The Bill Simmons Podcast is brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network.
We have a new episode of The Rewatchables coming on Monday.
We did a movie called Shampoo, which is a pretty famous movie that had a few Oscar nominations.
It came out 50 years ago.
Warren Beatty, Goldie Hawn, Julie Christie, Jack Warden.
And the reason we did it was because we had a special guest.
It was me and Sean Fennessey and special guest Cameron Crowe.
One of my favorite directors.
We still have not done Almost Famous on the rewatchables, but yet Cameron Crowe is on.
But he brought an unbelievable gift.
We went for over two hours.
We tied it to a lot of his.
If you like Cameron Crowe movies, watch Shampoo and then listen to this rewatchables because it's great.
So that's my first plug.
Second plug.
We're launching.
We're recording it tomorrow afternoon Pacific time, and then it's going to run on Monday night.
Max Kellerman, Rich Paul.
The podcast is called Game Over.
It's going to be Monday, Wednesday, Fridays.
I am really, really excited about this one.
I might even go to the taping tomorrow.
They're going to talk sports, culture, all kinds of things.
And I think this is going to be a really good podcast.
We even got some free PR from Stephen A. That was great.
Thank you for the 29 minutes.
Uh, we, we didn't even have to like purchase it.
It was awesome.
Uh, one thing though.
He did mention me a couple of times.
As you know, I like Stephen A Um, but he wondered why I didn't ask him about what he said about Max when he was on my podcast.
And the reason I didn't ask him was because he was on my, I looked it up.
He was on my podcast in July, 2023.
And then all the stuff he said that I didn't really like was on Joe Budden's podcast two months later, where I I just thought Some of the stuff he said about Max I just didn't like it.
And I would have brought it up, but it was two months after we did the podcast.
So I'm happy to talk about it next time, Stephen A. I'm sure we'll do a podcast at some point.
We can go at it.
We get along.
And thank you for the PR.
Anyway, game over.
Monday, Wednesday, Friday.
Check it out.
Listen to it on Spotify, wherever you get your podcast.
Coming up on this podcast.
I can't wait.
It was an unbelievable football day.
It was a very dramatic Sunday night.
Cousin Sal and I broke all of it down.
We did it live on YouTube.
And it's all coming up next after a break and after Pearl Jam.
But before we do that I have to mention that the Jeff Buckley documentary that we did for Music Box that has been up all weekend.
I really hope you had a chance to watch.
We have three more coming.
I'll tell you about the next one on Tuesday.
But break, Pearl Jam, and then Cousin Sal.
This episode of the Bill Simmons podcast is presented by State Farm.
Having insurance isn't the same as having State Farm.
It's like expecting a linebacker on the football field, but getting a line cook.
Sure, they both can handle the pressure when it starts heating up, but only one is stopping a touchdown.
You wouldn't settle for just anything for your team, so don't settle for just any insurance when it comes to getting help you need.
State Farm is the real deal.
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.
Cousin Sal is here after an incredible Chiefs-Texans game.
Let's start here.
Mike Schur texted in a couple weeks Mahomes may do something.
Brady never did play a meaningless football game.
Ooh.
How about that?
And I went back and I looked, and it's true.
Tom Brady never played a meaningless regular season game.
There were stakes for every game of his career starting in 01.
I thought this was an absolutely momentous Sunday Night Football game.
The Chiefs are going to be out of the playoffs.
I honestly can't believe this.
When you said he's going to do something we've never seen before, I thought you were going to say murder each and every one of his receivers.
Maybe his head coach for some decisions.
It's over, Bill.
The dynasty is over.
We just saw it.
I'm glad to spend the time with you, Mike.
I thought Collinsworth was great tonight.
I thought he had the right level of drama.
So did Tirico.
Drama, surprise.
You could feel the stakes.
The Chiefs.
Three Super Bowl wins, two Super Bowl losses, two conference titles in the last seven years.
You look at it in pro football reference, and it's just like the highest pinnacle of excellence.
And now they might go like eight and nine.
I don't even know.
But they've gone from this...
Probably one of the better seven year runs we've ever seen in the history of the league.
To just, they're done.
I mean, we put them in futures before the year.
It's automatically you put the Chiefs in.
No, they'll make the playoffs.
Yeah.
Put that as seven playoff teams.
They're not going to make the playoffs.
And you go through the 10th now.
It's nuts.
Well, you go through like they've lost to the Chargers the Eagles, the Jaguars, the Bills, the Broncos, the Cowboys and now the Texans.
All teams that have winning records, or in your case, the Cowboys are 6-6-1.
And they beat Baltimore, Detroit, and Indianapolis.
So they're 3-7 against good teams, which leads to the question, was this a good team?
And the answer is probably not.
No, there were a fine average team.
Oh, it's so weird this year because I feel like there are so many average teams and this was for the taken.
Right.
But this game was different.
I felt like than the rest of the ones that you just mentioned, because it really did seem like the receivers.
He didn't have magnificent numbers.
What was he like?
Fifteen four.
14 for 33.
I think Stroud had similar numbers, except he had the touchdowns and Mahomes had the three interceptions, mostly coming off of his own players' face masks and stuff.
But they quit.
I thought the coaches, like, I mean, let's just get to it.
They were winning this game.
Houston blew it the first time, 10-0.
And then it was 10-10 and the Chiefs went for about 10 and a half minutes left.
Fourth and four from their own 20-whatever.
We were texting about it.
They weren't looking to score again.
That was it.
The defense was flying for the Chiefs.
The Texans were in a three-and-out frenzy for the entire second half and did not seem like they could block the Chiefs anymore.
They didn't seem like they could unlock the play calling either.
I was wondering, why are you guys throwing a screen?
They've got seven guys coming on every play.
Why don't you just lob the ball over to Mark?
I didn't understand what was going on and it just felt like the Chiefs' defense was going to win the game.
So you have...
Ten plus minutes left.
It's fourth and one.
They're basically on their 30.
It's a tie game.
It's freezing cold out.
The crowd's into it.
It feels like the Texans are going to turn the ball over at some point over in the fourth quarter.
You can feel it coming.
Sack, strip sack, tip off.
Something bad was going to happen and they went for it, and I don't care if you have Patrick Mahomes.
I just, I'm not doing that.
My defense is the best unit on either team on the field, and I'm home.
My defense is not going to let them score for the rest of the game.
I thought that was one of the worst decisions of the year, not just of the weekend, the year.
And their defense is pretty good, too, which is another reason you don't do it, right?
Right.
And really, it just changed, and I get it.
Everybody goes on fourth and one now.
It doesn't really matter where you're on the field.
I know.
This just felt different just because of the momentum.
And if you don't believe in that fine, but you really felt like Houston was kind of done scoring for the night.
It changed the, Total vibe of the game.
It really was like a Christmas party and people were feeling themselves, they're drinking, maybe smoking a little weed, and someone brings a plus one.
Why are you bringing up Daniel?
Yeah, I didn't bring up Daniel.
Jesus.
And then in comes an FBI agent as a plus one.
Like, oh, this changes everything here.
I don't know what we're going to do here.
Bonehead, bonehead decision.
We've been talking about this fourth and one, fourth and two.
I mean, this has been one of the dialogues of the last 20 years, dating back to Belichick going forward on fourth and two from his own 28 and that Colts game on a Sunday night, which I wrote like a 10000 word column about what happened.
The difference was they couldn't stop the Colts.
And he went for it because he knew if he didn't get it or if they punted, the Colts were just going to come down and score.
And he felt like he had.
This was the only way he could control the game, because if they didn't, they punted it back.
It was over.
In this case, the Chiefs defense was controlling the game.
You don't need to take a risk on offense.
Your defense probably has a better chance of creating something than your offense does, because either Mahomes can't throw deep balls anymore.
You have that piece.
They weren't running the ball that well.
And their receivers were dropping balls.
They were off.
It was freezing cold.
I get it.
And Kelsey's not Kelsey anymore.
That's another thing when you watch the Chiefs.
It happens.
It happens to all the great players.
But he's not Kelsey anymore.
And he was involved in two of the worst plays of this game.
But I just hated it.
And I think when you go for it And the downside is, if we go for this, this team that can no longer breathe and is in a coma, offensively we're basically resuscitating them.
We're giving them a Red Bull.
We're giving them a donut with some sugar in it.
We're lifting them up.
We're giving them a massage.
They're like back.
And they're under 30.
They know they're at least getting a field goal, and it changed the game.
And it was stupid.
And I will fight it to the death.
It was a dumb play.
I don't think you have to fight anyone.
I don't know.
I mean, I guess you have to fight Andy Reid.
That's it.
My money's on Andy, by the way.
He did it again.
He went for it a second time with six minutes left.
Well, that's why you don't do it the first time.
So you don't have to make that dumb decision with six minutes left.
That's exactly why you don't do it.
Put it again.
Stop him.
Your defense is playing great.
I hate to look at everything through the lens of gambling.
It makes me feel kind of bad sometimes, but they were like minus.
That's actually what we do.
Then that's what we do.
But there were minus 340 at that point, like at fourth down.
The only thing that's flipping that is a turnover or.
It was fourth. and one?
When it was fourth and one.
They were minus 340?
They were minus 340.
It was a tie game and they were minus.
Wow.
You talk about analytics and everything.
There should be some nerd on the sideline.
Coach, take a look at the FanDuel page.
You're minus 340.
If we boot this, we're still minus 340.
If we don't get it on fourth and one, we're a plus all of a sudden.
Just disgusting.
Honestly, It's arrogance that's well-earned, because they've had an incredible amount of success the last seven years.
And it was a fuck you move.
We're the Chiefs.
We'll get this.
We've been getting it for two-thirds of a decade.
And it'll be fine.
And it was stupid.
It was the wrong way to play it because your defense was better than your offense in this game.
So you ended that game.
Mahomes had at one point 10 straight incompletions or interceptions.
This is in the fourth quarter.
As they're trying to save their season.
It wasn't like this was a random Sunday night game.
It's like when you go through the teams that are behind, they've lost to the Chargers the Jaguars, now the Texans.
Denver is gone.
That ship sails.
And they've lost to the Bills.
So these are all teams that I know that before the game the political guy was on with Maria Taylor doing all the odds and trying to have the shtick with it.
I don't really understand why they used him.
But he did say if the Chiefs lost, they had a 12% chance to make the playoffs.
To me, it's like a 0% chance.
What scenario are they making the playoffs?
No.
So they have, I think they're plus 340 to make the playoffs, it says right now.
But they have the Chargers at Tennessee, Denver, and at Las Vegas.
It doesn't matter.
They're a game behind Houston, who's not going to stop losing.
They have Arizona and Las Vegas, Houston.
So they're going to get two more wins, plus the win over them, plus the tiebreaker.
They're not making it over Houston.
I feel like the AFC said a little.
We could talk a little.
One more thing about this game.
Disgusting.
And I know you've suffered your bed aches and bad beats today.
I went on the pregame show today and I said I am betting Houston under eight and a half points in the second half, blind betting it like a Phil Hellmuth blind bet.
I'm checking off the flop.
That's it.
That's after the flop.
That's it.
And I was like, Spagnola's done it.
And like the last four home games, they've scored a total of one touchdown and three of them.
This is it.
I had that.
I mean, there's no way I should have lost that.
I'm so mad and broke right now.
Andy Reid lost it for you.
He really did.
Disgusting.
Disgusting.
This was also, the stats won't show it, but I really liked how CJ Stroud played in this game.
And this was a really good game for the anyone.
And we've all had the thoughts like, if Davis smells was playing, is this much different?
But Stroud took some big hits, um, moved around.
He'd never, I don't think he had a turnover.
Um, I had a couple of big third downs.
It just kind of, help them kind of survive a little bit.
Uh, and it was really only at Collins.
I, I didn't, there was a lot about this game.
I didn't understand because the chiefs lost their best cornerback early on.
They lost yet another tackle at the beginning of the game.
And it just felt like wow, if you have the Texans or your Texans fan, this is couldn't have gone better.
Um, and they just you know, it's the old Lombardi bad offensive lines don't travel.
But we've also seen the Texans in this type of game earlier in the season where they just really hard for them to get to like 17 points, which goes back to the read decision.
This is a team that on the road, in bad weather, against a good defense, is just not going to put up 20 points.
Yeah.
And I'm with you with CJ Stroud.
Like he really, I don't want to say he showed me something.
I decided I'm annoyed by that.
Yeah.
He really showed me something today.
It's really a way of saying nothing.
It's like a backhanded cup.
Yeah.
Right.
Showed me, it showed me his coin collection.
It was fine.
But no, you're right.
He was like rolling right on third and long.
And we complete the.
Just when you thought it was like throwing out of bounds, he'd completed for a first down.
And Collins, a lot of times is unguardable.
I think he really is.
So, and he comes back for balls.
He does everything right as a receiver.
If this team had a decent running game or a good running bank, they'd be a lot of trouble for everyone in the AFC.
They might already be.
Well, Decent chance to host a first-round game, right?
They just have to catch Jacksonville, because I think Indianapolis we'll talk about them later, but it feels like Indianapolis is in a lot of trouble.
I don't think they catch them, though.
They're two off of Jacksonville.
I thought they were one off.
What's their record now?
Is Jacksonville 10-4 now?
9-4.
Or 10-3?
9-4, right?
Jacksonville's 9-4, so Houston's 8-5.
Oh, they have 8, right.
Sorry, yeah.
And they play Arizona, Las Vegas.
They're at the Chargers in Indianapolis.
Tennessee is just such an easy win for everyone.
But I hear you.
That's how they'd have to do it.
Well, Tennessee.
I don't know if you watched Mike McCoy's postgame locker room speech.
I missed that one.
What did he do?
He kept his clothes on?
Praised Tony Power.
Talked about how well they ran the ball.
He thanked KFC for, not KFC, Stefanski.
For that weird two-point play he ran and took his hot quarterback off the field.
Yeah, listen.
I was on a Pat's thread today.
And all of us were like, please, God, don't.
We don't want the 2-7 against the Texans.
Right.
Please, no.
I don't want to play them.
I don't want to play their defense.
I just think that's a scary matchup.
Because you have... You figure the Bills...
Either they're going to catch the Pats and take over the AFC East, or they're going to be the five seed would be my guess.
They have probably one more loss than them, but they'll end up probably 12 and five would be my guess.
Right.
And then it's the Chargers, the Colts, the Texans.
Punchers chance of the Chiefs is the other wildcard spot.
But I think the Chargers Texans week 17 is probably for the six seed.
I've looked ahead a little bit here.
That's probably for the six seed, losers the seven seed.
But otherwise, honestly, these playoff positions are kind of set.
I don't know what the numbers are, but Chargers, Texans, Bills, probably the wild cards, right?
Yeah.
I think that's fair.
It's hard because everybody's playing each other.
And then you have in the NFC South, you have Carolina and Tampa playing each other twice.
So it's hard to guess what.
We'll talk about that later too.
I was trying to think of The most shocking.
I can't believe this ended this fast NFL season that I can remember since we were kids.
Because, even like the Cowboys, you made the playoffs that year and you even won a round, and then you lost.
And then the next year you went six and 10.
And the Pats had that last year after they won the last Rams Super Bowl.
When, you know, they played the Titans.
They still made the play.
Did they make the play?
I can't even remember if they made the playoffs or not.
But they had that terrible loss to Rainbow at the end.
The pick six.
Yeah, they were at least in it, and it felt okay.
The last one I can remember was the 1980 Steelers.
Wow.
Remember when they went 9-7?
I don't think they made it.
But it was so stunning as a kid.
Right.
Yeah.
Oh my God, the Steelers are not going to, they'd won four or five Super Bowls.
It's like, it's really over?
Like, it was just like improbable.
And then I'm sure there's kids right now like, oh my God, really?
The Eagles, the Eagles, after they made the Super Bowl, the loss to the Chiefs lost the last six.
Was that the year the next year?
But that wasn't.
Yeah, you're right.
That wasn't early.
So it wasn't like either, you know, a mini dynasty like this was.
That wasn't like a generational team that you know.
We'll remember this Chiefs run for as long as we're following football.
Yeah.
And it wasn't even a big injury.
Like it really wasn't.
You know, if Mahomes goes out week four, you understand, but this is just every game.
Look, they won all the one score games last year and they just can't do it.
They can't do it this year.
So I guess it was the game when it really felt like, and maybe this will determine the playoff standings.
But that stupid Jaguars Monday night game that everyone their brother lost money on and that pick six Mahomes through.
And it just, that was the first time it was like, huh?
Yeah.
Right.
It doesn't feel like a chief season in the same way.
But now you think big picture, like reads about to hit a seventies.
They're going to lose Kelsey.
They've spent all this money on all these dudes that they've moved these contracts forward.
And Chris Jones is in his thirties.
My home's going to be in his thirties now.
So, you know, we've seen teams reset, but it usually depends on the draft.
And putting like two, three drafts.
Like when the Pats did their reset in the 2010s, it was because they hit.
In 2011 and 12 and 13.
They hit a bunch of drafts in a row and were able to rebuild.
So that's going to have to be what they do.
But we've liked a bunch of rosters more than the Chiefs for a while now, right?
Yeah.
Like a bunch of AFC rosters.
Like, oh, I'd rather have 10 other receiving cores than the Chiefs do and the AFC.
And now it's just like, yeah, that's still...
True, and Mahomes has lost a step, and maybe Reid's lost a step and Kelsey's definitely lost a step.
And that engagement is over.
I don't care what anyone says.
Yeah.
Reporting it live right now.
That's it.
Sorry.
It's funny.
Mahomes, I don't feel like has lost anything other than the deep stuff which we've talked about for two years.
Everything else, he still moves around in the pocket.
He still pulls plays out of his ass.
He's still awesome as a scrambler.
He's probably the only quarterback who, when he's in the open, isn't necessarily going to slide.
Alshayer bounced off him today for a really big play that extended a third down.
But the deep balls, and he threw a pick today on one.
It's been an issue for two years, and I don't really understand that.
I don't know if it's healthy or it's like a mental thing or what's going on.
These guys are open on some of these passes.
Some of them.
Some of them they are, and then they just don't get it.
But it was going to be a tight window against this Texans defense on a lot of them.
If you're asked the question, which quarterback do you start a team with?
You're not going to go four five, six before you say Mahomes right.
So I don't want to bury him too much.
No, I was listening to the ringer NBA show or NFL show the other day with Shield and Solak was on.
And they were talking about Drake May and the MVP.
And then they were talking about how many QBs potential, like how big of an asset is he basically?
And it's like, we have this Mahomes, Alan Lamar group.
And it's like, has May moved into that group as an asset.
He's on a rookie contract.
And they were like, Would you trade him for Lamar the way Lamar's been playing?
No.
And then they mentioned Allen, who's a little bit older than May.
But I can see the case for Allen on that.
But they said Mahomes, and I'm like, man, Mahomes is going to be 31 next year.
May's 23.
As a Pats fan, it's crazy, but I don't know if I would do that.
I don't know if I would give up eight years of May to get Mahomes at this point, which would have been the craziest thing to say ever a year ago.
And especially since he fills the void of what you're talking about.
Your guy throws the deep ball well, and Mahomes doesn't anymore.
That's all I'm going to say nice about Drake May.
Thanks.
They were off.
Listen, you turned his career around.
I know.
Well, huge win for the Texans.
I continue to think they're really good, and they have some excellent wins this year.
And you go back to that first part of the season.
So they've beaten Baltimore, San Francisco, Jacksonville.
Casey, Buffalo, and Indy.
Yeah.
A hard schedule this year, right?
Eight and five, when you think like Stroud missed a couple games.
Nick Chubb is in and out.
They have this Woody Marks out of nowhere playing for them.
Neither of their rookie receivers.
They've been okay, but not awesome.
I'd say good job by us for not crossing them off.
I mean, you read that schedule.
If you would have read that schedule, we looked at that schedule.
Like, how the hell are they going to lose?
Minus 1,600 to make the playoffs.
I'll give you a bad job by us.
I texted you and Hench in the house.
We do some future bets during the season sometimes.
And the Colts, I think, were plus 780 to miss the playoffs. with that schedule coming up.
And we batted around and we didn't do anything.
Didn't do it.
And listen, I mean the Danny Dimes thing was terrible today, but you knew one of these teams, after like the eight, nine game mark, was going to do the swan dive.
And it was like, which one's it going to be?
Colts are now eight and five.
There's a crazy Indiana injury thing going on, where you had the Pacers these first three rounds of the NBA playoffs with some of the greatest comebacks ever.
You know, most entertaining games.
It was like, it was like, wow, who sold their soul to win these games basically.
And then poor Halliburton goes down in game seven, Caitlin Clark gets hurt for the fever.
Then you have Jones, who Garrett's calling Indiana Jones and seems like he's.
You know, I'm paced to be the Kurt Warner of 25 years later.
And he's playing with a fracture fibula and then blows out the Achilles on his other knee.
And I think they're done.
I don't, I don't think they can come back from this.
Oh, are you calling Fernando Mendoza?
The IU quarterback is going down the second round of the playoffs.
Maybe, maybe it's just pros.
Oh, I think he should be careful though.
I would wear like what my mom wears.
I would wear the evil eye.
Of course.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, do off the evil forces, high heels, and uh, all right no yeah no, you're right.
Yeah no, just no, i.
Does your mom wear one of those?
No, my father, my father's mother, would wear that.
Yeah, for sure, for sure.
But uh, is your mom insane?
Or is that just my mom?
No, my mom's insane.
But uh yeah, but she has different things going on.
Um yeah, you got.
I mean, i feel bad for daniel jones.
It was like a, it was a valiant effort.
I mean i don't know if it was 30 for 30 material.
I mean, maybe he could be featured in a music box doc, does he?
I don't know if he plays an instrument, but he really just.
We all thought the jags were the ones who were going to fall off right when you said that like, all right, one of these three afc south teams, it's got to be the jags, and now they've won four in a row.
I do think though, could they pick up joe flacco, this colts team, because they're kind of done with this riley leonard guy, and anthony richardson's not not playing, he's not up to speed, isn't he on the bengals?
I thought they, i thought they could.
They either said goodbye to him or they're about to say goodbye to him.
I thought I saw.
But, you know, Burrow's healthy.
So they're plus 270 to make the playoffs.
I don't know.
I just feel awful.
I mean you would think they would go to Anthony Richardson, but he hurt his eye in that freak injury before a game.
Got hit by a pass.
So he's out.
And then I don't know when Sauce Gardner comes back.
Wow, really just really fell apart for them.
I thought this was a weird stat.
The Colts have lost 11 straight road games to Jacksonville dating back to 2015.
Yeah, we talked about that in the pregame show.
Andrew Locke was the last one.
How is that possible?
I know.
Because they had Urban Meyer that year.
I don't remember them winning any games.
So somehow the Colts still lost that year?
I don't know if you saw this on FanDuel.
The Jaguars are now minus 450 to host the Shakey's game on Saturday.
Oh, is that what it is?
Yeah, there's a heavy amount of action.
When times went down.
If there's... I mean, if it's Jaguars, they could host Houston, right?
Couldn't that be a 2-6?
My guess is it's Jaguars against either the Bills or the Patriots.
Because if the Bills beat the Patriots next week, they still have a chance to win the AFCs.
But I would say...
The five seed is coming from the AFC East would be my guess.
See, I think the Jags could be a two seed.
They're going to end up with – they have the Jets at Denver, at Indy, and Tennessee.
They're going to have 11 or 12 wins.
Your team will be the one seed.
Right?
They play Denver.
So if they win that, they're, I think, the two seed.
Wow, are you right here?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, because they're ahead of – oh, you're right.
Because, yeah, they're going to be ahead of the AFC North.
Denver's got some tough games left.
Jacksonville's on a roll.
So it'll be a 3-6.
So it'll be like... I mean, Jacksonville Chargers, just put it in the shakies now.
Start making the posters.
That's a lifetime achievement.
Yeah, there's no question.
There's no NFC matchup that's going to battle that one.
Yeah, you're right.
I forgot that the AFC North is going to be the four seed.
So that'll be either Pittsburgh or Baltimore hosting...
Buffalo or New England.
Odds are it'll be Pittsburgh hosting Buffalo, a game that I feel like we've seen every year now for nine years.
Yeah, I know.
We can't get away from that one.
That turned into a real disgusting division.
I don't know when you want to talk about that, but goodness.
Tell me if you agree with this.
Trevor Lawrence after the game today.
We all feel like we're a really good team and probably don't get the credit we deserve, and everybody talks about every other team.
It's not untrue.
Nobody really cares about the Jags, which is fine.
It's kind of just how it is.
And we'll use it as a chip on our shoulder and keep playing.
You know what happened when I read that, Sal?
What'd you do?
That nobody believes in us.
Police got activated.
Yeah.
They all hopped in a car and started cruising the neighborhood.
They were like, whoa, Trevor Lawrence is just throwing it out there.
Could the Jags be a nobody believes in us team?
Nine and four, nobody's talking about us.
I'm just, we're a nobody.
It's in December.
We're a nobody believes in us land.
I'm on radar now.
He said nobody cares about us.
Is that the same as nobody believes in us?
Because I agree that nobody cares about them.
Nobody really cares about the Jags, which is fine.
We don't get the credit we deserve.
Everybody talks about every other team.
That's all nobody believes in us talk.
Okay.
All right.
Yeah.
I'm starting to believe.
I don't think I count myself.
I don't believe in you either, even though I bet on you today, the Jaguars.
I bet on them in August.
They're my team to win the AFC South.
And with each win, I become less confident in them.
I don't know. but they do get off to leads.
Now they kind of feel like they stomp out some of these teams and their defense is very good.
Like they won their last four, three of them.
They allowed a total of one touchdown, three of the three of the four wins there.
So I, I still think they're going to have 12 wins.
I don't think.
Uh, I'm not saying uh, I'm betting them to win the super bowl at whatever.
What odds would they be like that?
I don't care what I'm not going to do that.
No, they're 19 to one.
Keep, keep going on that.
Cause.
One thing that happened today was uh, I thought Thomas was, you felt his presence a little bit in that game today, which he's been, I don't know, for the last six, seven weeks.
He's been either not playing because he was hurt or he was a mess.
And he was on fantasy waiver wires.
Like it was that bad.
But if they can get him going a little bit with the running game they have and some of the other stuff.
And then and I had a couple of red zone plays today, where there was one specifically where Lawrence was about to get sacked
He's running down the middle toward the end zone.
There's a guy behind him going for it.
And it just, like, had all the makings of the strip sack.
But he didn't fumble it.
Right.
I was like, oh, Trevor Lawrence.
Getting better at this stuff.
Yeah, it's weird.
He's beating, well, you know, like I said, that's a big game against Denver.
I'll believe in you there, Trevor Lawrence.
You beat Denver.
Not that they're a world beater, as we saw today.
But you do that, and all of a sudden, you're a decent, decent division winner.
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So the biggest things that happened today, Chief season's seemingly over.
Mm-hmm.
I'm going to go with this one next.
Do you want me to list all the things I thought were the biggest things to happen today, or do you want me to go one at a time?
Sure, go ahead.
Want me to go for drama, just one at a time?
We can only really respond to one at a time, right?
So whatever you want to do.
That's a great point.
Lamars?
You all right?
We're live, you know.
What's going on here?
I know.
Has he been replaced?
Is this alien Lamar?
Who is this?
Is he way more hurt than Is this, like when Derrick Rose came back after his ACL injury and it was like that looks like Derrick Rose, but it's not Derrick Rose.
Who is that?
I don't understand this.
He's not scary anymore.
When he takes off, you don't... He's not...
You don't feel like he's this incredible magician.
He just seems like the worst case version of playoff game Lamar, but it's every week now.
Right.
He has what?
No touchdown passes.
And how many weeks?
I know, I know he was like averaging seven fantasy points the last three weeks before today.
I don't know what this team's identity is.
And I'll throw the Steelers in there too, because I have no idea what they're going to do week to week.
I can't handle them.
But the Ravens like outran them by what?
180 yards today.
That's usually a winning formula.
10 yards or something.
Russia at home.
That's usually good enough.
And they got screwed on that touchdown day.
Like I'll, Whatever they played poorly, but that likely touchdown, I don't understand what, what anyone's looking at there.
Like you have to, what do you have to do?
You have to secure the ball.
You have to take two steps, then take 11 more steps, then high, high step across and then celebrate with a cheerleader.
Finish the catch by actually finishing the catch and then finishing it again.
Why is he always involved in this?
I know you're right.
He is.
It's everything's down by the goal line with him.
Maybe, maybe take him out there.
And also we were watching it today and they were showing the replays.
It's like, why did you drop this?
It was like the guy came in late and hit it.
He just caught it, took two steps, and just was like, ah!
Yeah, yeah, he freaked out.
Yeah, I don't know.
But, I mean, they should be able to overcome that, Aaron Rodgers.
I'll tell you what.
I'm looking at something.
They could be done.
They're 6-7.
Could they be 6-11?
At Cincy, your team, at Green Bay, at Pittsburgh.
I mean, they're still showing a 165 for the division.
They could be 6-11.
You get 8-1 odds on 6-11 for them.
It might be.
I think they're, I think they're done.
Um, and I kind of felt like they were done even before this week.
But the Steelers were so bad the last couple of weeks.
I looked it up.
So the Steelers are seven and six, which is 13 games.
Yeah.
But I added, I've lost money on 15 Steelers games this year.
There's only 13, two extra games.
I don't, I couldn't find them in the standings.
Every week I'm wrong on them.
It's just week after week, get it wrong.
They are the ultimate Costanza zigzag team.
And I, the thing that was weird today was, Rogers was good.
He, I thought he, like he, the last couple of weeks, he was awful.
Like he couldn't have been worse.
And today I was like, Hey, he's made some plays.
He created time.
He, I don't know.
He took some hits.
Uh, he, he did the double down check, check down or whatever the fuck that's called.
Right.
Yeah.
But did you agree?
Like he was pretty good.
Yes.
He extended drives.
He did all the things you're supposed to do as a quarterback.
You know, maybe playing with that wrist messed up, that left wrist um, last week was tougher than this week.
You wouldn't think so, but going to baltimore would be a tall task.
But yeah, they're the class of that division.
We just keep hoping that cincinnati could win so that they could compete for the division.
But it's just, it's over, it's over, like it's.
It's these two crummy teams that are gonna lead the way at 110 pacific time today.
Now i've been texted.
I'd rather get a rectal exam every sunday than watch the ravens.
She's a ravens fan.
That's pretty rough.
I don't know.
Put that on the box, the VHS for the season.
They still make those 2025 Ravens season thing.
The Steelers had 13 first downs and 34 yards rushing, and they won.
I don't know.
How many of these games have they won like that?
We're like, how did they win?
What just happened?
What did I watch?
If likely catches it, I don't think the Steelers can go 50 yards to get the field goal.
Do you?
Probably not.
No, not the way that game was going.
But I feel like both these teams deserve 6-7, 7-6 at this point.
So what are Ravens to make the playoffs?
They are, well, their division in playoffs is essentially the same, plus 168.
Because they're not getting a wild card.
I was thinking in quarterbacks and Lamar is better than the guys that I'm about to mention are but quarterbacks that just weren't as good anymore.
And it was, and we kept waiting for it to come back and it just didn't.
But, uh, Culpepper did this.
Right.
Randall Cunningham did this.
Michael Vick did this when he came back after the suspension and he was really good.
And then all of a sudden he wasn't, um, I'm sure there's others, but it, it wouldn't be like crazy unusual if he just kind of peaked two years ago, and that's where we are with this now.
Or he might just have four injuries and they're not being honest with us about any of them.
Right.
You know, I was looking at his numbers against the Chiefs, against the Steelers in January.
They're all bad, right?
Lamar's record.
And it's like we had our top four in our heads for probably about three or four years now.
It's been Lamar.
It's been Allen.
It's been Mahomes.
It's been Burrow.
I didn't expect to.
I'm not kicking two of them out of there. but we talk about it, right?
Like we're, we're, we're discussing Lamar has to Lamar is out of there now.
I mean whether he can play himself in next year.
But there's no scenario where he's in there anymore.
Right.
Your boy took his spot.
Yeah.
Is there anybody else?
Jordan, Jordan loves kind of like doing this now.
Right.
Hey guys, let me in.
Like I thought love was great today.
Yeah, he was excellent.
I don't know why he does a fadeaway pass when he doesn't seem to need to do that.
It's almost like a basketball thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But he was very, very good.
Let's talk about that game.
Bears-Packers.
Only three games again.
Why are they doing this to us?
Oh, three games in the late window?
Three late games and the over-under of one and a half of the three games.
Sucking is usually the over.
Right.
So today too, the games sucked, which was great for me because I got to be an NBA hole and watch the Boston Celtics beat the Toronto Raptors.
The three-seeded East.
One of the most inexplicable runs in the history of the franchise.
Anyway.
Well, it was like Tuesday.
You were like, they're going to get pounded by the Knicks.
I was like, yes, you're right.
Let's bet the Knicks.
And then, no, it was the other way.
Yeah, it was the other way.
Well, the OJ and Anobi didn't play, though.
That was great.
I thought Bears-Packers.
I thought it felt like a playoff game.
Yeah.
The Bears lost, and they didn't cover by a half point.
But I thought that game was a good game for them.
It was a moral victory.
They belonged in the game.
It came down to a couple plays.
They were right there.
And in the playoffs, I think that team could hang around and do some stuff.
And you know even beyond that I'm proud of them because you know this is a rivalry that's been going on for like 300, 350 years.
Even though no one can name like two games that they remember in the last quarter century.
Yeah.
Yes, but they stepped up.
They heard it was a rivalry.
I know they were like 1-12 against Green Bay the last 13.
They were down, what, 14-3 at one point?
And that could have been like, all right, everyone's calling them fraudulent.
Now they're going to go away.
They fought back.
I think they only had like 73 yards in the first half of offense.
They couldn't be stopped in the second half.
I can't believe they didn't win this game.
And I know you hate that play where he rolled left, their last play where he threw an interception, Caleb.
But you know what?
He really showed me something.
No, he was very good.
He was very good.
Today I'm on Caleb Williams side and they lost and they're not going to the division.
I thought they really fucked the game up near the end.
So they're basically slow playing it and they were clearly going to try to score and go for the two-point and not have the Packers get the ball back.
I couldn't believe the announcers were even wondering if they were going to go for the two-point.
They were 100% going for the two-point.
You know why they were going for the two?
Because Green Bay let the clock go down.
If there's a minute 40 left, if they're calling their timeouts the Packers, now Green Bay, now the Bears have to think about going for two.
But they went too slow, though.
Right.
I was saying this as it was happening because I think they ran for it.
There's like a minute 15 left and it was headed to be.
It was like third down and short and they let 38 seconds run off before they ran their next play.
But the guy got stuffed.
So now you have all your timeouts left, but now it's fourth down.
But now even if I get it, I'm not even inside the 10 yard line.
So now I've lost some of my run pass flexibility because it's under 30 seconds.
I just thought it was mismanaged by, uh, By the Bears.
Don't get that cute.
Play with a little urgency.
There's two minutes left in the game and you're down seven.
Don't fuck around.
Well, there's a report.
Ben Johnson wasn't even on the field.
He was in the locker room.
He had started his great job guy speech.
Oh, he was oiling up?
Yeah, he was already gone.
He took his shirt off.
So they were coachless towards the end.
He was playing his entrance music.
He was getting ready.
I guess rolling left and throwing the pass that was intercepted.
They had done that against the Eagles last week and scored on it.
So they do like it.
But I I'm with you.
This was a good bears loss.
I know they dropped to the seventh seed.
I don't think they're in danger of losing that playoff spot.
Do you, I'm trying to look at their numbers here.
Now the bears are good.
They're minus.
It took me a while to kind of admit that, but I also thought they made some jumps.
But they can run the ball.
They had some good drives today where it felt like the game was going to get away from him.
And it just didn't Caleb.
He does a lot of good stuff.
He does a lot of stuff that make it uh, he's.
You know, he's raw, he's all over the map, but he's got so much talent.
There's he'll make a couple of plays a game that are some of the best plays of the entire day.
You know, these really, really crazy athletic plays are hitting guys with precision.
Um, I certainly feel better about him than I did like three months ago.
Don't you?
Definitely.
I wasn't even positive if you could win a playoff game with him three months ago.
But there's enough there, I think.
I mean, this is going to sound stupid.
I'm more impressed with this game than I was him beating Philly on Black Friday.
Yeah, because the Packers are legit good.
I mean...
The X factor of this game.
I have to mention this because all the Packer fans, including a couple in my life, were going nuts about it.
And we saw it too.
Parsons got held the entire game.
And especially in the fourth quarter, he was just getting mauled.
And I don't know whether they just decided to call the whole game like that, but it was pretty crazy.
And you could just see it on the TV.
He was like a cannon coming out on these plays.
They were so fast today.
I thought this was interesting.
So Christian Watson's back.
Yeah.
And he's ready to swing your fantasy league playoffs.
I don't know if you saw this, that catch and run score.
He reached 21.6 miles an hour.
Is that right?
Yeah.
When I was watching live, I thought it was like 21.2.
Okay.
Yeah, it's 21.6.
I'm going to get you a new calibrator for Christmas, a new MPH calibrator because yeah, you seem to be off on some of these.
That's almost 22 miles an hour, Sal.
I think Brady said that Caleb Williams this year had three runs over 20 miles an hour.
Imagine Madden talking about this nonsense.
Yeah.
Madden was like, get this shit out of there.
Uh, Brady's, it was really cold there.
Brady was wearing some sort of leather jacket vest.
It looked like a combo Alaska parka, but also with a leather part.
And it was so cold.
I think he just decided to smile like a crazy person.
Cause I think his face froze.
He was just like, Oh, it's great.
What a game.
Oh, he is growing on me.
I'll say that.
I don't know if he had some good moments.
I don't know if he's one of the greats, but yeah, he's, he's grown on me.
It's a, it was enjoyable watching him.
He's having fun watching too.
So yeah.
Or maybe he's.
I think he's figured out how to let the game breathe and had a pop in a couple of times with like Oh, this was one of my favorite plays.
Here's what they did.
They like he.
He's able to weave, like some of his own things that happened, into the game now in an organic way, not an inorganic way.
But uh Packers, I feel like we change our mind every week on this, but they seem like they're the most complete team.
And especially if they can at least figure out a two seed situation and get the first two games in Lambeau.
I think they're in pretty good shape.
9-3-1.
What are the Rams?
10-3?
With the Seahawks game left.
With the Seahawks, right.
And Green Bay's at Denver, at Chicago, Baltimore, at Minnesota.
That should be three wins.
That feels like 3-1 at least, right?
That should be.
Yeah.
So probably two seed for them, which puts them against a seventh seed.
Who's going to be who? uh, maybe an NFC West team or the bears.
It could be, um, well, the bears.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The seven bears right now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, that's true.
I mean, yeah, there's still a fight for this, uh, seven seat in the NFC.
I don't think.
If Carolina wins the NFC South, is that just an automatic Automatic Shakey's game or no?
You can't even get it out of your mouth.
Look at you.
You're choking on it.
Yeah.
I just had a hiccup that I almost died.
Yeah.
Still hiccuping donuts from last night at 2.30 in the morning.
Carolina-Seattle would be a Shakey's game, you think?
Something like that.
Oh, my God, yeah.
Really?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, Jacksonville can't fight that. we are going to lose so much money on that.
It's all going to be about Mike McDonald, how he never loses on the road.
We're going to hate Carolina by then, and they're going to win by 27-6 or something.
It all depends on which week it is when they do the Carolina zigzag.
Right, that's true.
If it's coming off them sucking, you can't I can't believe how Tampa blew this division.
I honestly can't.
I mean, I know you, I bet them.
And now these teams are both seven and six.
I mean, and I lost just a ton on that Bucks parlay.
Did you stay away from the Bucks money line parlay?
Oh, I think they've been terrible.
I looked it up.
They've won one game since game three of the world series, the 18 inning game.
That game happened like a year ago.
Right.
Yeah.
It was a long time ago, but they were playing good teams.
Like this is, this is an automatic.
Just check this off.
Well, remember, we were talking MVP for Baker early.
Right.
He's been bad.
Yeah.
He misses a lot of throws and does a lot of dumb shit and looks like the Baker who is in Carolina.
I think he's hurt, so I'm not going to blame him.
I think he's been playing hurt for the last five, six weeks, but the decision making is bad.
His arm strength doesn't seem the same.
He's missing dudes.
I think he's just been bad.
It was rainy and he's not 100, but it's also rainy for Tyler Schuch.
Go shuck yourself.
Pretty good, and he was decent and he figured it out and he ran for first downs when he needed to.
I really feel like Baker let me down, like Ruiz.
Early in the year when we loved Baker, had Baker as the 16th best quarterback and he came on with me and Tate and I said don't ever come on the show again, that's just nuts, get out of here, Ruiz.
That's it.
Ruiz, do your own thing.
But from week 7 forward, which is probably what you're talking about with the baseball world series, he's 36th of 37 in both EPA and CPOE, which i think it feels that way.
Watching it.
Yeah, oh man, they are gonna blow this division and they're clueless on fourth and one, like bowls, like they don't have an answer.
They just can't convert fourth and one.
Seahawks falcons, speaking of the nfc, south atlanta is now four and nine.
Raheem has dropped to 33 and 56 for the career um.
But i want to mention seattle quickly because they took care of business.
They beat the hell out of kirk cousins right, um.
Seattle has Indianapolis home next week.
Yeah.
We've, I guess, with Riley Leonard.
But if you're ever going to want to play Indianapolis, it's next week.
And then the week after the Rams at home.
So it's all lined up for them.
Like they could potentially even be a one seat if they really wanted to go for it here.
They last two games are on the road, but, um, their defense is spectacular.
I think nine total points.
Uh, eight turnovers, like you're right, i know it's brosmer and cousins the last couple weeks, but they don't really let down on the road.
Uh, when jsn is back, like i think he's going to be the career leader in walking yards into the end zone, like he's so far open, he starts his trot it's like at the six yard line and just walks in.
So who is the actual leader?
That i would say either moss or rice, Moss or Rice.
It feels like Moss had a lot of those.
Yeah, yeah.
Andre Rison used to have a bunch.
Moss would have those TDs where nobody else was in the TV.
He had to have led the league in that.
Right, right, right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
He's got a ways to go, but he's pretty good.
Broncos, Raiders.
Wow.
You know, Broncos did whatever, but just an incredible cover at the end of that game.
Wow.
Raiders down 10, five seconds left.
Line up for the field goal.
Get it.
They cover.
And it might have been the backdoor of the year.
Well, I mean, can he pick it to lock it?
Brandon Jones for Denver knocks it out of lock its head.
So they stopped the clock for delay a game outcomes.
Daniel Carson to kick a spread covering walk off field goal.
I mean, God bless.
I had the plus seven and a half.
I feel like everybody else at Denver.
God bless Pete Carroll.
Just extend him for 15 years.
Let him coach into the nineties.
I love that.
And Pete Carroll was full Biden face the entire game.
Now he's just, he's got the body.
Where am I?
Yeah.
Hunter Biden.
Yeah.
Rams Cardinals.
I just wrote that.
And why do we ever pick the Raiders or the Cardinals to make the playoffs?
I picked the Raiders to make the playoffs.
You picked the Cardinals.
Maybe when we do the futures, they should just be off limits for a playoff pick.
You just can't pick them.
No matter how tasty it looks.
Four o'clock window.
They are just destined to lose by 30 in that four o'clock window like most weeks.
And that was dumb.
They should start flexing games to four o'clock just to kind of help out the multi-view.
Oh, interesting.
Yeah.
Well, we have a full slate of weeks coming up.
There are no more buys.
So we get like four or five 4 p.m. games.
But this should have been the only bet we made.
The Rams raging after that loss.
Cardinals dying to lose by multiple touchdowns.
What would we do there?
Gannon and the first coach fired kind of, kind of their little smoke down dolphins jets.
So dolphins are six and seven, which is the same record as the chiefs.
I was trying to think when they lost that game in a Cleveland, the dolphins.
And if I said to you, then I will bet you, in week 14 the dolphins and chiefs will both be six and seven.
What was that?
25 to one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Something like that.
And here's the funny thing.
They basically eliminated Tua from the offense.
He had week 10, 173 yards.
Week 11, 171.
Week 13, 157.
Today, he was 127.
Throwing three touchdowns in four weeks.
When you watch it, it's like you kind of forget he's on the team half the time.
They're just trying to run the ball.
A-Chan gets hurt today.
They bring him right.
They're just pound, pound, pound.
I think this probably is the last game they're going to win this year.
It better be.
Their over-under was 7.5%.
I mean, I don't care about that.
We have a nice little tidy parlay for them, for teams to not make the playoffs.
And they are, they're still in the hunt.
They're still in that fricking graphic.
They had 239 yards rushing.
They beat Brady cook today, but they need to go.
What we may want to hedge there with 55 to one.
I am not hedging the dolphins.
They can fuck off.
Titans Cleveland.
Did we cross them off?
I can't remember if we did.
Okay.
Yeah.
Titans Cleveland.
Shader is having kind of the perfect season, where there's enough hope that it's exciting, but they're also losing every game.
It's like, you can't ask for much more Stefanski.
Is this one of the great tank jobs of all time?
Or is he just awful coaching?
Cause now it's gotta be one or the other.
Uh, how about this?
It's just like the browns have since been so incompetent for so long.
I can't even tell what a tank is or what like why.
I mean that two-point conversion is ridiculous.
For sanders to not be on the field, but yeah, they don't even know what the play is.
Well, he was on the field for the last one, we didn't get it.
Yeah right, he's your quarterback.
Fuck face, he's 360 yards.
I do feel like Shador's status increased by him by losing to the Titans somehow.
Well, this is like, I mean, it's a great talk radio topic tomorrow.
He's doing just well enough that everybody can be Stefanski sabotaging him, and we can do that whole thing.
We never waited.
I think we do this every year when the team's down 14 and they score.
And then the nerds have decided it's really smart to go for two.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I don't know how I feel about that one way or the other, but the one that was really stupid to me was the one.
What was it?
Thanksgiving or black Friday.
One of those games when they get like that one, right.
When the team was at the Eagles the Eagles on Friday when uh, And everyone argued about that for three days.
I thought that was the dumbest argument I've ever seen.
So you were saying, no, you say kick the extra point there.
I think that was to go for two to see if you're going to be down by eight or nine, right?
No, it was to go for two to try to see if you can get it to seven.
Right.
Because at some point you're going to have to get it to seven.
At some point you have to go for the two.
My thing is, why do I have to go for two now?
If I get a stop and I score another touchdown and their defense has been on the field for the whole fourth quarter and I have even more momentum, don't I have a better chance at that point to get the two versus, like right now?
Because if I don't get it, the game's over.
And then the way that people explain it is like well then, you know exactly how many points you need.
It's like, it doesn't matter.
I lost the game.
I want to keep the game alive for as long as I can.
This is one of those ones where I don't see the other side of the argument.
You can throw all the math you want.
I would rather try to get TD extra point.
Stop, get that defense right back on the field, ram it down their throats again and then go for the two-point after they've just given up 200 yards and 20 plays.
Go for it then.
I was always in that camp.
The defense is going to be more tired then than it is six game minutes from then.
It's the Falcons-Patriots Super Bowl corollary.
The more the Falcons were on the field, they just died.
And then It was easier to do everything.
But you know what's happening?
I think now, not even just nerds, but people I respect more and more are now saying no no, you got to go for two.
You know, like when you see a movie and you're like, oh, that wasn't that good.
But then people are like, no, no, no, go watch it again.
Now I feel, I can't explain it.
It's like fantasy with Eddington.
Exactly.
Fantasy with Eddington was great.
That's it.
Was it?
Eddington is going for two.
That's what it is.
Yeah, Eddington's going for two, the whole movie.
Right.
No, you don't understand.
You got to go.
Eddington went for two.
Oh, okay.
And they'll laugh at you.
Cool.
Titans-Cleveland.
So Cleveland is going to be in the running for the best pick.
Number one pick.
Somewhere in there.
But there's really no number one pick.
Nobody even knows.
McShay's is going to be talking about this for the next six months.
The last one, Bills-Bengals, which I was saving for the end here. which was an incredible game.
Allen is still 14-1 for MVP, which I don't understand, because if they beat the Pats next week there's a real chance they could kind of flip things around.
And Allen was just superhuman today.
I mean, this was like, yeah.
It's hard not to think he's the best player in the league.
As great as Drake May has been, I think the MVP case is there for May.
I get it.
Even though Stafford took the lead a little bit today.
But Allen is just, there's nobody like this dude.
Not too many guys who are scrambling and you're like oh, he'll just get six here for the first down.
He gets 46 in the snow.
It's like a locomotive.
Yeah, it really was.
That was a great game.
That was so much fun, that game.
I loved it.
Yeah.
It was so surprising that Burrow fucked up.
I know.
He had two picks.
One wasn't his fault, but the first one was like a Max Brosmer pick.
Right, right, right.
It was awful.
And it was at a huge part of the game, right?
And it felt like...
I don't know.
I thought they were going to go down and score.
But then James Cook fumbling twice was in a huge part of the game, right?
So you can't be happy for that guy.
He does so much, but you can't be thrilled with him for more than 20 minutes at a time.
Yeah, it's kind of a bummer for Cincy to be out of it, out of it.
If you had a choice, if you could have Bengals just from a viewing perspective Bengals, Cowboys in the Super Bowl, or whatever the Super Bowl is going to be what would you pick?
Just for viewing.
Why can't that be the like Pro Bowl?
Yeah.
Instead, it's just like the two best teams that didn't make the vote about the fans playing for a hundred million dollars paid for by Amazon.
It could be in the morning to the Super Bowl.
It just could be the early game.
That'd be good.
Poor Burrow.
Yeah.
I don't know what to make of this season.
We're not going to have Burrow in the playoffs.
We're not going to have Lamar.
Right.
We're not going to have Mahomes.
We're not going to have Andy Reid.
We're not going to have John Harbaugh, who might get fired.
Yeah.
It's just weird.
It's one of the weirdest seasons we've had in a while.
We're taking one more break for... Nick's and Drake May, and we're going to have... Who else?
Jaden Danos' career is already somehow over after two years.
Bryce freaking Young.
Yeah.
Good job.
Bryce Young's in.
Guess the lines.
You've won a couple in a row.
Yeah.
It's eight to six now.
Week 15.
Your fan base has been fired up.
I know.
I know.
I was with Dave Jacoby this weekend, and it's all he could talk about.
He loves it.
He's like, do you think Sal can pull this off?
He's asking me.
The person who's in control of my own picks.
Right.
What'd you tell him?
You told him yes, right?
I said I thought he could.
Okay, good.
Don't trash talk me now.
Thursday night.
16 games the rest of the way.
Here we go.
This is our last normal slate of the year.
You getting sad yet that football's almost over?
Oh, after Thanksgiving, I'm a mess.
And as my fantasy teams go away, this is right in it.
And my regular team.
Oh, can we talk about that really quick?
Damn it.
I thought I could sneak it by you.
Yeah, sure.
I know.
You shouldn't have.
I know.
My double deuce team, a lot of injuries this year.
Just so much heart.
Much like Trevor Lawrence, people thought, people not talking about us enough.
Right.
But this is in our knockout league that our friend Brad has gotten kicked out of five times now.
Yeah, five times.
Five out of 15 years, something.
So it was looking semi-bleak for me today.
I'm going against Mahomes and Kelsey.
And I have Vidal tomorrow night and then Nico Collins today.
And I'm down like eight points.
And Mahomes puts up 7.4 points.
And Kelsey puts up a 1.3.
They combine for less than nine points.
Nico Collins beats them by five points.
And it looks like I make the playoffs, unless Vidal just comes in fumbles and then pulls a hamstring.
You could just bench him.
He'll be fine.
How do I bench him?
Take a zero.
I'm not telling you.
Figure it out.
Can I do that?
Yes, you can.
Yeah.
You can.
I mean, everyone will hate you if that's what ends up happening.
Oh, I can bench him for Ramond Derry-Stevenson.
Yeah, put in someone that doesn't play.
Oh, that's really smart.
What happens if they recalibrate the scores and then they figure out a day later?
That's tough.
That's tough.
That's a good risk.
You know what?
I want to keep him in.
I want to roll up the score on Coherst.
Send a message if I see him for the playoffs.
But it was amazing rooting against Mahomes and Kelsey and they're having the worst game of their entire career.
I was like, this is great.
All right, guest lines.
Thursday night.
What a stinker.
Our first really bad one in a while.
Can I skip this one?
Can what?
Can I, can we not send out?
Can we send somebody else to this?
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Well, what is it?
Have Collinsworth calm, but like, you don't, you don't need to go to Tampa.
He loves it.
It's got to be somebody else.
It's not going to freak out too much.
It'd be 60.
No, no.
I love the gentlemen clubs there.
It's a great scene.
Uh, I hit this one exact, so good luck off the bat.
Bucks-Falcons.
I might skip this.
This will be one where I'll tell Howard and Eduardo right now we don't have to wait until after the Thursday night game to finish the podcast.
We'll finish it before this game.
I thought you skipped picking it.
I was like, that's interesting.
You're just giving me one.
Bucks minus six was my guess.
It's five and a half.
That's what I had.
Vegas zone.
Good guess.
I want to bet this.
I can't bet this.
They suck.
They suck so bad, Tampa Bay.
This is a bad game.
Yeah, they blew it with this.
And they can't flex it either.
Well, this isn't a bad game.
Sunday marquee game.
What an honor to have my team in the marquee game.
Patriots-Bills in New England.
Good job.
Wow.
A lot of stuff going on here.
Rabel's record out of a bye.
Do you know this?
35-0.
What?
He's had that many?
Yeah, I looked it up.
35-0.
No, it is not.
Something like that.
He hasn't had 35 buys?
Was he coaching in the 80s?
What are you talking about?
He's had a lot of wins in a row.
I forget what the number is.
He looks great for his age.
Wow.
Yeah.
I have this hardcore, it's in New England, hardcore tic-tac. hardcore.
Pat's minus one and a half.
Oh, good.
I'm glad you picked that way.
It's the other tic-tac.
It's plus one and a half.
I said plus two.
I said the Bills favor by two.
Bills are favored.
Yeah.
Yes, sir.
They need it more.
They didn't know about the 35 and 0 mark for Vrabel.
Oh, that is a... You know what?
I know we already had the nobody believes in us place in Jacksonville, but we're going to have to send some people over to New England.
Really?
Okay.
I'm really surprised by that.
Take your pats and a teaser plus seven and a half.
Bang.
There you go.
I mean, this is massive, massive, massive home game for, for the crowd.
Like everyone's gonna be excited all week coming to buy.
Like they'll have, I feel like they're saving stuff for this game.
I thought they asked second half of that Monday night game.
I thought they rope-a-doped the rest of that game.
They didn't want to show anything in the second half.
What was this line when Buffalo was home?
Was that week seven or something?
What week was that?
Oh, it was high.
It was like seven and a half, something like that.
Seven, seven and a half, eight.
All right, so they're not.
Wow, they adjusted a little bit, but not too much.
All right, you're up two-nothing on me already.
Four watchables.
Ravens-Bengals had to put this on here.
It's in Cincinnati.
Mm-hmm.
I have the Ravens favored, even though they've looked like crap.
Ravens minus two and a half.
Oh, you get it exactly.
I said one and a half.
Why should anyone like the Ravens in this situation?
Honestly.
What are they better at at this point?
Maybe their defense slightly?
What's the most fun Derrick Henry team next season?
Oh, where he goes, huh?
Chiefs?
No, he wants to go to a winner, right?
Denver?
Someone like Denver?
Does he want a chance to win a title?
Oh, my God.
That was a drive-by shooting.
Oh, come on.
It's fine.
Nick Wright was 50-50 to go to work tomorrow.
Now he's doubtful.
Enjoyed a day off.
It was like a bullet in Nick Wright's neck.
Unbelievable.
Hey, how about the Texans?
Texans.
Derek Henry on the Texans.
Yeah, that's good.
Has he been on the Texans?
He'll hit this point where it's like, was he on that team already?
All right.
Chiefs home for the Chargers.
Technically, Chiefs season not over.
I have the Chiefs.
Go ahead.
Chiefs minus three.
You're going to get it.
I said two and a half.
It is four and a half.
It was five and a half before the game.
Four and a half.
That's dumb.
I mean, if they win this now, I guess a short week for the Chargers.
I don't know what they're thinking here.
They just don't score enough.
Packers at Denver.
This isn't, I mean, would you have had this as the marquee game or Bill's Pats?
The only reason I had Bill's Pats was that there's more at stake in that game.
Packers Broncos could be the fucking Super Bowl.
Yeah, but I like points at this point of the year.
Try to hit this exact, because I did.
Packers-Denvers.
So it's funny.
I had one team favored in this game by one and a half, and then I flipped it to the other team.
The more I stared at it, and I decided it would be Packers minus one and a half.
You had the right team favored.
Two and a half.
That's what I had.
You got that?
Yep.
Got it exactly.
Yeah, this is...
This is the gambler saying, we don't really believe in you yet, Bo Nix.
You're looking good at some of these crappier teams, but not sure we believe in you against a good defense.
And just gambling psychology.
You're like, oh boy, Green Bay looked pretty good.
They're back.
No problems there.
Denver screwed us with that Raiders thing.
How did they not beat them by three touchdowns?
I'm taking Green Bay and then Denver shows up.
If this gets to three, I think the Broncos are a live pick for me.
I'm with you.
Yeah.
Two and a half.
I just feel like we never had two and a half until like the last five years.
No, I know.
Until AI.
I feel like it's AI's fault.
Really?
AI?
Yeah, AI figured it out.
Like, no, all these lines that were three should be two and a half.
We'd make more money.
Now it's just two and a half.
I'm going to ask ChatGBT why the lines are all two and a half.
And if they hesitate, I'll know you're right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's after we're done with the pot.
That's a good idea.
Rams.
Home for the Lions.
I might be off on this.
That's a good one.
I think I went too low.
This is a great game, though.
I did Rams minus four.
That's what I said.
Five and a half.
Yeah, I knew I should have gone higher.
That's tough.
Lions are running out of guys.
I mean, branches out now?
Jesus.
Yeah, that's rough on the defense.
They get the rest advantage, though, here.
Ten days.
I don't know.
They ran it up on Dallas, but we were due to play a sloppy game.
And that's just kind of what that was.
That's all I'll say.
How do you feel about George Pickens?
Great, dude.
It's going to be a lot of fun.
Did you think like, do you think that's true?
Like he cost himself like 10 to $15 million on like one or two plays where he gave up.
I watched that whole game and did something in my intro for the podcast after.
I didn't really notice the picking stuff as much.
I thought it was like two plays.
That was it.
I mean, it's in my feed all day long.
So that's what it was.
It really was just two plays, but but I think it's more, more troubling when he goes at it with like Richard Sherman and stuff.
I don't think, uh, I don't know.
It's also really tough to pay two receivers top dollar and be good, right?
We're seeing with the Bengals now.
Exciting.
I would recommend against it.
You don't think it's good?
Yeah.
I don't think it's a good idea.
So on Fandle, the offensive player of the year, JSN is now minus 370.
Wow.
Gibbs is plus 600.
Taylor is plus 850.
And then McCaffrey, who has a chance to go 1,000,000.
He had a bye.
It's 25 to one.
Yeah, he's down to 25 to one.
I'll just say this.
Taylor was the best player I was watching all season, non-quarterback for a while.
And I just, I agree with what Sheila and Solak were saying on the podcast the other day.
Like Gibbs, eye test wise, it just feels like he's the best at his job over any receiver running back tight end.
But I think he, I really do think I agreed with what those guys said.
I think he gets penalized because of the team he's on.
Cause they have so many weapons that it's like, Oh, but he's on Detroit.
It's like, I don't know, man.
I wonder, like from a game planning standpoint, if you pulled the 32 defensive coordinators and you were like, who is the scariest guy?
Yeah.
I feel like Gibbs would win.
Right.
Yeah.
You have to prepare for him differently.
And I guess you have, you're having like extra meetings about Gibbs.
Now we got to talk about Gibbs coming out of the backfields.
Now this inside run with, like, you're doing like an extra three hours on Gibbs stuff, I think.
Yeah, I mean, look, the eye test is great, but stats count too.
And he's up there against Barry Sanders for like a 24-year-old.
Like, he's ridiculous.
And, you know, he's hit speeds of up to 62 miles an hour sometimes.
I don't know if you saw that.
That seemed really fast.
Yeah, yeah.
Jason's been great.
I see him being the favorite, but a four-to-one favorite seemed crazy to me.
Yeah. but it feels like that should be a little closer.
Okay.
The fairly watchables.
We only have two Panthers at the saints.
I think all games will play off implications, but this will also be a fun game because saints already beat the Panthers.
I think shuck is like from the saints.
I'm not going into the draft.
Think I need a quarterback.
Like I think he's been good.
I'm for a rookie.
By the way, we had four non first round rookies playing today at one point.
Do you know that at quarterback today for rookies, None of them picked in the first round.
We're all playing today.
Think about how weird that is.
Playing quarterback.
Yeah, that is weird.
Including him.
And now you're going to have the top five teams.
Arguably, three or four don't need a quarterback right.
What are you doing with Tennessee?
I'm still not sure.
They're trading down, but who's trading up?
Yeah.
This is going to be a weird draft.
This is going to be a weird one.
I have the Panthers favored by two and a half at New Orleans.
You get it.
I went higher.
I bought into the hysteria.
I said four and a half.
It is exactly two and a half.
Great.
Wait, what's the score here?
Tough game.
That might be a stay away.
Four to four.
Oh, I hate that division again.
We were so right to neglect it.
This is, I think, the hardest line of the day.
Seahawks home for the Colts.
Mm-hmm.
And the Colts need it.
Yeah.
Riley Leonard against an awesome defense.
I thought maybe double digits was the answer, but I went low.
I think I went too low.
Seahawks minus eight and a half.
They're going to get it.
I said eight.
Damn it.
It's ten and a half.
Oh.
Ten and a half.
Yeah.
That was a bad job today.
That's a tough place to win.
Riley Leonard.
He's going to have to make some plays.
So if you have the Seahawks fantasy defense, good times are ahead in the first round of the playoffs.
That's a good one.
San Francisco is a good one against Tennessee, as we'll see in a second.
I have some bad news.
The Poopfecta has six games in it.
This is what happens when there are no buys or anything.
They have to play the whole slate.
I guess, you know what?
Let's go five because maybe this goes in as a fairly watchable.
Is Bears Browns a fairly watchable or a Poopfecta?
Yeah, it's fairly watchable.
Yeah, I think the way the Shador thing, everyone's going to talk about it.
We do our ringer pregame show.
We do the pre-production meeting.
We try to stack the games kind of like what you're doing.
Talk about the best ones first.
We always move the Browns up because there's a Shador prop.
There's a Miles Garrett prop.
There's fun stuff going on with them.
Stefanski tanking or just having a head injury.
Yeah.
I have the Bears at home favored by eight over the Browns.
Um...
You get that, too.
I said nine.
Why isn't this nine?
It's seven and a half.
Hmm.
Shit.
Six, four.
You're up.
Poop fact of five games.
Giants home for Washington.
So Daniel's got hurt.
We don't know.
We mentioned that all the Washington fans in my life who I took money from did with my Pats versus Washington.
Just were Chang like a speed bag.
Giants.
Giants at Washington, or Giants home against Washington, there's going to be no Jaden Daniels because they decided to play him.
And all the Washington fans in my life did not want Jaden Daniels to play anymore this season because they're out of the playoffs.
He's already injured.
What's the point of this?
We could get a better draft pick.
And yet he played and got hurt again.
Yeah.
And it's unfortunate.
But I I played devil's advocate with that one house and I ran into my buddy, Nathan Hubbard's Washington fan.
What are you going to do?
You're just not going to play these guys ever.
Like there's a quarter of the season left.
It's like it's easy to say from your television, your living room.
But people buy tickets to these games.
Why do they have to miss?
I love your new your new role as the voice of the fan.
I know.
But why?
For next year?
What's next year going to be?
He's a skinny, fragile guy that has already been hurt a bunch of times and you could maybe hurt him for next season.
Then he's not your guy.
He's not going to make it if that's going to be how you view it.
That's it.
Sorry.
I feel bad.
He got hurt, but people are buying tickets for these games.
Somebody's not going to make it on that Washington team, but I don't think it's going to be.
I think it'll be either the head coach, or Kingsbury would be my guess.
Yeah.
Eagles.
Wait, you didn't guess.
You didn't guess.
Oh, I didn't.
Oh, giants minus two and a half.
It is two and a half.
I said one and a half.
All right.
I got some work to do here.
All right.
The giants were okay on Monday night.
I still feel like they're like when you think about two win teams them versus the Raiders they're like way better than the Raiders.
I can't even remember Monday night.
There were a couple of plays, right?
That screwed up.
No, I know.
But what were the two?
They had like two plays that were just really dumb.
Well, we got a punt return.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's dumb.
Yeah.
And was there a missed field goal or something?
Yeah.
There's a missed field goal.
That's hard to handicap those.
But they, they kind of hung with us there for two hours.
Okay.
Eagles Raiders in Philly.
Um, Nobody on the earth is going to bet on this because nobody would trust this Eagles team, but it has to be.
Eagles 12 and a half.
Eagles 13
I'm going to go Eagles 12 and a half.
I might call bullshit on this, how close you are with these monster numbers.
It is 12 and a half.
I said 11 and a half.
Well, who's taking the Raiders?
Well, if it doesn't mean you should get it exactly every single time.
All right.
That's good.
That's the area that big favorites are going to get.
Nobody's taking the Raiders unless you're getting 13 points.
Would you take the Raiders at 11?
I wouldn't.
No, I took them at seven and a half today.
I'm so excited.
They have a new, they have a new system, you know, where they just bring the field goal kicker out.
If it makes sense or not.
Pickett's one of those guys where he'll be like, I could kind of see it.
Yeah.
I'm still holding on to like a penny stock for him.
You know, my favorite Gino, I feel bad for him.
He was in and out of that game.
But when he's in the end zone, they snap it from the two yard line, whatever.
He backs up.
He's in the end zone.
He throws a screen to the guy in the end zone.
I think he likes hitting a receiver in the end zone, even though it's his own end zone.
I'm like, oh, Jesus.
Now this guy has to run six yards to get to the one.
It's nice to feel like I'm seeing a receiver catching in the end zone.
He celebrates.
He puts his arms up.
Tua had a classic today.
I don't know if you saw it.
Because House and I took the Jets.
We couldn't find a fifth team.
So we were like, fuck it.
We took the Jets.
And it was a hint of a possible Jets comeback.
And Tua is in basically zone end zone.
Goes back to pass.
Goes this way.
And then is throwing a screen the other way.
And this Jets guy is just running in for the one yard pick six, which is always the funniest play in football.
But he kind of banged into the guy and he couldn't catch it.
Tua has one of those a game.
Some of the worst passes of the season, and it's him once a game and the guy always drops it somehow.
He's a Madden glitch.
Yeah, he really is sometimes.
You're like, how did you throw that?
Jags home for the Jets.
I have the Jags minus 10.5, probably too high.
No, I had 9.5.
It's 11.5.
Oh, that's definitely too high.
They hate the Jets.
I hate the Jets after today.
I mean, what's it going to be?
Is it going to be this?
Who is this schmo today?
I don't even know what Brady Cook.
It sounds like a quarterback name, but.
Yeah, that sounds like AI or like the Madden generator created a name.
Your new quarterback is Brady Cook.
He's got a 64 rating.
Southeast Louisiana.
So, yeah.
Texans home for the cards.
Is this an old school 2004 Sal and Bill three-team teaser?
I know you don't want to do the Eagles.
I can't.
No, it's illegal to put Trevor Lawrence in a tease.
So with no Trevor Lawrence, no Hurts.
Yeah, we have the Niners coming up.
There's a Niners game coming up.
That could be the last piece.
All right.
I have Texans cards.
Texans minus nine in Houston.
Let's see what this move to.
All right.
Come on.
Where is this?
Houston is home.
Yeah.
Got it.
Eight and a half.
I had eight and a half.
I did get this.
I swear.
Well, that's a good one.
Now, what are they going to?
So they're doing the Kyler Murray.
They're just not bringing them back because it's easier for them to get rid of a lot of his contract.
But if he got hurt, there's some injury thing.
We're doing that thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let him play baseball.
It's fine.
They'll go on.
Is there a team that would talk themselves into Kyler Murray next year?
Could he start for, like, the Jets?
You can't do that to the Jets.
Well, that's going to be your answer for whatever I give here.
No, there's a couple others I was thinking.
You could say it.
They're in this league?
Atlanta?
Oh.
Hmm.
They can't think Pennix is ever playing for them again.
17 knee injuries.
He does.
He would fit in Atlanta on a lot of levels.
I would want him indoors, probably in one of the Souths.
I think his destiny is to be in one of the South divisions.
Yeah, probably right.
It's because just weird shit happens in both of those divisions, so get him in there somewhere.
You're destined for the South, young man.
Take this plane ticket.
Right.
Atlanta I thought would be a good one for him.
Niners-Titans in San Francisco-
And I think I'm too low on this.
I said 10 and a half for this.
I said 11 and a half.
It's 13 and a half.
Oh, my Lord.
I don't think I'm close here.
Wow.
Six, seven, eight, nine.
So we can't put that in a tease.
No.
I'm up by one?
No, you're up by like two.
Nine, two.
You're up by three.
It's nine, six.
Oh, I clinched.
Great.
Yeah.
Take that, Jacoby.
Damn, Jacoby.
So close.
Sunday night.
Cowboys, Vikings.
Your team, still technically sort of alive.
I guess you need the Philadelphia Eagles to lose tomorrow against the Chargers.
Yeah, at least that.
And then you win this.
It makes me sad to watch Washington play like they did today.
And I know it's because the quarterback went out, but they play the Eagles twice.
I need them to show up.
Whatever, it's over.
It's fine.
But meanwhile, I did watch one minute of that Vikings game, but apparently they played great.
Yeah.
People were upset with me.
Like, see, you didn't give J.J.
McCarthy enough credit.
Like, look, I like when quarterbacks play well.
Don't you?
Like, I want to have good quarterbacks in the league.
I just don't want them to come to life when I bet against them.
I want either really good ones or really bad ones.
I thought Brosmer's pick six was my favorite football moment probably of the month.
So Tyler Schuch does nothing for you because he's kind of in the middle.
He's in the middle.
He's not a guaranteed fourth quarter interception.
Just for watching football on a Sunday, yeah, he's in the middle.
Although he's fun from a backdoor cover or getting frisky as a big money line thing.
I want to figure out Ringer 107 next year.
I really feel like we got to work in underdog picks.
Ringer 107 should move a little bit more like our Sunday pregame show.
So there's just certain categories of picks a little bit?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Cause I thought uh, I thought the Texans as an underdog would have been a really fun, like just the underdog money line.
This, the saints against the bucks was like a really obvious money line one.
That would have been a fun one to go after.
Um, Sunday night at Cowboys at home.
I have them in the Vegas zone here at minus five and a half.
That's what I had too.
And it's six and a half.
I mean, but what's the, we're going to be, 8-8-1.
The Eagles are going to end up having like 11 wins, 10 wins.
It's going to be like, what did we go crazy about?
It's going to be a weird vibe for those Eagles playoff games.
Yeah.
What seed is that looking like right now?
Well, they won't top either of the NFC West teams.
They have the Bills.
They have two against Washington, Vegas, and the Chargers tomorrow.
10 or 11, right.
Yeah.
Monday night.
Three.
Yep.
Steelers home for the Dolphins.
And let me tell you something.
If this isn't in the Vegas zone, I don't know anything.
This is the most Vegas zone game matchup of the year.
This is it.
We've reached peak Vegas zone.
Yeah.
I went Steelers minus four and a half.
It's not.
I hit this one exactly.
It's three and a half.
I'm going to recount these.
Six, eight.
You lost.
No, yeah.
It's 10-8.
Maybe it wasn't 10-8.
9-6 in the week.
How is that game not in the Vegas zone?
They have no idea what to do with the Steelers.
I don't blame them.
I feel bad for anyone who has to set these Steelers lines.
My goal for the rest of the year is to get a Steelers game correct.
That's my new goal.
Four weeks left.
I was talking to Anthony DeBundo, my co-host on several shows during the week.
Tony Tokens and he's like the Steelers special.
They just outgrew it.
They just can't do it anymore.
It's They're kind of lost with it.
Lose the first half, win the game.
They didn't even do it today.
Well, you should have.
Once that story came out about they could buy out Tomlin in March, it was like ah, they're definitely winning.
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Why don't you start us off?
Okay, so I'm a lunatic with my children in terms of asking dumb questions and I insist on answers right.
Like I used to do this with my cousin, Jimmy, when I'd go out there, I'd be like 11, he'd be 14.
I wouldn't let him go to sleep before he'd answer the questions.
Like if one of your parents had to die, which would you pick?
And he would like stall for like two hours and then he'd finally- By the way, you used to do that to me when we worked together
Right, exactly.
It's great, right?
Simmons, Simmons.
If you could only save one of your parents, which one would you save?
And you said your father.
Yeah, because your mother's wearing that thing.
I refuse to answer.
Your mother's safe because she's got that.
No, don't say that.
She'll get mad at me.
She'll put a curse on me.
No, you did not say that.
I refuse to answer.
I have it recorded, but it's fine.
Uh, no.
Um, so I, of course I do this with my kids.
What's the point of having kids if you're not going to do this with your kids?
So I'm like yeah, like I asked him, if one of your cousins had to live in a tree the rest of their life, what would it be?
And which of your friends would join a boy band?
What's the weirdest thing you'd weirdest animal you'd put on a slice of pizza cooked kangaroo, by the way is the answer there.
So now harrison, my youngest, is kind of turning the tables on me.
He likes uh, this kind of line of questioning only when he wants to play.
But he asked me and i want you to answer this um, you get 10 million dollars to complete a 20-yard pass to someone in your contacts in your phone and if you lose you get shot in the head, and so then then it's like The question's like all right, who's doing the shooting?
And he's like, well, I would shoot.
I'm like, no, you're not going to shoot me in the head.
And so then that all ends up.
But anyway, you die if it's incomplete.
If it's complete, you get $10 million.
What's your answer here?
What did you answer?
Well, I feel like I narrowed it down to three.
Mikey Meatball's a ringer producer, very good athlete.
I don't think he'd let me down.
Van Lathan, very dependable, athletic.
Creaky knees.
Oh, really?
Yeah, I don't know.
Okay.
Could stumble as you're throwing it.
Uh, I think fan comes comes to here and and and our friend tall John, because I don't think I could overthrow him, you know.
Right.
He's like, he's about, you know, he's seven or eight feet tall.
So those are my three.
Do you have athletes in your, you know, I'm going to pick Craig Coral back.
Oh, good.
Okay.
It's like almost six foot three.
He's in the like late twenties, like maybe 29, 30. still plays sports, does stuff.
I would pick him or Tate.
Tate, good hand-eye, little younger, scratch golfer.
Tate's going to be upset with me for not picking him.
I want that range.
You can't pick even though my son can catch anything.
I don't know if I'd trust him.
Maybe it's too much pressure.
Maybe he'd want me to get shot in the head.
He wants to collect.
Let's go.
Let's see where that money is.
I would go Horlbeck or Tate.
Tate's going to be so upset with me for not picking him.
This is the worst thing you ever did to Tate.
Yeah, I know.
All right, Tate, you're number four on the list.
Damn, that's a pretty good one.
That's good.
So that's what your kid's doing now, coming up with crazy.
Yeah, I like it.
I don't mind it.
It keeps things fresh.
But you know Larry David, don't you?
Isn't he in your contacts?
Wouldn't throw it to Larry?
He's too old.
Yeah, anyone over 50 wouldn't do it.
So we had a little holiday thing yesterday, and we got rid of the dogs.
We brought the two dogs to my mother-in-law's house and they stayed over with my mother-in-law and it was great.
It was like when you're, when you're just getting rid of your kids, when you actually have real kids.
And I was thinking like, this is something we should probably do more often.
Have an empty cause Ben doesn't hang out with us.
We get rid of the dogs.
It's like, we have like an empty house.
It's like, we're, we're going nuts.
And then that got, got me into this existential crisis of it.
Would it just be better if we didn't have dogs?
I love Murph.
He's probably my best friend.
I did this pro cons list in my head because it was so nice to just wake up in the morning and we didn't have to feed the dogs, walk the dogs just lie in bed.
Postmated Starbucks.
I was like, I'm just not doing anything.
This is great.
I'm so glad they're not here.
What did they do to get in the way of you postmating Starbucks?
How do they get in the way?
Well, just having to wake up, go down, feed them, let them out.
Just like the responsibility of all that.
Walk them around.
Do you hit a point in your life?
Because I've always been a dog guy.
Do you hit a point in your life when you get older where it's like, eh?
Maybe this is kind of a pain in the ass.
Really?
See, I thought it was the other way.
I thought, and you told a nice story about your dad.
Like he wants a dog, right?
Like I think when you get older and there's no one in the house, the dog is even more necessary.
This is why I did my pro con.
I played it out in my head.
I did a whole bunch of pro cons.
Yeah.
And I ended up with, it is better to have the dogs.
But I did.
It was the first time in a while where I was like all right, let's actually think about this.
Was it close with the pro con?
It was close. for you to say this.
You know the shitting in the house was a con?
You don't like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, that happened recently after Thanksgiving when Murph dropped a big one in a room.
I mean, Murph accounts for like 38% of your parent corners which are sponsored a lot of times.
So you have to consider that.
Was that on the pro?
That's, Well, are you going to get another dog after your older dog?
Yeah, I think so.
Oh, you are?
So you always have a dog?
I think so.
I think we have to have someone to yell at.
The wife talks in a weird voice.
It's very routine at this point.
My only other parent corner is my son needs to start wearing contact lenses.
His eyesight has been kind of lousy.
Like just lousy enough to get by where he could like see, but now it's kind of like straining is doing this and his eyes like he actually really needs to start wearing.
So he's been wearing glasses when he studies at night and stuff like that.
He just needs to do contacts, but he doesn't like putting his fingers near his eye.
So when I was 13.
You're a big contact guy for a long time.
Well, I was glasses forever because I didn't want to put my fingers in my eyes.
I didn't want to, I was like afraid to put my contacts in.
Yeah.
So I thought for a parent corner, I would tell this story.
I went to hypnotist between eighth and ninth grade and the hypnotist, over the course of three sessions, walked me through putting my finger in my eye and I got over the hump and I started putting my contacts in and I've been wearing contact lenses ever since the fall of 1983.
And now I'm at the point where I could be in an airplane as it's landing and bumping and just like fucking put my contacts in.
Really?
But I couldn't get over the hump.
So the question is should we get a hypnotist for my son who doesn't want to put his fingers in his eye?
Or is this insane?
No.
First of all, oh, so you'd get rid of the dogs and get a hypnotist?
No, no.
Okay.
Would you trade the dogs for a hypnotist?
Why didn't you, wouldn't an ophthalmologist be able to take you through it better than a hypnotist?
You can get some kind of.
No, I didn't want to put my, I was afraid of my finger.
For some reason, I had like a weird thing about my finger going near my eye.
I just didn't like it.
So I have more questions.
What did he do?
He or she do to get you to like, what things did they say?
We did that thing where you go into like the little hypnotist thing and then and then he would walk me through visualization and of putting contacts in my eyes and put the finger there and press it against and blink and make sure.
And I would just kind of go through it.
And it actually worked.
I think hypnosis might be underrated.
No, I think it does work.
Do we do it for a baby doll to get him to stop smoking or is it more fun to just have him smoking?
No, yeah.
No, that's his essence.
He needs to start and he wouldn't go anyway.
He needs it.
I once said I was on such a bad gambling streak.
I went to a hypnotist.
Our cousin Jimmy set us up with this hypnotist he liked to stop gambling.
This was like before I knew you.
But the, when I got to him, it was a Friday and I was going to Vegas that weekend.
And I said, whatever you do, can it kick in Monday?
And he's like, get the fuck out of my office.
What are you talking about?
So I had conditions, but I think it does work for people.
Would Ben do that?
Or we just laugh at you.
So apparently his girlfriend's going to help him with it.
And once you get over the hump of it, you're good.
But there's something about the mental block of doing that.
Yeah.
Well, the fact that you had it and you could relay that to him.
I'm a success story.
I've been wearing them forever.
It's why my eyes look red and everything we do now in 4K and people always think I'm stoned.
It's because I have these giant fucking contacts in my eyes.
Right yeah, and if.
And the other thing with contacts is you can't use like byzine or any of that to make your eyes whiter, because just putting chemicals in there and then and they have like these rewetting drops but they don't really work for me.
It's so complicated.
You never got the lasix right.
No, my eyes say it's.
I'm like a minus 10 and 105, so it's right in that range where you have to get either reading glasses or uh yeah Yeah, there's no saving me.
I really thought as we got older, I really thought they were going to figure out seeing and hearing.
Didn't you think in the 80s, it'd be like, oh, they're going to figure this out.
We'll have no more blind people or deaf people.
We'll have all this stuff.
By 2000, they'll have it all.
They're going to have flying cars.
There's going to be a pill for baldness.
The fat thing, I feel like, for a lot of money, is resolving itself, but there's something for that.
Somehow we can't figure out seeing or hearing.
But we can make videos of a cheetah coming into somebody's room at AI, where they steal somebody's baby and the cheetah leaves and it looks like a real video.
Somehow we've been able to accomplish that.
Need some kind of pill so that Murph doesn't shit all over the house.
Maybe I need to hypnotize Murph.
Maybe that's where this lands.
Can dogs get hypnotized?
It couldn't hurt.
That's Parent Corner.
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What else?
Any other highlights before we go?
That's it.
I don't know.
Everyone's screaming about the college football playoffs.
You don't care, right?
Like this is just, I care about my James Madison guy, Chesney.
They made the playoffs.
Yeah.
Holy cross from Holy cross, James Madison going to UCLA.
That's my guy.
And now he's playing Oregon.
Yeah.
But he won't even play the coach there.
Right.
It's just such a mess.
I thought he was going to finish the season.
He is.
I know he did the other day, but yeah, I don't know.
It's just like, I feel like this thing, this was like the worst week for football.
These conference championships don't really mean anything.
I know they got to figure that out.
I just, they have to go to, they have to go to 16 teams because it's just unfair.
No matter how you look at it.
I really feel that way.
Like, Miami beat Notre Dame.
So how are you going to put Notre Dame in over them?
Alabama, sure, three losses, but they played in a conference final, which these other teams didn't.
So they get a point in the top two conference finals.
So just move it to 16 games.
But I think Lane Kiffin overall, I just wanted to say this.
I think he's taken a lot of crap for lying to kids.
The people get righteous about lying to kids.
You know how many kids I would lie to for like an extra $40 million?
I would lie to like 500 kids.
Yeah.
They make it like he took them to Bosnia and left them there.
It's like they're going to be fine.
They got scholarships.
They'll get a new coach that kind of cares about them.
Yeah, you lied to kids.
Is that the worst thing you did?
It took 100 million more.
Can I give you quickly a couple basketball things that I just thought was interesting just on a Sunday night.
Yeah, go ahead.
The Celtics now have the fourth best odds to win the Eastern Conference at plus 650.
They're a three seed, and there's real feelings that Jason Tatum could be back in January.
That's fascinating.
Miami is 12-1, but is probably the most likely team to get Giannis, unless you want to say Atlanta, who's 11-1.
And those are the ones.
If you wanted to make a Giannis play with one of those two teams, you could do it.
The other one that's interesting is there's been some Trey Murphy trade buzz recently.
And I think if San Antonio was able, San Antonio makes the most sense for him.
Right.
Cause they have Devin Vassell's contract could send that back and they have all these picks.
Right.
And Trey Murphy's probably worth three first round picks.
Um, and if they got him and they had castle and they had Dylan Harper and they had one but Yama and they have all the other guys they have.
It's a.
They're not going to beat OKC unless somebody got hurt.
But it's just like.
Their odds are 25 to 1.
I think those odds would go down.
Would you go something for the division?
I'm looking at plus 320.
Would they overtake the Rockets?
Potentially.
Yeah.
Then the only other one is Denver would be the wildcard Trey Murphy team.
Everyone will say San Antonio, Detroit.
They'll list all the usual suspects.
But Denver could go, Mac Daddy, trade Cam Johnson, who they just traded for, throw some extra picks in there to New Orleans and get Trey Murphy.
That's the only team that can catch OKC.
OKC is minus 130 to win the West.
And I honestly don't understand why that's not two to one.
Denver is plus 450.
And Denver is the only team that I think could chase them down.
So 25 to one, is that what you said for that?
Yeah.
Um, and then the other one is okay.
See that 74 plus wins is still dropping and now it's plus four 90.
Yeah.
I honestly would be shocked if they lost 10 games.
I don't see how it happens.
Really?
Yeah.
I really don't like right now they're 23 and one.
It's like every time they lose, it feels like an event.
They're so good.
They're so deep.
I know there'll be some schedule stuff coming on later.
They've won 15 straight.
Their net stuff's, I just don't understand how they would lose 10 games.
So that plus 490 is a really crazy number, I think.
What's their baseline?
70 and 12?
70 plus is minus 114.
75.
Right now to win 70, they're minus 114 just to win 70.
So it's four more wins.
And 75 is plus 750.
All right, I'll do that.
But here's the thing about the 74.
And this is why I think it's a great bet.
If they're a little close to it, right?
If they're like 64 and eight or something like that, like they're not going to do the thing, where like yeah, we don't care about that.
Like at some point you go for the record, they go 10 and oh, and they're deep.
Right.
And I think you would want to try to finish and try to get it.
And you're at your, some nights you're going against tanking teams.
I just think, I can't believe plus 490.
I think that should be lower.
I think that should be like two to one.
I'm going to do that.
I'll lose on that.
So that one, that jumped out to me.
Yeah.
The Celtics over under, this is another number I couldn't believe.
49 and a half right now.
So before the year, they were 42 and a half.
So it's jumped seven wins, basically based on them looking good for two weeks.
Um, and then there was a dallas one too.
I know i told.
By the way, i told house this was going to happen here.
You were down on the celtics coming in.
Oh my god, i went to that washington game.
I was like, oh my, if one guy gets hurt, this team's gonna win 20 games.
They're gonna make a little run right around the nba cup thing, like they may not even be involved in the nba cup.
You're gonna be back on them.
And now you say now they're gonna win 50 games plus.
Huh, two things happen yeah um, I talked about it a little bit.
We got hypnotists.
Jalen's just been night after night, has been toe-to-toe with whoever the best guy on the other team is.
He really did go up a level.
And Cade has been good all year, but this Jordan Walsh thing is out of control.
This is a guy that couldn't get on the court the first two years.
And even the first two weeks, it was kind of surprising when he was even out there in crunch time.
And now he's turned into this destructive wing like Reeves talked about him after the Friday game.
He was like that guy's really good, he's like really hard to score on.
So they, they built this team with these wings that try really hard.
They have shooting.
They figured out how to bring in Simons and you know they beat Toronto in Toronto day.
That was Toronto's been good this year.
They have they're putting together good wins over and over again.
So anyway, 49 and a half seem high to me, but that's you know.
Just it says to how good they've been playing.
Are you sad?
LeBron's 10 points streak is over.
I thought it was the best way to end.
I will say though, I never really cared at all about the 10 points.
Yeah.
I thought the more interesting one to me was the Shea streak.
Do you see that one?
Like Shea is almost, I think he's getting close to a hundred straight 20 point games.
Yeah.
And the record's one 26.
Like that's one, that's like a baseball hit streak.
That's great.
That's great.
But think about all the shit that Well but.
But don't you think like pick any great player of all time?
Don't you think any of them, if they were like, all right, we got to get 10 every night.
No, but it really means you, most of them, you didn't twist your ankle.
Right.
It's more like an injury like thing.
Right.
Yeah.
And that's been one of the great things about That makes LeBron so different than everybody else is the durability.
The guy never fucking gets hurt when he's hurt.
Even now at age 40, it seems shocking.
But I'm more impressed by the 20 plus.
All right.
What about Bronny?
Could he put together like a two point streak?
Like a dozen or something?
Lakers had a good win today.
Yeah.
They won in Philly and LeBron had his best game of the year.
So we'll see.
I'm interested to see what Rich, we launched a Rich and Max podcast tomorrow.
Game over.
They're taping in the afternoon.
And I'm interested to see what Rich says about the Lakers.
Cause I think he's gonna not hold back.
He says he's not talking basketball.
You didn't see that thing he came out with tonight.
What?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just college football.
It's him and McShay.
Oh, and we had the worst UFC ever this week.
Yeah.
By the way, you know, so that started my losing streak for the week.
Of course I had Merab in a Moneyline parlay and he went out there and he went like two for 25 in takedowns.
And then what did he say?
What disease did he have today, did he say?
He's like, I'm sorry, I was fighting.
Oh, now I have to find it.
It was like a serious thing.
He claimed he had a disease?
The norovirus.
He's like, I've been fighting the norovirus all week.
Like, Lamar Jackson doesn't practice and it's unannounced.
And it's like, oh my God, this is like, come on, Dana White.
Let's see a roster of everybody who has the norovirus.
And I'll be sure not to bet so many thousand on them, whatever that number is.
Well, I was thinking with the dislocated elbow 26 seconds in the previous match.
Do they need a guy in the weight class who's just like The bullpen closer if there's some sort of disaster and it has to be in the first two minutes of the match.
If the match is over.
It's like you hear the glass break, the stone, cold music and all of a sudden this next guy comes running in and we just keep going.
I like that.
Probably not legal.
No, but too many broken bones are over.
You're right.
No 10-point streaks in the UFC.
All right, what do you got to plug this week?
That's it, man.
We're doing this ringer gambling show, live shows on YouTube and the FanDuel Sports Network.
I'm on Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday.
It's great on the FanDuel to actually just pop on one of the cable channels and it's there.
Yeah, it's all over the place.
Let's see a promo for us on a Timberwolves game.
It's fun.
Good times.
And we occasionally give out winners.
All right.
As always, good job by you.
Good job by you, buddy.
Thanks to Eduardo and Gahal as well.
Don't forget rich and max.
Their podcast we'll be putting up, probably tomorrow night, so get ready for that.
It's called game over.
Hope you subscribed to that one.
Hope you checked out the jeff buckley documentary we did.
Uh, we have, i think, whiz kids coming this week, but uh, and that one's really good too.
But uh, music box series on hbo and uh and sal.
Next time i see you.
We'll have an answer on pats versus bills.
Oh right yeah, make that.
I could be in a really good mood.
I might be in not a great.
Come on flex that thing.
Yeah, see you next week.
I don't know.
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