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Let these English idioms sink in.
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Are you feeling stuck with your English?
We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American host, Aubrey Carter, the IELTS whiz, and Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer coming to you from Arizona and Colorado, USA.
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Part of connection is not just knowing the words to respond when you're shocked, but it's also knowing what you can say culturally and what you can't.
Listen in today for more.
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Hello, Lindsay.
How are you today?
Hey, Aubrey.
Doing great.
How are you?
How's everything?
Excellent.
It's a beautiful day here in Arizona.
Do you have a question for you?
Okay.
When you listen to a podcast or maybe watch a film, do you ever need time to let it sink in?
I really do, but I think I don't take the time, you know because, like as a podcast listener, there's just another episode to listen to.
So I just go right into it.
But I wish I did take more time.
Same.
Every now and then I do.
I'll be like, I need to go on a walk and process this.
But that's rare.
Usually it is we're busy, something else comes up and we don't take that time.
No, it's true.
Well, today we're here for the final installment of a three-part series.
Right, Aubrey?
Exactly.
Stay to the end for details.
You can definitely listen to these out of order.
But in part two, we discussed the phrasal verbs, soak it in and drink it in.
And we mentioned that.
You might think let it sink in has a similar meaning, but it's actually very different.
So we're covering that today and related meanings.
All right, good.
We are gonna close any gaps in our mind about these meanings, but first guys hit the follow button right here on Allers English.
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All right?
Yes, amazing.
All right, let's dive in with this first one.
I had asked you if you sometimes need time for something to sink in.
So when we say let it sink in, we mean to really absorb it, to fully process it, To think about all of the implication or the deeper meaning.
Often, if you read a poem, if you don't take that time to let it sink in, you're missing metaphors, double meanings.
There's usually a lot sort of hidden there.
For sure.
So here's an example.
When Jenna told us she was moving to another country, we all just sat there quietly trying to let it sink in.
Yeah, that happens sometimes when you get sort of somber news and no one really reacts right away.
You're just kind of letting the shock sink in.
Because you're shocked.
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
It's not hitting you.
After hearing the surprising news, he needed a few minutes alone to let it sink in.
And sometimes you'll see someone absent themselves.
I just heard that on Love Actually.
It's sort of a British phrase to remove yourself from a situation because you need time to process.
I thought you weren't a fan of that movie.
I thought you were.
I love Love Actually.
I do.
I don't love the you know, I know we've talked about this the plot line where you know someone sort of being fat shamed and sort of commenting about her own body.
I really hate that.
I think it would be different today.
I'm so glad our culture has evolved.
Some in the way we talk about bodies definitely yeah, but other than that, I really love that film.
Yeah, a lot of aspects I'll I'll give you that are definitely dated and wouldn't fly today, so many, and not just that piece but other pieces too.
But I watch it every year.
I wish I do.
It's not.
It's not the holidays until I've watched it.
You are on team love.
Actually, I thought our team was dividing across lines of not love actually, not watching love actually, and I'm still a fan.
Michelle's also a fan.
Yeah.
I kind of wish they would remake it and re-edit a little something, something, but yeah, I love it.
No, every year, every year.
I think I'll get it on the plane on my way back to Boston.
For, by the way guys, we're recording this a few about a week before Christmas.
So that's the context.
I just watched it like two days ago.
Okay.
Perfect.
Perfect.
All right.
All right.
Good.
So then wrap your head around it would be our next one. right?
So very similar, right?
And so this can be emotional things, same where you need time to let something sink in.
It can also just be more about something that's difficult to understand or comprehend, right?
So maybe when Mark explained that he was switching careers at 40, it took his friends a while to wrap their heads around it.
So that kind of thing where like, you're confused, you don't understand why he's making this choice.
Yep, yep, for sure.
And or I still can't wrap my head around how quickly their relationship changed.
And again, it comes back to shock, right?
You're kind of shocked, you're confused, you're just not taking it in because it doesn't make any sense with what you expected to hear.
Right.
But we do use this more synonymously with let it sink in as well.
I could say like I just saw this documentary and I need time to wrap my head around everything I learned.
And then it would have very same meaning as like, I need to just absorb it.
Yes.
I love it.
And there's a third one today.
Aubrey, what is it?
Make sense of it.
So kind of the same, like understand it.
Something's either confusing or hard to understand.
For example, after watching the news on TV, I tried to make sense of what I had heard.
So this could be anything.
It could be extreme violence that you just can't fathom how that happens in the world.
You need sort of time to try and make sense of it.
Yeah.
And this could be used in a heart sense.
Like you've seen this violence and you just can't take it in emotionally.
But it also could mean like cerebrally.
Is that a word?
Cognitively you can't quite take it in, because you can't make sense of it, because you don't quite understand all the details.
Right.
It could be both.
Exactly.
Yeah.
The second example is more like that.
Right.
She kept reading the text message again and again, trying to make sense of his comment.
Yeah.
So this is more cerebrally like.
Yeah.
I just don't understand what he means.
Yeah, exactly.
Love it.
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All right, Aubrey, we are going for a role play now, my favorite part of our episodes.
So here we are sitting in a coffee shop.
Sounds fun.
Processing a friend's announcement, though.
Oh, I wonder what the announcement is.
OK, good.
Here we go.
All right.
I can't believe Emma is getting married.
I need a minute to let it sink in.
Same here.
I mean, last time we talked, she wasn't even sure where the relationship was going.
I'm having a tough time wrapping my head around it.
Exactly.
And she didn't give us any details.
I'm replaying what she said, trying to make sense of it, but I still feel confused.
Honestly, I think she surprised herself too.
She looked nervous, but excited.
True.
Well, as long as she's happy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, this can happen.
Or sometimes maybe you have a friend who, just like you, were sure you'd be like married and have a kid before that person.
But then they do all that before you and you're shocked, right?
You're just that kind of thing can happen.
Or it just might happen out of the blue, right?
Really unexpectedly.
People's lives change really quickly, you know?
Totally.
You never know.
Yeah.
All right.
So first thing we said here was, I can't believe Emma is getting married.
I need a minute to let it sink in.
Yeah, there's some shock, some surprise.
So you're like, it's taking me a moment to process.
I'm just really surprised.
Yes.
What else?
And I said, I'm having a tough time wrapping my head around it.
So yeah, this is interesting, two friends.
And I kind of love this conversation.
This happens a lot where we're trying really hard to not talk trash about our friend.
We don't want to gossip.
We don't want to say anything negative, but we're both very shocked.
We're both like, and there's maybe this underlying tone of, is she making the right choice?
What's happening for us to use these phrases?
Like I need to, I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around it.
I'm very surprised and I maybe disagree, but I'm trying to be a good friend.
This is a really.
I don't know if this is a cultural thing, but this is a tough thing because when someone has decided to get married to someone and if you don't like the person or you disapprove, there's a really fine line you have to walk.
And basically you kind of can't say like socially, I mean culturally socially, absolutely kind of can't say that exactly.
Right.
That's so tricky.
You feel like you sort of have to just be supportive.
But there is like if you feel like they're really for some reason.
It really is a bad choice.
You almost feel obligated, out of loyalty to your friend, to say something, but it could ruin the friendship.
Right.
Like, if you know something about that person that the person doesn't know, then maybe that's an extenuating circumstance where culturally you could say something.
But if you just don't like them, you probably have to keep it to yourself.
It's true.
I know someone that was in this situation that he wanted to tell his best friend that...
He doesn't think it's a good choice who his best friend is marrying, but he just couldn't do it.
You know, tricky.
It's the same as when someone, if there's like a breakup and you want to maybe really tell him what you thought of that person, but there's a chance they'll get back together.
So you feel like you can't really be that honest and open.
Yeah, it's so true.
Did we go through the last one?
I'm not sure if we did.
I'll know.
I think that makes sense of it.
Yeah.
You said I'm replaying what she said, trying to make sense of it.
But I still feel confused.
Right.
So these are just like polite ways that we're saying.
And we're in public.
So maybe if we were like in private, we'd be like, what is happening?
Yeah, for sure.
But instead we're using these very polite phrases.
This is a little polite, a little bit more polite.
It might be like, emotionally you're trying to make sense of it and cognitively you're trying to make sense of it, right?
Because sometimes it's both.
Yeah, definitely.
Yeah.
Okay.
What are the other part one and part two that our listeners should go to?
Yes.
If you miss these, you can check them out right now.
Episode 2542 was take in phrasal verbs to connect in English.
And then the follow up part two was 2548 absorb these English phrasal verbs.
So that covered more like take it in, take it all in and then soak it in, drink it in.
And then this is your part three.
Love it.
And where should we leave our listeners today for a takeaway?
What is our final thought on this one?
I kind of love what came up here in the role play.
It's really interesting when you use phrases like these to be more careful of a friend's emotions, of big things in a friend's life.
You can't always say like, what are you thinking?
I disagree.
I'm confused.
And so we would use today's phrases.
Yeah.
And I do, I'm going to echo this again.
I really do wonder if this goes across cultures like, or are we especially sensitive to?
Once someone has announced that they're getting married, for example, you don't really talk trash about the person they're marrying.
You really don't, unless it's like something really dire.
And yeah, I'm just curious, maybe we'll have this be a poll question for our listeners for today.
I agree.
I would love to know.
It just tells you connection is about so much more than learning the words, Aubrey.
It's about understanding the cultural context of what we do and what we don't do, and what's fair game and what's a faux pas.
In some ways it might really be better to be more blunt and honest and share your true feelings, because then if someone goes through a horrible breakup or something goes terribly wrong,
You might feel guilty, like you should have said something.
So it's such a tricky thing because you also risk losing the friendship, right?
If you do broach that topic and you say I think you're marrying the wrong person or you could lose a friend forever.
I mean, this is heavy stuff here.
So we're using diplomatic phrases to navigate around this a little bit to respond.
Exactly.
Very interesting today.
I love that cultural piece as well.
And I'm excited for you guys to use these expressions.
Yeah, super interesting.
Good topic today, guys.
Hit follow if you love our style, which is connection, not perfection.
All right, Aubrey, we'll see you soon.
Take care.
See you next time.
Bye.
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