And now, it's time for Who Smarted?
Hey, Smarty Pants, give me one sec.
Maybe if I pull this one?
No.
What about this one?
No.
Nope, that only made the knot tighter.
Smarty pants.
Have you ever gotten a super gnarly knot in your shoelaces or headphone cord that you simply can't untie?
Ugh, I give up.
It's impossible.
There is nothing impossible to him who will try.
Easy for you to say.
You're not the one who's been trying to untie this crazy knot for over an hour.
Looks like you've got yourself a Gordian knot.
A what?
A Gordian knot.
It's come to mean an extremely difficult problem.
But in this case, it's a literal knot.
Don't feel bad.
This Gordian knot got the best of everyone who tried to untie it.
Well, except for Alexander the Great.
Well, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm not Alexander the Great.
I'm Trusty the narrator.
Nice to meet you, Trusty.
I am Gordo the Great.
Wait, you're also the Great?
Are you and Alexander related?
No.
I see.
Then what makes you so great?
What makes me so great is that I know a great amount of things about Alexander the Great.
Ah, of course.
So what does Alexander the Great have to do with this ridiculously hard Gordian knot that I can't for the life of me untie?
Okay.
You don't know?
I do not.
I got you to say not.
Get it?
Not?
Like the one you're trying to untie?
Mm-hmm.
I am not amused.
So, does Alexander the Great have anything to do with this not...
Or not?
He does.
Legend has it that Gordius, king of Gordium, a city in ancient Turkey, tied an incredibly intricate knot and prophesied that whoever untied it would one day become the ruler of all of Asia.
Ah, now we're getting somewhere.
Then what happened?
Alexander the Great showed up and paid the Gordian Knot a visit.
Gotcha.
Smarty Pants, can you guess what happened next?
Go ahead, shout out your answers.
Uh-huh.
The Smarty Pants and I say he untied it.
Nope.
He didn't untie it?
Oh, no.
This knot was truly impossible to untie.
Oh, then what did he do?
He did this.
Whoa, is that a sword?
Yep.
Whoa, you just cut the knot.
That's not all.
Hey, you also cut the pom-pom off my hat.
Eh, it was silly looking anyway.
But hey, I solved the Gordian Knot, just like Alexander the Great did.
And sure enough, he went on to fulfill the prophecy and become the ruler of Asia.
Interesting.
Smarty Pants, have you ever heard of Alexander the Great?
Who was he?
Where was he from?
And what made him so great?
It's time for a great big whiff of science and history on... Who Smarted?
Who Smarted?
Okay, Smarty Pants, let's begin at the beginning.
Where was Alexander the Great from?
Was it Greece, Macedonia, or Macadamia?
If you said Macadamia, that sounds close.
Ah!
But macadamia is actually a kind of tree that bears the well-known macadamia nut.
But if you said Macedonia, you got it.
To be a little more specific, Alexander was born in 356 BCE in Pella Macedonia, the capital of the ancient Greek kingdom of Macedon.
Wait, so was Alexander Macedonian or Greek?
Both.
In ancient times, Macedonia was a region in modern-day northern Greece.
Today, there's a country north of Greece called North Macedonia.
Ah, got it.
Alexander's father was King Philip II, and his mother was Queen Olympias.
But as Alexander's accomplishes mounted, it was said that he was the son of Zeus, himself ruler of the Greek gods.
Gee whiz!
What do you have to achieve for people to think you're the son of Zeus?
A lot!
For starters, Alexander was a military genius who built an empire that spanned south from modern-day Greece down to Jerusalem and northern Egypt, then east all the way to India.
It was one of the largest empires the ancient world had ever seen.
Okay, that's impressive.
Although his conquests could be bloody and ruthless, he had such a large influence on Greek and Asian culture.
He ushered in a new historical epoch called the Hellenistic Period.
True or false, smarty pants?
The term Hellenistic comes from the word Hellas, which is the name for Greece in the Greek language.
If you said true, that's correct.
Wait, if Hellas is the name for Greece in Greek, why do we call the country Greece and not Hellas?
The simple answer is as complex as the difference between Latin and Greek.
Hellas is the name of Greece in the Greek language, but the English name Greece comes from the Latin Gratia.
So why did the Latin stick and not the Greek?
That, my trusty friend, is a Gordian knot of a question.
One possible reason is the spread of Latin during the Roman Empire and the language's prominence in the Middle Ages.
But I digress, or from the Latin, The greedy?
Never mind.
Let's get back to Alexander the Greek.
I mean, great.
Hey, either work, because he was both.
Right.
So what other accomplishments had people thinking Alexander the Great was the son of Zeus or that he should be nicknamed the Great?
Where to begin?
Oh, I know.
When Alexander was 12 years old, he tamed the wild stallion Bucephalus, the horse who would become Alexander's loyal battle companion.
Then, a year later, when he was only 13, he was tutored by one of the world's most famous philosophers.
Hey, smarty pants, which famous philosopher tutored Alexander?
Was it Plato, Staphylococcus, or Aristotle?
The answer is Aristotle.
Great job if you got that, smarties.
For three years Aristotle taught Alexander everything from literature to medicine, to scientific investigation.
And then, when he was 16, Alexander's father went off to war, leaving Alexander in charge of all of Macedonia.
Seriously?
Seriously.
Wow, I was barely allowed to be home by myself when I was that age.
That's why you're not trusty the great.
Anyway, just two years after that, when Alexander was 18, he led a cavalry regiment.
What?
What's a cavalry regiment?
A large group of soldiers on horseback.
Alexander, of course, rode his trusty steed Bucephalus as he led a cavalry regiment against the sacred band of Thebes.
Thebes?
No, Thebes, a city in the modern-day region of central Greece.
The Sacred Band of Thebes was an elite fighting force rumored to be unbeatable.
Unbeatable?
How do you beat an unbeatable army, smarty pants?
True or false?
Alexander lost in battle to the unbeatable Sacred Band of Thebes.
If you said true, guess again.
Because true is false, and false is correct.
Indeed, Alexander was able to beat the unbeatable and defeated the sacred band of Thebes.
In fact, it was Alexander himself who would become unbeatable.
You know, he never lost a battle his entire life.
His entire life?
How many battles was that?
It's hard to know exactly, but at least seven major battles.
But there were probably more.
After all, it takes a lot of battles to establish such a far-reaching empire.
In 336 BCE, after Alexander's father was assassinated by his bodyguard and Alexander became king...
Hold up.
King Philip II was killed by his bodyguard?
Yes, by Pausanias of Orestes.
Isn't that the opposite of what a bodyguard should do?
Yes.
Why?
Why was King Philip II assassinated?
Historians have speculated at the motive since ancient times, but it remains a mystery to this day.
But whatever the reason, at just 20 years of age Alexander became king of Macedonia and was determined to continue his father's quest for Macedonian world domination.
World domination?
Um, that sounds kind of mean, doesn't it?
Yes.
Maybe that's why he was assassinated.
Maybe.
But hey, if they thought killing the king was going to slow down the world domination, they had no idea what was in store for them once Alexander took over.
Right.
And we'll find out the path Alexander took to build his vast empire and how this unbeatable conqueror eventually met his end.
Right after a quick break and a word from our sponsors.
Who Smarted is brought to you by Squarespace.
Now, you know I'm good about creating new adventures and episodes of Who Smarted, but you don't know that I procrastinate on other stuff, like a website for one of our new projects.
Oops.
When the website builder Squarespace reached out about sponsoring Who Smarted, I decided to test it out.
And now I feel silly for putting off building that website.
Squarespace's Blueprint AI thing literally built me a custom website in minutes.
I just told it a few details about the project and boom, it generated everything.
And everything you need is right there.
I can schedule guest interviews, send email campaigns, even sell merch all from one dashboard.
And when you're ready to launch, you can use code SMARTED to save 10 on your first purchase of a website or domain.
That's squarespace.com slash SMARTED.
Code SMARTED.
This episode is sponsored by IXL.
Look, I know back to school looks a little different when you're a homeschool family, because maybe you're keeping up with your year-round rhythm or maybe you're starting fresh with new plans and goals.
Either way, it is the perfect time to reset, refresh, and find tools that make life easier.
That's where IXL comes in.
IXL is an award-winning online learning platform that covers math, language arts, science and social studies from pre-K through 12th grade.
It adjusts to your child's level, giving them just the right challenge at the right time.
So learning feels motivating, not overwhelming.
We'll be right back.
Over 15 million students use IXL, and more than 75 studies show that it really works.
So make an impact on your child's learning.
Get IXL today.
Who Smarted listeners get an exclusive 20% off when you sign up at ixl.com slash whosmarted.
That's ixl.com slash whosmarted.
And now back to Who Smarted?
Okay, smarty pants, if there were boss-level battles during Alexander's conquest, who do you think was Alexander's first boss?
Or for non-video game players, who was the first significant leader King Alexander defeated?
Was it King Poseidon?
Good King Wenceslas?
Or King Darius III?
If you said King Poseidon, the Greek god of the sea, you must think Alexander really was the son of Zeus.
Even Alexander the Great would have trouble defeating King Poseidon.
The answer is King Darius III.
And who was he?
King Darius III became king of Persia in 336 BCE, the same year Alexander became king of Macedonia.
King Darius III commanded an empire that spanned from modern-day Turkey to the border of India.
Hold on.
That sounds like the empire Alexander established.
Precisely.
Alexander began his quest for world domination by conquering the largest empire at the time, the Persian Empire.
Whoa.
His conquest officially began when he crossed the Hellesport, a narrow strait separating Greece and modern-day Turkey.
He claimed victory at Granicus River, Sardis, Miletus, Mylesa, and Heliconarsis.
Oh boy, this Alexander fellow sure loved conquering, huh?
Loved it!
After seizing Heliconarsis, he headed north to slash the Gordian Knot, then finally faced Darius III's massive Persian army at the Battle of Issus.
Guess who won?
We know who won.
You said this was Alexander the Great's first big victory.
And he never lost a battle.
I know, I know.
It's just so fun to say.
But wait, there's more.
When King Darius III realized he was going to lose, he fled the battle with his troops, abandoning his wife and family.
Darius's mother was so angry, she disowned him and adopted Alexander as her son.
Okay, that's not weird at all.
After the Battle of Issus, Alexander rejected a plea for peace from Darius.
Then he turned south to capture the cities of Byblos and Sidon and the island of Tyre.
Sounds tiring.
Funny you say that.
Even though tire is spelt T-Y-R-E and not T-I-R-E.
Defeating the Tyrans proved especially tiring for Alexander.
Hmm, smarty pants.
Why do you think defeating the Tyrans proved so challenging?
Was it because, A, as Tyrans, it's in their nature to tire people out?
B, Tyre is an island and Alexander didn't have a strong navy.
Or C, they rolled thousands of ancient tires off the cliffs onto Alexander's army.
If you said B, Tyre is an island and Alexander didn't have a strong navy, You're right.
It's true.
At first, Alexander failed to breach the island's defenses.
Hey, I thought you said he never lost a battle.
Hang on, hang on.
I said at first.
The battle wasn't over.
Alexander went back, amassed a sufficient fleet of ships, conquered Tyre, and took a nap.
Because he was tired.
Yes.
Did he retire?
From conquering, that is.
After Tyre, Alexander furthered his conquest by heading into Egypt, where he consulted the Oracle of Amin, furthering the belief he was a deity or godlike being.
He also established the city that bears his name to this day, Alexandria.
No conquering?
Why, of course there was conquesting.
I just kind of glossed over it.
From Egypt, Alexander reversed course and forged further into the Persian Empire.
In October of 331 BCE, he met Darius III at Gagamella, a city in modern-day Kurdistan where Alexander, Let me guess.
Defeated him again?
Precisely.
At that point, Alexander the Great became... King of Persia!
He then continued in a circuitous march through the Persian Empire all the way to India, in his establishment of the Macedonian Empire.
So is that where the conquering ends?
Yes.
Ah, so Alexander returned home to Macedonia and lived to a ripe old age?
No.
In 323 BCE, on the eve of a planned conquest of Arabia... More conquest?
He's obsessed with conquesting!
But wait, you said there were no more conquests.
There weren't.
On the eve of a planned conquest, Alexander died in Babylon, an ancient city in modern-day Iraq.
How did he die?
Some historians believe it was malaria or fever.
Others think she was poisoned.
Assassinated?
Like his father?
Perhaps.
Either way, Alexander ruled one of the largest empires in ancient history.
Ah, but not all of Asia, as prophesied by Gordius and his knot.
No, but a pretty big chunk of it.
Not bad for a 32-year-old.
32?
You mean he conquered the Persian Empire in his 20s?
As his motto goes, there is nothing impossible to him who will try.
Right.
If only he could have put it towards something a little bit nicer.
Plus an extra new episode every week and monthly bonus content.
Our annual subscription even comes with a seven-day free trial.
Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts or on our website, whosmarted.com.
Just click subscribe.
Oh, and teachers, click on Educators to get Whosmarted Plus for free.
Thanks for smarting with us.
A big double shout out to Paul and Henry in Fort Stewart, Georgia.
Thanks for smarting with us, you two.
We're so happy to hear you use Who Smarted for homeschooling and that you find it so funny and entertaining.
And of course, you love the song.
Was it me?
Was it you?
I think it was you.
This episode, Alexander the Great, was written by Dan the Great Gold and voiced by Adam the Decent Davis and Jerry the Tolerable Colbert.
Technical direction and sound design by Josh.
He's okay, huh?
Our associate producer is Max the Magnificent Kamaski.
The theme song is by Brian the Splendid Suarez with lyrics written and performed by Adam Tex Davis.
Who Smarted was created and produced by Adam Tex Davis and Jerry Colbert.
This has been an Atomic Entertainment production.
Who Smart-ed?
