Hello and welcome to the English with Neil podcast.
This is episode number 23.
And today we are going to talk about how to have better conversations.
Now.
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All right, everyone, let's get started today.
How to have better conversations.
Now, one of the greatest joys when learning a new language is being able To hold a conversation with someone.
That is the biggest joy you can get.
When learning a new language.
Is being able to share ideas.
And communicate with another person.
But sometimes.
Sometimes conversations can get. a little boring.
Sometimes they're not colorful.
Sometimes they're just not enjoyable.
So in today's episode, I'd like to share some tools with you so that you can have better conversations when you are speaking in English.
So let's start with tool number one.
Tool number one is to be a good listener.
Be a good listener.
When you're talking with someone, really listen to what they're saying.
Don't let your words Or don't let the other person's words go one ear and out the other.
Really pay attention to their tonality, their body language, how they're saying certain things.
Be a good listener.
Be attentive.
People love to be listened to.
People love to talk about themselves.
So if you can be a good listener and really tune in to what they're saying, that is going to help you be a better communicator.
Okay, so tip number one is to be a good listener.
Okay, number two ask for clarification.
I know as, as language learners, sometimes when we listen to conversations we kind of pretend that we know what the other person is talking about, but really we don't know.
I remember when My first few years of learning Japanese and I would speak with native speakers and they would say something and I would kind of laugh or pretend like I knew what they were talking about.
But really, I didn't know what they were talking about.
And what happened was.
That led to lost communication.
It led to the conversation taking a turn or not going anywhere, because I didn't know what they were talking about.
So this tip.
Ask for clarification means if you don't understand something, ask questions.
Ask someone to repeat something again so that you can fully understand what they're talking about.
Because if you don't understand what they're talking about, your conversations will go nowhere.
So if you don't understand something, ask for clarification.
And don't pretend like you understand when you really don't.
The next tip is to play catch.
Think about conversations as playing catch.
Having a mitzvah.
And a ball.
You're throwing the ball and receiving the ball.
You're throwing the ball and receiving the ball.
Play catch.
Play catch with the other person.
And how do you do this?
You do this by being open.
When you open yourself up, when you become vulnerable, when you tell truths about yourself, it makes the other person feel more relaxed and more willing for them to be truthful and honest to you.
Because if you're not being truthful to people, people won't be truthful to you.
So if you want to have a conversation where you're going back and forth in a smooth manner, be open.
Think about the conversation like you're playing catch.
You're throwing and receiving, throwing and receiving.
And the last tip, the last tool to have better conversations is to simply be curious.
Be interested in the other person.
Just be genuinely interested in that person.
Have an interest in what they're talking about.
That's the best way, in my opinion, to have good conversations is to be curious.
If someone says, hey, you know, last week I went to the mall.
Don't just say, oh, okay, that's nice.
No, be curious.
What mall did you go to?
Were there a lot of people at the mall?
What did you do at the mall?
Did you buy anything?
What did you buy?
Did you watch a movie at the mall?
What movie did you watch?
How was the movie?
Or you ran into a friend?
Who did you run into?
What did you talk about?
Be curious.
Remember, people like to talk about themselves.
People love to talk about themselves.
So give back.
People reason to talk about themselves.
Ask questions, but be genuinely curious with the questions.
Don't interrogate them like a police officer.
Right.
You don't want to do that, but just be genuinely curious.
About the other person and their experiences.
And when you do that, that person will also be genuine to you and you guys can have a nice, smooth conversation.
Okay, so let's review what we talked about today.
How to have better conversations in English.
Number one, be a good listener.
Number two, ask for clarification.
Number three, play catch.
And number four, be curious.
And I think if you implement these things into your English conversations, your conversations will be more enjoyable and more fulfilling.
And that is it for today's episode, everyone.
Again, if you would like to take your learning, your listening, your comprehension to the next level, You can join my membership at EnglishWithNealcom.
That is it, everyone.
I hope to see you in the next episode.
Take care and talk to you soon.
Peace.