Hi friends, it's cheryl and welcome to sleep tight relax.
You're safe here in your cozy spot tonight.
Take a moment to snuggle in, maybe pull your blanket up, just right, and let your shoulders drop gently away from your ears.
So we've been on quite a journey with our Relax Rangers, haven't we?
We learned square breathing with Breath, Bear body scanning with Mindful Mouse, Visualization with Dream Deer and Progressive Muscle Relaxation with Calm Cat.
Four really useful tools for helping ourselves feel calm and comfortable.
But learning these tools is just the first step.
The real question is how do we actually use them when we're facing something that makes us nervous or worried or scared?
Tonight we're visiting Breath Bear again, but this time he's not in his garden.
It's early morning and Bear has his first day helping at the forest school.
He's going to teach young animals about gardens and plants. which should be interesting, right?
Except Bear's stomach is full of those worry butterflies.
The what-if thoughts are spinning around in his head.
The good news is, Bear remembers the skills he's learned, but which ones will help?
And how do you use them when you're really, truly nervous about something real?
Let's find out what happens when Bear faces his first day worries.
Remember back in our first episode when Bear learned square breathing for his garden worries?
That was about noticing worry thoughts and using his breath to calm down.
Well, today we're going to see something a little different.
How to use all of our skills when we're facing something that actually makes us nervous.
Not just worried thoughts, but real situations that feel scary and overwhelming.
Here's what I've noticed in all my years working with kids.
Worry loves to show up before new experiences.
First day of school, trying out for a team, going somewhere you've never been, meeting new people.
It's like worry's job is to imagine everything that could go wrong, even though most of those things never actually happen.
When you're really nervous about something real, sometimes one tool isn't quite enough.
It's kind of like if you're building something really complicated, you might need a hammer and a screwdriver and maybe some tape.
Same with managing big worries.
Let's try something quick.
Close your eyes for a moment and think about something coming up that makes you feel a little nervous.
Nothing huge.
Maybe a test or a performance, a presentation, or visiting someone new.
Got something in mind?
Now, where do you feel that nervousness in your body?
Fluttery stomach?
Tight chest?
Shaky hands?
Just notice where it shows up.
That's the first step, noticing.
Then you get to choose which tool might help.
If your thoughts are racing, maybe square breathing.
If your body feels tense, maybe muscle relaxation.
If you need to picture yourself succeeding, maybe visualization.
Or, and this is what Bear's about to discover, maybe you use a couple of them together.
The thing about managing worry is the goal isn't to make it completely disappear.
Sometimes worry hangs around even when we use our tools.
But the tools help us feel like we can handle it. instead of feeling overwhelmed by it.
Let's see how Bear figures this out on his first day at forest school.
Breath Bear wakes up before his alarm even goes off.
The morning sunlight is just starting to peek through his window and for a moment, just one peaceful moment, he feels fine.
Then he remembers.
Today is his first day helping at forest school.
And just like that, the worry thoughts start tumbling through his mind like acorns falling from a tree.
What if he messes up teaching about plants?
What if the young animals don't listen to him?
What if he forgets everything he knows about gardens when he gets nervous?
Bear's stomach feels uncomfortable.
A fluttery kind of feeling, like there are nervous butterflies doing somersaults in there.
His chest feels tight, like someone's wrapped a rope around it and pulled it just a little too snug.
He sits up in bed and tries square breathing, the technique Wise Owl taught him all those weeks ago.
In for four.
Hold for four.
Out for four.
Wait for four.
But halfway through the second breath, another worry thought interrupts.
What if I accidentally teach them something wrong?
What if they ask questions I can't answer?
Bear tries again.
In for four.
What if I'm boring and they all fall asleep?
Hold for four.
What if the head teacher thinks I'm not good enough to help?
This isn't working, Bear mutters, getting out of bed and padding to the kitchen.
Maybe some breakfast will help settle his stomach.
But when he looks at his usual bowl of oatmeal with berries, his stomach feels uncomfortable again.
He's too nervous to eat.
Bear sits at his kitchen table, paws wrapped around a mug of chamomile tea, and stares out the window.
I know I learn tools for worry, he says to himself.
I use them in my garden all the time.
But this feels different.
This feels bigger.
The forest school is only a short walk away.
Gentle Rabbit said she'd come by to walk with him.
Bear glances at the clock.
She'll be here in 15 minutes.
15 minutes to figure out how to feel less like he might throw up from nervousness.
Right on time, there's a gentle knock at Bear's door.
Bear?
It's Rabbit.
You ready to head over?
Bear opens the door and Gentle Rabbit takes one look at his face and her expression shifts from cheerful to concerned.
Oh, Bear, you're feeling it, aren't you?
The first day nerves?
Is it that obvious?
Bear asks, his voice smaller than usual.
Well, you're doing that thing where you're holding your shoulders way up by your ears and your paws are all clenched tight.
Plus, you have that look.
The one I remember having on my first day at forest school three years ago.
You were nervous too?
Bear feels a tiny bit of relief just hearing that.
Are you kidding?
I was terrified.
I almost turned around and went home twice on the walk over.
Rabbit steps inside and gently closes the door behind her.
But being nervous about something new is completely normal.
It doesn't mean you can't do it.
It just means you care about doing it well.
Bear nods, but his stomach is still uncomfortable.
I've been trying to use my square breathing, but the worry thoughts keep interrupting.
I can't even eat breakfast.
Okay, Rabbit says, her voice calm and steady.
We've got some time before we need to leave.
Want to work through this together?
Sometimes it helps to have someone with you while you use your tools.
Really?
You do that?
Of course.
That's what friends are for.
Rabbit settles onto the floor across from Bear.
So tell me.
What exactly are you worried about?
Not just first day jitters.
What specific things are the worry thoughts saying?
Bear takes a breath.
What if I mess up teaching?
What if the young animals don't like me?
What if I forget everything I know when I get nervous?
What if... Okay, okay, Rabbit says gently holding up a paw.
That's a lot of what-ifs all crowding in at once.
No wonder your square breathing isn't keeping up.
You're trying to calm down one worry while three more are piling on.
So what do I do?
Well, Rabbit says thoughtfully, you know four different tools now, right?
Maybe we need to use more than just one.
Let's figure out which ones might help with which worries.
First thing, Rabbit says, let's do a body scan.
Not to fix anything yet, just to notice.
Where are you feeling all this worry in your actual body?
Bear closes his eyes and pays attention the way Mindful Mouse taught him.
My chest feels really tight, my stomach is all fluttery and uncomfortable and my paws keep clenching up without me meaning to.
Good, you're noticing.
Now, let's start with those racing thoughts, all those what-ifs spinning around.
That's where square breathing really helps.
But this time I'm going to count with you, so your mind has something to focus on besides the worries.
Rabbit's voice is steady and calm as she counts.
In for four.
One, two, three, four.
Hold for four.
One, two, three, four.
Out for four.
One, two, three, four.
Wait for four.
One, two, three, four.
They do this three times together.
And Bear notices his thoughts slowing down just a little.
Not gone, but not spinning quite so fast.
Better?
Rabbit asks.
A little.
The thoughts are quieter now.
Okay, good.
Now.
Let's deal with that tight chest and those clenched paws.
That's the physical tension part.
Remember what Calm Cat taught about progressive muscle relaxation?
They are knots, and together they work through tensing and releasing.
Paws first.
Squeeze tight, then let go.
Shoulders up to ears, then drop them down.
Even his face.
Scrunch it all up, then relax completely.
Now, Rabbit says, here's where we add in what Dream Deer taught you.
I want you to close your eyes and picture yourself at forest school.
But not the scary version your worry brain is imagining.
The version where things actually go well.
I don't know if I can.
Just try.
Picture yourself showing a young squirrel how to plant a seed.
She's interested, asking good questions.
You know the answers because you've been gardening for years.
You're smiling.
She's smiling.
It feels good to share what you know.
Bear sits quietly, building this picture in his mind.
And something shifts.
The worry is still there.
He can feel it hovering around the edges.
But now there's also this other feeling.
A small feeling of, maybe I actually can do this.
How does that feel?
Rabbit asks after a minute.
Different, Bear says, opening his eyes.
The worry didn't disappear, but it's not taking up all the space in my head anymore.
There's room for other thoughts now, too.
That's exactly right.
The goal isn't to make the worry vanish completely.
It's to make it manageable.
You just use three different tools together, and look, you can breathe normally now.
Your paws aren't clenched.
You're ready.
Bear looks at the clock.
Time to go.
The walk to forest school feels different than Bear expected.
The worry is still there.
He can feel it fluttering in his stomach, but it's not overwhelming anymore.
When a particularly strong what if thought pops up, he does a quick square breath and keeps walking.
When they arrive, the head teacher, a kind old badger, greets them warmly.
Ah, Breath Bear, we're so glad you're here.
The young ones are very excited to learn about gardens.
Bear's chest tightens again, but he remembers.
Notice.
Breathe.
Choose a tool.
He takes a slow, square breath while the badger is talking.
The first group of students arrives.
Five young animals, all looking up at Bear with eager, curious faces.
A small rabbit, two squirrels, a young fox and a tiny mouse.
Good morning, Bear says, and his voice only shakes a little.
Today we're going to learn about how seeds grow into plants.
He shows them the seedlings he brought from his garden.
The young rabbit asks how long it takes for a carrot to grow.
Bear knows this answer.
He's grown hundreds of carrots.
The words come easier than he expected.
During a short break, Bear does a quick body scan.
His shoulders have relaxed.
His stomach isn't fluttering quite as much.
He's still a bit nervous, but he's also okay.
He's doing this.
By lunchtime.
Bear has successfully taught two groups about planting seeds, watering schedules and which vegetables grow best in shade versus sun.
Another new volunteer arrives, looking absolutely terrified, and Bear finds himself sharing his breathing technique with her.
It doesn't make the nerves go away completely he tells her honestly but it makes them feel manageable.
Like you can do the scary thing, even though you're scared.
She tries it, and Bear sees the same shift in her expression that he felt this morning.
At the end of the school day, Bear and Rabbit walk home together through the forest.
The afternoon sun filters through the trees and Bear feels tired in a good way.
I was worried the whole time, Bear admits.
But I also did it anyway.
Both things were true at once.
That's kind of the secret, isn't it?
Rabbit says.
You don't have to stop being nervous to do brave things.
You just need tools to help you manage the nervous feelings. while you do them.
Bear thinks about his next forest school day.
He'll probably feel worried again, but now he knows he can handle it.
Worry and capability can exist together.
Thank you for helping me this morning, he tells Rabbit.
Anytime.
That's what friends are for.
So Breath Bear discovered something pretty important today that using your tools together can be more helpful than using just one at a time, and that feeling nervous doesn't mean you can't do something brave.
Let's practice this approach together.
But like always, if you're feeling sleepy, Just listen and maybe try this another time.
For those of you who want to practice.
I want you to think about something coming up that makes you feel nervous.
Maybe it's a test at school or trying out for a team or going somewhere new or performing in front of people.
Don't pick the scariest thing you can imagine.
Just something that gives you those worry butterflies in your stomach.
Got something in mind?
Good.
Now, let's work through it the way Rabbit helped Bear.
First, let's notice where you feel the nervousness in your body.
Close your eyes if you want to and do a quick body scan.
Tight chest, fluttery stomach, tense shoulders, shaky hands.
Just notice without trying to fix it yet.
Now let's start with your thoughts.
If you're having lots of what-if worries, like Bear was, let's use square breathing to slow those thoughts down.
In through your nose for four.
Hold gently for four.
Out through your mouth for four.
Wait for four.
Let's do that two more times together.
In for four.
Hold for four.
Out for four.
Wait for four.
One more time.
In for four.
Hold for four.
Out for four.
Wait for four.
Notice if those racing thoughts have slowed down even a little bit.
Now let's deal with any physical tension you're holding.
Find the tightest spot in your body, maybe your shoulders or your hands or your jaw.
Tense it even more.
Hold it and let it go completely.
Feel that release.
And here's where we add visualization, just like Bear did with Rabbit's help.
Picture yourself in that nervous situation, but imagine the version where things go okay.
Not perfect necessarily, just okay.
You're handling it.
Maybe you're even doing well.
What does that look like?
What does it feel like?
Take a moment to sit with that picture in your mind.
Here's what Bear learned today that might help you.
Worry doesn't have to completely disappear for you to do hard things.
You can feel nervous and capable at the same time.
The tools don't make you fearless.
They help you be brave even when you're scared.
And remember, like Bear discovered, you don't have to do this alone.
You can ask someone you trust to help you practice your tools bravely before the scary thing happens.
That's not weakness.
That's being smart about taking care of yourself.
You have everything Bear had this morning.
Square breathing for racing thoughts.
Body scanning to notice where worry lives in your body.
Visualization to imagine yourself succeeding and muscle relaxation for physical tension.
And now you know you can use them together. in whatever combination helps you most.
Pretty useful stuff, don't you think?
As you rest here with Breath Bear after his brave first day, let these gentle truths settle into your heart like seeds finding their place in warm soil.
You learned something really important tonight.
You discovered that feeling worried and being capable aren't opposites.
They can exist together at the same time.
Like Bear, you can feel nervous about something and still do it anyway.
Worry doesn't mean you can't handle hard things.
It just means you care about doing them well.
That's actually a good thing. even though it doesn't always feel good in the moment.
You have tools now, not to make worry disappear completely, but to help you manage it while you do brave things.
Square breathing when your thoughts race.
Body scanning to notice where worry shows up.
Visualization to picture yourself succeeding.
Muscle relaxation when tension takes over.
And you can use them together. in whatever combination helps you most.
Like bear, discovered with rabbit's help, asking for support while using your own tools makes you stronger, not weaker.
Sometimes we need a friend to count our breaths with us or remind us to use the skills we know, or just sit with us while we're feeling scared.
You don't have to be perfect.
You don't have to be fearless.
You just have to try to use your tools.
Tomorrow might bring new situations that make you nervous, and that's okay.
That's part of growing, learning, and doing new things.
But now you know.
Nervous feelings are manageable.
You can feel them and do hard things anyway.
Like Breath Bear walking into forest school with butterflies in his stomach, you can walk into your own challenges, carrying both worry and courage together.
We are going to leave you now with some peaceful sounds from the forest school evening to help you drift off to sleep.
You are calm, relaxed, and peaceful.
Good night.
Sleep tight.
