Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners, Lee here.
Today we have a very special bonus episode for you, featuring another new story that was written by not one, not two, but over a hundred different kids in our creator club.
We also have a very special edition of Story Pirates Roll Call featuring special guests, Cuckoo!
And it's all coming up right after a few words for the grown-ups.
I'm very different from everybody.
Confusion is the step before curiosity.
Okay, that's a really funny idea.
We have to send that in.
I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling.
I believe all the things in my story.
Human beings are just able to create.
The Story Pirates.
Okay, everybody, here's what's up.
As you may know, every once in a while we invite all our Creator Club members to join me and Peter on a Zoom to write a story together.
Over 100 different kids from all over the world showed up and together we wrote an incredible story about spies hide-and-seek, parkour zombies, robots and a muffin of doom.
And PS grown-ups.
We're doing this whole thing again on Zoom with me and Peter in October, and it's not too late to get your kids involved.
We're going to write a brand new story together and then adapt it for the podcast, just like in today's episode.
Information on how to join us is in the episode description for today's episode.
So, grown-ups...
Check it out and join us.
And now, without further ado, we present to you a story by the Story Pirates Creator.
Club Muffin of Doom, the greatest game of parkour hide and seek.
I'm so bored.
Another day of sitting in the spy office with nothing to do for me, Blip the Elephant, I guess.
Hey, Blip!
Who you talking to?
No one.
I'm just really ready for another spy mission.
I hate being cooped up at the office.
What kind of mission do you think we'll have next?
Don't know.
I just like to go with the flow.
You certainly do, baby.
By the way, I've never asked you this, but how come your name is Baby, baby?
You're 34 and an Australian platypus.
My name's Baby for the same reason I'm always wearing this Viking helmet.
No reason.
All right.
Baby, let's stop waiting around and just barge into our boss's office to ask for a mission.
Come on.
Blip, baby.
Hey, DJ.
Say, that's a great dress.
Does it have elephants on it?
It sure does.
Just because I'm the spy boss and an axolotl doesn't mean I can't have style.
Action bless you.
Thanks, baby.
Now enough messing around.
I have a mission for you.
Finally, as you know, this is the most highly respected spy agency in the world and our People have to be ready at a moment's notice to operate within any possibilities.
That's why the agency is called People of Operative Possibilities, or for short, POOP.
Why does everyone laugh when I say that?
Sorry.
Continue.
Here at Poop, we have a reputation to uphold, which is why it's so important that we compete and win in this year's National Spy Championships in España.
Of course.
This year we're up against our arch rivals, the Evil Spy Corporation, an agency so evil that they only employ zombies, robots and more robots.
I really hate those more robots.
We all do, baby.
Which is why I'm sending you two to win in the ultimate spy game, Hide and Seek.
You're sending an elephant to play Hide and Seek?
Watch yourself, baby.
I'm great at Hide and Seek.
DJ, we won't let you down.
Those zombies, robots, and more robots won't be able to find us.
They better not.
Now, before you head to Spain, Dumbo's here from the gadget department.
Hello, Agent Blip, Agent Baby.
How's it going, Dumbo?
Great.
Not only am I a wiener dog and huge, but I'm also the gadget guy.
Yes, we know.
What do you have for us?
I have this.
Ooh, a muffin!
Yummy!
No!
Don't eat that!
Huh?
That's no ordinary muffin.
That's the Muffin Ray of Doom.
That's a pretty intense name.
It's a pretty intense muffin.
You see, it shoots hundreds of tiny, blinding, bright muffins.
Not sure when we'll need that to play hide and seek, but we'll take it with us.
Do you have something to carry it in?
No.
All right, then.
Thanks.
Come on, baby!
To Spain.
Welcome ladies and gentlemen and animals and spies to the world spy championships final event.
Hide and seek.
In this corner we have blip and baby from the people of operative possibilities, or poop for short.
Hola España.
And in the other corner, Poop will be competing against their arch rivals, the Evil Spy Corporation.
We are zombies.
And robots.
And more robots.
You don't need to say more robots.
It's redundant.
Strong disagree.
There's a clear distinction between the robots and the more robots.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yes.
Oh, what are you going to do about it?
Slap, slap, stop beating yourself.
Quiet, robots.
Sorry.
It's time to hide and seek.
Here are the rules.
If the hiders aren't found in the allotted amount of time, they get points.
They also get points if they can travel to multiple places and not be found.
Oh, and also, extra points for doing parkour.
I love parkour!
Any questions?
Uh, yes, several, actually.
Uh, how does... Great!
Poop, you're hiding first.
You have a 20-minute head start.
Go!
Lip, where should we go?
I know the perfect three places to hide.
Let's go, baby!
Parkour!
Parkour!
Parkour!
Parkour!
Parkour!
Here we are in a place that zombies, robots, and more robots would never think to find us.
A jungle gym.
Not sure about that logic, but it seems to have worked.
No one's around.
Shall we go to the second place?
Let's go, baby.
Parkour.
Parkour on the monkey box.
Parkour down the slide.
Here we are at the second place.
A place that no robot would look for us.
A coral reef.
Beautiful, I might add.
Shall we go to the third and final place?
Let's go.
Parkour.
Underwater parkour.
Underwater parkour.
We're just swimming, really.
Swim.
Swim core.
Swim core.
Here we are in the final place, the Eiffel Tower.
Wow, these croissants are delicious.
Hey, Blip, can we stay here forever?
No, Bebe.
We have to return to España.
All right.
Let's go.
Time's up, and the evil spies fail to find Poop.
Also, Blip and Baby manage to hide in three different places while doing a ton of very cool parkour.
They get a whole bunch of points.
Oh, man.
Man, they made us look like fools out there.
Don't worry.
We robots can out-hide them all.
Us more robots, too.
That's implied.
Don't tell me what I meant.
I'll tell you what you meant.
Get out of my face.
Your programming is faulty.
Oh, are you fronting?
Your programming is faulty.
Don't.
I'll bring it out.
I'll leave you alone.
If I could fail, I would hurt.
Robots, quit it.
Sorry.
It's your time to hide in three, two, one.
Come on, let's go.
Follow me this way.
This isn't over.
No, your GPS is faulty.
I can't hear you.
All right, Poop.
In 20 minutes, you get to give chase.
And I know just where to look to find a zombie.
Where?
We're going to the graveyard.
Here we are at the graveyard.
But they're not here, Blip.
Only a bunch of skeletons.
Oh, would you like to hear some music?
I can play my ribs like a marimba.
Ooh, yeah, listen.
Ooh, yeah, marimba.
Uh, no thanks, Skeleton.
Oh, man.
Where to now, Blip?
The Tower of London.
It's creepy in here, but still no zombies.
Let's try a stinky swamp.
This place is stinky, and there's no zombies.
Maybe we should try where a robot might go.
Let's go to a robot factory.
Hi, and welcome to the robot factory.
Do you have any robots?
All sold out.
Rats.
Let's go to the catacombs.
The what?
There's no one here except... More skeletons?
A five, six, seven, eight.
Oh, yeah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Let's go to the fancy robot charging building.
I can't believe it, Blip.
There's not a single robot even here.
Are we about to lose to the evil Spy Corporation?
Not if I have anything to do with it.
Baby, where is the very last place you would expect to find zombies, robots, and more robots?
I don't know.
Maybe, uh...
At a trash can at the end of the rainbow?
That's it!
Baby, follow me!
Hey, you guys are taking up too much space behind this trash can.
If they manage to find the end of the rainbow here, they will see my rotting limbs sticking out.
It's not my fault.
It's the more robots.
Oh, now that there's someone to blame, there is a distinction between robots.
Don't get me started, hypocrite.
You think you are.
Say that to my face.
Robots, quit your fighting.
Because you've been found.
Oh, man, they found us.
That's right, which means the winner of the 2025 World Spy Championship is... Pop!
Oh, sorry, I misread that.
Poop!
We did it!
We finally defeated the evil spy corporation!
You sure did!
Boss, what are you doing here?
I'm here to present this year's first place prize!
Blip, baby!
On behalf of all the spies of the world, we present you with this!
A meeting with King...
That's right.
It's me, King Mutt.
Wow.
I can't believe we're meeting the King Mutt.
And I rarely make public appearances.
Which is why losing this competition was all part of our plan.
What?
We only competed to bring King Mutt out of hiding so we could steal his power!
Oh no!
It's a foolproof plan!
Robots!
Capture him!
Okay!
No, he meant us.
They were talking to me.
Oh, really?
You are another robot.
I'm gonna slap, slap.
Quickly, while they're distracted, do something.
But all I have in my pocket is this.
Oh.
Muffin of Doom!
Are you thinking what I'm thinking, baby?
Use the Muffin of Doom to defeat the evil Spy Corporation.
Then do parkour into a freeze frame while awesome guitar music plays for a couple of seconds before we unfreeze and both scream the end.
I was thinking literally all of that.
Muffin of Doom!
Hardcore!
Freeze frame!
The end!
We'll be right back after a few words for the grown-ups.
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And now it's time for Story Pirates Roll Call!
Send us your story.
Send us your story.
We read them all.
We read them all.
You know we love them.
Now the time for story pirates roll.
Yeah.
Yeah, as well as our incredible special guest today, who the Story Pirates are going on tour with this October.
Please welcome Brian and Neil from Cuckoo.
Woo!
What's up, guys?
A two-date tour.
Wow, two-date tour.
Y'all are doing a lot more shows, but we're just jumping on for two of them, a little sampler.
All right, let's get into the first story.
This first story is by a seven-year-old in the United Kingdom named Freya, and Freya's story is called The Afternoon T-Rex. t-rex spelled t-e-a t-rex like that you drink of course i got it yeah you get it okay do you guys have had tea before you know you ever heard of it yeah we've we've had this we've had a spit out liquid before yeah we've had tea once There was a dinosaur that was a type of dinosaur called an afternoon T-Rex.
It was kind of like a T-Rex, but it ate afternoon tea every day and it was obsessed with tea.
He had a hat that was in the shape of a teacup.
The only problem was because his arms were so tiny.
It was really hard for him to actually drink tea from a teacup, which made him very sad.
He was always spilling tea and he couldn't reach his mouth with the little sandwiches he usually just ate with his mouth straight off the table.
Then one day when he was just walking along, sadly, he saw another afternoon T-Rex.
She looked just like him, but bigger and with a teapot hat.
Hello, he said.
Hello, said the other afternoon T-Rex.
They started talking and realized that they both spilled tea every day and sometimes couldn't even put the little sandwiches in their mouths, all because of their tiny arms.
The first afternoon T-Rex asked the other one to dance.
They got to a part where they were spinning around holding claws and they loved spinning around, so they kept spinning and spinning, and spinning until their arms stretched.
Now they could drink tea from their teacups and put as many little sandwiches in their mouths as they wanted.
They were so happy.
The only problem was, now with their long arms...
They sometimes tripped over, but they thought it was worth it for all the tea.
The end.
Wow.
That's like a rom-com.
This is gorgeous.
Yeah, it's inspiring.
You just got to meet the right person and your biggest problems in your life will be solved.
I just can't get the image out of my head of two T-Rexes with super long, dangly arms that they trip over.
Yeah, it's an interesting sort of version of the tiny arms joke right, like it's a nice spin on that.
I was thinking.
I was thinking it's either going to be stretchy.
I was like this is either going to be stretchy arms or they're going to 3d print an insane cup that like goes up to their mouth.
And then this whole new craft fair business of like T-Rex 3D printing, which still could happen in the sequel.
That's where my mind was going to.
It was more of like a cyborg situation, though.
I thought they were going to acquire yeah, some sort of attachment to be able to have longer arms and drink the tea, or some sort of beverage device.
You know that attached to the beverage and allowed them to drink it in a different way.
But we got the body modification one way or the other.
Do you guys think the arms are stretched out at the forearm or from elbow to shoulder?
I guess I sort of imagined it was, yeah, it was an equitable stretch.
It was a uniform pull.
Yeah, now freya had.
Um, you started off with tea, but the actual best part about this story is sandwiches, because that's what's really important here.
Right, it's like A little sandwich.
Because this could be savory.
It could be sweet.
It could be like a little strawberry cream sandwich, a little crumpet.
I want biscuits.
I want all that stuff.
I want crackers, little cookies.
I want it all.
Freya's from the UK.
That's true.
So Freya knows her afternoon tea. treats and their little sandwiches.
That's true.
Gentlemen, let's get on to our next story.
I was wondering, Neil, would you read this next story for us?
It's by 14-year-old Titus in Canada. and it's called Submarines in Origin Story.
Would you read it for us?
I would love to.
Thank you, Titus, for sending this one in.
Submarines in Origin Story.
Hello, and welcome to History Class.
I'm Mr. Albert, and today I'll be teaching you the history of not-so-subtle submarines.
Let's begin.
Submarines were invented during the World Sub Sandwich War, when subcontractors subleased several subplots of land that were subdivided in Nebraska.
Submarines were supposed to dig through subsoils under the Nebraskan farmland but failed, so they were moved to Nebraska's only tiny pond.
After that, well, you know the rest.
If you want a more detailed explanation of submarine history, go watch my video on my YouTube channel.
Subsidiary Subways Under Sudsbury.
Any questions?
Yes, sir.
I have a lot of questions.
My first one is, ding, saved by the bell.
The end.
Amazing story.
Brian, any thoughts?
I thought Neil was actually like just saying like, I have a question about this story.
That's the sign of a good actor is he thought he was coming out of the story, but he was actually.
So deep in character.
Yeah, I'm trying to think how many usages of sub is in there.
It's like five different usages of sub in the different, you know, subterranean.
Okay, so I do have a question about this story.
Saved by the bell, it says at the end.
Does this mean that Mr. Albert made all this up in the world of the story?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I believe that Mr Albert has realized we've entered a new era where you can't ignore YouTube if you want to have a business, if you want to make money and make a living.
And so he's trying to increase his YouTube subscribers by making up wild stories in class and then pointing his kids in his class to his YouTube channel so that they'll go and subscribe, thinking they'll hear something wild and crazy.
So he's a YouTube conspiracy theorist?
Well, yes, I guess so.
He's making up alternate histories.
He's a revisionist history YouTuber.
Irresponsible, Mr. Albert.
It is very irresponsible.
And I don't think it's appropriate for him to be doing that in class.
But at least Titus in writing the story like he's a real pro.
When he shared the link for his YouTube, he went into the settings and got the shareable link and didn't do the main one on the bottom that has the dot shared file.
Uh-huh.
So you know Titus is grinding.
You know he's working hard.
Same with Albert.
They could have bitly linked it.
They could have tiny URL'd it.
All right.
We have one more story to go here.
Peter, would you do us the honor of reading this for us?
I would love to.
Our final story comes to us today from an eight-year-old from Georgia named Lorelei.
And Lorelei's story is called Attack of the Immortal Alien Cockroaches.
I am a shoe.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am a shoe.
I have a great tale to tell you.
Dramatic pause.
It is the origin story of aliens.
Crowd.
Huh?
Weird talking shoe.
Basically how aliens came to be.
Oh.
Narrator.
Once upon a time, Josephine and Emmy were playing in the pool when they saw a cockroach.
When Josephine scooped it up with a reusable water balloon and put it on the side of the pool, it moved.
Ah, they both screamed and Emmy ran away screaming.
Emmy climbed a tree and the cockroach followed.
I, the narrator, also ran away screaming.
Anyway, back to the story.
Emmy luckily had a parachute in her swimsuit.
The cockroach did too?
Cockroach.
I got you now!
After Emmy got to the ground, she ran to her house and jumped acrobatically to her deck, and then the cockroach pulled out of umbrella and a fan and flew up to the deck.
She went to get her mom, who apparently builds spaceships, and they sent the cockroach off to the moon.
Cockroach, i will be back for revenge one day.
You'll see Dramatic spaceship blast off.
They sent him up without a spacesuit thinking he would die.
But the cockroach had a secret.
He was immortal.
And so eventually he became an alien cockroach and went to crop farms to get revenge.
And that's the story of how aliens came to be.
The end.
Narrator.
I'm just a narrator who is hired by the weird shoe.
Weird talking shoe.
Hey, narrator.
I got hired.
I did not want to do this.
The end.
Really unprofessional of the narrator to just lay it out like that at the end of the story.
I guess what he's doing really is preparing... for a future where the cockroaches are ruling us.
Can cockroaches live on the moon, actually, with no oxygen?
I can't remember.
I know they can live in insane environments and stuff like that.
They cannot.
But you know what can?
They cannot.
Is a tartar grade.
You know, a tardigrade.
Oh yeah.
Tardigrade.
That was like, yeah.
Those tiny microscopic, uh, entity or living.
They look like they're more than one cell, right?
They look like little bears, but they're the smallest thing and you can freeze them.
You can take them to space and you can thaw them out.
And they're the hardest things to kill.
Tartar grade?
Yeah.
Or a microscopic, like, being.
Wow.
They got legs.
They're cute.
That's cool.
Something I liked about this story is that it's like a meta situation where it's like someone, it's like a story about a story.
Is that a common thing in the Story Pirates universe or the submissions you get?
It's fairly common.
We've talked about this before.
Narrators are often self-aware.
Yeah, and emboldened in a way that...
Makes them behave in questionable ways.
This has another layer to it, more than normal, which is the weird talking shoe, which is the backstory we have not explored yet.
Is the one who hired the narrator and needed to tell this story?
The talking shoe did not really want the adoring public that's listening to the story to know that the mom makes the spaceship.
It was like real like, Oh, right.
Just slid it in there, you know?
Guys, it has been so wonderful to have you here.
Cuckoo is touring basically everywhere all the time.
So, Go, where can they find you guys online?
Well, there's a thing called the internet.
And you type in our name.
Cuckoo.
And you hope you find it.
You'll find it.
And if you want to see...
Cuckoo.pizza?
Yeah, that's our website.
That is the best website I've ever heard of.
All right.
And if you want to see Cuckoo with Destroy Virates Live, in October we're going to be performing with them in Missoula Montana.
October 17th.
Travel to see it.
We are also going to be in Boise, Idaho with Cuckoo on October 21st.
And to read all of today's stories just go to storypirates.com.
And remember you can watch an even longer version of Roll Call on the Story Pirates YouTube page.
With help from your grown-up.
Now it's time for you to write us a story.
Grown-ups can submit stories at storypirates.com.
And remember, we respond to every single story we receive.
That's it for today's episode.
Grownups.
Don't forget to check the show notes for today's episode to find out how your kids can join us for our next Create a Story session in October.
We'll be back next week with more new stories.
Until then, stay creative and stay kind.
The Story Pirates Podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios.
Executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka.
This episode was produced by Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller, and Lee Overtree.
Recording, sound design, and mixing by Sam Baer at The Relic Room in New York City.
Theme song by Bobby Lord.
Roll call theme by Andrew Barbato.
Musical scoring by Jack Mitchell.
Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin.
This episode features performances by...
I'm upset that we were defeated and I blame you.
What are you gonna do about it?
I'll slap fight all day.
Get in here.
Stop it.
What do you got?
Stop it.
Come here.
Get your metal robot hands out of my space.
Oh, I'll show you space.
Respect my boundaries.
Boundaries.
Oh yeah.
Take this.
No.
I'll get you.
Ow.
I'll get you.
Ow.
Hey, what's that on your robot shirt?
Where?
Boink.
Ow.
Got you.
My nose.
My robot nose.
Look over there.
What's where?
Oh, you got me.
You looked foolish.
I'll give you robot.
Robot noogie.
No.
Ow.
Robot noogie.
Ow.
I'll give you robot wedgie.
Joke's on you.
It doesn't work.
Robots don't wear underwear.
Shoot.
I'll give you robot wet willy.
Actually, that's not safe.
I'll get you.
Water and robots don't make... More robot.
Are you okay?
Nothing to see here.
I'm slowly walking away.
Everything's fine.
I'm so sorry.
