Welcome back to Story Pirates Summer.
Did you know that every Monday this summer, Creator Club members have gotten an extra brand new story just for them?
Well, today we decided to open up the Monday episode for everyone so you can hear what you're missing with a brand new story called The Gum.
And if you'd like new stories every Monday in August, it's not too late to join Creator Club by visiting storypirates .com slash creator club or by subscribing right in Apple Podcasts or Spotify.
A brand new story, and we're throwing in another Roll Call Live with Lee and Peter coming up right after a few words for the grown -ups.
I'm very different from everybody.
everybody. Confusion is the steps before curiosity.
Okay, that's a really funny idea.
We have to send that in.
I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling.
I believe all the things in my story.
Human beings are just able to create.
The Story Pirates. welcome back to the story pirates podcast today's brand new story is about two things that should never go together that's right i'm talking about gum and dogs here's the author to introduce it hi my name is katherine i'm eight years old and i live in nebraska and this is my story the gum It was a dark and stormy night No, Henry, it is a dark and stormy night Right, thanks, Mark I can't believe I messed up the tense there Oh, good, Henry It's really raining cats and dogs out here Cats and dogs?
Nice joke, Henry Oh, I didn't even realize I was making one Heh!
Well what are you gonna do?
I'm a dog, not a rider.
Yeah, I guess you're - Ah!!
I nearly stepped on this piece of gum here.
Good thing I didn't.
Gum is hard to get out.
Oh, look! There's an earthworm on the sidewalk over there!
Stay here, boy! I'm gonna go check it out.
So this is gum, huh?
Smells interesting.
I've always wanted to try it, but Mark says it's not for dogs.
Ah, heck. One piece can't hurt.
hey henry i'm back i got bored with the worm what did you do while i was looking away nothing well all right come on let's go inside and get ready for bed perfect once i'm in my doggy bed i can chew this gum all night what's that boy nothing to bed it's tomorrow close henry but i think you mean it's today huh oh right it's today there you go okay it's time to get up and Henry, are you chewing gum?
What? I mean, yes, I went to sleep with it in my mouth last night, but wouldn't it have just fallen out?
Or maybe I would have swallowed it while I slept?
I'll spit it out right now.
Mark, it sucked to my tongue.
What are we going to do?
Let's see if Mom and Dad know what to do.
Mom? Dad? Mark? Henry?
Stop running in the house.
Take those zoomies outside.
No zoomies in the house, hen.
Mom, dad, Henry has gum stuck on his tongue.
Gum? I know. I saw some on the ground and just had to try it.
I'm sorry. No need to panic.
Let me just grab my tweezers out of my purse and try to pry it off.
Oh. And there. At least we got a tiny piece off.
Maybe we should go to the vet?
I hate the vet, but it's worth it.
Let's go! Well, Henry, I've never seen anything like this.
We've tried everything to remove that gum, and it's just not budging.
Is there anything else you could try, Doc?
Yeah, I'm thinking I'll try something pretty straightforward and not too severe.
What is it? Cut your tongue off and do surgery.
What? Now wait, there is another better option.
What do we do with that one?
We could do dangerous experiments which maybe won't end up so good.
What? Actually, that's not a better option.
I don't know why I said that.
But what are you going to do?
I'm a vet, not a writer.
If we do surgery, he will be fine.
What do you think, boy?
This is your decision.
Let's do surgery. Phew!
Oh, um, I mean, cool.
Sorry, the dangerous experiments just involve so much paperwork.
Anyway, to surgery!
The surgery was a success!
Yay! There's no more gum on his tongue?
Oh, uh, actually, we won't know that until we take the bandages off.
Then why did you say that it was a success?
I'm not really sure.
Let's take a look. Let me just undo the bandages and...
Aha! See for yourselves!
His tongue still has the gum!
I sound ridiculous with this gum on my tongue!
I can't go on like this!
Wait a minute! That gives me an idea!
What is it? You'll see!
Follow me! Welcome to the news.
Our top story, a dog with gum stuck on its mouth?
You heard that right.
We go now live to the Sycamore Dog Park for an exclusive interview with Henry the Dog.
Thanks, Bill. And good evening to your audience.
Hello, I am Henry Dog, and I have gum stuck to my tongue.
If you think you can help, I'll be here at the Sycamore Dog Park until 9 p .m. Thank you, and good luck, Henry.
Viewers at home, stick with us for more updates.
Ha! Great joke. Stick with us?
Like stick of gum? Oh, right.
I guess it was a joke.
I didn't even realize I was making it.
But what are you going to do?
I'm a news anchor, not a lady who makes up jokes.
Stay tuned for updates.
So I guess we just wait here and see if anyone was watching who might be able to help you.
Whoa, it's a fire truck, a police car, and an ambulance.
I wonder what's up.
Henry, it's us, Nebraska's finest first responders.
We're here to help you, boy.
Thanks a million. Don't worry, we'll take care of this in no time.
Here we go. Well, it's been 10 hours.
And despite the full efforts of the fire department, police and EMTs, that gum is still on Henry's tongue.
I'm so sorry to burst your bubble.
Burst your bubble? That's a good joke.
Oh, I guess it is. I didn't realize I was making a joke.
But what are you going to do?
I'm a firefighter. Anyway, best of luck to you.
let's go i guess that's it i'm just going to have to live with this gum in my mouth forever not if i have anything to say about it huh who are you i'm detective bill a gum shoe that's a great joke thanks i'm a detective and a writer listen i know how to solve this problem all you need to do is retrace your steps How will that?
Good luck. Wait, where are you going?
Sorry, I'm late for a thing.
Bye. Retrace our steps.
I guess we go back to the vet?
Go back even further than that.
How far? From the beginning.
You couldn't have just told us that from over here?
What? I said... Oh, Hank, drop it.
Let's go. Are we close to where you found the gum?
I was just over on the corner when I ate it off the sidewalk.
I'm not sure how coming back here is going to help.
Yeah, it's not like it's suddenly going to come out if I spit like this.
Hey, it worked! Hooray!
Congrats! Detective Bill, how did you know that retracing our steps would solve the case?
I didn't. And I have a feeling that that will be a mystery for years.
Who will figure it out?
Will you? What? Anyway, I'm just glad to have my happy ending.
Well, I suppose it's like they say, every dog has his day.
Great joke! Thank you.
I wrote that. The end.
We'll be right back after a few words for the grown -ups.
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And now it's time for Story Pirate's Roll Call.
welcome back to story pirates roll call where we take stories written by kids and we read them and we talk about them because they're incredible and inspiring and moving peter how about you read this first one for us today lee okay this first story comes to us from an eight -year -old from california named grayson and grayson's story is called the podcast podcast oh how appropriate hosts.
Welcome to the podcast podcast. This is where we ask random people to make the episode for us, but it must be a new podcast. Our special guest today is Bob Linden Crops.
Bob, I'm very happy to be here.
And here's my recording video.
This is Bob's podcast. And this is where I show you all my money.
So here is my gold because I only have gold.
hey look crows crows take shiny stuff right and they took it oh well i'll go get it back 30 hours later well i never got my gold back back to the studio do you have my gold because it's in your hands is the host uh that's the end of the podcast Bob.
Hey! 24 hours earlier.
Host. Ooh, golden crow's nest. The end.
Wow. Okay, so my biggest question is, was it just a coincidence that Bob was on the podcast today?
It just happened to be the day after the host steals all his money, the host has him on his show.
It's got to be a coincidence Because why would the host Know anything about Bob He found the money in a crow's nest Although, if it's not a coincidence This implies that while he's hosting He's holding all of Bob's money in his hand Well, not until they cut to video I think when they cut to video He started counting the money Just, you know, out of habit So while they're watching the video Bob's like, let me count all that gold That I just found yesterday That's right Because the podcast host, don't forget get crucially is very lazy does not want to create the podcast episodes for themselves oh
yeah for themselves just wants to have guests on that make the podcast for them but it must be a new podcast although yeah and to support your argument it says this is where we ask random people right to make the episode for us and it must be a new podcast right this is a coincidence can i also just say, we've talked about this before, but the single most popular name that kids love to write stories about is Bob.
Bob's a perfect name.
It sounds like a little pop sound.
But Grayson chose Bob, but not just Bob, but you have full name, Bob Lyndon Crops.
BLC, Bob Lyndon Crops.
Nice to meet you. Bob Lyndon Crops.
How the heck are you?
Bob Crops. Bob Crops.
Bob Crops. I'm the CEO of Bob's Crops and Crop Tops.
Be Lyndon Crops. bobell crops any way you crop it it's perfect i know um also grayson just really giving it to the podcasts here oh yeah podcasts are boring they're lazy the hosts themselves they're just looking for a content anywhere they can get it this is uh a real amazing takedown of podcasts but as a podcaster i also feel seen yeah all right let's get on to our next yeah lee will you read our next story i'd love to this is by adi evren and taryn from north carolina and it's called the foods we eat um nom dot com this is in verse the foods we eat give us a try a cake a tart or even a pie.
Can't determine the food?
Don't start to cry.
The foods we eat? Please don't ask us why.
Thefoodsweeatomnom .com.
It's all that and a bag of chips.
Positively the bomb.
If you want to use it, just ask your mom.
Thefoodsweeatomnom .com.
Can't read or see the label?
Take a scan with your phone if you are able.
Omnom .com. It's no fable.
Oh dear, don't scan that.
That's just a table.
French, Italian, or Korean cuisine or maybe something on a tire of an old limousine we'll identify it all if you know what i mean don't make a fuss no need for a scene oh no what have you done dude you scanned something that wasn't food what did you scan it's to become quite crude the not food might now start to brood you scan the table well pick up a make sure to alert to avoid alerting your wife that table now a cake will ruin your life eat it quick to dodge any imminent strife eat it fast or it might explode quick now or it will start to corrode hurry soon or you'll become a different mode
because if you don't you will self -implode the foods we eat give us a try a cake a tart or even a pie can't determine the food don't start to cry the foods we eat please don't ask us why um I am going to ask you why Addie, Everett, and Taryn.
Wow. A lot to unpack here.
I can't get over the scanning.
Yes. Scanning the table.
You know what I thought of when I heard that scanning the table?
You know how now you go to restaurants and there's a QR code on the table.
Yes, that's exactly what they're talking about, I think.
Okay. And in this case, I think they just were trying to scan the QR code, but they scanned the table.
I need to re -read these two kapas one more time.
You scanned the table.
Well, pick up a knife.
wife make sure to avoid alerting your wife that table now a cake it will ruin your life eat it quick to dodge any imminent strife that's the incredible story just right there yeah that's really good it it actually starts in a very sort of like food glorious food place yeah you know and you think that it's just going to be like here are the things we ate we love to eat them they're delicious blah blah blah blah blah but watch out for the cake and can i also just say you know, we worked on the cat in the hat podcast, so we've done a lot of Dr. Seuss.
We've worked in meter, and it is not as easy as it seems. And these guys have done a great job.
All right. Incredible work, Addy, Everett, and Taryn.
We love it. August wrote this last story.
Peter, would you read it for us?
Yes. From August, a seven -year -old from Virginia, here is the mutant cheeseburger.
More food. Once upon a time, there was a peaceful village and a bakery.
They sold cheeseburgers.
The mayor said to make living cheeseburgers, and they did.
They made three. The first two were perfect.
The last was evil, and it ate the customer.
The seller was shocked, and he ate the cheeseburger.
The end. Wow. Whoa.
It is a classic. we were so focused on whether we could we didn't stop to think of whether we should and we flew too close to the sun yeah because we made two perfect cheeseburgers and then we think we can do no wrong life finds a way you know what i'm thinking about when i read this story so the evil cheeseburger eats a customer right yeah and then the seller to solve the problem eats the cheeseburger.
But you know what that means?
The customer's inside of the seller's body.
Yeah. Wow. That's upsetting.
No more upsetting than the fact that many things that we eat, eat things.
I'm just thinking about the size of a person.
Sure. Could you eat an entire person?
I don't think so. Yeah.
I mean, sometimes I'll look at like a burrito and it's so big and And I'm like, how could that fit inside me?
You know, like, I wish I almost...
Like, if I had, like, a door that you could open and just put the big cheeseburger inside there, it would probably, like, ruin your insides.
It would be, like, too big.
It would be bigger than any one of your internal organs.
And yet, we can eat an entire cheeseburger if we choose.
And, you know, you might have a little bit of a little pudger.
A little rumbly in the tumbly.
Just for a few hours.
worse and then next thing you know you're fine no one ever knew that you put something that's the size of like two bricks into your body i would love to see like an mri or an x -ray of like of my stomach immediately after eating a too big burrito just to see like can i identify the whole burrito in there how fast is it breaking down uh well have you ever chewed up a bunch of burrito and then spit it on your plate no well let's agree to do this okay all right sounds like a date I guess we have lunch all planned out.
Two burritos, please.
Thank you very much. Well, August, thank you so much for inspiring such inspiring conversation.
And to read all of today's Roll Call stories, just head to storypirates .com.
And remember, you can watch an even longer version of Roll Call on the Story Pirates YouTube page with help from your grown -ups.
Now it's time for you to write us a story because summertime is a great time to write stories.
Grown -ups can submit stories at storypirates .com And remember, we respond to every single story we receive.
That's it for today's episode.
Thanks for listening.
And a big thanks to today's author, Catherine.
We'll be back later in the week with another brand new episode.
Until then, stay creative and stay kind.
Bye! The Story Pirates Podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios.
Executive Produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka This episode was produced by Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller, and Lee Overtree Recording, Sound Design, and Mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City Theme Song by Bobby Lord Roll Call Theme by Andrew Barbato Musical Scoring by Jack Mitchell Episode Artwork by Camilla Franklin The Gum was adapted by Megan O 'Neill and features performances by Sarah Morgan Ashey, Mark David Christensen, Brandon Zirko, Lindsay Ford, Peter McNerney, Megan O 'Neill, and Tony Tony Rodriguez.
Today's episode was so good, I'm practically gumfounded.
Um, I'm firing myself.
