Hi, grown-ups.
Today, Fred and I got to meet someone very special.
Cooper, the little live pets.
Ouchies, puppy.
Oh, boy, Mr. Eric.
When I first met Cooper, he had a little limp and a rosy glow to his cheeks.
He needed my help.
That's right, Fred.
Cooper isn't just cute.
He's interactive with over 50 sounds and reactions.
He'll whimper when he's hurt and even try to walk.
But don't worry, puppies.
I mean, kiddos.
You'll get to help Cooper feel better.
You can put on his splint, wet the bandages, wrap them up, and ta-da!
You've made him a real cast, just like a vet would.
And once the cast dries, you can decorate it however you like.
Then give Cooper lots of love and care.
And when he's ready, Cooper will play his happy sound woof woof, to let you know it's time to take off the cast.
He'll lift his head, rest his paw, and walk to his cheerful song.
Plus, Cooper comes with a puppy carrier that transforms into a vet tray, so you can bring your new friend anywhere and keep helping him heal.
I love helping Cooper feel better.
It's like real vet play, but with extra puppy cuddles.
Grownups, bring home Little Live Pets Cooper the Ouchie Puppy today.
Available at all major retailers.
What if kittens played the glockenspiel?
What if unicorns were real?
What if you could fly or travel back in time?
We welcome you to What If World.
Hey there folks, and welcome back to What If World, the show where your questions and ideas inspire off-the-cuff stories.
I'm Mr. Eric, your host, and today we're starting off with a question from a listener named Saber.
My name is Saber.
What's your question?
Why is it daytime all the time?
All right.
Her name is Saber, and she wants to know what if it's daytime all the time?
Oh, Saber, daytime all the time.
I have a certain four-year-old who wishes that were so.
Now, we've got another question from a listener named TJ Mac.
Hi, Mr. Eric and all the What If World people.
My name is TJ Mac.
My What If question is, what if everyone tooted, started tooting because they ate mac and cheese?
I love you.
Have a great day.
Oh, TJ, are you lactose intolerant like me?
If so, I feel for you.
And also thanks for all your other wonderful questions, TJ.
Finally, we've got a couple of cousins named Denali and Sean, both 11 years old, who like reading and video games, and they called in a two-minute long question several different versions of it, in fact, but they all revolved around one theme.
What if Fred the Dog, JF Cat, and Mr. Mouser all went on one big adventure together into the past?
So thank you, Sean, Denali, Saber, TJ Mac, and you know what?
All the rest of you for your call-in questions, writing questions, review questions.
You keep What If World going.
Now let's find out.
What if Fred the Dog, JFK, and Mr. Mouser all went on one big adventure together into the past?
What if everyone started tooting because they ate mac and cheese?
And what if it's daytime all the time?
Your story starts after a quick break.
Hey there, grown-ups.
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Parents.
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That's N-E-X playground dot com to explore active family gaming today.
JFK.
Fred the Dog and Mr Mouser were camping out under the stars, and Mr Mouser had just finished making his incredibly delicious sun-shroom-flavored, glowing yellow mac and cheese.
It shone brighter than the campfire he'd cooked it over as he ladled out a heaping bowl to Fred and JFK and a more modest mouse-sized bowl to himself.
Mouser said fred, your back of cheese is the absolute best.
Said javcot, stop it, you're too kind, said mr mouser.
Now he won't let me get into too much detail about his secret recipe.
But what are you talking about, mr eric?
I'm sorry Fred, it's just I don't have permission to share his recipe.
Is this true, Mr. Mouser?
Are you keeping this delicious recipe all to yourself?
Not specifically, J.F.
Cat, but no one's ever shown much interest in it outside the Mouser family, said Mr. Mouser.
Well, I'm showing an interest now, said Fred.
We're going to take this mac and cheese recipe and share it with the whole wide world.
Maybe even the whole wide universe.
Oh, stop.
It's not that wonderful, said Mr. Mouser modestly.
And I know just the way to do it.
Oh, yeah.
Thanks to Denali and Sean, we get to travel back in time today.
And just like that, Wendy Anna Joan appeared stepping through a portal in time made by her friend the Learninator.
Okay, everybody, slow down and take your time, said the time-traveling explorer.
Traveling in time is not a frivolous undertaking.
Oh, good thing, because I don't know what those words mean.
She means that we should take this seriously.
Oh, yeah, like we should seriously get going soon?
I've got some pretty severe indigestion.
Um, I didn't mean to... Didn't mean to interrupt our amazing adventure back in time.
It's okay, Windiana.
No, I didn't mean to imply that you needed to leave sooner.
More that you probably shouldn't leave at all.
Said Wendy Anna Joan.
She squatted down to get closer to J.F.
Cat, Fred the Dog, and Mr. Mouser.
Her prosthetic cyber leg whirring gently as she did so.
Time travel can be dangerous.
Not just for the world, but for you yourself.
Have I ever told you how I lost half of my left leg?
No.
I don't think so.
Which half?
The lower half, honey.
Oh, right.
Well, to make a long story short, it was before I met the Learninator and I tried to travel back in time all by myself.
Oh, excuse me, said Jafkat, letting out one of those silent kitty toots.
That's none too pleasant, along with a strange yellow puff of air.
Oh, that was weird.
No, no, no.
I just used the common imaginary sunshroom in my mac and cheese to give it a little extra zing.
Hey, was that some kind of exposition I missed while stealing the Learninator so we could travel back in time.
It probably wasn't pertinent.
Okay, great.
Wait, what's that about the Learninator?
Hey, I've been here this whole time.
Yeah, Learninator.
Remember how you got that NOLA-powered upgrade?
Oh, yes.
I wanted to recharge at night like most of my humanoid friends.
Yeah, well, it's nap time now.
It is so sleepy.
Hopefully not too sleepy to take our speaking time.
I think I have one more jump in me.
Um, wait a second, Learninator.
I'm just trying to teach my friend something.
Oh, yeah, quantum mechanics.
Im-a-let-claw your, uh, timey-wimey-ness.
What?
Yes, it sounds like you've learned much.
Let's go!
Hooray!
A time portal!
Said Fred.
Um, just where in time are we going, then?
Asked Mr. Mouser.
I hadn't cat-sitted that.
That's why I'm saying slow down.
Let me just punch in some time coordinates here real quick.
Okay, see you then, Wendy and I Said the sleepy Learninator who still didn't quite seem to understand what was going on as he took Fred the Dog, JF Cat and Mr Mouser into the past.
Oh dear.
Well, they got Learninator with them, so they can't do too much damage, I suppose.
Oh, no.
As you might recall, it had been nighttime only moments ago.
Yet now, the sky shone as bright as day.
And, oh, what is that smell?
A yellowish glowing cloud hung in the sky, spreading like a sulfurous mist throughout all of what if world.
That is extremely unpleasant.
And I think I know who's to blame.
A sickly strange rift in time appeared, spitting out Fred Jojo and Mr Mouser, right in front of where their campfire had been.
But the ground was just a yellow-tinged dirt, and even the trees above looked sickly and wan, hanging limply with even fewer leaves than they should have had this time of year.
Well, we did it.
We made it back.
I had every confidence in us.
Um, my little woodland friends, asked Wendiana.
Where is the Learninator?
The cat, dog, and mouse looked none too healthy themselves as they blearily stared up at Wendiana.
All good.
You haven't changed a bit.
Cataclysm avoided.
Uh, no.
My cyber prosthesis protects me from time anomalies.
But if you look around you And as she circled her finger, the little creatures did look around, seeing the yellow sky and the sickly trees.
Doesn't make any sense.
Yeah, we thought a sunny naps would be really nice for everyone.
And that they'd all enjoy Mr. Mouser's mac and cheese forever.
And that eternal daylight could only benefit local plant life.
Even plants need dormant periods, you know.
Harry goes the only tree I know who owns a dormant.
No, dormant.
Sort of like sleep.
Oh, dear, said Mr. Mouser worriedly.
That must be why Mr. Learninator sent us here.
So you could fix everything.
Do y'all have any idea how difficult it is to time travel without the Learninator's help?
Oh no, we always got his help.
And it was so easy.
Okay, you three.
Can you at least tell me when in the past you ended up?
Well, there were definitely dinosaurs.
Miss, dinosaur times, I'm sure.
Triassic, Jurassic, or Cretaceous.
Oh yeah, all three kinds of dinosaurs, I think.
Those are different periods, separated by tens of millions of years.
Then definitely one of those.
Any other hints?
It was probably perhistoric times, cause I didn't see any books.
Noted.
And the dinosaurs all very much enjoyed the mac and cheese.
And Fred Javcat and Mr Mouser told an incredibly ridiculous tale about how they introduced dinosaurs to Mr Mouser's sunshroom mac and cheese, leaving copies of the recipe written in every animal and humanoid language they knew, as well as bits of the sunshroom all over the land.
But the closer to the present we tried to get, The longer the days became.
So we jumped around in the past a lot.
We had met a few of our different past selves, but they couldn't help either.
Oh no.
And the Learninator could not recharge fully as we couldn't figure out how to switch him back to solar power.
Which is why he should have waited for me in the first ha- Oh, well, you can't change the past.
Oh no, that's exactly what we need you to do!
Right, well, you can't change the past.
So I'm just going to have to try to change it for you.
The glowing yellow cloud that hung in the air had a stifling mac and cheese toot kind of smell.
So Indiana Joan tied her bandana around her nose and rolled up her left pant leg to make sure her cyber prosthesis could move freely.
What are you going to do, Indiana?
Well, you little ones left me no choice but to go on a time climb.
Oh, that sounds fine.
You should have some delicious mac and cheese to fuel you before you go.
I think this world has had quite enough of your mac and cheese.
But thanks for the offer.
Wendy Anna knelt down on her right knee and used her pinky now to press a tiny button on her cyber leg.
A display panel appeared.
A holographic image in the sky, full of numbers and equations.
Wow, is this how time travel works?
Not exactly.
Would you like a little lesson?
Oh, sure.
But after I die, baby.
I'll just tell you when I'm back.
And as she used her hand to calculate her trajectory in time, using the 3D interface...
A staticky, ragged rip in time opened before her.
When Deanna tied her hair back out of her eyes, stepped through the portal to anchor her foot and then reached in to grab a fistful of time.
Oh, fistful of time!
That would make a great title for this episode.
Shh, Mr. Eric already called this story Time Climb.
Shh!
And the random time shrunk just a little bit behind Wendiana.
Dying, dying, dying.
Fred's voice echoed strangely through the colorful, ever-shifting space of space-time itself, where Wendiana climbed.
She had programmed a route for herself to land her smack dab in the middle of the Jurassic period.
Tiny little slivers of time floated by her, moving in every conceivable direction and even some inconceivable directions.
But Wendy's cyber leg caused just the right slivers to light up and she used them as hand and footholds, moving and twisting her body, pulling herself up and stretching herself out and sometimes swinging and diving.
She remembered her first trip through time, when she'd stepped through a similar ragged rift and emerged into this rainbow realm that represented all of space-time, somehow missing half of her left leg, as if it had never been there at all.
She had grown so much since that day, more confident and more careful.
But here in this place, the memory felt as fresh as ever.
She finally saw a precipice.
A flat ledge in time.
And as she pulled herself up on it, a window in time began to appear.
First as tiny as a pinprick, but telescoping and widening into a tunnel that she could just barely crawl through.
And There she was.
And what if world's Jurassic past were somehow dinosaurs that had existed in the Jurassic period but in widely different parts of the world?
All seemed to be hanging out together.
The Dilophosaurus, the Stegosaurus, the towering Diplodocus, the terrifying Ceratosaurus, the flying Dimorphodon winging about beside a Pterodactylus, But were all of them moving just a little more lethargically than you'd expect?
Oh, yes.
And was there already just a little bit of that... Sunshroom mac and cheese smell?
You betcha.
Um, too late, said Wendy Anna Joan.
Feeling fortunate upon seeing the smear of yellow cheese across all these creatures' faces and knowing that at least Wendy Anna Joan wasn't on the menu today.
She went about stretching her body while her cyber leg took some readings.
She couldn't find the Learninator's signal.
He must have already powered down by this point in history.
So she had no choice but to head back to the Triassic period.
Her body was already feeling fatigued, but at least her solar-powered cyber leg was able to recharge and widen her tear in time enough that she was able to reach through with hand and foot and start all over again.
Time and time and time again she climbed, meeting just about every kind of dinosaur you can imagine, except those Cretaceous ones.
She took breaks to rest and forage for food and let her leg recharge and sometimes to just take it off while it gathered more data.
There were a few times when she even fell. as all climbers do now and then.
She would turtle up her body and tuck her head while slamming back into the safety net, her cyber leg deployed, finding herself in strange yellow-tinted futures and even back on what-if-Earth's primordial past.
There were moments where she thought she might never make it, and then she'd remember that first trip through time and how, against all odds, she'd survived and thrived until she finally found this cyber leg and was able to get back home.
If I could do it, then then I can do it again, she said as, with a burst of dynamic strength, she launched herself through one last tunnel in time and finally stumbled across the Learninator, quite literally.
There you are.
You know, I think we should go back to solar power for you after all this.
Oh, whatever you say.
Just carry me back in time.
How am I supposed to do that?
I still have to gather up all the mac and cheese throughout the past and... Already done.
You managed to do that without your time travel power?
I can do great things without the assistance of time travel.
But now it looks like you could use a little help, my friend.
Indeed.
Wendy Etto took one last set of readings, while taking a quick breather for herself, to make sure that all paradoxical fungi and recipe books had been collected.
Okay, if we wait a week while the sun-shroomed cloud clears, you should be able to charge up enough to get us all back to the moment just after I left.
But did you check your seismological readings?
Oh no, Oh yes, the large-scale volcanic eruptions that ended the Triassic period are starting in exactly August, right now.
Wendiana unslung her satchel, quickly gulping the last of the water before throwing out all the other contents.
Learninator, do you think you could fit yourself in here?
I'm not a Transforminator, Wendiana!
Another volcanic eruption shook the earth beneath them.
Okay, you know what?
Maybe I can shrink down just this once.
The Lerninator folded himself into a heavy, but mostly flat, rectangular shape.
Wendiana stuffed him in her bag, tightened the strap so it would hang snugly against the small of her back and then dove through her rift in time as a rolling wave of ash swept by, erasing every trace of Wendiana, Joan and the Learnin' Eater.
Just one last climb, Learnin' Eater.
You did it then.
You can do it again, said the muffled voice of her friend from within her satchel.
She calculated her route, had her 3D projection, map it out before her, and set out to climb.
Her whole body ached.
She was hungry and tired and carrying a number of extra kilograms of Learninator.
Thank you for using the metric system and not saying my exact weight.
Every grip, every step, every swing felt like all she could manage.
And all of space-time seemed to shake.
Scintillating colors moving in a wave as she clung to hand and footholds, riding it out.
Strange.
A wave like that usually means you are close to another paradox, Vendiana.
Be careful, cried the learning eater.
And that's when she saw her.
No, not just her.
Me.
There, huddled on a ledge in time, younger and wilder, bruised but not beaten, sat Vendiana Jones.
This past Joan looked even more worn out than our present Joan, but she was missing one thing.
The cyber leg.
Our Wendiana looked down at her left leg, the prosthesis that had helped her through so much.
My girl, she whispered to her past self, staying out of sight as her own sliver of time floated by.
I hope you remember this one day, said our Wendiana, knowing that she would.
Wendy Anna, what are you doing? asked the Learninator, but she'd already made up her mind.
She dropped the cyberprosthesis and it landed on a golden tetrahedron of light that she knew would float just within reach of Wendy Anna when her past self needed it most.
It made her own future uncertain, but Wendy Anna Joan had never let that stop her.
I did it then.
I can do it again, she cried, climbing through instinct, swinging with confidence, making calculations on the fly that used to take her hours, mapping a path through time and climbing up down left, right and inside out to get there.
The rift in time where she'd began was smaller than she'd feared, and as she approached it shrunk yet again.
It closed right around where her left leg had once been at the start of her first trip through time.
Hey, Wendyanna, you did it, said Fred the dog, still looking a little the worse for wear.
Yes, moments ago, light fell again, and then there you were.
Then I guess my calculations were only off by a few seconds.
That sounds pretty impressive.
I can't even predict when my next hairball will... Hang on a second.
Please ignore him, Wendiana.
Yeah, I just... Wait a minute.
It'll be a mac and cheese ball anyway.
Wendiana unfolded the Lerninator.
Who started recharging under the night sky.
Now who's hungry for some 201 million year old mac and cheese?
Yeah, I could go for some.
Oh, ditto.
Make that thritto.
Why not?
The end.
Zaber, TJ, Denali, and Sean, thank you so much for your questions.
I hope you all enjoyed your story.
Have you ever been in a situation where you knew exactly what to do, but no one would listen to you?
Or maybe have you ever felt like Fred and JFK, jumping heedlessly into the unknown and ignoring expert advice.
What's a mistake you've made recently, big or small, and what did you learn from it?
Talk it over with your grown-up.
Who knows?
It might inspire your next what-if question.
And when you're ready, get your grown-up's permission to email hello at whatifworldpodcastcom with an audio message or just a write-up of your idea.
Fred the dog, sneaking back into what-is world.
Hey, Fred.
Always nice to see you.
To give a big woof-woof to Rumi.
Oh, Rumi, R-U-M-I?
That's right.
Rumi's left us some really nice reviews and sent in lots and lots of questions.
I know, and Rumi, like many of you kids out there, has sometimes expressed disappointment that I haven't answered a question of theirs yet.
My best advice to you, Rumi, and all of you out there is don't wait on me.
Go tell your own story.
I truly wish I could answer every single question, but even if I made an episode every single day, I'd never tell all the stories.
And that's not only okay, but wonderful.
Because you get to imagine your favorite version of your story without having to wait on me.
So thank you, Rumi, and all the rest of you too.
I can't wait to hear your next what if.
I'd also like to thank Karen O'Keefe, my co-creator, my producer, Miss Lynn Craig Martinson for our theme song, and all you kids at home who know that what you've done before, you can do again.
And who knows?
You might even be a little bit better at it.
And until we meet again, keep wondering.
Hi, grown-ups.
Today, Fred and I got to meet someone very special.
Cooper, the little live pets.
Ouchies, puppy.
Oh, boy, Mr. Eric.
When I first met Cooper, he had a little limp and a rosy glow to his cheeks.
He needed my help.
That's right, Fred.
Cooper isn't just cute.
He's interactive with over 50 sounds and reactions.
He'll whimper when he's hurt and even try to walk.
But don't worry, puppies.
I mean, kiddos.
You'll get to help Cooper feel better.
You can put on his splint, wet the bandages, wrap them up, and ta-da!
You've made him a real cast, just like a vet would.
And once the cast dries, you can decorate it however you like.
Then give Cooper lots of love and care.
And when he's ready, Cooper will play his happy sound woof woof, to let you know it's time to take off the cast.
He'll lift his head, rest his paw, and walk to his cheerful song.
Plus, Cooper comes with a puppy carrier that transforms into a vet tray, so you can bring your new friend anywhere and keep helping him heal.
I love helping Cooper feel better.
It's like real vet play, but with extra puppy cuddles.
Grownups, bring home Little Live Pets Cooper the Ouchie Puppy today.
Available at all major retailers.
