Well, I just think it's a simple yes.
Absolutely.
We show up differently because through the year and a half, while we talk about how lovely it's been, we've also learned a lot about each other and how we tick.
And I would say the value set and the trust has skyrocketed through this experience.
Cynthia Haid and Leslie White are identical twin sisters.
Growing up, they had a shared language that nobody else could understand.
Now the two women are in their 60s and they're spending more time together than they ever have before.
In fact, they might even spend more time together than they do with their respective spouses.
As the two of them approach an age where women have too often become invisible in our society, Cynthia and Leslie are on a mission to redefine our society's narrative around aging.
And what I love about them is that they're doing it together.
They've truly embraced social media together to break all of these stereotypes apart.
Online, they call themselves the twin agers.
And taking on this huge project together has brought them closer and deepened their commitment in ways that they never could have imagined.
Hello.
Hi, Leslie.
Hi, Cynthia.
Hello.
How are you?
I'm good.
I've got to say, on my screen, you two do look stunningly similar.
Yes.
That's what identical twins will do.
That is what identical twins will do.
I love love love, love what you are doing, how you are trying to change the narrative around aging and travel and just being together.
But I want to start out a little bit to talk about being identical twins.
I think a lot of people are fascinated by that.
What is your bond like now?
And what was it like when you were growing up?
Oh, that's a very good question.
So why don't I start?
It's Cynthia here.
Our bond growing up was obviously... just very, very close.
When you share the same experiences right out of the womb, it means that we had the same environment and all those things.
So we were in a smaller school, so we were very often in the same class.
So just to carry on like when we were younger, our mom always used to tell us that we had our own language.
There was a shortcut.
You know right from the very beginning on how we communicated with each other.
And I think that probably extends to today in terms of understanding the other person so deeply that we have a shared language that other people don't have.
I think that would be one way to describe it growing up.
And did you stay close as you grew up?
And then as you became adults as well?
Yeah, it's Leslie.
I'll answer that.
Yeah, we've always been close.
As Cyn said, there's a shared language, but it's also we see life the same and we think the same.
And while we will have differing opinions on stuff, the value set is driving a lot of that sameness.
But we did.
I remember it was in grade five and we had moved from Winnipeg to Toronto.
And the school principal at the time had a conversation with our mother.
And he was horrified that we had been in the same class together.
And he said, no, no, no.
You two need to be separated.
You need to build your own identity.
And our mother would never dress us the same and cutesy stuff like that.
But we had been very much a unit.
And that was a pivotal point, I think, for us.
Yeah.
And it continued through school and through secondary school and university, whereby we had a different set of friends.
We took completely different courses, and our lives started to take on much more of a different lens from that standpoint as we were growing older.
And then when we got into our careers, completely different careers.
Cynthia was in the creative industry, in advertising, and still is doing that.
You know 40 years plus.
And I was in the financial services industry and marketing and product development and a whole bunch of different areas.
So very, very different careers that also informed us as different identities as we grew older.
I was just going to add to that.
I was just going to add to that.
Despite all that and some separation as we were growing into adulthood, I had my kids a little bit earlier than Les.
There was still a very, very tight bond.
It didn't manifest in any kind of disconnect or anything.
It just actually informed, frankly, informs what we're doing right now.
We have a diversity of thought and opinions based on where we grew into adulthood to take us into our work that we're doing together today.
And I want to talk a little bit about that work.
There's a lot of stigma around aging and stereotypes around aging.
And as the two of you have aged, you've decided to take that on together.
Talk to me a little bit about how you decided that aging is something to embrace rather than resist.
Yeah, it's Leslie and I'll start, but I know Synth will have comments there.
But, you know, this was a pandemic discussion between the two of us.
That's how it started.
If you remember, we all had to have our own bubbles.
And of course, we were our own bubble.
So we spent a lot of time just talking about life and where we were at and what it felt to be midlife women.
And I think there's a couple of things that became very apparent is that we both felt we weren't done.
We felt that through our life experiences, our voice wasn't being heard.
And we were super, super impressed with.
You know, there's the Jane Fondas and there's the Naomi Watts and there's all these wonderful celebrities who are out there talking about aging and they have the platform to do it and they're doing a good job.
But what we felt, as we kind of talked about it, is where are the voices of what I'll call normal, everyday people that don't have the platform of celebrity and fame to you know?
Put their message out there.
And we just decided that this was something we felt passionate enough that we were going to build something together and espouse our uniqueness in our views to tackle the fact that society needs to hear more from this demographic.
And I think, and just to add to that, I think the one thing that came to light was, despite our different careers because we really were in completely different industries the issues that we were facing were the same.
So the more we talk to others, we recognize that we're not alone in this.
You know, like that feeling of invisibility or marginalization, or you know you're past your prime.
You know due date if you will.
That was something that we felt innately, you know, and I think that's a pretty mainstream conversation these days.
So that was one of the big kind of aha moments that we had to say, what can we do about that?
Because if we, as two people, are feeling it, there's so many others that are feeling this same, this same thing.
Right, right.
And so you chose to tackle a lot of this on social media.
And as influencers, advocating for just more visibility around being a woman of a certain age.
What was it like tackling this project together?
Yeah.
Can I start, Les?
Yeah, you start on that one.
So I think there was a huge learning curve.
We were both very passionate about it, so what a great place to start.
We both have different kind of skill sets that we've honed through the course of our careers.
I'm a producer.
I like to get things done.
Les is marketing strategy.
She likes to think things through.
So, you know, we were actually a pretty good mix, but we would have conversations going.
Les would say, let's think about this.
I don't want to do this.
And I'm like, can we just do something?
So we'd have these like really wonderful debates with each other about how to get going.
But how was it to work together?
Top line, wonderful.
Because we're so aligned, because we're in this place together.
In our life there was no issues about being on the same page and having to reiterate what we wanted to do and goals.
For us, it was more about the learning curve on how are we going to do this?
What's the best way to tackle this?
So it was a pretty wonderful working arrangement.
And it still is, I would say, a year and a half into it, still a really wonderful working relationship.
And I think that we're very lucky to have that.
Yeah.
And I think that you know, with those that have business partners.
I'm sure that this is not a new thing in terms of a discussion between us.
But, you know, it's like having that one word that says, I'm done.
I don't have to explain myself.
This piece is not on.
It's your safe word, so to speak.
Yeah um, so we have this pact that if we're talking about something or trying to put something online and out there and we feel uncomfortable with it, if one of us doesn't want to do it, we have to respect that of the other, and i think that's really important.
I will say too that um, it's more, it's trickier for us while we have um, our voices and their dual voices, etc.
Um, logistically it's tough because we have to do all of our content when we're together.
We're not separating out because our brand is twin agers.
And so that has its logistical challenges, so to speak.
So we are very organized.
We're goal setters.
You know, Tuesday is a filming day.
We've got our ideas in our head and we try to be as authentic and non-scripty as possible.
But if one of us isn't feeling it, we kind of have to push through.
It's difficult having two that you're always having to deal with.
Was there a learning curve for the two of you creating social media over the age of 60?
Oh my God, a huge learning curve.
So this is Cynthia speaking.
My background is in advertising production.
So I make TV commercials.
I make radio commercials.
I make web campaigns.
I do all that stuff.
So I thought, oh, this shouldn't be too hard.
We're just going to, you know, hold the phone up and away we go.
It's not that at all.
The learning curve was enormous because it's a different strategy.
You have to learn the tools.
Like we had to make friends with tech.
Like what tools are we going to use?
Yeah.
How are we going to engage?
We're our own clients and I'm used to working with clients.
So that was my first kind of course correct on that one.
But I think the biggest challenge we had was finding our voice.
And that sounds really kind of simple to do, but it's not because you have to make sure that you are authentic, that your message is clear, that what you're saying is going to be interesting and engaging to your audience.
You have to understand who your audience is.
So yes, the learning curve was enormous, more so than I think either one of us thought.
And I will say that social media is treacherous.
You have to learn it.
You have to learn that.
Like, I'll just give an example.
We did this one little recipe post that really resonated with our audience.
And half the time we kind of hope it's going to like.
Sometimes you don't even know what's going to actually resonate.
So you try a whole lot of things.
So the learning curve is also a lot of experimentation.
But in this one particular post, we made a boo-boo and omitted one ingredient.
Oh.
Was it a crucial ingredient?
Kind of.
It was in the captions, but it wasn't spoken.
It wasn't spoken.
And, you know, as I say, it's treacherous.
I think most of the comments were, you missed the ginger, you missed the ginger.
And it just went on and on and on.
But it was a lesson.
So it was a lesson.
Just, you know, you want to be authentic sometimes.
But you've got to be really careful of what you're saying and you have to know that anything that you say that is wrong is going to be literally pounced on.
Called out.
Called out, exactly.
Yeah, no, it's treacherous.
It's a tough audience.
Yeah, and even pronunciations of words, that gets typed back at you.
Did I hear?
And they spell it a different way, and you're like, oh, I don't know, maybe.
Maybe.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Exactly.
Exactly.
It's hard.
It's hard.
I mean, as someone who is increasingly, increasingly more online, it can be exhausting.
I want to take a quick break.
When we get back, I want to hear if it's better because you get to do this together.
We are back with the twin agers.
We are.
Hi.
Hi, Leslie.
Hi, Cynthia.
Hello.
What is it like?
How has your bond changed now that you're working together?
Because working together is different than just being sisters.
I'll go first.
Okay.
Should I go first, Cynthia?
Yes, go.
So it's definitely better.
But I will say, am thrilled that it's only making us stronger as sisters as well.
And um a year and a half no no, a year and a half in, it does feel like we have work and we call it our work.
We're both very passionate about it, but it is work and we're both committed to it.
Um, and there are times where um, I might not think that, since doing something the way that I would actually do it and vice versa, and you can see that kind of look in the eyes.
But again, it doesn't matter.
And to me, I think the big surprise factor out of that is that it is only making us stronger in other elements of our relationship as sisters.
Yeah, and I would add that Yes, I would 100% agree.
I would add to that because that was a worry when we started.
It's like, you know, we spend a lot of time together anyways.
So, you know, as sisters, now we're layering on this work on top of that.
It's like I mean, I can't tell you how many times a day we speak when we're not together, like multiple times a day texting completely.
You know morning, noon and night sharing things, that we find all that kind of stuff.
But we do also value our sister time and our family time and all of those things.
We do also value the break from it.
So we do like to travel, and we like to travel together, which is, you know, one of my great joys in life, that when we put together a foursome and our husbands get along and off we go on our our um, our adventure.
So um yeah, I mean a lot of people might think, Oh my God, it's like, it's almost like being married.
You know, you're with, like I'm with less, probably as much as I'm with my husband.
Seriously.
I don't know if he'd like to hear me say that.
You know, the truth hurts.
Yeah.
Well, and, and, You know, as with any committed long-term relationship, there's also challenges.
And how do you work on improving your relationship on a regular basis?
Well, I think that it's a really good question.
I think that and this is actually where we're just working through some of our learnings as we approach a big milestone birthday, which we'll leave for that.
But one of the things is open communication.
And I think we alluded to it at the very beginning is, you know, you just have to say it like it is.
And oftentimes take the personal out of it and just say, you know, I'm not feeling this.
We're not going to do it.
And have the trust on the other side there and not have to worry that it's going to implode on that.
And I think also vulnerability comes into this quite a bit is that in order to build trust in relationships, you have to be vulnerable with each other.
So it's not like just saying out of a mystery, I'm not into it.
You have to talk about why you're not into it and the core understanding of all that.
Yeah.
Yeah, and respect that decision and maybe come back to it later.
Or maybe just say, you know what, it's not happening for you.
I still really want to do it.
So I'm just going to put it over here for a while and keep coming back at it.
It might play out differently later.
But it's just about like we're very, very honest with each other.
We have to be in order to do this.
What is something that the two of you have been very honest about with the other one.
That might have been hard to hear.
Okay, I'll start.
I think it goes back to our learning curve on what to do.
And I think at the beginning I might have had a perception that I was going to be better at it because of the industry I'm in.
Oh, interesting.
Les has proved me completely wrong in terms of uptake and learnings on how to do edits, how to work creatively through.
It just comes from a different place.
So there's that.
But I think it's also things like when we're filming one of us turning to the other going.
You look really like you're not happy right now.
We need to do that again because you need to smile.
I say that a lot.
And then less is like, she'll sit there and go, what's with your eyes?
Those don't you know.
So there's there's, there's that you know, ability to be a little harsh with each other, to go, you know, like step it up, or or whatever the case may be.
I think that answered that question.
Yeah.
I was going to say, you know, like many times, you know, if we watch something back and we, it's just horrible because one of us is doing a bad job.
Yeah.
We have to say it.
Yeah.
And then it happens.
Has that kind of honesty gotten easier with age?
Oh yes.
A hundred percent.
Yeah.
There's, there's, there's a empowerment and a confidence that comes with this stage of life.
I'm just going to say that.
So, and I think, Both Les and I have that.
And again that diversity of thought and paths to where we are today.
We both have that feeling of empowerment.
And, you know, a little bit of a thick skin.
You want to tell me something that I'm not doing right?
Okay, lay it on me.
Let's just see where this goes, right?
We'll push back.
We'll have that honest conversation.
We'll agree to disagree if that's how it's going to end.
But, yeah. there's an empowerment at this stage of life, even in relationships, right?
You know, you want your relationships to be strong.
You want them to work for you.
We've spent our lives working for others, looking after others.
Now it's time to look after ourselves.
And in this case, it's for our brand, it's time to look after each other.
Let's take one more quick break.
And when I get back, I want to talk about some of the stereotypes that you tackle.
What do you talk about when it comes to flipping the script on how we age and what it means to be a woman in her 60s?
Okay.
We are back with the Twinagers.
You really are flipping the script on what it means to live well as a woman personally in her 60s.
What are some of the biggest myths that need to be debunked?
So I'll start with one.
I mean, there's so many, unfortunately, that need to be debunked.
You know, when we first started a year and a half ago and took a look at you know the marketing representation and the messages that were out there.
It really was dismal.
And it was a spiraling downward slope that you can expect as you age.
And, you know, you're not going to be flexible to learn new things.
You're not going to be able to keep up with the technology in the world these days.
You're not going to, you know, and it just went on and on and on.
So I mean obviously, just the mere fact of our social media and the tremendous amount that we have grown tells us two things.
One is that our content is resonating with people, but people want to hear more and they want to see and have discussions about all these things.
But I think you have to actually take it up one level and our whole brand is demonstrative.
Just the mere fact of having two 60-plus women out here talking about aging, talking about the good, the bad and the wrinkly, so to speak, of all the issues that come through, demonstrates that we're not done yet.
And even take out the content stuff, the fact that we've gone with, I think, something like just over,
300 posts to 31,000 followers in Instagram shows that anyone can do this.
Age is not the number here.
Yeah, exactly.
Age is not what is holding you back.
And I think the other myth is that you can't contribute in the same ways.
And whether it's in your professional life.
You know, in a work environment there's a lot of women that feel like they're being maybe marginalized, that their voice isn't as important as the younger generation.
You know, so we want to dispel that.
And part of that is, by tackling a project like this, to say you know what you can learn, you can contribute, you can be a role model for The generation just behind you, maybe even your kid's generation.
You know.
All of those things are important to aspire to.
What do people most want to hear from you about how to live life in your 60s?
Well, I'll start with that one.
It's all over the map, which is really interesting.
People love to know, well, first they want to know about us.
So there's the twin aspect, and you know that becomes a topic that people have a lot of questions around.
But they want to know things like day-to-day things how to eat better, what's your fitness program?
How have you built confidence over time?
What do you like to read?
What do you like to watch?
It's very personal in a lot of ways, but it's also tackling situations maybe.
We have aging parents.
How do you deal with that?
How do you juggle everything?
We've got adult kids.
I've got a grandchild.
What does that look like?
It's really just How are you coming into midlife and owning it, if that makes sense?
Yeah, and I think one of the overriding things that we look for when we consider whether or not we're making an impact is when people come back or they comment and they say oh, I'm not alone in feeling this.
I'm not alone in feeling like you know I'm.
Menopause is killing me, or I don't want to eat my dinner at eight o'clock or um.
You know, I hurt my muscles working out.
Or I'm feeling ageism in my workplace or, you know, it can be anything from sort of lofty big problems to you know.
To Lessa's point you know what time do you eat dinner for digestive purposes?
And we talk a lot about.
Our premise at the very outset was we wanted to be really frank and honest about what aging is and what it looks like.
So we'll talk about the ups and downs and we'll talk about you know what.
It really isn't great when you, you know, hurt your back on a big, long walk, but let's talk about this.
So then how far are you going to go to strengthen your back muscles and all that kind of stuff.
And that was an important part of what we wanted to do is we didn't want to sugarcoat it.
And we didn't want to say, yippee, look at, look at us.
Aren't we just fantastic 60 year olds that have got it all figured out and all that kind of thing.
And it was really important to say, you know, everyone is going through this whole process.
And I think one of our more popular posts was when we talked about the big P and the little p in purpose finding your purpose as you go into what your third or fourth act would be and how society has always had this big push on.
You've got to know why you get up every morning and you've got to have a big P and make your, And a lot of people can't do that.
Peace out.
And so we talked a little bit about well, not everyone is ever going to go through life and have a big P like I'm going to save the world from climate change or whatever it is.
But you can have a meaningful, fulfilled life with a bunch of little P's.
And the little P's can be looking after your grandchildren or making sure you have the healthiest life possible, volunteering in your local community.
All those little things add up to a meaningful life.
And those are also sort of nuggets of wisdom that we like to talk about and have our followers weigh in on.
And I think that also talks about one of the other big themes that we try to tackle is transitions.
You know whether it's aging parents or, in my case, I'm Prepping for Retirement, which sounds really wonderful, but it's one of the scariest, most angst-ridden transitions I have experienced in my life.
And it takes a lot of thinking through in terms of where you're going with your financials yes, but also emotional needs and your daily needs and all that kind of thing.
So there are some big topics we do we do try to tackle as well as the smaller ones.
Do you think the two of you show up for each other differently after doing this together for nearly six plus decades?
Oh, that's a really good question.
I will say yes.
I will say yes.
Because I think our relationship...
Well, it started really, really tight you know when you're growing and then we diverged a little bit and now we are coming back.
And the importance of coming back into this relationship is, I think, one of the most foundational, important relationships in my life.
Does that make sense?
Les, do you agree?
Well, I just think it's a simple yes.
Absolutely.
We show up differently because through the year and a half, while we talk about how lovely it's been, we've also learned a lot about each other and how we tick.
And I would say the value set and the trust has skyrocketed through this experience.
Yeah.
Agreed.
Okay, tell me where everyone can can find more of you and and all of this wisdom, all of this wisdom that you've gathered.
All right well, we are primarily.
Our platform is focused on instagram, so at twinagers, you can find us there.
We are also on tiktok.
Whoa, tiktok is a whole different beast.
Yeah, how has that been?
How has that been for you?
I can't wrap my head around the tiktok.
Okay,
So TikTok is really tricky.
And at one point, TikTok, it was almost like a race to see who was more engaged and whatnot.
We're finding way more engagement on Instagram these days.
TikTok is still chugging along.
We are on Facebook, but that's a slow start on Facebook.
But Just look for us on Instagram at Twin Agers and we will be one of the plans as we're starting to do a YouTube channel coming soon.
So there'll be more places there, but we would love to see anybody that wants to join in, and we welcome suggestions and comments for what you would like us to talk about on Instagram.
That is all we have for today.
If you have a story that you would love to see on Committed, email me joe at influentialmediabiz.
That is joe at influentialmediabiz.
I am the host and executive producer of our show.
Our other executive producer is none other than the wonderful Ramsey Yund.
Thank you so much for being here with us today.
I loved this conversation.