This is an All Ears English podcast, episode 215.
How to surround yourself with the doers when it comes to English and life.
Welcome to the All Ears English podcast where you'll finally get real native English conversation and fluency for business and life.
We believe in connection, not perfection, when it comes to learning English.
Now here are your hosts Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl, coming to you from Boston and New York City, USA.
Today, we are back with our temporary co-host, Christy, the fearless New Yorker.
Let's get to the show.
Who's in your social circle?
Today we're gonna talk about why you need to hang out with the dreamers and the doers and not the naysayers.
And we'll give you one key action that you can do to build up a great supportive social circle.
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Hey, Christy, what's happening today?
Hey, Lindsay.
Good stuff.
Good stuff.
How are you doing today?
You feeling good?
I'm feeling fantastic.
How are you doing?
Good.
I am so excited to talk about today.
Well, today, first of all, is a Deep Thoughts Thursday.
And we have a really interesting topic that we wanna chat about today.
And the idea is how important is it?
I think we've both learned this.
How important is it to surround yourself with the right people?
Yeah, it's super important.
Every day is a trying day.
Like we talked about how I'm not actually fearless.
I have a lot of fear.
And really the only way I get through it is by surrounding myself with positive, loving people.
Yeah, well, I like that you said that.
So you said that a few episodes back that you're not fearless, you have fear.
And I appreciate that you're saying that, because we all have fear, you know, I mean, and actually I think it shows a lot of strength to be able to admit that you have fear, I think.
The people who don't admit that they have fear.
You know those guys.
I think they're in trouble, like when you can't admit that.
But when you can just sit down and you can say hey, I'm afraid right now, like I'm afraid, then that's actually powerful.
So, Christy, what's today's quote that we're going to chat about?
Can you go ahead and read that for our audience?
Yeah.
All right.
So I like this quote.
It says, surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and the thinkers.
But, most of all, surround yourself with those who see greatness within you, even when you don't see it yourself.
Oh, I like that.
I like that.
So the idea here is it's more important to write.
So we need to surround ourselves with people who take action and who dream.
But more importantly, to surround ourselves with people who believe in us and our actions.
So, Christy, have you had you know, what kinds of people do you hang out with in New York?
I mean, how is your social circle supporting you?
Yeah, that's a good question.
Well, my sister, she's a big part.
She's in New York City right now.
And she has always shown that she believes in me.
And My boyfriend actually he.
One thing I really liked about one of our conversations when we were first dating is I told him I said, you know, I would love to build a city one day, like you know, just a real community, because I wanted to be bike friendly and I want to be able to bike and not be afraid I'm gonna be hit by a car.
And I had this passion for and I still do, because I don't like driving.
That's why I'm in New York and most of the time the dates I had been on They kind of just pause and look at me and I can just hear what they're thinking.
Oh, my God.
She's crazy.
That's never going to happen.
But the first thing he said to me was, well – you know what you should do then?
You should buy land now because it's going to be cheaper.
I love that.
And I was like, thank you.
He believed in me and it wasn't even a question.
So that was...
That was kind of nice and that was big for me.
Oh, that's huge.
You know, that's fantastic.
I love that.
And that's a real true test.
You know, that response, that initial response of his, is a true test testimony essentially to the kind of guy he is and the way he thinks.
It sounds like...
He's on the same wavelength as you.
And I also just want to mention for our listeners.
You know guys, this can apply for your English and also for your life, as everything else that we talk about in this show can.
You know, if you share, if you have a dream of being fluent, or you know, you know, going to hollywood and becoming an actor, as we talked about a few episodes ago, and you share that with someone close to you, you know you want that person to say okay, so let's book your ticket right to hollywood.
Or you know what's your plan not oh, i don't think you can do that right.
So we want to make sure that we're surrounded by people who are supporting us.
Yeah, yeah.
Could I add something about one key way to do that?
Yes.
Yeah well, what I learned is that we really need mentors in our life, and the reason is is because they've been there and done that and they see what's possible.
They see us and they often see what we are possible to do, that we Mm-hmm.
An example I can give is that Darren Kimura, who is actually my cousin, but also is an amazing entrepreneur.
He started an energy efficiency lighting company.
And so, you know, I reach out to him once in a while and I think I – a similar conversation.
I said to him, well, I think I would like maybe to be like an Oprah or something.
And I was just really embarrassed.
And he said to me – and I was like you know, I was really embarrassed because also, it seems almost –
Like a selfish goal.
Like I'm not like I want to start this new company that's going to cure cancer.
Oh, I see.
I see.
And I was embarrassed.
And I was like, I mean, I kind of – and he goes – he says to me – he pauses.
Yeah.
He thinks.
He looks at me and he says –
I think that's a great goal.
He's like, you know what, Chrissy, I think you need to write a book.
I think it needs to be like a bestseller.
So I think you need a book because that's really going to help what you're trying to do.
And I said – I was like – and he was dead serious.
He wasn't saying it like, oh, that would be cool if you wrote it.
He was just like, oh, this is what you need to do as if – and with complete –
Faith that that's – and I could do it.
And that was very encouraging.
And just those words, I – honestly, they've – that was two years ago.
I often reach for them to –
Oh, yeah.
I like that, Christy.
That's awesome.
So it sounds like the parallel here is the people that you want to be around when you share your dream with them.
They don't have a block up in their mind.
Instead they actually suggest an action like maybe you should buy the land because it's going to be expensive later, or maybe you should write a book.
You know they go straight to the action.
So you can tell that these guys have a complete, completely different paradigm in their mind about how life works, and that's such an important shift that you know we all kind of need to go through on some level.
But once we do, then we need to surround ourselves with people who have gone through that shift, and one really good way to do that christy, what you've said, is to get mentors.
Yes,
Yeah, I love that.
I love that.
That's fantastic.
And I've been a part of a mastermind group for English entrepreneurs online ESL entrepreneurs over the past six or eight weeks.
And it's been really helpful to just sit down for one hour every week and see what these guys are doing, because you see what's possible.
No one in the group is a genius.
We're not Einstein.
We're just normal people that have dreams and we're doing our best to make them come true by showing up every day.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I love that.
Awesome.
Well, thank you, Chrissy.
This has been, again, super empowering.
And I hope that you guys are going to take these thoughts and go out there and make some great friends who are going to support you in your English goals and your life.
Yeah.
All right.
Sounds good.
Go out and get them.
Yeah.
Thanks, guys.
Bye.
Bye.
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