The Ramble Before Christmas 🎄 [966] Listen & Learn English with Luke | Luke's ENGLISH Podcast - Learn British English with Luke Thompson

You're listening to Luke's English Podcast.

Hello listeners, welcome back to Luke's English Podcast.

How are you doing today?

I hope you're doing fine.

I have an epic rambling episode lined up for you today.

It's a Christmas special and one of the last episodes of the year.

I've got a couple of other episodes planned before the end of 2025 and then a brand new start for 2026.

But this is one of the final episodes of the year.

And it's probably going to be a long one.

I'm going to be reading from some PDF notes that I prepared earlier.

You can get all of those notes on the episode PDF which you can find linked in the episode description.

So just check the description, check the show notes.

That's where you'll find a link to download the PDF where you can read pretty much everything I'm going to be saying in this episode, except perhaps for some moments when I improvise or go off script.

OK, right.

So let's start the PDF in five.

Actually, wait a minute.

I've got to start.

The lovely relaxing fireplace sounds, the sounds of a burning fireplace, which is traditional at Christmas.

I like to have the sounds of a fire burning in the background during the Christmas episode, just in order to set the right tone, create the right cosy Christmas atmosphere.

So let me just.

There you go.

Can you hear that in the background?

I don't want it too loud.

If it's too loud, it makes it sound like the podcasting room is on fire.

But just a little bit in the background will be just right.

Okay.

So now I can start reading from the PDF in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Here we go.

So this is The Ramble Before Christmas, a December rambling episode.

Ho, ho, ho.

Hello, everybody.

It's December.

It's nearly Christmas.

I'm trying to muster up some festive spirit here on the podcast.

I have a log fire going, a real log fire.

I mean, a video of a real log fire.

But anyway, this is the ramble before Christmas.

To be honest, there aren't that many Christmas references in this episode.

In fact, most of it is a combination of these things.

Responses to recent episodes, listener emails, some jokes told in the comedy corner.

We'll be revisiting the festive comedy corner.

I'll tell some jokes and dissect them later.

And there'll be other moments of random nonsense.

Stick with me and I will talk to you for a while in English, of course.

And I promise that at the end of this, your English will definitely have improved in one way or another.

How could it not?

If you spend however many hours with me, listening to me while you're doing whatever it is you're doing maybe doing your Christmas wrapping or doing some Christmas shopping or some other thing

Maybe you don't celebrate Christmas and you're just doing some normal stuff.

But just imagine spending all that time with me, listening to all of these English words.

There's no question.

Of course, it's going to help you with your English, right?

In fact, if you stick with me all the way until the end, I'll do a vocabulary quiz and you can see how many words or phrases you noticed.

There are 24 bits of vocab in my quiz, and these are all things that I will have said during the episode.

By the time we get to the vocab quiz, these are all things that I will have said.

So yes, I won't tell you which ones they are, which bits of vocab, which words or phrases they are, because I want this.

I want you to keep you interested all the way through.

I want this to be riveting and compelling and gripping engrossing absorbing intriguing captivating enthralling spellbinding hypnotic mesmerising charming bewitching, arresting and thrilling.

And I want to keep you on the edge of your seat throughout.

So just listen carefully and perhaps consider which words or phrases that you can hear me using will come up in the quiz, which will come at the very end of this episode.

And by the way, all of those words, none of those are going to come up in the quiz, by the way.

Riveting compelling gripping engrossing absorbing intriguing captivating enthralling spellbinding hypnotic, mesmerizing hypnotic.

Yeah, I've said that.

Charming, bewitching, arresting and thrilling.

All of those words which are sort of synonyms for sort of words that Basically means something that's very interesting.

OK, so this could be a long episode.

So strap in.

Also consider listening in sections.

You know the score.

You know how this works.

As I've already said, there is a full episode PDF available completely free, and it contains more or less a full transcript of this.

I'll just be sharing all of the notes that I'm reading from.

And to be honest, this one is a finger ramble.

Do you remember what that is?

A finger ramble is when I sort of ramble by typing things down in a writing in advance.

But I just sit there and just type it all out in moments when I can't record the podcast.

So, for example, in the evening, just typing it all out.

And I wrote this over the last few days while sitting at my laptop in three main locations.

One at home on the sofa in the evening.

Two here in my pod room.

And three in my local Starbucks.

There's a little plug for Starbucks there.

Other coffee shops, other generic coffee shops are available.

But yeah, this is a finger ramble, which means that I...

I rambled this out with my fingers, typed it all out in advance, and now I'm reading it to you.

So it's still a ramble, because it was still kind of a stream of consciousness when I was writing it, and I'm now converting that into an audio episode for you here.

But yes, everything... is on the PDF.

All the stuff I wrote and that I'm reading from is on the PDF.

Get the PDF in the description.

Transcript, kind of.

Vocabulary quiz at the end.

Vocabulary list as well at the end.

You're welcome.

Call me Santa.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Ho, ho, ho, etc.

Does that sound festive enough?

I don't know if it does.

I'm trying to be festive and Christmassy, but I'm a little bit tired, to be honest, and so my ho ho ho wasn't as enthusiastic as it could be.

Yeah, ho ho ho everyone, Merry Christmas.

A reminder for myself I have to set a timer for 30 minutes to make sure I don't get dehydrated while doing this.

I'm not even going to bother asking Siri, I'm just going to do it manually.

So bang, there, 30 minute timer has been set.

In 30 minutes, I will refresh myself with some lovely, lovely H2O.

Staying hydrated is important for effective podcasting, of course, and learning as well.

So, you know, the same goes for you.

Don't just rely on coffee and other caffeinated beverages to keep you going.

Water is really your body's best friend, and so keep keep yourself hydrated with good old-fashioned water.

So this is another rambling episode.

Um, you know what?

That is right.

In the past, i've been accused of rambling at the beginning of my episodes and doing introductions that seem to last forever.

These days I've been trying to get that in check.

And I tend to just get straight to the point and do my best to introduce the episode as succinctly as I can, while also preparing you to understand and enjoy what you're about to hear.

But in an episode like this, rambling is the whole point.

In fact, I sort of save up all my rambling for episodes like this, so that if anyone accuses me of rambling I can say well, that's the whole point of the episode.

Just look at the title, Rambling, you see.

So it's traditional at this point for me to correct a common error I often notice in comments under episodes like this.

People say things like this.

They say, I enjoy your rumbling or thank you for another rumbling episode.

And I need to point out that it is rambling, not rumbling.

That's R-A-M-B-L-I-N-G.

So that's with an A, not with a U.

Rumbling, with a U, refers to a sound like thunder in the distance.

Or your stomach when you're hungry.

You say that your stomach is rumbling.

Or the sound of an underground train going through a tunnel or something like that.

So...

The sound of rumbling thunder in the distance, or the sound of your stomach, your tummy, rumbling because you're hungry.

That's rumbling.

But this is rambling with an A. Can you hear the difference?

Can you say the difference?

Rumbling and rambling.

Right.

So rambling with an A usually means either talking or walking in a sort of directionless way.

If you ramble through the streets of Paris, for example, it means that you wander around walking this way or that way, just exploring.

If you go for a ramble in the countryside, it means you go for a walk, perhaps exploring some places that you don't know so well, walking through a forest or something like that right,

That's a ramble in the countryside.

If you ramble while talking, it means more or less the same thing that you talk and you go on in a seemingly random and directionless way.

I say seemingly because here's my little secret.

It's not really that random or directionless.

I do have a decent sense of the things I want to convey to you.

But I'm doing it by talking in a sort of stream of consciousness way, which seems like rambling.

As I have said countless times before, I think this is more effective as a way to help you pick up English by listening to a podcast.

I mean speaking in this sort of rambling way.

I think actually works quite well, because my theory, which is untested, is that somehow it mirrors, like speaking in a spontaneous way, even if I've written it in advance.

But I think I managed to write in the same way that I would talk.

And I wrote it fairly quickly and fairly spontaneously.

So listening to this kind of spontaneous stream of consciousness rambling, I think is is brilliant.

Perhaps better as a thing to listen to for your English, because it somehow sort of mirrors natural thought processes.

It mirrors the natural way that the mind pieces things together.

And.

Makes sense as it goes along.

This kind of linear speaking, I think, is probably a better sort of food for your English than, let's say, listening to a movie or a TV show, which is less natural and is a lot more contrived in the sense that someone has written it and spent a lot of time rewriting it.

And as a result, it doesn't follow natural sort of thinking patterns.

Anyway, that's just an untested theory that listening to rambling is particularly good for your English.

But I've got a hunch that that is...

That's correct.

That rambling is good.

Listening to me rambling is good.

Or listening to anyone rambling like this.

Sort of piecing their thoughts together in this linear fashion is probably good for your English.

But yes, I have been accused of rambling in the past.

Because...

You can accuse someone of rambling, you see, as if it's a crime, because most of the time, if you ramble, it means you don't really get to the point.

Right.

And that's not always what you want, is it?

You know, if you're in a meeting, at work or something and you want things to be done efficiently, you don't necessarily want people in the meeting to ramble on and on and on without really getting to the point.

On a podcast like this, this is great.

This is the whole point of this episode.

But in many social situations, rambling isn't necessarily a good thing.

So people can be accused of rambling as if it's a sort of social crime or something.

And I have been accused of rambling in the past.

And so, yeah, perhaps I have a habit of not getting to the point.

Although sometimes I wonder what the point really is.

Maybe that's the problem.

I don't know.

That's a personal thing I need to deal with.

What is the point anyway?

I don't know.

But I remember one particular occasion and I talked about this in a premium episode recently.

One particular occasion when I was in a staff meeting in a school I worked in, one of the teachers was doing a training session about some aspects of English teaching and other teachers were making points, asking questions.

I made a point.

I can't remember what it is now, but that's probably because I'd never know what the point is.

But I tried to make a point and apparently I managed to use so many words and probably switched from one thing to another so fluidly, without reaching a conclusion, that the teacher leading the session interrupted me, interrupted me loudly in front of everyone and said Luke, you're rambling in front of everyone.

Naturally i was a bit ashamed, but i have come to learn this about myself i have a tendency to ramble.

I'm working on it um, and have been for years.

But as far as the podcast is concerned, it is actually a huge strength, i think.

As i've mentioned, it means i can start talking and basically keep going, and the result is that just podcast episodes come out.

So i have found my space.

I have found my space, not my space, the website, but i have remember that.

Remember MySpace from the noughties with Tom who was everyone's friend.

And some of you won't know what I'm talking about, but it was like an early version, early social network.

Those were the good old days.

Anyway, I have found MySpace, not MySpace, and I've turned my weakness into a strength, I suppose.

Anyway, here is a new rambling episode from me to you.

And I wrote that introduction in advance.

I was feeling inspired earlier.

And then the rest of this episode is mostly going to be spontaneous and not written in advance.

Well, that's obviously not true because what happened is that I couldn't help myself.

And as I said, in the evenings this week, I kept coming back to this document and writing more.

And I've said this before.

This is what always happens with these episodes.

I think to myself, right, I'll do it.

I'll do a rambling episode next Tuesday.

It'll be a sort of like December pre-Christmas rambling episode, and I definitely won't plan it in advance, right.

I'll just make sure that there's maybe an introduction to explain the concept of the episode.

I can do that, and the rest, I'll just make it up as I go along.

So it'll be completely spontaneous.

And then...

I go back to the document.

I'm like, oh, I've just got a few other ideas, a few other things I wanted to add.

I'll just add this.

And then I end up writing the whole thing in advance.

So I've crossed that bit out because it's not true anymore.

The rest of this episode is written in advance.

Anyway, you might be thinking, what are those words?

What are the words going to be in the vocab quiz at the end?

How many of them has he used already?

What words will be in that?

That's what you should be thinking as you go through this, right?

You should be thinking...

Which words are going to come up in that vocab quiz?

So you're always mindful of the specific wording that you're hearing.

Right.

That's the idea.

You see, there is method in my madness.

That's the idea.

That's why I've done that.

As I've said to you, there's a vocab quiz and you have to try and predict which words are going to come up.

That way, I'm encouraging you to notice specific bits of English as you go through this.

You see, I know what I'm doing.

That's really going to help you to be mindful of the language you're hearing, which definitely increases your potential for picking up English from this.

Has it really been over 16 years without a break from doing this?

Has it really?

I can't remember the last time I took a week off. from this podcast.

I've been publishing an episode a week or more.

In fact, recently, it's been two episodes a week because of the premium subscription.

But I've been publishing an episode a week for over 16 and a half years now.

There are nearly 1,000 free episodes.

This is what, 960 what?

960 something.

There are nearly 1,000 free episodes.

I've got no idea what I'm going to do for episode 1,000, by the way.

If you've got any ideas, let me know.

But yes, nearly 1,000 free episodes.

In fact, let's be clear about this.

If you are a freeloader, sorry, I mean free subscriber, then there are currently 977 episodes.

Did you know that? more than the 966 in the title of this episode.

I think this is officially episode 966, but actually in the free episode list there are 977 episodes, because some episodes in the list don't have numbers for one reason or another.

And if you are a premium subscriber, then you have 1,221, or is it 1,222 episodes?

So that's a lot, isn't it?

I've just realised that if we round that up or round it down, basically to a thousand, if we just stick with the round number of a thousand episodes, if you started at the start with episode one and listened to an episode a week, that would last you nearly 20 years of solid listening of an episode a week.

Is that true?

I suppose it is, isn't it?

A thousand episodes... an episode a week, you could be a regular listener for 20 years.

I suppose that's an achievement.

I'm not sure.

I'm assuming that's an achievement.

I'm saying it's an achievement.

So it's something to be proud of, isn't it?

Anyway, it means something.

With premium episodes, obviously that is even more.

Just think of the impact that would have on you.

The sheer number of English words spoken in sentences that would go into your brain in that time and the gains you would make in your learning and some of the stupid shit I've talked about over the years.

Just think.

I mean...

For example, who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark?

I can't believe I made a whole episode just about that single question.

Long term listeners, have you heard that one?

Do you remember that?

Who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark?

I'd made a whole episode about that.

Actually, thinking about it now, seriously, I think it actually is a great question, isn't it?

And obviously 100 worth investing time into discussing seriously on a podcast for learning English.

You might think, OK, I'm going to start listening to Luke's English podcast.

This is what people did.

Oh, good.

He's doing something about passive verb forms.

This is interesting.

Oh, look, narrative verb tenses.

Yeah, definitely.

Phrasal verbs for talking about this.

Who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark?

I don't know what people thought.

I mean, reading the comments, people liked the episode.

So who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark, though?

Assuming that we find a way to create a level playing field.

I mean a situation which doesn't advantage one over the other.

A level playing field, like water deep enough for the shark to swim, but shallow enough for the bear to be able to move around.

Who would win in that battle?

Let us know your answer to this most important of questions in the comments section.

And of course, this is only an imaginary question, and so no bears or sharks need to be harmed.

It's just imaginary, so that's fine.

But if you are interested in this weird thought experiment and you want to hear the full episode, including the answer, which is like the considered answer to that, then it's episode number 77 called Bear vs Shark, a very early one, recorded in my flat in London on a Wednesday evening maybe.

I remember doing it.

I remember sitting at my desk thinking recording that episode, and it was quite exciting because i thought i'm going to do something different.

I'm going to talk about this weird subject.

I don't know what people are going to think about this.

Some of some of my listeners will love this, some people won't, but that's just the way i want to do this.

It was good fun.

I really like that.

Uh, episode 77 bear versus shark.

But anyway, on the subject of the benefits of long-term exposure to the podcast, i'm Go back to one of my first episodes of the year.

In fact, the second episode of 2025.

If you want to get testimonies from listeners who've listened for a long time and have made significant improvements in the process.

The second episode of the year was full of listener testimonies.

But it's amazing, really, but real. that listening to this long-term really does help.

And this makes me very proud.

And you can't imagine how important it is to me that I can work on something long-term like this and get a sense of genuine impact from members of my audience who tell me about how it has genuinely helped them over the years.

So that's just wonderful.

It's very rewarding.

So that was episode 917, which was called Listener Success Stories, I think.

This just in, some breaking news just in, Spotify Wrapped.

Do you know what Spotify Wrapped is?

If you're a Spotify user, every year they give you a summary of your listening data for the year, including your number one podcast of the year.

So it'll tell you, for example, your favourite podcast musical artists that you've listened to, including the top artists second, most popular, third and so on.

And also it'll tell you about your podcast listening habits and it'll show you your most popular podcast of the year based on your your spotify listening, and it'll also tell you how many minutes You listened for.

And some people have been sharing their Spotify wrapped with me, telling me that they've been listening to Luke's English podcast more than any other podcast and how many minutes they listened for in 2025.

So this one, a comment from a listener, Gianni 1099 says who wrote this on YouTube Spotify wrapped your top podcast, Luke's English podcast.

You streamed 4,272 minutes and you're a top 1% fan.

Let's go, says Jianmi.

And I replied, wow, that's great.

So 4,272 minutes, top 1% fan.

That's Jianmi1099.com.

Can you beat Jianmi 1099 if you have higher than 4,272 minutes in your Spotify wrapped this year?

Let me know.

OK, maybe you can beat that.

Let me know.

The best thing to do is probably to at me on X dot com if you use it.

That's at English podcast on X, formerly known as Twitter, or leave a screenshot on my website teacherlukecouk, or you can email me.

Talking of Spotify wrapped.

As well as doing that for the listeners, the users, they also do that for creators as well.

And I got a Spotify wrapped, I guess earlier this week, telling me about how people have been listening to my podcast on Spotify.

So allow me, if you will allow me this moment, to bask in the glory of what has been a great year for Luke's English Podcast on Spotify.

If you are a Spotify listener, thank you for choosing Luke's English Podcast this year.

Here are some stats from my Spotify creators wrapped for 2025.

So in total, I got 2.2 million plays on Spotify.

Nice.

The total number of followers went up to 516000 followers on Spotify, which is an increase of 23 from last year.

So the...

Number of followers went up by 23%.

If you are a new subscriber on Spotify, then hello, welcome.

Thanks for choosing Luke's English Podcast.

In terms of listening time.

Total time that people listen to my podcast on Spotify added up to 84 years worth of listening.

Eighty four years worth of listening.

Incredible.

The podcast got 643 comments because, of course, you can leave comments on on Spotify now.

Italy was the top commenting country.

Hooray for Italy.

Italy left 61 comments on on Spotify.

The podcast was listened to by 154 countries overall.

My top countries on Spotify in reverse order.

Number five is Spain.

Number four is Germany.

Number three, Italy.

Number two, Turkey.

And number one, the number one country on Spotify is Poland.

Hello, everyone.

Jak się masz?

Is that Polish?

I think it is.

And I'm the number one show for 391 thousand fans.

So 391 thousand fans have luke's english podcast as their number one podcast.

Brilliant, thank you so much for listening to lep uh this year.

Let me just remind you all of the lep premium holiday deal.

Just a reminder i'm offering a special holiday discount for luke's english podcast premium 20 off monthly and annual subscriptions and it will last for 12 months.

So if you buy a monthly subscription, the price will be 20 off every month for a year.

If you buy one year in one go, this is the cheapest offer at just four euros a month is what it works out as.

But act fast, because it's limited time only.

All right um, The offer ends at the end of January.

Having said that, I know that some people make New Year's resolutions in January to improve their English.

So if that is you, good news.

I have, as I've said, extended my offer until the end of January.

So it's not just December, but it goes all the way through till the end of January, 2026.

So 20% off LEP premium lasting 12 months.

The offer closes at the end of January.

Also, there's a gift deal.

You can offer LEP premium as a gift to another person.

Uh, in the world, you know just a loved one the the, the ultimate gift for a loved one this year during december and january, also 20 off if you offer lep premium as a gift and you just go to teacherlukecouk premium and then either at the top in the menu you'll see the option the gift option or on a mobile.

Just scroll down until you find the option to give lep premium as a gift and, In terms of premium episodes, the latest ones as I record this, three premium episodes that I published over the last three weeks a vocabulary review for The Door in the Wall right.

Remember that story that I told a couple of weeks ago, The Door in the Wall?

In this premium series P73.

You'll hear me retelling the story and then going through vocabulary from it.

Really useful vocab which can be applied to loads of other things and which will genuinely, genuinely level up your english.

I have my own method and particular set of skills which i always apply to lep premium episodes.

Teacherlukecouk slash premium.

All right, how's the fire?

How's the fire doing it's all right, still going.

Nicely, you can hear it in the background.

I don't want that to be too loud, but i do want it to be audible.

How many minutes left before i drink some water?

Seven minutes, OK.

I am feeling a bit thirsty.

I'll drink it.

I'll drink it at the designated time.

So moving on.

Email of the week.

Do you remember email of the week?

I think I did it once.

I've got a few emails of the week.

Anyway, this is the first email of the week, and it's about ChatGPT's questionable teaching skills.

This is an email from Olga.

Let me read it to you.

Dear Luke, my name's Olga.

I'm from Russia.

I've been listening to your podcast for about five years.

Many thanks for hundreds of enjoyable hours.

I have a funny story for you.

I wrote an email about what I did last week.

It wasn't a real email, just a grammar exercise.

Good idea.

As I had some doubts, I gave it to ChatGPT to correct mistakes.

This is a short extract from the text.

So this is a short extract from Olga's email.

She wrote this.

Last week was pretty awesome.

I've been preparing for my exams for three weeks and finally passed them all.

I got a B on every test.

So where do you think the error might be?

And what do you think ChatGPT's response will be to this?

Where's the error?

Last week was pretty awesome.

I've been preparing for my exams for three weeks and finally passed them all.

I got a B on every test.

So Olga continues, it's after chat GPT did corrections.

Actually I was pretty sure that chat GPT would change.

I've been preparing which is present perfect, continuous into I'd been preparing which is past perfect, continuous.

But it didn't do that.

So Olga originally wrote I've been preparing for my exams for three weeks and finally passed them all.

She thought that it would change it to I'd been preparing, but it didn't do it.

She continues, I asked ChatGPT to explain why it didn't correct this mistake.

And it gave me a very convincing explanation why the present perfect continuous is the right choice in this context.

We even had a short argument.

Suddenly, I came up with an idea.

I opened a new chat and gave ChatGPT the same text to check, but with I'd been preparing.

And surprise, ChatGPT didn't correct it either.

I asked it to explain why past perfect continuous was correct, and ChatGPT explained it very convincingly again.

Finally, I asked about this contradiction.

It says that English grammar is very complicated sometimes and even experts can have different opinions.

What do you think, Luke?

Which answer is correct?

Since now...

I don't think ChatGPT is a reliable expert.

By the way, I wouldn't say since now.

I would say from now.

From now on.

I don't think ChatGPT is a reliable expert.

Since then, since a time in the past, from now.

From now on, I won't think ChatGPT is a reliable expert.

Or since this happened.

Since this happened, I haven't.

Anyway, from now on, I won't think it's a reliable expert.

Or I don't think it's a reliable expert.

Hello, this is Luke from the future.

Just interrupting this episode here.

Sorry for the interruption.

Hi there.

I hope you're enjoying this wonderful episode.

And it's just so long.

And here I am making it even longer.

But that's okay, isn't it?

Merry Christmas.

So the reason I'm interrupting here is because I feel I wasn't quite clear enough in my response to that little error correction.

Olga, sorry for spending so long on this.

Or maybe you're welcome.

I don't know how you feel about this moment.

Maybe like, oh, damn, what a silly mistake.

I know, I know, I know.

Or you're thinking, oh, great, this is good.

I'm learning something.

Anyway, to be clear, I think I would say now, just simply now, now I don't think ChatGPT is a reliable expert.

You could also add anymore, right?

Now I don't think ChatGPT is a reliable expert anymore.

Okay, so this was just Luke from the future. doing this little correction.

Now we can go back to the past and continue the episode.

It's the past for me.

It's actually the present for you.

And in a way, it's actually the future, because at the time I'm recording this, the episode hasn't been published yet.

So it's somehow a moment that exists in the past, present and future all at the same time, which is confusing.

Your big fan forever, Olga.

Okay.

You got the idea right.

I've been preparing for my exams for three weeks and I finally passed them.

I agree with that, Olga.

That doesn't really sound correct.

It should be past perfect to show that the preparing took place before you passed the exam.

So that should be I'd been preparing...

Past perfect shows that happened before I passed, which is in past simple.

That's what past perfect is used for to give background information, to describe things that happened before another event in the past.

In this case, that is when she passed her exam.

Before that, she had been preparing.

It's continuous because that's something she did repeatedly, right, over a period of time.

So the question is, is ChatGPT always reliable?

Well, the answer is no.

Sometimes it makes mistakes and it informs you with great confidence.

You must have noticed this.

It'll just tell you something that's not true, but tell you with total confidence.

And then asking it a simple question.

Are you sure?

When you do that, that often yields a U-turn in its response.

A U-turn, that's just when it does a 180 and completely contradicts itself.

It does a U-turn.

So is ChatGPT more or less reliable than a human teacher?

Well, obviously, it depends on the human, doesn't it, I suppose.

But you know, you'd imagine a qualified, experienced English teacher versus ChatGPT, which one is more or less reliable.

Well, humans might make a similar mistake, to be honest, or perhaps not know anything about grammar if they are just native speakers and not qualified.

So that's quite common.

You know people often learners of English often make that mistake and they think right, I've found a native speaker.

I've kidnapped a native speaker.

And so this person is going to help me learn English.

But they might not know anything at all about the grammar of English or indeed about how to teach it.

And so being a native speaker on its own is not really a qualification in itself.

And a lot of native speakers aren't qualified and don't know what they're talking about.

But also qualified teachers might make mistakes as well.

But yes, you need to be careful and practice critical thinking, of course.

That's the lovely music, which means I need to drink some water, which I'll do in a moment.

But yes, you need to practice critical thinking.

Sometimes you need to question everything and realise that you might not always get a 100 watertight answer, but you have to carry on anyway.

Olga, I think your approach is exactly what I'm talking about here, where you kind of used your knowledge of grammar, your existing knowledge of tenses.

Something didn't seem quite right and you kind of tested ChatGPT and revealed that perhaps your, your instincts were correct.

Um now, maybe there is it's possible to argue that present perfect continuous could be used in some way there.

But i would just keep it simple and say no, it should be past perfect continuous for sure.

Um, It's funny to me that ChatGPT can give an answer with total confidence and then all you need to do is reply are you sure?

And it does a total U-turn saying, oh yes, of course, I'm terribly sorry, I was wrong.

It's almost a bit dangerous, isn't it?

Here's a case in point to prove what I'm saying about ChatGPT and accuracy.

So just now... just before I wrote this, I asked it this.

I asked it a question to test its accuracy.

And I've asked it this before and it got it completely wrong.

But here's the question I asked ChatGPT.

I said, who is the most famous guest Luke has had on Luke's English podcast?

And ChatGPT replied like this.

It said, good question.

It's always very flattering.

Fantastic question.

Brilliant idea.

Good question.

It's hard to say definitively who is the most famous guest on Luke's English podcast.

Famous depends what you mean.

Comedy fame, worldwide recognisability, etc.

But one guest stands out by many measures.

Joe Lycett, the well-known British comedian.

And then it's linked his Wikipedia page.

I don't know if you know Joe Lycett, but he is a very famous and brilliant stand up comedian from England who you do see on television quite a lot.

So one guest stands out by many measures.

Joe Lycett, the well-known British comedian.

And then ChatGPT went on to explain why Joe Lycett is probably my most famous guest.

The problem is I've never interviewed Joe Lycett on this podcast.

I think I've never mentioned him, actually, although I am a fan.

Have I ever mentioned Joe Lycett on this podcast before?

I don't think I have.

So I replied...

Very matter-of-factly, I said, Luke has never interviewed Joe Lycett on his podcast.

And it replied, ah, thank you.

You're absolutely right.

Joe Lycett has never been a guest on Luke's English Podcast.

Let's fix that properly.

Below is an accurate list based on the real guest history of Luke's English Podcast.

And then it listed Sarah Donnelly, Paul Taylor and Amber Minogue in that order, plus some others, including my dad and Anthony Rotuno.

So fair enough.

It did correct that.

But then I said, then I said, what about Jerry Seinfeld, David Crystal and Mark Steele?

And for the record, listeners, Seinfeld was on Luke's English podcast in episode 793.

Don't believe me?

Listen to it.

So Seinfeld was in episode 793.

I asked him several questions.

We had a kind of a partial conversation.

And as far as I'm concerned, that means I interviewed Jerry Seinfeld.

But he was on there.

I met him and I spoke to him, asked him a couple of questions.

He asked me a question.

We had a conversation.

I interviewed him on the podcast.

David Crystal, the famous linguist, the expert on the English language.

He's been on this show in three episodes, interviewed by me twice.

And Mark Steele, the comedian, broadcaster, writer, he was in one episode.

So I said, what about Jerry Seinfeld, David Crystal and Mark Steele?

And he said, ah, excellent.

Let's clarify those three properly because they often come up in LEP dream guest conversations.

I've never had a dream guest conversation, conversation about who my dream guest would be.

Pretty sure.

Here's the accurate situation jerry seinfeld with a big red cross next to it.

He's never appeared on luke's english podcast.

He's been mentioned many times, especially in episodes about comedy, observational humor or luke describing influences, but he's never actually been on luke's english podcast.

So although he's world famous, he is not an lep guest.

Okay, not true?

David Crystal with a red question mark next to it.

This one is close, but Luke did meet David Crystal and recorded an audio letter in which Crystal appeared in a clip.

That's not true.

But Crystal has never sat down for a full interview on Luke's English podcast.

Not true.

We did it twice.

So David Crystal has appeared in audio, but he's not been a guest in a sense of a full conversational episode.

It's not true.

Many listeners think he was a guest because Luke has referenced him, quoted him and played that short audio, but officially not a full guest interview.

Completely wrong.

And then, of course, Mark Steele with a big red cross next to it.

He's also never appeared on Luke's English podcast.

Again, not true.

You get the point, right?

You get the point.

So just completely wrong, but delivered with such conviction.

So Olga, going back to your case, I think your suspicions were valid and you were right to question chat GPT.

Although in my experience, it is despite what we've just proved, it is rarely wrong.

It happens rarely, especially when it comes to questions of language.

To be fair to it, my questions about Luke's English podcast are a bit harder because the information is a bit more difficult to find.

But it still demonstrates its tendency to get things wrong and never to say things like hmm, I'm not sure really, which is what a human would do if they asked a question.

If you asked a question, the human might say, oh, that's a difficult question.

I'm not really sure.

Let's see.

But ChatGPT never does that.

Instead, it's happier to hallucinate an answer which is completely untrue than to just give you something vague.

And AI hallucinations – and, by the way, this is the word we use to describe things that are just untrue, fake things created by AI, including things in images or things in its responses which are just not true.

So, hallucinations happen a lot.

In text answers, this just means writing something that is completely false.

On the subject of ChatGPT, I just wanted to add here –

I'm going to add this in a moment.

Let me drink some water first.

Let's just enjoy the fire and I'll drink some water and then I'll say what I'm about to say.

What was I saying on the subject of chat GPT?

I just wanted to add that I'm quite confident that I'm able to spot when a comment or email to me has been written using it or other AI Right.

Because obviously, you know, listeners get in touch with me.

You comment, you write emails to me.

And I'm pretty confident that I can always spot when a comment or an email has been written using AI.

There are certain giveaways, clues that show me that it's AI generated.

The first thing is perfect English.

And I'm just saying this objectively that before, the days of AI, comments and emails were just much more natural and I could spot common mistakes.

But these days, the level of English went up dramatically when AI came on the scene.

And it's obviously the case that people are using it to essentially kind of upgrade their English.

Hello, another quick interruption.

I should add to that that, of course, there is another possibility, which is that people have just improved their English right.

And it's nothing to do with AI.

So I don't want to take that possibility away from you.

But of course, everyone is using AI now.

And this is totally normal, it will become more and more common.

And more and more we will be dealing with this tricky thing about how to identify if something is AI or not AI, and also choices we have to make about to what extent we use AI.

But I do think that a lot of people use AI when learning English and there are some ways that you can use it.

That might not be good for your genuine improvement in English.

Also, if you are doing these things, by pointing this out, I'm not trying to make you feel ashamed of yourself for using AI to perhaps just do things more quickly in English, right?

Because it's so tempting.

It's so amazing the way it can just upgrade your English and say exactly what it is you want to say, which is an incredibly powerful tool.

Right.

Of course, anyone any normal person is going to be is going to find that incredibly attractive and useful.

Right.

This is the kind of the pull of this kind of thing is that it's so attractive to use.

But just be careful because it might not actually genuinely help your English long term.

But this raises another question.

Oh, my God, I'm rambling.

Luke, you're rambling.

Yes, I am.

Sorry.

This raises another question, of course, which is the future of language learning, and whether AI will just make it completely unnecessary for us to even learn another language, when AI tools will just do it all for us.

And that is another question for another time.

But you can, I don't know, you can leave your comments in the comment section about that one.

But anyway, here are some of the things that I think that people might be doing, which I don't think are necessarily the best habits in terms of your English.

It could be simply writing in your first language and asking it to translate into English, or writing it in English and asking it to upgrade your English.

Now, that's not necessarily bad in and of itself, but it could be bad if you're just relying on it to essentially replace your own processing of English and your own sort of rigor when it comes to writing correct English sentences.

And if you just use ChatGPT or something similar all the time to do that, your English is never going to progress and it's just going to be the same.

I mean, one advantage is that you can see how it's upgraded your English, and then you can try to incorporate the new version, The upgraded version, into the English that you then go on to use.

So it can be a way to to learn by correcting errors.

But you have to make sure that you're not just relying on it to upgrade your English synthetically, that you're actually learning from it.

But anyway, giveaways, perfect English, a kind of confident demeanor.

I mean the kind of tone that ChatGPT uses.

As we've said, it's just like very strident, very confident.

And I've noticed that a lot more recently in correspondence.

Also, certain American punctuation habits.

So bits of punctuation which are just very stylised and certainly American, which I didn't used to see.

A kind of cliched style of describing things.

A certain colourful language.

A literary style, almost.

And it's kind of cliched.

And the dead giveaways are things like moments when AI has said certainly, here's a version with updated English.

You know that bit at the beginning and the end?

People sometimes leave those things in, which is a dead giveaway.

So yeah, I'm pretty sure that a lot of correspondence I get is either translated or upgraded with AI.

So I just wanted you to know that I know.

I don't know how you feel about that.

I mean, I don't want to I don't want to make you feel bad.

I don't want to make you feel ashamed if you're doing that.

But I do want you to just know that.

It might not be healthy for your English.

So, yeah, is it bad that people are using chat GPT to write comments and emails?

Well, I don't know really, but I would like to warn you not to rely on it too much to replace your own writing of English, because that's not how you develop real skills.

AI can be really useful as a learning assistant and tool.

But don't let it do everything for you.

I'm not going to call people out for it, meaning specifically criticise them by name.

But as I said, I just want you to know that I know.

OK, I see you.

I know what's going on.

By the way, if you want my tips for using AI to improve your English, you could check out episode 936, which was recorded with the help of Alistair Budge.

Was it earlier this year?

I think it was.

And if you want my comments on how AI helps me as a teacher, and podcast, because there's arguably nothing wrong with using AI in and of itself.

It's just the way you use it.

And I certainly use it.

It helps me a lot.

Not in this episode, by the way.

This is largely an AI-free episode, except for maybe the vocab quiz at the end.

And a ridiculous Hollywood screenplay which happens after about two and a half hours of this episode.

If you survive that far, you will experience it.

It happens just before the vocabulary quiz.

Everything else is AI-free.

But I do use it, and it's very, very helpful for me as a teacher and a podcaster.

If you want to know how I do that, then you can listen to Premium Series 72 Part 4.

And I go into quite a lot of detail about how I use it as a teacher and podcaster.

Talking of Alistair Budge, I wanted to mention the fact that I was on other people's podcasts recently.

And there are about five different episodes.

So, just in case you didn't get enough of me during the festive period and you want more, even more, you could check out these other five episodes of other people's podcasts that I've been on.

I mentioned this recently, but I wanted to mention it again.

This autumn, apparently everyone decided – I say everyone, it was just five people –

But everyone decided it would be a great idea to interview me for their podcast.

I say everybody.

I actually mean about four people.

It's actually five.

So, just in case you feel you haven't had enough of me, you could check out these episodes of other people's podcasts.

I'll link them on the page for this episode on my website if you want to know how to get them.

The first one is Film Gold with Anthony Rotuno.

Anthony and I talked on his film review podcast about Monty Python's The Meaning of Life.

And this will probably be published as an episode of Luke's English Podcast in the new year.

But you can get a preview of it on Anthony's YouTube channel and on his podcast Film Gold with Anthony Rotuno.

Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, which is...

So the third in a general trilogy of Monty Python films, comedy films.

And, as you may know, I've talked about Monty Python's The Holy Grail, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Monty Python's Life of Brian, earlier this year.

And then we did the third one, The Meaning of Life, which is a mixed bag in terms of a Python film, but it's got some very interesting things in it.

But we had a long discussion about the film and you could listen to that episode.

The other one was the Level Up English podcast with Michael Lavers.

And we we talked about I think the title of it is the reality of running a podcast, or something like that.

So I talked to Michael.

Michael talked to me.

He interviewed me about various things, including doing walk and talk episodes.

And I talked about both of us do episodes like that.

So we talked about our inspiration and motivation and process for making walk and talk episodes.

We talked about confidence issues.

Future plans for Luke's English podcast episodes being on YouTube.

And what people don't realize about doing a podcast.

You can check it out on the Level Up English podcast and on YouTube.

Again, you'll find a link to that on the episode page.

Actually, I should give credit to Michael.

It was after this conversation that I decided to do the mission in Montmartre walk and talk with extra mission objectives.

You know, that one recently walk and talk in Paris in Montmartre.

I gave myself all these mission objectives.

I was inspired to do that after talking to him and he talking about how it makes it more interesting if you add mission objectives by talking to him about, by talking about it with him.

I was inspired to do it and do it that way.

So nice one, Michael.

Thank you for that inspiration.

Leonardo English, a conversation with Alistair Budge from English Learning for Curious Minds.

Alistair and I talked about the UK's royal family on YouTube.

A retrospective of the Paris Olympics from 2024, including the opening ceremony.

We talked about the Louvre bank heist from a couple of months ago.

We talked about the Beatles and why they have an enduring legacy.

And the Beatles are back in the press again with Anthology 4.

Beatle fans, you will no doubt know all about that.

But we talk about the Beatles and why they have an enduring legacy and why I love their story so much.

We talk about book recommendations for learners of English, including The Catcher in the Rye by J.D.

Salinger, which we both like a lot.

You can check that out on YouTube.

All of those are available on my YouTube channel, by the way, in a playlist I have there which is called Luke.

On Other Shows

Also, I was invited onto the British English podcast with Charlie Baxter, but I think he hasn't released the episode yet.

He's been sitting on that one for quite a while.

I don't know if that's because there are some technical issues or because he's just trying to find a way to fit it into his schedule.

I mean, I suppose it will come out eventually.

I don't know when.

But in that one, we played a speaking game in which I was able to complain about things I hated.

And the things I hated were mosquitoes, plastic film that people leave on screens without peeling it off, and horoscopes.

I talked about the plastic screen, plastic film that people leave on screens and don't peel it off.

I talked about that with my brother, didn't I?

On the podcast not that long ago.

So, mosquitoes, horoscopes and plastic film that people leave on screens.

Those are the things that I ranted about in that one.

It was really good fun.

And I'm hoping that Charlie is able to publish it.

We will see.

But check out the British English podcast wherever you get your podcasts.

And that episode with him might arrive at some point.

And I was on Zdenek's English podcast talking about whether AI is any good at doing comedy and humour.

Yeah.

Is artificial intelligence good at comedy?

And we put ChatGPT to the test, seeing how good it is at writing jokes stories, stand-up routines and more.

And I also unintentionally put Zdenek to the test to see if he could identify which jokes were real ones written by humans, and which ones were written by AI.

And it was really revealing and also funny.

It was a great idea for a topic from Zdenek and I really enjoyed it.

And that one will be published on his podcast very soon.

Zdenek's English podcast.

You can find podcast links for that on the PDF.

And I'll link it on the episode page for your convenience as well.

This just in.

Some more news.

Breaking news, everyone.

Remember, Spotify wrapped.

Well, Jianmi 1099 Spotify record has already been beaten.

This information just in.

We've got a listener from where?

I'm not sure.

But anyway, 6,087 minutes.

The comment is this.

It's from Laura.

Laura from uh genova in italy.

Hi luke, i've just watched my spotify wrapped and guess what your podcast is at the top of my list.

I just wanted to thank you for the delightful surprise of your greetings on spotify.

I was taken aback nice expression.

She was surprised.

Why didn't?

She didn't expect that, because i recorded a a video message for my spotify listeners thanking them for listening to my podcast.

Um, So Laura contributed to a premium episode recently.

So, listeners, can you beat...

Laura's 6087 minutes of Luke's English podcast listening this year.

Can you beat that?

Share your Spotify wrapped with me.

But at the moment, for the time being, Laura is the crowned champion of listening to Luke's English podcast on Spotify, with 6087 minutes this year.

How are you doing, listeners?

Are you all right?

How are you handling this episode?

You doing OK?

I've got to go for a band practice in a minute, but I'm going to just read another email of the week.

Then I'll go off and have my band practice.

I don't know what I'm going to do about this fire that I've got raging here.

I don't really want to leave it burning on its own.

I'll have to.

I'll put it out somehow.

I need to be honest, I need the toilet after drinking all that water.

So maybe I can somehow combine those things, putting out the fire and relieving myself.

What am I talking about?

Anyway, before I go for band practice and lunch and then I'll come back and continue.

Here's another email of the week.

This one is entitled A Lepster's Dream.

This is an email from.

Who?

Danny.

All right, Danny.

So here's the email.

A Lepster's dream.

Hi, Luke.

I wanted to share a dream I had last night.

Hello, Luke from the future.

Interrupting again, I'm sorry.

I swear this will be the last time that I interrupt this episode.

You don't mind?

Oh, okay, then.

Well, we'll see.

But I don't want to keep doing this.

Anyway, I've just realised that Danny, I don't know which part of this email story is the dream and which part is not the dream.

Because you start by saying, I wanted to share a dream I had last night.

And then you go on to say, I work in the office of a German company that makes windows.

And then I get a phone call and blah, blah, blah.

And the story goes on.

Listeners, you're going to hear it.

The story goes on.

But Danny, I don't know which part of this is the dream.

Is it true that you work for the German company that makes windows and that you live not far from the French border?

I think that's true because of the way you end the email.

So which part of this is the dream and which part of it is not?

I assume that the dream is the phone call.

But maybe the dream is that you work for a German company making wooden windows.

Maybe that's part of the dream as well.

Or maybe just the phone call is part of the dream.

I'm not sure.

But anyway, I liked the email.

Sorry for the interruption.

Let's continue.

Ooh.

I work in the office of a German company that makes wooden windows.

Since our company is not far from the French border, we also have a lot of French customers.

I'm in charge of the French ones because, lucky me, I speak French.

So I get a phone call from a man who asks me if I also speak English.

He tells me this is all in Danny's dream, by the way, right?

He tells me he's calling on behalf of an elderly English couple, Mr and Mrs Twig, who want to replace the windows in their house and would like to get a quote from our company.

He explains that they don't speak either German or French.

There was something strange, though.

The man's voice sounded very familiar, suspiciously familiar.

That voice you're sure you've heard somewhere, maybe while washing dishes or taking a walk with headphones on.

Before I could ask who he was, he suddenly passed the phone to an elderly gentleman.

Mr Twig was very polite, a little deaf and extremely determined to give me every single detail about his windows, including the emotional history of each one.

It took ages.

I tried to stay patient and professional, but deep inside my brain a little voice kept shouting.

I know that voice.

That first guy was Luke Thompson.

I'm sure of it.

Finally, after what felt like a three-hour documentary about Windows, I managed to ask my final question.

Mr Twig, may I ask you something?

The man I spoke to earlier, was he by any chance Luke Thompson?

Mr Twig casually replied, ''Oh, yes, that's right.

Do you know him?''

''Know him?

Know him?

I've listened to his voice more than I've listened to my own family.''

''Could I just speak to him again for a moment?''

I asked, trying to sound calm and not like a crazed fangirl student human.

Mr Twig called out, ''Luke, someone wants you on the phone.''

My heart started pounding.

This was it.

After years of listening to Luke's English podcast, I was finally going to speak to the legend himself.

My mind raced.

Should I thank him?

Tell him how helpful his podcast is?

Confess, I fell asleep once while listening to him and dreamt he was explaining conditionals in my kitchen.

I waited for him to come back and waited and waited and then the line went dead.

Thanks for reading, Luke.

Best wishes from Strasbourg, France, and the Black Forest, Germany, from Danny.

So that's a bizarre dream.

I must have wormed my way into your brain Danny, to the extent that you're even dreaming about me, which I consider to be a sign of success.

That's a great achievement as far as I'm concerned.

And this brings new meaning to the idea of dreaming in English, doesn't it, listeners?

But I am interested in your dreams, everybody.

I am interested in your dreams.

Show me your dreams.

Show me your mind.

For a while, I've been thinking about doing an episode about dreams.

I think they are fascinating.

There was a time in my life when I used to write down my dreams.

So maybe I could get that old diary out and read out some of those weird dreams that I wrote down in the past.

But I'd love to hear about your dreams as well.

Have you had any weird or interesting dreams?

Tell me about them.

Send me your dreams.

LukeTeacher at Hotmail.com.

They don't have to be about English or about, you know, the podcast.

I just think dreams are fascinating.

And I'd love to read some interesting dreams and read them out on the podcast and maybe speculate on what they actually mean.

If they actually mean anything.

I don't know.

Do they?

Do dreams mean anything?

Freud thought they did.

Sigmund Freud thought they were very symbolic.

Little windows into the subconscious.

Right.

It's time for me to go out, have my lunch and have my band practice.

And then I'll come back and we will continue this epic rambling journey at Christmas time.

OK, listeners.

All right.

So, through the magic of podcasting I'm now going to, we're going to jump ahead by about two or three hours when I click my fingers.

And here we go in five, four, three, two, one.

And we're back.

And it's now about two and a half hours later.

And if you're watching the video version of this, you'll see that the camera has changed.

That's because while I was out, my phone, which I normally use as a webcam, died.

The battery died.

So that's the end of that.

So I'm using my...

The inbuilt camera on my MacBook, which is not quite as good as the camera on my phone, but that's okay.

And here we are again.

So, okay, two and a half hours later.

Actually, I better get the fire going again, hadn't I?

Okay, let's just get the fire burning once more.

Nice and cosy, isn't it?

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Yes, I should drink some more water.

It is time.

So band practice was good.

We're getting ready for the ambassador's Christmas party again.

Just like last year, we're doing the party for the British ambassador to France at the ambassador's residence in this big fancy room with a high ceiling and there's a Steinway piano in there and everything.

We're going to be playing there next week.

So we're practising and we've got a few Christmas songs in our set list.

We are doing Merry Christmas, Everyone by Slade, classic British Christmas rock pop rock song.

But also we've added a couple of others to the set list.

We're doing.

All I Want for Christmas is You by Mariah Carey, which is obviously a huge classic Christmas number.

And as well as that, we're doing Last Christmas by Wham.

So we were playing those and lots of other songs.

So that's good.

And our guitarist, his back is absolutely fine.

I think the last time I talked about band practice, I said that our guitarist injured his back.

But thankfully, he's much better now.

So we are ready to rock the Ambassador's Residence next Friday.

Okay, so back to the episode.

How are you doing?

You're OK?

Yes.

Let's keep going.

I told you it would be a mega ramble and it is.

Remember, there's a quiz at the end.

Any idea what bits of vocab are going to come up in that quiz?

We will see.

So let's keep going.

We'll get there.

We'll get there eventually.

So the next thing.

The next thing here in my notes is some responses to recent episodes.

I wanted to just give my responses to episodes that I've published since the last Rambling episode.

So there's quite a lot of them.

I hope you've been enjoying my recent episodes, as I always do.

I'd like to give some responses to episodes I've published since the last Rambling episode, which was quite a while ago now, in the summer.

And I'd like to share a few listener comments as well, which I can expand on in various ways.

So first of all, there was episode 946 called Technology in Everyday Life, parts one and two.

The top comment on part one on YouTube from Konstantin.

It goes like this.

Forty years ago, the only technology for learning English I'd use was a paper dictionary and an old cassette player.

Nowadays, we have all imaginable amenities.

That's not quite the right word, Constantine.

And I'll go through that in a moment.

Nowadays, we have all imaginable amenities for learning and talented teachers at our disposal.

If only we had time to use them all.

Thanks, Luke.

Yes, time is maybe the biggest sort of, what's the word for it, commodity that we need these days.

But I wanted to correct that statement.

Word amenities.

It's not exactly the right word.

I would say resources.

So resources for learning.

So things like podcasts and YouTube videos.

These are resources for learning.

The word amenities suggest features that provide comfort or convenience to a physical place.

For example, like a building or a neighbourhood.

So things that provide convenience or comfort for something like a gym or a pool or a park.

In fact, a gym, a pool or a park, these are all amenities.

A gym would be an amenity for a building, a pool also an amenity at a hotel or something, and a park would be an amenity for a town.

So things that make something more comfortable or convenient.

Amenities are like facilities, and I'll go into that word as well in a minute.

Amenities are like facilities, but facilities are more practical things that allow a place or business to function.

Right?

But amenities are like side benefits that make something more convenient or comfortable and perhaps are part of a service provided to customers.

So I'm explaining the differences between resources, facilities and amenities.

So Constantine here in his comments is referring to learning tools, materials and technologies that we can use to learn.

So things like apps, videos, online courses, podcasts.

These are fundamental inputs used to achieve the goal of learning, making resources the correct term.

So resources here correctly refers to the materials needed for the task, like digital dictionaries videos, interactive software or the tools that enable the productive activity, in this case learning.

So, here's the basic difference between the three.

So, a resource then is something consumed or needed as input, like materials, capital, labour.

Right.

An amenity is something that provides comfort, enjoyment or enhances enhances desirability.

So for a hotel that would be like a spa or a swimming pool or things like that, things that make something more comfortable and enjoyable.

OK.

Like, for example, at a language school.

Amenities would be things like a comfortable reading area with nice comfortable chairs.

That would be an amenity, I would say.

A facility, though, is a specific place, building or structure built to serve a particular purpose.

It's much more practical rather than convenient and comfortable.

These are like practical physical things which have been built to help you do something.

Here's a quiz for you.

Right.

Here's a quiz before the final quiz.

But this is just a quiz about resources, amenities or facilities.

So are these things I'm about to mention, are they resources?

Are they amenities or facilities?

A resource, an amenity or a facility?

Crude oil.

Oil which is pulled out of the ground.

Crude oil.

That precious commodity that makes the world go round.

And anyway, crude oil, that is a resource.

OK, it's used to make all sorts of other things.

It's used to make petrol and fuel.

So crude oil is definitely a resource.

A shared rooftop garden in an apartment building.

Is that a facility or is that an amenity?

It's not entirely simple to see the difference between the two, but is it something that makes things more convenient and comfortable?

Then it's an amenity, I would say.

A library building on a university campus.

Right.

Is that a facility or an amenity?

I think surely it's more than just something that's convenient and comfortable.

This is a very important thing, that a very important building that adds practical value to the university.

So that must be a facility.

How about the labour or skills of a carpenter?

The labour or skills of a carpenter like the the, the the ability of a carpenter to make things from wood.

This is what resource amenity facility.

That's that's a resource, something that can be used to make something.

Right.

So a company might employ a carpenter and their skills are used as a resource.

High speed Wi-Fi in a coffee shop, high speed Internet in a coffee shop.

That would probably be an amenity.

Right.

Just makes the experience of customers in the coffee shop more convenient and comfortable.

A water treatment plant, a place where water is cleaned and recycled.

That would be a facility, right?

Because it's not like a thing that provides a comfortable, convenient service, is it?

It's a thing that's vital for production.

In this case, water, clean water production.

So crude oil resource, shared rooftop garden is an amenity.

It enhances the enjoyment of life.

The answers are on the PDF, by the way.

Sometimes there's overlap.

It's useful to note that facilities often contain amenities.

So, for example, a library.

It would be a facility for the university, but it might contain amenities like coffee making area or something like that.

Yes.

Another one, facility, amenity, or resource.

Video lecture on YouTube, that is a resource.

I mean, I'm not going to go through the rest of these, but you can check them out on the PDF if you want to.

But anyway, I just wanted to make the distinction between an amenity, a facility and a resource, because those are quite similar words, but I can understand how they would cause problems for learners.

Let's move on to the next episode, which was 948 workplace role plays, in which I've tried to persuade chat GPT to put its head into a crushing machine and to sell me an owl.

If you remember, this was popular and I do plan to do more of those sorts of things.

Ideally, I would do it with another human.

I mean, doing role plays because I don't want to over rely on AI as I think it might be evil.

I'm not sure it might be evil.

I'm not the only one who thinks this, right?

There's that underlying feeling, isn't there?

Every time that we use artificial intelligence chat, GPT and all those things, there is this underlying sense of like this is really convenient.

But there's just a nagging sense that it might be evil.

Maybe it's going to take over the world.

I read a report.

I read an article.

I saw a video that suggests that it might be. destroy all humans one day somehow.

But anyway, workplace role plays, a comment.

Francesco Melli 7208, the 7208th Francesco Melli in the world said could you do another one for more daily living interactions like the one at the supermarket?

For example, dealing on the phone with an internet service provider or mobile carrier, council services, or about bills.

Yes, absolutely.

I think it's a really good idea.

I would love to do more role play situations on Luke's English podcast.

I plan to do that.

So you can expect more of that sort of thing.

I think it's very useful as a way of introducing practical language.

I wanted to do a vocab review from the workplace scenarios, and that's something I may come back to.

But certainly more role plays either on my own, with a bot or with another human.

I think is a really good idea.

And something you can do as well to practice your English.

Another comment about this one was from Hyunhee on LEP Premium, who said I really enjoy these kinds of episodes, especially in hospitality.

It's fun to hear useful English expressions with a bit of humour.

It would be great to even make this into a whole series covering cafes markets, restaurants and travel, including some awkward or tricky situations that might happen there.

And my response to that is yes, there will be more and in different contexts.

The next episode was number 949 called The C1 Grammar Test That Wasn't Really C1.

I'm not sure that's the actual title of the episode.

I think it was called Let's Take a C1 Grammar Test.

But it was about the C1 grammar test that wasn't really C1.

Yes.

Right.

So I didn't make it clear, by the way, when I did that episode, that I thought the test and website that I used were a bit of a scam.

I mentioned this later in a more recent episode.

I did a response to this with a proper C1 test in another episode.

But yes, F.E.

Chen said, I guess on YouTube said this video absolutely made my day, not because of the grammar itself, but because every time you said I didn't take a screenshot, I burst out laughing.

Because, if you remember, I had to take screenshots of every question in the quiz so I could go back through them.

And I kept forgetting to take screenshots and it was really annoying.

But apparently it made Effie laugh out loud.

So that's nice.

Episode 950 was called the chat... What was it called?

The flatmate from Japan returns.

And it was a chat with my old flatmate, Peter.

Now, the lack of video version for this episode meant that the episode flopped on YouTube.

Also, the thumbnail...

The YouTube thumbnail probably wasn't quite as compelling or interesting to look at.

And as a result, the video flopped on YouTube.

I mean, it wasn't really a success on YouTube compared to my other videos anyway.

I mean, you know it still did all right, but not as well as I want my videos to do these days, compared to the average views that my videos get.

Thumbnails are all important on YouTube.

Makes a huge difference.

And also if someone clicks on the episode and they see that there's no video version, often people will just unclick, if that's possible, and then go and do something watch something else on YouTube that is attracting their attention.

And as a result, the algorithm decides that the episode is not worth promoting.

And then that's that.

So the lack of video version meant that the episode flopped on YouTube.

Thumbnails are all important.

But audio listeners, hello.

Audio listeners enjoyed this episode as much as any other episode, I think, because it made no difference to you that there was no video, which is, you know, a wonderful thing about audio land.

I got a comment from Bernard um, a top commenter this year on the website, and bernard on my website said hi luke, i had to look at the list of films by the coen brothers.

So in that episode, if you remember, i talked to peter about our favorite coen brothers films.

We talked about the big lebowski and we talked about what else?

What else did we talk about?

No country for old men and a few others.

I had to look at the list of films by the Coen brothers to discover that some of them seemed very familiar to me.

Until now, I hadn't grouped these titles together under these filmmakers.

Overall, it's been great to follow your conversation and now I'm richer for the experiences shared by you, you eyewitnesses from different parts of the world.

The beauty of these casual conversations is the dynamic way in which the conversation develops, and you have to follow the thread of the conversation.

Bernard, this kind of goes back to what I was saying earlier about rambling episodes, which is where I think they are perhaps better for learning English, because there's a natural sense of a flow from one thing to the other and a sense of a person's train of thought which probably maps your own thinking.

I'm sure there's something in this theory that the way that someone's brain works when you're listening, which involves, for example, predicting what is going to come next, reacting to what's being said.

A lot of it's about predicting what's coming, and the way what is said now makes you think about the next thing that you try to express.

I'm sure that listening to something that someone is making up on the spot is much easier and much more uh, compelling and um, rich for your english, than listening to something that's been written and rewritten.

I know this is ironic because i wrote all of this but, as i said before, i did try and write it in the same sort of stream of consciousness way that i would normally just say these episodes anyway, similar with a conversation like this one, where i just talked to peter and we just followed the conversation wherever it went naturally um, and so yeah, that's the beauty of these, These casual conversation, says Bernard, and he continues.

It was good that Peter occasionally chimed in his allusions to the example sentences, which made the dialogue even more lively.

Yes.

Well, Peter is a stand up comedian and one of the sort of techniques in stand-up comedy is the callback.

That's where you make a reference to a joke you made previously and, for some reason, the audience remembering a funny moment that already happened.

This callback is somehow satisfying and funny and Peter did that quite a lot during the conversation because he talks about learning Malay and using a textbook and some strange example sentences in the textbook, including a A case of an old man who was nearly dead and a person who had been a hostage, who'd been kidnapped and his legs had been bound together.

If you remember.

So strange examples.

And Peter kept managing to find ways to bring references to those things into our conversation.

So yeah, this is.

You know.

That's the advantage of speaking to someone who does stand-up is that they are aware of these little tricks that will be entertaining.

Uh, so thank you both, says bernard, and thank you bernard, for your comments.

Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts um.

Breaking news everyone.

Breaking news this.

Just in a moment of silence, please a moment of silence everyone, Because one of my premium subscribers has just cancelled.

Yes, it's a sad moment.

One of my premium subscribers has just cancelled their subscription.

Because I receive email notifications when subscribers cancel.

Did you know this?

Whenever a premium subscriber cancels and ends their subscription, I actually get an email saying I also get an email whenever anyone signs up.

So new subscriptions, I get an email and cancellations, I get an email.

So my email inbox is like a battleground and my day is an absolute rollercoaster of emotions, where I go through the highs and lows of new subscriptions and cancellations all in one day.

It really is a rollercoaster.

And when someone's unsubscribes or cancels, there's a space on the cancellation form where, where people cancelling can explain their reasons.

Usually this is left blank.

People just don't write anything.

But sometimes people write their reason.

And the thing that really makes me feel relieved so I get the email blah blah blah has cancelled their premium subscription.

And I go, ah, I'm going to feel bad.

And then I'm like thinking, oh, God, what's the reason?

And I check and there's no reason.

And I just sort of have to assume, I don't know what.

I just try not to think about it.

But the thing that relieves me it makes me go ah, that's all right is when someone writes something like this.

They write thank you Luke, or thank you so much, but I just don't have time at the moment, but thank you for the episodes something similar like that

That really puts my mind at rest.

So anyone unsubscribing or cancelling if you just leave a nice message like that to say really enjoyed it, but I just don't have the time, or something like that, then that would make me feel better.

But the one I just got...

The one I just got went like this.

It said, hi, Luke Thompson, redacted at gmail.com.

So I've redacted the person's name.

Redacted at gmailcom has cancelled their subscription to Luke's English podcast premium channel on the LEP premium plan.

Their subscription will remain active until the end of their billing period on the 4th of December at 718pm.

Reason for cancelling subscription.

The reason is some other reason.

So these are the options that people get, and this person has clicked some other reason.

Then additional comments.

And this is where the person can write more comments.

And in this case, the person wrote this.

And if this is you, I don't mean anything bad by this, right?

In fact, this is kind of funny, if anything.

So the additional comment was this.

I've been a subscriber for quite a few years and I think I've got the most out of it that is possible.

I think I've got the most out of it that is possible.

And my response to that is I didn't write this to him, but him or her.

But my response is well, you think you got the most out of out of the subscription.

That is possible.

And you never once asked for my nude photos, not even once.

And you say that you've got the most out of it that's possible.

But, you know, there might have been more that you could have got from it.

But no, you cancelled.

You cancelled anyway.

That's a pity, but it is what it is.

Just a reminder listeners, if you would like to resubscribe, if you cancel and you'd like to resubscribe, that 20 discount is still available for you and available until the end of January 2026.

I'm just saying.

I don't mean to suggest that you will definitely get nude photos from me, but, you know...

Sometimes there's more to gain from my premium subscription that you might realise.

But no, there will be no nude photos, don't worry.

That would just be awful, wouldn't it?

Oh, God.

But I suppose it's an option for me.

One day, if everything else fails, there's always OnlyFans, isn't there?

Moving on to episode 951, Bits and Bobs 4, questions of English, listener comments.

So this one included lots of different things.

One of those things was about a lepster who listens while harvesting olives in an olive field, which I thought was an interesting context.

And I asked you for other comments about this.

I wanted you to tell me what you were doing while listening.

So thank you very much for letting me know what you do while listening to my episodes.

I find this fascinating.

Here is a rundown of some of those things.

So here's a kind of rundown of some of the things that people do while they listen to Luke's English podcast.

So one of them is doing chemistry experiments in a laboratory.

And if that is you, then please do stay focused so that you don't make a mistake while doing an experiment and accidentally become a superhero.

With good podcast listening skills, what kind of superhero would you become?

You accidentally expose yourself to gamma radiation while listening to Luke's English podcast.

And he became English speaker man with the ability to speak English really well.

Whenever you are angry.

You get angry, you become very talkative in English.

Just very good at English, but only when you're shouting.

Also, walking the dog in a lovely coastal location.

Joseph, Joseph, Joseph.

That's the listener.

That's not the dog.

That's the listener.

Sent me a photo of his dog, Tarkus, enjoying a lovely sunset.

I'm assuming it's a sunset, not a sunrise.

Lovely.

I don't know if the dog listens to the podcast as well.

But anyway, you can see a photo on the PDF.

Very nice.

Driving to a nearby town.

This is another listener.

This is Raquel.

Driving to a nearby town to lead a Batacuda group.

That's a kind of group drumming session.

And that's Carmen.

So Carmen is a drumming lepster, which...

Is great because I'm a drummer as well.

So other drummers out there, we're in like a special special group drumming Lepsters.

There are a few of them.

So I'm yes, I'm proud of you.

I'm a drummer, too.

I love to hear from other drummers.

And you can usually hear them coming from quite a long way, can't you drummers?

Because of course they're making so much noise hilarious.

Um, other common activities lepsters do while listening, in order of frequency.

So the first thing most common activity people do while listening is walking, running or hiking.

Walking, running or hiking.

So if that is you, let me give you some encouragement.

Ready?

Left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right.

Just keep going.

Excellent.

Second most popular thing to do while listening is chores and housework.

So cleaning, tidying general housework, which I think is the perfect way to get through these annoying tasks.

Listen to a podcast at the same time.

And that's the perfect way to get through the annoying tasks. not the perfect way to get through these long episodes oh it's a long episode i might as well clean up the house while i listen it'll help me get through the episode i was thinking the other way around it's the perfect way to get through those annoying tasks um you know i've got to do all this washing up i might as well listen to a podcast at the same time uh this is best if you have bluetooth headphones so that you don't get all tangled up with the cables um That's one of my favourite things.

I like cleaning up the kitchen while listening to my favourite podcasts.

Cooking and preparing meals.

Lots of people cook and get food ready while listening to the podcast.

If that is you, share your recipes with us.

We want your recipes.

Share your favourite recipes to prepare while listening to Luke's English podcast.

English food.

Yeah, of course.

Number four is commuting, so travelling to work basically, or travelling home from work by bus, by train, by metro, by bike.

If that is you and you're on a bus surrounded by strangers, try not to laugh when you're surrounded by all those other people, those miserable-looking people.

The fifth most popular thing is just to be at work, listening while at work.

Yeah, are you allowed to do that?

Just make sure that you pretend to do something productive while you get paid to listen to me.

And just like, yeah, what are you doing?

Oh, I'm just typing.

What are you typing?

I'm just typing a report, just an English report.

Okay, and why do you have your headphones in?

Oh, it just helps me concentrate.

I'm just listening to some ambient music.

Yes.

Really, what's that?

That's Luke's English podcast.

You're fired.

You know, be careful.

Number six exercising or working out like in the gym.

Again, let me encourage you just keep going.

Okay, keep going.

Don't stop pump it up, pump it up, let's get pumped.

This is where I have to do an Arnold Schwarzenegger impression, right?

Come on, you can, come on, come on.

It's been a while, hasn't it?

Since I did one of them.

I think the last time I did an Arnold Schwarzenegger impression on the podcast, someone commented and said can you stop doing an Arnold Schwarzenegger impression?

And I haven't done it since.

He's a very sensitive person.

But I will do it just to encourage that one person who's in the gym.

Come on, come on, you can, you can do it.

You can do it.

Come on.

Have I lost the ability to do it?

I don't know.

Did I ever have the ability?

Come on, you can do it.

No, maybe I've lost it.

Seven, shopping.

Listening while shopping.

If that is you, do you need milk?

Do you?

You don't know, do you?

You don't know if you need milk.

No idea how much milk you have in the fridge.

Number eight, falling asleep or relaxing.

Yes, a lot of people choose to listen to my episodes while they are falling asleep.

And I will take this as a compliment, although I could be offended at the idea that my precious words are used as a sleep aid.

But I will assume it is because I am so calming and relaxing that it helps to put you into a lovely calm, relaxing state.

Perfect for a good night's sleep.

Number nine, driving.

And if that is you, please do take care and do not miss your turning, which has happened in the past.

I got an email from someone once upon a time who said they were listening to the podcast.

It was an Amber and Paul episode and they were so engrossed and captivated and riveted and all those things that they missed their turning and ended up 40 kilometers away from where they should have been.

So make sure you pay attention while driving.

And please be safe.

Please be careful.

And don't tailgate.

No tailgating.

Lepsters don't tailgate.

No, you're far too respectful and thoughtful for that.

Creative hobbies is number 10.

Painting, drawing, craft.

I have had several gifts from Lepsters over the years who draw, paint, do embroidery.

Thank you very much.

I've got a painting on the wall here.

Someone sent me an embroidered picture.

Wonderful.

Thank you.

If you do artwork while listening, share your artwork and craft with us.

Just a photo would be fine.

Just share it on the website.

Travelling is another one.

In airports while sightseeing um, and listening at the same time.

And if you are in an airport, then keep your eyes peeled for me because you might see me.

Because airports are the number one place that i am recognized by lepsters.

It's the number one place that i get stopped by people who say are you luke from luke's english podcast?

Um, it's airports.

And in ancient roman coliseums as well, for some reason.

There was that time in Italy when I got stopped in the Colosseum and someone said excuse me, are you an English teacher?

And I said, yeah, I am.

Oh, I used to listen to your podcast.

I was like, what do you mean used to?

Number 12, stretching, doing yoga or relaxing activities.

If that is you, namaste.

Number 13, childcare, just while looking after children.

And if that's you, hang in there, okay?

Just hang in there.

It's going to be okay.

Your child will sleep eventually.

Why do we do this as parents?

I don't know.

We try to have children, right?

We try.

We say that to people.

It's like we're trying for a baby.

So we do try.

We try to have children.

We make so much effort to Prepare everything and then welcome them into our world.

And then we just want them to be asleep, don't we?

Why do we do this?

Number 14 is doing DIY.

Do it yourself.

So putting up shelves, doing practical things at home painting, doing repairs, building or gardening

And yes, DIY.

I love DIY.

How satisfying it is.

The smell of sawdust after you've been sawing wood and that lovely smell of fresh wood being drilled.

All the DIY tools and equipment.

Hammers and drills and saws and planes.

Yeah, just be careful.

Don't hit your thumb with a hammer, OK?

And if you do whack your thumb with a hammer, make sure you shout out in English.

OK, just have the presence of mind to shout out in English like oh Jeepers Creepers, or oh sugar, or flipping heck, or goodness gracious me.

Or the other more popular X rated swear words, if you prefer.

I did an episode about DIY years ago after I'd set up my room and I talked about how I did it.

And it was all of the vocab of DIY.

Search the archive if you want to listen to that.

Number 15, people listen in the bath or in the shower.

Yeah, that is a bit awkward, to be honest with you.

Not sure I really want to know more about that.

And number 16 is simply listening to me while doing absolutely nothing, simply lying on the sofa.

And please tell me a better way to spend your time than just lying on your back in a comfortable spot.

If there's a better way to spend your time, please tell me what it is.

Then there are the dedicated Lepsters who sit poised with a pen and paper, ready to write down words and phrases and other pearls of wisdom that might trip off my tongue.

And finally spare a thought for the listeners who curl up in bed while listening and then fall into a blissful and deep slumber and miss all the actual content.

So just spare a thought for those poor listeners who sleep through all of my content and don't get any of the benefits, because i don't believe in all this stuff about sleep learning.

I mean that's, that's bollocks, isn't it?

Isn't it?

Um, i don't know, maybe not.

Let me know if you, if you listen to my episodes when you're asleep, have you noticed an improvement in your english?

I mean, those people won't be able to reply because they're asleep.

Hey, wake up, wake up.

Yes you, what?

Can you remember anything that i've said?

No, of course you can't, because you were asleep anyway.

If you do something else, something different in an unusual location while you listen, please let us know in the comments section.

OK, but don't overshare.

Right.

OK, it's time to enter the comedy corner.

Comedy corner.

Here we go.

I should probably have a jingle for this, but I don't.

So that's that.

I've talked about having background music in the past.

Let's have a bit of music.

Come on.

I'll find something.

OK, I've got to pause the fire so I can raise the volume for the music in the comedy corner.

Here we go.

OK, I'm not going to play a lot of music here.

It's just at the beginning.

Welcome to the comedy corner.

Everybody.

I should say that this section where I just tell you a few jokes, this is shamelessly lifted, meaning stolen from Kermode and Mayo's laughter lift, which is a feature from the Kermode and Mayo.

What's it called now?

Kermode and Mayo's take, which is one of my favorite podcasts.

And they have a section called laughter lift where they tell jokes.

This is the Comedy Corner.

Welcome everybody to the Comedy Corner.

Hey, fun times.

Let me tell you a few jokes and then afterwards I'll explain them.

Okay, I've got six jokes for you.

Here we go.

Right, joke number one.

A friend got a PhD in the history of palindromes.

OK, a friend of mine got a PhD in the history of palindromes.

Do you know what a palindrome is?

I'll tell you in a minute.

But he got a PhD in the history of palindromes.

They now call him Dr. Awkward.

Right, you kind of need to see that one written down if you want to understand it.

Welcome to the comedy corner, everyone.

Number two, I saw a sign at a boot fair.

A boot fair, that's where people buy things out of the back of people's cars, right?

Or buy secondhand things.

I saw a sign at a boot fair.

It said, radio for sale, 50p.

Please note, volume stuck on full.

I thought, ooh, I can't turn that down.

Welcome to the Comedy Corner, everyone.

Number three.

I accidentally swallowed a whole box of Scrabble tiles during game night.

Right?

I accidentally swallowed a whole box of Scrabble tiles.

You know that game Scrabble?

Yeah, I ate them and swallowed them accidentally during game night.

I tell you what, the next time I go to the loo, it could spell disaster.

Mmm.

Number four.

There was a dawn raid by the police.

A dawn raid.

First thing in the morning, the police raided my apartment.

The policeman said to me, Luke, I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia.

You downloaded the entire Wikipedia.

I'm arresting you.

And I said, wait, I can explain everything.

Welcome back to the Comedy Corner.

Here we go.

Number five.

So I had a pre-operation meeting with the surgeon for a procedure.

So I was going to have an operation and I met the surgeon in advance.

And I said, I asked if I could administer my own general anaesthetic.

I said, can I administer my own general anaesthetic before the operation?

And she said, sure, knock yourself out.

OK, and finally, number six, I formed a band, right?

A band, a music band.

I formed a band.

The name of our band is 1023 Megabytes.

But we still haven't quite got a gig yet.

OK, right.

So there you go.

That's the cozy atmosphere of the of the lovely log fire is back.

As I explain these jokes, a friend got a PhD in the history of palindromes.

A palindrome is a word that reads the same back back and front. right?

Like the word, I don't know, Bob, right?

B-O-B, which is a person's name.

Backwards and forwards, it both says Bob.

That's a palindrome.

There are more complex palindromes than that.

I just can't think of any.

Anyway, a friend of mine got a PhD in the history of palindromes.

They now call him Dr. Awkward.

And if you look at it, Dr. Awkward is a palindrome.

D-R-A-W-K-W-A-R-D is spelled the same way both ways.

Dr. Awkward.

Yeah, because after you've done a PhD, people call you doctor, right?

But in this case, Dr. Awkward, because that is a palindrome.

Okay.

Number two.

I saw a sign at a boot fair, radio for sale, 50p.

Please note, volume stuck on full.

And I thought, oh, I can't turn that down.

So this is a double meaning of the expression turn something down.

In one sense, it means turn down the volume, reduce the volume.

Right.

Turn up the volume, make it louder.

Turn down the volume, make it quieter.

And the reason you can't turn that down is because the volume is stuck on full.

Right.

So I can't turn it down.

And the other meaning of I can't turn that down means I can't refuse that.

I can't refuse that.

The reason I can't refuse it is because it's a radio for just 50p.

Oh, I can't turn that down, meaning I can't refuse that.

That is a good joke because both meanings mean something.

The whole situation works in both directions.

Radio for sale, just 50p, but the volume is stuck on full.

Oh, I can't turn that down.

Meaning I can't refuse it because it's a good offer.

And also I literally can't turn down the volume because it's stuck.

Okay, that's a good one.

Number three.

I accidentally swallowed a whole box of Scrabble tiles during game night.

Scrabble is that game where you have lots of letters on little tiles and you have to try and make words with the tiles right.

And you get more points if they're more complicated words, with certain letters that score higher points.

But I swallowed...

So I ate them.

They went down into my stomach, all the tiles with the letters on it.

The next time I go to the loo, next time I go to the toilet, that means it could spell disaster.

So there's a double meaning of spell disaster.

In one sense, when we say it could spell disaster, that means there might be a disastrous outcome.

Right.

For example, I might have diarrhea or something else.

Like, for example, I drank lots of whiskey and then and then started an English lesson that could spell disaster.

Like teaching English drunk is never going to be a good idea.

It could be disastrous.

So drinking all that and then doing a lesson that could spell disaster.

Right.

But swallowing lots of Scrabble tiles and then going to the loo, that could spell disaster.

So the other meaning of spell disaster is literally the tiles when they come out.

When you go to the toilet, when you do your poo, the tiles come out and it could literally spell disaster.

OK, that's not a bad joke.

There was a dawn raid.

The policeman said, Luke, I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia.

I said, wait, I can explain everything.

So, again, a double meaning.

I can explain everything is what you say when someone is accusing you of doing something wrong.

But you can explain that.

There's a reason why I did this.

Okay, i can explain everything.

Like, for example, if you get caught, i don't know what, what could you be caught doing?

Um, i don't know something terrible.

Like you're, you're caught naked in a place that you shouldn't be and someone walks in on you like, what are you doing?

Ah, i can explain everything, really honestly.

There's a reason.

I can explain everything.

But also, if you had just downloaded the entire wikipedia And maybe read it all, then you would know everything and you would literally be able to explain everything, like to be able to explain the history of Turkey.

Or you'd be able to explain the chemical formula for for, for I don't know plant plant food.

You'd literally be able to explain everything because you just downloaded the entire Wikipedia.

I'm arresting you for downloading Wikipedia.

I can explain everything.

That's a good joke as well.

I had a pre-operation meeting with a surgeon for a procedure.

I asked if I could administer my own general anaesthetic.

She said, yeah, knock yourself out.

So we say knock yourself out when we say to someone, yeah, just...

Help yourself to something.

Do something for yourself.

For example, do you mind if I have some more orange juice?

Yeah, sure.

Knock yourself out.

Meaning serve yourself some orange juice.

Have as much as you want.

Yeah, sure.

Knock yourself out.

Do you mind if I use your Wi-Fi?

Sure.

Knock yourself out.

Do you mind if I administer my own general anaesthetic?

Sure, knock yourself out.

And to knock someone out is to make someone unconscious which, of course, is what general anaesthetic is.

It's a medicine that you take that makes you unconscious before you have an operation.

So saying to the surgeon, can I administer my own general anaesthetic?

And the surgeon goes, yeah, sure, knock yourself out.

You can see knock yourself out has got two meanings.

Is my voice going to survive this episode?

I don't know.

I feel like I'm losing my voice.

I really love this last joke.

I formed a band called 1023 Megabytes, but we haven't quite got a gig yet.

OK, so this is the double meaning of the word gig.

A gig in one sense is a gigabyte, which is 1024.

Is it 1024 megabytes makes a gigabyte?

Is that right?

So if you've got just one kill is it one kilobyte less or one megabyte less than a gigabyte then you haven't got a gig yet.

Right.

But also a gig is an informal word for a concert.

And if you're in a band, you need to get gigs.

Right.

You'd get a gig, meaning get a show where you play your music to an audience.

So we've got a gig next Friday.

I've got a gig next Friday at the British Ambassador's residence.

So that's a gig as well.

So the band is called 1023 Megabytes.

We haven't got a gig yet, meaning we haven't got to a gigabyte yet.

We need one more megabyte to get there and we haven't got a gig, meaning we haven't got any concerts yet.

OK, thank you for joining me here in Comedy Corner.

Let's move on now to talk about episode 952, which was called The Trip to Norway, plus a whole premium series that came after it.

There was a four part premium series that came after that.

So this is perhaps the most popular episode of the last few months, proving that people seem to enjoy these moments when I share experiences from my life.

And this is one of a long line of episodes about trips I've been on, including Vietnam Thailand Indonesia Japan, two series about California, a trip to New York and others.

You can check them all out in the archive.

So in the episode I talked about how I don't like beach holidays and I was exaggerating a bit for comic effect, to be honest.

I was saying stuff like...

You know, I don't understand the appeal of beach holidays.

And a lot of people agreed, except for the occasional Brazilian Lepster, who simply could not agree.

And I got one particular comment which unfortunately I can't find now, but it was very persuasively worded, with stuff about the pleasure of spending the day on the beach eating at a table with the sand under your feet, the sweet sea air infusing your skin, the long evenings with friends with an ice-cool beer in your hand, etc etc.

So that was very persuasive.

So if that was you, you know, very well done.

Nicely written comment.

Episode 953 was a game of Would You Rather with my daughter.

So many lovely responses to that one.

Yes, my daughter is great and I am very proud of her.

A comment from, I guess, a Chinese listener or Taiwanese listener.

If those things are different, let's not get into that right now.

Oh, dear.

Anyway, I can't read the name because it's written in characters that I can't read.

But the comment was this.

Time really flies.

I've listened to your podcast since before your daughter was born.

And now she grows up to host with you.

Amazing.

It is amazing, isn't it?

I remember when she was like a little, you know, a little newborn baby, like not even capable of doing anything um, having to be looked after 24 7, and now she sits next to me and she could basically host the podcast.

It's insane, isn't it?

It really is, um.

There was one question, if you remember, about whether you would rather be sent to prison for killing someone or or after being falsely accused of murder.

It was basically would you rather go to prison for a murder you did commit or a murder you didn't commit?

Remember that one?

I'll play that exchange.

Let me play that moment to you.

It's from about one hour into the episode.

I'll play it to you so you can remember.

So, next question.

Would you rather be imprisoned for a murder that you didn't commit or for a murder that you did commit?

Would you rather be imprisoned for a murder that you didn't commit or a murder that you did commit?

I'm actually going to throw the question back to you.

Would you rather be imprisoned, so put in prison, for a murder that you didn't commit?

So it's like, you'll go to jail for 25 years.

But I didn't do it.

Jail.

Or go to jail for 25 years.

Okay, I did it.

I murdered someone.

So which one?

Well, the second one, of course.

Sorry, what?

Murdered someone.

You want to murder someone?

No, I don't.

Ah.

Don't fiddle with the microphone.

I don't want to, but like you see, I don't want to, but like it's worse if you're going to prison.

Is it?

So you're thinking, if I'm going to prison, I might as well murder someone.

Well, yeah.

I'm going to prison anyway, you know, so free pass.

I'm going to spend 25 years to life in prison, so I might as well kill someone for it rather than go in there for nothing.

Yeah.

No, I don't agree.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because it's bad to do it.

Yeah, you forgot.

It's bad to murder someone.

Yeah.

Who would you murder?

It's like you're going to go to prison for 25 years.

Wait a minute.

Let me just murder someone first.

Who is it?

Who are you going to murder?

I'm going to murder...

One of the persons who are in prison.

One of the other prisoners?

No, they don't deserve that, do they?

They're already in prison.

I don't know if anyone deserves to be killed, to be honest.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't think so.

Listeners, you can send us your suggestions.

Actually, don't.

Don't, because that would be inappropriate, wouldn't it?

Send us your kill lists to luketeacher at hotmail.com.

Actually, yes.

Send us...

No, don't.

Don't.

I don't want that in my inbox.

It's going to look very weird.

Plus, I don't want to know who everyone wants to kill.

Okay, so that was an extract of that.

Now so would you rather be in prison for a murder you didn't commit or a murder that you did commit?

This sort of raised some feedback from my listeners who wanted to chime in to the debate.

So one listener pointed out right that if you went to prison but didn't kill someone, it means that the real killer is still loose and has not been punished for their crime.

And so society suffers, which I think is a very good point.

I can't remember who said that, but it's a very good point.

I was arguing that I would rather go to prison for a murder I didn't commit, because I don't want to commit murder.

So if it's a choice between, I mean, I'm going to prison anyway, so I'd rather not have killed someone.

But this person is saying well, if you go to prison and you're innocent, that means the real killer is free and loose.

I mean, this is a very good point.

But I would like to throw the question back to you, listeners.

What do you think?

Would you rather be imprisoned for a murder you didn't commit or for a murder that you did commit?

And please don't tell me who you would like to murder.

I'm not really interested.

A lot of people were saying that my daughter is funny and adorable.

This is true.

She's definitely funny.

Here, I'll give you a couple of examples.

The other day, we were talking about something profound.

I can't remember exactly what it was.

And I said to her, well, nothing lasts forever, you know.

I said, nothing lasts forever.

I was trying to be wise.

And she said, not true.

Some things last forever.

And I said, what?

And she said, microplastics.

You can't argue with that.

And just yesterday, we were talking about our time in Norway, especially catching the fish.

Here's that moment in case you need a reminder of the moment when my daughter and I caught a fish.

Here is that moment.

Then one day it was all very misty.

These clouds rolled over from the nearby valley.

They rolled over the top of the mountain and into our area.

And we found ourselves in this misty, mysterious place situation and my daughter and i went out on the lake anyway in the boat and it was all misty.

We couldn't see the edge of the lake, so it was very atmospheric and weird and we carried on fishing and finally we caught something.

My daughter was there with the net.

It was her job to land the fish.

So if i caught something i would have to try and bring it in and she would get it into the net.

That's called landing the fish.

So she was there with the net and I was casting and she was kind of going oh, we're never going to catch anything.

And then I said, oh, I've got something.

And I did.

I could feel it pulling the line and I reeled it in and I see it in the water.

And then, bam, there it was wriggling at the end of the line.

And my daughter lost it and she got all scared.

She's like that, giving me the net like, oh, you do it.

So I had to land the fish and of course i got the hook completely caught up in the net and it took me ages to remove the hook from the poor fish's mouth and then to remove it from the net, but we got it.

We brought this trout it was a lovely brown trout brought it home and that evening we ate it.

We fried it in butter and salt, which made me feel a little bit better about catching it and pulling it out of the water, And that's the only fish we caught the entire time.

Right.

So there's just a reminder of that moment that we caught a fish.

I was talking to her about this and I said to her, you know what?

We will always have that memory, you and me.

We will always have that memory of the day we caught the fish on the lake, surrounded by mist, in the mountains.

We will always have that memory.

You will remember that until the day you die.

And I was like really putting this point across.

And she said to me, wait, what was it again?

Right, so next episode was at number 954.

The Amber and Paul episode that didn't have a 20 minute introduction.

It was called Holiday Hell, blah, blah, blah.

Judy's Empathy on YouTube wrote to me.

She said, I've got a new jingle for you.

I thought this was cute.

Her new jingle is this.

Amber's got the sparkle shining like the sun.

Paul brings the laughter always on the run.

Luke's got the rhythm, cool and smooth.

Together they're the trio with the ultimate groove.

That's quite nice, isn't it?

Moving on.

Episode 955 was let's take a real C1 English test, which is where I went through a CAE Cambridge Advanced English Certificate use of English test and went through it.

People liked this.

It was it was a real test.

Some people requested more.

Some people asked for CPE.

That's the Certificate of Proficiency in English.

I will do that at some point and probably more CAE stuff.

But this isn't an exam prep podcast, but I will do some more stuff because it's revealing.

It's revealing.

You learn from it, but also it's it's revealing about what advanced English really is.

Episode 956 was a chat with my brother.

It was called Thompson Originals.

That was another one that had no video version and it flopped on YouTube relatively speaking, but did well in audio land.

I recorded, if you remember, I recorded the intro and outro of the episode in the toilet.

I was sitting on the toilet.

I mean, I had my pants on, but I was sitting on the toilet recording it in the toilet.

Yes, in a toilet and on a toilet.

The toilet is the name of the room and the thing that you sit on in the room in British English.

Anyway, I was sitting in the toilet because it was the quietest room in the flat on that particular occasion.

I had to record it at home in the evening.

So I was in the toilet and I got a couple of comments from listeners.

Camilla, I think, said, I missed James.

We'd like to listen to him more often.

OK, I will try and get James on the podcast more regularly.

OK. as a long, long-term contributor to the podcast.

Yes, I'm sure that long-term listeners might miss him.

An Ideal Rider said, honestly, I'm listening to your podcast from my toilet.

So this is.

I was recording in the toilet and this person was listening in the toilet, which was kind of funny.

And Molly Tai said, who still exists, tends to comment on YouTube these days.

Hello, Molly.

She said, you are so natural together, a great duo.

Thank you.

We do have a good sort of rapport with each other.

You know, i've known him since the day i was born, pretty much, and so we're quite close in age and very close, very similar wavelength and sense of humor.

Alin frost wrote this a real brother's love and friendship.

I envy you because i don't have any, any siblings.

I was waiting for the flushing sound at the end of your goodbye bye bye bye, bye anyway.

Thank you so very much.

And yes, this is true.

I missed a good joke there.

I could have ended the episode by flushing the toilet.

That would have been perfect.

So I'll have to remember if I ever do another episode in the toilet.

I think flushing the loo would be the perfect way to end the episode.

Ah, more breaking news.

This just in, listeners.

Do you remember the episode I did a while ago this year?

It was called The Abduction.

A funny short story about a Spanish guy called Jose who gets abducted by aliens and they make him an incredible English speaker and some weird things happen to him.

Do you remember that?

Popular one.

Now, if you were Spanish, how did you feel about that?

Because the character was Spanish, right?

How did you feel about that?

Was there anything wrong with it at all?

Did you feel that you were being ridiculed at all by the story?

I hope not.

But anyway, I just got this comment and I probably shouldn't give it too much attention or thought.

But it has bothered me for two reasons.

The first reason is that I'm concerned now that I was genuinely offensive to any Spanish listeners.

And if I was, I'm sorry.

Although, having said that, I didn't get any other responses, and the episode has had several hundred thousand views on YouTube alone,

But, you know, I didn't mean to be offensive to any Spanish people.

And secondly, actually, I feel that I wasn't offensive to Spanish people at all in the episode.

I consciously didn't make fun of Spanish learners of English at all, and that was in my mind when I made the episode.

I made a point of not actually picking on any specific common Spanish errors or even doing a dodgy Spanish accent, which I think would have been wrong.

Um, I think would have been wrong.

And so this has sort of pissed me off a bit, to be honest, because this comment is a bit negative.

I should probably ignore this kind of comment.

But I do also want to share something negative here, just so that episodes like this aren't too self-indulgent and like oh, everyone thinks I'm great.

I think it's also worth sometimes sharing some of the negativity that is sent in my direction.

Anyway, here is the comment, and I have redacted the commenter's name, by the way, because I don't want people finding the comment.

And if you do find the comment, just leave it.

But anyway, the comment went like this.

I'm from Spain, and I felt ridiculed by your story about Jose.

It's a shame that you've sunk so low as a teacher.

That was the bit that got me the most.

It's a shame that you've sunk so low.

If you sink...

If you sink so low, it means you kind of like get to a low level, meaning you're doing things that are really bad.

It's a shame that you've sunk so low as a teacher.

And this kind of triggered me and I replied.

I got no response.

My reply was this.

There was no intention.

Maybe this is a bit passive aggressive, my reply.

You can decide for yourself.

There was no intention whatsoever to ridicule spanish people with this story.

In fact, i think there was nothing in particular that was in the story that should be offensive to spanish people.

I didn't make fun of an accent or any errors.

In fact, i chose a spanish person for this story as i've always felt warm towards my spanish students and have a lot of spanish listeners.

All learners of English from every country struggle with the language, just as I struggle with French or Spanish.

I'm sorry that my story offended you, but this is not at all what I was attempting to achieve.

But yeah, that line, it's a shame you've sunk so low as a teacher.

Wow, that is a bit harsh.

But like I said in my comment, I don't think I was actually ridiculing Spanish people whatsoever.

I think you can.

You can check the entire story and you won't find any specific points of ridicule against Spanish people.

But anyway, if you are Spanish, how did you feel about that episode?

If it made you feel bad, then I sincerely apologise.

Again.

Some of you might add that I should ignore that sort of thing, but I do want to show that it's not all about flattery and ego boosting for me and that quite often a comment comes around like that which knocks me off my high horse and back to reality and maybe keeps me grounded or just makes me feel bad for a while.

Anyway, moving on to episode 957.

It was more questions of English and listener comments, in which I responded to a lot of comments from listeners, including one from a listener in Uzbekistan, if you remember.

And then I talked about Uzbekistan for a bit, which brings us to another email of the week.

I feel like I should have an email of the week jingle.

I've been rather lax with my jingles recently.

I used to have jingles for everything, but not so much anymore.

Anyway, here's the email of the week. from Gokhan.

I think that's how I say your name.

So Uzbekistan strikes again is the title of this one.

Hi, Luke.

In the October 13th episode, you asked about the weird things that happen to people while they're listening to you.

Well, here's mine.

I hadn't listened to your podcast in a long time, but I recently decided to start again.

Meanwhile, I'd just broken up with my girlfriend and my mind was a total mess.

She went to Uzbekistan for work.

So I randomly pick an episode to distract myself.

And what do you do?

You spend 15 to 20 minutes talking about...

Uzbekistan.

Thanks a lot, mate.

Way to poke the wound.

Greetings, Gokhan.

So, yeah, sorry, mate.

And I just did it again, didn't I?

I just talked about Uzbekistan again.

I'm very sorry.

I hope it hasn't sort of reopened the wound.

But, you know, as people say, there are plenty more fish in the sea.

So I hope that you have moved on, you've got over the loss, the breakup, and that you realise there are plenty more fish in the sea.

And I wanted to give you a reminder as well that Uzbekistan is double landlocked.

So it's probably best that your wife went there.

Because there are plenty more fish in the sea, but Uzbekistan is double landlocked.

So you've got nothing to worry about.

Do I need to explain that?

If I need to explain that, I mean that you can be sure that she is not in the sea.

Yeah, okay.

Do you know what plenty more fish in the sea means?

It just means there are lots of other people out there.

Lots of other girls out there.

Oh, I forgot to start the fire again.

Oh, it's a bit loud.

OK, I think you get it.

Moving on, the next episode was called a free sample of LEP Premium Series 71.

Some listeners became premium Lepsters after this.

So if that is you, then welcome.

And I just want to quote Obi-Wan Kenobi from Star Wars.

You've just taken your first step into a much larger world, he says, but in the voice of Obi-Wan Kenobi.

You've just taken your first step into a much larger world.

How would Alec Guinness say that?

How does Alec Guinness speak?

Luke, use the force, Luke.

He has, of course, he has that special, he's got like echo in his voice.

How do I get the echo to work?

Echo, echo, that's it.

Use the force, Luke.

Or use the force, lepsters.

You've just taken your first step into a much larger world.

That's one of the things that Obi-Wan Kenobi says to Luke Skywalker.

And it's true for you.

If you've just signed up to LEP Premium, you have just taken your first step into a much larger world.

Remember, LEP Premium will be with you always.

Until, of course, you cancel your subscription.

I hope you've been enjoying the premium episodes, in particular the recent series Revisiting Vocabulary from the Door in the Wall.

I hope you've enjoyed that.

Episode 959 was called How to Learn English with My Podcast.

We're getting closer to that vocab review all the time.

Yeah, How to Learn English with My Podcast.

Hey everyone.

It says here I made an effort in this one to get straight to the point and do no rambling.

I got a nice comment from Lynn.

It's always nice to know that your work is appreciated.

Not that it always seems like work.

But anyway, this was nice from Lynn 1882.

The 1882nd Lynn on YouTube.

She wrote this.

What really amazes me about your podcast is that you write down everything you're going to say beforehand and then you deliver it almost word for word during the recording.

Many episodes are over an hour long.

I can't imagine how much effort that takes.

I've never seen anyone do it quite like you.

How could someone write out everything they're going to say for such a long episode?

But I have to say it's incredibly helpful.

I really need to follow your podcast closely so I don't miss out on all the hard work you've put into it.

Thank you.

Well, thank you, Lynn.

That's very nice.

I don't know why I'm saying it so aggressively, but I am genuinely.

Thank you, Lynn.

It's very nice to get that message from you.

This just in more breaking news.

Laura, your Spotify-wrapped 6,087 minutes of LEP listening has been beaten.

Yes, because I got this message on Xbox.

Formerly Twitter from D. That's at Green Mellow Blue at English podcast.

Not quite up to my standards of two years ago, but you're still my top podcast for 2025.

Yay.

This is the second time I message you today about the Spotify wrapped thing.

And I swear I didn't know they were coming out today when I sent you the first one.

So Dee sent me a message previously in that day about something else relating to Spotify, and then discovered that LEP was their top podcast for the year, with a total

Are you ready?

Drumroll.

The number of minutes listened.

A grand total of 9709 minutes this year, placing Dee in the top 05 of LEP listeners on Spotify worldwide.

So, that is very impressive.

But listeners.

Can you beat Dee at green, mellow blue on xcom?

Can you beat that 9709 minutes this year?

Do share your spotify wrapped for 2025 and be the winner if you've got more minutes than that.

Only someone else in the top 05 percent of worldwide spotify listeners can beat 9709 minutes.

That is a lot.

Now, given that an episode is, on average, about 75 minutes long, let's say 9709 minutes is equivalent to about 129 complete episodes.

So that's about 129 episodes in the year that Dee listened to.

That's about two and a half episodes per week every week for a year.

Serious commitment there.

Well done to you.

And as you could see from two years ago, I think Dee was the top listener as well two years ago.

So this is a serious long term listener knee deep in episodes of Luke's English podcast.

I don't know what two years ago what the number of minutes was.

So, Dee, if you know, then let us know as well.

But yeah.

So, yeah, you might be able to beat 2.5 episodes per week, right?

You might think, well, I listen to more than two and a half episodes a week.

Yes, you might do.

But did you do that consistently week in, week out for 52 weeks this year?

If you did, then you might have got more.

But if you're not on Spotify, you might not know about it anyway.

Moving on, episode 960 was Fine Distinctions and Subtle Shades of Meaning with Eli Bernstein.

Now, this was quite long and quite complex, but I maintain that it is packed with interesting and insightful things and is well worth listening to again to get the full benefit, including differences between various similar words, insightful details about canadian english and eli's articulate way of speaking.

So do check that one out again if you have the time.

Here's the top comment on youtube for this episode from anag 8596 the 8596th anag on youtube, apparently.

Hello luke, i appreciate everything you do.

Oh thanks, it's very helpful to me.

Very helpful for me, i would say probably helpful to me.

Yeah, maybe i'm over.

I'm over 70.

And I suppose I'm the oldest listener.

Lepsters, do I have anyone older than 70?

I think I do.

I think I've had emails from people in their 80s before.

So if you're older than 70, let me know.

But anyway, this listener said, I'm over 70 and I suppose I'm the oldest listener.

I've been learning English for years.

It's my hobby.

I started when I was at university and uh now thanks to your podcasts i finally achieved the level that allows me to speak quite easily well done to you very happy for you recently i went to the netherlands and i found that my english became really good i found that my english had become really good right because otherwise it sounds like your english became really good when you were in the netherlands so i found that my english had become really good meaning before you went to the netherlands the netherlands Recently, I went to the Netherlands and I found that my English had become really good.

Excellent.

I'm really happy to hear that.

I could communicate with Dutch people without stress.

I could easily find suitable words while speaking.

And I know that it's thanks to your podcasts.

Yeah, you think?

If that's true, that's amazing.

I decided to continue listening to your perfect English I can find in your podcasts.

Thank you very much from Gdansk, Poland.

The warmest greetings to you, Luke.

You are great.

You are a great, wonderful teacher.

That's very nice.

You're welcome.

And yes, I am always happy to have such flattering things posted in a public forum for everyone to see. um thank you to all my guests for their contributions to making this podcast what it is including eli and emma and emma and everyone pete peter james just any everyone let's let's go to comedy corner again shall we here comes part two of comedy corner uh i've got to play the music again now haven't i here we go welcome back to comedy corner listeners Yep.

We're back.

We've somehow ended up back in a corner.

I've forced you into a corner.

I'm going to tell you some jokes.

I hope you don't find that too awkward.

I've got how many?

I've got about six more jokes.

Let's see if you can understand these.

You could consider this to be like a little test of your English as well as your sense of humor.

But if you don't get these, if you think there is nothing to be, if you think there's no funny thing about these, you're wrong, because they've all got some kind of double meaning involved.

So there's definitely a funny element to all of these jokes, and it's your job to try and find out what that is.

Okay, so let's get started.

And here we go.

As I try and stop the music.

How do I stop the music?

OK, here we go.

Just press this.

Right.

So joke number seven is this.

I took my partner to London Zoo.

And when we saw a sleeping tiger, I whispered, that one there, that one is a Himalayan tiger.

She asked how I knew.

And I said because Himalayan, right there not the best.

Uh, question eight.

Question eight joke eight what weighs more, a liter of water or a liter of butane what?

What weighs more?

What is heavier a liter of water or a liter of of butane?

Um well, it's a liter of water, because no matter how much water you have, butane will always be a lighter fluid Uh-huh.

Joke number nine.

Did you know that they are now able to splice the DNA of a cheetah into the DNA of a crab?

Yeah, they can combine the DNA of a cheetah into the DNA of a crab.

I'm telling you, that could go sideways fast.

Joke number 10.

So I asked Siri on my phone, I asked Siri, surely it's not going to rain today?

And she replied, yes, it is.

And don't call me Shirley.

Hold on.

The joke's not finished, right?

I asked Siri, surely it's not going to rain today?

And she said, yes, it is.

And don't call me Shirley.

That's when I realized I'd left my phone on airplane mode.

OK, that's got a pop culture reference there that you might not get.

Here's another one with a pop culture reference about the Beastie Boys.

Shout out to any Beastie Boys fans in my audience.

So MCA and Mike D from the Beastie Boys, MCA and Mike D are releasing a five part vinyl anthology.

I should probably say Ad-Rock and MCA to be fair.

Ad-Rock and Mike D, because MCA unfortunately is no longer with us, as any self-respecting Beastie Boys fan would know.

So Ad-Rock and Mike D are releasing a five-part vinyl anthology, a bit like the Beatles anthology.

Jesus, difficult to speak.

You can get parts A B, C and D for free, but you've got to fight for your right to part E.

Okay, and finally, number 12 a fossilized dinosaur fart has been discovered.

Yeah, it's a real blast from the past oh, okay.

Okay, welcome back to the comedy corner, everyone.

All right, how did you get on with those?

Did that make any sense to you?

Were you thinking, what is up with these terrible jokes?

These are dad jokes.

Or maybe you thought to yourself, yeah, I got them.

I got the jokes, but I didn't find them funny.

Or maybe you thought there was nothing funny about those.

They were just sentences.

No, you're wrong.

They weren't just sentences.

There was definitely double meanings in there, just like before.

I took my partner to London Zoo.

This is a terrible joke, I have to say.

I took my partner to London Zoo.

And when we saw a sleeping tiger, I whispered, that one is a Himalayan tiger.

From like the Himalayas, a Himalayan tiger.

She asked how I knew.

And I said, because look, Himalayan right there.

Himalayan.

Him-a-lay-an.

That means he is lying.

Himalayan tiger yeah himalayan, right there, sleeping tiger, himalayan.

Look, himalayan tiger.

Okay, that's not worth explaining anymore.

The frog is well and truly dead, isn't it?

Uh, what weighs more a liter of water or a liter of butane?

Butane is the fluid that you would get in a cigarette lighter right, the stuff that's inside of the fluid is butane.

Often is is butane.

It's a lighter fluid, Right?

So what's heavier?

Well, water is heavier because, no matter how much water you have, butane will always be a lighter fluid.

So in the sense that it's lighter than water, but it's lighter fluid because it's for cigarette lighters.

A lighter is a thing that you would use. to light a cigarette that's a lighter and the fluid you put in a lighter is called lighter fluid but the double meaning is that it's lighter fluid than water so what's heavier water or butane well water because no matter how much water you have butane will always be a lighter fluid okay number nine They're now able to splice or combine the DNA of a cheetah into the DNA of a crab.

I'm telling you, that could go sideways fast.

So if something could go sideways, it's a bit like saying that's a recipe for disaster, right?

Or that could spell disaster.

It could go sideways.

It could go pear-shaped.

It could go wrong, right?

It could be a disaster.

That could go sideways means that could be a disaster.

But also, it could go sideways fast because crabs go sideways and cheetahs are fast.

So if Combining the DNA of a crab and a cheetah, that could go sideways fast.

You can see the double meaning.

I asked Siri, I said, surely it's not going to rain today.

She replied, yes, it is.

And don't call me Shirley.

That's when I realized I'd left my phone on airplane mode.

So airplane is the joke thing there.

Airplane is a classic comedy movie from the 1970s, starring Leslie Nielsen, about an airplane disaster.

And one of the famous lines in it is you know, Leslie Nielsen says I want you to fly this plane and land it.

And the guy goes, surely you can't be serious.

And he goes, I am serious.

And don't call me surely.

So that's just the surely, S-U-R-E-L-Y.

And surely sound quite similar, especially in an American accent.

So surely it's not going to rain today.

Yes, it is.

And don't call me surely.

I have to play you that clip from Airplane now.

Okay.

So first of all, the air hostess is going to say to him excuse me, can you come to the cockpit?

And he says, the cockpit, what is it?

Meaning, what's the problem?

Why do I need to go to the cockpit?

But there's a double meaning to that too.

Can you come to the cockpit?

The cockpit, what is it?

And she says, well, it's the little room at the front of the plane where the pilots sit.

Yeah.

There's another one in the film as well, where Leslie Nielsen says we've got to get this woman to a hospital.

And the girl goes, a hospital?

What is it?

And he goes, it's a large building with a lot of patients, but that's not important right now.

Anyway, the film is full of jokes like this.

And surely you can't be serious.

I am serious.

And don't call me Shirley.

Bad accident?

Excuse me, sir.

There's been a little problem in the cockpit.

The cockpit?

What is it?

It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit.

That's not important right now.

You see, the first officer is ill, and the captain needs someone to help him with the radio.

Do you know anything about planes?

Well, I flew in the war, but that was years ago.

I wouldn't know anything about it.

Would you go up, please?

The stewardess said... Both pilots?

Can you fly this plane and land it?

Surely you can't be serious.

I am serious.

And don't call me Shirley.

Okay.

It's a classic moment in movie history.

So I left my phone on airplane mode.

Because the phone Siri made a joke from the movie Airplane.

All right.

The Beastie Boys won.

Ad-Rock and Mike D. Right.

One of the most famous Beastie Boys songs is you've got to fight for your right to party.

You've got to fight down, down for your right to party.

Right.

You've got to fight for your right to party.

But this is, you've got to fight for your right to part E.

So Mike D and Ad-Rock are releasing a five-part vinyl anthology.

You can get parts A, B, C, and D for free, but you've got to fight for your rights to part E. Okay.

And finally, a fossilized dinosaur fart has been discovered.

It's a real blast from the past.

I like that.

A blast from the past is just like a thing that you haven't seen for a long time.

Like, for example, I got an old Nintendo Game Boy.

Wow, this is a blast from the past.

Tetris, remember that?

That's a real blast from the past.

Like a sort of funny or amazing thing from the past that reminds you of the past.

Oh, Tetris, remember that?

Wow, what a blast from the past.

But also, a fart from a dinosaur is a blast from the past.

A blast could mean a fart, right?

A blast of air?

Yeah, okay.

Right.

Moving on.

That was Comedy Corner.

That's the end of that.

Moving on then to more recent episodes.

Emma from English and Hey Lady.

Two absolute legends of online English teaching united in one epic conversation in which we talked about world changing topics such as punching an old Toyota and singing in the shower.

Emma. wrote to me on YouTube.

Her comment got 153 likes.

She wrote to me, Ah, thank you, Luke.

I should probably do this in an Australian accent.

Ah, thank you, Luke.

I love this conversation so much.

I probably shouldn't do the accent.

You really have a knack for asking intriguing questions and pulling interesting stories out of people.

I hope your students enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed creating it with you.

That's nice, isn't it?

Lots of other very nice comments from people saying that Emma has made a genuine difference to their English over the years.

What a privilege we have as online English teachers to be able to help people with their English around the world.

That's good.

And then there was The Door in the Wall, 962.

As I write now, this is the most recent episode.

So when I wrote this, this was the most recent episode.

I've actually added more since then.

I'm going to cut that bit out then.

I said so much about the story, so there's not much more to add, but plenty of people wrote very profound things about the nature of dreams nostalgia, the search for childhood innocence and other themes, and some very touching comments.

I hope you enjoyed the premium series in which I told you the story again and explored a lot of vocabulary and detail and sort of converted the story into the opportunity to learn English.

Then there was Talking Therapy, Mental Health and Counselling with Emma Camara Ortega.

Very nice to have Emma on the podcast, as it always is when I have a friend on the show.

To be honest, she was nervous about doing it.

But I think it was great and I was very happy to talk about an important topic.

Here's the top comment for that episode on YouTube from Juan Manuel Fabres Briones.

And the name continues.

So he wrote this.

Mental health is such an important part of anyone's life that I can't thank you enough for bringing the topic to your podcast, as it is usual.

As usual, this comes in a very personal way.

It's your former colleague with a changing career story.

It's also remarkable how respectful you are about listening.

I mean, paying proper attention and then guiding the conversation.

Thank you, Juan Manuel, who is a conversations or interviews.

I mean, for me it's just more like that.

I feel like I have to really pay close attention to what the person I'm talking to is saying in order to make sure that the interview, the episode, goes well.

You know, I've got to...

Really pay close attention in order to ensure that there is a natural flow to the conversation and to be sure that I'm asking the right things.

So that requires like an immense amount of focus and concentration, which is actually a pleasure to be able to do.

It's very nice to be able to bring your focus down so narrowly on what someone else is saying and really focus and engage with them so closely.

It's great.

It's a very intense way to spend an hour or so.

Um, then there was the cozy rambling episode at home, which was part of a double episode with the walk and talk in monmartre, which was only on youtube.

Um, so this is the only one.

So no, this is the one.

This is the episode, the relaxing cozy rambling episode at home.

This is the one where i recorded the episode, lying on the floor, lying on the bed and hanging out of the window, and also peering through the peephole in our door to look at people fixing our neighbor's door and which got broken by burglars.

And I talked about the Louvre being robbed and a much more important robbery, our apartment, which happened earlier in the year.

And my wife's wedding ring was stolen, as well as all her other jewellery, including things inherited from her beloved grandmother.

Upsetting, but we're over it now, thankfully.

But I loved recording this one.

As much as I like doing episodes with video...

Doing audio only is particularly nice and relaxing, and it reminds me of the old days of the podcast, when it was always just audio, which is quite freeing for a podcaster like me.

A comment on the website from W.Y. who wrote, I got furious about the news of the burglar.

I cannot believe how you managed to talk about to tell the story not talk the story, but tell the story so calmly.

It is absolutely unacceptable and unfair.

I hope everything is back and the criminal is arrested.

So WY was not alone in expressing that sentiment.

So thank you very much for being thoughtful, everyone.

Most people.

No more people got in touch to tell me what they were doing while listening, which is always great.

Going back to what W.Y. said about the criminal being arrested, I don't think that's the case.

I think the person or people involved probably just got away with it completely because it was completely impossible to track them.

But we've learned our lesson, the lesson being.

Get an alarm, get fit an alarm at home and use it.

It will work as a deterrent, a preventative measure.

Then there was the walk and talk in Paris, the mission to Montmartre.

So considering the walk and talk in London earlier this year did very well.

And just on YouTube, it got about 700,000 views.

That's good.

So because of that, I had high hopes for this one.

A similar thing in Paris.

Not the first one I've done in Paris, but still.

I put a lot of work into it and incorporated the mission objectives, which I thought made it a lot more interesting.

But it has languished this week on YouTube, reaching only number seven in my list of most recent 10 videos in terms of performance, which is a lot lower than I hoped.

I thought it would be number one, like the London one.

So I might consider that a failure. to be honest.

But the comments of people who've seen it have been lovely, and that's nice.

And I am really happy with it myself, so never mind, right?

It doesn't matter if it sort of doesn't get as many views as I hoped it would.

Anyway, I consider it to be a new high in terms of quality in my video making and I will aim to do more things like this in the future, including ones in London when I get the chance and which I think people prefer right in London.

And they're also...

There are added possibilities in in the UK when I consider doing challenges such as talking to people to achieve different objectives.

There is a lot of.

There's a lot of potential for communication based challenges in walk and talk videos.

I spoke to Michael from the Level Up English podcast about this when I was on his show.

Comment from Alamina. on YouTube.

Dear teacher, thank you so much for taking me on your mission in Montmartre.

It was a pleasure walking around the streets of Paris with you and listening to the curious details about that lovely city.

Now I'm considering visiting Paris and Montmartre in particular.

One thing, can you please stop criticizing your French?

Your French is better than mine, which I can't speak at all.

I appreciate all the hard work you're doing for learners of English.

Yes, I should stop beating myself up about my French.

There's no point to it.

I know full well, as you've heard me say so many times on the podcast, that there's no point in doing that.

So it's certainly no replacement for working on my French.

But you know, sometimes you feel like criticising your French is some sort of what a replacement for actually working on it, you know, acknowledging that it's not as good as you want it to be, but it it doesn't help anything.

So you're absolutely right, i should not criticize myself for my french, uh.

Next episode is the kit bag.

At the time of writing and recording this, the Kit Bag short story episode has not been published, so I have no idea what you think of it.

But short stories are usually popular, so hopefully it went down well with everyone.

There have also been all sorts of premium episodes as well recently, and to get the full experience, you need to be a premium subscriber too.

But anyway...

We are nearly, very nearly at the end of the episode and the vocabulary quiz.

This is turning out to be potentially a three hour episode.

The fire is still going really well.

It's lovely and cosy here.

But first, before we get to the end, here is another obligatory Hollywood style action movie screenplay, which I feel is kind of like something I like to do in these episodes sometimes.

And this is still one of my hobbies making chat GPT, create Hollywood action movie screenplays about my life.

For this one, I inputted everything from this podcast episode so far.

So everything I've written, most of the things I've written, I inputted it into chat GPT and asked it to write an action movie screenplay based on the content of the episode, which I think is definitely the best use of its time and processing power.

And then I made certain adjustments to add a little bit of humour.

So, are you ready?

Here we go.

This is very stupid, by the way.

This is my Hollywood action movie screenplay.

Imagine the tone of this.

It's like Christopher Nolan meets Michael Bay... meets every trailer voiceover from 2006...

It's called Operation Ramble Storm.

And Operation Ramble Storm.

I can't do that voice because my throat is too wrecked.

Operation Ramble Storm.

The tagline is, when the world loses the plot, one man must ramble it back to sense.

Which is meaningless, isn't it?

When the world loses the plot, one man must ramble it back to sense.

Somehow, through rambling on the podcast, I'm going to save the world.

You know, I've got 48 hours or whatever it is.

So, fade in.

This is the first shot of the movie.

External.

Outdoors.

Paris.

Nighttime.

A brooding sky.

So the sky is dark and atmospheric.

Thunder rumbles with a U. The Eiffel Tower flickers.

The light on the Eiffel Tower flickers ominously.

A voiceover. says this, in a world where clarity is mandatory.

One man refused to get to the point.

Then we have internal in Luke Thompson's podcasting room in here at night.

Shadows cut across a cluttered table, microphones, cable, cables, a mug that says ramble responsibly, which is not a mug I actually own, but it could be. luke thompson 40s british school teacher energy with action hero eyes sits before the microphone haunted focused dangerous he hits record luke whispering this isn't rambling sorry cut sorry take two okay sorry luke whispering this isn't rumbling this is rambling with an a Then a digital waveform spikes.

Suddenly, the door explodes in.

A tactical assault team floods the room, if that is possible in a tiny room like this.

A SWAT team, or TWAT team as I like to call them, bursts into the room, led by Agent Carter in in his 50s american.

He's got a granite solid jaw and loads of teeth, like you know the way, americans have got just this, like 50 teeth.

This is agent carter.

Luke thompson, you've been rambling for too long.

Luke smiles defiantly.

Story of my life, jesus cheesy, isn't it?

Gunmen advance into the room.

Luke grabs his microphone arm like a nunchuck, sweeping it across the room, knocking soldiers out with shockingly accurate grammar based blows.

I don't know how that's possible.

I'm aiming for the grammar centers.

Pow, pow, pow.

That was tense. says Luke.

But my skills were present perfect.

Yeah, I made up that joke, okay?

That's my joke, not ChatGPT.

I don't know if I should be proud to admit that or not, but anyway.

Act 1, the emails of doom.

Internal Interpol headquarters, that's the international police, in the war room.

Do they have a war room at Interpol?

I don't know.

A giant screen shows Olga's email from the episode.

Agents pace up and down anxiously.

Director Rousseau, the head of Interpol.

She's French, she's elegant and she's deadly.

Last week was pretty awesome.

But the tense inconsistency, it's catastrophic.

I don't know what that means.

Anyway, Agent Carter says, ChatGPT contradicted itself twice.

Two different tenses, two different explanations.

We can't let this happen again.

If this spreads, linguistic chaos will erupt.

Someone drops a coffee in the background.

Pshh.

Rousseau says, and I'm not going to do the French accent.

She says, there's only one man who can stabilize the timeline of English grammar.

She presses a button.

The camera zooms in on Luke.

It's absolute bollocks, isn't it?

This this screenplay.

I think that we can be sure that Hollywood is safe for the moment from the ravages of AI Although, to be fair, a lot of Hollywood movies are similarly shite, aren't they?

I think so.

Act two, The Ramble Initiative.

External, rooftop, Paris at night time.

Luke stands at the edge of a skyscraper, wind whipping his coat.

He holds a USB drive.

Luke in voiceover.

All my life I've been accused of rambling, but I turned my weakness into a weapon.

And then...

Helicopter blades rumble with a U. Carter over a loudspeaker.

Luke, hand over the ramble drive.

Come on, do the right thing.

Luke looks down, looks up, smiles, and then turns.

He leaps off the building and free falls, landing perfectly on a passing bateau mouche.

That's a tourist boat on the river.

Tourists scream.

Luke adjusts his tie.

Okay, I never wear a tie, but anyway.

It seemed like the appropriate thing to do when you've just jumped off a building and landed on a boat.

Act three, the dream call.

Internal, German window factory, daytime.

Machines hiss, sparks fly as windows get made.

Danny, 30s, heroic office worker, holds a ringing phone.

On the other end, Mr Twig, 80s, polite British, and behind him, a shadowy figure.

Mr Twig, young lady, I must tell you the emotional history of each window.

Hours pass on a ticking clock.

Danny sweats like she's defusing a bomb.

Finally, Danny, that voice, the first man, was it Luke Thompson?

No.

The shadow turns, reveals Luke.

Battle scarred, exhausted.

Luke into a phone.

We don't have much time.

Suddenly, the line goes dead.

Explosions shake the building.

The windows shatter ironically.

This is typical chat GPT bullshit, isn't it?

The number of times I've asked it to write a story for me and it just ends up writing something that just doesn't really make any sense at all.

But it's quite good fun.

We're near the end of this.

Act four, the comments uprising, external Norwegian fjord, daytime, a villain appears.

This is the algorithm, an AI entity, glowing, smug, American spelling and punctuation habits.

It must be stopped.

The algorithm, certainly.

The voice of the algorithm is going to be this kind of dispassionate voice from the films.

I have replaced all human effort with perfectly written comments.

Luke stands alone on a cliff edge, armed only with a microphone and righteous indignation.

Luke, you shouldn't rely on AI for everything.

If you do, you'd never develop real human skills.

Then the algorithm cocks its head to one side, you know, like the way evil alien robots do in movies.

Your podcast is... inefficient, too long, too many tangents.

Our audience metrics indicate your rumbling is not profitable.

Luke says, it's rambling, not rumbling.

He charges.

They clash in a spectacular fight.

There's a moment where one of them slides backwards on their knees.

You know where that happens in superhero films.

Grammar rules flying like throwing stars.

That makes no sense.

Cleft sentences, elided morphemes, all the most violent sounding terms in linguistics and language teaching fronting backshift elision intrusion assimilation fricatives plosives, agglutinative languages, case collapse, derivational suffixes, strong and weak verb forms, stress patterns slashing aspiration devoicing gemination, fortition and lenition.

Luke is pushed to the edge.

The algorithm, your interruption, your introduction, I mean, sorry.

Your introduction was 20 minutes long.

Luke smiles proudly.

And now it's going to save the world.

I don't know how.

He unleashes his ultimate attack the mega ramble, a nine-hour monologue about amenities versus facilities versus resources.

The algorithm overloads.

No more distinctions.

I can't compute.

It explodes.

Act five, the final mission.

This is like when you're in the cinema watching a film that you really don't enjoy and you're like, can it just finish please?

External, beach, sunset.

Luke sits with his daughter, who is wise beyond her years.

Daughter, some things last forever, daddy.

Luke, what, like microplastics?

Luke and his daughter smile and laugh at each other.

Yes.

How do you spell laugh?

L-A-U-G-H.

That's it.

A communicator beeps.

Beep, beep, beep, beep.

It's Russo on voiceover.

Luke, we need you again.

It's Uzbekistan.

It's double landlocked.

Luke stands heroic.

Luke, then I guess I'll need to ramble my way there.

He walks out into the sunset, rather irresponsibly leaving his daughter alone on a beach.

Russo says, no, no, you don't need to walk.

There are flights every few hours.

You just fly there.

It's much more convenient.

Luke Luke Luke, are you there?

Fade out the end.

And then it says on the screen ramble origins coming soon.

And then there's a post-credit scene.

Like you get in marvel movies in a toilet somewhere.

Luke's brother james, closes the lid of the toilet and he says you forgot to do the flush joke again.

Cut to black.

Finally listeners, we made it to the vocab quiz.

Oh yes finally, as promised at the start, can you remember that far back into your life?

Here's a quick quiz.

Quick yeah, to see if you were paying attention during the episode.

All these and there are 24 of them are words and phrases which came up during the episode at some point.

Answers are given below, plus a full vocabulary list too.

Will i do all of these?

We will see.

So, question number one what could you say to encourage someone to stay with you, keep listening and not give up?

For example, if you with me, nearly gave you the answer there.

If you with me, everything will make sense soon.

Similarly, you can say to keep doing something like learning English is difficult, but if you with it, it gets better.

So it's stick.

If you stick with me, if you stick with it, Everything will make sense soon.

How do you describe something that continues for the entire duration of a specific time period?

For example, there will be new episodes the holiday period.

There'll be new episodes the holiday period.

That would be what?

There'll be new episodes throughout the holiday period.

Question three what phrase can you use to get someone to imagine a scenario, possibility or future outcome?

It's sort of emphatic.

OK, of how much progress you could make in six months.

Just of how much progress.

Well, that's not too difficult.

That's just think of how much progress you could make in six months.

Question number four.

Which phrase describes a specialised or distinctive group of abilities someone has?

She brings a that nobody else has.

You know, I'm a professional.

I do this for a living.

I have a yes, of course, it's a particular set of skills.

Number five, what expression means controlling or restraining something that is becoming excessive?

I dealt with this previously in any premium.

He's trying to His spending habits.

I think I said something like I'll try not to make.

I'll try and keep this episode, Keep it in check.

Trying to keep your spending habits in check.

I'm going to try and keep the length of this episode in check.

I've failed.

Number six.

What do you say when you want someone to avoid digressions and focus immediately on the essential idea?

Let me...

I don't actually know.

Is it let me stick to the let me get straight to the point?

It's that, isn't it?

Let me get straight to the point.

What point?

Number seven.

How do you express that?

How do you express that something is the central purpose or reason for something?

That's that's the point.

What's the missing word?

That's the point.

That's why we're doing it.

That's the whole point.

Number eight what phrase describes being criticized for speaking too long without getting to the point?

He was of during the meeting.

I have been of.

Of course, it's rambling.

I have been of rambling.

I've been accused of rambling.

He was accused of rambling during the meeting.

Which adjective describes something with no clear plan, purpose or direction?

Direction is the word.

The discussion became completely by the end.

So with no direction, it's directionless.

Directionless.

What verb phrase means moving around without a clear destination?

We spent the afternoon...

So it's a phrasal verb, wandering around.

We spent the afternoon wandering around the old part of town rambling through the old part of town, you might say.

Eleven, which term describes speaking or writing in an unfiltered flow of thoughts, a stream of stream?

Of what stream of consciousness?

Uh 12, what phrase means so many times that it's impossible to count.

I've reminded you times not to do that.

I've reminded you countless times.

Number 13, how do you describe skills or behaviour that may not be fully reliable or trustworthy?

You can question them.

His cooking skills are pretty... Question...

Not very reliable, not trustworthy.

His skills are quite questionable.

Questionable skills.

He has questionable cooking skills, meaning they're not very reliable.

What phrase describes an explanation that is completely secure, solid and logically flawless?

We needed a... before presenting their results.

I think it's watertight, isn't it?

Could it be watertight?

A watertight answer.

Was that about ChatGPT not always giving watertight answers?

That's like really reliable, solid.

It won't let any water through, but it just means it's safe and solid and reliable and flawless.

A watertight answer.

I don't actually remember saying that.

Did I say that?

Apparently I did.

Okay, it doesn't always give you a watertight answer.

That's ChatGPT.

Okay.

Right, where's the quiz?

15.

What phrase refers to an obvious sign that reveals the truth about something?

For example, something that reveals that this person is from Liverpool.

His accent was a... that he was from Liverpool.

His accent was a dead giveaway.

That revealed he was from Liverpool.

Number 16.

How do you warn someone not to depend too heavily on something?

Like me saying you shouldn't use chat GPT too much.

You shouldn't... Too much.

You shouldn't... It.

You shouldn't... You shouldn't rely on it too much.

What phrase means or which phrase means publicly challenging or criticizing someone's behavior.

She him for being dishonest.

She called him, called him out, publicly challenged him, criticized him.

I'm going to make it through to the end.

18.

What phrase means assessing or evaluating something to see how good it is?

The interview really... Her skills... The interview really put her skills to the test.

The interview put her skills to the test.

I put ChatGPT's skills to the test to see if he could write jokes.

Number 19.

What expression means making someone feel emotional pain by bringing up a sensitive topic?

Like, for example, Uzbekistan again and again and again.

Mentioning his ex-girlfriend really...

Poked the... Ow!

Ow!

Poked the wound.

Number 20.

What classic idiom reassures someone that their romantic options are not limited to one person?

Don't worry.

There are... In the...

There are plenty more fish in the sea, of course.

21.

What phrase describes when something performs badly or fails commercially, especially online or in or in entertainment?

Like an episode of my podcast that doesn't get much traction on YouTube?

The video completely.

No, it's not fucked up.

The video completely flopped on YouTube.

22.

What expression means following or understanding the flow of a conversational story?

I was trying to.

Is it follow the flow?

I think it is.

It's just follow the flow of the answer was in the question.

I think it's follow the flow, isn't it?

Number 22.

Follow the thread.

Of course.

Follow the thread of the conversation.

Number 23 what expression means openly talking, openly taking or copying something from somewhere else, like the jokes which I took from Kermode and Mayo's Laughter Lift?

The idea was shamelessly from another show.

It was shamelessly lifted from another show.

And finally number 24.

What do you say when you successfully avoid digressions and focus immediately on the main idea?

I tried to get and avoid any rambling.

That was in a certain episode.

I tried to get straight to the point.

And look, that's it.

Well done everyone.

We made it through to the end.

That's the end of the episode.

It's almost dark outside.

I've got to go now.

So do you.

I will let you get back to your normal life, but I will just say well done for sticking with me all the way through in this mega rambling episode.

It's not the longest episode of Luke's English podcast I've ever made.

I've done ones that were over three hours in the past, but it's definitely up there as a super duper long episode.

So well done for listening all the way through.

Give yourself a good slap on the back.

Think of all those thousands of words that have entered your mind.

If you can beat 9000 and whatever minutes of listening on Spotify this year, let me know, because you deserve some sort of prize of some kind.

Otherwise, Merry Christmas to you.

Even if you don't celebrate Christmas.

I'll just say happy holidays, as they say in America.

Uh, but uh, season's greetings.

All the best for you at the holiday period.

As i said at the beginning, there will be episodes throughout the holiday period.

Um, you're going to get a couple of episodes with guests, two more episodes in december and then there'll be the the new year episode in january and and beyond.

Okay, lep premium i think you're going to get one more episode before january and then there'll be a new premium series about something.

Thank you so much for listening.

Thank you so much for being part of my audience.

We are a wonderful world of English learners.

OK, it is a wonderful community.

And I look forward to speaking to you again in the next episode.

Leave your comments, your thoughts in the comment section of this episode.

And I'll speak to you again soon.

Look at this wonderful fire that is still going.

I haven't had to add a single log to this fire.

And it's kept going for about three hours.

Incredible, isn't it?

All right, then.

Nice one.

Have a lovely rest of the morning, afternoon, evening or night.

And I will speak to you again on the podcast.

But for now, it's just time to say goodbye.

Bye.

Thanks for listening to Luke's English Podcast.

You will be directly supporting my work and making this whole podcast project possible.

For more information about Luke's English Podcast Premium, go to teacherlukecouk slash premium info.

[The Rambling Before Christmas: A Festive Special]-[The Ramble Before Christmas 🎄 [966] Listen & Learn English with Luke]

📋 Summary

The Ramble Before Christmas: A Festive Special

The Philosophy of Rambling

Spotify Wrapped and Listener Milestones

The Role of AI in Language Learning

Listener Interaction and Comedy Corner

Community and Future Outlook

🎯Key Sentences

📝Key Phrases

📖 Transcript

[The Rambling Before Christmas: A Festive Special]-[The Ramble Before Christmas 🎄 [966] Listen & Learn English with Luke]

📋 Summary

The Ramble Before Christmas: A Festive Special

The Philosophy of Rambling

Spotify Wrapped and Listener Milestones

The Role of AI in Language Learning

Listener Interaction and Comedy Corner

Community and Future Outlook

Deep Learning with ListenLeap

🎯Key Sentences

📝Key Phrases

📖 Transcript

ListenLeap Brings You Into Real Context Learning