Welcome to English as a Second Language podcast number 462.
Having doubts about getting married.
This is English as a Second Language podcast episode 462.
I'm your host, Dr Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the Center for Educational Development in beautiful Los Angeles, California.
Our website is eslpod.com.
Go there to download a learning guide for this episode, an 8-10 page PDF guide that.
That gives you a complete transcript of this episode, as well as additional help in vocabulary, cultural notes, comprehension questions and a lot more.
This episode is called Having Doubts About Getting Married.
It's a dialogue between Charlotte and Chris which uses a lot of vocabulary that you might use in talking about someone getting married and someone who isn't sure they should get married.
Let's get started.
What are you doing in here?
The entire wedding party is looking for you.
Well, what's the matter?
You're not getting cold feet, are you?
That's just it.
I'm really having doubts about getting married.
What am I doing here?
I think I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life.
Whoa, slow down.
You're just a little freaked out right now.
That's understandable.
Just don't do anything rash.
I have an irresistible impulse to run.
I've got to get out of here.
You'd better do some serious soul-searching before you decide to leave Carrie at the altar.
It would be a life-altering experience for her and for you.
She may never get over it.
You're right, but what can I do?
If I go through with this...
I may regret it for the rest of my life.
Sit down and stay put.
I'm going to get someone who will set you straight.
Who?
Carrie.
Charlotte begins our conversation by saying, What are you doing here?
What are you doing here means, why are you here?
Charlotte says, the entire wedding party is looking for you.
A wedding party is not the celebration where you eat and drink.
For a wedding, that is called a reception.
The wedding party is actually the group of people who are an official part of a wedding.
In a typical American wedding, you have the man getting married called the groom, the woman getting married called the bride, and they may have friends of theirs who are part of this wedding party.
Usually one friend is called the best man.
Could be a brother or a relative as well.
And for a woman, it's a maid or matron of honor.
That's usually the minimum you have for a wedding party, at least at a formal wedding.
Chris says, yeah, I know, meaning I know people are looking for me.
Charlotte says, well, what's the matter?
Meaning, what's wrong?
Charlotte says, you're not getting cold feet, are you?
The expression to get cold feet means that you are afraid that you are making a mistake.
This is something that is possible before you get married.
It's also possible for other large commitments.
Usually, however, it refers to getting married.
He got cold feet, meaning he decided that he did not want to marry her or he had doubts about marrying her and changed his mind.
Chris says, Chris says, Chris may be right.
Charlotte says, whoa, slow down.
That expression whoa, is one that you could use for a horse that was moving too fast, but we use it informally when we want someone to not talk so fast, to slow down.
Charlotte says, you're just a little freaked out right now.
To freak F-R-E-A-K out means to act in an unusual way because you are very worried anxious, possibly upset.
Someone who freaks out is someone who starts to act in a very strange way, maybe yelling, maybe doing something that they would not normally do.
It's an informal expression for the most part.
It can often be used to replace the word panic P-A-N-I-C, which means the same thing to be scared of something.
Charlotte says that's understandable.
It's understandable that you are freaking out.
She advises Chris to not do anything rash.
R-A-S-H.
To do something rash means to do something very quickly without thinking about it.
Usually...
It is something that you later decide is a bad decision, something that you should not have done.
You made your decision too quickly.
A teenage girl goes to get her hair cut and she decides right before they begin that she wants to have very short hair.
She didn't think about it a lot.
It was a rash decision.
And when she got home, she decided it was a bad idea.
I don't have this problem with haircuts anymore myself, personally.
There are other meanings of this word rash.
Take a look at our learning guide for some additional explanations.
Chris says, I have an irresistible impulse to run.
Something that is irresistible is something that is not resistible.
The IR at the beginning of the word means not.
So irresistible means you cannot say no to something.
It's something that you have to do because it is very desirable.
An impulse is a desire to do something, especially if it comes very quickly, without a lot of thinking.
You could have, for example, a rash impulse, a decision you make very quickly.
An irresistible impulse means it's something that you can't say no to.
You must do it.
Well, Chris has an irresistible impulse to run, meaning to leave this situation, in this case, his wedding.
He says, I've got to get out of here.
I have to leave.
Charlotte says you'd better do some serious soul searching before you decide to leave Carrie at the altar.
Soul searching is a period of time when you think about what you really want, what your life is about, what the meaning of your life is.
That would be soul searching.
To leave someone at the altar means to decide very quickly at the wedding that you are not going to get married.
This happens usually in movies, not so much in real life.
People decide they don't want to get married and they just leave the church or leave the place where the marriage is taking place and they don't get married.
Then, of course, they find the true love of their life and they marry that person and they live a wonderfully happy life.
Well, not always.
Charlotte says that Chris needs to do some soul searching before he decides to leave Carrie, his bride, his soon-to-be wife, at the altar.
Charlotte says it would be a life-altering experience for her and for you.
To alter, A-L-T-E-R, means to change something.
So a life-altering decision would be an event that changes your life forever.
She may never get over it, Charlotte says, meaning Carrie will never recover, will never be able to live her life normally again because of this very bad and painful experience.
Chris says, you're right, but what can I do?
If I go through with this...
To go through with something means to do something that you said you would do, even if you don't want to.
To keep a promise is another way of saying that.
Go through has a couple of different meanings in English however, so take a look at the learning guide for a complete explanation of that expression.
Chris is saying if I go through with this, if I decide to get married, I may regret it for the rest of my life.
To regret something means to feel bad about something that you have done in the past, something you wish you had not done.
Charlotte says sit down and stay put, meaning don't move.
To stay put means not to move.
I'm going to get someone who will set you straight.
To set someone straight is a phrasal verb meaning to correct someone, to make sure that someone understands the situation correctly, to help someone know what the truth of the situation is.
Chris asks, who, who is this person?
And Charlotte says, Carrie, your bride, your fiancé, the person that you said you would marry.
Now let's listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed.
What are you doing in here?
The entire wedding party is looking for you.
Yeah, I know.
What's the matter?
You're not getting cold feet, are you?
That's just it.
I'm really having doubts about getting married.
What am I doing here?
I think I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life.
Whoa, slow down.
You're just a little freaked out right now.
That's understandable.
Just don't do anything rash.
I have an irresistible impulse to run.
I've got to get out of here.
You better do some serious soul-searching before you decide to leave Carrie at the altar.
It would be a life-altering experience for her and for you.
She may never get over it.
You're right.
But what can I do?
If I go through with this, I may regret it for the rest of my life.
Sit down and stay put.
I'm going to get someone who'll set you straight.
Who?
Carrie.
Carrie.
This life-altering script was written by our very own Dr. Lucy Say.
From Los Angeles, California, I'm Jeff McQuillan.
Thank you for listening.
Come back and listen to us next time on ESL Podcast.
English as a Second Language Podcast is written and produced by Dr. Lucy Say.
Hosted by Dr. Jeff McQuillan.
Copyright 2009 by the Center for Educational Development.
