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Two people claim to know everything about something, but only one knows anything.
President Roosevelt wore an anti-gravity belt.
Dinosaurs had two brains.
Lucky kids live on Mars and go to school in flying cars.
Or at least they will one day.
Believe me, I'm a historian.
An astronaut or driver DeLorean.
Would I lie?
It's hard to say.
The Big Fifth!
Can you spot the light?
The Big Fit!
Some pigs can fly.
The Big Fit!
But if you ask me why, can you trust the answer?
The Big Fit!
From Gene, Eva, New York, this, well, it's The Big Fit.
And now, here's your host, Deborah Goldstein.
Welcome to The Big Fib, the game show where kids choose between the stylishly comfortable practicality of truth and the ill-fitting, unseemly capriciousness of lies.
I'm your host, Debra Goldstein, and in the studio today is our sound effects robot Lisa, whose name stands for Live In-Studio Audience.
Did you just make something in the microwave, Lisa?
Indeed.
I have set the microwave to a preset amount of time to bake a listener question until it's warm and fluffy.
Oh, hi.
I had no idea you baked listener questions.
You have to.
Here it is.
Fresh out of the microwave.
Hi, I'm Evie and I'm eight and I want to know why.
Do you use human styles?
Why don't you use robot children?
Hey, yeah, why don't we use robot children?
Debra, what have you got against robot children?
I don't have anything against robot children.
I do think robot children would probably have an advantage, given their ability to look up all the answers while we're playing.
So it probably wouldn't be much of a game, would it?
Uh, okay, well, what if we invited robot children to be our liars?
Oh, well, I don't think we should be programming robot children to lie, do you?
You're really not making it easy for us to include robot children on our show.
Okay, well, what if we invited robot children to come help you with the sound effects?
Oh, sure, and what if we invited robot children to come host the show, hmm?
What do you think of that?
Huh, Debra?
Okay, okay.
There's no need to get testy.
Maybe we can talk about how we can include robot children in the show offline.
I don't think we're going to be able to figure it out right now.
But thank you so much for the question, Evie.
We'll do our best to include them.
Yeah.
Way to look out for the robot children, Evie.
Oh, my gosh.
Evie.
She's a robot child.
No, I don't think so.
She probably is.
No, but I- We got one on the show, Debra.
Clever.
You're very clever.
I'll ask her how she wants to participate.
But for now, since we don't have any robot children on the show, we only have a human child contestant on that show.
We're going to kick it off by telling everyone how our game works.
Ooh, or maybe a robot child could do that.
No, no, no, no.
I've got it covered.
Okay, we'll find something else for that robot child to do.
Maybe get me coffee or something like that.
Okay, anyway, every week we bring on two grown-ups.
One is an expert, the other is a liar, and it's the job of a human child to help us figure out who is who.
Because no one and I'm talking no one except for like a robot child can spot a liar better than a kid.
What are we lying about today?
Deborah D. Goldstein.
We are lying about pants, an article of clothing that covers each leg separately below the waist.
And we're going to learn all about pants along with our contestant today.
Who might that be, Lisa?
Our human child contestant is a 10-year-old who is an Irish dancer, Kaya Toft.
Welcome, Kaya.
How are you?
I'm good.
How are you?
I'm good.
Thank you for asking.
Tell us about Irish dancing.
What is that like?
It's really hard when you first learn, but then it gets easier when you start doing it more often.
Yeah, it's a lot of footwork.
Isn't that right?
Yeah.
Is it difficult to learn all the steps?
Some steps are easier than the others.
Do they have special names?
Left foot and right foot.
Yeah, it's that.
Sorry, go on.
Are there other names of steps?
Yeah.
So there's like a slip jig, which is like a soft shoe dance.
And then there's like a trouble jig, which is a hard shoe dance.
Wow.
So you have to memorize not only the steps, but what they're called.
And do you perform in front of an audience or compete at all?
I mostly perform, but sometimes I do compete.
Very exciting.
And this is something that you've been doing for a long time?
Yes, I've been doing it for about three years.
Oh, you must be so tired.
She must be so good at it, too, I bet.
Yeah.
Very cool.
I would like to learn some more cool facts about you Kaya, but we are going to do it Big Phib style, playing our game.
Two Truths and a Lie.
You, Kaya, are going to share three things about yourself.
However, two of those things will be true.
One will be a lie.
And we have to figure out which is which.
So in no particular order, Kaya, what are your two truths and one lie?
My favorite animal is a possum.
My favorite color is orange.
And I have a cat named Rowan.
Okay, so the possum is a super cool marsupial, so I kind of hope that that's true.
But what do you think, Lisa?
Very interesting.
I see the game she's playing.
Very complex.
I like it.
A good competitor.
Well, unfortunately for you, you're going against me, the master of this game.
So, we have two animals in here, right?
A possum and a cat.
And we have a color, orange.
Now, often cats are orange.
Some of them.
Not all of them.
But some of them tend to be orange.
Now, Rowan is a name.
I've heard that name.
And I think it's usually from the UK.
And we learned that she does Irish dancing.
And that's in that same area.
And also, Rowan is what you do if you're on a boat.
You go rowan.
So therefore, you would think if you were in a boat, you're probably not going to see a possum, because those are land animals.
So that's the lie.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
All right.
Let's see if that twisty turny logic gets us to where we want to be.
Kaya, which one of those is actually a lie?
I have a cat named Rowan.
I don't.
I think again.
You don't have a cat or it's not named Rowan?
I don't have a cat.
I actually have a dog named Rowan.
Oh, cute.
A dog named Rowan.
I like that very much, which means that you do.
What's the matter, Lisa?
I got it wrong.
That's okay.
It happens.
Okay, I feel better.
Good.
I'm so glad.
So that means you do like the color orange.
Understandable.
And that your favorite animal is a possum.
That is true?
Yep.
What do you like about possums?
Well, I just think they're really cute.
And I saw a video of this one lady giving a possum a manicure.
So...
You know what?
That's not fair.
I never saw that video, so I didn't know she would like them.
Right.
It would have changed your answer, would it?
Yeah.
I see.
Well, I think we're all warmed up.
I know that Kaya can tell a good fib, so perhaps she can identify a good fib, too.
We'll have to see as we study the facts and fiction of pants.
Are you a fan of pants, Kaya?
Do you wear pants often?
Yeah, I'm actually wearing some right now.
Excellent.
Hey, let's give it up for Pants.
Very good.
I think you've got a leg up on the whole situation.
All right.
So let's welcome our Pants experts.
Hey, Lisa.
Yeah.
Can we get some welcome music for our Pants experts?
Yeah.
Yeah, we can.
Oh, oh, I know what you desire.
It's Pants.
But that's not what this is.
Come on in.
Thank you.
Beautiful.
I feel a lot of nostalgia.
Okay.
Our first expert is Grace English.
Grace, please introduce yourself to Kaya.
Hi, Kaya.
My name is Grace English, but you can call me Gigi.
And I am a men's clothing designer and a personal tailor.
Thank you very much.
Our next expert is Vincent DePaul.
Vincent, please introduce yourself to Kaya.
Hey there, Kaya.
It's Vincent DePaul.
I'm an international model and a former fit model for Tommy Hilfiger Pants.
Thank you very much.
Drop it like it's hot.
Tell us about those zippy beats, Lisa.
Those beats are straight from my zip files of Hot Seat Time.
That's fantastic.
It is Hot Seat Time, and that is when we put our experts on the hot seat while they answer Kaya's questions.
Lisa, whom should we put on the hot seat first?
Grace English, because that gives me an excuse to say, Hello, I'm English.
What's going on?
You know?
Okay, fair enough.
Kaya, what is your first question for Gigi?
Can you describe a normal day at your job?
Well, I work from home, so it's quite fabulous.
I usually wake up and do some yoga.
I make myself a cup of coffee and then I will work on whatever special orders I have at my sewing machine for the day.
Right now, it's pretty busy, but I try to make all my deliveries on Fridays.
And most of my work right now is focusing on sustainable clothing and upcycling.
So I'm sourcing from people who make buttons out of things like milk protein or excess wine or reused orange juice, which are very funny materials to say out loud, but Those are what I'm working with right now.
And I sit at my sewing machine for a very long time.
It must like that.
It must be like, hey, thanks, Gigi, for keeping me company.
That's true.
I wish it could talk.
Its name is Theodore, but it doesn't talk.
It's a singer.
Right.
It probably sings.
Nice one.
Very good.
Excellent.
This question is for Gigi.
In history, why did people first start wearing pants?
Well, I know it was derived from the ancient togas of Greece, but when there were battles, the men had to ride on horseback, of course, and then the togas split down the middle, because you can't sit on a horse with a toga on.
You could try, but I suppose that would be very uncomfortable.
The horse wouldn't like it.
No, definitely not.
Okay.
This question is for Vincent.
What advice would you give me if I were to do your job for a day?
If you wanted to do my job for the day, it would be very easy for you.
You just have to be very natural.
When clients select models for print campaigns or for runway shows, they select them because they have just a really nice personality.
What I would recommend is that you look at different fashion magazines and online magazines to see what the trends are, to see what, let's say, they're wearing at the Gap store or the Banana Republic store.
And then I would hire a photographer for you to be photographed wearing some of those Gap Kids clothes, because then clients can see you wearing the clothes and then they would know wow, she would be perfect to be one of our models.
So always in the fashion world, it's always about the trends that are happening and how you would fit into the trend.
And then I also would recommend you listen to music and walk with music, so you could walk on the runway.
Those are the things I would recommend you do if you wanted to be a model.
Debra, I think I might want to be a model.
Okay, well, get some pants on and we'll take some pictures.
Okay.
Ow!
Oh, they're so tight, Debra.
Well, you need a better size.
No, I'm going back to togas.
Oh, well.
All right, Kaya.
This question is for both of you.
What is the worst thing to stain pants with and how do you fix it?
Oh, yes.
Everyone wants to know that.
Well, it depends on the fabric of the pant.
So when you have a pair of pants, if it's a cotton material it absorbs easily into the cotton fiber.
And so you want to use as much water as possible to kind of flush out that stain.
And afterwards it'll be great if you use something like a spray and wash or one of those devices or OxiClean to kind of extract whatever that stain is.
But you want to be careful so you don't take away the pigment.
Denim pants as well as other pants.
They have pigment in them to give it its color blue or red pants so you always have to be careful not to extract the pigment of the pant.
So i would use mild detergent on it.
Also which you could use if you're in a restaurant and by chance you drop ketchup on your pants.
I would use seltzer water to kind of allow that stain to have water on it so it doesn't absorb into your pants that you're wearing at the store or at a restaurant or anywhere that you may have had a little spill.
I agree with everything Vincent said.
I would just also add I like a strong vinegar that will get out a lot of tricky stains.
And I would say the trickiest stain is probably from blood.
Yeah.
That sounds like you're misusing your pants.
Right.
Well, very good.
Those were excellent questions.
I learned quite a bit.
It's time for the shorts on fire round, where our experts have to answer as many questions as they can before time runs out.
Lisa will set a timer for the first expert and then Kaya will ask questions until Lisa's timer sounds.
Then Lisa resets the timer for our next expert to do the same.
Experts get ready.
These questions are going to fly.
Kaia, let's start with Gigi.
You can ask Gigi your shorts on fire questions now.
What's another term for pants zipper that refers to the flap that covers the zipper?
The fly.
Who designed capri pants in 1948 after her favorite vacation spot?
Someone French.
Who was the designer who invented suspenders to hold up high-waisted pants in the 1820s?
Truman Weiss.
What's the name of the young adult novel about best friends in high school who share a pair of jeans?
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.
What's the pleated item of clothing worn at a formal event that covers the seams and buttons of pants?
The Cummerband.
Which pants were designed with very large pockets for soldiers to hold maps and food?
Fatigues.
What kind of pants does SpongeBob wear?
Square.
Which editor of the magazine The Lily, printed instructions in her magazine for making pants for women in 1851.
I'm not sure.
Which type of pleats are folded towards the center of pants?
Those would be central pleats.
And that is time.
That's all the time.
Very good.
Lisa, my friend, would you kindly reset the timer?
Kindly?
Yes, kindly.
Oh, this is fun.
Was that kind?
Yeah, I did it.
Thank you so much.
All right, Kaya, you can now ask Vincent your shorts on fire questions now.
Which company first added belt loops to pants?
Levi's in 1922.
What do you call loose-fitting pants that hit below the knees and look like skirts?
They're gauchos.
Where can you find the inseam on pants?
Inside the leg, from the hip to the ankle.
Name a material used for making track pants.
Cotton, polyester, terrycloth, or velour.
Which royal prince introduced trouser cups to prevent pants from hitting the dirt?
Edward Prince of Wales.
What is the thick cotton material woven with raised parallel lines on the outside used for making jackets and pants?
Corduroy.
Factor fib.
Shorts are pants.
Hmm.
Are shorts pants?
I think it is a fact that shorts are pants because they're a derivative of pants cutting off the legs.
Which famous rapper is famous for wearing parachute pants in the 1980s?
MC Hammer?
And that is time.
That's all the time.
Whew, Kaya.
Very good job.
Excellent.
It is decision time.
No time for Kaya to slack off here, but she might have to choose by the seat of her pants.
So, Kaya, who is our big pants fibber?
I think the fibber is Vincent's.
Why do you think Vincent is our fibber?
I don't know.
I just have a feeling.
Okay, we're going to go with it.
All right.
Will the actual pants expert please say, I am the pants expert.
Hi there, Kaya.
It's Vincent DePaul.
I'm so sorry.
Don't be sorry.
We're going to get to the bottom of all these things, but in the meantime, I will tell you that Vincent DePaul is a two-time consecutive Emmy winner.
He has modeled for editorials for Diesel Girbeau and Gianni Versace and he's been on the cover of Men's Health and the Fit Model for Tommy Hilfiger Pants.
He stars in Beverly Hills Christmas 1 and 2 also.
All right.
Well, we have a lot to uncover here, don't we?
Let's do some fact-checking.
Vincent, how did Gigi try to stir up trouble?
One thing was that when you use recyclable orange juice and things like that really recyclable, I mean it's great.
We can use recyclable fabric, but usually buttons are made from different plastic materials.
So yeah, some of those things.
I see.
Gigi, it's time to cuff it up.
Tell us about all of your fibs.
Well, some of my fibs were the togas didn't split in Greece.
They actually made pants for them to get on the horses.
So I thought it would be kind of funny, though, if a toga split down the middle.
Blood is not the worst thing to stain.
Ketchup does really.
Oh.
And it's called a cummerbund, not a cummerband.
Oh, tricky one.
That was the pleated item of clothing worn at formal events that apparently you're supposed to wear pleats open up in case you drop any crumbs.
Oh, that's fabulous.
Interesting.
Yeah, I know.
Then you have those crumbs for the way home and you're like, oh, I
Oh, look at all this bread I have in my pants.
So smart.
I love it.
Okay, so we also had a number of fibs to clear up here.
The person who designed the Capri pants in 1948, after her favorite vacation spot was Sonia de Lennard.
Was she French?
I'm sure I'm not saying that right.
Correct.
Correct.
Gigi said someone French.
That counts.
Yes, she was halfway correct.
That's true.
The designer who invented suspenders to hold up high-waisted pants in the 1820s was Albert Thurston, in actuality.
And also the pants designed with very large pockets for soldiers to hold maps and food.
Those were cargo pants.
They were originally designed for the British forces to hold field dressings, maps, and other items.
Let's see.
The editor of the magazine The Lily, who printed instructions in her magazine for making pants for women in 1851, which was very controversial at the time, was Amelia Bloomer, as in bloomers, which were named after her.
And the type of pleats which are folded toward the center of pants are called forward pleats.
Well, so much to learn.
So many interesting facts about pants.
Who knew?
Well, we've reached the end of this leg of the show.
Thanks to Kaya, who was a fantastic contestant overall.
Thank you to our expert and liar, Vincent and Gigi.
And thanks to Lisa, who cinched those sounds.
And, of course, many thanks to our listeners tuning into The Big Fib, where we call out liars for their britches of faith.
And we are very pleats with the truth.
The Big Fib is a production of Gen Z Media.
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Oh, there's a whole hot dog in my comfort box.
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