My dad works in B2B marketing.
He came by my school for career day and said he was a big, row -ass man.
Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend.
My friends still laugh at me to this day.
Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do.
Get a $100 credit on your next ad campaign.
Go to LinkedIn .com slash results to claim your credit.
That's LinkedIn .com slash results.
Terms and conditions apply.
LinkedIn, the place to be, to be.
Hey, I'm Ryan Reynolds.
Recently, I asked Mint Mobile's legal team if big wireless companies are allowed to raise prices due to inflation.
They said yes. And then when I asked if raising prices technically violates those onerous to your contracts, they said, what the **** are you talking about, you insane Hollywood *******?
So to recap, we're cutting the price of Mint unlimited from $30 a month to just $15 a month.
Give it a try at mintmobile .com slash switch.
$45 upfront payment equivalent to $15 per month.
New customers on first three -month plan only.
Taxes and fees extra.
Speeds lower above 40 gigabytes of details.
You're listening to Luke's English podcast.
For more information, visit teachaluke .co .uk.
Hello listeners. Welcome back to the podcast.
So, let me tell you about this episode that you're about to listen to.
I've decided to do another funny English signs episode because the last one was quite well received.
People seem to enjoy it.
Got lots of comments from people saying that they were laughing out loud and that they enjoy the combination of some funny stuff and some learning English.
So, let's do the second part of this episode because I've got another set of funny signs to talk to you about.
There's a PDF for this.
You'll find the link for the PDF in the episode description, the show notes, wherever you are listening to this, have a look in the episode show notes and there you will see a link for the PDF.
You can just get it directly from there.
You'll also find it on the page for this episode on my website.
Okay, so I'm going to start reading from that PDF in just a second.
You'll see notes. You'll see the signs I'm talking about and vocabulary list as well, a nicely detailed vocab list which covers lots of the bits of vocabulary which I will be pointing out during this episode.
All right, okay then.
So, let's have a look at the PDF right now.
Here we go. Welcome back.
This is part two of this two -part episode in which I'm looking at some badly worded signs from around the world including English -speaking countries.
These signs are written in either incorrect or ambiguous English resulting in some unintended meanings which are actually very funny or strange.
I should say that some of these signs have rude meanings and they'll probably be some rude jokes in here.
Okay, so if you're listening with kids be cautious.
Some of the jokes here are NSFW which means not safe for work and also not really appropriate for children.
Okay, so I have a big list of these funny signs.
In part one of this, have you heard part one yet?
In part one which was the previous episode, I went through the first half of my list which included funny signs like these found in a bar in Norway.
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar which should probably just be no children allowed unless they really mean that they need women to stop giving birth to children in the bar which I would understand because that's not the appropriate place to give birth to children but I think what they
mean is no children allowed.
This one in a hotel in Acapulco, the manager has personally passed all the water served here.
If you're drinking the water and you read that then yes you might end up spitting all the water out.
So the manager has personally passed all the water here, that sounds like the manager has urinated all of the water personally.
He took the time to personally urinate all of the water served.
Yeah, but no to pass water you see can mean to urinate but no what this really means is that the manager has personally checked all the water served here and don't worry it's safe to drink.
This one found in some hotel air conditioner instructions in Japan, cools and heats.
Spelled wrong, should be cools and heats without E.
Cools and hetes should be cools and heats.
If you want condition of warm air in your room please control yourself which should be you can control this air conditioner yourself using the thermostat or feel free to control the air conditioner yourself using the thermostat if you'd like warm air or cool air in your room feel free to control the unit
yourself using the thermostat something like that.
So you get the idea right?
So you get the idea right I'm going to continue going through my list of signs in the same way that I did in the first part.
Also here's a comment from a listener which arrived earlier today actually which arrived yesterday.
Here's a comment from it'smay4071 I laughed out loud by watching it, it's very funny thank you for sharing this so that I can learn by laughing and it'smay continued.
I remember one sign board which said this use less water use less water but it was misspelled useless water use so that's u -s -e less that's l -e -s -s but those two words were joined together and it sounded like useless or it looked like useless water.
Here's some useless water why we serve it I don't know there's no it's completely useless you can't drink it you can't feed it to plants it's just completely useless I don't even know why we're offering it to you but anyway there you go don't use this water it's useless what yes use less water it should have been
anyway so in part two here let's go through the rest of my list with about 20 more signs like in part one I'll read out each sign one after the other see if you can understand what is funny about each one okay what they really mean and how they should be corrected then I'll go back and explain each
one pointing out why they're funny and offering my corrections hopefully this will be a funny way to correct some written English and learn some vocabulary in the process the pdf for this episode has all the signs my notes and a detailed vocabulary list at the end I've put the signs in two sets so let's
start with the first set okay here we go are you ready are you ready you are ready good let's start so this one for this first one in a hotel brochure in Italy it said this this hotel is renowned for its peace and solitude in fact crowds from all over the world flock here to enjoy its solitude hmm this hotel
is renowned for its peace and solitude in fact crowds from all over the world flock here to enjoy its solitude okay I'll explain these in a moment next one in a hotel bedroom in japan you are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid what poor chambermaid you're you are invited to take advantage
of the chambermaid in a hotel lobby in Bucharest the lift is being fixed for the next day during that time we regret that you will be unbearable the lift is being fixed for the next day during that time we regret that you will be unbearable in a supermarket in Hong for your convenience we recommend
courteous efficient self -service for your convenience we recommend courteous efficient self -service in a hotel in moscow opposite the russian orthodox monastery it said this you are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous russian and soviet composers artists and writers are buried daily except thursday
you are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous russian and soviet composers artists and writers are buried daily except thursday right now if you're not sure what's funny about these just hold on because i will be explaining them in a moment this one was it's not exactly a sign this one i think
it's more a kind of headline from a newspaper article but anyway this one was uh found in a newspaper asked uh in a newspaper somewhere in east africa and it went like this a new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers they did what a new
swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers just get in the swimming pool get in it's not even finished get in there uh in a hotel in zurich because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom it is suggested that the lobby be
used because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom it is suggested that the lobby be used hmm i'm not sure that's such a good idea next in a laundrette a laundrette right a laundrette a place where you have your clothes washed in a laundrette in rome ladies leave
your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time ladies leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time and this one's my favorite one an advertisement for donkey rides in thailand would you like to ride on your own ass would you like to ride on your own ass uh okay so let
me now go through uh that set of signs and explain and correct them okay so this is where i'll explain everything and make my corrections so that one in a hotel brochure in italy this hotel is renowned for its peace and solitude in fact crowds from all over the world flock here to enjoy its solitude
that's weird isn't it i thought the hotel so the hope this hotel is renowned for its peace and solitude means the hotel is well known it's famous for its peace and solitude it's peace meaning the fact that it's quiet and calm and peaceful and for its solitude the fact that it is probably isolated from the rest
of the world or you can you know there aren't a lot of people around you can come here to escape from other people right it's cut off from the rest of the world this hotel is renowned for its peace and solitude in fact crowds from all over the world flock here to enjoy its solitude so this is a contradiction in terms
um so crowds from all over the world i think you understand that crowds meaning large groups of people flock here meaning come here in large groups to flock somewhere that means to go somewhere in a large group like a flock of animals like a flock of sheep or something right so crowds flock here means
large groups of people come in large groups to enjoy its solitude but how is it possible to enjoy solitude when there are literally crowds of people from all over the world flocking to the hotel yeah that doesn't make sense does it so maybe a correction could be this this hotel is renowned for its peace
and solitude guests from all over the world come to experience its tranquil atmosphere something like that you know just remove the bit about the crowds flocking to enjoy the solitude because that makes no sense so in terms of vocabulary we've got to be renowned for something or renowned for doing something
means famous well known okay so for example this hotel is renowned for its peace and solitude right or um you know london is renowned for its delicious food and wonderful weather yeah i'm being i'm being for its useful explanations of vocabulary is it i don't know um yeah the hotel is renowned for its
excellent customer service the hotel is renowned for its wonderful rooftop restaurant with wonderful views of the city okay um and crowds flock somewhere as i said to flock means to move in large groups normally we think of a flock of animals like a flock of sheep a flock of birds for example um that's
a noun but it can be a verb to move somewhere in a large group right uh birds flock here uh in the summer right uh a tranquil atmosphere or peaceful atmosphere right calm quiet tranquil peaceful these are synonyms and solitude is just the state of sort of being alone or being far from other people um
right okay moving on so the hotel bedroom in japan you are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid the poor chambermaid now i know what they mean what they mean is that that there must be some sort of chambermaid service which will you know this chambermaid service there's a chambermaid who can clean up
your room or whatever and you can take advantage of this service meaning you can use the service that's available to you right make the most of it but the thing is to take advantage of the chambermaid this has a double meaning which is kind of rude and that doesn't sound like it's very nice for the chambermaid
i have to say um so to take advantage of someone usually this means to make full use of something that's available to you now that would be something right to take advantage of something is to make full use of something that's available for example to take advantage of the free wi -fi in the hotel so i'm
just going to i'm going to take advantage of the free wi -fi and you know do some work on my laptop right so this service is available i'm going to use it um right make full use of it but when we use this phrase to take advantage of someone so when this is used about a person it can mean here we go to
sexually assault someone to take advantage of someone can mean to essentially uh sexually assault them right so you are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid you're going to think what does has the chambermaid agreed to this what what kind of hotel is this um so a correction could be you are invited
to make use of the chambermaid services something like that or chambermaid services are available for your convenience chamber made services are available for your convenience something like that i mean it all it sort of still sounds a little bit dodgy chambermaid services are available for your convenience
okay what kind of chambermaid services do you have in mind um but it's certainly a lot better than you are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid which uh you know that sounds very dodgy indeed um in a hotel lobby in Bucharest the lift is being fixed for the next day during that time we regret
that you will be unbearable uh i like this one a lot so the the problem is the word unbearable and actually unbearable if someone is unbearable it means they are really annoying and you so annoying or difficult that you can't bear them you can't tolerate them right so you know she is absolutely unbearable
means that she's awful she um i don't know who like the noise of the work that they're doing in the next room so they're unbearable meaning i cannot put up with it i can't tolerate it i can't bear it um i'm gonna i can't stay here and work because that noise is unbearable if a person is unbearable it
means maybe they complain a lot or they're very unpleasant or they're incredibly annoying so i just can't sit next to her i just find her completely unbearable in fact i can't really even be in the same room as her um you know i don't know how you you work with her she's i just find her unbearable meaning
incredibly annoying or something like that okay so that's the problem here um during that time we regret that you will be unbearable now i've worked in a hotel and to be honest when something like this happens when the lift is being fixed sometimes the guests can be unbearable by as they complain over
and over again that the lift isn't working but so yeah using the word unbearable here sounds like the guests will be very annoying and intolerable perhaps making complaints and stuff because the lift isn't working now what they mean to say is that it will not be possible for the lift to bear or carry
the guests up and down so to bear someone can mean to lift them or carry them right if but if someone is unbearable it doesn't mean that you won't be able to carry them up and down in the lift it means the other thing that i just mentioned which is that they've become terribly annoying and can't be
tolerated yeah unbearable just means intolerable impossible to tolerate extremely annoying um so the correction here is the lift is being repaired until tomorrow we apologize for any inconvenience during this time or maybe something like the word inoperable or maybe the phrase out of order so the lift
is being repaired until tomorrow and will be inoperable or and will be out of order we apologize for any inconvenience during this time um you know you will you will have to use the stairs something like that okay but unbearable means something else um right i've got a stupid joke here which i thought
of the other day um this is a stupid joke that involves well the that place in Romania that's where this hotel was located so here's the stupid joke where is the best place to reserve a short break in Romania where is the best place to reserve a short break in Romania and the answer book arrest yeah
get it book arrest book arrest book arrest to reserve a short break book arrest okay a little bonus joke there for you you're welcome um so the next one was found in a supermarket in Hong Kong and it said this for your convenience we recommend courteous efficient self -service basically just do it yourself
and you can be nice to yourself while you do it because we won't be nice to you okay just basically just do it yourself we recommend courteous efficient self -service just do it yourself now the correction here could be for your convenience we recommend using our efficient self -service option right um
vocabulary here here courteous uh courteous means polite respectful considerate now if you say for your convenience we recommend courteous efficient self -service it seems to suggest that the other service option which would be using their sales assistance or whatever that they will not be courteous
they'll be rude and they won't be efficient they will be inefficient and they'll take a long time to serve you so for your convenience we recommend courteous efficient self -service so this one in a hotel in Moscow opposite the Russian Orthodox monastery you're welcome to visit the cemetery where famous
Russian and Soviet composers artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday now what they mean to say is that you're welcome to visit the cemetery daily except Thursday so you can visit it every day except Thursday but it sounds like uh Russian and Soviet composers artists and writers are buried
there daily right they're buried daily except Thursday how many famous composers artists and writers die here every day and why there's so many that they have to bury them every day except Thursday for some reason of course this doesn't mean that it means that the cemetery is open daily except Thursday
and not that people are buried there daily so a correction could be this you're welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers artists and writers are buried full stop open daily except Thursday right the one in the newspaper a new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since
the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers so what they threw most of their workers into the swimming pool while it was being constructed the swimming pool is rapidly taking shape meaning it's starting to come together it's on the way to being finished so it's it's taking shape it's starting
to look like a swimming pool right the construction is progressing uh so it's rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers now what they mean when they say have thrown in the bulk of their workers it means that they have got most of their workers involved in the construction of the swimming
pool right to throw some workers in meaning get them involved in the project get them to work on the project but it also sounds like they've thrown the workers into the swimming pool doesn't it rather than throwing the workers into the project yeah so a correction would be a new swimming pool is rapidly
taking shape since the contractors put the bulk of their staff to work on the project right a new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors put the bulk of their staff to work on the project not throw not since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers into a swimming
pool which is still being constructed which suggests it's like they're throwing all of their most of their workers into the wet concrete and this is this is how the swimming pool is progressing you know because luckily most of these workers have really sort of helped to solidify the structure of the swimming
pool and I think when it's finished it's going to be really really good and solid even though we will lose most of the most of our staff in the process so to take shape something is taking shape means it's starting to it's getting closer to being finished it's starting to look like the way it should look
for example if you're building something I don't know what you're building what are you building you're building a shed in the back garden like a little wooden hut in the back garden that you could use to store your garden furniture or maybe a little place where you could go and work on your computer
or something like that so a shed you're building a shed in the back garden it's taking taking all day to build it and at lunchtime you come in to the house and you know your wife or husband or whatever says how's the shed and you say well it's taking shape meaning it's starting to you know it's it's
being built it's starting to look good contractors contractors are would be the organization or the people that have been given a contract to do a job let's say the local town council wants to build a swimming pool here they will get contractors to do it so they'll sign a short temporary contract with this swimming
pool making company and they're responsible for doing it so they can be called contractors some organization or people who are given a specific job to do and they sign a contract you know like a construction job or some other job could be described as contractors often often in construction and the bulk
of something that the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers the bulk of something means most of that thing so the bulk of their workers most of their workers the majority of their workers the bulk of you know what in our language school the bulk of our students come from the European Union you
know something like that and join your podcast and we'll be brief if you're looking for the perfect holiday gift gift scratchers from the California lottery with so many to choose from you're sure to find the right gift for anyone on your list now that your holiday shopping list is figured out enjoy
this bird singing jingle bells give the gift of scratches from the California lottery a little play can make your day please play responsibly must be 18 years or older to purchase play or claim my dad works in B2B marketing he came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man then he
told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend my friends still laughing me to this day not everyone gets B2B but with LinkedIn you'll be able to reach people who do get a hundred dollar credit on your next ad campaign go to linkedin .com slash results to claim your credit that's
linkedin .com slash results terms and conditions apply LinkedIn the place to be to be okay all right in a hotel in Zurich because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom it's suggested that the lobby be used so what kind of hotel is this I don't think the lobby is the appropriate
place for that do you surely it's better if people entertain guests of the opposite sex in the privacy of their rooms so the what's going on here because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom so the impropriety means the in appropriateness the fact that it would not really
be appropriate so the hotel is saying it's not really appropriate for you to invite let's say you know female guests to your room in order to entertain them so please don't entertain you know guests of the opposite sex in your bedroom don't invite them in and go to your bedroom to entertain them because that would be
inappropriate so instead you should use the lobby but it sounds like they are suggesting that you could just maybe have sex with guests in the lobby which is which would be in full view of everyone coming into the hotel it's a very strange sign isn't it that's that's a strange sign I suppose what they
really mean is please don't bring guests into your room to entertain them there because we we don't want people having a lot of sex in the rooms because that would be inappropriate and it's not the kind of thing we want to encourage in our hotel so instead if you do entertain guests of the opposite
sex please do it in the lobby because we will know then that you won't have sex then you can just entertain them and there will be no sex so it's basically like please don't have sex with guests in the hotel rooms if you want to entertain them just bring them into the lobby where no doubt no sexual
activities will take place but to be fair it does sound like they are suggesting that if you are going to invite guests of the opposite sex to the hotel that you just do it do all your stuff in the lobby because for some reason this would be better but that I don't think that would be better would it
I mean I don't know what kind of hotel it is here is a correction to maintain proper decorum so decorum meaning sort of appropriate behavior and an atmosphere and behavior that is appropriate and reasonable that's decorum to maintain decorum meaning where people are well behaved doing the right things
there's a certain level of peace and calmness to maintain proper decorum we kindly suggest meeting guests of the opposite sex in the lobby rather than in the bedroom it still sounds dodgy to me it still sounds dodgy dodgy means kind of like suspicious weirds not quite right so impropriety this is inappropriate
or improper behavior it's a tricky one to correct because the the general message behind that sign is already quite suggestive and a bit weird next one in a launderette in Rome I like this one this is funny ladies leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time which makes it sound
like they are saying ladies just strip naked and enjoy yourselves just take off your clothes and off you go have a great have a great time without your clothes on ladies leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time without your clothes on right so here's a correction it could be
this ladies leave your laundry here and spend the afternoon having a good time so specifying laundry rather than clothes would remove that suggestion that they are saying take your clothes off and then go out naked having a great time leave your laundry here your laundry would be the clothes that need
to be washed and no doubt you've got your laundry in a bag or in a pile or something like that so that doesn't you know that doesn't suggest removing the clothes before you leave them here right I don't know why this can't also I don't know why this can't apply to men as well you know why is it why
is it ladies leave your laundry here why can't it just be leave your laundry here you know guests are invited to leave their laundry here and spend the afternoon having a good time I don't know why it's just ladies but anyway and this one which is actually my favorite one out of the entire list this advertisement
for donkey rides in Thailand a donkey is like a horse but smaller than a horse and often you find donkey rides in tourist places where children can ride on donkeys right a donkey yes like a horse smaller than a horse they are normally quite slow quite strong animals very stubborn animals they go oh
right that's the noise a donkey makes a donkey I think you know so the sign says would you like to ride on your own ass would you like to ride on your own ass which I think sounds like a great insult and is my new favorite phrase which is the sort of thing you could shout at someone from the window
of your car if they have cut you up in traffic or something you want to ride on your own ass or the sort of response you can give to someone who's just said something very stupid to you like you know you want to ride on your own ass buddy what's the problem here it's the word ass of course an ass is actually
a synonym of a donkey so donkey another word for a donkey is an ass a double ass but of course yes the word ass in American English means your bum or bottom not just your bum anyone's bum but ass means donkey but it also can mean bum or bottom and it's kind of a quite a rude word it's not that rude
but it's you know rude enough you know it's used in insults isn't it you want to ride on your own ass get out of here in British English is ass by the way so in ass in American English ass in British English ARSE but ass does not mean donkey but would you like to ride on your own ass I mean it makes
sense would you like to ride on your own donkey would you like to have a donkey ride on your own donkey meaning you maybe you can rent the donkey for the day and it's your donkey for the day and you can ride on your own donkey but would you like to ride on your own ass an ass is a donkey so this is advertising
donkey rides it could just be simply this would you like the word ass completely from the situation but yeah still I just like that as an insult you wanna ride on your own ass what are you talking about okay here comes set two of funny English signs part two here so this is the final round the final
set of signs that I have for you here we go so this one was in a hotel bedroom in Moscow a few years ago I think so it's this if you if this is your if this is your first visit to the USSR you're welcome to it if this is your first visit to the USSR you're welcome to it a dentist's advertisement in Hong
Kong teeth extracted by the latest methodists teeth extracted by the latest methodists an airline in Copenhagen we had this one in part one we take your bags and send them in all directions in an elevator that's a lift an elevator in American English lift in British English in a lift in Paris please
leave your values at the front desk please leave your values at the front desk in a hotel in Athens visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 a .m.
and 11 a .m. daily visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 a .m.
and 11 a .m. daily in a dry cleaners in Bangkok a dry cleaners it's a place where you go to have your clothes cleaned right a dry cleaners drop your trousers here for best results drop your trousers here for best results in a tailors in roads a tailors is a place that makes clothes for you maybe making
suits right for business suits or something better a clothesmaker a tailors in roads order your summer suit because his big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation order your summer suit because his big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation what don't do that all right then so let's
go through those signs then with explanations so the hotel bedroom if this is your first visit to the USSR you're welcome to it because we don't want it you just you can just take it help yourself you're welcome to it so the problem here is that you are welcome to it we use this expression to mean you
can have it if you want it okay for example I'm not using this I don't know what it would be I'm not using this chair this office chair I don't need it so if if you need an office chair you're welcome to it you can have it right so that's the problem there so it sounds like they're saying if this is your
first visit to the USA USSR you're welcome to it because we don't want it you can have it so the correction could be if this is your first visit to the USSR we warmly welcome you USSR obviously doesn't exist anymore so this is from a few years ago anyway we warmly welcome you so the phrase you're welcome
to it as I said this means you can have it if you want it because we don't want it for example I'm clearing out my garage if you want any of these things you're welcome to them so there's like some stuff on the pavement or some stuff in front of my house that I don't want you know if you want any of these
things you're welcome to them how about this do you want this hammer if you want this you're welcome to it because I don't need it anymore right a dentist's advertisement in Hong Kong teeth extracted by the latest methodists which is strange why are we asking why are they asking newly converted Methodists
to remove our teeth so the problem here is the word Methodists Methodists are people belonging to a kind of Christian Church the Christian Methodist Church so Methodists are Christians who are members of the Methodist Church which is a bit strange why is there is this like some sort of Christian tooth
extraction service that's a bit weird so the correction is obviously the word Methodists should be methods teeth extracted using the latest methods right meaning they use the latest ways of extracting teeth these are tooth extraction methods the latest methods not newly converted Methodists which would be
strange but don't worry I'm going to get your teeth removed but don't worry we've got some newly converted Christians not just Christians Methodists as well you know God will certainly help them to remove your teeth in the most efficient way now we mean the latest methods right the airline in Copenhagen
we take your bags and send them in all directions we saw this before I don't think they mean that they will throw your bags left right and up and down it probably means they'll send them to all destinations but the thing is we take your bags and send them in all directions this is actually probably
true because I've seen some baggage handlers at work and they literally were chucking the bags around in all directions that wasn't in Copenhagen by the way I've got oh you know this is this sign has probably been removed it was probably found long time ago of course I'm sure they don't do that in Copenhagen
Airport anyway correction we collect your bags and send them to all destinations the one in the lift in Paris please leave your values at the front desk why would you have to leave your values at the front desk so when you enter this hotel you need to leave your values at the front desk because we are all
nihilists in this hotel we have no values here this is a very sordid hotel leave your values at the front desk and just enjoy yourselves in fact ladies leave your coat clothes here and your values here and just spend the afternoon having a great time in our weird creepy sordid hotel where nobody has any
values of any kind so the problem here is that obviously the word values they mean valuables your valuables meaning you know valuable items like jewellery you know your laptop computer anything valuable these are your valuables right for example the room will be locked during the during the lunch break
so feel free to leave your valuables here or we have a safe so you can leave your valuables in the safe if you want or in this case please leave your valuables at the front desk yes but values values are your your deeply held personal beliefs or your principles that guide your behavior so the things
we believe are important our morals or our ethics so if you leave your values at the front desk it's like you take all your moral principles and leave them at the front desk and then you can just be free to act in the most immoral unprincipled and unethical way that you want in this particular hotel
because this is a very special hotel for people with very special needs so yeah and valuables means important items that are valuable like your computer your phone your jewellery and so on so the correction would be obviously please leave your valuables at the front desk unless of course it is that kind
of weird hotel where it's like in this hotel anything goes literally anything so make sure you you leave your moral principles and values at the front desk and then just leave your clothes here too and just feel free to enjoy yourselves in any way you please this one in a hotel in Athens visitors are expected
to complain at the office between the hours of 9am and 11am daily so this sounds like the hotel staff expect visitors to complain every day between 9 and 11 suggesting that the hotel is terrible suggesting that there's maybe a queue of visitors between the hours of 9 and 11 every day just queuing up
to complain right visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9am and 11am daily why those hours in particular what happens between 9 and 11 every day some kind of horrendous alarm or something maybe at 9 o 'clock there's a horrible alarm which goes on for two hours and during that time
yeah we expect the visitors to come and complain because they will be disturbed by a very annoying noise why nobody knows it's just a very strange hotel it's the most annoying hotel in the world so I don't know what what happens between 9 and 11 some kind of horrendous alarm you know wild dogs will be
released into the hotel between the hours of 9 and 11 so visitors are expected to complain during that time or hideous music is played through the speakers for two hours every morning the smell of farts is pumped through the air conditioning system of the hotel for two hours every day and so you know
visitors are expected to complain at the front desk during that time no that's not what they mean I think what they actually mean is that visitors are encouraged to address any complaints at the office between 9 a .m.
and 11 a .m. daily so not expected to or encouraged to or maybe advised to address any complaints or simply any complaints can be addressed to addressed to to staff at the front at the office between 9 a .m.
and 11 a .m. daily right so that takes away the idea that the customers or guests are expected to complain so we don't expect guests to complain it's just that guests can complain during those hours so any complaints can be addressed to staff at the office between 9 a .m.
and 11 a .m. daily takes away the idea that we actually expect the visitors to complain in a dry cleaners in Bangkok I love this one drop your trousers here for best results you want to take a really great shit this is the best spot for you so just go for it don't worry we will clean up the mess this is a dry
cleaners but if you really need a poo this is the place for you drop your trousers here for best results so to drop your trousers can mean to do a poo right to go to the toilet it can mean that but that's not what they mean they mean drop drop off your trousers meaning leave your trousers here and we
will clean them really well so a correction could be please drop off your trousers here for the best results or simply for best results that's okay please drop off your trousers here or please leave your trousers here yeah for best results okay in a tailors in roads right this place where they make
suits a suit suit is what you would wear to work jacket trousers nice black suit or a navy blue suit or a gray suit or something like that and you get your suit cut and made at a tailors right that's what a tailors is order your summer suit fine because is big rush so this should be because there is a big
rush we will execute customers in strict rotation what they're gonna execute customers in strict rotation because they're too busy logo too many customers this is it's too busy what should we do just okay line them up against the wall we'll deal with this and we'll do it in strict rotation you first
then you then you that's not how you deal with that's not how you deal with that situation so that's not what they mean of course order your summer suit fine because there is a big rush meaning because a lot of people are ordering their summer suits at this time we will execute customers that's the problem
we will deal with customers we will deal with orders in strict rotation so yeah to execute someone is to kill someone now you can execute something meaning make it happen this is what they mean maybe they could say we will execute orders in strict rotation right orders for new suits will be executed
but still not I don't like the word execute because it sounds too much like killing someone so yeah you can also execute an order or a command meaning to make it happen so maybe you can say execute customer orders but certainly not execute customers unless you're talking about lining the customers up
against a wall and killing them in which case this would be the correct expression to use but hopefully that is not the case in strict rotation means done in a strict order in a queue with one person after another in strict rotation first second third and fourth and so on so the correction could be
something like this order your summer suit now due to high demand we will serve customers in the order received yes due to high demand meaning because we have a lot of orders to deal with we will serve customers this is much more positive sounding in the order received first customer second customer
third customer and so on yes okay so that's it that is my set of stupid English signs from around the world over to you have you ever seen any weird or funny signs written in English and can you share them in the comments section and generally what did you think of this episode what did you think and which was your
favourite sign which was your favourite sign and would you like to ride on your own ass when could you say that to someone I mean you shouldn't of course because it's not a phrase that people use it's not this it's not the phrase it's not a phrase that people use but maybe if someone sort of like tries
to rip you off like okay they wipe you clean your windows and the say that's twenty dollars twenty dollars you want to ride on your own ass yeah I don't think it's gonna take off I don't think yes okay so if you look at the PDF for this episode which you can find linked in the description there's a detailed
breakdown there's a deep there is a detailed breakdown for vocabulary items in this episode with definitions example sentences comments memory prompts discussion questions and mnemonic tips little things to help you remember the words and phrases are presented in alphabetical order so for example number
one is contractors a contractor is a personal company that undertakes a contract to provide materials or labour to perform a service or a job for example making a swimming pool example sentence the contractors completed the building renovations two weeks ahead of schedule which never happens normally
they do there's normally a delay isn't there when you get contractors to do some building work contractors are often hired for specific projects with a deadline a memory prompt have you or anyone someone you know ever hired a contractor and how did it go what was it that they were doing and discussion question what qualities
would you look for in a good contractor you want contractors that have got good reviews maybe you've been told about them by word -of -mouth maybe a friend has recommended them and you're looking for honest hardworking efficient people right you do the proper job they don't cut corners to cut corners
is to do things more quickly and more cheaply but not doing it properly like doing things perhaps in a way that's not completely safe that's to cut corners you know if you get someone to fit a kitchen for you in your apartment you want them to do it properly you don't want them to cut corners meaning
you don't want them to maybe do things a bit too quickly and cheaply and maybe not safely enough and mnemonic for this you could think of contract which is an agreement plus the OR suffix a contractor which is the one who does it the contractor and the list goes on I'll let you check the list yourself
in your own time the second word is the word courteous if you remember courteous efficient self -service courteous is an adjective it means polite respectful considerate an example sentence he was very courteous holding the door open for the elderly woman courtesy is often shown in small polite gestures
a memory prompt when did you last encounter someone who was courteous and what was it they were doing did they hope hold a door open for you did they say please and thank you how does courteous behavior impact social interactions well it obviously makes things a bit nicer it brings goodwill to your
social interactions a bit of common courtesy right just saying please and thank you being respectful and so on being nice kind of polite is the kind of it's the it's the lubrication social lubrication that can make things go well you know people are much more likely to treat you with respect if you
treat them with respect and courtesy curt courtesy now it's interesting because it's spelled c o u r t e o us that's curt courteous c o u r t but if the word starts with the word caught although it's pronounced curt courteous but it looks like caught so you could think caught as in a formal setting
where people behave with respect courteous but actually pronounced courteous little mnemonics like that can sometimes really help you remember words but they have to work for you so if you if thinking of a courtroom situation where people are polite and respectful does that help you think of courteous
curtius if it works for you it it'll work and you'll definitely remember the word but little mnemonics little shortcuts for remembering words can be useful but you need to find ones that are memorable for you and the list goes on I'll let you explore that in your own time but otherwise that's the end
of this episode okay everybody all right good I'll be back with more episodes coming soon generally I publish one a week right these days for the last the last couple of years I've been more or less keeping to that rhythm of an episode a free episode every week with maybe a couple of exceptions but it's
more or less been a free episode every single week then if you're a premium subscriber you also get all those extra episodes too which are roughly one series per month I mean my aim is that I give you a minimum to premium episodes a month and normally it's more because normally I do about a series a premium
series every month and series and normally three or four episodes actually I'm currently working on premium series 65 at this moment in time and that will be available for you soon I'm also looking at what I'll be doing in terms of episodes throughout December and into January and obviously it's the holiday
period the Christmas period yeah the Christmas period has begun and that means getting everything ready shopping for presents planning what we'll be doing at Christmas and there'll be some time off a week or two and I might take some time off from the podcast but I'll let you know I'm probably going
to do a rambling episode in December in which I talk about you know stuff like this like what I'm going to be doing during Christmas and what you can expect from the podcast and things like that but there might be a week I might have a week off it depends whether I'm able to keep making podcast episodes
in that time that maybe I'll take some time off during Christmas and I'll return in January but we will see but there's a there is a new premium series coming soon so if you're a premium subscriber watch out for that arriving in the next couple of weeks don't forget premium subscribers you can always
sign into your account at teacherlook .co .uk slash account and that's where you would add LEP premium to a podcast app on your phone which is definitely the recommended way to do it everyone else if you're not subscribed to LEP premium and you want all those other episodes where I always go into details
about vocabulary grammar pronunciation sometimes I tell stories sometimes I have rambles which I then break down for vocab teaching so if you want all those other episodes and this is not just like bonus content this is stuff that I work on a lot you can find out more information at teacherlook .co .uk
slash premium info okay all right good I hope you enjoyed that episode I hope that it was funny and that you had a good laugh and that you learned something let me know in the comments section and I will speak to you next time but for now it's just time to say goodbye bye bye bye thanks for listening
to Luke's English podcast for more information visit teacherlook .co .uk and join your podcast and we'll be brief if you're looking for the perfect holiday gift gift scratchers from the California lottery with so many to choose from you're sure to find the right gift for anyone on your list now that your
shopping list is figured out enjoy this bird singing jingle bells give the gift of scratches from the California lottery a little play can make your day please play responsibly must be 18 years or older to purchase play or claim oh my god it's the coolest thing ever hey guys have you heard of gold belly
well check this out it's this amazing site where they ship the most iconic famous foods from restaurants across the country anywhere nationwide I've never found a more perfect gift than food they ship Chicago deep dish pizza New York bagels Maine lobster rolls and even Ina Gardens famous cakes seriously
so if you're looking for a gift for the food lover in your life head to goldbelly .com and get 20 % off your first order with promo code gift if you enjoyed this episode of Luke's English podcast consider signing up for Luke's English podcast premium you'll get regular premium episodes with stories vocabulary
grammar and pronunciation teaching from me and the usual moments of humor and fun plus with your subscription you will be directly supporting my work and making this whole podcast project possible for more information about Luke's English podcast premium go to teacher Luke dot co dot UK slash premium
info
