy was played by me, Megan Leahy.
Punch Pal was played by Travis Sharp.
Ollie the Sloth was played by Karen Cassidy.
Our producer, editor, and sound designer is Matt Silverman, who also played Cranklin the Robot.
Do you need some advice from Dobbins?
You can leave your question with Cranklin right on our website talesfromthecloudseacom, or call 256-834-5394.
Cloud for key for.
Be sure to subscribe so you won't miss the next episode of Tales from the Cloud Sea.
