Hey everyone and welcome back to another video.
So let's go back in time to last summer.
I've lived in these mountains for six years now.
And last summer, you guys, it was my favorite summer I've had here.
Maybe even my favorite ever.
And I'm not totally sure why.
Maybe it's because this place has started to feel more and more like home.
Or maybe it's because all the things I planted many years ago are finally producing so much abundance.
Whatever it was, I just have such fond memories of those warm summer days.
The summer ended with hot and dry days and wildfires spread through these mountains like crazy.
And my favorite season was ending.
And I guess that's part of life.
Everything ends eventually, whether we want it to or not.
Then the air got colder, the fires died down, and nature started its slow shift towards sleep.
Fall came to this valley last year with rain and fog and Yeah, I started to get ready for the long, dark winter ahead.
Alone.
Winter happened slowly then, all at once.
Snow covered these mountains, the days got really short, and the nights stretched on forever.
If I'm being honest, I struggled a lot this winter.
There were long stretches where everything felt heavy and it was just very hard to stay hopeful.
But I think that is the lesson life keeps teaching me over and over.
Nothing stays the same forever.
As time passes, you start to see the impermanence of everything.
Even the longest winters eventually end.
The snow melts, the light returns, and brighter days come back.
And now that spring has returned to these mountains, it's reminded me just to appreciate the moment I'm in right now, because it's all we really have.
Good morning.
It's almost April now.
The days are getting longer.
I'm feeling very tired this morning.
I don't know why.
I've been up late a lot this week editing my book and I am so excited to drink this coffee.
Oh my gosh.
There is nothing better than the first sip of coffee in the morning.
Like I look forward to this moment all day.
It's my favorite moment of the day.
Like it's early, the sky is getting lighter, the stars are slowly disappearing and you're just like cozied up in your kitchen drinking a coffee.
Ah, there's nothing better than this moment.
I mean like, can you think of a better moment?
Your cat, your coffee.
It's going to be warm today.
I think it's going to be like 60 degrees.
Maybe I'll go swimming.
You guys, I have not swam in like three months.
I don't know why.
I've just been avoiding it.
I need to start moving more people.
It just makes me a stronger person the afternoon now, which means the Sun has already set over the mountain.
It's over up there, so I'm gonna go hike to the top of the mountain.
I do this most days just because it's nice to get a little bit more sunshine in the day.
The Sun sets so early here down at the bottom of a valley and Yeah, it's been kind of cold these days as well.
Like 50 degrees most days, kind of cold.
So it's nice to hike up there and just like feel the sun on my skin.
Life has been beginning to return to this valley.
There's small wildflowers blooming all over these hills and it brings me so much joy.
I think that's why I like the contrast of seasons so much, because it really forces you to appreciate the little things the sunshine on your skin, the light returning.
If I lived somewhere that was warm all year.
Of course it would be nice and there would be a lot less suffering, but the struggle is part of what gives meaning to the beauty.
I think we need both.
We need darkness to understand light.
We need absence to feel gratitude.
We need the harder seasons of life, not because they're good, but because they deepen our ability to feel joy when it comes back.
Without contrast, so much of life would blur together.
But after winter even the smallest return of warmth can feel like just the greatest feeling in the entire world.
It's the simple things, you know.
We spend so much of our lives thinking about time.
How much we have, how quickly it goes, and how we want to spend it.
As I get older, it feels more important to me to build habits that support my health in a real, lasting way.
Not just things that feel good right now, but things that help me feel well over time.
I want to keep running through these meadows, swimming in rivers and hiking mountains for a very long time.
I want to keep feeling strong in the life that I love, and that means being consistent with the small things I do each day that support my health.
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So tonight i am having a party in celebration of the spring equinox.
I honestly, you guys, i did not see any friends all winter because i don't know, i was just like stuck in this hibernation.
Do you ever feel like that?
Like the first day of spring.
You walk outside and it's warm and suddenly you feel like being social again.
That's exactly what happened to me.
So I invited Everyone I know over tonight and I'm making some really fun spring desserts.
The first thing is a fresh milled flour sourdough cake.
So you guys, I have an update for you all.
I know you guys have been very curious about what ended up happening on the 25th, the day I was supposed to meet this mystery man at the lake.
Well, okay, I'm going to tell you what happened.
He never showed up.
And honestly, I wasn't surprised.
It was kind of a crazy idea and as disappointed as I felt in that moment.
I keep thinking about this idea that maybe the things that don't work out in our lives are not supposed to.
Maybe some things fall apart because they were never meant to be forever.
When I look back on my life, the things that were truly right for me usually had a natural flow to them.
Not because they were always easy, but because they just felt I don't know what the word is like aligned.
Like life was leading me where I was meant to go.
Or I had this feeling that life was leading me.
Do you know what I mean?
And then there were the things I tried to force, the things I chased and overthought and held on to for too long or tried to make fit in my life just because I wanted them to.
And almost every time I did that, those things ended up being just the wrong path.
And I don't want to spend any more time in my life forcing something that's not meant to be, you know.
I actually had a moment kind of like this recently.
So I was looking for a commercial bread oven to install in the house for when I start my bakery and eventually, after doing a lot of research, i found the one i really wanted, mainly because it was the right size for what i needed, but also it was just a brand that felt like it was really well made and would last me a long time.
But, as with most things in life, it was very expensive and also an eight month wait after ordering it.
But I remember that night that I found it and realized like this is the one I needed.
I stayed up like almost all night like doing research about this oven, but I couldn't find one anywhere for sale except for on their website.
Then, the next day, literally the next morning, I woke up and opened my phone and the first thing that popped up was on Marketplace this exact oven that I was looking for the night before for sale for half the price of what it was on their website.
This person had posted the ad on Marketplace that morning, and so I immediately messaged them, knowing In my heart I absolutely need to buy this.
And they responded.
So I went there and I bought it.
And when I met the guy who was selling it to me, he told me he was like.
I actually got over a thousand messages about this oven.
And he said when he opened the app, my name was like the most recent one that had messaged him.
And that was why he responded to me, just because like, my name was on the top of the list and he just clicked it and responded.
And maybe this whole thing was just a coincidence.
Maybe it was just a random chain of events.
Maybe my mind likes to look for meaning and patterns where there are none.
But still I cannot ignore that sometimes life seems to move with a certain flow, when you're on the right path.
It's like something deeper in you already knows this is where I'm meant to be.
This is where I'm supposed to go.
And I don't know, I think I'm meant to start this bakery.
And because of that, life just brought me in that direction.
So this fisherman guy not showing up was a little disappointing, but maybe it was also life protecting me from something that wasn't right.
I have spent too much time of my life trying to force things that were never meant to be in the first place.
Too much wasted time on the wrong thing.
And here's the thing, life is short.
You know, I don't want to waste any more time.
Anyways, okay, so let's talk about the things I made for this party.
I made these like brioche danishes, and I've been meaning to try this recipe for a while, because I think this is something that I want to sell at the farmer's market this summer, once i'm able to start the bakery.
Um, because they were, first of all, i think, the best thing i've ever had in my entire life.
Okay, i know i say that a lot, but these were so good, you guys whoa, I feel like, on top of selling loaves of bread, it would be nice to sell things that people can just buy right then and eat while they're there.
Because obviously you're not going to buy a loaf of bread and eat it right away.
Well, maybe you will, but i just kind of want a couple additional things.
Maybe also a cinnamon roll to sell, i don't know.
Stuff that i can sell that people can eat right away would be nice, don't you think?
Anyways, the party ended up being so fun.
I should have filmed some of it, but I was just having way too much fun eating all these things.
And yeah, we drank a lot of wine, and it was.
It was a beautiful night.
And yeah, thank you all so much for watching this video.
And yeah, I can't wait for this next season, you guys.
Okay, I'll see you all soon.
Bye-bye.