As we close out this year, if you're anything like me, you're naturally thinking about what's next.
What do we want to focus on?
What truly matters to us?
And what should our priorities be?
But the truth is life asks us about our priorities all year long.
Maybe someone at work asks what you're hoping to focus on next year, or a friend notices you've started making different choices lately and asks what changed.
Or you need to explain why you turned down a promotion, why you're spending less time on social media or why you've stopped saying yes to every request.
Here's what makes all of this hard.
We're constantly weighing competing values.
In other words, we're choosing between two things that matter to us.
Should you prioritize career advancement or work-life balance?
Productivity or rest?
Being available to everyone or protecting your own boundaries?
Achieving more or being more present with the people you love?
We get these messages from everywhere and they're often contradictory, which means there's information fatigue all over the place.
We're exhausted by too many messages from wellness culture, career advice, family opinions and endless social media posts telling you what you should prioritize.
So when you want to cut through the noise, to get clear on what matters despite all those conflicting messages, and then explain what's actually true for you, and do that in english, you might hear yourself saying something generic like oh well, it's important to me too, or i care about, i care about spending time with my family, but none of that really captures the depth of what you mean or why something matters to you.
So today we're going to change that.
You're going to get the language you need to talk about your priorities and what you value, not just when you're making a big change in your life, but anytime someone asks What matters to you or what are you focused on.
These are conversations that happen at work with friends and with family all year long.
So by the end of this lesson, you'll have 16 practical phrases to clearly communicate your priorities and your values in English course.
The first step is to simply name what matters to you most, and these phrases will help you start that conversation clearly and directly.
The first one is what matters most to me right now is this phrase starter helps you identify your top priority, the one that's most important to you at this moment in your life.
For example, you might say what matters to me the most right now is spending quality time with my family.
This phrase works well when someone asks about your priorities directly or when you're explaining a recent decision.
And I want you to notice those words right now, because they show that you understand that your priorities can shift over time.
What matters most today might be different next year.
And now here are a few more examples of how we might use this in a real context.
In your career.
You might say what matters most to me right now is finding work that feels meaningful.
Or in health, you might say what matters most to me right now is getting enough sleep.
And in your English you might say what matters most to me right now is building my English speaking confidence.
And now here's phrase number two, I'm focused on prioritizing.
This phrase shows that you're actively giving attention and energy to something specific.
For example, I'm focused on prioritizing rest over consistent productivity.
This phrase is particularly useful When you're making a conscious change in how you spend your time or energy.
It shows intention and action.
You're not just thinking about it, you're doing it.
And now phrase number three, my top priority has become.
Use this particular phrase when you want to signal that something has recently risen to the top of your priority list.
It's now more important than other things.
It's the present perfect grammar tense in this sentence, with has become.
That shows that this is a recent change for you.
For example, my top priority has become maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
This structure works really well when you're explaining a shift or a change to someone who might have noticed that you're making different choices lately.
And here's another example.
You might say in your work.
My priority has become working for a company that aligns with my values.
Or in health, my top priority has become managing my stress levels. and in learning.
My top priority has become practicing English every day, even if it's just 15 minutes.
And now here's phrase number four for this category.
I've realized that, and then name your value, is essential to me.
This is a great one to use when you've had an insight or an awakening about something you truly need, something that you can't do without.
For example, I've realized that having time alone to recharge is essential for me.
This phrase shows personal growth and self-awareness.
It's particularly powerful when you're explaining why you're setting new boundaries or making changes in your life.
Now, when we're talking about the values behind our priorities, we're talking about the principles or beliefs that guide your decisions and shape what matters to you.
So let's take a look at four more phrases in this section that can help you do that.
Phrase number one is super simple.
I value.
This is the most direct way to state what is important to you and why.
What is the principle or belief behind it?
It's simple, clear, and powerful.
For example, I value flexibility over a high salary.
And this phrase works well in almost every context.
You can use it to explain why you've made a choice, why you're drawn to something, or what you look for in your work, your relationships and your life.
Here are a few more examples.
In your career, you could say, I value autonomy in how I do my work.
Or in your language learning, I value progress over perfection in my English.
And now phrase number two, it's important to me that.
This phrase lets you explain not just what you value, but how it shows up in your life and your decisions.
For example, it's important to me that my work has a positive impact.
Notice after it's important to me that you're stating a condition or requirement.
It's not just about naming the value.
It's about explaining what needs to happen for you to feel aligned or connected to that value.
Let me give you another example.
It's important to me that I have time for my family during the week.
Or it's important to me that I practice speaking English regularly, even if I make mistakes.
Similar to this is phrase number three.
Something is non negotiable for me.
This phrase shows that something is absolutely essential.
There's no compromise on this.
It is a boundary that you've set for yourself.
For example, having weekends free is a non negotiable for me.
This is a strong phrase.
So I want you to use it when you want to make it clear that this value isn't something that you're willing to give up.
And here's another example.
Working in a respectful environment is a non negotiable for me.
Getting seven hours of sleep every night is a non negotiable for me.
Having time. for my morning routine is a non-negotiable for me.
And now here's phrase number four, what I care about most is.
This one is similar to I value, but It feels slightly more personal and emotional.
It emphasizes what truly matters to your heart and soul.
For example, what I care about most is being present with the people that I love.
This phrase works beautifully when you're having a deeper, more reflective conversation about what drives you, what you truly care about.
Here's one more example.
What I care about most is doing work that feels meaningful.
Now, where all of this language becomes truly practical is when you use it to set boundaries and make decisions based on what matters to you.
But before we continue, if you're thinking this is so helpful and I would love to actually practice using this language in real English conversations with real people.
That's exactly what we do inside the Confident Women community.
Every month, we focus on topics like this, the kind of English that helps you express yourself authentically in real life.
You'll practice these kinds of phrases in live conversations, get feedback and build the confidence to use them naturally.
If you would love to join a supportive space where you can practice speaking about what matters to you.
You can learn more at speakconfidentenglishcom slash community.
I'll also leave a link in the episode notes below.
And now let me show you the language we can use to help us set boundaries and make decisions based on our priorities and values.
And I actually want to share a quick example from my own life.
Back in 2022, post COVID, my husband and I were living in Washington DC, a city that I absolutely love.
It's full of life and energy.
But I also realized something.
What I valued had shifted.
I wanted a life that was slower, quieter, and calmer.
I needed to get away from the pressure to always be doing something.
So together we made a really big decision and we moved from Washington DC all the way across the country to a small town in central California where we can enjoy nature and live at a different pace.
That decision required multiple conversations, and i had to explain to friends and family why we were leaving a city we loved, and in the process i used phrases like the ones we've been practicing.
What matters most to me right now is having a slower pace of life.
Or I've realized that being close to nature is essential for me.
My top priority has become reducing stress and enjoying quieter days.
Those phrases gave me clarity when I was trying to make the decision and they helped me have the confidence I needed when I was explaining it to others.
And that's what brings us to the most practical part of today's lesson how to set boundaries and take action based on your priorities.
In fact, we could say that this is where your priorities, your values become real.
It's one thing to know what matters to you.
It's another to protect it, to make time for it, to say no to things that don't align with it.
So let's look at five phrases that will help you do exactly that.
Phrase number one, I've decided to make time for.
This phrase shows that you're taking action.
You're not just thinking about the priority, you're actively creating space for it in your life.
For example, I decided to make time for exercise three times a week.
This works particularly well when you're explaining a new routine or a commitment to someone who might be wondering about your schedule.
Here's another example.
I've decided to make time for professional development every Friday afternoon.
Or I've decided to make time for lunch breaks instead of eating at my desk.
I've decided to make time for English practice every morning, even if it's just a few minutes.
And now phrase number two, I'm choosing to invest my energy in.
This phrase emphasizes that you're making a conscious choice about where your time and your energy go.
For example, i'm choosing to invest my energy in meaningful projects, not just busy work.
The word invest in this one is powerful and important, because it suggests that your energy is valuable and you're being intentional about where you put it.
And here's another example of how you might use it.
I'm choosing to invest my energy in deepening a few friendships rather than maintaining many surface level connections.
And now let's move on to phrase number three.
I'm no longer willing to.
This is a boundary phrase.
It's clear and direct.
You're stating what you've decided is no longer acceptable in your life.
For example, I'm no longer willing to work through weekends.
This phrase works well when you're explaining a change that you've made, especially if people have noticed that you're doing something differently.
Here's another way to use it.
I'm no longer willing to say yes to every social invitation out of guilt.
And now, phrase number four.
I'm learning to say no to.
This phrase I love because it acknowledges that setting boundaries is a process.
It's not always easy to do.
You might still be learning, still practicing, and that's okay.
For example, I'm learning to say no to commitments that drain my energy.
This phrase feels softer than I'm no longer willing to. but it's still powerful.
It shows that self-awareness and growth.
And now here's our last phrase for this section.
I need to create space for.
This one recognizes that priorities require room in your life.
Sometimes that means removing or reducing other things.
For example, I need to create space for creativity in my daily routine.
This one is great when you're in the process of figuring out how to make something a priority, or when you're asking for understanding from others.
Here's another example.
I need to create space for focused work by blocking time on my calendar, or I need to create space for a rest by saying no on weekends.
And here's one more.
I need to create space for hobbies I've been neglecting.
As I said, these five phrases are some of the most practical in today's lesson, because they help you act on your priorities, not just talk about them.
And now there's one more thing that we need to cover.
What do you say when your priorities shift?
Because the truth is priorities change.
What mattered to you five years ago might not matter as much today, and that's not only normal, it's a sign of growth.
But when your priorities shift, you need language to talk about it, especially if the people around you notice that you're making different choices.
So I've got three phrases to help you talk about this.
The first one is my priorities have evolved.
This phrase acknowledges change in a positive way.
That word evolved suggests growth and development.
Not that you were wrong before.
So here's an example.
My priorities have evolved.
I used to focus on career advancement, but Now I value work-life balance more.
This works particularly well in conversations where you're explaining why you've made different decisions, especially to people who knew you when your priorities were different.
And here's a couple more examples.
In your work, you might say, my priorities have evolved.
I'm less interested in climbing the corporate ladder and more focused on meaningful work.
Or for your health and wellness, you might say, my priorities have evolved.
I used to push myself to exhaustion, but now I prioritize rest and recovery.
And now phrase number two, I'm rethinking what's important to me.
This phrase shows that you're in the process of reflection.
You're actively questioning and reevaluating.
For example, I'm rethinking what's important to me right now.
Career success used to be everything, but now I'm not so sure.
This one is great when you're in the middle of that shift and you're not really sure which priority is more important to you.
You haven't made all the changes yet.
You haven't made all the decisions.
This one invites conversation and shows openness.
For example, in your English learning, you might say, I'm rethinking what fluency means to me.
Maybe fluency isn't about perfect grammar.
Maybe it's about being understood.
And now here's phrase number three.
What used to matter doesn't anymore.
This is the most direct way to acknowledge a shift, a change, an evolution.
It's clear and honest.
For example, what used to matter, having a busy social calendar, doesn't anymore.
I'd rather have a meaningful time with just a few close friends.
This is a wonderful phrase to use when you want to be straightforward about the change, especially if someone is pushing you to do something that no longer aligns with your values.
And here's another way to use it.
What used to matter, being the most productive person in the room doesn't anymore.
I need balance.
Or what used to matter, keeping up with all the trends doesn't matter anymore.
I'd rather invest in experiences.
You now have 16 phrases to clearly communicate your priorities and your values in English.
You can name what matters most to you.
You can explain the values behind your decisions.
You can set boundaries and take action on those priorities and you can talk about how your priorities have shifted over time.
This is the kind of vocabulary that helps you move beyond very surface level conversations.
It helps you express who you really are and what truly matters to you.
So here's my question for you.
What matters most to you right now?
How would you talk about it? using one of today's phrases.
Maybe it's, I'm focused on prioritizing rest over productivity.
Or I've realized that having time with my family is essential to me.
Or I'm no longer willing to work through weekends.
I want you to choose one phrase from today's lesson.
And of course, as always, if you want to share it with me, you can do that in the comments below.
I'd love to hear what you're prioritizing in the year ahead.
As always, I hope that you found this lesson helpful and if you did, be sure to let me know.
Take a moment to follow or subscribe wherever you're listening or watching from today.
Thank you so much for joining me and I look forward to seeing you next time.
