So if you've been with me for the past couple of weeks, you know we're on a bit of a journey together with our special four -week summer series, The Inner Architect Reset.
So first we hit that mid -year reset button, kind of talking about how to reassess what we started the year wanting and where we are now, what we're doing about it.
We paused, we took a breath, looked honestly at what was working, what wasn't, and what we wanted to release and make space for.
And it was about clearing the canvas, getting ready, And then last week, we dove into the Future Self Project.
We grabbed our drafting tools and started to really envision that magnificent blueprint, that compelling, vivid picture of who you truly want to become and what you want your next chapter to feel like.
And we talked about how your brain actually works like a powerful GPS, ready to tune into that vision and guide you.
And that's where the rubber really kind of meets the road, right?
Because having a beautiful blueprint, a compelling vision is absolutely essential.
But a vision, no matter how inspiring, no matter how well -crafted, it remains just a vision until you start laying the foundation, until you begin to build.
You can have the most stunning architectural plans for your dream home, but if you never ever pour the concrete, if you never frame the walls, it remains this beautiful drawing on paper.
So the big question for us today, the one we're going to dive into together is how do we actually live that vision every single day?
How do we move beyond feeling constantly busy and reactive and instead step into a state of natural flow where the process just feels organic, where where your days are designed to fuel your purpose and not drain it.
And this week, we're getting incredibly practical.
We're going to explore the surprising science behind how our daily actions shape our lives and how you can intentionally design your environment and your habits to make your desired future not just possible, but pretty much inevitable.
We'll cover powerful common sense strategies that'll really help you build the very foundations of your most meaningful life, one intentional brick at a time.
It's about turning aspiration into actionable steps, transforming your blueprint into a living, breathing reality.
So excited to share this with you.
I'm Jonathan Fields, and this is Good Life Project.
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So today we're diving into episode three of the Inner Architect Reset Summer Series, and we're focusing on what we call foundation and flow, designing your days for peak living.
And as I mentioned in my lead up, having that compelling vision of your future self, that detailed blueprint that we worked on last week is kind of an absolute non -negotiable.
It gives you a sense of direction.
It ignites your motivation and it helps to tune your brain to spot opportunities.
But here's the thing, the most beautiful blueprint in the world, it won't build itself.
It requires layers of foundation.
It requires framing the walls, installing the systems, adding the finishing touches.
And in the architecture of a good life, those foundations and systems are your daily habits and routines.
For so long, I like a whole lot of people thought that if I just had enough willpower, you know, that I could kind of muster the strength that I could force myself to do almost anything.
And sometimes it would actually work.
I mean, there was a lot of, there's a big price to pay when it happened.
But, you know, most times, I just fell flat on of my face when I relied on willpower.
I'd make grand pronouncements on January 1st, or just after a particularly inspiring conversation.
This year, I'm going to meditate every day for an hour.
I'm going to write a book in three months.
I'm going to run a 10K.
For a few days, it's funny because I used to do the running one when I lived in the city for three decades.
Literally, I would go to the finish line of the New York Marathon, which is in Central Park, and it's just a couple blocks from my house and I'd watch all these people come across the finish line, all walks of humanity, all levels of ability and challenge.
And I would be in tears and be like, next year, next year.
And then three days later, nope, that whole thing had vanished away.
For a few days, maybe even a few weeks or two, I'd be on fire and I'd maybe white knuckle my way through like doing things to try and make it happen.
But then inevitably life would happen.
a busy travel schedule, a sick kid, stressful work deadline, and suddenly that willpower well would just completely run dry.
I'd fall off the wagon, feel guilty.
And then the cycle of grand ambition followed by self -reproach would begin again.
It was really exhausting, especially because you start to send a message to yourself that I'm the type of person who says, I'm going to do something.
And then I don't. And from a confidence standpoint and esteem standpoint, it really, you know, you kind of take a big hit on an identity level.
So the myth of willpower is a powerful one in our culture.
We're told that if we just want it badly enough, if we just try harder, if we discipline ourselves more, we'll achieve our goals.
And while effort, you know, it certainly is a part of the equation.
And also depending on on the particular outcome you're looking for, relying solely on willpower is an absolute losing battle.
So why? Because willpower is, it's kind of a resource that doesn't get you all that far.
It's like a muscle that fatigues.
And there's really interesting research, you know, for a long time, it was viewed as this depletable well that could be dipped into.
to. Now the research is actually a lot more complicated around willpower.
In fact, it tends to relate more to how you think about willpower.
In fact, if you think it's repletable, it is.
If you think it's not, then it's not.
But what we know is that willpower for anything that is big, that's high stakes, that lasts long where there's complexity and adversity, it just doesn't do the trick.
Every decision you make, every impulse you resist, every time you push yourself to do something you don't feel like doing, you're just bumping up against more of the wall.
You're draining your willpower.
And even if it is repletable, it's not a long -term sustainable fuel for making big, real things happen.
So the solution, it really isn't to, quote, try harder or be more disciplined or get grittier.
In fact, even, you know, you probably heard the word grit before.
I had Angela Duckworth, who coined the phrase and did the research behind on the podcast years back.
And it's really debatable about whether that is trainable or what it really is or isn't, or whether it applies to large -scale kind of amorphous shifting complex outcomes rather than straightforward, simple ones.
So the whole world of willpower, discipline, grit, it's murky.
It's not the type of thing we want to hang our hat on.
The better solution is to design your life, your environment, and your systems in a way that makes the desired actions easy, even automatic, and the undesirable ones difficult.
It's really more about working with your brain, not against it.
And this is the essence of our foundation and flow approach. It's about creating an internal and external architecture that supports your future self rather than sabotaging it.
So to understand this, we want to talk a little bit more about the fascinating science of habits.
At its core, a habit is often known as a three -part psychological process, often referred to as the habit loop.
It starts with the cue.
So this is the kind of a trigger.
It's a signal that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and also tells it which habit to use.
It could be time of day, so like 7 a .m. wake -up time, a location, that could be walking into your kitchen, walking into your office.
It could be a specific emotion, feeling stressed.
When I feel stressed, X happens.
It could be any preceding action, like finishing your coffee.
Okay, that is the cue, or even a particular person.
Think of the cue as like a green light for your brain to initiate a learned behavior, right?
So that's step one in the habit loop.
That brings us to the second part of the habit loop, the routine.
This is the behavior itself, the habit that you perform.
It's the physical, mental, or emotional action that you take in response to the cue.
This is the part we usually focus on changing.
For example, grabbing a snack, checking social media, taking a deep breath or opening your journal, right?
And that brings us to the third part of the habit loop.
And we call that the reward. And this is the benefit that your brain gets from completing the routine.
It's kind of the reason the habit exists.
It could be a feeling of pleasure, a sense of accomplishment, a reduction in stress, a temporary escape, or even social approval.
It could be status -based.
And that reward, it reinforces the loop, and it makes your brain want to repeat the routine next time it encounters that very same cue.
The brain essentially learns to associate the cue with the reward. And the routine, it just becomes the pathway to get there.
So here's where it gets even more interesting.
The brain's primary feel -good chemical, ago, and we actually talked about this in last week's episode, dopamine, it also plays a crucial role in this loop.
For a long time, scientists thought dopamine was just really all about pleasure.
You've heard that term probably, I'm sure, like get the dopamine hit, ooh, like quick high.
But more recent research, notably from neuroscientists like Kent Barrage and Robert Sapolsky showed that dopamine's primary role in habit formation and motivation is actually linked to anticipation and wanting rather than just liking or pleasure itself.
So the brain releases dopamine, not just when you receive a reward, but when you anticipate one.
And again, remember, we talked a little bit about this in last week's summer series episode, but it applies in this case particularly well also.
So think about it. A gambler gets a dopamine spike before they they actually place a bet, not just when they win.
A smoker gets a hit of dopamine when they see the cigarette, not just when they light it.
It's the craving, the wanting, the anticipation of the reward that drives us to take action.
And this is why habits are so powerful and why they can also be so hard to break when it's one that you don't want to keep doing.
Your brain is literally being train, to seek out that anticipatory dopamine hit.
It's the engine of desire.
So our goal with our foundation and flow approach, it isn't to fight the habit loop.
It's to re -engineer it.
It's about really consciously designing new cues, new routines, and new rewards that align with your your future self project that move you closer to it on a day to day lived basis.
It's about making the behaviors that serve you just incredibly attractive and easy and the behaviors that don't incredibly unattractive and difficult.
So we're essentially hacking your brain's natural reward system to work for your highest good.
So here's another really interesting insight, the power of small changes or micro habits.
And we often think that we need to make these massive kind of sweeping changes to see results, to achieve that big outcome that we want.
I need to go to the gym for an hour every day, or I need to write a thousand words every morning if you want to become a writer or work on a book.
And while those goals are, they're certainly admirable goals, like they're well -intended, they can also feel overwhelming, especially especially when willpower is kind of waning, which almost everything affects in some way, shape, or form.
But research popularized by books like James Clear's Atomic Habits, B .J.
Fogg's Tiny Habits, Charles Duhigg's The Power of Habit, really consistently show that significant lasting change often comes from tiny, consistent actions.
These tiny habits require minimal effort.
They integrate seamlessly into your daily routine.
And when performed consistently, they lead to meaningful progress that has this kind of compounding effect over time, a little bit, a little bit, a little bit.
So think of it like compound interest, but for your life.
A tiny deposit every day over time creates massive wealth.
A tiny consistent habit over time creates massive life change.
So the psychological benefit of a small win also reinforces the behavior, building confidence and momentum.
So, you know, with understanding the habit loop, the power of dopamine and the magic of these micro habits, let's maybe dive into some key strategies for designing your days for peak living and for creating that foundation and flow state.
that will, over time, move you closer into that future self project.
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So we'll start with some key ideas and strategies.
Number one, identify your anger habits.
So think of anger habits as kind of like the keystone habits in your life.
Duhigg, I believe, calls them keystone habits in the power of habit.
These are, say, one to two core habits that if consistently done, they have this ripple effect on other areas of your life and directly support your future self project, that vision of who you want to become, what you want to do.
They create a positive domino effect, if you can think about it that way.
When you establish one powerful anchor habit, other positive behaviors often fall into place more easily, even with you not even thinking about them.
So how does this actually work?
work. An anchor habit is a small, consistent action that when performed, it makes it easier or kind of more likely for other positive habits to follow.
It's kind of like the first domino knocks over a whole road, creates a sense of momentum and accomplishment that it just spills over into the other parts of your day.
So what are some examples of this?
A morning routine. You know, for many, a consistent morning routine is a powerful anchor.
And by the way, if your day doesn't actually start in the morning, if you're a shift worker, if you just have a time shifted schedule, whatever time you actually wake up, you can switch morning for afternoon.
You can just call it a waking routine if that lands more effectively with you, but that can become a really powerful anchor.
So if you start your day with quiet reflection, movement, or a healthy breakfast, you're you're actually more likely to make good choices throughout the rest of the day.
It's like it sets the tone for focus, energy, and intentionality.
Similarly, we can call it an evening or end of day wind down, right?
A consistent evening routine or end of day routine can be another anchor for better sleep, which then impacts everything from mood to focus, patience, and decision -making the next day.
This could be something as simple as reading a physical book, doing some gentle stretches, listening to your favorite wind down playlist, which is one of the things that I tend to do often, or just simply disconnecting from screens 30 minutes before bed.
Another anchor routine, potentially daily movement.
Even a 10 minute walk can become an anchor for you.
It boosts energy, it clears your head, it often leads to better food choices and more creative thinking because of the sort of like follow -on effect of how movement and exercise affects all systems in your body, including your brain chemistry.
It's a small commitment, that anger habit, that initial behavior that yields disproportionately large returns because it sets in motion a whole bunch of follow -on habits that also build positive behavior.
behavior. So what do we do with this?
First, look at your future self -project from last week.
If you haven't listened to that, by the way, yet, that's fine.
You can go back and do that after this and this will all make even more sense.
It really comes together beautifully into a whole sort of like approach and including the first part of this series.
But look at that future self -project from last week.
What's one small daily action that if consistently done would would make the biggest difference in moving towards the vision that you want to inhabit?
What's the one habit that would really create the most positive ripple effect?
This is your anger habit.
And don't pick five, which is our inclination.
I'll do this, this, this, and this, because it becomes overwhelming.
Then we don't do any of them.
Pick one, a single one, maybe two at the most to start with.
When it comes to these types of things, the simpler, the better, right?
So that's an exploration of anger habits and they work.
Second strategy, environmental design for effortless action.
I'll say that again.
Environmental design for effortless action.
We want to design our environment so that it supports the way that we want to behave. hate.
This is where we get really clever.
So instead of relying on willpower, which we know really doesn't work beyond a hot second, we manipulate our environment to make desired actions easy and undesirable actions difficult.
So it's really about designing your external world, the world around you, your environment, your setting to support your best self, kind of subtly nudging you toward that future self.
So how do we do that?
A couple of tips here.
One, make it obvious and easy.
So we want to be creating cues and reducing friction.
So what's the principle behind this?
The easier something is to do and the more visible the cue, the more likely you are to do it.
We are creatures of convenience.
We don't love to work to make anything happen.
Our brains naturally gravitate towards the path of least resistance.
So for For example, how might this show up?
How might you actually make things visible and convenient?
Let's say you want the behavior to be to exercise.
So you might lay out your work clothes or your workout clothes the night before right next to your bed.
Put your running shoes by the door, have your gym bag packed and in the car.
So the cue, which is your clothes and your shoes, is obvious.
and the routine, getting dressed, going to the gym is made a whole lot easier because the initial steps are actually already done.
So you kind of remove the barrier.
You remove the friction.
You remove the mental load of decision -making.
You don't have to make any decisions.
There's no preparation that you have to do.
You literally open your eyes, slide your feet into your shoes, throw in your clothes, grab your bag and walk out the door.
There's nothing in your way stopping you from doing it.
another example let's take healthy eating right as the behavior we want to actually encourage here so keep healthy snacks visible on the counter or at eye level in the fridge and you might prep healthy meals on sunday so that they're kind of grab and go during the week this is what i often do i'll spend a chunk of the time on sunday cooking or prepping a whole bunch of stuff you know like i'll take a whole bunch of veggies and kind of mise en place them chop them up and make them available so that there's no effort when I actually want to just grab and go with them during the week.
Or maybe put your water bottle on your desk where you can't miss it if you're really trying to just stay better hydrated.
If it's super convenient, you can reach out with your hand, you see it, so there's this constant visual reminder, you're much more likely to do the behavior.
If the healthy option is the easiest option, you're just far more likely to choose it.
What about things like, let's say reading, like I want to read more, right?
Okay. So how might I make this easier and more visible?
Place the book you want to read literally on your pillow or on your nightstand instead of leaving it on a bookshelf somewhere.
This acts as that visual cue right before you get into bed where you can lie down.
It's right there to turn the page open.
If you need glasses or reading glasses, make sure they're right there with the book too.
I have that right next to me on my bedstand, my book and my reading glasses, assesses so I don't get frustrated.
And that can become a great cue.
What about things like meditation, right?
So many people say like, I want to be meditating.
I've heard it's amazing.
It's so good for me, but I just never have time.
I miss all the different excuses.
So have your meditation cushion or comfortable chair already set up in a quiet corner.
If you prefer listening to a guided meditation, you know, like on an app or whatever it is that you do, to choose it the night before or choose it before you actually need it.
Have it set up so that you don't have to actually go scrolling.
What should I listen to today?
Whose voice do I want to hear in my eyes or in my ears at 6 a .m. this morning?
Make all those decisions beforehand.
So literally, you open your app, you tap the button, and somebody's voice is in your ears guiding you.
No need to clear space or get things set up.
It's ready to go. And you can just drop hop right into it.
I do this actually for playing music.
I play guitar horribly, but I love playing guitar.
And I have an old guitar that I've had for like 30 years now and had the amazing experience about six years ago of building my own guitar.
And I found that when I keep them kind of tucked away in their cases, I just never play.
So if you're thinking, I'd love to be just playing my instrument more regularly or learning to play an instrument, I want to practice every day for 15 minutes, keep the instrument readily available, not hidden away or tucked away or in a closet.
So I actually have my guitars literally hanging on my wall in my office space right now.
They're about five feet from me as I speak.
So I can see them at any given moment in time.
If I'm in the middle of the day, I'm like, I can just take a 15 minute music break, you know?
So if they were in and the cases in the closet, I pretty much never play them.
And I know this because I did that for years.
What about things like making art?
Instead of having to go into a cabinet and set up everything, keep a dedicated space.
Even if it's a tiny little portion of a desktop, make that a dedicated little space where you do your art or your craft. Set it up, have the supplies ready ready to go, have everything just right there.
So you can just step in and paint or draw or craft. So there's no barrier to stop you from diving in.
The idea here is we're making it more visual because the more we see it, the more likely we are to have a reminder to do it.
And we're removing friction from the process.
We're taking away all of the things that would stop us from doing it.
Right? So this, what we're really doing here is we're directly leveraging the cue part of the the habit loop.
By making the cue for a desired behavior just highly visible and the action easy, it makes it almost impossible not to do it.
Minimizes the reliance on willpower and maximizes the likelihood of the habit, the thing we want to be doing actually happening.
And it also taps into the brain's preference for efficiency.
What about the other side of the spectrum here.
What about the behaviors that we actually want to do less of?
We kind of flip the script here.
Well, we take those and when it comes to the cue, we make it invisible and hard. So removing cues and increasing friction can be really effective here.
The idea is that the harder something is to do and the less visible the cue, the less likely you are to do it.
So if there are habits that you don't want to be doing, make it less visible and make it harder to do.
Out of sight, out of mind, the classic phrase, right?
So if you want to break a quote, bad habit, increase the friction and make it less visible.
Some examples here.
Let's say unhealthy eating or things that you'd rather, like you don't want to eat a certain time of day or certain types of foods, right?
There's snacks that you're just, if they're out there and they're They're easier to grab and go.
You literally can't stop yourself from eating them.
So instead, put those perceived unhealthy snacks or snacks that you don't wanna be eating in an opaque container, in a high cupboard or better yet, just don't buy them so they're actually physically not in the environment.
I mean, if you're like, oh, I wanna go have that yummy snack and it requires you getting into a car and driving somewhere to get it, the likelihood of you doing that is gonna drop dramatically.
So don't keep tempting foods in plain sight.
If you have to climb a chair to get to the cookie or get in a car, you're just less likely to eat them.
And if you don't have the visual cue of seeing them all the time, you'll actually be less stimulated to want them, right?
We're having smaller dopamine hits for the anticipation.
Now, what about things like digital distraction?
This is another behavior that a lot of people are really trying to minimize their level of distraction with all sorts of devices.
devices. So what if you actually keep your phone in entirely another room while working or spending time with family or sleeping?
Or what if you turn off notifications and log out of social media apps on your computer or on your device?
You literally log out of them.
So if you want to actually check any of them, you can't just tap one time with your finger and be there.
You literally have to go through the process of, well, first remembering your login, which most of us struggle with, and then entering it and then logging in again, right?
Put your remote on for your TV in a drawer in another room if you don't want to be watching so much TV.
These extra steps, they create enough friction to make you pause and reconsider.
And by removing them from your visual field of view, it kind of short circuits the cue part of the habit.
So these are things that I think can be just super effective in a lot of different ways.
And, you know, what we're really doing here is we are removing or obscuring the cue for an undesirable behavior.
So that has the effect of not letting us even start the habit loop.
It stops it before it even starts reducing the anticipatory dopamine hit and really making the routine less likely to occur.
You're essentially building guardrails for the behaviors that you want to stop doing.
doing. So a third strategy here that I find is just really powerful, habit stacking or habit bundling.
This is a kind of a brilliant way to leverage existing habits to build new ones, or to make less desirable tasks more appealing.
It's something I explored a while back with behavioral scientist Katie Milkman, author of How to Change, who has done extensive research on on these very concepts.
So let's talk about the two of them.
And by the way, um, I forgot to mention, I mentioned this in the last, the first two episodes of the summer series, there will be a PDF that accompanies this.
So if you want to take notes, that's great.
You can, um, but we'll give you a PDF that kind of summarizes all the stuff that I'm talking about here today so that you can reflect back on it when you're really designing your own foundation and sense of access us to habits and flow.
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It's on Prime. So let's talk about a third strategy, and we call that habit bundling.
This is a brilliant way to sort of leverage existing habits or to make less desirable tasks more appealing.
It's something I explored with behavioral scientist Katie Milkman, author of How to Change, who has done extensive research on these concepts.
And it's really kind of a cool way to, again, use some of the conditioning that we have that sometimes works against us and turn it for us.
So what is habit bundling?
So we pair something that you need to do with something that you want to do.
This makes the less appealing task actually more attractive because it's bundled with an immediate reward, leveraging that dopamine anticipation that we talked about.
So the formula is kind of like, Like, only after I need to do something, so insert the thing that you need to do, only after I do the thing that I need to do, can I do the thing that I want to do.
Some examples here, just to make it real for you.
Only after I finish that challenging report, can I listen to my favorite podcast. The podcast becomes the immediate reward for completing the difficult task.
Another example. Only after I do 10 push -ups, can I check social media.
So you're leveraging a common craving, social media, to get a quick burst of movement.
Only after I clean the kitchen can I watch my favorite show.
So the desire for entertainment, the thing you want to do, right, motivates the chore.
Only after I review my budget for 15 minutes can I buy that new item that I have been wanting.
So these are examples.
Why does this actually work?
What we're doing is we're going back to that circuit again that we talked about.
You're leveraging the dopamine hit of the desired activity to motivate you through the less desired one.
You're creating an immediate tangible reward for completing the task that serves your future self -project.
And this makes the necessary tasks feel kind of less like obligations and more like stepping stones to something enjoyable.
It's funny because I do this at night.
My wife Stephanie and I will kind of go.
we'll find our spots on the couch and drop into the latest episode.
But before that, I feel like I kind of earn it by cleaning up the kitchen and doing the dishes.
And I don't hate doing that, but it's not the funnest thing for me.
But that's the behavior that I need to do to almost like make myself eligible for the one that I want to do.
So another strategy, let's call this a fourth strategy.
And that is what we call the art of the the daily and weekly review.
So think about a big picture.
Building a house requires regular inspections and adjustments.
Your life design is no different.
This isn't about judgment, but about gentle course correction and really celebrating progress.
It's about creating feedback loops that inform your next iterations.
So the idea here is that consistent short periods of reflection help you stay aligned with your future self -project, with that vision of who who you want to become and how you want to be in the world and really identify what's working with your habits and make any necessary adjustments.
And what this does is it prevents small misalignments from drifting and drifting and drifting without being caught, without being adjusted and turning into major detours.
So what might this look like?
Let's think about it in terms of a daily review.
This takes maybe five, 10 minutes tops.
tops. Typically at the end of your workday or day or before bed, that's easier.
That's when we do it, right?
So what do we actually do?
Kind of like a quick mental check -in or a brief written reflection in a journal.
If that just feels better to you.
Some people love to think it through.
Some people literally will talk it out in spoken word. Some people will jot it down in journal or notes app.
And here are the questions you want to ask.
What went well today?
What was challenging?
lunging? What's one thing I learned about myself or my habits today?
How did my actions today support or not support my future self vision?
And what's one small thing I can do tomorrow to make it better?
Again, you don't have to write this down.
It'll all be in the PDF.
So just kind of follow along for now.
So why do we do this?
Because we're looking to integrate the the day's learnings and really clear your mind of lingering tasks or thoughts.
We want to acknowledge small wins and set a kind of a gentle intentional tone for the next day.
And it really helps you close out the day mindfully.
And I found for me as a side benefit that by almost channeling this out of my brain and onto paper, sometimes I'll even do this literally as a voice memo, that it lets me sleep or go to sleep more easily because they're just, I know that whatever is in there, it was kind of recorded.
I've dropped it out into a different place.
So that's a daily review, like five, 10 minutes, end of the day.
I think it can also be helpful to do a weekly review.
And sometimes this is a bit longer.
Think, you know, like 30 to 60 minutes, half hour to an hour or so.
A great time to do this is on a Sunday morning or whatever sort of a break day might be for you, or at the start of the end of your work week, wherever that or however that lands.
So what do you actually do here?
It's a more comprehensive look at the past week and proactive planning for the next.
And this can be done in a notebook, it can be a digital planner, even just a quiet walk.
You know, like go grab whatever it is where you like to write stuff, go find a really sweet spot.
I love to actually go sit outside or on my front porch. and the questions that you might ask when doing this are did my daily habits align with that future self vision this week where was i in flow where did i feel resistance um what were my biggest wins this week no matter how small where did i feel drained or stuck and what were the culprits you know what was the cause of it people activities environments what's one small adjustment i can make to my environment routine next week to better support my vision?
And based on my future self project, that vision that we have, what are my top one to three priorities for the coming week that will move me closer to that vision?
And then finally, what do I need to release or say no to next week to create more space to invite the good stuff in, the possibility stuff in?
So these are kind of like adaptations of the daily, but they're more expansive.
offensive so you want to take a little bit more time to do them i've been doing a version of this and actually um sharing it with two other friends we do this so like on a sunday morning together and then share what we write i want to say for about a decade now um and you know even though i think we were doing it initially for in part for accountability to hold each other accountable i still do it now whether they look at it or not simply because it really helps me process the week week that was, you know, just behind me and orient and be intentional about the week that I want to step into and make
happen. The idea here is to really celebrate the wins, learn from setbacks without judgment, proactively design the next week to be more aligned and effective and ensure that that inner architect is continuously refining the blueprint for that future self that we want to inhabit, that we want to act into existence, right?
Right? So let's talk about some bigger examples here.
I'll share a couple of stories to illustrate the principle sort of like end to end.
One from my own and one actually from a recent conversation with a friend.
So we'll talk about a writing routine for me or writing habits.
So for years, I told myself I wanted to write more.
I'm a writer, like I'm somebody who writes regularly.
I've written a number of books, but they're not also large windows of time where I just haven't been writing.
And I told myself that I just wanted to write more.
I had ideas bubbling, but the act of doing it, of getting them out of my head and through my fingers and onto the paper or the page or the screen and the file, doing it felt like pulling teeth for a certain amount of time.
And I'd sit down, I'd stare at a blank screen, I get distracted by emails, I get sucked into social media.
And then I feel pretty bad about myself and pretty guilty.
I'm not the only one.
My future self project, it really included a version of me who was more consistent with my writing, a joyful creator, someone who expressed ideas freely and consistently and was just pouring writing and beautiful writing out of me.
But my current habits, they just weren't supporting that.
And my willpower, just no. It was constantly being depleted just by the sheer effort of starting.
And it's just not a good thing to lean on when life gets really complicated also or there's the other stressors or things taking your attention.
I tried to kind of muscle my way through it.
I would block out two hours, tell myself I had to write.
This is the time. It just just rarely worked.
And then I really started thinking about environment design and micro habits.
And what I realized was that my cue was often a cluttered desk and my routine was getting distracted by emails.
And my reward for writing was, it was just too far off, too abstract, like, oh, maybe there'll be a book in two or three years.
So kind of like every part of the habit habit loop was broken for me.
So I redesigned it.
First, the environment, I created a dedicated writing zone in my office, literally a corner of my couch that was only for writing.
It's kind of like a sacred space.
No email, no social media on that screen.
I'd physically turn on my computer.
Um, you know, I'd put my phone in another room or I'd use an app that literally made it.
So I And that made the cue part clearer and reduced distraction.
It was a physical boundary that signaled this is for writing.
And this is the time for writing.
Then what about the micro habit, the sort of like part in the middle?
Well, here's where it got really interesting.
Like I have written for years and I have written for often hours or days at a time, but I was trying to do that at that point and it just wasn't working anymore.
So I shortened it dramatically.
Grammatically, I started with the micro habit of saying, I'm just going to start writing for five minutes.
That is my only commitment, five minutes of writing, not an hour, just five minutes.
My rule was after I finished my first cup of coffee in the morning, I'll open my writing document and write for five minutes.
That was my habit stack.
The cue was the coffee, right?
And I had the visual reminder of having a convenient writing place, removing the friction.
introduction, the routine was five simple minutes of writing.
Now the reward, not necessarily a brilliant reward here, but it was just the feeling of having started for me, of having honored my intention.
And that small hit of dopamine that the tiny accomplishment gave me, like, yeah, I did that.
And it was easy to do because it was only five minutes.
I was able to give myself that reward with just five minutes of effort.
The immediate reward, the fact that it it wasn't months or years off.
It was the feeling of progress of showing up.
And the fact that I could feel it right away, it kind of made the habit loop so much more effective.
So what actually happened, most days I would sit there and I would actually do the behavior.
And then what started happening over time is really interesting.
And I've seen this happen in so many different things.
Those five minutes turned into 10 minutes and then turned into 20 minutes, sometimes a half an hour, or sometimes writing all day because the hardest part, at least for me, is often just starting.
And by making this start frictionless, having that visual cue and anchoring it to a behavior before it, like we talked about, I was able to bypass the need for willpower or grit or any of those things that really don't work.
And at the same time, the RAS or the reticular activating system that we talked about in last week's episode in our brain, that part of the brain that orients your attention and filters non -relevant inputs, it also kicked in.
When I was looking for ideas, my brain was just primed to notice them throughout the day.
It wasn't about forcing it.
It was about designing a system that made writing a natural part of my day and aligning that with my future self who was a consistent, joyful creator.
So this is still a practice, but it's no longer a slog.
It's not a battle. It's not something that I dread or I'm trying to figure out, I feel stuck around, it's just become sort of like a sense of ease, a sense of flow.
It's just become something I do.
I'll talk about another kind of like fun example here based on a conversation I recently had with a friend.
I was talking to her last month, busy professional, a mom.
And I kind of talked her through her own mid -year reset, just like I did as I started this series.
And then her version of a future self -project, the visioning type of of exercises we talked about last week.
And they revealed that she was really feeling constantly exhausted and disconnected from her body when she was doing the reset assessment.
And then when she stepped into the future self -visioning part of it, it really included a version of herself who felt vibrant and energized and present, someone who moved her body joyfully.
But her mornings were often the exact opposite, chaos.
Exercise felt like another impossible chore.
She had tried to commit to hour long gym sessions or classes that just never stuck.
And she decided that, okay, so what am I going to do about this?
Well, let's talk about the habit loops that we're talking about here, that her morning habit would be morning movement.
But instead of aiming for an hour long gym session, which wasn't happening, and even the thought of it was like negative reinforcement, like I just don't want to do that.
And I don't have time to do it.
So instead of doing that, just like we talked about, she replaced that with a micro behavior.
She started small. Her initial rule was after I put the coffee on the, or after I turn on the coffee maker, I will do five minutes of stretching in the living room.
That was it. That's what we engineered.
Five minutes. She didn't even change into workout clothes or anything like that.
Just whatever she was wearing.
And no, it wasn't burpees, which would have likely been so aggressive.
it never would have happened.
It was gentle. It was accessible, stretching.
And she also implemented a small bit of environment design here to support this behavior and this habit.
She put her yoga mat rolled out in the living room the night before, right?
So she could actually see it visually and she removed the friction to doing the behavior.
It was literally almost harder not to do it than to do it.
So the cue was the morning, morning, the coffee maker, right?
It became the anchor.
The routine was five minutes of stretching.
She removed the friction from having to do that.
The reward was just the subtle feeling of accomplishment and a gentle awakening of her body that feels like, oh, I mean, if you've ever done like just regular stretching, like you do five or 10 minutes and you're like, my body really feels good.
It feels so much better.
The dopamine hit came from the anticipation of that gentle stretch and the immediate feeling of having started her day with intention rather than chaos and reactivity.
So what happened? Similar to my experience with writing, within a few weeks, five minutes became 10, 10 became 20, and then half an hour, and then started to open the door to yoga videos.
Eventually she found herself craving a longer walk after dropping off the kids at school and energy level soared.
Just felt more present, patient throughout the day.
And she was like, it wasn't about the exercise itself at first. It was about just proving to herself that she could start.
And once she started, everything else kind of became easier.
That little five minutes was the foundation for so much more.
It kind of reminds me, a million years ago, I was a personal trainer in New York City.
And I used to work out with my clients often in Central Park early in the morning.
And I had this one client.
And I would literally run the loop in Central Park with him, which was six miles, which is pretty funny because I am so not a runner.
And I got there one morning at 6 AM and I'm kind of waiting for him, stretching out a little.
My eyes are a little blurry.
He comes running up and he gets there and he's standing next to me.
He just starts laughing.
And I'm like, what are you laughing at?
And he's like, honestly, like you could just go home now.
And it was the fact that the fact that he knew he had the commitment, the fact that he had laid out his shoes and he was all prepared and he was out the door.
he had his coffee in the morning, and then he came to the park and I was there and he had set everything up, he was automatically just going to do the behavior at that point, right?
Because he had already initiated and made everything leading up to it so much easier.
So these stories, I think they really show how tiny well -placed habits, supported by intelligent environment design, can create massive ripples, building the very foundations of your desired future.
Tiny actions, tiny behaviors compounded over time leads to a beautifully designed, fully expressed life.
But I want to talk about one other thing that I think complements these tiny behaviors and habits really nicely.
And that's the notion of cultivating flow states.
That's the flow part of this episode.
It's the second part of the title is flow here.
So what exactly is flow?
And how do these foundations and habits contribute to it?
Well, flow is that incredible state of being completely absorbed, focused, immersed in an activity.
Time seems to disappear, self -consciousness fades, and you feel this deep sense of enjoyment and effortlessness and engagement.
Even if you're working hard, it's often described as being in the zone.
So whether you're an artist, painting, a programmer, coding, musician, performer, even just deeply engaged in a conversation or a challenging puzzle, you have likely experienced flow.
And the concept was really popularized by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, who dedicated his life to studying optimal human experience.
And he found that flow occurs where there's a really beautiful balance between the challenge of a task and your skill level and the lack of distractions and your ability to actually do the thing.
If the challenge is too low, you get bored.
If it's too high, you get anxious.
But right in that sweet spot, bot, you enter flow.
And there are incredible benefits to being in a flow state.
Increased productivity.
When you're in flow, you are incredibly efficient and effective.
Enhanced learning. You absorb information and skills more readily.
Greater enjoyment and fulfillment.
Flow experiences are just inherently rewarding and contribute to overall happiness and meaning in life.
Often people report reduced stress because being fully immersed in an activity, it just It just leaves little room for worries and distractions.
So this is a state that has so many benefits.
We wanna be in it as often as we can.
So how do habits and foundations then work with this concept of flow?
You might be thinking, well, that sounds great, but how do I make myself get into flow?
And here's the beautiful connection to habits, right?
With habits, we have a reduced cognitive load.
So when you've automated the foundational elements of your day through habits, you free up mental energy and willpower and you're not constantly deciding what to do next or battling resistance.
And this reduced cognitive load creates the mental space necessary for deep focus and immersion.
So if your morning routine is automatic, your brain isn't expending energy on that, leaving more for creative or challenging tasks, leaving more room to step into flow.
flow. Second thing that tends to happen is really clearing cues for deep work.
So by designing your environment and using habit stacking or habit bundling, you can create clear cues that signal to your brain, now is the time for deep focused work that could lead to flow.
For example, my writing zone and the five minute after coffee habit, they're cues that often usher me into a deep flow state while I start writing.
Third piece of this where they intersect, you know, like habit and flow is in skill development.
So flow often happens when you're challenged just enough.
Consistent habits build skills.
So the more you practice a craft or task when it becomes consistent through consistent habits, the better you get at it, the more proficient you become.
And as your skills grow, you can take on slightly more challenging tasks, continually finding that sweet spot for flow while you're working at higher and higher levels.
Another Another place of intersection here is by minimizing distractions.
So as we've talked about, our environment design strategies, making distractions invisible and removing friction, they're crucial for flow.
Flow requires uninterrupted focus.
And if your phone is constantly buzzing, or your email is pinging, or there are all sorts of other distractions or things that you have to do, you'll be pulled out of that immersive state.
So think about a musician here.
They don't just pick up an instrument and immediately experience flow.
They practice scales, that's the habit.
They learn the chords, that's a habit.
They set up their practice space, that's environmental design.
All of these foundational habits, they build the skill and create the conditions for those moments when they lose themselves completely in the music.
The same applies to your future self project, that vision of yourself that you would love to make real.
If your future self is calm and present, and your habits around mindful presence and putting away distractions will then create more moments of flow in your interactions with you, with your family, with those around you.
If your future self is a prolific creator maybe, your disciplined writing or art habits will lead to more moments of creative flow.
So that's how these things all speak together.
So what do we do with all this?
this? How do we wrap this all up in a bundle?
So the pursuit of a meaningful life, it isn't a grand abstract quest that happens somewhere out there, right?
That's not what we're working towards in this inner architect.
We're sort of like working on the inner architect to create that future self, that future life that we want, right?
It's not something that's just external to us.
It's built brick by brick by intentional brick.
In the quiet moments of your day, it's built by the choices that you make a hundred, a thousand times a day.
It's built by the habits that you cultivate and the environment that you design.
It's how you move from simply dreaming about your future self to actually living as that person day by day, moment by moment until it becomes your reality and your identity.
So this week, I want to leave you with a call to action and that is to take your future self project, that vision we created last week and start laying its foundation conversation consciously designing for more action and flow using the ideas and the tools and the strategies we've talked about here.
Identify an anchor habit.
What's the one small consistent action that would create the biggest positive ripple effect towards your future self, make it tiny and easy.
Remember, design your environment.
So how can you make that anchor habit and other desired behavior just obvious and easy?
Make it so that you can see them and that you removed all the friction?
How can you make undesirable behaviors invisible and hard?
Get creative, play with this a little bit, have a little bit of fun here.
Three, experiment with habit bundling.
Can you link new habits to existing ones?
Can you pair something that you need to do with something you want to do?
Four, implement a mini daily review.
So take five to 10 minutes at the end of each day to really reflect what went well, what was challenging?
What's one small adjustment for tomorrow?
And then see if you can explore more opportunities to drop into flow.
As you implement these habits, pay attention to moments when you feel really truly absorbed and energized.
And notice what conditions led to that.
How can you create more of them?
Remember, this is not about perfection.
It's about progress.
It's about making small, consistent deposits into the bank account of your future self.
It's about building the architecture of a life that truly supports your deepest desires, a life where you can experience more moments of effortless engagement, and just profound joy and fulfillment.
So next week, we're going to build on this, right?
We have our final episode as we wrap up this summer series.
We'll zoom out again because building your meaningful life isn't a one -time project.
It is a continuous act of creation and we'll explore a certain state of mind, a mentality on how to embrace continuous learning, adapt gracefully to change and keep growing through every season of life.
It's about really sustaining the incredible momentum that you're already building and seeing your life as this ever evolving work of art.
So until then everyone, everyone, keep living your good life and keep building one intentional day at a time.
I'll see you next week.
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