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Right now I am listening to The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix and I just cannot get enough of it.
I never want to pause it.
I'm literally like loading the dishwasher listening to it, on the treadmill listening to it constantly.
It's so awesome. I love being able to listen anytime, anywhere I want to.
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I am absolutely obsessed with a sweet treat after dinner, and my favorite sweet treat right now is my mochi.
It's mine, not yours.
Just kidding, you can have some too.
This is a cool, creamy scoop of ice cream wrapped in a soft, chewy dough.
It's like a sweet little ice cream dumpling or ravioli.
I'm obsessed. It's pillowy.
It's satisfying. I feel indulged.
I just love it so much. I really am obsessed with the strawberry flavor right now.
My mochi is only around 70 calories per piece, which like hello, that's amazing.
My mochi is gluten -free and each box has six perfectly portioned mochi snacks.
Do I eat two a night?
Yeah, yeah, I do because they're that good.
And guess what? My mochi is the number one mochi ice cream in the U .S. of A.
The strawberry flavor is bursting with fresh picked fruit flavor that tastes incredibly refreshing.
I love love love them after dinner.
This August look for the purple box of my mochi ice cream at your local grocery store and feel joyfully chill with the coolest treat around my mochi.
Okay you guys went ham sandwich and ordered so many lunar dials in the in the pre -sale there like I was like oh my god you became entire ham ham hoagies is what you what's a ham hoagie what is that isn't it like a sub but somewhere else they call them hoagies oh a sub is a hoagie yeah I thought I was gonna say a hub is a sogy well I don't know all I know is that the motherfucking lunar dial is going to be available on the Wondery Shop starting August 1st. www .wonderyshop .com.
And that's starting August 1st. But if you're not one for the internet, that's fine.
Because you can go out into the world.
This is my favorite part.
And you can go to some of my fucking favorite places.
Hell yeah. Target. Target.
Barnes and Noble. Barnes and Noble.
And Amazon starting August 1st. and you can buy it there baby play the game play it play it so hard go get it you bunch of hoagies starting in august august hey weirdos i'm ash and i'm elena and this is morbid this is morbid that was ai generated i liked that oh no no no no never literally never we're not those kind of people we're not those kind of girlies we're not robots we're not robots robots over here sometimes i little feel i little i feel a little robotic uh -oh you glitched everybody's like caught you that probably hurt your ear sorry that probably did yeah uh i was just saying speaking
of ai or or maybe just like or maybe just you know social media listening to you oh wait i didn't mean to interrupt you but i'm i'm doing that you did you meant to i just did to my shirt can you guys see that it's wild what she did to her i put a hole in it by accident she did she put a whole asshole into her shirt damn it okay sims you're feral uh but yeah we were we were saying how uh tiktok listens to you and apparently according to ash i've been talking about the sims a lot because i keep getting sims content all of a sudden and i'm not mad about it no what what is sims content uh just people
showing you their sims builds and also showing you funny things that happen in the game okay because there's a lot of glitches that happen in the sims that are hilarious and there's also a lot of like hidden places you can go and hidden things you can do like creepy or like like fun things like you can like is this go inside of a of a tree a fairy tree and go to like a fairy realm that's like a hidden fairy realm i feel like your kids would love that oh yeah is the sims ever scary scary like do like bad things happen i never i can literally never play that's wild to me i used to watch you it can be
very unintentionally scary because glitches happen and they can be terrifying sometimes like how so like give me an example like a horse apparently one of the new glitches there's like a new expansion thing out i guess i don't have this one but i saw a tiktok about it crazy but one it's like horse ranch is the thing so you can like have a horse ranch and the horses like bend over backwards like walk at you like these crazy like a demon it's like a glitch in the game i feel like that's not a glitch i feel like that's just like somebody in the office bored on the thursday probably wow yeah that's
crazy it's pretty fun that's the sims is fun gotta say every i think a lot of people agree with me i know a lot of people a lot of you play the sims i know this because whenever i've mentioned it before i post something people you know what else people play a lot that i've never played and i don't think you've ever played it either animal crossing i've never played that do you remember during the panoramic when um animal crossing just like took over the nation no everyone everyone was buying um the nintendo switch that's oh i didn't even know that which drew wants to buy one and i was was like
i don't know like i don't know gamer boy i don't know i'm not a i'm not a huge gamer i'm not a gamer girl i got i was a sims gamer girly yeah and i do love a horror video game sometimes but i haven't played one in like a billion years because you know when but i'm not and i never have been a video game girly like remember when papa and i was sick and he got me me those computer games the hobbit he got me the hobbit and like an aerial game which i fucking loved the aerial game because you just like put clothes on her yeah like it was like styling aerial and i was like sign me up but then the hobbit
i was like do you know me sir but who took the hobbit game i gave that right to her she was like can i play this and i was like yeah i get it the fuck away from me and this bitch over here spent that i was actually just talking about this recently i was telling drew about it we were talking i think it was when we were talking about the nintendo thing yep but i was like elena overtook this fucking game and i passed the point of me being sick i was cured at this point oh yeah you just thriving you were on level after level after level that game ruled and i want to play it again that it was a cool
game it was a cool game because i remember at that point when you started playing i was like could i play now and you're like no i was like no i've always been no but it's hard when we had a computer room yeah that's a wild computer room was a thing it's a wild thing to think about and the computer used to scare me i'm on papa's house why did it scare you it's a freaky ass room do you remember that room i mean yeah like the the weird side closet and shit i think that room was my room at one point that room was also my room at one i think it was everybody's room at some point we all like love to
switch rooms all the time yeah but yeah i think that was my room at one point was that like your childhood room no it was when i was like a teenager and i was like i want this cool little room to myself and then I was like I don't like this room yeah that room's honestly that room's too small to be like a room room truly room people like the same the way we say room oh yeah I've heard people say that I don't people say room I don't think I'd say it differently we say room room like room and other people say room like this is my room wait people say room like room Rune.
This is my rune. It reminds me of rune.
It reminds me of rune on No More Girls.
I think they say or do they say rum?
Rum? We say rum. This is, we're losing all They're like, who cares what I say.
That's not what we came for.
Well, that was rums, rooms, and video games for you all.
That was rums, rooms, and runes with Ash and Elena.
Yay. I like that. But you know what, this is This is a spooky crazy episode.
Spooky crazy. So it makes sense that we're being spooky and crazy leading up to it.
This case was particularly asked for by Dave. By Dave. Our research assistant, Dave. My best friend.
We love a Dave. We love Dave. It is the Smurl family haunting.
And Dave was like, this is a goodie.
And I was like, wow, so many wild things happen in this that like, oh, my God.
And you know what? But with a name like Smurl's, it has to be good.
That's one of the things that I thought.
That's one of the things that I thought.
All right, so the story of the haunting really gained traction on August 19th, 1996.
Oh, in the 80s. It was very 80s.
But on August 19th, 1986, that was when a rather interesting news story appeared in the Wilkes -Barre Times -Leader.
And the article was written about the Smurl family home in West Pitson, Pennsylvania, and the smurl family home was owned by jack and janet smurl jack and janet jack and janet but they claimed that's their that that's their couple songs i was gonna say that's their theme song jack and janet smurl they claimed that for a period of about a year and a half that they had been the victims of a truly insane haunt they said their home was infested with ghosts wandering the halls they were tormenting the family dog demons were attacking the kids in the house they were allegedly sexually assaulting the adults
in the house oh no it was a truly wild story from start to finish apparently apparently apparently i thought you said infested by goats at first too to be honest but then i i took the context clues later that was a pretty good impersonation i I thought it was a goat that just walked in here, but it was just Ash.
Holler me a goat. I don't know why I just like ummed at you that hard. I appreciate it.
It really like put us into business.
Yeah. I feel like it was like an um, get to business.
So the article. So the article.
In the Times -Leader, it got a lot of attention, and soon reporters from like all over Pennsylvania and even the surrounding states wanted to get an interview with the Smurls.
Oh, of course. This is prime time media, my guy.
Yeah. And the Smurls, they were happy to give one.
but unfortunately during these interviews like people would come to the house sometimes and all activity would cease to exist like they could never show what was going on in the house they could never prove that anything had actually happened i mean yeah even though people couldn't see what had happened with their own eyes the press at first and actually even the church believed the smurls they were like you know i i see what you're saying i don't see it but like i i could see it yeah and like i get that ghosts don't have media training so i understand why they wouldn't come out be a little shy
you know it's okay and i think the thing was like what they were claiming was so wild that the people who believed them were like they couldn't possibly make this up yeah like this would be a reckless thing to make up exactly but after a while though people were like the lack of proof is really kind of like tugging at us and start people started started questioning whether or not they had really experienced any kind of haunt at all oh boy so this one from like full -blown hell yeah smurls i'm so sorry you're going through that to like what the fuck are you talking like are you lying yeah so people
just started to talk the whole thing up to a hoax that was created by the family for like attention and fame and they eventually lost interest but who knows maybe like something really did happen we don't really know maybe so So let's get into the story, and let's get into the key people involved.
We got John James Jack.
John James Jack. So that's Jack Smurl.
He was born December 19, 1942, in Wilkes Bar, Pennsylvania, to his parents, John and Mary.
He was the younger of two kids.
And looking back, he said that he actually had a pretty ideal childhood.
Spent a lot of time outside with friends.
they would you know go exploring they'd play sports they'd adventure through the woods in the area yeah i literally wrote you know side note isn't it fucking wild that kids just used to go off and play in the woods yeah i used to play in the woods you used to play in the woods yeah in the 80s they played in the well yeah i guess you grew up in more than 90s yeah it was like late 80s early 90s we would play in the woods i didn't even know that you played in the woods i was gonna say we were talking to ma about that recently and she would play in the woods oh yeah Yeah, the woods was the shit before
everybody came and made it awful.
I know. We went to like woods parties in high school, but we never like played in the woods.
So technically you played in the woods.
Quote unquote. Yeah, you're not wrong.
But wow. Yeah. But overall though, Jack, he was said to be a really easygoing kid.
He was smart, got along with his peers, and everybody in high school really liked him.
And he went to a Catholic high school in Wilkes Bar called St. Mary's.
Now, even though he did well in school and he was clearly a pretty smart kid after he graduated from high school jack was kind of just done with the whole school thing which is some people are relatable but he wanted to he just wanted like some kind of excitement he wanted a big adventure and he wanted to go see more of the world than just pennsylvania where he lived yeah so in the early 60s pretty much uh the best way to guarantee traveling was to join the military so that's what jack did and he served in the navy from june of 1960 until his honorable discharge in 1965 so he got a lot of travel
time under his belt look at him and it turned out that his personality the fact that he was a worker like he had a strong work ethic and he was very attentive to rule following it made him an excellent serviceman so he did really well during his navy years and while he was enlisted he trained as an i'm gonna try this electroconclusive therapy technician it was more intimidating than i thought but it turned out that was another thing he was really good at and he was naturally empathetic and had like a lot of compassion when it came to people struggling with their mental health so this work was just
as rewarding as his time in the navy was now once he was discharged he had big dreams of settling down wanted to get married wanted to start a family and it just so happened that during his time in the navy he had met a girl named janet oh i know her i do too he thought she would be the perfect girl to eventually marry.
He was a little bit older and Janet was in high school when they met.
But despite the age difference, Jack and Janet hit it off immediately.
Janet was very into school.
She was kind of like a bookworm.
Robert Curran, who wrote The Haunted, One Family's Nightmare, put it that Janet, quote, had no interest in the drugs or promiscuity favored by the hippie movement.
Oh, yeah. Fuck those people.
Fuck the hippies, a .k .a.
my people. so Janet was not like that and neither was Jack so that's why they kind of mesh so well together you know those photos sitting in your phone the ones that make you smile every time you scroll past them well at smallwoodhome .com they believe that you deserve better than that Smallwood home transforms your favorite memories into stunning gallery quality artwork that tells your story.
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Now, their initial meeting was actually pretty brief, but Jack just couldn't get Janet off of his mind as he finished his ears on the service.
So he was really thrilled when they met up again end by happenstance at the 1967 company christmas party for tops chewing gum um they actually both worked there but in different departments oh wow and they didn't realize it until they met at the christmas party oh shit so it kind of seems like they were like meant to be a little bit go to those holiday parties guys i used to fucking love my company's holiday party some of them are fun some of them are fun so like jack janet she was also raised a devout catholic so they had similar morals and values and they bonded over those and like i said their
personalities just really seemed to complement each other's so they dated for one year and then they decided to get married in this massive catholic ceremony um looking back on their relationship janet said i think i knew right away i really liked the way he presented himself and the respect he had not just for me but all the things i valued i like the way you move that's really sweet i think she was like i like god and you do too and the church is awesome and we like it together you know same thing morals they were like omg omg morals have those me too yeah we love those yeah so jack and janet
weren't the couple like out and about at parties they weren't joining in on protests that a lot of people their age were joining in on at this time period but they were just you know readying themselves to make a family jack said vibing they were just vibing making plans for a fam am and jack said we both wanted a family and we both wanted to make sure that the family would be raised properly just good old catholic folk okay so the early years of jack and janet's marriage went really well it was particularly pleasant jack was ever the hard worker he got a promotion and a pay raise and by the end
of the 60s janet had given birth to the couple's two daughters don and heather which i think are really pretty names yeah don and heather yeah now janet had had left work to be a full -time mom and she said she saw it as not only quote her sacred responsibility but a privilege as well that's cute so she really loved being a mom now as a young couple with two children support to support excuse me it wasn't always easy to make ends meet on one income so the family ended up moving in with jack's parents john and mary smurl into their house in wilkes bar now living with jack's parents but jack's parents
that's hard to say and it makes you feel like you're saying yeah yeah it is hard jack's parents jack's parents it's because of the two s's also how biblical biblical of them is what i meant to say john and mary i didn't for some reason that didn't that didn't hit before good old catholic folk you know just just hit yep you know i was like oh bible exactly and then we got john and janet yeah Yeah.
Janet from the Bible.
Janet from the Bible.
You know that? I don't know.
Janet from the Bible.
Why is that so funny?
Janet was at the Last Supper, right?
I think. She was one of them.
Wasn't that, like, Only Men?
Who knows? I don't fucking know.
I think it was dudes.
Probably. I think it was a guy's night.
I think it was dudes just being bros.
It was Saturday. It was for the boys.
So they move in with John and Mary.
Not the Christ kind, but the other ones.
living with jack's parents meant that he and janet could save money to buy their own house and they also had john and mary around to help with the with the kids so that was an added bonus the kids little chicken do's little chickadees chickenettes but unfortunately the plan hit a major snag in the summer of 1972 when hurricane agnes swept through the east coast hurricane Hurricane Agnes.
Bitch. Sounds like a bitch. She was a bitch. Like my grandmother's name was Agnes.
So I'm allowed to say that.
My great grandmother's name was Agnes.
But she was apparently awesome though.
Yeah, she was the tits.
I didn't get to meet her.
But like, I don't know.
A hurricane Agnes feels like she means business.
Yeah, she does. Sorry if you heard that.
Like you don't come in being like, hello, I'm hurricane Agnes.
I'm just going to rain a little bit.
Yeah, no, you look like you fuck shit up.
Yeah, you fuck shit up.
And she did, actually.
actually the storm caused billions of dollars in damage and it actually on a more serious note it actually killed over a hundred people i didn't even know i have to look up this storm i didn't know that i hadn't heard of it either actually because i think the first major hurricane in my life i think was hurricane bob i think it was on the east coast um the one that sticks out to me the most is ida but she may have been recently i think she was recent i'm pretty sure i don't know i get them confused but hurricane agnes i have not heard of i'll have to look it up neither either but so the so it
was a really devastating hurricane for the area but luckily the smurls they were lucky in the sense that they didn't suffer nearly as much property damage as others did and they were actually able to fix much of the damage but what did happen to them was that the house was actually seized by the city through eminent domain oh shit isn't that isn't that when like they can turn it into like a hospital or they can turn it into something they They can turn it into like something for the city.
Now, that's the thing.
I was like, I'm not really sure how all of that works.
But Dave thought that the property was so ruined that they were probably tearing down the area and redeveloping.
So the city kind of like took it back.
Wow. That's wild. But either way, now the family was forced to find a new home that could accommodate the entire Smurl family, Jack's parents included.
Yeah. So that's six people.
That's a lot of people to have to find shelter for.
Exactly. now luckily though it actually didn't take long for jack and janet to find exactly what they were looking for in a duplex at 330 chase street in the small town of west pits in pennsylvania about half hour outside of scranton scranton i literally wrote q elena office reference here you know no i don't know you all know i wasn't talking to you i was talking to everyone else i know you don't know is that me at jess's no it's you jim what don't worry about it so in 1973 when the smurls bought the house west pitson it really seemed to be like the perfect area for them the town was filled with a lot
of hard -working young people a lot like jack and janet and most of them were like working class people again just like jack and janet so once they moved moved in they wasted no time getting settled and as the quintessential homemaker stay -at -home mama of two Janet got active in this community which this is impressive actually she worked to establish a girls softball league whoa she joined a local chapter of students again against drunk driving and she spearheaded the town's cherry blossom festival damn Janet which I was like okay Janet oh yeah what's your wig made of all right Janet It I had to
finish what's your wig made of cherry blossoms from the festival I spearheaded That's right now meanwhile Jack was I know seriously he was doing really well too he was moving up the corporate ladder at tops to a middle management position and he joined the local Lions Club damn look at him assistant to the regional manager and everything that's office that is so years later jack and janet they looked back on those early years living in that home on chase street and they actually agreed that they were some of the happiest times in their marriage especially in light of all the chaos that followed
uh oh so when they found their duplex on chase street like i said seemed to have everything they wanted in a home as a duplex it could easily accommodate jack's parents while still having more than enough space for everybody else so actually jack ended up selling his parents their side of the living space for four thousand dollars which would be about twenty five thousand now which like that's a fucking deal on a whole ass home on a whole ass home so when they bought the house jack and janet didn't really know much about the owner all they knew about him was that he was an elderly man who had
been renting the property out for years but otherwise the house passed all the standard inspections and all the major utilities plumbing electric foundation roof yada yada yada they all seemed to be in perfect working order which made the house feel like a steal at just ten thousand dollars damn yeah i forgot to put in the translation of that like what it would be today i could see you were like i want to know how much that is yeah i forgot to put it in it's okay but perhaps there was a reason that it was that cheap perhaps there was i'm ready to find out what it was so the first strange occurrence
anybody in the smurl family can remember actually happened in january of 1974 just a few months after they moved into the house mary had recently bought a large red carpet for her and john's side of the house but when the rug was delivered to the house and rolled out on the floor they were pretty disappointed because right in the middle there was a huge dark stain that uh obviously wasn't there when mary had bought it huh so she was able to get the stain out of the rug she just used like regular old carpet cleaner but a few days later it inexplicably returned in the exact same spot almost like
she had never removed it in the first place huh so they ended up throwing away the carpet and they just didn't think much of it they were like well that was fucking weird but maybe i didn't get all of it like maybe it dried weird you know yeah they were just overall confused about the whole thing but i should say here that the timeline of the smurl family haunt shifts around a lot because it seems like when they first went to the press they said the whole thing lasted about a year and a half but then the timeline shifts again and again throughout the entire story and I think that was part of the reason why
people started to have doubts okay I honestly I think like obviously a real like true haunting where you have this evidence and you catch things on tape and like catch things on you know video and all that that is fascinating and awesome and That's like my favorite kind.
But there's something fascinating about one where you question whether a whole fucking family, including adults, are like shit up.
Yeah. Like there's something so fat because I'm like, you all banded together.
Why did you do this?
Like what a weird thing to fake is a whole haunting.
It's funny that you say that in the way that you did.
I don't know how to like reiterate how you said it but I'm excited to see how that there potentially could be a reason that everybody oh okay and um I should mention that we might not get there until uh part two oh sorry I forgot to tell you that we're beginning spooky season early yeah bitch little kickoff October somewhere yeah you know so while the stain on John and Mary's new carpet seemed relatively innocuous in the timeline that they do later put together it was soon followed by a whole slew of issues in the home that they believed were supernatural forces okay now just a few months after the rug
incident jack said that he was watching the tv one night when suddenly the tv burst into flames without any warning or any sign of a problem you buried that lead i sure did he was just watching tv one night and the television burst into flames he said these ghosts came in like a wrecking ball they never fell so hard they never did they were like hey i'm here like what wow and that's demonic that's pretty demonic that's demonic or you think like that's given dark sided or that's given faulty wiring it's certainly that's sinister wiring is the problem there but so that's the thing jack and janet were like
Like we got some faulty wiring up in this bitch. But then they were like, no, everything passed inspection when we bought the house.
And then that TV fire was followed by other small fires in the house.
Their new electric stove caught fire.
And so did Jack's car days after he brought it home from the dealership.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
Oh my God. There's a fire.
There's an actual fire.
What? Oh my God. Is that demonic?
Oh my God. oh my god oh my god it's giving sinister babe what the fuck what the fuck oh my god oh my god should we leave that in we were just talking about a faulty wire and fire and then there was a fire oh my god I didn't even do any I just stared.
I was just like, oh my god, fire.
I was literally looking at you, and I was just like.
I was like, these, damn, they're getting into this right here.
Fire, fire. And I was like, oh.
I know, why do we continue to yell it in southern accents?
How did that happen?
So that just happened.
Like, not even shitting your dicks right now.
We left that in on purpose.
Yeah. And in the beginning, it kind of sounds like I'm being silly.
No. A fire just happened.
It was not at all. We had it.
what did what happened because you saw it so uh ash was talking about faulty wire and and and i said fire multiple times wow that was sinister and all that and then i had i was just looking at ash because right now you can't see it but i can ash is bathed in rainbow light right now because we have little rainbow things on our day yeah because she's so gay and so i looked and i was like wow she looks she looks so angelic right now in this rainbow bath and so i happened to look look over to my right.
And I said, oh, that, that candle is really, really going.
And then I looked and I was like, oh, that's a bonfire in our room right now.
And it just like lit.
I don't even know what lit on fire.
Was it like the paper underneath?
No. No. Cause we have like a little candle, like, yeah, I guess you would call that like a candle holder.
And I think it just, she just lit on fire.
I don't really know what happened here.
That was so scary. And she was was right next to Baffy aka Baphomet yeah like my little Baphomet statue he was living over there yeah he was like as above let's go but yeah I yeah I don't know what just happened but that was um terrifying that could have been real bad now it was big I wish you guys had seen it like not like massive but I should have got control of my constitution and I should have taken a video of it it while mikey put it out i know mikey saved us all i just want to be i didn't move an actual muscle did not i did not move at all when she says didn't move a muscle she didn't even
uncross her legs from crisscross applesauce no i sure didn't and i just went oh my god oh my god i forgot everything from stop drop it i i got up but all i did was say oh no and stand over mikey while he put it out this is and i i did open the door did you just like it yeah i i blew really hard yeah i was burnt my beard oh my god i'm glad you didn't burn your beard okay but uh yeah that just happened so that was interesting i'm glad we could take you guys along for that ride but we're okay now well it smells a little crispy in here but we're all right it smells like good though yeah it's like
crispy candle it's bonfire it's a bonfire that just makes me think of a Childish Campino but I'm not gonna sing that so anyways so anyway oh anyways Donald Glover no I'm just kidding um so yeah fire at the Smurl residence cars electric stoves TVs the whole nine but to the Smurls the first few unfortunate events in their home they just kind of dismissed them as like surprise this is what what makes me lol they dismissed it as surprises that come along with being first -time homeowners yeah when I became a first -time homeowner my car didn't burst into flames nor did my television no so like i wouldn't
chalk that up no it definitely didn't happen to me either but you know everyone's experience is different i suppose it is wow it really does smell crispy in here it does but anyway some of the issues like you know wiring if that was the case leaky plumbing those things probably could have been the result of them buying a house with a pretty long history of unknown repairs yeah so they chalked it up to that for for a minute i see why you don't want to immediately assume it is you know the dark lord yeah no i never want to go in with assumptions that it's the dark lord i would like to avoid that at all
costs i can understand but here's the thing there was all see continuance to avoid the dark lord sorry baffy there was also the fact that when these smell problems would come up usually it was jack or john his father that would fix them And neither of them had any handyman experience, really.
So that could have led to more issues.
But John and Janet, they eventually became convinced that there was a lot more to it.
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needs sydney and blanche are eating the farmer's dog right now and we absolutely love it what's really fun is each packet has their name on it so it says blanche's food sydney's food which is just fun they love it they can't read but i kind of pretend that they do maybe they can't maybe they can't who am i to say get 50 off your first box of fresh healthy food at the farmers dog .com slash morbid plus you get free shipping just go to the farmers dog .com slash morbid to get 50 60 % off that's thefarmersdog .com slash morbid after they had installed a new sink and tub into their bathroom they described
it as looking quote as if the talons of some frenzied beast had clawed at the porcelain oh but maybe they had just scratched it all up during the installation maybe or maybe it was the talons of a frenzied beast i don't know you don't know i don't know i wasn't there that's the thing so a lot of the unfortunate events in the beginning in the early years could be chalked up to you know poor craftsmanship and shoddy work but that kind of explanation would not cover the sudden change in behavior of the smurl's oldest daughter dawn in 1975 she started regularly going into her parents room in the middle
of the night and telling them that she had quote just seen people floating around her room Oh.
Now, each time they would go into her room and look around, but find nothing out of the ordinary.
They didn't see people floating.
Unfortunately, no. No. Or maybe fortunately for them, but like I would find that unfortunate.
Yeah. I'd be like, what a bummer.
I'd be like, you just said you saw floating people.
Don't bullshit me. Fake.
Don't fake. Fake fan.
But almost every night, Dawn would come back and say the same thing.
And she wasn't on acid.
She was like a child.
I was going to say, and she was like a child.
She's a child. So for the most part, the unusual and inexplicable things that happened in the Smurl House, they were just minor inconveniences, disruptions in their ordinary lives.
Lots of, like, random noises.
Radios would turn on by themselves.
Drawers would open and close.
They would hear footsteps up and down the halls in the middle of the night.
None of those things seemed to have explanations.
And whenever they would happen, Jack, Janet, and the kids, they would usually just ignore them because they were kind of getting used to it.
and it became much easier in 1977 when janet gave birth to twin girls shannon and karen i believe or karen i think it's karen sorry um so at this point the family had their hands full so the noises were not something they were focusing on yeah now there's like two screaming now it's noisy yeah it's noisy so you know like by the 70s and the 80s jack janet and the parents they were all so busy with like the babies and just like other life things going on that they weren't bothering with every little irritation or like footstep that would happen yeah but that would start to change in 1983 when the couple
noticed an inescapable quote stench of smoke and rotten meat that seemed to permeate the house no matter what they did oh imagine if your house just smelled like smoke and rotten meat damn and like no no febreze no incense no flammable candle i was just gonna say right now it smells like smoking here but not rotten but not rotten meat they couldn't do anything to fix it and later jack would claim that the first time he noticed the stench was quote while he was kneeling before his bed saying the rosary so it was almost like some kind of demon didn't like some demon saying cut that shit out cut
that shit out i don't like that rosary of yours it's very demon -y but at the time he and janet thought that there might be like a rational non -demonic denominational spooky cases make us crazy also fires do i guess fires make us pretty crazy but yeah i feel like spooky is usually when we need like a little slowdown that's it yeah that's when we really just shake out all the goofies you know so yeah they thought that no demons just rations and rationalities yep so they were worried though that the smell was being caused by subsidence from all the heavy mining going on in the area at the time so subsidence
for those who don't know because i didn't know i also don't know it's when a land of area an area of land excuse me starts to cave in on itself oh and i guess it smells i don't know i was gonna say that it's stinky i think that i don't know why they thought it was so smelly but Jack contacted the department of mines and he was told to check the foundation of the house for signs of cracking and crumbling but they didn't find any they're like there was no evidence that this was going on so once again the smurls were at a loss to explain the unexplicable happening in their home yeah so since moving
into the duplex in late 1973 they had endured more than a decade of unusual and like sometimes pretty frightening events in in their home like small fires and that's a long time to keep up a ruse it is and after a while they said they just stopped looking for any kind of rational explanation and they just came to terms with the fact that they lived in a haunted house yeah and they were cool with that for a little bit yeah they were just like you know like footsteps the small fire seemed to stop i guess they figured out a way to make it not smell like rotten meat yeah but then in 1985 all that changed
again because the activity took a dark and decidedly more threatening turn one winter afternoon in late 1985 janet was in the basement just you know separating laundry and running through her to -do list in her head just stay at home mama things and she was loading up the washing machine while she did this and as she was doing that she thought she heard someone call her name janet and so she stood up a little bit straighter and kind of like listened closer just waiting to see if the voice would call out again and she was just about to explain it away way as you know like coming from the tv upstairs
or something when she heard it again a soft female voice calling janet and it seemed like it was coming from behind her so she whipped around to confront the voice but like we know no one was there oh so that that experience seemed to contradict that like everything janet knew about ghosts and hauntings just from watching tv and movies it was the middle of the day all the lights were on in the house she was like why would this happen right now but still here she was trying to listen over the sound of the washer and dryer for someone to call her name again huh and she said she that she was just
thinking about how violating it was having something in her house that she couldn't see like she was just thinking that when she heard the voice call out her name again oh and this time janet made horror mistake movie number no fucking a horror movie mistake number one and she screamed at the voice what do do you want oh no you never do that janet you never do that nope you don't say who's there and you don't say what do you want and you don't say be right back nope but obviously there was no reply so she made her way toward the stairs stairs and she started climbing up them slowly backwards all
the way to the top because she was fucking terrified oh my god when you just said that for some reason for a split second I was picturing like in like those scary like exorcism movies where they like throw themselves backwards and like spider up the stairs so janet just and i was like whoa in my head i was like oh my god you said that so casually but no you just meant like a normal person like she was like backing up back up the stairs okay she was also like they geeked out thank you for clarifying that for me no problem anytime i had the wrong idea imagine if she just like like dead girled up
the stairs yeah like you know like haunted person no big deal but as soon as she got to the top she heard her name again like this thing was was fucking with her so she ran to the kitchen and she said she dropped to her knees and immediately started praying and she said that she continued to periodically return to the kitchen and pray like that for the rest of the night damn and i guess it went away it's exhausting one would think so according to the smurls they had spent more than a decade laughing off or you know trying to rationalize the strange events that occurred in their home but this was different
this time something spoke janet's name it knew her yeah and it was in her home without her permission yeah so that night she went to jack about it and she was like i'm not cool with this like this is something i can't ignore no way we're not on a first name basis here no person think they are exactly now as a devotely catholic couple they had accepted a certain belief in a paranormal world but it was one thing to believe in it a totally different thing to actually experience of course of it so they agreed that they should start looking into options for help but then the topic just kind of fell
by the wayside and they continued about their day -to -day lives that makes sense so a few months went by and you know after janet's experience with the voice in the basement nothing happened but then something did happen but then it happened she had a second experience and this time it was way more convincing so months go by and then one february morning after she had sent all the girls off to school she was in the kitchen ironing it's i feel like these these ghosts don't like house chores no they don't they're like what are you doing they're honestly just telling her to live a little yeah but she
was ironing and she said that she felt a sudden cold chill rush into the room and she said she looked up from her chores like thinking oh she'd left a window open or something only to see a quote black human shaped form standing about 10 feet away from her oh and she later said to be honest i wasn't sure at first whether it even existed i knew there was was a possibility that i was hallucinating or something but then it started moving toward me and i knew then that there was no doubt about it the thing whatever it was was real very real but before the mass started moving toward janet she just
stood there not really wanting to run or like move any kind of muscle that would alert it so she just stood there holding her iron in one hand and staring at the mass in her kitchen she said eventually quote this is wild a cape fluttered from its back but was what was most upsetting was that the face had no features at all huh a cape so it was a superhero no it was stylish oh excuse me obviously sorry i thought a superhero i mean maybe who am i to say who we don't know who this i'm not the local authority i'm not either i'm big it could be either it could be a stylish superhero you know look at that we
we don't know so she said the thing didn't appear to be a solid mass she could kind of see through it slightly and she said it was the height of an average man but all of the sudden the shape began moving toward her and she's just standing there frozen in place with shock and it just kind of like moves through her like like moves like no you know nope now i don't i don't want you know how that happens like you'll just be ironing and then like you just let the mass yeah just just move right through you don't know about that no i don't be either but janet does and she said after a minute or two
had passed she finally composed herself enough to look around the room but it was gone no because now it's inside of you i think i don't know i'm worried for you janet or maybe it like went through a wall or something because i also just thought about the cape thing stylish and superhero are both like pretty innocuous you're like that's fun yeah what if it's like jack the ripper he's always wearing a cape white literally know that you were we're gonna say that.
In the pictures, he's always wearing a cape.
And it's wild because you have a Jack the Ripper, like, pub thing behind you.
Oh, yeah. And he, that's a black figure.
Yep. With a cape about the height of a man.
Oh, I don't love that.
Hate it. I don't love that.
Hate it. So, a few minutes later, she kind of went through the house and, like, checked the other rooms, but just like the voice she had heard in the basement, there was no sign of this figure anywhere.
So, when she was sure that it wasn't hiding anywhere in the house, she went over to her in -laws side of the house and knocked on the door not really sure what the fuck she was going to tell her mother -in -law but sure that she needed to talk to like anybody about what just happened now for as long as janet had known her mother -in -law mary mary had been this warm comforting presence in her life but on that day there was something very off about mary oh so the two of them sat there in the living room janet you know just trying to figure out how to explain what the fuck she had just gone through to
mary when mary leaned forward and said to her i have to tell you something janet oh no there's something about mary there is so janet could tell that mary was really upset so she was like okay like yeah tell me and mary goes maybe you won't believe me janet i don't know if i believe me maybe i'm getting old and then she explained that she had been sitting in the living room praying a short time earlier when she saw what appeared to be the hazy black shape of a man come through her wall as though it had simply walked through a door from janet's side of the house damn the form the form mary told
janet i was sitting here in my chair saying my novenas i don't know i don't know when i felt some kind of presence i looked up and saw this black form up here it walked past me and disappeared so they both had the same experience like whenever the shape left janet's just went straight to mary it went through the wall to mary's side of the house wow so even though it doesn't really look like it's doing anything though i think he's just passing through it's just vibing yeah he seems like he's just observing saying girlies go to lunch with each other and be ladies who lunch just like do something
you at least he's not being well not yet you know i assume this this doesn't stay as docile i don't know as he is right now i don't know so even though they were both still scared absolutely shitless they were both a little relieved that they both seen the same thing and you know they weren't necessarily losing it yeah it was validating to know that they weren't hallucinating or having any kind of episode and that validation only strengthened janet's belief that they couldn't wait any longer to do something about this like this presence in their home was getting more and more frightening as the months
and days passed yeah but the problem was that jack hadn't seen what his wife or his mother had seen and he was still very much of the belief that there was a rational explanation for what was going on i don't know how you rationalize like a black shape shifting thing with a cape walking through your house but that's so jack talk to jack about it that's so jack to try to rationalize yeah you know very jack thing to do it is i agree yeah so a few more weeks passed without any unusual incidents in the home and you know jack and janet suspected that their ordeal was over it just ended one day yeah
but their hopes went went down the drain later that spring when a light fixture in the kitchen came crashing down out of nowhere almost landing on janet and heather who luckily managed to get under the table to avoid all the falling debris but shannon that one of their daughters on the other hand didn't move out of the way fast enough and the large fixture caught her in the shoulder and knocked her down to the floor oh so jack he looks up at the ceiling and he was shocked because when when he sees the hole in the ceiling it didn't look like the light had just fallen it looked like it had been
ripped out of the ceiling he said by some kind of force what yeah so this incident reminded them about their commitment to find outside help for this problem they were experiencing but they didn't know where to start janet said after that we spent hours days weeks talking to people who might possibly be able to help us but unfortunately a lot of the people that the the Smurls reached out to in the beginning weren't really taking them seriously yeah because remember this is like the 80s and everybody's like what the fuck are you talking about not a lot of people had gone through this before no now
one of the people that they reached out to just implied that maybe they were watching too many horror movies and were letting their imaginations run wild wow and Jack and Janet were really pissed off about that yeah I would be pissed off too right yeah so by the late spring the haunts in the Smurl house had escalated considerably And now included physical assaults.
Ooh. This is strange.
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So, in one instance, Jack claimed that he woke up from a nap to find himself suspended in the air above his bed.
And at first, he thought that he was still dreaming, but as he emerged from a sleepy state he realized that he was very much awake and after thrashing around in the air for a few seconds he dropped from the air and landed back on the bed with no sign of what had caused this experience um i the only thing i can think of is he turned 16 years old and he became a witch finally a la sabrina the teenage but he had already turned 16 long ago so it doesn't work it doesn't i don't know if they officially don't have an explanation that was my explanation There's no explanation.
No, it's going to get particularly steamy here.
So weeks after that, on a particularly steamy night in more ways than one in June, Jack and Janet had just finished getting together, if you're picking up what I'm putting down.
Good for them. I know, you know.
And they were laying in bed together when suddenly something grabbed Janet by her ankle and started pulling her from the bed a la the movie we were talking about this morning, Paranormal Activity.
Oh. Oh, so Jack grabbed a hold of Janet and he held tightly onto her as whatever it was that was trying to do whatever it was trying to do with her was trying to rip her from the bed.
Still, oh my God. He said it was like a tug of war going on.
I was holding on to her as hard as I could because I had no idea what the thing wanted to do to her.
But the harder I tried to keep her next to me, the harder it pulled on her.
Oh, I hate it. Now, after a few more seconds, whatever was pulling Janet abruptly let go and just seemed to vanish.
Huh. and it left behind a horrible odor and started banging on the walls as it left so it farted in the left it kind of did i guess it boofed and then it and then it i was trying to think of the word like it boofed and then it banished itself wow no that's rude i know that right after they finished their you know moment together sure this moment together it tries to steal her and then can't so just farts like that's so shitty it is that'll wow that'll ruin any hope of a encore like whatever just happened yeah that's a bummer i know so in the months that followed the assault on the smurl house
continued and got worse and worse day after day jack and janet said they They could hear the hissing of phantom snakes, drawers and cupboards opening and closing on their own, and heavy footsteps, of course, walking up and down the halls at night.
So they were totally still at a loss for what to do because they're still even reaching out to people and getting doors slammed in their face everywhere they go.
So Janet started reading about the supernatural in any book that she could get her hands on, and she also started keeping a diary of all the things that were happening in the house.
And then soon, one afternoon in early 1986, a call from a friend changed the course of the Smurls' lives in ways they never could have imagined.
You don't say! I do say.
After a blessing by their parish priests failed to resolve the haunting, Jack and Janet were starting to lose hope.
But then a new solution presented itself in the form of a phone call from Janet's friend Carla.
carla i knew it was gonna be carla who was gonna break this wide open tell john yeah so carla and janet had been friends for years and janet had confided in her girl carla yeah about all the things going on in the house and especially how much it had been affecting the family because at this point it's affecting their relationships with one another yeah clearly you gotta be a ghost so carla mentioned that she had come across the name of a professor professor nope who taught at Marywood College, which was a private Catholic school in Scranton.
Scranton? Pennsylvania.
I thought you were going to do the whole thing.
I was going to, but I thought it would be annoying.
And then I almost went to sing it, but then my brain said to sing the Bluey song.
Which is not like the Office song.
But anyways, so Carla's like, hey, I know this professor who teaches at a Catholic school and he has been studying the subject of demonic possession and it kind of sounds like that's what you're dealing with.
Wow, that's pretty awesome.
Convenient. I know super convenient but after all the negative experiences that Janet had contacting like academics like this in the past she wasn't very hopeful she was actually kind of worried but it was going to be a waste of time but she was like you know what my friend Carla is my good girl I'm gonna listen to her what do I have to lose let me appease my friend here and give this guy a call so she does and the professor at Marywood College explained that his interest in the subject was purely academic and he really didn't think there was much he could do to help help but he did provide them
with the contact information of two people who could most definitely help two people are you talking about ryan and shane from buzzfeed unsolved no as much as i fucking love those two individuals i'm talking about ed and lorraine warren i bet you didn't even couldn't tell i could never have guessed and i said i bet you didn't even couldn't tell i didn't even couldn't have told you were correct in your assumption oh man and he described them as professional psychic researchers that quote have even been hired by the united states army fuck yeah which i know nothing about i don't either look at that now
by the summer of 1986 ed and lorraine they had built up quite a name for themselves on the talk show show circuit and among certain circles uh you know for their involvement in dealing with the supposed haunting of george and kathy lutz's house in amityville new york i don't know if you guys have heard of that one i don't know maybe you've heard of this one the claims of demonic possession in the murder trial of uh arnie johnson oh have you heard of that one elena covered it and there was a bunch of other things that they were known for so some people had faith in ed and lorraine but most people
were deeply skeptical, skeptical even, about their methods and motives.
And the more vocal skeptics and scientific investigators usually pointed to documentation of fraud surrounding the Warrens, like the Lutz's admission of fraud in the Amityville case as evidence of their sus intentions.
Now, for their part, Ed and Lorraine always maintained that their intentions were good and that Lorraine had powers as a psychic medium and those were genuine powers yeah she said we have a single message we want to get across to people there's a demonic underworld and that on some occasions it can be a terrifying problem for people which like i agree with seems legit pour one out for lorraine now after a brief telephone conversation with the smurls ed and lorraine were pretty sure they could actually help the couple so they agreed to travel from their home in connecticut to pennsylvania as soon as
possible and in their initial interview with the smurls ed and lorraine it kind of ran through their standard battery of questions regarding the couple's familiarity with satanism use of ouija boards practice of witchcraft all the activities that the warren said could lead to a demonic infestation you know yeah obviously you know that now as ed warren continued his interview with the smurls when they finally got out there lorraine started exploring the house and she was accompanied by her friend rosemary who also claimed to have psychic abilities and also had a baby no huh maybe i actually have no fucking
idea but i saw what you were doing there i picked up what you're putting down now the two psychic mediums immediately sensed the presence of evil oh no you won't get that unless you watch spongebob but it seemed to get stronger as they they made their way up the stairs to the second floor of the house.
And after exploring the second floor, when they reached the door to Janet and Jack's bedroom, they sensed that they would find whatever it was they were looking for behind that door.
Oh. But they checked the bedroom and they found nothing in the actual bedroom.
All that remained was to look in the couple's closet.
So they did. Now, up to that point, lorraine and rosemary claimed to have identified three ghosts in the smorrell home two were benign and one was very angry now later when they were assembled at the kitchen table lorraine presented the profiles of the entities she believed were haunting the smorrell's home the first was an elderly woman lorraine said that she was quote probably senile but not violent she's just confused okay the second spirit was a young woman lorraine described as and this is her words not not mine an insane violent spirit who might want to harm you oh but she said the spirit
could be dealt with through prayer and then there was the third ghost a man with a mustache who quote possesses the ability to carry out great harm oh man so lorraine that mustache it's the mustache always so lorraine has problems everywhere mustache what did i say in buffy the other day they always tell lies don't trust a mustache never they always lie yeah listen to buffy the rewatcher do it.
Lorraine admitted that other than that she received no information from this specific ghost at that time or entity but finally they got to the fourth entity in the house which I believe they found in the closet and they said this demon Lorraine said was there to quote create chaos and destroy the family.
Oh shit destroy them so once.
Total domination prepare for total domination domination and then do the sparky arm micky's doing the actual the actual dance fantastic bring it on now once elena finished presenting you know her spirit profiles on bumble just kidding ed took over the conversation he told jack it's like i said before jack i suspect that the demon has been in the house dormant for decades but one thing i know is that your girls reaching puberty gave the demon energy energy gross okay i don't love that i don't even like it i don't even i actually don't perceive that i just don't perceive it i don't accept it uh
he said ed to to jack he said his he told them about his belief that adolescents possessed a ton of psychic energy that had the potential to attract and even activate non -human entities leading to all manner of panera paranormal Paranormal Phenomena Panera.
All manner of cheddar broccoli soup.
All manner of a you pick two.
Are you getting a cookie on the side, Jack?
Because it's time to end this shit.
It's gonna be hungry business.
No, I'm glad you didn't.
Of Paranormal Phenomena.
There you go. He told the family, quote, You should get the broccoli jelly.
You're like a battery it draws on for power.
It's a real psychic explosion.
It wants to keep you and your family confused and afraid.
That's why it often appears to only one of you at a time.
Which is true. Okay.
So based on their initial investigation, Ed and Lorraine concluded that in addition to the three ghosts haunting the house, a demon had latched onto the smurls and was drawing energy from the family.
And because it was able to draw this energy from the family, it was growing more powerful and more aggressive, and it was wearing on them day after day after day.
Janet remembered, As we listened to the Warrens and Rosemary talk, I remember feeling a strange combination of relief and dread.
The dread came from knowing that Ed and Lorraine and Rosemary were confirming our worst suspicions.
Our house had been taken over by a demon. A daemon!
And the rest, you'll have to wait to hear.
In part two, but their house had been taken over by a fucking demon, y 'all.
It certainly has. And Panera.
It has. Yeah. Cheddar broccoli soup everywhere.
That's the kind of haunt I'm in for as long as I've got a lactaid.
Seems pretty rad, but a little sticky and smelly eventually.
Smelly. Oh, maybe we just cracked the code.
It was cheddar broccoli soup.
When did Panera? Panera.
It's fun to say it like that.
Do you ever say Panera instead of Panera?
I do. I wonder when they opened.
Huh? Oh, that's good.
We'll update you in part two.
Part two, we'll let you know when Panera opens and if it was their fault.
So, yeah. We hope you keep listening.
And we hope you keep it weird. But that's a way that you don't get a you pick too after this because why wouldn't you?
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